Sorry about the delayed update. This week was chaotic and I didn't have time to post sooner. Even after this chapter, there's still a lot to happen, so don't give up now on this story!
Chandler's heart broke at the sight that presented him as soon as he entered the apartment across the hall. Standing by the window, Monica stood with her arms crossed, melancholically staring at the street below. Chandler took a deep breath before announcing his presence.
"Hey," He started, causing Monica to turn to him with a sorrowful expression.
"What do you want?" Monica asked, her voice raspid and cold.
She was still mad at him, as Chandler had predicted. But he took another deep breath and continued:
"I want to talk about what happened today. We had a rough morning, and I can't let it linger like this. Can we talk?" He asked in a calm and soft tone.
"We already went over this. I don't have anything more to say to you," Monica spoke slowly, although with a hit of anger.
"I meant what I said this morning," Chandler proceeded, determined to say everything he'd come to the apartment to say. "I meant it every word I said. I love you, and I would never hurt you."
Right at that second, Monica's expression subtly changed. And, for a second, Chandler let himself believe that something similar as hope crossed her face.
"Fine, talk," Monica caved.
So, Chandler stepped closer to Monica, still not close enough to touch her, and with his hands inside his pockets, he nervously tried to come up with the right words.
"I messed up. I shouldn't have said what I said yesterday. I'm so sorry, Monica. And if I need to, I will repeat it until you realize how serious I am about it. I care so much about you. And I hate to see you upset, knowing I'm the reason for you to be like that."
Monica looked at him, her expression softening, only if just a bit.
"By what you said, it didn't seem like you care that much. It didn't seem like a way of showing you care," Monica finally spoke, the hurt clearly visible in every word she said.
"I know. And I'm sorry, but it was a lot for me to process. And since this morning, I've been struggling with processing other things. One thing, more specifically, that I only a few minutes ago realized so clearly. Something that I want you to know," Chandler spoke firmly, daring to look Monica in the eyes.
She looked at him, and their gazes locked on each other's. The atmosphere in the room changed as if a magic spell was pulling them to each other. Monica must have sensed something was about to change because her blue eyes shone with expectation like the waves in a tormented ocean. Then, she took a step forward, getting closer to him. A lot closer than they'd been in the past 24 hours.
"And what is that thing?" She asked so softly that Chandler wouldn't have heard it if they weren't so close.
Chandler gulped, suddenly anxious, as a wave of awareness ran through his body. Everything was about to change.
"I like you, Monica. And not the way I've been liking you for the past years. I realized that I have new, stronger feelings for you. I know that I shouldn't, but I can't control them, and it's confusing the crap out of me. And considering everything that's going on, this may be too much, but I need you to know this. Even if you don't feel the same way," He finally confessed, feeling like a weight had been lifted off his chest.
Monica's eyes shone brighter, this time not with sorrow but with happiness, and she took one final step, wrapping her arms around Chandler's torso.
"You like me?" Monica asked, surprised. All of her anger towards him was now completely dissipated.
"Yeah, I do," Chandler answered, removing a strand of black hair from her face so that he could look into her eyes as deeply as he wished.
Leaning into his touch, Monica let out a small laugh, a mixture of relief and something Chandler couldn't decipher.
"You're not mad at me?" Chandler asked, hoping their quarrel had come to an end. At least, it seemed like it.
Monica grabbed his hand in hers and locked eyes with Chandler again.
"I was but… I have been developing feelings that I shouldn't for you, too," Monica admitted in a shy voice as if she was afraid Chandler's words had been purely her imagination.
Chandler's eyes widened in disbelief. He had this tiny hope that what Rachel had said was true. But hearing it felt different.
"You… also like me?" He asked, as surprised as Monica when he'd confessed his feelings for her.
"Of course I do, you idiot! Why do you think I was so mad at you after yesterday? I've been dreaming of being with you for so long and was afraid I'd lost you even before I got to tell you that," Monica replied, her voice starting to tremble by the end of the sentence.
"I'm so sorry, Mon. I really am," Chandler said one more time. And this time, Monica finally seemed to accept his apology because right then, she tightened her embrace and started to cry, her face buried into his shirt.
"Oh god, Chandler. I'm so afraid of everything that's happening. And I was terrified I would have to do this without you," She sobbed, holding onto Chandler as if she never wanted to be anywhere else.
Chandler caressed Monica's hair, calming her down until he could only hear muffled sobs.
"You don't have to be scared anymore. I promised you this morning I wouldn't go anywhere. And I intend on keeping that promise," Chandler declared, hoping Monica would believe he meant it.
Monica finally lifted her face, letting her red, bloodshot eyes meet Chandler's again.
"I'm sorry for not listening to you this morning. I don't want us to be like this," Monica declared between short sobs.
"Me neither. Let's not waste any more time being mad at each other, okay?" Chandler said softly, feeling his head already leaning towards Monica.
"I don't want to be mad at you," Monica repeated before closing the gap between them, letting their lips touch, not for the first time, but for the first time that it held a deeper meaning.
They were so engrossed in the moment that they didn't notice the sound of the apartment's door opening.
"Aww, you guys!" Rachel cooed from near the kitchen island.
They immediately broke apart, a slight blush painting both their faces. Rachel looked apologetically at Chandler.
"Sorry. I thought the conversation would go faster. I wanted to give you two some privacy, but I couldn't stay in your apartment alone forever…" She tried to excuse herself.
Awkwardness spread through Chandler's body. Since he'd left the apartment a few moments before, he hadn't had time to process that Rachel would know how his conversation with Monica would go. The situation was, by itself, already strange, but being caught was more embarrassing.
"C'mon. Stop being embarrassed by it. You two need to get used to having an audience. It's not like this was the only time this will ever happen," Rachel declared, still grinning at the new couple.
Only then did Chandler notice Monica's inquisitive look on him.
"I…"He tried to explain. But he didn't have a chance.
"I know everything, Mon," Rachel interrupted. "And if it wasn't for me, you two would be playing this "I love you - I hate you" game of yours for god knows how long."
"You know, everything?" Monica asked, trying to see if Rachel knew the biggest secret of it all.
"Everything." Rachel declared, showing no doubts that she indeed knew everything. "I'm so happy for you guys!" She squealed, coming toward Chandler and Monica and wrapping them in a tight hug.
"How do you…" Monica started, then turned to Chandler, who felt like a laser beam was being pointed at him.
"I didn't mean to tell her, I swear. But I let some stuff slip, and she figured the rest out for herself," Chandler tried again to defend himself, pointing at Rachel.
"Can't help he cracks easily under pressure," their friend stated. Then, she turned around and went to her room.
"I'm going to give you two love birds a few more moments of privacy. Don't worry about being interrupted anymore," Rachel winked, closing the bedroom door behind her.
Chandler was left alone with Monica again, only this time, he felt more awkward than he had a few minutes before. Now that the romantic mood of the confessions was broken, it was time for a serious conversation.
"So…," He started, unsure of what to say. He wanted to be sure that everything that happened just moments before had meant something for their relationship.
So…," He tried again, "I like you, and you like me. What does it mean?" He asked, taking Monica's hand in his again.
"That we like each other?" Monica responded with a small laugh, clearly feeling as awkward as Chandler.
"You know what I meant."
"I know. And what do you want us liking each other to mean?"
"I want us," Chandler said, placing his hands on Monica's stomach, "to be a family." He declared with the assurance and the feeling he'd lacked the previous night.
Monica smiled brightly at him. A smile wider than Chandler ever remembered seeing.
"I can't imagine it to be any other way."
They wrapped their arms around each other, acknowledging that everything had changed. And one thing was for sure: they were going to be alright.