Authors note: okay so, originally the plan was to go one chapter for each thing. like, a chapter for the memory. one for confronting the aspect, and then a chapter see dedicated to whats going on outside cardins mind.
But, I've realised these confrontation chapters would be like... 10,000 or so words if i did that. maybe more. so, I'll be splitting the confrontation chapters into multiple parts. with each part featuring a specific location within that version of the mind realm.
Being in this distorted version of his own memory, it deeply disturbed him. The now older Cardin didn't want to believe he was here, but no matter how many times he blinked or closed his eyes. When opening them, he found he was still right here. In this foggy, blood stained perception of the street from his memory. In fact, maybe it was more accurate to say it was a recreation of vale from the time period of that memory? Some of the shops he saw, they'd shut down years ago. Though some things were very out of place, for some reason he could see the vale general hospital in the distance. But… that should've been on the other side of the city, he shouldn't be able to see it at all.
Even weirder was what he saw as he walked down the eerie abandoned street, he saw a psychiatric ward. The Oum mental health ward, but. It didn't make sense that it was there, that building wasn't even in vale. It was in atlas, so… why was he suddenly seeing it again here? Nothing about this made any sense, everything was warped and distorted in a twisted way. It was disorienting, he could feel his head start to ache from trying to understand everything. Despite his apprehension though, he found himself standing at the door to that ward. Reaching out to grasp and twist the doorknob, before stepping inside. The low buzzing of the lights filling his ears, yet even this building was completely empty. Blood stained the walls, walls that almost seemed like they were… breathing. The odd feeling of being watched filled him with dread, a foot moving forward towards the reception desk. A disgustingly wet squelching sound following each step he took, as if he were walking atop a mound of flesh.
Upon arriving at the reception desk, Cardin found a note. Instinctively picking it up so he could read it over, finding that it was a prescription document from a doctor. Prescribing the patient in question with multiple medications, Citalopram and Sertraline. Both antidepressants, whoever was prescribed them must have gone through quite the event. To need this much medication, especially of two differing types. Maybe one was a backup? In case they had negative reactions to the first medication? Either way, he noticed the initials of the patient on the document. C.W, two simple initials. Yet something in the back of cardins mind told him they were important, and that he should keep a mental note of that. Once he was done reading, he placed the document down on the desk. Grabbing a secondary item from the desk, that being a simple lighter. It wasn't much, but it'd work as a light source in a pinch.
With the standard Zippo lighter held in his hand, the bully began making his way deeper into the psychiatric ward. Nothing really seemed to be happening, yet the growing pit of dread in his stomach grew the more he walked. Nobody was around, he couldn't even hear any noises to showcase any signs of life. Outside of the squelching of the floor that is, the only real signs of life. Were the sounds of his own unsettled briefing, the rapidly increasing beating of his heart ringing in his ears now. Only growing more intense when he arrived at a simple room, containing a single lever. Text scrawled on the wall using some kind of black oozing ink, he didn't know who or what wrote it. Because it certainly wasn't him, but the text itself terrified him. As simple as it was.
'Are you afraid of the dark?' That one question wouldn't have been anywhere near as frightening if it wasn't positioned by this lever, but the fact it was… made it all the more eerie. Worse yet, as Cardin looked around the room to find any way to avoid that lever. He found one item, sat upon a shelf that made the pit in his stomach drop infinitely deeper. A switchblade, a weapon… something that shouldn't be in a place like this. Or should he say, wouldn't be placed here… without any significant reason. As such, Cardin picked up the switchblade and flicked out the knife. Holding it tightly in his left hand, turning to look at that eerie lever. Grasping it with his right hand, before finally pulling it down.
All too quickly the formerly lit up building was bathed in complete darkness, on its own that wouldn't have been so bad. But Cardin could hear something, distant yet still very much there. Groans of pain, wailing, terror filled screaming. All of it filling his ears, as distant as it may have been. The bully pulled that Zippo lighter from his pocket, before lighting it. That soothing orange light bathed the area in its warmth, but in doing so it made Cardin notice something. Almost doing a double take because of it, the once undulating breathing walls… now lay still as if they'd returned to normal stone. Even the floor, which had once squelched like meat. Now simply resounded with the audible sound of someone walking on stone, he couldn't believe it. He was absolutely certain that the ground had been like meat before, that the walls had been breathing and watching him. Or perhaps they never were? Maybe something was going on with his mind, none of this made any sense after all.
"So my mind is playing tricks on me then… that's what's happening?" For the first time since arriving in his own mind, present Cardin spoke. Yet found himself shocked, his voice didn't come out as brashly as it used to. Instead he just sounded… defeated and alone, that melancholic tone from his narrator self oozing into his voice. Cracks in his act of bravado began to form, he was vulnerable and weak in his own mind… and the real cardin began to leak to the surface. Melancholic, alone, defeated and almost angry at the sorry state he found himself in. But he couldn't let himself just curl here and surrender here, he can't let his mind get the best of him. So, he stepped out of the power room. Beginning to walk once more, a previously closed metal door now being wide open. The door to the treatment offices, where patients could talk with their doctors about things.
As Cardin walked down that all too familiar hall of treatment rooms, he was suddenly hit with the overwhelming sense of being watched. Turning suddenly to look back down the way he came, finding that the doors had closed behind him. A dark silhouette of a figure standing behind the door, visible through a small glass section. Before they quickly left, slipping completely out of view. This left Cardin completely alone once more, or at least… he thought he was alone. When he turned back around he suddenly found himself face to face with a creature that quickly lunged at him, Cardin slipping back and kicking the thing in the knee to knock it back a bit.
"What… the fuck are you?" Cardins melancholic voice asked, talking to himself really as he looked at the creature. It looked human, but it was also heavily disfigured and distorted. Appearing like a person wearing a straight jacket, with a bloody face… but it almost looked like it had three heads fused together. Making one amalgamation of a head, shifting to different faces at certain points. Worst of it all, the faces looked so familiar. But he couldn't quite place where he'd seen them before, he couldn't really remember them clearly either. The creature's faces almost seeming, smudged. As if they were out of focus, is this his mind telling him the faces are unimportant? Or did he just not remember them enough to give them detail? He didn't get much longer to think, the creature rising again. Spasming and twitching rapidly, almost making its body seem to warp and distort from it all. Cardin didn't give it time to lunge again, quickly lunging forward himself to plunge his switchblade into the creature's head. Twisting and wrenching the blade to cause as much damage as possible, before ripping the blade out. Jumping back to avoid a swing from the creature, which seemed to reach out to him a bit. Its arms almost made Cardin wretch and barf on the spot, its forearms were fused with three others. All ending in a disfigured bloody hand, making it seem almost like three people were reaching out to him.
"Help… me… 'ease" three distorted voices came from the creature at once, begging for help as it seemed to wail and cry in agony and pain. Body spasming and writhing, before all motion just halted. The creature's eyes leaked blood, as it toppled forward to the ground. Leaving Cardin staring at the body, revolted by the appearance of the creature. Yet also feeling sorry for what he'd done, keeping his eyes on the deceased creature.
"You can rest now, I'm… I'm so sorry" that's all Cardin could say, a tinge of grief and sadness filling his voice. A singular tear rolled down from his right eye, a small bit of emotion to show he cared about what he was doing here. Cardin would have walked on, but he didn't get that chance. Door after door bursting open, as creatures just like the one he'd just put down came pouring out into the hall. Distorted cries for help filling the psychiatric ward, and all Cardin could do in that situation… was run. Feet audibly smacking against the ground as he ran, slipping his way past the creatures as best as he could. Knocking over chairs, vases, bookshelves. Anything he could to stop the advance of the overwhelming sea of those creatures, all he had was a switchblade after all. No way he could face a horde like that, Cardin seeing a door at the end of the hall. Leading to the head doctors office, but before Cardin could make it there he felt a weight on his back. Finding himself knocked to the floor, his knife clattering to the floor since he dropped it due to the sudden impact. His lighter also hit the floor, skidding across it towards the door.
Cardin frantically went to reach for the switchblade, using his right foot to kick at the creature currently grasping onto him. Before he suddenly felt a searing pain, letting out a cry from it. Glancing down to see the creature had taken a bite out of his calf, tearing a chunk of meat from it. Blood oozing intensely from the wound, Cardin finally getting the knife and slamming it down to stab the creature's head. Kicking its body off of himself, quickly getting back to his feet and sort of painfully running to the door. An injured limping run, but anything he could do to live would be great. Cardin slammed through the door, immediately closing and locking it. Barricading it with everything he found in the room, that was heavy enough to work. Only being able to see thanks to the window in the room, the lighter having been left behind after the scuffle.
"Fuck… is my own mind trying to kill me? I need to get out of here" he spoke to himself again, using his switchblade to tear some fabric from his jacket. Lifting the leg of his pants to look at his wound, wincing as he began to wrap the fabric around his leg like a bandage. Glancing over at the window, heading over to it before opening it. Planning to climb out the window, to get back to street level. But before he could do so, he felt a stinging pain in his head. a voice ringing out as images of this very doctors office played in his mind, showing someone sitting down to converse with the doctor.
"Doc I know you're trying to help me, I know you are. But, are you sure these meds are good for me? Every time I take them I feel so... happy, for about an hour. But when they wear off I, I don't feel anything. Can't I just come in for the therapy as normal? Why do I have to take these? I know they're meant to help me, but it feels like they're... sapping away at my emotions. Stopping me from feeling anything" The voice was deep, heavily muffled to the point he couldn't tell who it was. But they sounded so, desperate. Practically beginning this doctor to take them off these meds, he couldn't imagine it. What it'd be like, slowly taking these meds every day. Until you just don't feel anymore, it would make you feel less than human.
But before he could hear the doctors response, the pain in his head faded and the voices disappeared. He didn't know why he heard that voice, or why it was seemingly so significant to him. But he knew where he needed to go at least, he needs to go to the hospital. It was calling to him, drawing him towards it.
So that's exactly where he'd go, next stop. Hospital.