We Were Who We Should Have Been (MDZS)

by TheCompanyIKeep

Xue Yang has returned, and he's angry. In a series of convoluted events, an unlikely team forms to deal with the unruly demonic cultivator. It's time for Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng to work together again, but can they manage it? Can Lan Xichen move on from past betrayals? And can Jin Ling and Jiang Cheng come to terms with their new self-realizations?

36. Don't Read Into It

A storm gate opened within Wei Wuxian's array. White lightning arced around the scene of Jiang Cheng holding Jin Ling in his arms.

"Help the children!" Wei Wuxian cried, turning around to flash his bloody arms at the Lan brothers.

Without waiting for a response, he flung himself through the portal, landing hard on his chest as he was unable to catch himself with his hands still tied behind his back.

Jiang Cheng was speaking, but he couldn't hear what he was saying anymore. Jin Guangyao was no longer enhancing his senses.

As long as he was still speaking, though, he was still alive. Wei Wuxian wasn't too late.

"That's not him, Jiang Cheng!" Wei Wuxian screamed. "Jin Ling is all right, I promise! Don't do this!"

He saw Jiang Cheng tense. He'd heard him, but he didn't respond.

"Look at me, Jiang Cheng!" Wei Wuxian shouted. "Look at me!"

Surprisingly, he did.

His eyes were rimmed in red. His expression was one of resignation. But he'd done as Wei Wuxian had asked anyway.

"How do I know?" Jiang Cheng asked softly as Wei Wuxian struggled to pull his knees under himself to stand up. "I can't risk being wrong."

"You suspected this was fake," Wei Wuxian said. "You were right. Trust your instincts."

"I'm always wrong."

"Not this time. Please trust me."

Jiang Cheng shook his head and held the fake Jin Ling closer.

"I can't," he whispered. "I can't take that risk."

"Please believe me!" Wei Wuxian cried. "That Jin Ling is already dead. So just believe me! He's okay! I can take you to him! Look at me!"

Jiang Cheng was going to do it. He was going to give the last of his qi to that shadow.

Thankfully, Wei Wuxian had succeeded in getting his feet under him and was finally able to stand.

He jumped up and ran to Jiang Cheng, kicking him hard in the shoulder. Jiang Cheng had no fight left in him and fell over onto his side where he remained, barely breathing, but breathing nonetheless.

Wei Wuxian knelt and pulled the knife from the fake Jin Ling's stomach, taking care not to look too closely at him. The resemblance was uncanny.

He used the blade to cut himself free from his bindings, both pleased and surprised to find that it was real enough to do that. Since it was, he decided to take it with him. He concealed it within his robe before going to tend to Jiang Cheng.

Jiang Cheng hadn't moved at all since he'd kicked him. Wei Wuxian knelt beside him and gingerly poked his arm, afraid that at any second, he may spring up to hit him.

But he didn't.

"Can you hear me?" Wei Wuxian murmured.

No answer. Jiang Cheng didn't move.

Wei Wuxian got a little braver. He grabbed his shoulder and shook him.

"Jiang Cheng?"

This time, a quiet groan.

"Jiang Cheng, we have to move," he hissed, watching the mist roil around them. Jin Guangyao was angry.

"He was real," Jiang Cheng rasped. Wei Wuxian leaned over to hear him. "You have to help Jin Ling."

"He's not real," Wei Wuxian said. "Jin Ling is caught in a horror of his own right now. We have to move."

Jiang Cheng's brow furrowed. "You linked to him," he said. "He's real. Help him."

"I didn't link to Jin Ling."

Jiang Cheng's eyes slowly opened. He looked up at Wei Wuxian.

"You linked… to me?"

"Obviously," Wei Wuxian snapped. "Now get up and let's find a place to rest."

The mist was dancing feverishly. If the Lans had done as he'd said, there was no one to distract Jin Guangyao. There was no way to be sure which of them he'd go after first. They didn't have time for this.

But Jiang Cheng just stared at him. Wei Wuxian wasn't entirely sure that he could do much more than that anyway. He seemed incredibly weak. But he wasn't going to try to lift him and find out.

"You shouldn't have," Jiang Cheng whispered.

"What are you talking about? You would have died if I hadn't come to help! Can you stop being stupid and get up?"

"You should have let me die. I don't want your help."

"Stop," Wei Wuxian said shortly. "You don't get to choose whether I help you or not. You're delirious. All you have to do is walk."

"I can't… I don't want to be more indebted to you than I already am. Leave me here. Help someone else."

Wei Wuxian didn't know what to say. But he had to keep trying to convince him to move. There was no way in hell that Wei Wuxian was going to try to move him while he was conscious.

"I don't keep score," he said. "I only asked you to move. Can you do that so we don't both die?"

"Leave me."

"Move."

" Leave."

"No."

"Damn you, Wei Wuxian."

"Fuck you, Jiang Cheng."

Wei Wuxian snapped his mouth shut immediately and braced himself. But Jiang Cheng just closed his eyes and let out a long sigh.

Then, he laughed.

It started slowly and quietly at first before unraveling into something borderline unhinged. For a while, Wei Wuxian worried that he would stop abruptly and stab him, but he didn't. He giggled on the flagstones without even taking a breath.

Eventually, Wei Wuxian couldn't help it. He laughed with him.

If Jin Guangyao had come for them right then, Wei Wuxian imagined that he would have excused himself silently without ever making himself known. The two of them had clearly lost their minds. Better to find someone else to antagonize.

"All right, all right, get up," Wei Wuxian said once he'd gained enough control over himself to speak. "We have to go."

"I can't," Jiang Cheng wheezed, feebly wiping tears from his eyes. "I don't know why I keep laughing."

"If you can giggle like a child, you can crawl like one. Come on."

Jiang Cheng's laughter died down a little. He turned over onto his stomach and placed his palms on the stone as if he were going to push himself up, but he didn't move.

"I've got nothing left," Jiang Cheng said. "I can't."

Wei Wuxian buried his face in his hands.

He couldn't give qi to Jiang Cheng without the risk that it would count as permission for the huli jing to take it directly from Wei Wuxian as he pleased. He wasn't sure where the line was drawn for what counted as permission. Clearly giving to Jin Ling's shadow had counted, so it was possible that giving to someone who'd already consented would too.

"Don't hit me," Wei Wuxian muttered through his fingers.

"I couldn't even if I wanted to," Jiang Cheng said. "What's your stupid idea? You must have one if you're worried I'll hit you."

"You hit me a lot. Maybe I was just being proactive."

"So you don't have a stupid idea?"

"No, I do."

"Go on then."

Wei Wuxian sighed. It really was a stupid idea. He wondered if he should even bother suggesting it.

But when Jiang Cheng looked up at him expectantly, he said it. "I'll carry you."

To which Jiang Cheng immediately replied, "No."

Wei Wuxian dropped his hands to scowl at him. Jiang Cheng scowled right back.

"I know you hate it," Wei Wuxian said, trying hard to keep the annoyance out of his tone, "but now is not the time to be prideful. We need to get out of here."

"It's not-! Forget it," Jiang Cheng grumbled. "You're not carrying me."

"Why?"

"Because I said so."

"I'm not Jin Ling," Wei Wuxian said hotly. "That explanation isn't going to cut it with me."

"It doesn't work with him either," Jiang Cheng muttered under his breath.

He waited for him to give a more substantial reason, but he didn't.

So, Wei Wuxian did the only thing he could do: disregard everything he'd said and hope that Jiang Cheng was really as weak as he seemed.

Quick as a rabbit, he snatched Jiang Cheng's wrist and prepared to haul him up and over his shoulder. Before he could do so, however, he stopped.

It wasn't because Jiang Cheng fought back. He'd certainly tried to, but he was indeed as feeble as he'd said he was.

No, it was the look on his face. Unbridled terror stole away whatever frustration had been there before. He didn't even seem like he was seeing Wei Wuxian even though his gray eyes were undoubtedly locked on him. It was as if he'd suddenly been transported somewhere entirely different.

Wei Wuxian was so shocked, he dropped him, letting his arm slap hard against the stone.

"What?! Are you hurt?!"

Jiang Cheng's terror dissolved, immediately replaced by an annoyed frown. "If I was, letting go suddenly like that would have only made it worse."

"Sure, sorry… but are you? Let me see."

Jiang Cheng pulled his arm away when Wei Wuxian reached for it again.

"I'm not!" he insisted. "Leave me alone. Go help someone else."

"I told you, I'm not leaving! You're going to get us both killed if you don't get up."

Wei Wuxian grabbed at him again, and again, Jiang Cheng moved away.

"Stop being annoying!" Wei Wuxian cried.

"Don't touch me!"

"Then you grab me!"

"No!"

"I'm serious, Jiang Cheng. Those are your two options. Either you hold on to me or I'm going to grab you. Which will it be?"

Jiang Cheng's face was red with fury. But, very slowly, he reached up. Wei Wuxian turned around and dipped his shoulder down so he could grab it.

Once he'd placed both of his hands, Jiang Cheng mumbled, "You'd better not touch me."

Since he was facing away from him, it was safe for Wei Wuxian to roll his eyes. So he did.

"How else am I going to keep you from falling off?" he asked.

Jiang Cheng didn't answer. Instead, he lifted his hands and linked them together in front of Wei Wuxian.

"That's definitely going to choke me," Wei Wuxian said.

"Those are your two options," Jiang Cheng whispered. "It's this or I'm going to stab you."

It sounded like he was getting weaker again, which was certainly possible if Jin Guangyao was stealing more qi.

There was no way that Jiang Cheng would be strong enough to make good on his threat. But, Wei Wuxian couldn't forget the way he'd looked when he'd tried to lift him.

Annoyed as he was with the situation, he didn't want to do that to him again.

So, Wei Wuxian drew in a few deep breaths and struggled to his feet. As predicted, Jiang Cheng's hands rolled back against his throat, cutting off his air.

He went barely a few steps before he had to kneel down again, coughing hard enough to make himself gag. Jiang Cheng shivered behind him.

"You smell like a corpse," he groaned.

"I'm about to be one if you don't find a different way to hold on," Wei Wuxian snapped.

Jiang Cheng sighed and moved one of his arms under Wei Wuxian's. When he locked his fingers together again, they were centered over his chest.

"Anyway," Wei Wuxian said, standing once more, "it's not my fault I smell bad. Between you and Mia – Advisor Luo, there was no chance for anyone else to bathe."

"Hm," Jiang Cheng mumbled. "I'm going to have to clean up again after touching you."

"Likewise."

"Tch."

The fog was thick around them. Sometimes, Wei Wuxian couldn't even see his feet when he looked down at them.

He wasn't exactly sure where they'd started in the plaza. And he still had no clue as they moved about, but he figured that as long as they kept walking in a straight line, they would run into something eventually. If they could just find a place to rest inside, Wei Wuxian could think of a plan.

At first, Jiang Cheng was sort of walking with him. He stumbled every now and then, but he was supporting some of his own weight.

As they continued, however, he grew weaker. And before long, his feet were dragging on the cobblestones. His chin dug into Wei Wuxian's back.

"I think he's draining me," Jiang Cheng said. He'd spoken so softly that Wei Wuxian almost hadn't heard him.

"I think so too. Do you think you can keep holding on by yourself?"

He didn't say anything, but Wei Wuxian was painfully aware that he'd nodded. He'd pushed his chin even harder into his spine to do it.

"All right, just let me know if that changes. I can tie your wrists together or something."

Jiang Cheng's arms tightened for a moment. "Don't do that."

"Well I'll have to do something."

"No, you… you…"

"Jiang Cheng?"

The pressure in his back began to slide to one side. Jiang Cheng's fingers slipped by several centimeters.

"Jiang Cheng?" Wei Wuxian said again.

But there was no answer.

"I'm gonna kill that stupid fox, I swear," Wei Wuxian growled to himself.

He stopped and knelt on the ground. He tried to lower Jiang Cheng down carefully but underestimated exactly how heavy he was. Wei Wuxian winced as his body hit the ground with a loud thud.

"Oops," Wei Wuxian said to himself. "I definitely used to be stronger than this."

Gingerly, he picked up one of Jiang Cheng's arms, watching his face closely for any reaction. But there was none. His eyes remained closed, his brow vaguely furrowed.

Wei Wuxian placed two fingers against his wrist, not to check for a pulse but to measure the flow of qi through his meridians. He could faintly feel the energy coursing beneath his skin.

Jin Guangyao hadn't drained him of everything… yet.

"Uh, Jiang Cheng?" Wei Wuxian whispered.

No response.

"I'm going to lift you."

Still nothing.

Wei Wuxian scooped him up off the ground and threw him over his back again, praying he wouldn't wake up before they got where they were going… wherever that was.

As it so happened, 'wherever' ended up being the Scorching Sun Palace itself.

The stone beneath their feet switched from gray to black as Wei Wuxian mounted the base of the stairs. And goodness were there a lot of them! Stairs, so many stairs…

"I don…guh…" Jiang Cheng mumbled.

"What?"

Thunk.

"Fuck!" Wei Wuxian hissed.

Jiang Cheng's mumbling had distracted him. Or maybe the fog would have prevented him from seeing it.

Either way, Wei Wuxian walked headfirst into the wall of the Scorching Sun Palace, recognizable by its fine materials and aura of self-importance.

"I don't feel good," Jiang Cheng muttered again.

"You don't say," Wei Wuxian snapped.

He felt along the wall until he found the grand entrance. Tall double doors stood before them, the details of which he couldn't see in the mist, but he remembered them vividly. Rows of brass studs, each detailed with the Wen sun sigil, aligned neatly across the surface of high quality cedar doors that stretched up several meters overhead.

Usually, they opened with minimal force. But it had been decades since the palace was properly inhabited. Wei Wuxian expected that those enchantments would have long since worn off.

However, as he placed a palm on one of the doors, he felt the warmth of yang energy flowing within, as strong as it had been the first time Wei Wuxian had entered the Scorching Sun Palace.

Just a tiny push and those gargantuan doors slammed open against either wall with a resounding bang like a strike against the Wens' great horn drum.

Inside, the foyer was black as pitch.

Wei Wuxian couldn't will himself forward. It felt a little too much like stepping into the maw of a great monster (something that he actually knew a thing or two about). The space felt alive and the rhythmic flow of wind through the darkened chamber lent the impression of deep breathing.

But, he steeled himself and felt around in the pouches on his belt for an illumination talisman. Alas, he was notorious for packing haphazardly. He wasn't sure where he'd put them.

"Our talismans are gone," Jiang Cheng croaked. "You'll have to use something else."

Knowing that he would have to be closer to potential targets for a talisman to work anyhow, Wei Wuxian trudged into the foyer of the Scorching Sun Palace and heaved the double doors closed behind him.

He traced the lines on the floor with the blood from his wrist and ignited his makeshift talisman, which successfully lit six handsome low-hanging lanterns. It was enough to illuminate the foyer, but not enough to see down either of the two corridors at its wings.

A huge mural of the Wen Clan founder, Wen Mao, was painted on the wall opposite them. It depicted the founder's legendary battle against the famed Qiongqi beast – punisher of good and agent of evil.

However, the wall was slashed open in several sections. Most of the damage was concentrated over Wen Mao himself. His face, arms, and legs had all been destroyed by the four clans upon the downfall of the Wen Empire. All that remained of him was a very small section of his black breastplate and a single ray of his sigil on the banner he clutched in his hand.

"No," Jiang Cheng whispered. "Not here. If we have to hide, go somewhere else. Not here."

"Need I remind you that I can't see out there?" Wei Wuxian snapped. "I was lucky enough to actually find this place and it's huge. You think I'm going to be able to find one of the smaller buildings out there? Not a chance."

"Somewhere else," Jiang Cheng muttered, dropping his head back down onto Wei Wuxian's shoulder. "Anywhere else."

"Not an option."

Wei Wuxian faced the abyss that was the corridor leading to the north wing of the palace. And, ignoring a wave of dizziness that threatened to overwhelm him, he started down that path, leaving behind the promise of light and beautiful furniture carved from zitan wood, and delving into the unknown parts of the palace he'd never bothered to explore.

Still, he didn't really explore them. He couldn't keep making illumination talismans. There were far too many rooms to light in the palace. It was better to wait and only light whatever room they ended up in.

Wei Wuxian didn't know where he was trying to bring Jiang Cheng, but he figured it would be better to venture a little deeper into the palace rather than sit right at the entrance where the huli jing was most likely to look for them first.

"I think I'm going to be sick," Jiang Cheng said.

"Don't," Wei Wuxian replied quickly. "Not yet."

"I told you not to carry me, didn't I?"

"I'm serious. Don't you dare."

He continued to wander down the hallway, his knees growing weaker and weaker as he went. The miasma was taking its toll on him as well. A gnawing pain grew in the pit of his stomach. He was certain his bones were grinding unnaturally against one another when he placed his feet a certain way. He wasn't going to be able to keep carrying Jiang Cheng for much longer.

When Wei Wuxian was sure his legs were going to give out, he turned into the next room that opened up to them.

It was a less than graceful entrance. His dragging feet caught a rug on the floor and he tipped over, barely managing to catch himself on the edge of something wooden.

He completely lost his grip on Jiang Cheng, however, sending him sprawling onto the floor. Wei Wuxian felt around with his foot and found him lying somewhere nearby.

"What the fuck?" Jiang Cheng moaned.

"Sorry," Wei Wuxian replied. "Are you all right?"

"Better, now that I don't have to smell you."

"Pft."

Wei Wuxian traced and activated another talisman, igniting the only light source nearby – an expensive-looking lantern set at the edge of an equally expensive-looking table. Despite the fine décor, the room itself wasn't as grand as Wei Wuxian thought it should have been. More than likely, they'd wandered into the servant's quarters.

The rug on the floor was thick and richly colored. Four beds sat against the walls, each with a fancy table beside it for whatever belongings the servants might have had.

Naturally, not all of the servant's rooms would be so small. It depended on their family's status, where they ranked among the other staff, et cetera et cetera.

All of the rules were very tiring. So, it never failed to surprise him that Wei Wuxian had chosen to marry into arguably the most bureaucratic clan of them all.

Jiang Cheng sat up, not without difficulty.

"Do you still feel sick?" Wei Wuxian asked, wiping sweat from his own brow with the back of his hand. "Do you need me to find you a bucket?"

"No."

He looked almost back to his normal self. At the very least, he looked angry again. Jiang Cheng stared hard at the floor.

"Does this miasma affect you at all?"

"What?" Wei Wuxian asked, genuinely confused.

"Is it something to do with your demonic cultivation? Does it make you less susceptible?"

"I don't understand."

"How do you…?" Jiang Cheng cut off, clenching his fist in his lap. "Why aren't you more affected by this resentful energy than I am? Why am I the one who gets sick and passes out and feels my bones break beneath my skin?"

"Jiang Cheng, I really don't want to do this right now," Wei Wuxian said weakly, his arms beginning to tremble a little.

"You've had bones broken!" Jiang Cheng cried. "You've died! How are you still upright?!"

"You're being ridiculous. I carried you because your spiritual energy was seriously depleted. That has nothing to do with the miasma."

Jiang Cheng looked like he still wanted to fight. But he just stared at Wei Wuxian for a time until eventually the fire in his eyes smoldered away to nothing.

"…I can't believe I fell for its tricks," Jiang Cheng whispered defeatedly. "I'm so fucking stupid. You shouldn't have come for me."

"Not stupid," Wei Wuxian said. He was having trouble keeping his eyes open even in the dim light. "You couldn't prove anything. You did what you could. It's fine."

"You should leave. You shouldn't have wasted your time on me in the first place."

"Stop this," Wei Wuxian said. "I can't do this right now."

He knew Jiang Cheng was going to start shouting at him at any minute. And he was going to say what he always did. He was going to scream about how Wei Wuxian had always been better than he was and how he was doomed to live in his shadow. He was going to curse him for breaking his promises and for practicing the dark arts that had resulted in Yanli's death. He'd probably try to hit him too.

But Wei Wuxian just couldn't do it again. He really couldn't.

"I don't know why–" Jiang Cheng began heatedly but cut off, "-Wei Wuxian?"

His dizziness had reached its pinnacle. Wei Wuxian slumped forward, resting his cheek on his arm that was draped over the wooden frame of the bed.

"Happy?" Wei Wuxian panted. "You're the one who's upright now."

"Don't be stupid," Jiang Cheng said. His boots scuffed on the floor as he scooted nearer. "You said A-Ling was still out there somewhere. It's of no benefit to him for both of us to be lying here useless."

"Sure."

Jiang Cheng studied him closely. "Are you going to be sick?"

"No," Wei Wuxian said forcefully.

Moments later, his vision went blurry and a pressure built in the back of his throat.

"Uh, maybe," Wei Wuxian corrected.

But when his stomach turned violently, pitching him forward to retch nothing but flecks of spittle onto the floor, he changed his answer at last to "definitely".

Jiang Cheng stood slowly. Through the tears that had started to well in his eyes, Wei Wuxian watched as he crossed the room on shaky legs to retrieve a clay bowl from one of the bedside tables. He brought it back and dropped to his knees suddenly as he passed it to Wei Wuxian, almost like he'd been struck by something.

"This is ridiculous," Jiang Cheng said, speaking just loudly enough to be heard over Wei Wuxian's retching. "We can't stay here."

"We can't leave," Wei Wuxian said between gasps of air.

"I need to find Jin Ling!"

"Shh! He – ugh…"

Wei Wuxian coughed, but when nothing came up, he gingerly set the clay bowl on the ground and put his head back on his arm.

There was a beat of blissful silence. Unfortunately, it didn't last long.

"When did this happen to you?" Jiang Cheng asked.

Wei Wuxian closed his eyes, wishing that he would stop talking to him. He also didn't really understand his question.

"You've never been this sick that I can recall," Jiang Cheng went on. "Even after you fought the Xuanwu of slaughter."

"It doesn't matter."

Quiet again, but it was a tense kind of quiet.

Regardless, Wei Wuxian tried to use the moment of respite to take back some control over himself. If the miasma would keep forcing him to relive bad memories, maybe he could counteract it with good ones.

He focused on Lan Zhan and Sizhui and even some fun times with Jin Ling. But doing that didn't pull him far from the misery of starvation and a broken body. His happy memories were not so separate from depressing ones.

Kisses and outings with Lan Zhan were reminders of all the times he'd pushed him away. All those people that Sizhui had stood up to and told off for treating Wei Wuxian (then believed to be Mo Xuanyu) as less than human only served to remind him of how he'd failed to protect that little boy from the same. And Jin Ling…

…oh Jin Ling.

He barely had happy moments with him as it was. Those that they had shared were built on a foundation of lies. After all, how could one so easily accept the man responsible for tearing one's family asunder?

"Are you ignoring me?" Jiang Cheng asked testily.

"What? No."

"Care to elaborate, then?"

Wei Wuxian raised his head to scowl at him. "Oh we're sharing things now?" he asked coolly. "Why don't you start us off? Ever going to tell me what happened when you were captured by the Wens? Don't act like I'm the only one keeping secrets."

Jiang Cheng's nostrils flared. "Don't play that fucking game with me. I thought you were done with that."

"Done with what?"

"Trying to get me to say it," he hissed. "You already know. And yet, you do this. You always did this - acted clueless – just ignored it like it would go away, like you didn't want to see it."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

And because of that, he had no idea how furious he was making Jiang Cheng.

Violet sparks shot from Zidian, sending even more dizzying shadows up the walls.

"I KNOW YOU KNOW!" Jiang Cheng screamed. "THAT DOCTOR WAS LOYAL TO YOU! I KNOW SHE TOLD YOU!"

"Shh! Have you lost your mind?!"

"Have you?!"

He'd stopped yelling, but Zidian's light was still blinding.

"Look, it doesn't even matter, all right?" Wei Wuxian said, thankful that the miasma's effects were abating. "I only asked because I knew it would bother you. I shouldn't have done that. Let's think of how we're getting out of here."

"After you admit it."

"Admit what?"

"Admit that you know," Jiang Cheng said harshly. "Admit that Wen Qing told you."

"I don't kn-"

"I won't have you doing this to me again," he stated through gritted teeth. "Tell me."

Wei Wuxian was truly perplexed. He couldn't fathom why Wen Qing would know some secret of Jiang Cheng's that Wei Wuxian himself didn't. Jiang Cheng had never really trusted her. Hell, he'd tried to kill her during their first meeting, when he'd finally come to. It didn't make any sense…

It was then that Wei Wuxian recalled assisting Wen Qing in situating and resituating Jiang Cheng so she could heal him. She'd paused suddenly after noticing something, but before Wei Wuxian could try to inspect too, she'd stood abruptly and seized the sleeves of both Wen Ning and Wei Wuxian, telling them to wait outside and that she had to do the rest of the healing by herself.

Wei Wuxian had argued with her, fearful that it was some sort of convoluted trick designed to kill them or hand them back over to Wen Chao. Wen Ning had also argued since Jiang Cheng was starting to regain consciousness and he was worried his sister would be attacked again. But, Wen Qing was firm in her decision and threatened not to finish healing him at all if they wouldn't let her do the last part alone.

The look on her face as she'd closed the door on them…

"Seriously, I don't-" Wei Wuxian started to say.

In the blink of an eye, Jiang Cheng loosed Zidian completely. He had it wrapped around Wei Wuxian's neck before he could even move.

Wei Wuxian tensed, ready for the paralyzing jolt of pain to course through his body, but it didn't come.

Zidian crackled in his ears menacingly.

"Admit it," Jiang Cheng snarled.

His furious expression was exaggerated by the violet light. One wrong move, and Wei Wuxian might find himself dead for a second time. All Jiang Cheng had to do was give Zidian permission to unleash its full power.

But all he had left to him were wrong moves.

He could lie and say that Wen Qing had told him whatever it was that Jiang Cheng wanted to be a secret. But it seemed like Jiang Cheng wouldn't be very pleased with him knowing. And it seemed like Jiang Cheng wanted him to spell it out completely, which meant he actually had to know the secret.

Or he could tell the truth like he had been doing and hope that somehow, Jiang Cheng might be able to develop the ability to think rationally.

Neither were likely to work.

"I thought you were worried about Jin Ling!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed desperately. "We should figure out how to help him!"

It succeeded… a little.

Zidian's light darkened several hues. Jiang Cheng sat back a little.

But then the moment passed and purple returned to obnoxious pink once more.

"It'll take you no extra time to admit the truth," Jiang Cheng breathed. "Tell me. Admit that Wen Qing broke her promise."

"She didn't."

The answer had slipped from his lips before he could stop it.

He could admit that he'd broken promises of his own. And he could lie to Jiang Cheng. But he couldn't bring himself to besmirch Wen Qing's name, even to save his own skin.

"Liar."

Zidian snapped and popped around him. Any moment now, hot needles would race through Wei Wuxian's veins. A strangled whimper escaped him.

"Tell me the truth," Jiang Cheng demanded, his face centimeters from Wei Wuxian's.

"I did," Wei Wuxian said, panting. "You're going to draw attention to us. I'll scream if you use that against me."

"Tell me!"

"I did!"

Zidian's threats grew ever louder. Rarely had Wei Wuxian seen its coils glow so brightly without unleashing the energy within them. It was definitely enough to kill him now.

"I need to know!" Jiang Cheng roared. "Tell me!"

"I did!" Wei Wuxian shouted back at him. "I'm not going to tell you that Wen Qing broke her promise! If she promised you secrecy, then your secret died with her!"

Jiang Cheng's brows flicked upward. Then his jaw slackened and his expression turned from anger to something like anguish.

"No," he said, tightening his grip around Zidian. "You're lying. She was loyal to you, not me."

"Yes, but – well actually, no. Wen Qing was loyal to herself, her brother, and her own moral virtue. But…"

Wei Wuxian paused, bewildered by the change in Jiang Cheng's demeanor. He wondered briefly if he should say anything more. When Zidian was pulled even tighter around his neck, however, his hesitation vanished.

"But she made a promise to you," he continued. "Wen Qing was always an honest, upright kind of person. She wouldn't have gone back on her word, I assure you."

"She would have," Jiang Cheng snarled. But as he continued to talk, he sounded less and less sure of himself. "She had to have done it… she had no reason not to. She did betray me. I know she did…"

"She didn't."

"You have the recollection of an infant. You probably don't even remember."

Wei Wuxian smirked a little at the insult and regretted it immediately as Zidian pulled nearly taut around his throat.

Blood whooshed in his ears. At least he could still breathe.

"I just need to know that you know," Jiang Cheng said. "Tell me that you know. I can't… I can't keep second guessing myself."

"You're right," Wei Wuxian said.

Zidian loosened immediately.

"You're right about my terrible memory, I mean," Wei Wuxian clarified. "But you're wrong that I would have forgotten… whatever this is."

Jiang Cheng frowned.

"It's obviously a big deal," Wei Wuxian said. "I really don't think Wen Qing ever told me."

The crackling in his ears, which had already started to grow softer in volume, dwindled away to nothing. Zidian reverted to its ring form and Jiang Cheng sat back on his heels, stunned.

As soon as he was released, Wei Wuxian scrambled backward. He hit the back of his head against the table behind him, shaking the lantern on its surface.

"She didn't tell you," he said dully. "After everything I…"

Wei Wuxian shook his head from the other side of the room.

"I can't believe it."

He sounded relieved, but his face told a different story. His puckered brow and shaky breathing were hallmarks of distress.

Perhaps it would be best to change the subject. There was no telling whether Jiang Cheng would work himself back into frantic violence again.

"Are you feeling well enough to leave this place yet?" Wei Wuxian asked tentatively.

Jiang Cheng jumped a little at his words, seeming to return to himself from wherever it was that he'd gone. He pressed his hands to his face briefly and then nodded.

"I need to go to A-Ling," he said, starting to rise.

Jiang Cheng wandered over toward him. Wei Wuxian curled his fingernails into his palms, refusing to move away.

He flinched when Jiang Cheng pointed at the lantern and held out his hand expectantly.

"Where are you going?" Wei Wuxian asked as he passed it to him and watched Jiang Cheng turn toward the door.

"I'm going to find Jin Ling!"

"Wouldn't you rather use a storm gate?"

"Yes," Jiang Cheng said angrily. He whipped around and held out his hand again. "I forgot you had supplies. Give me your brush and paper."

"I'm afraid it won't be so easy this time…"

He pulled back his sleeve to show the oozing scratches on his arm. Jiang Cheng wrinkled his nose in disgust.

"Why would you have-? Ugh!"

Jiang Cheng had looked down to find bloodstains up and down his own sleeves. He started trying to wipe them off.

"Really?" Wei Wuxian said. "You're going to be fussy at a time like this?"

"I'm not fussy! You're repulsive! Why wouldn't you have used paper?! You got your blood all over me!"

"You really think I've been having the time of my life here while you and the kids are trapped in those creepy illusions? I don't have ink or paper either! The huli jing captured me too!"

"Me and the kids?" Jiang Cheng said slowly. "Where are Lan Wangji and Xi – Zewu-jun?"

Wei Wuxian arched his eyebrows. "They were trapped like I was. Triple array configuration. I couldn't figure out how to break it, so-"

"So you teleported out. Clever."

"Thanks," Wei Wuxian said even though he was pretty sure that Jiang Cheng hadn't meant to compliment him. "If they followed my lead, they should have escaped too."

"Which means that both those Lan boys are accounted for."

"Right. We'll need to go to Jin Ling."

Jiang Cheng scowled and pulled Sandu free of its sheath. Wei Wuxian tried to back up but ended up hitting his head against the table again.

"What are you doing?" he asked when Jiang Cheng didn't level the blade at him but instead turned it to the side and reached out to grab it.

"Using your blood method," Jiang Cheng said simply.

"No, no, no."

Wei Wuxian kicked Sandu up and away from Jiang Cheng's hand before he could slice it open.

"What the fuck?!"

"That takes too long to draw each time," Wei Wuxian explained as Jiang Cheng glared at him. "Sure, you have all the time you want to draw now, but if Jin Ling is really in trouble and you need out of there quickly, you're going to have to squeeze your arm for blood or take a few minutes to scratch at your skin. Either way, paper and brush are superior."

"But-"

"Plus," Wei Wuxian went on, "blood counts as yang energy. We don't need to feed the huli jing any more."

Though he still looked very frustrated, this seemed to settle it. Jiang Cheng sheathed Sandu again and turned on his heel to leave the room, leaving Wei Wuxian alone in the dark.

"Now what are you doing?" Wei Wuxian called after him.

"There's got to be paper somewhere in this place," Jiang Cheng said. His voice was distant, like he'd already made it most of the way down the hall. "If it takes too long to find it though, I'll be using blood."

Wei Wuxian sighed and got to his feet to follow him. "Do you even know where you're going?!"

"You're the one who can't remember anything worth a damn, not me!"

That was weird.

Not the insult, of course. That was expected. But Jiang Cheng sounded like he was farther away than he should have been. He must have recovered awfully quickly if he was running around already.

Wei Wuxian picked up his pace.

"Be careful," he called. "There's a lot of residual energy in this place. I think some of the arrays left by the Wens still remain."

"Oh really?" Jiang Cheng yelled back. "You mean that's why the palace hasn't been ransacked and all of these expensive items are still here on display? If only I had your deductive reasoning skills!"

"No need for sarcasm," Wei Wuxian said under his breath.

Something strange had happened again.

Jiang Cheng had moved off in an entirely different direction. So, Wei Wuxian felt along the wall for a corridor that might take him the same way, but there wasn't one.

Maybe he'd missed it? But he didn't think so. He'd removed Suibian from his belt, still sheathed, in order to drag it along one wall while he felt along the other since the hallway was too wide for his arms to span it.

All the turns he'd passed were on the other side. They would lead him away from wherever Jiang Cheng had gone.

Intricate patterns inlaid on the walls slipped past under his fingers a little too fast. It was as if the wall itself were moving, like some great scaly snake whose skin was made of wood and metal.

However, when Wei Wuxian halted abruptly, the wall stood as still as he did.

"Jiang Cheng?" he called into the darkness.

The hairs on his arms began to stand on end. He could sense a different energy around him, different than what he'd felt at the grand entrance of the palace. This was colder – malicious, even.

"Jiang Cheng?" he said again.

"Keep up!" came the answer from somewhere back the way he'd come. "There have got to be supplies around here somewhere. Why are there only hallways?!"

"I think we've activated a maze array," Wei Wuxian said. "Come back here. If we work together, it'll be easy to get rid of."

"Why don't you come over here?"

"I can't see! You took the light when you left! It's easier if you come to me!"

"Make your own light," Jiang Cheng retorted. "Isn't that what you always do?"

"Unbelievable. You're starting another fight."

Wei Wuxian smacked Suibian against the wall in frustration. He wondered again how it was that the storm gate had worked for him in the first place. There was no connection between them. They couldn't get along for more than a few moments.

"Tch. Meet in the middle," Jiang Cheng said. "That'll be faster anyway."

"There is no middle! Every time we move, the maze scrambles," Wei Wuxian said. "Our best chance is for one of us to stand still."

"You can always use your blood magic to come ov-"

"Seriously?!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed. "You're too proud to just come back to me? Why don't you ever-?"

Searing hot pain cut across his skin before he could finish telling Jiang Cheng off for being an ass. The miasma had given him only a moment to breathe before hitting him with another wave of torment debatably worse than the last.

He could hear Jiang Cheng saying his name, asking him what was wrong, but he couldn't find the air to answer between his screams. His flesh was boiling. The smell was horrific.

Wei Wuxian faltered and fell to his knees, clutching his chest and abdomen as if he could somehow keep himself from falling apart.

"Lan Zhan!" he heard himself cry, but it felt as though he were listening to someone else. "Lan Zhan, help!"

He was going to die again. He was sure of it.

The walls were spinning. He heard the wind call his name. The hands that gripped his shoulders were surely those of a local god, come to collect him and lead him to his trial before the ten magistrates…

No, that was silly. Had that been part of death, Wei Wuxian would have remembered it.

How was it that he'd been able to see the spinning walls in the first place? It had been so dark before. Where had this light come from?

It hurt too much to look at it. Wei Wuxian kept his eyes squeezed shut.

"All right, let me see your jade talisman," said a gruff voice overhead.

"Jiang Cheng?"

"Shut up and move your hands."

Wei Wuxian did as he'd asked just as another flash of white hot pain hit him. He screamed again.

Jiang Cheng clamped his hand over his mouth and pulled the jade talisman out from under his clothing.

"It's unharmed," he announced.

"HEEEEMMMMMM"

Jiang Cheng took his hand away. "What?"

"Help me!" Wei Wuxian said, reaching up to seize a fist full of Jiang Cheng's robes.

"How? What would you have me do?"

He could barely comprehend what Jiang Cheng had said to him. Last night's pain was nothing compared to now. It was all the pain of dying without the relief of actually ending up dead. Wei Wuxian writhed in the boiling heat, but no matter how he moved, it wouldn't let up.

"Water," he croaked.

Jiang Cheng fumbled with his pack. When he found his waterskin, he offered it to him, but Wei Wuxian just shook his head.

"You asked for water," Jiang Cheng said. "This is water. Stop being difficult."

"On me," Wei Wuxian said, "my skin…"

"You want me to dump it on you?"

Wei Wuxian nodded.

"That's such a waste! What if we need it later? This isn't even real-"

"Please!" Wei Wuxian cried. "Please, Jiang Cheng! I can't! I can't!"

"Fine."

Cool water washed over him. It soaked into his clothes and hair, reminding him that the heat was imagined - nothing more than a memory. He wasn't burning. He was okay.

His heart rate slowed. As he began to relax, his head lolled back and he realized that he was leaning against Jiang Cheng.

Fear gripped him, warning Wei Wuxian not to move or draw attention to their proximity.

But fear was rarely a strong enough deterrant for him.

"Did you…?" Wei Wuxian began, trailing off when he noted the frown that had formed on Jiang Cheng's face.

He followed his gaze to find Jiang Cheng's arm slick with blood. One of his daggers was lying on the floor near Wei Wuxian right next to a portrait that had likely been torn from the wall by the whirlwind.

"That's not possible," Jiang Cheng breathed. "It shouldn't have worked."

"Sure it should have!" Wei Wuxian said brightly, sitting up. "I asked for the water for a reason, didn't I?"

Naturally, his weak attempt to distract him hadn't worked. Jiang Cheng was still staring at his own arm in shock.

"The storm gate shouldn't have worked," he said.

"Well, it did," Wei Wuxian said. "Good thing too. This will make travel much more convenient for both of us. Don't worry, I won't read into it."

Jiang Cheng didn't respond and he didn't move. So, Wei Wuxian brushed himself off and reached into his robes, using the lantern light to see whether or not he had anything left on him that he could use to break the maze array. This wasn't going to be as easy as the array on Xinglu Ridge.

"Honestly," Wei Wuxian said as he gave up and decided to simply draw a counter array, "the storm gate probably only worked because we've been reminded of the past lately."

"Maybe," Jiang Cheng said quietly.

"I know that nothing has changed for us… not really. Stop fretting about it. It didn't mean anything."

"I know."

For some reason, despite everything he'd just said, Wei Wuxian's heart dropped a little to hear Jiang Cheng agree with him.

Goodness, they truly had been living in the past for too long!

"Come help me then," Wei Wuxian barked. "The sooner we finish this, the sooner we can find paper to take us to Jin Ling."

"Your blood method didn't take very long," Jiang Cheng said dully. "Why shouldn't I just use it again to find A-Ling?"

"Because I think it'll be worthwhile to suppress this array first."

"Why?"

Frustrated as he was that Jiang Cheng could never do anything without needing an explanation first, Wei Wuxian bit his tongue to keep himself from snapping. It was at least helpful that Jiang Cheng was willing to hear him out.

"We are outmatched," Wei Wuxian said.

Jiang Cheng scoffed, "You're giving too much cred-"

"Jin Guangyao has never been a particularly powerful cultivator," Wei Wuxian interrupted, "but he's always been very intelligent and perceptive. He has had a lot of time to amass the power he lacked previously. Now, he's intelligent, perceptive, and a powerful cultivator."

"Wait…" Jiang Cheng said slowly. "What did you just say?"

"Seriously?!" Wei Wuxian said. "You want me to repeat all of that?!"

"Jin Guangyao? Not Xue Yang?"

"Ah… yeah no. Not Xue Yang."

Jiang Cheng looked like he might just demolish every room in the palace. "I'm going to fucking kill him."

"I support the sentiment wholeheartedly," Wei Wuxian said, "but did you not hear anything else that I said?"

"Fine," Jiang Cheng snapped. "He's powerful. So what? There's only one of him. If we can-"

"He has power equivalent to an army."

"So do you if you'd just use your fucking flute."

There was more than a touch of envy in his reply.

Wei Wuxian chuckled, a little flattered. "I don't have the Yin Tiger Tally anymore. I destroyed it."

Jiang Cheng's eyebrows raised. "Really?"

He nodded.

"Still," Jiang Cheng said firmly, "you're not doing this alone. All of us together should be able to-"

"He's had months to kill people and steal their qi! Many of these towns weren't abandoned, they were slaughtered! Do you understand just how strong he is?"

"I'm not an idiot," Jiang Cheng snarled, "but we have no choice but to win. Leaving doesn't seem like an option. And besides, I'm not leaving until Jin Guangyao is dead… for good this time."

Such determination! Even more than he'd had when it had been Xue Yang they were up against.

Granted, Jiang Cheng had more of a personal vendetta against Jin Guangyao.

"You realize that this has nothing to do with us anymore," Wei Wuxian said. "Jin Guangyao only went after you before to keep up the illusion that I was his target. Although Xue Yang would probably have a bone to pick with me, I don't think I would be Jin Guangyao's main focus. Wouldn't you prefer to not be involved at all?"

"A little late to not be involved, wouldn't you say?"

"Maybe not. If this business doesn't involve you, it might be worthwhile to try to leave."

"I'm not going to put my tail between my legs and go home."

"Because you hate Jin Guangyao so much?"

"Because Jin Ling might be in danger. He might hold a grudge against him for taking over Jinlintai in his stead."

Wei Wuxian cocked an eyebrow. "You do remember what I told you about Huaisang, don't you? Most likely this is all a bid to get to him. Prove that you and Jin Ling are not useful as bait and I'm sure Jin Guangyao will let you leave. It saves him the extra effort of holding you here."

The corners of Jiang Cheng's mouth drew downward. He stared at the ground for a time, apparently thinking hard.

Then, he looked up and said, "What are you going to do?"

Wei Wuxian laughed drily. "Don't have much choice, do I? Zewu-jun is definitely trapped here since it's clear that Huaisang is still very attached to him. As such, I don't think Lan Zhan will be eager to leave… I'll be staying."

"Even if it weren't for Lan Wangji, I'm sure you would have stayed anyway," Jiang Cheng said quietly.

"Going to start a fight again over how I play hero when I should learn to stay out of other people's business?"

"No."

Wei Wuxian's curiosity piqued. "What are you going to do?"

"I'm sending Jin Ling home… and then I'm staying."

"Why?"

Jiang Cheng shrugged. "Maybe my grudge against Jin Guangyao runs deeper than I thought… Or maybe I'm trying to do something different... to follow different instincts. I don't know. What I do know is that I'm staying."

Was he simply afraid of being labelled a coward for leaving? Possibly, but it didn't seem like the right answer.

There was something in the creases on his forehead and the softness around his eyes, even as he looked off at nothing in particular, that made Wei Wuxian feel he was missing something.

"All right, then help me with the array," Wei Wuxian said, deciding that it wasn't worth it to ask any more follow-up questions. "If we're able to figure this out, we might be able to use the traps around the Scorching Sun Palace to help us in our fight or at least use this place to take refuge. I'm guessing a demon would have to use a lot of energy to try to break into this place if all of the old protections are still in effect."

"Hm," was all Jiang Cheng said in response, but he set about painting talismans on the floor as Wei Wuxian traced them on the wall.

They worked in silence and moved around one another with ease, each anticipating the other's next action as if they'd rehearsed it.

Soon, the set of talismans were in place and when activated together, they were strong enough to overpower the complicated maze array.

"Hm," was again all that Jiang Cheng had to say as they were released from their prison.

He then brushed himself off and made to proceed down the hallway, which was now complete with several offshoot rooms. Wei Wuxian held out an arm to catch him around the middle.

"What the-?"

"Here," Wei Wuxian said, handing him his waterskin. "You used a lot of yours on me."

"I used all of mine on you," Jiang Cheng corrected.

"All the more reason for you to take this."

"I don't want it."

Jiang Cheng pushed him aside and stalked off.

"Come on!" Wei Wuxian insisted, trotting after him. "You're going to make me feel bad!"

"What's there to feel bad about? I said I didn't want it."

"I'm sure you'll change your mind once this miasma has you spewing your breakfast onto the floor. Tends to make one thirsty, ya know?"

Jiang Cheng's eyes flashed with malice. He shoved Wei Wuxian hard enough to knock over a heavy chest of drawers.

"Who was the one who just vomited in the servants' quarters, huh?" Jiang Cheng hissed. "Tease me again and I'll have you missing last night's dinner too."

Wei Wuxian gulped. But, nervous as he was, he wasn't deterred.

"Doesn't all of this threatening me make your throat dry?" he asked as Jiang Cheng started searching desks and shelves for something with which to make his storm gate.

"Would you shut up and help me?!"

"Hmm," Wei Wuxian said, stroking his chin self-importantly.

Jiang Cheng was making a mess of every room they went into. If there were more traps – and Wei Wuxian was quite certain that there were – he was going to walk them straight into one. His desperation to get to his nephew was going to get them killed.

"Look," Wei Wuxian said with a sigh, dropping his efforts to annoy, "I have another arm. I'll carve another pattern."

Jiang Cheng scowled at him momentarily before going back to his ransacking. "I thought you said it was a bad idea?"

"Meh, if it's between taking a little risk or staying stuck in here forever with you, the choice is obvious."

"No need," Jiang Cheng said.

He revealed a brush and half a well of old ink attached to an inkstone.

"That looks dry," Wei Wuxian remarked, pointing at the ink.

"Use some of your water on it and I'll grind some more. There are ink sticks in there."

"Uhhh…"

Jiang Cheng squinted at him. "What's wrong?"

"Now that I think of it…" Wei Wuxian said slowly, rattling his waterskin. "I uhhh…"

"It's not water, is it?"

"No."

"Damn you, Wei Wuxian."

"Mind your business, Jiang Cheng."

"Use it anyway. It might still work."

Wei Wuxian obliged, dumping a little bit of the wine he'd stashed into the well. Sure enough, the ink was made usable, if a little lighter in color than it had been originally.

While Jiang Cheng worked to grind the ink, Wei Wuxian discreetly worked on something else. He sliced open his hand with Suibian and painted most of a talisman on the side of his robe. It was a failsafe more than anything. All he'd have to do was add a single line to it and he could activate it. Jin Guangyao surely wasn't going to fall for Wei Wuxian's drawing behind the back trick twice.

Once he'd made enough ink, Jiang Cheng dipped the brush and began painting. Three concentric circles bound together by a slew of jagged lines and a softer pattern, almost reminiscent of petals. Wei Wuxian had never paid much attention to the mandalas Jiang Cheng created. He found now that he quite liked them.

"You've got to be joking," Jiang Cheng murmured.

"About what? I didn't say-"

Wei Wuxian cut off abruptly as Jiang Cheng's brush hand dropped dead on the table and he swayed on his feet. It was hard to know whether he should try to help him or not.

"If he's so powerful," Jiang Cheng said weakly, "then why does he have to keep draining me?"

He still hadn't made a decision on helping when Jiang Cheng crashed into the desk and slid off onto the floor.

"Well, on the bright side," Wei Wuxian said, picking up the brush and starting a pattern of his own on the desk, "he's obviously not going to kill you or he would have done so already. So, this works out for me. I was trying to figure out how to tell you that you needed to stay here anyway."

"What?"

"You didn't really think we could both leave our new base, did you?" Wei Wuxian asked. "Tisk tisk. What if we couldn't find it again in the fog?"

"But-"

"Now don't worry yourself, Sect Leader Jiang. I'll be very careful and I'll teleport straight back here if the water gets too hot."

"I hope you fucking boil," Jiang Cheng spat.

"I bet you do."

Wei Wuxian tossed his waterskin over his shoulder to him as he continued to draw. He was struggling to let the lines mesmerize him while still trading words with Jiang Cheng.

"I said I didn't want this," Jiang Cheng said. "And I definitely don't want it now that I know it's not even water."

"It's better than water!"

"I don't-"

"I don't care," Wei Wuxian cut him off. "Drink it or don't, but I'm not taking it back. I'll see you again soon."

"Tch."

Finally, with their conversation at a close, the storm gate opened. Howling winds and the shrieking of the old chains of the hanging lanterns above split the silence of the hallway.

"You had better go to Jin Ling first!" he heard Jiang Cheng bellow over the cacophony. "If I hear later that you sought out Lan Wangji before him, I swear-"

"Consider my legs safe," Wei Wuxian called back at him. "Like I said, don't worry yourself!"