Chapter 28: Blinded

Jasmine and I got into the habit of meeting in the gardens late at night towards the end of my workday. The princess was intent on trying to figure out who I was. She asked me a lot about my family and my history. Some stuff, I couldn't answer like my birthplace or the names of my family members, but I made up for it by telling stories about my past and things I hadn't thought of in ages. It was like our whole dynamic changed. Suddenly she was the listener and I was the one talking.

Not that she was a silent listener. It was an effort to get through a story without her interrupting with yet another question. And sometimes, she would be inspired and overtake the conversation with a story of her own. I didn't mind. Most of these stories were new. I realized I hadn't known much about her early childhood. Jasmine rarely talked about her mother who was apparently very involved in the young princess's upbringing. I loved learning more about Jasmine and I loved how excited she was to learn about me.

I probably could have kept talking to her like this for months, but after a week, Jasmine said, "Seriously Ren, what would it take to get you to come out from behind this tree."

"Princess…" This wasn't the first time she hinted that she wanted us to move and hint was a generous description.

"Jasmine," she corrected.

"Jasmine," I said. "It's not possible."

"It's totally possible," she argued. "I get that you don't want me to see you, but…don't you want to sit down? The fountain is right there and there's the bench on your side as well."

"If you prefer to sit, you are welcome to, princess."

"Oh, hush you. You're getting that courtly tone in your voice."

"I am not," I protested. "I was just trying to be polite."

"Exactly," she said.

We were silent as I glared at her through the leaves.

"Well," she said after a moment, "even if you have no ideas, I do. I could cover my eyes with a piece of cloth. What do you think?"

I considered it. "I don't know…"

"Come on, Ren. Let's try it," she said eagerly. I could imagine her eyes sparkling with excitement.

I couldn't say no.

The next night, Princess Jasmine was sitting on the edge of the peacock fountain wearing a blindfold.

I approached the fountain slowly.

Jasmine's head moved when she heard me coming. "Ren? Is that you?"

"It's me," I said. I sat down a respectable distance away.

After a moment, she said, "See. This is much better."

"Don't be surprised if I suddenly disappear," I said eyeing the blindfold skeptically. The blue piece of fabric was hardly comforting.

"I'll be good," she promised.

I huffed.

That was even less of a comfort. Since we started meeting at night, she had already tried to catch a glimpse of me once. I had transformed into a tiger and she found a disoriented Rajah sitting in my place. I had hoped that she would put the pieces together and realize what had happened but of course, I should have known it would not be that easy. It never was. Jasmine had only looked confused. Since then she'd been "good", but I wasn't holding my breath.

Jasmine turned to face me. My heart stopped for a moment. This was the first time that I'd seen her clearly and up close in years. The last time had been when she was nearly 11.

The princess was no longer 11. I finally understood what every man in the palace already knew. Even blindfolded, I could tell that the princess was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. Somehow my human eyes saw things, I hadn't noticed as a tiger, like the way her hair shined in the moonlight or the fullness of her lips. I sat there stunned.

"Ren?" she asked reaching out. "Are you there?"

My hand shot out to grab hers before it smacked me in the face. "I'm here," I said.

I meant to pull away, but the princess squeezed my hand.

"So, you are real," she said.

"Of course, I'm real," I said.

Jasmine shook her head. "That's a relief. There was always a slight possibility I was crazy and talking to myself. Of course, I might still be crazy, but at least I'm not worried about it anymore."

"You're not crazy," I said firmly. The idea of me being a figment of her imagination was beyond unsettling.

"You'd say that whether I was crazy or not," Jasmine mused.

Why did she have to say that? Why did it have to make sense? I held her hand firmly and said, "Feel that. I am real, so no more talk of you being crazy."

"How can I argue with that," she said playfully.

I was going to press my case for her sanity further, but her smile distracted me. Her lips were so full and such a lovely shade of red? Brown? I wasn't sure in this lighting.

"You have young hands," she said interrupting my thoughts.

I blinked. "I am young," I replied, confused. Even now the princess sometimes said the strangest things.

"I thought you sounded young, but I wasn't sure if you actually were," she admitted.

And I wasn't sure what to say to that, so we just sat there as the fountain water splashed behind us. We were still holding hands. I knew I should let go. Holding onto her hand was foolish, even if it was warm and fit nicely into my own. It wasn't right for me to do this. I really should let go.

The princess tilted her face towards the sky and said, "You know, this fountain is one of my favorite places in the whole palace. It sounds beautiful. I never noticed that before."

"The benefits of a blindfold, I suppose," I said wryly.

"That's not the only one," she said

Yes. Definitely not the only one.

"I finally got you to sit down with me," she said.

Right. That. Yes. That was the benefit and nothing else. The hand holding was not relevant in the least.

"Even if it took forever to convince you," she said dramatically.

I smiled. "Don't be ridiculous. It's only been a week."

"Which means I had to ask you like seven times," she said in the same theatrical tone.

"Four times, math genius," I corrected her. A few nights this week, I had reluctantly decided I could not afford a break and spent the whole night in the study. The government didn't fix itself after all.

"That rounds up in base 7." Jasmine argued, "And regardless, the exact number is insignificant. What matters is that I had to ask you more than once. It's rare that I have to repeat a request. I'm not used to working so hard outside of politics. Most people just do what I say."

"Well, you are the princess," I reminded her.

She sobered. "Yeah," she said, "for all the good that does me."

"It does Agrabah plenty of good," I pointed out.

Jasmine smirked. "You know, Ren. Right now, I don't want to talk about the good of Agrabah."

"Right," I said, feeling dumb. Of course, that wasn't what she meant.

Jasmine leaned toward me. She was too close. My heart hammered in my chest as she said, "Although, there is something I do want to talk about. Ren, I really need to thank you for being honest with me."

"There's no need," I said. My voice was tight. "You've thanked me for my help many times."

"No, I'm not talking about that. I was talking about Prince Ali."

Oh.

"I'm so glad you spoke up."

"It was nothing," I croaked. I should tell her that she was too close. I could barely think.

"No, it was very important. You see everyone liked Prince Ali and even if they didn't, most people were too anxious to see me married to care about whether he was a good person. Except for Rajah," she added. "But Rajah never likes my suitors. I just wanted so badly for Ali to be different. Almost every suitor I meet is a complete disaster and the only two men I was betrothed to have both disappeared. Sometimes I feel cursed and I don't know what to do about it."

"Princess…" I knew exactly how she felt.

She shook her head. "But that's not the point. What I am trying to say is that I am glad that you warned me about Prince Ali. I was so deep into wanting him to be the one that I really needed solid evidence to convince me that something was wrong. If you hadn't provided it, I would have gone through with the engagement. I would have been married to the prince before I discovered his true character."

That's when it hit me. "But you are still engaged to him. The court thinks you're getting married." I finally did the right thing and pulled my hand away.

Jasmine didn't seem to notice the difference. She turned away to face the fountain and said, "With Ali being gone for so long, I'm not sure it matters. After a few months, Father declared Prince Dhiren dead, though they never found his body. The same thing will probably happen now with Prince Ali. I hope he is alive and safe somewhere, but he certainly hasn't bothered to prove it." Her voice was bitter. "He could be anywhere right now. He could be dying in the desert winter or relaxing in the tropics, but either way, I bet he hasn't spared a thought about how much his leaving would affect things. He just decided Agrabah was not fun anymore and left without even saying goodbye. He-"

Jasmine stopped talking and jammed a fist into her mouth.

I leaned forward, concerned, and then I saw that she was crying. I did not know what to say. My first instinct was to embrace her, but of course, I couldn't do that.

Jasmine continued before I could figure out what to do. "I'm sorry. We're supposed to be talking about you, but instead, here I am crying about Prince Ali," she said, brushing her tears away.

"It's alright," I said. I decided to take one of her hands again. It wasn't enough. She looked desperately in need of a hug.

"No, it isn't," she said. "None of this is alright. I can't keep pretending it is. Every day Rajah looks at me waiting for me to tell Father to cancel the engagement, but I can't. I can't, not without seeing him again. As if seeing him again would change anything. I don't know why I am being so foolish."

"You're not foolish," I argued. "You're worried about Prince Ali because you're a good and kind person, even if he's not. And that's nothing to be ashamed of."

If anything, Ali should be ashamed. I sincerely hoped he was actually doing something and not just avoiding Agrabah as a ploy to make Jasmine worry. If he was...

Jasmine sniffled and wiped at her tears some more. She looked just as miserable and humiliated as before and her tears hadn't stopped.

I had more important things to contemplate than Prince Ali right now. I tried again. "It's been weeks, Jasmine. You're allowed to be upset, especially considering the fact that you two were so close."

"Close?" she said and it came out like a sob. "That's one word for it. Ren, you're too nice."

Gods, had I made it worse? And how was saying close too nice? Did I even want to know?

"Have I insulted you again?" A ghost of a smile graced Jasmine's lips before it faded away and she said, "I'm sorry, Ren."

I squeezed her hand tight and I was going to deny her claim, but then in a stroke of genius or possibly idiocy, I realized the opportunity in front of me. Jasmine was crying and I wasn't getting anywhere with trying to comfort her with words. I couldn't hold her but, there was another option, a risky option. Durga protect me. I decided to try and lighten the mood.

I sniffed and then I responded in the stuffiest voice I could manage, "Yes! Indeed so. My sensibilities are quite offended, princess."

Jasmine faced me again, still sniffling. I knew she was wondering if I had lost my mind. Perhaps I had but I thought I saw her mouth quirk into the beginnings of a smile.

I pressed on. "To think of the tomfoolery Agrabah's fair princess has been getting into. Galivanting about the city. Fraternizing with all sorts at ungodly hours of the night and all with a man no less." I sniffed to great effect.

Jasmine's free hand covered her mouth and hopefully a smile.

I kept going. She hadn't told me to stop. "It boggles the mind that a lady, no, a princess no less, would dream of actually having fun. The mere thought of such harlequinades is enough to give me palpitations."

I thought I heard a suppressed giggle.

I swayed back and though I knew she could not see it, I pressed a hand to my chest and reached out with the other hand in mock distress. "Someone, fetch my fainting couch. I can no longer bear to be lucid in such a heteroclite world." I whimpered theatrically.

The princess was laughing unimpeded now.

It had worked. Thank the gods.

"Ren!" she breathed between her fits of laughter. "What was that? You're so ridiculous." She gave me a playful shove.

I was already leaning back and I wasn't expecting the sudden push. I lost my balance. With a cry and a splash, I fell into the fountain.

Jasmine got up. "Ren? Are you okay?"

Before I could tell her not to, the princess whipped off her blindfold and found me staring back at her.

Jasmine looked this way and that. "Rajah? Have you seen Ren?"

I shook my head. I hadn't technically seen myself recently.

She kept looking around. I got myself out of the fountain, went a distance away, and then shook out my fur.

I hated cold water.

"He's gone," Jasmine whispered.

I looked up at her.

She sat down at the edge of the fountain. I had worked so hard to make her laugh and now she looked miserable again.

I went to her, but I hesitated. I was still damp.

Jasmine had no such hesitation. She petted my wet fur gently as she stared out at the gardens.

"He disappeared. Just like that," she told me. "I don't know what to make of it. I'm not insane, am I? Oh Rajah," Jasmine said, her voice heavy with emotion, "what have I gotten myself into now?"

I watched the princess but I didn't say anything. I couldn't after all. I was just a tiger.

A/N: Pray, I entreat thee. Show favor upon this humble artist. Your sweet words are all I require to sustain my trembling heart.