Chapter Twenty-Two:

Kick Out the Comedians

Swag and Chris rolled their eyes with annoyance.

Neither of them had the time for someone as annoying and worthy-of-kicking-in-the-face as Depresso. And yet, he was standing in front of them, holding a VIP card in one hand while holding a horn in the other. He was threatening to make the guards hear his honking for four hours if they didn't let him see the head of the casino.

"Okay, fine. You can go up..." Swag said to the red-nosed bozo, "But no detours!"

"Do you realize we have security cameras EVERYWHERE?!" Chris demanded.

"Bruh, I just wanted to make sure he got the message."

*HONK* "Can I go in the elevator now?!" Depresso said with annoyance.

The guards stepped aside, with Swag cautiously clicking his gun, and the squat humanoid stepped towards the lift as the doors opened. Depresso tapped the up button, making sure he got the right floor number, even with Swag pointing suspiciously to the sad clown.

"Swag, it's rude to point!" Chris told the dim-witted guard.

"I just wanna make sure he does nothing sus, screw you!" Swag retorted.

"Pointing is rude."

"You point too, bucko!"

"Quit being an idiot and do your job like a competent guard, unless you want us to get fired just like at the Desert Prison, with the Anime Secret Service, and with McDonald's! You want to wind up getting suspended, just like how we wound up working at Omnia Academy?!"

Depresso barely heard Swag's response as the elevator doors closed. A pinging sound filled the lift, and he was tapping his foot to the sound of music. The walking bag of sadness and "comedy" hummed a little tune, almost in sync with the beeping that emitted within the elevator. Moments later, he heard a pinging sound, and the doors opened.

'To the CEO's office.'

He stepped forth from the elevator onto a red carpet, and walked down the hall. A security camera on the wall followed his movements, but Depresso didn't even notice it, he didn't even care about the casino's security.

The red-nosed goofball of depression inched towards the receptionist desk, finding Ms. Pinweeler, the receptionist, waiting. And, when she heard his approach, Ms. Pinweeler leaned over the desk to see Depresso. He looked up at her, fully aware that he wasn't very popular in the Mushroom Kingdom, but hoping he would be allowed to see the CEO.

"Anything we can help you with?" Pinweeler asked.

"I've come to speak with your boss about casino entertainment matters." Depresso said as clearly as possible.

"May I ask for your name?"

"You can call me Depresso." Depresso flashed a mischievous grin, "No, really. That's what I'm called, I... couldn't come up with a better name."

Pinweeler studied him for a while, then she gestured to the door, "Go on in."

Depresso nodded, and stepped towards the entrance to the CEO's office. He pushed open the door, and walked inside to the sound of machinery whirring. He spotted a purple notebook on a dais, surrounded by machines that were operating on it, a scene that he didn't care about.

He turned towards the CEO's desk, and, when he expected to find someone human, he found a large cardboard drawing of a fat man with a mustache. Depresso was nearly beside himself in a moment, he recognized who was behind the desk, and the not-so funny little man couldn't believe what was going on.

"Marty?!" Depresso exclaimed as he took a seat at the desk, "Wow, I didn't think that, after seeing you run a pizza shop and playing cards with me, you'd take up the job of running a casino. How've you been?"

Silence.

"Man, I wish you had a voice..." Depresso chuckled, "And you running a casino? Looks like a Pizza Shop wasn't all that fulfilling in the end, given why Mario made ya in the first place."

Right on cue, Mario entered the room.

"My lord!" The fat Italian exclaimed, "Someone wants to..." He saw Depresso and batted his eyes with annoyance, "Oh, look who it is."

"Hey, Mario!" Depresso waved, "Is this some sort of joke? First, you run a Pizza Shop and make Marty to help you with that business, then here you both are at Casino Paisano. You can't be THAT rich, how are you managing this?"

"Marty is the CEO of Casino Paisano." Mario said firmly, stepping to Marty's side, "And I, Mario, am the head of security. Also, I will be speaking for Marty since I am here. So, state your business."

Depresso grinned. "Well, I was hoping you'd give me the chance to work in the casino as an entertainer." He explained, "In fact, since I'm a clown, I was thinkin' maybe I could do a comedy act, tell some jokes. This casino does shows, right? Let me take part in the entertainment, I think people would really like me."

"Really?" Mario studied him with a frown, "And what do you think, sir?"

On Depresso's end, he heard silence. On Mario's end, he heard the voice of his boss, and Marty stared into his visitor's eyes with disdain.

'I have no need for him.' Marty told his creator, 'Depresso may be good at playing a game with me, but his sense of humor is mediocre. Put him on stage, and people will tear him apart in moments. He thinks he can be funny, but all I see is an emotional mess full of dangerous tears, and harsh morbidness. Dispose of him!'

"Okie-dokie." Mario glared at Depresso, "Marty will not allow you to perform your comedy act, your 'entertainment service' isn't needed. Begone!"

"Excuse me?!" Depresso spat, "I thought we were friends, Marty! How can you throw me out like that, without giving me a chance in the slightest? You rude, condescending piece of..."

Mario brought out a gun.

Depresso shrieked, leaped from his chair, and dove into an air vent, leaving the office behind. The depressed ball of misery scrambled through the shaft, and when he was somewhere more secluded, he began to sob. Tears rolled down his cheeks, and Depresso became more depressed than he already had...