Hello Friends! I'm alive! Turns out going to school full time, working full time, moving, and writing a thesis all at the same time does not make for a fun time! But things are kind of calming down for the moment and I found the time to finish this chapter! I've been working on this for months off and on and just never was able to get it quite right? Anyways I kind of just accepted that my writing is very minimalistic in this chapter and that is just how it is going to be. I think it's no secret that scene description is not my strong suit! Anyways, I hope you can still enjoy it and haven't given up on me because I have definitely not given up on this story!

Also the chapter title comes from My Tears Ricochet by Taylor Swift. I not only love that song for it's artistry but I feel it also really shows how Addie is feeling in this chapter! We love a good Tay reference so there you go!

Warning at end of chapter.

New world

"Captain they're boarding!"

"Fire all cannons! Fight them back do not let them-"

CRASH

He was cut off by a deafening clap of thunder and blinding flash of lighting. I blinked hard against the raging wind and stared up in horror as the top sail caught fire. The lightning had struck the main mast and fueled by the wind set the entire top half of it ablaze.

"Captain the mast!" I shouted while dodging several attackers.

"Deal with it! I'm a little busy at the moment!" He shouted back as he parried four swords at once while also ducking a gun shot.

My head whipped between the rapidly growing fire and the seemingly endless amount of enemies pouring onto the deck of our ship. No less than 5 lesser known pirate crews in the New World had banded together in an attempt to take us out. While we definitely outclassed them in terms of individual strength the sheer numbers they had on their side ensured a tough fight. Paired with the sudden storm that brought rogue waves, water spouts, gale force winds, thunder, and lightning, but no rain. Which almost felt as if the sky and sea were in a battle to see who would sink us first. Would the waves crush our ship and drag us into the deep? Or would the lightning burn us all to a crisp?

"Addie the fire!" Someone shouted.

With that choice made for me I leap over bodies and shoved against others as I raced toward the rigging. I quickly started climbing and was forced to fight past several attackers as I raced against the still growing fire. Just as I made it to the yard a hulking figure draped in front of me.

They raised a sword and smirked as they said, "I've waited a long time to meet you, Siren."

"Do shut up. And get out of my way would you? I kind of have something to take care of."

He swung his sword down at me and I quickly raised my leg to catch the sword with my heel. Using the leverage from that I whipped myself around and kicked him in the side of the head with my other leg. I didn't watch as he fell towards the deck and instead returned my attention to the fire threatening to consume my entire ship.

"For fuck's sake you'd think we went through a war."

"We might as well have. How many of those fuckers were there? 300? 400?"

"Yeah and they weren't all push overs either."

"Oh well, they all died the same."

"But not before doing a hell of a lot of damage." Max said.

"What's the deal Max, what do we need in terms of repairs?" Shanks asked.

Max shook his head and dropped a piece of wood to the deck before slowly turning to face us. He looked at all of us before saying, "The Brat's getting tired Boss."

"What does that mean?"

"It means she's more patches and holes than ship at this point. I don't know how much longer I can keep her together."

We all fell silent as we processed exactly what our Shipwright was saying. We looked at one another in stunned silence before Shanks finally broke it.

"Well, I guess it's time to pay Iceburg a visit then."

After a short stop at a small cluster of Hustle Muscle Mangrove trees that formed an archipelago a fraction of the size of Sabaody the Brat was coated and we easily passed through Fishman island. We did catch a few glares when we docked in Whitebeard's territory but no one seemed to be feeling brave enough to try and stop us as we meant no trouble (that time at least).

Then it was while we were making our way back up to the surface I hefted a backpack onto my shoulder and went to meet with Shanks on deck. I found him leaning on the railing talking with Beckman and Yasopp. Walking up to him I said, "Hey Boss, there's someone I need to go see. Do you mind if I go take care of that and meet up with you guys on Water 7?"

"Water 7 is still a few days off, you sure you need that long?" He asked.

"If possible. Don't worry, I won't get into any trouble."

"I highly doubt that, but sure. Just be careful Ads."

"I will be. Thanks though, I'll see you guys in a few days."

All three waved to me as I stepped up onto the railing and dove through the coating and into the sea.

Cobblestone streets that had been rebuilt hundreds of times to the point that the once orderly town was now a maze of side streets with seemingly no rhyme or reason. The equally aged buildings loomed on either side of the narrow streets, in another town they may be in danger of collapsing, but not here. Here, the buildings were built just as solid as the soldiers that still called them home. As I walked through the streets of Marineford I gazed up at the buildings, but didn't have to crane my neck quite as far to make out the roof tops. The streets felt more cramped, the stones more uneven, the town smaller than the image I always conjured when I thought of "home". But finally after trying to get lost, yet still not managing to take a single wrong turn, I stared up at the building that has marked its place so deep in my heart that the sight of it caused to ache while also soothing a wound that has burned for so long I no longer dared to acknowledge it. I gazed up at the smooth gray stone and fern green roof and took a deep breath as the flood of memories came rushing in.

But before I could allow myself to spiral into memories I stepped up to the door and tried the knob. It turned, hardly anyone bothers to lock their doors here, and swung open. Then standing in the doorway of a home I never thought I would see again I gazed into the entryway and made my way over to the shoe cabinet on the right. I slid open the door and felt my smile dim. The small cabinet that once was stuffed beyond the point of any organization with the shoes of all four of the home's occupants now sat empty, stripped bare of all the promise of life it once held.

Undeterred, I unlaced my boots and placed them on the right hand corner of the top shelf, just as I always had, and slid the door shut. I made my way through the secondary entrance door and moved on to the living room. Unlike the shoe cabinet this room is exactly as I remember it. The furniture is all the same and still sits in the same places. Should I wish too, I knew that I could navigate the room with my eyes shut and not even stub a toe. But instead I walked over to the couch and picked up the large white blanket that sat folded along the back of it. I let out a breath bordering on a sob as I touched the soft fabric and couldn't help but press it to my face to breathe in the familiar scent of home.

After taking a moment to breathe in the blanket, I wrapped it around my shoulders before heading down the hallway on the left of the room. Only a few steps away from the living room is another door. I hesitated as I reached for the shiny door knob that is suddenly far lower than I ever remember it being. I forced myself to take a deep breath, tightened the blanket around my shoulders, grasped the knob, clenched my eyes shut, turned the knob, and let the door swing open. When I hear it dully clunk against the wall I open my eyes and let out a sob at the mess of papers, scattered clothes, and unmade bed that was once my bedroom. There are hundred of pages of sheet music, some handwritten and some printed, scattered across the desk sitting against the right wall as well as the floor, the bed remains a tangled mess of far more blankets than a little girl could possibly need, the clothes hamper is still overflowing with uniforms waiting to be washed, but despite the chaotic mess the deep chestnut brown violin still sits reverently placed on its stand next to the head of the bed.

I forced myself to take a step into the room, taking care not to step on any of the papers or clothes lest I disturb this tomb of happier days, as I walked towards the violin. My heart breaks for the abandoned instrument as I raise my hand to brush away some of the dust that has settled on it. But the moment my fingers touched the polished wood the spell breaks and I fall to my knees crying.

I buried my face in the corners of the blanket that is two sizes smaller than it once was and allowed myself to sob.

I don't know how long I sat there but eventually my head snapped up as I heard papers crinkling and a little bell tinkling. I looked up to see a small white goat with a bell around its neck eating a piece of paper.

I sniffled sadly before I said, "You know you aren't allowed in here, Adzuki."

Instead of responding the goat just bahhs before butting his head against my knees. I feel a smile start to grow on my face and I reach out a hand to pet him.

I gently squished his cheeks and kissed his forehead as I said, "You just eat all my sheet music so you can't be in here. But if you're here then grandpa can't be too far away. Come on, I bet he has something better for you to eat."

I stood and patted my hip for him to follow me as I walked out of the room. After making sure that the door to my room was closed I turned to walk towards the kitchen where I could hear someone shuffling around. Walking into the room I see an abnormally tall man with an equally abnormal afro standing at the stove stirring a pot. Adzuki pranced ahead of me to rub his head against the man's leg as I stood frozen in the doorway.

"You know you shouldn't be here." He said without looking up from the pot.

"Why? You don't want to see me? It's been almost a decade, surely you missed me at least a little."

"Whether or not I missed you isn't the point. You're a wanted criminal, you can't just walk into Marine HQ."

"Well I would say I snuck more than walked but-"

"Admi." He interrupted me with a sigh. "What are you doing here?"

I shrugged before saying, "Like I said, it's been 9 years and I was in the area so I thought I'd stop by and say hi."

He sighed again before pointing at the table and saying, "Sit. I'm almost done making lunch."

"So what's Sera up to these days? I half expected to see her here." I said after he had set down two bowls of soup.

"Her assignment is classified. But she does have her own ship to command and spends most of her time there. She only comes by to visit now."

"So then why did you keep the house? I thought you only moved in here because of Sera and I."

"You'll understand when you're older."

"I'm not as naive as I look."

"No. But you don't know what it's like to lose your children."

I paused at that before nodding and saying, "Still doesn't feel like he's been gone 9 years."

He sighed heavily before leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. Then he said, "Why did you come here today, Ariadne? Don't try and tell me it was just because you were in the area."

I smiled weakly at that and said, "Should have known you wouldn't buy that. But I've done a lot of thinking in the last few years. About my parents, my past, the things I've done, and the people I care about. Sailing with Shanks and the others taught me that people can actually care about me and I guess I wanted to see if that was the case with you. You are one of the few people I consider family after all."

"You should have known that you were still my granddaughter no matter what."

"That's been a hard thing to accept since… Since I left."

"You aren't just talking about the things you've done are you?"

I stared vacantly at the table and slowly shook my head. "This is a man's world and a little girl has no place on a pirate ship. So, it's hard to believe that you could ever matter to someone after being treated like you're worthless."

"You weren't worthless here."

"No, I wasn't. I could have been great, if I'd stayed. But I- I can't bring myself to regret leaving now after I've found my crew. Because if I never left home then I never would have found them, and a life without my crew isn't one I want to live."

He nodded solemnly and said, "You were smart to choose Shanks to sail with."

"Why?"

"Several reasons."

"Which are?"

"Above my pay grade."

I paused before saying, "Do they have to do with my bounty? Why I'm only wanted alive?"

"I was the one to originally push for that. But then you caught the eye of someone higher up and then the reason changed."

"What? Do you mean Kong?"

"Higher." He said as he stared at me with a grave expression. "You need to watch your back, Ariadne. You aren't a little girl playing pirate, not anymore. They will come for you."

"Who?"

"I can't say. But I'll do what little I can to give you time but beyond that all I can offer you is the possibility of a chance."

"What do you mean?"

"There's nothing I can do to guarantee your safety. Not anymore. But there is a chance that if you work with us then something can be worked out."

"I'm not a Marine."

"Exactly. Garp and I are working on something. Something outside the Marines. We could use someone like you."

"My loyalty is to my crew."

"For now."

"What the hell does that mean?" I shouted pushing back from the table to stand.

"You were loyal to the Marines once."

I started to pace across the room with my arm tightly crossed over my chest as I shouted. "I was a child, I didn't have a choice! Do you think I-"

"Calm down Ariadne. I know all about your birth father and his deal with Whitebeard."

"If you know that then why are you talking about me like I'm some disloyal fool?"

He narrowed his eyes as he said, "That's something I've always wanted to ask you about, you know."

"What?" I snapped, finally coming to a halt across the table from him.

"You left Whitebeard's ship when you were 14 but you chose to go to Big Mom instead of coming to us, instead of coming home. Why?"

I hesitated. "I- I don't know. I was scared, I was hurt, I was angry. I thought…"

"What?"

"I thought you wouldn't want me back after what I had become."

"You were a child."

"And the daughter of Silvers Rayleigh."

He paused and his mouth tightened. "You. Are the daughter of Donquixote Rosinante. Just as he is my son, you are my granddaughter."

I stared at him in stunned silence for a minute at that. Finally I asked, "You still think that?"

"I heard you scream yourself awake from night terrors too many times to think otherwise."

"Thank you."

"But I'm afraid that doesn't change the fact that you are a pirate and I am a Marine. You can never come back here, Admi." He said as he pushed back from the table and stood.

"I know."

He nodded before turning and walking out of the room. I heard his footsteps carry him down the hallway and vaguely heard a door open, then close. When he walked back into the room I saw that he was carrying a black hard case in one hand and my violin in the other. He gently laid it on the table and my hands shook as I reached out to pick it up gingerly and turned over to see if the engraving was still on the back. I felt a sob rise in my throat as I ran my fingers over the deep grooves that read "for Ariadne".

"He loved you." He said. "He loved the three of you more than anything."

"Why did you keep this? Why did you keep everything? Why didn't you-" My voice cracked and died in my throat as I looked up at him as my eyes started to blur with tears.

He was quiet for a long moment before he said, "I lost my only son, and my youngest granddaughter. I couldn't lose anymore of my family."

"You didn't lose me grandpa I just-"

"You can't come back here, Ariadne. You choose your path in life, now you have to see it through. I won't arrest you today, but next time… I'm a Marine."

I nodded. "I understand. And I'm sorry, I wish things could be different."

I gently laid the violin in the velvet lined case and locked it before turning and walking towards the door.

"Take it." He said.

"But you said you wanted to keep it."

"Rosi got it for you. It belongs with you."

I nodded and picked up the instrument.

"Bye grandpa. I'll miss you." I said before I walked out of the room and then out of the house that had been the kindest home I had ever known.

"Well you certainly don't belong here." A voice said as I was walking through the narrow streets once again.

I looked up to see Kuzan standing in front of me. "Hey Kozy, Sengoku already knows I'm here so I doubt you'll get in trouble for letting me go."

He shrugged. "I wasn't really concerned about that anyways. We both know I could bring you down whenever I wanted."

I laughed. "Sure, 10 years ago. But maybe I've grown so strong since we last saw each other that I could actually beat you."

"Maybe. But we both know that'll never happen, Admi."

I laughed again. "Maybe. But you're what 11 years older than me? I think we both know that gives you an unfair advantage."

"Right it's the age gap and not the huge differences in our skill levels. Or the fact that your Devil Fruit does nothing but strengthen my own."

"Obviously. But I'll forgive you for being a cheat if you tell me something. Sengoku was talking about something and I'm wondering if you know more?"

"Possibly, but if he didn't talk about it I won't."

"He said that there was someone above Kong who was responsible for my bounty being only alive. Who above him would even care about me?"

"That I don't know. But then again, you were always chummier with those people than anyone else I know."

"Who? Do you mean the Dragons? There is no way…"

"Weren't you always running around with that one kid?"

"Duny? Sure, but we haven't spoken in years."

"True, but neither have we yet here we are."

"I suppose." I said before pausing. "Could you get me up there?"

" Of course not. Why the hell would I help a wanted criminal sneak into the Holy Land?"

"Because I would consider it a personal favor?"

"No. I enjoy not being court martialed for treason, thank you very much."

"Damn. Well how about Enies Lobby? Can you give me a ride there?"

"What business could you possibly have at our main judicial island?" He asked as he stared at me with narrowed eyes.

I shrugged.

"Alright, fine. We leave in the morning but you better put on a Marine uniform and not let anyone find out who you really are. If you do then I'm throwing your ass in the brig."

"Fair enough. Thanks Kozy!" I said as I started to skip past him.

"Hey hold on." He called after me. When I turned to look back at him he said, "Have you gone to see Garp yet?"

"No. Of course not. He's not here right now I made sure to- Besides, that's- there's nothing to say."

"He still talks about you, you know. From time to time."

"He talks about what could of been. If I hadn't-"

"Hadn't what?"

"Betrayed him."

"Well I can't speak for you or him but I sincerely doubt he sees you as a traitor. Some others here, definitely. But not him."

"Thank you. But I'd rather avoid finding a definite answer to that question."

"Suit yourself." He said with a shrug before turning to walk away.

Warnings:

No chapter warnings apply.

SHE'S DONE! I do love finally getting to explore Addie's backstory and her relationships from that time but it is one hell of a slog to get there (or maybe it just feels that way for me?) Anyways! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please let me know if you enjoyed it or have any questions, suggestions, or criticisms!

Also a fun note but Adzuki means Red Bean. The girls named him that because he is as cute as a little bean. Not sure if it will be covered in my fics but Adzuki was a present given to Addie and Sera by Rosi after their dog died. But the little bastard decided that he liked Sengoku better and always stayed with him instead! He probably did because Sengoku lets him eat lots of yummy paper? Pretty sure you aren't supposed to feed goats paper but oh well!