This week's chapter is more Randler-focused. I love Chandler and Rachel's friendship, and there are so few moments of just the two of them in the show.

"I love you."

The words from that morning kept ringing in Chandler's ears. They were not unusual for him to say to Monica, so why had they felt different this time? After hours of trying to find an explanation, he could only come up with one response. One he didn't want to consider: one that would change everything between them, probably for worse.

He couldn't be in love with her, could he? No. She was just Monica, his best friend. Wasn't she? But Chandler could deny it as much as he wanted: she was more than that. And after a few hours of trying to deny his sudden realization, everything started to make sense. Perhaps he couldn't call it love, at least not yet, but he had developed stronger feelings for his best friend.

But when had it happened? Was there even an exact moment Chandler could pinpoint as the moment he'd started having those feelings for Monica? Not exactly. It just happened over time. After all, he'd always had a crush on Monica: remnants of the feelings he'd first had for her when he was much younger. He'd always thought those feelings were armless. But they weren't. They grew and developed into something bigger, and Chandler hadn't even noticed it happening.

That explained why he'd slept with Monica that night. Perhaps he had been so drunk that those deeply rooted feelings surfaced, and he wasn't able to control them. But what had he said to her? Had he proffered his feelings for her? Panic started to take control of his body.

No, he couldn't. He knew Monica well enough to know that if she'd heard something like that, she wouldn't let it go, and she would never have pretended for so long that that night didn't happen. Besides, that morning, Chandler noticed she'd also noticed the words that slipped out of his mind had a deeper meaning behind them than usual. But she hadn't said anything about it. Could it be because Monica was still mad at him? Could she be feeling the same about him? After all, she had been conscious enough that night and still agreed to sleep with him.

Chandler's recent discovery also explained why he'd felt that sudden pang of sadness the previous day at the fountain when he observed the happy family. He wanted that with Monica. He wanted to be in a relationship with her. But it wasn't that easy.

The babies would change everything. Chandler had promised he would never abandon her and intended to keep that promise, even if Monica was mad at him and ignored him. What would happen if they started a relationship? Would they last? If they broke up and things got ugly between them, would they be able to tolerate each other for the sake of the babies, or would their kids grow up as he did, with parents who despised each other? But if they didn't, would he be able to commit himself to a long-lasting relationship with Monica?

Desperate by the sudden cloud of doubts that entered his mind, Chandler ran his hands down his face in an attempt to control his thoughts.

"What have I gotten myself into?" He whispered to himself, to the four walls of his empty office.

When the work day ended, the gang gathered Central Perk in their usual spot on the orange couch. But the tension between the two friends was almost palpable. Just like that morning, Monica hadn't spoken directly at Chandler. And Chandler didn't direct his words at Monica either, still dwelling on his confession from that morning. Trying to avoid a discussion that would involve everyone else, Chandler tried to act as naturally as possible while the conversation developed around him. If everyone else noticed, no one said anything about it.

A while after, already alone in his apartment, Chandler sat in front of the TV, still unable to fully process everything he'd realized that day. But his thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the loud sound of the door slamming shut and someone's fast pacing into the apartment.

"Your date went that bad, Joey?" He asked, thinking it had been Joey who entered the apartment.

"I'm not Joey."

Chandler turned back, surprised to see his neighbor standing in front of him, her look sharp and determined. He knew that look. The conversation would end poorly for him.

"Hi, Rach," He started, trying to cover his sudden nervousness. "Do you need something from us?"

Rachel wasn't affected by his attempt at stalling.

"What happened with you and Monica?" Rachel inquired. Well, one person had noticed their silent quarrel.

"Nothing," Chandler answered to see if Rachel dropped the matter.

"That's a lie. Monica's clearly mad at you and won't tell me anything. And since she doesn't talk, you will," Rachel insisted.

"What makes you say Monica's mad at me?" Chandler asked, already about to give up his act.

"Stop the bullshit, Chandler. You two are acting weird around each other today. Something is going on. What happened?"

"I… We had a disagreement about a minor thing that happened. That's all," Chandler opted to answer with a vague half-truth.

"It doesn't look like something minor. What really happened?" Rachel insisted.

"I can't tell you about it," Chandler sighed. Not that he didn't want to. He wanted more than anything to talk to someone about everything that was inside his head.

"Why not? Why is it such a secret that you and Monica can't tell me about it?"

The longer Rachel pushed the matter, the less was Chandler's will to resist. Eventually, he decided to speak to Rachel, although he only told her part of what was happening.

"I really can't tell you, Rach. But I need you to know that I never intended this to happen. I would never do something purposely to leave Monica mad at me," He replied softly.

Rachel seemed to calm down.

"I believe you. I know you would never do anything bad to Monica. But whatever it is, you need to fix it," she added in a calmer tone. "The stress she's under right now is not good for the baby."

"I know," Chandler said. "After our fight yesterday, I thought about what I said and realized I was an asshole. I never meant to hurt Monica. And I tried to apologize this morning, but she didn't accept it," He vented, forgetting for a moment that his friend didn't know about their fight. Or at least, he thought.

"Yesterday? Did you have a fight with Monica yesterday? She didn't tell me about a fight with you. She only spoke to me about her discussion with…

Something flashed across Rachel's face, and her eyes popped out in the most shocked expression Chandler had ever seen.

"No way!" She exclaimed, covering her mouth with her hands.

Panic spread through Chandler's body. Their secret had been found.

A few seconds passed, and Rachel seemed to calm down.

"There's no guy from Monica's work, is it?" She asked calmly, in a firm tone that indicated she already knew the answer.

There was no point in denying it now.

"No. There's no guy from work," Chandler answered honestly.

"Holy shit! This is huge! Why are you guys hiding this from us? Aren't you freaking out? How did this happen? For how long are you guys together?" Rachel asked, still incredulous.

"I… I only found out about all this yesterday. It's Monica's secret to keep, and she'll tell everyone when she's ready," Chandler started. "I think you know how it happened, and we're not together. And I freaking out was the reason for our fight."

Rachel looked at him, trying to grasp all the information revealed in the last thirty seconds.

"I think you should start by the beginning."

And so, Chandler did it, feeling relieved to have someone he trusted to talk about everything that happened in the past 24 hours.

"I don't want to see her like that, Rach. But I already tried to apologize. What should I do?"

"Well… Monica said she wanted space, so you should give her space. Let her cool down; she'll eventually see how much you regret everything. Then, she'll see how much you are willing to grow up for this, and she'll be grateful, I promise." Rachel assured him with a confident smile.

But Chandler wasn't convinced.

"What if she never realizes it? What if she doesn't want to talk to me anymore? Especially after this morning…"

"This morning? Didn't you apologize this morning? Why wouldn't she want to talk to you after that? What are you not telling me?" Rachel inquired again suspiciously.

Fuck. Chandler should really filter his words before they come out of his mouth. There was no way to avoid answering the question.

"I…" He started shyly. After all, it was a big confession to make even to himself, much less to someone else. "I told her I loved her."

Silence filled the room.

"You told her you love her as a friend or…" Rachel spoke, trying to find an answer to another unneeded question.

"I don't know, Rach," Chandler admitted. "It just slipped out of my mouth. I mean… I always say to Monica I love her as a friend. But it felt different this time."

"But do you?" Rachel asked, her eyes fixing on Chandler's. "Do you love her as more than a friend?"

"Do I love her? I don't know, Rach," He answered honestly. "I spent all morning thinking about it. I had never thought about things that way. I'm not sure I can call it love, but I'm certain I have stronger feelings for her. Gosh, why does it have to be so complicated?"

Rachel now had a big smile plastered on her face.

"I don't think it's complicated. And I think you know it too. You're just too afraid to admit it to yourself. I'll ask you a question, and I need you to answer me honestly."

Chandler nodded.

"Do you see Monica as more than a friend?"

There was no point in denying it anymore. Rachel was right. Deep down, he knew it was true.

"Yes. I do. I want to be with Monica," Chandler finally admitted out loud. It felt like a weight had been lifted from his chest.

Rachel's smile widened even more.

"You guys would make such a cute couple. You have to tell her, Chandler."

Chandler frowned at her. "Why would I do that? To ruin what's remaining of our friendship? I'd rather keep this a secret forever and have Monica as a friend if she ever forgives me."

"She will. Think of how such a cute family you three would be. You, Monica, and your kid…"

"I don't know, Rachel. She seemed scared to hear it this morning. What would happen if I told her I have feelings for her, and she doesn't feel the same? This morning, she asked me to leave. What if she asks me to leave forever? I could never do that."

A hand smacked his head.

"Chandler, stop being so dense. Monica is mad at you because she felt betrayed by the person she cares most about in the entire world. The last person she expected to hurt her. Monica knew that her baby was yours from the beginning and still chose to have it and immediately loved him. She chose you to be the father of her kid. How could you even remotely think she doesn't feel the same way?"

"You think…" Chandler started to ask, hoping to fill his entire body.

"Now that I know it's you, I have no doubts, Chandler," Rachel answered his unsaid question, grabbing his hand in a friendly gesture. "Now, go and end this suffering for both of you," She added, tilting her head and gazing toward the door that separated him from the possible love of his life.

He didn't need any further encouragement.