Luigi fell out of the pipe, dropping onto his ass in the middle of a musky cave.
"Mario-o-o?" Luigi shivered, since he's a fucking nerd who's never seen a vag in his life.
"Luigi, c'mere! Luigi!" Mario exclaimed, running over with a glowing orange flower. "Think of the fun we could have with this!"
"Mario, what've I told you about messing with strange plants?" Luigi scolded. "You could get sick or something!"
"We could get fucking blazed with this, Luigi!" Mario said. "Don't be such a puss!"
"I'm not a puss," Luigi muttered, as Mario brought the flower to his mouth. "Wait, Mario, don't eat that-"
As he consumed the flower, Mario's tacky blue overalls suddenly glowed bright red, and his red shirt changed to white. Conjuring fire from his gloved hands, he released a manly roar and started committing mass arson.
"Stop putting shit in your mouth!" Luigi slapped Mario across the face, returning his overalls to their normal color and draining the bloodthirsty glare from his eyes.
"Mudderoffuck!" Mario said, falling on his face like the shithead he is.
"Mario, you idiot, you burned the whole place down!" Luigi yelled. "We gotta get the hell out of here now!"
"Hey look, another pipe!" Mario exclaimed.
"What is it with you and pipes?" Luigi said.
"I laid pipe on your mom last night."
"...What?" Luigi looked up to see Mario sliding into the pipe.
"Shit!" Luigi hopped onto the pipe, but some kind of carnivorous plant popped out and clamped onto his dick.
"AHHHHH FUCK!" Luigi cried. "MARIO! Mario…"
Suddenly, a glowing fucking star with eyes popped out of nowhere and bounced in front of Luigi.
"Well, hi there! How's it going?" said the star.
"Did you talk to me or am I just losing blood?" Luigi asked.
"Who gives a shit?" the star replied. "Open sesame, bitch!"
The star forced open Luigi's mouth and shoved itself down its throat. Luigi's entire body started glowing and he got super high because everyone's stoned in heaven. He ripped the plant out of the pipe, his dick literally growing from the sheer machismo.
"HAHA! Nobody's a match for Luigi!" the plumber yelled, throwing himself down the pipe. However, the inside of the pipe was slick with shit and his confident roar quickly turned to a scream.
As Luigi shot off a cliff, Mario looked on, tripping hard off magic shrooms. "The road to hell is paved with good intentions," he mused, hearing Luigi's screams grow faint as the clouds bounced happily on.