A/N: For this month's One-shot, I really just wanted to put a silly idea on paper.

Without further ado, enjoy!

S.O.N.G. 3008

"I still can't thank you enough for accepting my invitation to spar!" The Tsubasa from another universe says excitedly as they enter the training room. "I know there's that whole mental link stuff to worry about, but at the same time, we know ourselves better than anyone else, so it'll seriously help us both in the end!"

"I agree, Tsubasa" The Tsubasa of the prime universe replies as the door starts to close behind them. "While I would've otherwise been opposed to this in the past, given what we've faced recently, this can really-"

"WAIT! DON'T LET THAT DOOR CLOSE!"

Suddenly, the two Tsubasas were met with multiple voices shouting as a stampede of footsteps approached. Within moments, Chris, Kirika, Shirabe, and Elfnein bolted past them to try and catch the door before it closed, but just as they reached it, the door shut, which made them all sigh in frustration.

"Oh! My apologies, Yukine. I didn't realize you, Akatsuki, and Tsukuyomi were using the training room." Tsubasa apologizes. "That being said, why is Elfnein in here, too?"

"Great! Now we've got two more people stuck in here!" Chris sighs heavily, turning around to face the Tsubasas. "Hi Senpai... And, other Senpai?"

"Heya, other Chris!" AU Tsubasa replies with a wave. "Why were you all sprinting for the door like that? Shouldn't you be able to open it?"

"Normally, yes." Chris answers, before giving Elfnein a sideways glance. "Care to explain, Shrimp?"

Walking forward, Elfnein started out by bowing her head before speaking. "I made some changes to the training room to make it more spacious, while also allowing for more recreational usage, or if we ever needed to use it for something such as refuge."

"That sounds like a good addition to HQ." Tsubasa says. "So why are you apologizing for that?"

"Because-"

"Because the door can now only be operated from outside!" Chris interjects angrily. "The two of us have been stuck in here for the past few hours!"

"Kiri-chan and I got here a couple hours later." Shirabe says. "We heard about Elfnein-chan's changes, so we wanted to try it out."

"We wanted to try ice skating in the summer dess!" Kirika adds.

"But it's like early spring right now." AU Tsubasa says in confusion.

"Not important!" Chris interjects again.

"I'm so sorry, girls..." Elfnein apologizes.

"What even gave you the idea to make the door only operational from outside the training room?!" Chris asks.

"Well, Kanade-san showed me this classified document about a store with infinite space that had things like regenerating food and endless furniture, so I wanted to try and modify the training room to be a lot like it." Elfnein explained, which made Chris go on the verge of exploding with fury.

"You modified the training room... With a FICTIONAL ANOMALY?!" Chris shouts, shaking Elfnein.

"Yukine, calm down!" Tsubasa shouts, prying Elfnein out of Chris' hands. "If all we have to do is wait for someone else to enter, then we can just call someone to hold the door open."

"That would be a wonderful idea..." Chris says sarcastically. "If this room had any form of cell service!"

"I ran into multiple problems getting the room to properly function with cell service, so I had to turn it off while I worked." Elfnein states.

"Hold up… Did you ask me to come with you because you thought there would be monsters inside the training room?" Chris asks, getting silent embarrassment as a reply from Elfnein. "I don't care if she's the only wielder in her universe, I'm going to murder that rooster on sight for planting this damn idea in your head!"

"Well, if backup isn't an option, then why not try and bust open the door?" AU Tsubasa asks, getting a concerned look from Tsubasa. "I'm just saying it could work."

"Chris-Senpai already tried that." Shirabe says.

"With every single weapon her Symphogear can make dess." Kirika adds.

"I mean, blast-proof doors were already part of this room long before we were in a submarine." Tsubasa states.

"Well, there goes that suggestion then…" AU Tsubasa sighs. "I know our universe's facilities are pretty much the same as yours, but it's honestly impressive that you guys have everything thought out."

"Well, Elfnein is the one to thank for that." Tsubasa says. "Given the circumstances, I still think the additions to the training room are impressive, and will be even better once Elfnein is able to get the kinks worked out."

"Thank you, Tsubasa-san." Elfnein replies, happy to finally have a positive response in their predicament.

Hearing this, Chris realizes how harsh she has been towards Elfnein, which made her feel bad. "Hey, Elfnein… Sorry for lashing out like that…." She says. "I was so focused on trying to get outta here, I never stopped to think that you were just trying to make things interesting for everyone."

"It's alright, Chris-san." Elfnein replies. "I know you were just upset that we're locked in here, so there's no need to apologize."

"No, I shouldn't have acted like that to begin with!" Chris states. "You came to me for assistance, and all I've done since getting in here is whine and complain. Similar to what Senpai was saying, you're to thank for practically everything we've been able to do, so you didn't deserve any of my aggression."

"Well, all the same, I forgive you, Chris-san." Elfnein says.

"Wow, I'm surprised that was enough to make Chris-Senpai calm down…" Kirika says to Shirabe.

"Well, she holds a lot of respect for Tsubasa-san, and rightfully so." Shirabe says to Kirika.

"Aww… Did I miss all the fun?"

Just then, the door opened, revealing Kanade with a smirk on her face. With her arrival, however, Kirika and Shirabe bolted for the door, making sure at least they were outside the training room, should the door close again. "Chris-senpai! Elfnein-chan! Hurry before the door closes again dess!"

With a nod, Elfnein ran for the door. However, Chris didn't move. "Close it." She said to the trio outside the training room, who looked at her in confusion. "I'll knock when I'm ready to come out."

Without hesitation, the Zababa duo understood what Chris meant, and did as she asked. At the same time, Kanade was confused by Chris' anger. "Yeah, I'm lost. Hey, Tsubasa, why does Chris look like she's about to blow a fuse?" Kanade asks.

"We would explain, but I feel like, Yukine would like to do the talking in that regard." Tsubasa answers.

"That, and Tsubasa and I have a sparring match to get started, so we'll be over here for now." AU Tsubasa adds. "Yo, Chris. Can you let Elfnein know that we'll knock too when we're done?"

"Gladly." Chris replied coldly.

"Cool cool!" AU Tsubasa says with a thumbs up. "Well, it was nice knowing you, Kanade!"

"Huh? What do you mean by that?" Kanade asks, concern rising as she walks over to the door, seeing that it would not open. "So… Hehe… What's up, Chris?"

"I have to thank you for giving the Shrimp the idea to turn our training room into a fictional anomaly." Chris says, which immediately made Kanade realize what was wrong. "So how about I return the favor for getting us stuck in here for hours on end, Yukine-style!"

"L-Look, in my defense, I showed her that 'file' to see if she could actually make it real. I didn't think she would conceptually follow it 1 to 1." Kanade states. "I mean, at least she didn't add the monsters inside the endless store."

"Oh, I wouldn't be so sure about that one." Chris says with a sinister smirk as she pulls out her symphogear and activates it.

"Killter Ichaival tron"

Seeing this, Kanade turned pale, knowing Chris was not about to give her the time to transform. "Any last words?" Chris asks.

Scared, Kanade tried to think about a way out of her predicament, but she immediately got an idea. "Is that really what the Tsubasas' call sparring? They should really get a room for that." Kanade says, acting flustered by what she saw.

"They're doing what?!" Chris gasps, turning around to look at the Tsubasas, only to see them locked in combat. "Oh, they're just spar- YOU BITCH!"

Sure enough, Kanade made a run for it the moment Chris turned around, disappearing behind a building as soon as she could. Flustered by the trick and already furious with Kanade for starting all of this, Chris screamed loud enough to be heard clearly from outside the submarine.

"GET BACK HERE!"

"Should… Should we stop her before she actually kills Kanade?" AU Tsubasa asks, momentarily stopping their fight.

"Yukine may be furious, but she wouldn't actually kill someone. I hope…" Tsubasa answers, the last bit concerning her alternate self. "Let's just focus on our sparring match for now."

Still a little concerned for Kanade's safety, AU Tsubasa eventually shrugged as the blues and the reds would go about their own battles in the infinite training room, the former of the two looking less likely to end in bloodshed than the latter…

A/N: And with that, we end the one-shot!

As stated earlier, I just wanted to put a silly idea on paper with this one XD.

And yes, the "fictional anomaly" was SCP 3008, aka Infinite Ikea (hence the one-shot title.)

But with that being said, there isn't really much left to add. Thank you all for reading, stay tuned to my socials for updates, memes, etc, and I'll see you all in the next one!