A/N: Thanks for the continued support in those reviews, and shout out to Nancy for appreciating the slow burn in this fic :) Now, who's up for a wedding?
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)
Chapter 8
"Okay, now I feel like you're not even listening to me."
Jess looked up from the counter he had been half-heartedly wiping down, to realise that Kirk was staring at him with an even weirder look on his face than usual. He had been listening to him at the start of the conversation, though he forgot why, but Kirk was right, he zoned out a while ago. Not that the fact was so surprising. The guy was not exactly the world's greatest conversationalist.
"You know, I really thought we were fostering a friendship here. Maybe I was wrong."
Rolling his eyes, Jess grabbed the coffee pot and topped up Kirk's drink. "Feel better now?" he asked with a look.
"Actually, yes. Thank you, friend." He grinned, taking a long sip from his cup.
"You're welcome, friend," Jess deadpanned, heading back through the curtain before he could get pulled any further into Kirk's weird world.
He contemplated the stairs but, in the end, decided not to go up. After all, he was supposed to working. Luke had only run out on an errand, he would be back any minute, and it was probably better if he didn't find his nephew slacking off. The last thing Jess wanted to do was piss off the guy that was being so decent about giving him a job and a place to stay, again and after everything.
Of course, there were limits, and Jess really couldn't take much more talk of him and Kirk being friends. Besides, he had another 'friend' on his mind. Pulling out his cell, he checked to see if he had missed a call or text from Rory. There was nothing, which was not all that surprising. She would probably be home any time now, for a weekend with her mom. Not that Jess expected to see her. That was largely his own fault.
Things had been going pretty well up to now, their whole attempt at an actual friendship. Sure, it all got kind of weird the other night over at her dorm, when they had both escaped the party by hiding in Rory's bedroom. Jess had been feeling so many things, having so many thoughts he never would have dared to voice. He knew Rory was having the same problem, at least, he was pretty sure, but rather than making him feel better, if anything, it only made matters worse.
It made more sense for him to leave than hang around making things harder (and man, did he ever wish he had a better phrase for that!) but still, he wondered if he should have kissed her before he left. She might have let him. She looked like she almost wanted him to, but Jess didn't dare risk it. He had screwed up way too many times with Rory before, he was determined to be all kinds of careful this time around.
Of course, in order to do the right thing, you had to know what it was. A couple of days ago, when Rory had called and told him she would be coming home for a visit this weekend, Jess hadn't been sure what the right thing to say really was. He had been largely silent, at least until she had started to sound worried that he wasn't answering anymore.
"Jess? Did I lose you?"
"Still here," he replied, knowing he had no choice. "I was just thinking, about this weekend..."
He didn't know if he should tell her. He told himself she had to already know. Lorelai would have mentioned it, or maybe even Lane. It wasn't down to him to break the news, and it would be completely unnecessary, he was sure, because she just had to know already.
"What? You don't want me to come home?" she asked him, humour in her voice, but just a little worry too, he knew.
Jess hated to think he was scaring her or making her doubt herself or him either. He had to just spit it out, so he did.
"Uh, you do know what's happening here this weekend, right? Specifically Sunday?"
She hadn't known, and when she said as much, Jess knew he had dug himself a real hole. Obviously, her next question was, 'So, what is going on this Sunday?' He had to tell her. He didn't really want to, but he had no choice. Taking a deep breath, he made himself say the words. He even made himself use Lurch's real name, so as not to cause any more damage than was absolutely necessary.
"Dean is marrying Lindsay. That's this Sunday."
The silence on the other end of the line almost killed him, though it couldn't have been more than a few seconds in length.
"Oh," she said eventually. "Well, okay, so... good luck to them, or congratulations to them, or whatever you're supposed to say with these things."
She was surprised, he knew that, to suddenly be hearing about her ex's wedding day, but Jess couldn't be sure what else Rory was feeling. He almost wished he had told her face-to-face, so he could watch her expression, more specifically her eyes. Those baby blues always did give her away. As it was, all he had to go on was her voice over a bad line, with a lot of background noise on both her side and his. It wasn't enough.
"So, are you still coming home?" he had asked her carefully.
"Sure, why not?" she replied, though the call hadn't lasted much longer, after that.
It was the last Jess had heard from her, and now, here they were on Saturday and he wasn't sure if she actually did come home for the weekend or not. He thought about texting to ask, maybe even going over to the Crap Shack later when his shift ended, but Jess wasn't really sure that he should.
Maybe it was better to leave Rory alone, especially if she was crying over her ex. That was not something he wanted to see, not in any way at all, and if that made Jess a crappy friend, well then, he would just have to live with the title.
Shoving his phone back in his pocket, he went back out into the diner proper, glad to see Kirk was long gone. Glancing up at the window, he grimaced on seeing Dean and Lindsay walking by, hand-in-hand and grinning at each other, like something out of an Andy Hardy movie. Thankfully, Jess hadn't seen much of the Boy Wonder up to that point. They passed each other on opposite sides of the street a couple of times since he had been back, but that was all. Forester didn't come into the diner anymore. Jess would like to think he knew better.
Of course, Jess hadn't seen much of Rory either, most notably not today. If she had come visiting this weekend, no doubt she was staying close to home because of the wedding crap. He hated that. He hated that she might still feel anything for the boyfriend that came before him, but he also knew he had no right to feel that way. After all, he was just the next ex in the line now, and that was largely his own fault anyway.
It was late on Sunday when Rory decided to finally get out of the house. She knew it was stupid to hide away for a day-and-a-half of her two-day break from Yale, but honestly, it didn't bother her that much. Hanging out at home with her mom had been every bit as fun as it always was. Besides, she hadn't really been avoiding the wedding set-up and ceremony as such. If anything, she had been trying to keep away from all the people she knew would want to throw very much unneeded and entirely unwanted sympathy her way.
Now the event was over, she felt better about heading out. Besides, she really wanted to go over to the diner to see Jess. It had been so awkward when they last saw each other, ending up alone together in her bedroom and all. She really had been a fool to drag him in there, and on top of that, to bring up the fact both Madeline and Louise were extremely attracted to him. As if they were the only ones!
When he said he should go, Rory hadn't argued with Jess. She would have liked to, in a way, but at the same time, she knew he was right to want to head home. He had never been a party guy, and as much as she appreciated his support as a friend, it was becoming increasingly obvious that maybe they just weren't cut out for that kind of relationship.
It had never worked before. When Rory and Jess got close in the beginning, in spite of the fact she was dating Dean then, it was so horribly obvious that friends was never going to be enough. Not that they had been too successful as a couple when they tried either. In some ways, it worked, but never entirely. They went about it the wrong way, Rory was clear on that now, and surely, the best way to improve a situation was to acknowledge the problems first, then work on them?
Rory had been working hard at Yale, but the truth was, in any spare moment, when she wasn't in class or caught up in assignments, she had been thinking a lot about Jess and their relationship. Rebuilding seemed like such a great idea. They were starting strong this time, with a good foundation, a better understanding of themselves and each other, and knowing where they went wrong last time. Not that she could be one hundred percent sure that Jess even wanted to get back together, but she hoped.
Rory found she was hoping an awful lot, actually. It was part of the reason she wanted to see him today. Not to go blurting out that they should try again, not yet, but almost like a test. To see how she felt when she was around him some more. To see how he reacted to her presence, to her maybe dropping some hints about what their future relationship could be.
As she reached the diner door, she found herself taking a deep breath as she stepped inside. Luke's smile looked a little less than genuine as he glanced up at her, pointing towards the ceiling.
"He's upstairs," he told her, obviously meaning Jess, though Rory hadn't had a chance to say anything yet. "If you wanted to see him..."
"I did, I do," she replied, nodding her head. "Uh, thank you."
It was strange how Luke just assumed she was there for Jess. After all, he knew as well as anybody they were just friends now, definitely not dating. It wasn't like either Jess or Luke was even expecting Rory to drop by - she hadn't called to say so. Still, she supposed it didn't matter. She had wanted to see Jess, preferably alone, and now she was afforded the opportunity.
Ducking behind the curtain and hurrying up the stairs, she paused by the door, thinking better of just barging in. After all, he could be changing clothes or in the shower or something. Rory tried not to react too much to the pictures that danced through her head when she considered those possibilities. For a second or two, she closed her eyes and battled her hormones, then raised her fist and rapped on the door.
She probably should have been relieved when she opened her eyes just as the door swung open to reveal a fully-clothed Jess. What she actually felt was shock, because although he was wearing clothes, he did not look at all how she expected.
"Oh, my God! What happened to you?" she gasped, rushing through the door towards him, her hand hovering precariously close to his cheek, but never quite making contact. "Jess, seriously, who did this to you?"
He heaved a sigh, even as he pulled back away from her, looking just about as awkward as she had ever seen him.
"It doesn't matter," he told her, turning to face the other way.
Rory growled in her throat, stomping around him, making him look at her.
"Jess Mariano, we are not doing this again," she said firmly. "The last time you got a black eye, it was... It was one of the worst nights of my life and I cannot have a repeat of that. So, I'll ask again, as your friend, what happened?"
He stared at her so hard that, even with only one eye that worked well, he seemed to be trying to burn a hole through her very soul. Rory stood her ground, never once in her life having been afraid of him and not feeling the need to start now. He wasn't angry, she knew, just frustrated, maybe embarrassed too. Still, they were going to stand here until he told her the truth this time, nothing else was going to work.
Heaving another sigh, he glanced away again, his eyes going to the floor as he scuffed at the floor with with the toe of his shoe.
"I know you're not exactly going to laugh when I tell you this, but I hope you at least appreciate the irony," he muttered, before finally meeting her gaze again. "This time it really was him. Forester did this," he said, pointing at his eye, the frustration becoming something like real anger as he was forced to admit it.
Rory didn't know what to say. She barely knew what to think. When she had assumed before that Dean and Jess got into a fight that resulted in his last black eye, it had made sense to her that that was how it happened. They had fought over her before, not really physically, but still, it had been a logical explanation then. Now, it made no sense at all.
"But he was marrying Lindsay, and you and I aren't even... I don't understand." She shook her head, feeling completely at a loss.
"Far as I know he did marry Lindsay," Jess confirmed. "But last night, he seemed a little less than convinced that you and I 'aren't even'. Okay, come over here," he said then, taking her by the elbow and leading her to the couch.
He must have noticed before Rory did that she seemed a little wobbly. It was actually a real relief to find herself sitting down, with Jess all of two feet away. Of course, when she looked at him again, particularly at that seriously nasty black eye he was sporting, the faint feeling from before gave way to nausea.
"So, what happened?" she asked, for what felt like the hundredth time in the last five minutes.
Jess hesitated just a second or two before he explained. "He was drunk. Last night, uh, it was the bachelor party, him and a bunch of guys. Kyle was one, but I have no idea about the others and I didn't ask. Anyway, they came staggering in here, making a lot of noise. I went down to see what was going on, since it was after we already closed up. Luke was handling it, and you know how it is with me and Forester, so I just turned around to come right back upstairs... except he spotted me, and things got ugly."
"Oh, God." Rory put her face in her hands, hardly wanting to know what came next, and yet just as sure she had to hear it. "Go on," she urged him.
"It was all stupid stuff. Like I said, he was drunk and rambling. I doubt even he remembers what he was saying..."
"But it was about me," said Rory, a statement, not a question, because seriously, what else could have caused this, really?
"It was," Jess confirmed, nodding his head. "He was telling me how he didn't believe I ever cared about you, not the way he did. That he loved you and that you deserved better. I didn't even try to fight him on any of that. Gotta give the guy his due, he kind of had a point. Anyway, I would've let it go, I honestly would. I was. I turned around again, tried to walk away. He didn't let me. He put his hand on my shoulder, I literally just tried to shrug him off, and the next thing I know..." he trailed off, gesturing to his black eye and saying no more.
Rory swallowed hard. "Oh, Jess, I'm so sorry."
"Hey, come on, this is not your fault," he assured her. "Honestly, if you wanna feel bad for anybody, I'd go with the bride."
The look that went with that sentence made Rory wince even more than the words did. She knew what he meant. Last night, Dean was all out to tell Jess and anyone else who would listen that he still had some pretty strong feelings for Rory. This morning, he married Lindsay, regardless of all that. She probably had no idea her husband was still pining for his ex. Rory felt sick at the very thought.
"Poor Lindsay," she said, shaking her head. "I can't believe that Dean would treat her that way. He was always such a good guy, at least when we were first together. I really thought... I mean, how could he marry her, when his heart is clearly not in it?"
She looked to Jess, hoping for an answer that she knew he couldn't give her. Of all the people to ask about Dean's behaviour, he was absolutely the wrong choice. Not that he even tried to venture a guess on what his old rival was thinking. He probably figured it was safer not to, in the circumstances.
"Honestly? I don't care all that much what's going on with the new Mr and Mrs Forester," he said instead. "He should count himself lucky that he took me by surprise and that Luke stopped me from retaliating the second I recovered. Now, all I'm worried about is you. Are you okay?"
Rory took a moment to consider that, but found her answer came surprisingly easily, in the end.
"I'm... fine," she admitted, even going so far as being able to smile like she meant it, because she really did. "I mean, what Dean feels is... whatever he feels. I'm over it, over him. I have been for a long time. You know that," she said, meeting Jess' gaze, so he would really believe it. "I hope you know that."
He really should, given the fact they had dated for all that time after she and Dean were over, but then, Rory was well aware that Jess often felt he was competing with the shadow of her ex. She hated knowing it was true, but nothing could change the fact now.
"I know that," he told her, nodding his head.
At some point, they seemed to have drifted closer together. Rory couldn't say for sure if it was a conscious thing on Jess' side, but she was completely unaware that she was leaning in at all, until that moment. It was pretty clear that they were both thinking the same thing, how easy it would be to close the gap. It would hardly be the first time they had kissed on this couch. That and a whole lot more besides, actually.
A split second later, the door flew open and there was Luke, looking startled to see the pair of them sat there together. Immediately Rory was on her feet, making excuses to go. She knew it was cowardly and foolish, almost crazy, given the things she had been considering when she first headed for the diner today, but for the moment at least, she just really needed to get out of there.
To Be Continued...