I hope you are all having an amazing day, my fellow undead!

"Mom! I'm fine, I'm okay! You seriously - seriously don't have to worry." I finally snapped, trying my best to keep a smile on my face as she blubbered and freaked out, hugging me, and touching my hair - getting everywhere in my personal space. "The fire didn't touch me at all." I promised for the hundredth time.

"B-But baby… sweetie… that's not right?! I saw it, the whole building just went down. C-charlie said it was…" She cried, barely able to get her words out. I quickly took her hand - mostly to keep her from checking me to see if I was burned anywhere. "W-why are you at the hospital i-if you're ok then?"

I sighed, looking around in the little waiting room, and all the people walking around. Doctors, nurses, and patients getting to where they were going, and my mom and I were completely in the way as we just stood in the hall. I cannot believe Charlie told her I was here… I was really hoping to have this whole conversation at home.

Luckily my appearance was low on her list of worries, because that would've taken way too long to explain.

"I'm with a friend," I tried to explain again, slower this time. "He was in the fire - he's fine, but we're waiting with him till his fiance gets here."

"But… but… I thought you didn't have any…" She asked softly, sniffling as she put her hand on my cheek. "Oh you're so cold." She whimpered.

"I have… a friend." I say with a sigh. "And her friend is this guy's fiance… it's - it's all a little complicated." I wave it off with a sigh. "But she needs me here right now."

"What? A girl?" She asked with shock. The last time she saw me was after my angel… after my angel left me.

I quickly nodded my head, my frustration pooling into my eyes as I got ready to explain yet another aspect of my life that I really didn't want too - but very luckily, I heard someone call out my name.

"Beau Swan!"

I turned and marching up to me fast was Sam. She looked angry. Her glare was bone chilling, and I could see in her shoulders that she was barely holding back from shifting right here and now - and it looked like I was gonna be the first thing she hunted. "Where is Elliot?" She demanded quietly.

I could hear Renee gasp behind me, clearly intimated by the wild looking woman - and I had to agree. If I wasn't a vampire, I probably would've been running for the hills.

I looked over my shoulder at mom and I made a quick decision. I would rather risk helping a pissed off werewolf, than I would wanna answer any more of her invasive questions.

"Room 202, here, let me show you the way." I said, smiling with what was hopefully a pleasant look. I couldn't be sure, because between mom's interrogation, and Sam's glare of death, it was difficult to tell if I could muster up a good look right now.

I quickly turned to my mom, and said. "I'm gonna help out my friend here. Do you think you can wait for Charlie to come back?" I looked at the clock on the wall, it's been a couple of hours since the fire, and Charlie was probably done wrapping it all up. He was fast like that when it came to being Chief Swan.

"Yeah baby, go." She said pulling me down and kissing my head.

I nodded to her one last time and then gestured to Sam to follow, who had been very impatiently waiting for me to finish fending Renee off. She was standing stone still, but her breathing was fast, and erratic.

I didn't wanna make her any angrier, so I made sure to walk fast, really fast. Sam kept up like it was nothing, her steps as silent as mine. It was almost spooky how quiet she and the rest of the pack could be. The idea that maybe they could catch me unaware at any second of any day…

Thinking about it though - it made me a little excited that I was able to be this quiet. That my steps couldn't be heard by any living soul beyond the wolves, and other vampires. I remember a time - a couple of weeks ago… about a week ago, that I would trip over thin air, and it was amazing that I didn't have to deal with that ever again.

Couple my unnatural balance with my upgraded speed and we got to the room fast, barely going over a minute before we reached his door. I took a very fast step to the side and held out a hand, offering for her to go first. She didn't bother knocking, she bursted in.

"Sam." Elliot cried happily, seeing his fiance burst in. I watched as she flew over to his bed and pressed her lips to his, holding each other tightly. Jules looked like she was really uncomfortable, sitting next to him, with her feet propped up on the edge of the bed. Slowly, she eased back, letting her feet flop onto the tiled floor.

I don't… Well, I do know why it was hard to watch this. They looked so happy together, to be with one another… safe… and happy.

I had to look away… it hurt seeing something so… loving. I took a deep breath, and leaned against the door frame, keeping my eyes on the ground as I tried to tune out their whispers and promises of love. After a second of listening, I felt a hand slip into mine and pull me away from the room.

"Come on Beau." Jules said softly, nodding to the hall. I grinned, and quickly followed, letting the pain in my chest dull as she dragged me out.

"So - think she'll like me a bit better after all of this?" I asked her, mostly joking, as we walked down the hall together.

"Probably not," Jules said with a light laugh, "She still probably hates you on principle… I kinda do too - it's not something we can really help. But she'll probably think twice before eating you now… probably." She ended with an assured nod. It sounded like she didn't doubt herself, but I could still hear that little bit of worry at the tail end there.

It might not have been the best reassurance, but it made me feel confident that at the very least, I had a much better chance that I was not going to have to run from a pack of angry wolves any time soon.

In any case, it was a good distraction. I can still feel the painful stabbing of fiery knives being shoved into my chest… even if it's starting to not feel as bad, with Jules's hand in mine, and the feeling of accomplishment that I helped save lives. That along with the constant threat of being torn to shreds finally starting to ease, I felt suitably content.

The pain would always be there, but at least I could endure it.

And if I couldn't… at least I'll have the fall back of just going insane.

I turned my head to the side just slightly, and there walking with her arm wrapped around mine was my angel. Her beautiful self walked ethearly, as she'd always done - the waves of her hair lightly bobbing with each step, and her smile… it was almost blinding. My own smile… it turned a little sadder as my angel laid her head on my shoulder.

I could live with this.

"Wanna head home Beau?" Jules asked after a second, guiding me out one of the many back doors of the hospital, and pulling me from my thoughts. I snapped my attention back to Jules, and squeezed her hand, nodding my head.

"Yeah, let's get out of here." I said quietly, "I haven't had a single break since I died." I said with a huffing breath of a laugh. Jules flinched a little, but kept her smile in place. "Sorry," I whispered. She just kinda shook her head, and walked with me down the hall.

I could feel both of their hands in mine… both of these parts of my life… they were my everything.

There was no question by this point that Jules was vital to me—there were so many things I loved about her, so many things I wasn't exactly sure what I would do if I lost. When my angel had left, I'd become something like Captain Nemo. I'd dived deep into the ocean, cutting myself off from the world. But when I'd surfaced to breathe, I'd run into Jules. And I felt if I lost her now, I wouldn't just dive down to the depths of the ocean again—my entire ship would sink.

However, I also knew only too well that what I was doing wasn't fair. Jules knew I needed her, and I liked to think she needed me too now, even if I was a vampire… if I was the thing that she was meant to hunt.

I liked to think I brought some light to her new dark world the same way she did mine. But I knew this best-friends thing couldn't just go on indefinitely. It wasn't right. Jules was a werewolf, but she was a normal girl, too, and she must want to find love and happiness—if I wasn't going to give it to her, then I shouldn't keep standing here, where I might be blocking the way of someone else. Someone who would give her a love and happiness that was far more complete.

The way things stood now, what I was doing wasn't fair. So I had to make a decision—either step back and make way for someone else... or let myself be to Jules what she wanted me to be. Love her—at least in the way which it was left for my depressed self to love.

If I did take that step, I wasn't about to go into it half-cocked. I had to commit myself absolutely, just as I had committed myself following that strange evening in Port Angeles.

I'd have to commit every single broken piece of me. It would be the only fair thing to do.

First, there couldn't be any more lingering secrets between us. I would have to tell her everything, from the beginning. I would have to tell the truth, just how deep the wounds went, how messed up I really was. I'd have to tell her about the delusions I'd been having, how I'd been seeking them out - how I'd let them become a vital part of my psyche.

I would even have to be honest that I wasn't sure if I'd ever really completely get over the one that had left.

I knew some of those things would be painful for her to hear. But somehow, I knew. I knew she'd accept me in spite of everything.

This wouldn't be about trying something out to see if it worked. Once I had decided to do this, that would be it. Would I do it, though? Could I?

I felt my angel squeeze my hand reassuringly… like she was urging me to make the right choice. I turned slightly and I saw her beautiful eyes, begging me… like she'd always done. To be happy. To be safe.

But as usual… I don't know if I could listen to her. Jules was a part of my life - it was set in stone, and I… I did… I cared for her. But if I go and commit myself to her, like I'd done with my angel… I'm not sure I could do it without hurting Jules.

I looked over at the girl in question. She seemed happy. Content as our arms swung lightly between the two of us, or hands still glued together as we walked leisurely through the hospital. Which worried me a bit - Renee was still lurking around somewhere, Charlie too if he got there soon. I let the go fast, instead, I focused on her.

She was beautiful, smart, and kind. She deserved the best. Could I be the best for her when…

I looked back over at my angel. I could tell - silently, she was urging me to go for it, to be happy. Though she wasn't saying anything.

It was like she was worried her voice would draw me back into her vision… it probably would. Everything about my angel drew me into her - and that was the problem.

I don't think I can give these delusions up. I'd considered it when I'd been human, the danger, the risk of dying and leaving Charlie behind, of leaving Jules - it was selfish.

Now though, I was a part of my angel's world forever… I can't die, and… I don't know that even if I wanted them to go that they would. Being a vampire - it kinda seems to lock someone in a permanent perfection, as they are when they're human. Does that mean that these hallucinations were permanent? Physically etched into my immortal brain to walk with me forever.

I guess the question is… if I can at least try to give them up - to be what Jules needs me to be… would I?

I got us to the truck quickly, making sure to go out a side entrance in an effort to dodge Renee, and Charlie if he was around here somewhere. I really didn't need another lecture, or more distraught and worried looks. Not if they were about my physical well being; because I have had enough of that to last me the rest of my eternity.

I quickly held the door open for Jules, who snorted at my chivalry, and then rushed around to the drivers side - maybe using a bit of my speed to hurry. I had my eyes on the hospital the whole time, worried that one of them might come rushing out, and now the more I thought about it the worse it became.

I was so focused that when I opened my door, Jules was sitting in my seat, holding the mangled steering wheel, and looking down at me smugly, as though she were proud that she could still take me off guard.

"Mind if I drive?" She asked, her eyes sparkling with mischief. Though the tone of her voice told me that it wasn't actually a question. Rolling my eyes, I rushed back around to the passenger side and hopped in.

"You know, you could just accept that I want to be a gentleman sometimes." I say with a grin. She turned the key and started the truck up, but before she could press the gas,she grabbed my arm and dragged me across the seat. Roughly, she laughed and moved my arm around her shoulder.

"I'm not complaining about it," she said, leaning into me. Finally, she started going, pulling out of the lot as I held her tight.

It was a quiet ride for the first five minutes, both of us just enjoying the silence, and just being with each other.

But I noticed that we weren't headed to the reservation, and my chivalry reared its head again. "Wait. How are you going to get home?" I asked accusingly, not liking that she was planning on walking. Even if she could run home as a wolf.

"I'm not going home Beau. We still haven't caught the blood sucker, remember?"

I felt a shudder run through me as the thought of her getting into a fight with Victor came back.

"Sam was gonna be there, but with Elliot still in the hospital. She wants us to patrol in pairs of two."

"When did she say all that?"

"While I was waiting with Elliot, and your mom was freaking out."

I shook my head, not liking the idea whatsoever. "No. No that's not okay Jules. You guys were already talking about how bad it would be with just you and Sam." The arm I had around her shoulder got a bit tighter as I thought about all the horrific ways she could get hurt.

"Shouldn't you all just wait for Sam to get back?" I ask hopefully.

"No can do. If there's a leech out there, then we gotta be ready to stop it."

I pursed my lips, thinking quickly, "Then let me come with, that way you can have some… backup." I said lamely. I couldn't fight, not even a little, but I'd rather be with her and trying to help, then stuck at home pretending that everything was okay.

"No can do hero, we still don't have an official treaty. The others wouldn't let you." It was easy to hear the unheard ending of that. She wouldn't want me going either.

I was silent for another second. There wouldn't be any arguing that. The treaty with the wolves was fragile, and I didn't want to mess it up. "Then at least call me okay… if you guys need help. Seriously." I said, laying my head on top of hers as we drove down the streets.

I could feel her nod her head.

I let out a small relieved breath. I could hear her heartbeat, and it was calm… or at least calm for one of the wolves. I decided that meant she wasn't lying - if for no other reason then giving myself a little peace of mind.

I resisted a laugh. Peace of mind. Good one.

We drove in another comfortable silence, all the way back to my house, and leaving me to that endless conundrum of thought.

I knew for a fact that I couldn't live without Jules now - I cringed away from even the idea of it. She'd become essential to my survival, literally in a few cases. But to leave things the way they were… was that cruel, just like McKalya had accused?

And on top of that, would it really be so wrong to make her happy? Even if the love I knew she wanted from me was nothing more than an echo of what it could be?

Even if my heart was going to be in a constant state of thirst for my angel?

Even if I was a vampire?

Could she even really love me still? I mean she said that she would actually hate me - that it was ingrained in her as a wolf, but that we could be ok. Could that really amount to love?

Why were decisions so annoying? Why did I have to pick anything? If the universe thought it should try and balance out my luck with giving me this, then I would tell it a very firm no thank you. I hate picking things. Especially important things… and this would honestly be one of the most important decisions I would ever make.

Jules stopped the truck in front of my house, cutting the engine so it was dead silent. The sun started to go down and cloaked it in a litany of shadows from the forest.

I could feel her relaxing into me, snuggling into my chest as she held my hand, keeping me glued to her. Again, this felt nice. Almost… it almost felt like I was alive again, and not being emotionally tormented.

I thought she'd be thinking of Elliot, or Sam, or Victor, but then she spoke, and her tone was apologetic. "Sorry. I know you don't feel exactly the way I do Beau. I swear I don't mind. I'm just so glad that you're okay." She let out a relieved laugh, saying, "I could sing honestly - but no one would wanna hear that."

My breathing stopped, making my throat close up.

Wouldn't my angel, indifferent as she might be… as much as she might not care, wouldn't she want me to be as happy as possible? Wouldn't enough friendly emotion linger for her to want this much for me?

I had to resist a snort. It's not her really that I was trying to convince.

This was all me. She didn't care - didn't love me… so why did it feel like I was betraying her? There was nothing to betray.

She wouldn't care if I loved a hundred different women. Not that it would be the same kind of love. The obsessive, heart wrenching, love that I would never let go of for her.

Jules ran a hand down my chest, seemingly content as we sat here in silence.

If I turned my face just a little bit down - if I kissed her… I knew without any doubt what would happen. It would be easy. There wouldn't need to be a single explanation.

But again - did I have the capability? Could I betray the stupid hole in my chest?

I felt a little sick. Which is so stupid for a vampire, but I guess that was just a me thing and not an undead creature thing. Like everything else, it was just in my head.

But then… with her nowhere in sight, my angel's velvet voice whispered in my ear.

"Be happy Beau" she begged.

I jumped.

Jules felt it, and automatically pulled away from me, reaching for the door.

I was a hair's breadth from grabbing her again, telling her to wait - even as I was reeling from hearing my angel. But she'd already opened the door.

Storm-cooled air blew through the cab of the truck.

"OH!" The breath whooshed out of Jules like someone had hit her. "Holy crap!"

I wasn't much better. The scent blew past me just the same.

Vampire.

Another vampire was in my house. Where Charlie slept.

Jules slammed the door of the truck, and gripped the steering wheel, her hands shaking so hard that I didn't know how she'd managed from not ripping the poor thing off.

Though I was more surprised at myself, because I wasn't very far behind her in terms of emotion. I could feel my hackles rising, a deep snarl in my throat as I thought about who it was in there, just waiting for me… or for Charlie, or Renee. My family.

Jules' eyes were wild as she stared at my house. She barely seemed aware of the tremors that were rolling through her body. It took her a second, but finally she calmed down.

"Let's get out of here." She grunted, turning the keys ignition. The engine caught with a roar this time, turning toward our only escape. Though as we turned around - sitting so innocently on the opposite side of the street was a car. A car I knew.

"Wait! Wait wait!" I gasped, but Jules was already tearing down the street, pushing my truck faster than I thought possible.

That car was one I'd seen a hundred times. In reality and in my dreams. It was a black Mercedes - it was Carine's car.

"Stop!" I cried again, louder this time, "hold on!"

"Beau! You can't fight! And I don't have the rest of the pack!" She said quickly, trying to explain why it wouldn't be a good idea to take on the vampire she thought was in my house.

"It's not Victor! It's… it's Carine!" I said with awe, turning around in my seat to look out the back window. It was real, it was actually here, sitting there like it had never gone away in the first place.

Jules expression melted, turning into a frozen look of apprehension - and just a bit of horror. The truck slowed down, but it didn't stop.

Her look was one of complete ice now.

Her whole body was vibrating.

"Hey, Jules," I said, putting a hand on her shoulder, elation running through me as I grinned with relief. "There's no danger, ok… it's just Carine."

I could feel her tense under my grip, as if my cold hand was just a reminder of what was waiting in my home.

"I just want to see what she's doing here. She's probably tying up a few loose ends." I tried really, really hard to keep my look indifferent. But I knew I was failing miserably. I was overjoyed, completely and utterly.

Jules sat there for a second, staring out the windshield - then she spun to face me. The look she gave, it would be one that haunted me for a long time. I could see in her eyes a war - fury, disgust… betrayal.

I watched as she kept a tight grip on the wheel, her whole body vibrating. "How do you know it's not a trick?" She choked out.

"If Victor could get this close, he wouldn't have bothered stealing Carine's car… it's not a trick." I nodded, completely sure. "It's Carine."

Jules teeth ground together. "Even if it is, it's still a vampire in there. And you want to go back?"

"Jules." I said softly, taking her hand. "I'm a vampire." I reminded.

"You're different!" She roared. I only shook my head.

"No. Jules I'm not… if anything, Carine is the exact same as me. She's never hurt a single human in her life." I said with a pleading voice. "And… I… I have so many questions."

Jules glared at me hard, just sitting there.

"Jules, I've been completely alone in this," I said, gesturing to myself with a tiny wave. "I need help."

"You've been fine Beau! You don't need help!" She tried to convince me, squeezing my hand tight. "You're not one of them! You don't need anything from those filthy blood suckers!"

"Please," I begged, pressing my lips to her knuckle. "She is the kindest, wisest woman in the world… She can help make sure that I really will never hurt anyone. Please - take me back,"

I watched as tears gathered in the corners of Jules's eyes. Her jaw clenched hard as she shook her head. She was silent for a minute.

"Take yourself back." She spat. It was like a punch to the gut. She roughly tore her hand out of mine, put the truck in neutral, and she jumped out, stomping towards the forest.

I quickly jumped out after her. "Wait, Jules! Please!"

I choked on the words, and I didn't know what I could say. Sorry for betraying you. Sorry for being what I am.

My voice made her stop. She looked back at me and this time, her expression was more sullen than angry.

"Look Beau" she said with the same hard voice. "I can't go back. Treaty or no treaty… that's… that is my mortal enemy in there."

She turned away from me before I could say anything. "I have to tell the others. Sam has to know. This changes everything… if they're back then we cant be caught on their territory."

"It's not like that! This isn't war!"

"Hope you don't die." She said quickly, before turning and running into the forest. I saw her body vibrating - and then a second later as she got a good twenty yards into the woods, she shifted, turning into a wolf and bolting away.

I stood there for a minute. Remorse pinning me in place. My hands clenched at my sides.

I was a complete and utter jerk. Someone who strung people along, just to betray them at the drop of a hat. To hurt them as soon as it was convenient for me to feel better.

I needed to fix this.

But… I couldn't. Not right now. As much as it made me hate myself even worse, the pain of hurting Jules was pushed to the back of my mind as I remembered the black car sitting just down the street.

I will fix this, just as soon as I see Carine. I would make it up to her, I promised myself. I hopped back into the truck and quickly spun it around in a maneuver I never could have pulled off as a human.

It was darker than usual when I pulled back into the drive. Charlie must have forgotten to turn the porch light on when he went to pick mom up. It would've made it eerie if I couldn't see through the dark.

Though as I slammed my door shut, I thought that Jules could be right. What if this was a trick? What if Victor was in there, waiting for me?

I took a breath. Well, if he was, he was certainly going to have his hands full. I rolled my shoulders and walked up to the door. I pushed the key and, and warily looked inside, taking a step through the threshold.

I was quiet. As quiet as I could be as I silently shut the door.

Someone was definitely here. I couldn't hear them… but I smelled them.

Just as I was about to reach for the lightswitch, I felt a presence suddenly at the end of the hall. The light flicked on.

And I saw someone standing there at the end of the hall, waiting for me.

Sorry if I didn't edit this one quite as well as usual. I'm feeling a little under the weather, and I've got work tomorrow, but I didn't want to make anyone wait too long before reading the next chapter. So I posted it today. I hope you enjoy. :)

Also, as usual, please do check out my profile if you want to see some more of My Angel - it would super help me out!