When the heated discussion was over, Aang got up and quickly ran off with the excuse of searching the forest for something edible. Sokka spared the firebender one more look before going back to fishing. He hadn't had any luck with that since they landed, and he was still craving meat.
Katara started to prepare a late lunch out of dried fruits and rice mixed in a pot that she'd hung over the fire, leaving Zuko to himself. He stayed by the fire, trying to meditate to keep himself busy, but soon he found it difficult to focus with all kinds of thoughts running through his mind. He tried to recall Uncle's words about concentrating on his inner fire, but it only made him think about Iroh even more.
"If he was here, he would probably have a proverb for this, like 'You always have to look for the bright side' or something. I wonder what he will think of me when he finds out what I did. He's probably going to despise me as well. I really hope he won't have any trouble because of me."
Seeing that meditation wasn't really a good option for now, the firebender opened his eyes and looked at the fire burning in front of him. The flames reminded him of what he had done earlier when he woke up.
"What did I actually do back then...? I remember feeling that coldness and being too weak to warm myself up with firebending... Was it possible I had absorbed the fire? I guess I was desperate back then, because I wouldn't even consider trying something like this otherwise... But on the other hand, it does make sense - if we can use our energy to produce fire, then maybe we can also absorb the fire in some way to regain our strength? Maybe I could get some of my strength back that way."
Trying to recall the feeling, the prince closed his eyes and focused on the flames again trying to reach them with his inner flame. It was much harder to do on purpose this time, earlier it was instinctively. He tried to do it for several minutes, but he was getting impatient. The constant burning from the wound on his chest wasn't making it any easier.
"Come on! I already did it once! Alright, calm down... I have time. I've got nothing else to do anyway so I WILL get it right"
He bit the inside of his cheek and took a few deep breaths. He straightened himself and focused on the flame again. It took some time, but eventually, he felt the connection, just as he usually did with the candle flames during meditation. The flame began to move gently, rising slightly along with his breath. However, it still wasn't right! He frowned slightly. "What am I doing wrong...? Is it not about controlling the fire...?"
He loosened the bond slightly and just observed the flame for a while. It was burning steadily, slowly consuming the wood, giving off the light and the heat.
"Is it perhaps... The fire doesn't even exist on its own, it's a process. We can see it burn, feel the heat, but it can go out in seconds when the source is cut off... So, when we create it, then it's our own chi that is being burnt. It's not like it should be flammable, so we just turn it into a fire ourselves. Could that be reversed...? Can I reverse the burning itself?"
He grasped the fire with his inner flame once more, but instead of focusing on the actual flames, he focused on the energy they carried, trying to force them back into their harmless form of chi under his control. At first, nothing seemed to happen, but then it gradually yielded. He carefully began pulling the fire's energy toward him, and he felt immediately how it added to his own, fueling his inner flame.
Katara was just checking on rice in the pot from the opposite side of the campfire when she noticed the flames faltering, getting weaker somehow. She quickly connected the fact with the firebender sitting next to the bonfire, and she moved closer to him, reaching for her waterskin in case he was going to attack her with the flames. "Hey! What are you doing?"
The question distracted Zuko enough to lose his connection with the fire, which now continued to burn normally. He sighed in annoyance, but he didn't want to raise any suspicion.
"Nothing" he stated simply, not bothering to look at her. It only served to raise her suspicion, so he decided to elaborate.
"I was checking if I could absorb the energy of fire." He paused for a moment before continuing. "I think I've already done it earlier when I was unconscious to regain some strength, and it seems I was right."
The Water Tribe girl looked at him confusedly and lowered her hands. "How is that even possible?"
"I think that's because we use our chi to produce a flame. It's possible we can also do the reverse."
He didn't know why he was even explaining this to her, but he decided it wasn't anything she couldn't know. The neutral conversation didn't seem so bad either.
"I was kind of wondering how it's even possible for firebenders to produce their own fire" she thought out loud as she went back to stirring the dish in the pot using waterbending.
"Well, fire isn't something material, so it doesn't just exist in the world without having something to fuel it."
"But still, you can control the 'natural' fire when it exists next to you, can't you? Like the one burning here." Katara said sarcastically "So you do have an unfair advantage."
"That's one of the reasons why we're taught that the Fire is superior element" he admitted "It's-"
"Fire is WHAT!? In your dreams!" she huffed angrily.
The firebender looked at her with curiosity. He hadn't really thought about it, just accepted it as a fact when the tutors had told him so. It seemed obvious, so he wondered why she didn't want to admit it.
"But, you just said yourself that-"
"I said you had an unfair advantage, not that your bending is superior! I would never exchange my waterbending for this... this... All you do with it is spread destruction across the world!" The waterbender was now really angry.
Zuko wanted to retort to that, but he bit his tongue. Truth be told, they probably didn't know how the firebenders used their fire for things like glass-making, cooking, or warming up muscles after a tough day. When the army was approaching, they actually used it to fight and burn, so she was kind of right.
Her shouts brought Sokka's attention to them, and he finally gave up on his fruitless fishing attempts, coming closer to the camp.
"What's going on? Did he do anything?"
"Oh, not at all! He was just explaining to me how the fire is superior element" his sister huffed in response, turning back to the pot with rice.
"It's what? Of course it's not!" agreed Sokka turning to the firebender
"Then which element is superior in your opinion?" Zuko asked folding his arms.
"None of them is" Aang said, startling everyone with his usual unnaturally quiet arrival "All elements are equal."
"What? Are you really putting that... art of destruction on a pair with other bending types?" asked Katara with disbelief.
"That's what the monks had taught us back at the temple." he answered, shrugging. "All elements are equal and together they create a balance."
"Umm, yeah, whatever...," Sokka noticed that the conversation was heading in the wrong direction and decided to change the topic. "So, what's for lunch?"
Katara didn't seem happy with the new course of discussion, but she decided to dismiss it for now. She moved to get the bowls "Rice with fruits. Mostly peachberries"
Sokka moaned disappointed "No meat again...?"
"Well, have you caught any meat?" she retorted angrily as she passed him his bowl.
He accepted it without saying a word.
"But you don't really need meat in the meal, Sokka!" Aang said cheerfully "And I bet it's delicious as always!"
Katara blushed slightly, forgetting momentarily that she was mad at him. She passed the bowl to the kid, and then held a spare bowl in the firebender's direction, without looking at him. Somewhat surprised, he took it and soon they were all eating by the fire in silence.
"So, I was thinking, maybe we should go to that village and see what the fortune-teller will tell us? It could-" started Aang, but was quickly interrupted by Sokka.
"Not that again! It's all just guesswork and wishful thinking; there's no real way to predict the future."
"Come on, Sokka," said Katara, smiling lightly. "It won't hurt to try anyway."
"Uhh, fine..." he seemed to concede, realizing that he could appease his sister with this compromise. "But maybe tomorrow? It seems pretty late, and I'm not sure she would take you in by the time we reach the village."
"You still have about three hours until sunset," Zuko stated without raising his eyes from his bowl. They had kind of forgotten about him during their conversation, so they looked at him in surprise.
"How do you know?" Sokka asked sceptically "It's pretty cloudy"
Zuko shrugged in response "It doesn't matter. Firebenders can usually tell the position of the sun most of the time."
"Huh... Okay, but we didn't see the village when we were landing so getting there is probably going to take a while anyway. I still think it'd be better to go tomorrow morning"
"Fine by me! I'm wondering what she will predict in my future" Aang pondered with a big grin.
"Me too" Katara agreed excitedly "Maybe she will see what my future husband is going to be like?"
Aang blushed slightly at these words, but nobody seemed to notice it. He spent a rest of the day practicing waterbending with Katara, and Sokka decided to go hunting in the forest.
Left alone again, Zuko decided it would be a good idea to wash himself, since he still wore the same bloodied clothes from his Blue Spirit outfit. He slowly stood up, and walked far enough away from where Aang was practicing with Katara, so they wouldn't see him. Fortunately, they didn't seem to pay much attention to him anymore.
He found a good spot by the water and knelt down to wash his face first. He hesitated when he touched his hair, tied into a messy phoenix ponytail.
"I don't deserve even that anymore. I'm not worthy of the Fire Nation Prince title, and my father will disown me anyway when he learns that I am a traitor."
He reached into his boot for his dagger. He was relieved that they hadn't taken it away from him, though this time its sight brought him little comfort. Without looking at the blade, to avoid seeing the inscription on it, he raised it above his head. Then, with one swift motion, he cut his hair off, and tossed it into the river. He spared it one more look before taking a deep breath. Then he shaved the remaining hair to even it out. There was no more point in pondering, so he focused on what he was doing at the moment.
He took his shirt off, and realized that washing your clothes while washing yourself made sense, especially that it was the only one set of clothes he had. He had a good habit of checking his pockets, ever since his notes were ruined in a laundry accident a few years ago aboard his ship. So, he proceeded to do it now.
Unexpectedly, he found a blue necklace that he had been holding onto for a while, hoping he could find some way to use it against the Avatar. Now, however, it was no longer useful to him, so he decided he could return it to its owner as well. Placing it next to his knife, he continued to undress, as well as unwrap the bandage around his chest. He was relieved to see that the wound wasn't infected and that it even appeared to be starting to heal, although he knew it would probably leave a nasty scar.
"Just another one to collection"
After washing himself and his clothes, as well as bandages, he tried to dry them by passing warmth through his hands, but it turned out he was to weak to do it. He cursed under his breath again - he would have to put them by the fire to dry.
As he went back, the firebender wondered how much strength he could actually regain from the fire. He hadn't managed to gain much before he was interrupted, and walking still made him lightheaded, so he decided to continue his earlier experiments. He needed to get better as soon as possible.
"Still nothing?"
The arriving group only looked away in answer. Not that the old general didn't expect that, but still... there had to be a sign, any sign of his nephew.
"Alright, you may continue your search in the northwestern direction. Head towards the river and proceed-"
"GENERAL IROH!"
A sudden shout caught everyone's attention. All eyes fell on a soldier who came into view, frantically waving his arms.
"We found something!"
Iroh didn't even know when his legs carried him to the messenger. "Lead the way!"
They were not far from the said place, and soon the grim scene came into their view. Burned grass and a few half-burned trees indicated that a firebending fight had taken place there recently.
"General Iroh." one of the search party members present bowed with respect "We think it might have been-"
"Obviously a fight, and judging by the size of the destruction, a powerful bender was involved. Which means Zuko or the Avatar... maybe both" Iroh said as he began analyzing the situation. There was no time to lose.
"Were you able to figure out the outcome of this fight?" he asked the men who had found it.
"We, um, well..." the man scratched his head and turned back to the scene. "There are signs of burning everywhere."
"But those trees are burnt in a row! Perhaps a strong straight blow to cover an escape?" one of the crew offered eagerly, motioning a line from the trees to the forest.
Iroh looked at the burnt trees in thought and slowly shook his head.
"No. It was a single blow indeed, but not a straight one. More like a wide arching blow. Check the other side of the trees; it's not burned, is it?"
Although the question was rhetorical to him, a few men rushed to see it and soon gave out surprised shouts of confirmation. He paid them only half-mind, trying to estimate the distance it had been thrown from. The blow hit the trees about a head level, so it came out from a low position, a round kick... He'd been training his nephew for three years, he could almost imagine him doing it here. It would have come from... here!
Iroh backed up to the single tree, and he noticed it was slightly singed on one side as well. But when he checked around it, he noticed an even more alarming sight- there were signs of blood on the bark and the grass next to it. Iroh's men had already joined him, seeing that he was onto something, and one of them pointed at something in the grass. "Look! Is that...?"
And true enough, there was a bloodied arrow, broken. Iroh felt something cold grip his heart. He took the arrow in his hand in thought.
"So Zhao didn't lie about that. But if Zuko was able to get the arrow out and continue to fight well enough to escape, then maybe the wound wasn't that dangerous. Still, we need to find him. Gather everyone; we'll continue our search in this direction."
While the men quickly scattered around the area, Iroh took one more look at the ground by the tree. His poor boy was somewhere out there, chased and wounded. What if he was wrong, and the wound was a dangerous one? What if his nephew had pushed himself further than he should have? Just like he always did.
"There is no time to loose! Give me the map! What's in this direction?"
Navigator rushed to him immediately, handing him the paper.
"According to our information there used to be an old Earth Kingdom monastery but it's just ruins now. Do you think he went up this mountain, sir?"
Iroh looked at the map in thought.
"It would be strenuous, but it seems to be the direction he was heading from the fortress. We'll check this, and if there's no sign of him, we'll head back and continue west towards the river."
Zuko stayed by the fire for the rest of the afternoon, and his experiments with the fire became increasingly fruitful. Connecting with the flame was a little easier this time, now that he already knew the feeling. He noticed how the flame weakened when he drew it too quickly, and after making some minor adjustments, he found that drawing the energy at a slower pace resulted in a steady, sustainable flow. Occasionally, he had to pause to add more wood to the fire, as it tended to burn faster.
Meanwhile, Sokka returned from his hunt, carrying a small owlhog slung over his shoulder. He examined the firebender, but it seemed he wasn't doing anything. Knowing Aang, walking farther away from the fire to prepare the owlhog for cooking was a good idea. He continued working, occasionally casting glances at Zuko, until he could no longer stand it.
"How can you just sit there for hours without moving? You haven't budged from this spot since I left."
A sudden question brought Zuko back from his focus. He opened his eyes to look at the Water Tribe warrior in surprise.
What else can I do? Is there any specific thing that you would like for me to handle?
"Well... no, but I mean..." Sokka scratched his head in confusion before adding quietly "It just looks boring."
Zuko sighed and turned back to the fire, preparing mentally to continue his previous activity, but as soon as he closed his eyes he heard:
"What are you doing anyway? Don't tell me you're sleeping in a sitting position."
Sokka said it casually, still occupied with his task, but he was getting suspicious of the firebender. No one could just sit still for hours without plotting something!
"I wasn't sleeping." Zuko said curtly. "I already told your sister, I was just trying to absorb the fire." The other guy was starting to get on his nerves.
"Wait, you're trying to do what?"
"Absorb the fire. You know firebenders create their own fire, and apparently it's possible to absorb it back."
He didn't notice how his answer only served to alarm the other teen even more. Slowly standing up, Sokka turned towards him, still holding onto the knife he had been using on the owlhog. "So what you're saying is that you've been sitting there, gathering fuel to firebend?"
These words actually made Zuko realize how it sounded. He stood up as well and held his hands up in a conciliatory gesture.
"I... Hold on. Yes, it's true, but I'm just trying to gain my strength back so I can get out of here. I'm not a threat to you."
When Sokka didn't answer, he added "Don't you want me to leave as soon as possible?"
They held each other's gaze for a while, but their attention was suddenly drawn to Aang and Katara, who were just coming back from their waterbending training.
"I'm watching you." Sokka said quietly enough for the firebender to hear, and turned back to finish preparing the meat.
Aang walked closer to them in his usual cheerful mood. "What are you doing? Eeew! Did you hunt down another poor animal again?"
Katara noticed her brother was in a bad mood and smiled at him apologetically. "Don't mind him, that's great! We'll have more food. I can cook dinner with it."
She turned her attention to the bonfire and her good mood quickly faltered as the sight of their new companion reminded her of their new reality, which she had managed not to think about for the past few hours. She sighed and came closer to check if they had everything they needed, and she noticed there wasn't enough firewood. She sighed again, exasperated "We need more firewood."
All three boys looked at her, and Zuko quickly recalled how he had been using it earlier. He quickly offered "I'll go get more wood."
"No, stay here, you should be resting" Aang said with a smile. "I will bring it, maybe I'll find some berries or mushrooms on the way."
And so he ran off with his usual haste, leaving the rest of the group in painfully awkward silence. Zuko didn't know if he should offer his help or just sit by the fire like he usually did. The second option sounded far more pleasant, but he remembered the Water Tribe boy's earlier warning and didn't want to give him any more suspicion. Casting a quick glance at his sister, he noticed that she wasn't even doing anything yet, as she still waited for both boys to bring ingredients.
The prince suppressed a sigh and put his hands in his pockets, feeling the necklace that was still there. Now was as good a time as any. He took a step towards the girl, who immediately noticed him.
"I, uh... You remember that necklace? You said it was your mother's... I still had it on me, so, uh... It's yours." He held it, still wrapped up in cloth in front of him awkwardly, and watched as a mix of emotions came over her. Disbelief, anger, relief all at once. She didn't answer however, just reached quickly for it, as if she thought it might disappear in the next second. Upon unwrapping it, the only emotion that remained was relief.
By then, Sokka had already noticed that something was going on, and came closer. However, when he recognized the object Katara held as their mother's necklace, he halted, confused.
"Wait, YOU had it...? How did you get it?"
Zuko turned to him, seeing that he was about to be questioned again.
"I found it on the prison raft after you broke the Earthbenders out. I thought then that it could be useful if it held some value for you." He answered truthfully, and immediately regretted it, seeing the boy's brows begin to furrow in anger. Before he could say anything more, they heard Katara's quiet voice:
"It's the only thing I have left of her..."
Zuko looked at her, shocked, immediately catching the meaning of this.
"Her mother is dead; I have taken the only keepsake she had of her mother."
A massive wave of guilt washed over him. He bowed low before the girl. "Forgive me. If I had known it was a keepsake of your deceased mother, I would have returned it to you immediately. I didn't know; please accept my apologies."
Both siblings looked at him in surprise, as his apology sounded genuine. Sokka couldn't stop himself from making a sarcastic comment, however.
"Yeah, sure you would."
Zuko straightened up, and this time his answer came through clenched teeth "Yes, I would. I know what it's like to lose a mother."
Not wanting to reveal any more emotion than he already had, he walked away from them. He caught himself quickly, remembering that they probably still wanted to keep an eye on him, so he stopped at the riverbank a short distance away.
"I thought I'm already past that! Mother... Of course I'm not the only one, they know this too... I... Ugh, I need to get out of here!"
He stood there, breathing heavily, with his eyes clenched shut. He knew that even with the fire he absorbed, he was still weak. He would probably manage to walk away from them, but after that... Would he be able to find food and shelter, to survive? Probably not. The Avatar insisted on him staying, so they would have to stand each other for a little while longer.
"Agni, have mercy..."
It seemed like a cruel answer, as the sun began to set before his eyes, taking away its strength from him.
"Of course."
"There's nothing here! Shouldn't we go back down and check the river, sir?"
Although it was only a logical thing to ask of his men, something told Iroh he was close. There had to be something. He pointed a little higher up the mountain at the last set of ruined buildings they hadn't checked yet.
"That's the last one. If there's no sign of it, we can head back. It's getting dark; without any light, we won't be able to find anything."
The entire crew kept silent as they walked, exchanging looks with one grim thought. Why would the prince come here? Yet who were they to object when the general spoke?
Iroh was a first see inside a ruin, and to his surprise there was... Nothing! Impossible! There had to be something, it's not possible that he lost his... He must have been here, he just had to...
"Sir!"
The voice snapped him out of his stupor. He turned slowly to see one of their firebenders waving at him, while holding the fire in his hand to provide more light.
"What is it, Noren?" he asked as he came over to the man numbly.
He crouched lower and picked something from the floor. "Take a look at this, sir. Doesn't it resemble something?"
Iroh leaned over to get a better look and recognized it instantly. "The flying bison's fur! So the Avatar was here!"
The rest of the crew gathered there quickly to take a look as well.
"So... The prince came here with the Avatar...?"
"Or maybe he followed him here after they escaped?"
"But where did they go?"
It was the same thought that was on Iroh's mind right now. Where had they gone? He wanted to know as well, but it seemed that their search had just begun.
"I'm afraid that to get all these answers, we'll have to do just what we've been doing for years. We need to find the Avatar."