Holy crap, I'm sorry I'm late with this one gang! I completely dropped the ball with my time!

Ugh, none the less, I hope you enjoy...

(Also, next chapter is one of my favorites! I seriously cannot wait for you to read it gang)

Kuro: Can I be the hamburglar haha

I dropped the deer that was hanging limply in my hands, my lips covered in the red. I was sure that I looked like a maniac because of how hard I was grinning.

I couldn't help it. This was all just too easy, and it made me feel confident. A little more sure of myself.

This was the second time I'd ever been hunting, and it was by far a much better experience. Having someone there to help show you how to do it - to really explain how our senses worked in tandem with our other abilities - it made this so much easier, yes, but it also made it way more fun.

"So, I know you already told me everything," Archie said, casually walking up to me, his hands in his pockets as he smiled along with me. "But… you really didn't kill anyone while we were gone?" His tone was curious, and maybe a bit weary, but it was mostly full of relief. He'd just finished off his own deer, about a mile back somewhere.

"Nope. I haven't hurt a single human." I said proudly. Which was weird, I wasn't proud of many things in regards to myself. I didn't usually do much that I could be proud of.

"I knew it." Archie whispered with a bitter chuckle, talking to himself as leaned back against a tree.

"Knew what?" I asked, wiping the blood off my chin as I stood up. He looked at me with a triumphant expression now, as if he'd won some kind of prize.

"I knew that you were meant to be one of us." He laughed smugly, tapping his head with his finger.

"None of them believed me." He continued, waving away the doubts I'm sure all his family threw at him. Which sucked because I was sure that they all had very good reasons to doubt. None of them were ever gonna change me. They didn't want me to be a part of their family. Particularly one.

As usual, the fiery pain that hit my chest came back at the thought. I didn't let it show on my face though - probably because of how good I'd got at controlling my facial features these past few weeks.

What I couldn't help though was a little flinch.

I felt my angel running a hand along my arm. I looked at her in the corner of my eye, and she was giving me a sad little look. She didn't say a word as she casually let her arms wrap around mine.

"You okay?" Archie asked softly. Quickly I looked up at him, and his smug look had turned into one of pity.

"Yeah man, I'm good." I said, giving him the best smile I could muster. Honestly, it felt like the one I'd been giving everyone else since I got back. The one I gave a human who threw a 'are you okay' pity look at me.

I don't think it fooled Archie, but he nodded his head. His lips pursed as he stared at me hard.

"Well, I think I'm done," I said, looking back down at my dead prey. It was the third deer I'd had today, and I didn't realize how badly I needed to hunt, because the ache in my throat went down significantly with each kill. "How about you?"

"Yeah… I'm finished." Archie said, shoving off the tree, and walking back in the direction of my house. He was obviously thinking hard again. Trying to figure out what to do with me I supposed.

I think I'll just let him figure that one out by himself. Afterall, whatever he decides to do, it probably won't involve his family.

Well, maybe Carine will come visit, just to see if I needed any kind of help. She was nice like that. The others though, they probably wouldn't want to step foot here if they knew I was a vampire now.

That probably also meant that Archie himself was gonna have to go home, and very likely, he'd have to do that soon. He had Jessamine waiting for him after all. So, now would probably be the best time to get the big questions out of the way.

"Hey Archie," I said, interrupting him from his musings. "Do you know how long it'll take for my eyes to uh… turn gold?" I asked, rubbing the back of my head. I didn't really know how to ask without sounding weird.

"It takes a couple of months, you have to hunt a couple of times." He said, not bothering to look at me. The gears in his head were unable to stop turning as he answered. I just nodded.

Thinking about it, it already has been a while, and if a couple of times meant twice, then maybe they've already turned gold! (Which of course, I knew they hadn't, but I could hope) I could take a break from wearing these stupid contacts… well at least in places where no one knew me. I'll have to check when we get back.

I felt my angel kiss my cheek, and as subtly as I could, once again, I turned my eyes to her. She was smiling, her dimples on full blast. I guess she was happy that I was excited.

I wish she'd talk. I haven't heard her voice in a while.

Instantly, that made another question pop into my head.

I took a deep breath. "Does - does she…" this was really hard to get out. "Does Edyt… does she know you're here?" I asked, unable to get my angel's name out. Even trying hurt - but he knew who I meant instantly.

"No. If she did, she'd bite my head off," He mumbled, still in his own world, but this time cringing as he imagined whatever horror my angel would inflict on him.

But there was only one way that could be true - that she didn't already know about all of this. "She's not with Carine and Earnest?"

"She checks in every few months. She's been off doing who knows what," He said, rolling his eyes.

"Oh." She must be out enjoying her distractions. Distractions she said that a vampire would enjoy… it made me a little more curious to know if that was something I could partake in now? Though the burning fire eating at me inside didn't want to think about it right now. I decided it was best to move my curiosity onto safer topics.

"You said you flew here right? Where did you come from?"

"I was in Denali with the others… We were all spread out, kinda doing our own thing for a bit, but we're all back together now," He said, and I could hear the relief in his voice. "That's when I got my vision," He said, finally looking at me. "Jess didn't want me to go… we all swore that we wouldn't interfere with you anymore." He said giving me a look that screamed regret. "But I've always been the worst at keeping my promises."

I was about to ask for an explanation of what that meant when he started running back to the house. I gave a huff, throwing my hands up and letting them fall back. Was this how Archie got out of every conversation he didn't like.

I started running after him, easily catching up. I would've beaten him there by minutes, but I kept pace with him.

We stopped right before we hit the tree line, "You're sure Charlie isn't gonna mind me being here?" He asked, sounding worried as he followed me into the back door.

"He probably won't be back for a while, but yeah, I'm sure… he'll be happy to see you again." I said, giving him a grin as I shut the door. I paused after saying that. I could smell two people walking up to the front door; I could hear them talking. It was Charlie and Renee.

"Nevermind then." I muttered, shaking my head at myself. Archie gave me a little worried look. "I meant about them getting home. He adores you." I said fast, sheepishly smiling as I walked to the front, getting there just as the door was opening.

He trudged in, dead on his feet with his shoulders hunched, and holding the door open for Renee to walk past. He didn't see me quite yet, but she did, her eyes lit up and she quickly walked up, giving me a big hug.

"Hi mom," I muttered, hugging her back as gently as I could. I could hear Archie letting out a little breath of worry, still lingering by the backdoor as he watched me.

I got a small, happy hi back from Renne, before I asked, "Hey dad - is everyone ok at the hospital?"

He gave a tired nod, smiling at me as he took his jacket off. "Yeah kid, yeah." He mumbled, pulling out a stack of envelopes from his back pocket. "No one's seriously hurt. Most of them actually went home… but not before a couple of them gave me these."

I could easily read the colorful envelopes, all with crayon and marker drawings on each one, all of them addressed to me in scribbled handwriting.

"Uh - what are those?" I asked with a touch of worry.

"Well, some of those people you saved had kids… families, and they wanted to say thank you." Charlie said, pride leaking into his voice as he held them out for me to take. Renee let me go, and shuffled back, her bright eyes turning into a look of admiration.

It was difficult to see. I've never… no one's ever looked at me like this. Talk to me this way. Almost shakily, I grabbed the stack.

"Thanks," I mumbled, getting a little nod in return from Charlie as I sifted through them. There were roughly a dozen. A dozen different families that I helped. That I saved.

None of them would have to lose a loved one. None of them would have to go through the pain of separation.

It was hard to breathe.

"Beau?" Renee asked concerned. I quickly cleared my throat, and sent them a smile. I put the letters in my back pocket. I would be reading those later, when I had a bit more privacy.

"I'm good - Um - uh dad," I said, thinking it'd be best to warn them. "You'll never guess who showed up."

He looked at me confused, his tired look still hard on his face, and the pride still glowing in his eyes as he watched me, waiting to ask what I meant.

With what I was sure was an elated expression, I took a step to the side, and let them see Archie, who finally came up the hallway, giving a tiny wave.

"Hi Chief," He said, trying to keep his tone light, "Hi Mrs. Dwyer. Sorry if this was a bad time."

"Archie Cullen?" he peered at the slight figure in front of him as if he doubted what his eyes were telling him. "Archie is that you?"

"Yeah, I was just kinda in the neighborhood and I thought I'd drop by," He said, looking between Charlie and Renee.

"Is Carine…?"

"Ah no, I came by myself." He said. Everyone in the room knew Charlie wasn't actually asking about Carine.

"Is it ok if he hangs out here for a while?" I pleaded. "I kinda already asked him."

"Of course," Charlie said, Renee looking at him with a bit of worry. "We'd love to have you… it'll be good for Beau to have a friend around for a bit. I'll be busy the next couple of days helping with the clean up at the store."

"What is there left to do?" I asked quietly.

Charlie rubbed his eyes, and it made me regret asking. Obviously, this wasn't the time.

But he gave me a smile, and patted my shoulder. "Nothing too much left. Tomorrow, I gotta go back to the hospital and get the last few people settled, get a couple more statements, then I just gotta help the fire department with their investigation a bit. It won't take longer than… two, three days."

He gave another tired sigh, and started unbuttoning his uniformed shirt. "Now, I'm gonna go make myself some dinner."

Before I could say a firm no to that plan - because after everything I've put him through, especially today, he would not be making his own dinner, Renee beat me to it. "Uh huh, and what are you gonna be making? A sandwich?" She asked with a light giggle, shaking her head. She grabbed his hand and led him to the kitchen.

"What's wrong with a sandwich?" He asked defensively.

"What's wrong is that both of my boys went and helped a lot of people out of a really tough spot! You are not going to be getting anything other than your favorite meal." She said, wagging a finger at him before disappearing with Charlie into the kitchen. I could hear my dads heart beat getting a bit faster. I could practically feel his happiness.

It almost made me feel like my constant cloud of depression was… not leaving, but maybe turning into a really, really dark gray, rather than being pitch black.

For the first time… in a really long time, I felt my usually fake smile, turning into a real one. Well, not real, but it was the closest I'd ever gotten to it. Even more so than when I was with Jules.

Which was not a reminder that helped right now.

"It'll be ready in an hour Beau! Your friend is staying for dinner right?" My hectic mom asked, popping her head around the corner again, giving Archie and I a big grin. "You are invited of course," She said, addressing Archie directly.

"Oh no, I wouldn't want to trouble you," He said smoothly, smiling as he shook his head.

"Oh absolutely not! Please, it would be amazing to have a friend of Beau's eating with us." She said, stepping into clear view now, giving Archie her puppy dog eyes. It took all of two seconds for him to give in.

"I guess I could stay for dinner," He said, grinning ruefully and walking after her. Renee gave a quick cheery noise and turned back into the kitchen.

"You guys go ahead, I'm gonna go put these up." I said, pulling out the letters Charlie gave me, and giving them a small wave. Archie gave me a thumbs up, and went to sit down with my family.

With no eyes on me, I used my speed to sprint up the stairs, not making a single sound as I gracefully ascended to the second floor. It was hard not laughing like a loon everytime I went that fast, and actually managing to not trip on anything.

Carefully, I shut my door, and walked over to my desk. I wanted to make this fast, and get back to Archie… I didn't know how long I could stall him before he headed back home, and I needed to make the best of it while he's here.

But, I was curious about these letters, and I don't think a couple of minutes will really change anything.

Quickly, I shuffled through them again, smiling as I read the little notes scribbled on the envelopes. All of which had the hospital's logo on it. I guess the nurses or something went put this all together. It made me feel warm.

Gently, I opened the first one, praying that I didn't tear the whole thing up. This was one of the few that didn't have a bunch of crayon and marker all over it - so I could assume it was one that wasn't created by a family with kids. Inside was a single piece of paper, with a hand written note from the… Desmond's.

It was a short message, with a fancier scrawl than you'd typically see.

Hello Mr. Swan,

Thank you so so so much for keeping our family safe. While this has been the most horrific thing my husband and I have ever gone through, it was a blessing to have been rescued from it by you. Your father told me that he's never been prouder when he was making his rounds with all the people caught in the store. If you ever need anything from the Desmonds, (we own the little bakery down on maple road) then please let us know, and we'd be glad to thank you in person.

Thank you! Again, so much!

Janet and Alec Desmond

My smile almost hurt. I quickly opened the next one after carefully putting the first down. This one was a purple envelope, with crayon drawings of a family, all of which were stick figures.

Hi Mr. Beau!

My names John! You saved me and my mom from the fire! Thank you! She told me I should write a bunch about how lucky we are that you were there, but my wrist hurts a lot when I write, so I drew you a picture!

Underneath the heart warming message was a surprisingly well done doodle of… what I think was me? Saving them? I wasn't sure, but I loved it with all my heart. Under the picture, there was another tinier message, obviously from little John's mom. It was written with a pen, and had much better handwriting.

Thank you again! We didn't know how lucky we were to have the chief's son there to save the day!

Maria and John Thatcher

I was going to hang these up, definitely. If there was ever going to be anything I was proud of in this life, then this was it. This… this was worth living for.

"I'm so proud Beau," My angel whispered in my ear, laying her head on my shoulder, and wrapping her arms around my waist, hugging me. That made me feel even better.

My dad telling me how proud he was, these letters, they were all amazing. But hearing my angel telling me that I'd done a good job… that she was proud. Even though I knew it wasn't real, it filled me with a joy I didn't even know I had anymore.

I was about to tear open the next one, but Archie's voice from downstairs stopped me. His voice was so low that I barely caught it.

"Ok… how bad was it?" He asked softly, but serious. For half a second, I thought he might be talking about the fire, or maybe me getting lost in the woods… again.

Charlie sighed, and I could hear Renee slowing down on her cooking. "It was bad."

"Tell me about it. I want to know exactly what happened after we left."

There was a pause while a cupboard door closed, and the dial on the stove was clicked to a lower setting. A part of me wanted to run down there and get everyone off that topic, but I knew that eventually, Archie would find out. Someone would tell him.

And besides… I was slightly curious myself. The last months of me being human where… hazy. I was constantly underwater, while being tortured with fire. I couldn't tell up from down, and I could barely function.

It was so bad, so intense, that even with my blurry memories from after the change, I still remembered the worst of it.

"I don't think I've ever felt more helpless," Charlie said bluntly, but slowly. "I didn't know what to do. I… I went through something similar when Renee left," He said with a grunt. I knew from experience that that must have been torture to admit in front of her. "Everything was dark for a long time, so I wasn't surprised when he reacted like that - how deeply affected he was."

I heard Renee let out a whimper. It made me want to crawl into a hole.

"But Beau… he's - he's a one man army. Always going forward, never bending or deviating from the course… but he's brittle. Unbendable. It's why he's always been such a reliable kid - I could always trust him to be responsible."

I heard him huff, "but this - this broke him. Completely."

There was a little lull in the conversation. Renee flipped over the steaks on the stove, but her breathing was erratic. Charlie was tapping a finger against the table. I could picture so clearly how stressed he was right now.

Archie was dead silent, I couldn't even hear him breathing.

"That first week I thought I was going to have to hospitalize him. He wouldn't eat. Wouldn't drink. He didn't even move. Dr. Gerandy was throwing around words like 'catatonic,' but I didn't let him up to see him. I was worried that a doctor would just make it worse. That it would break him more, or - or scare him."

"He seems better now… what did you do?" Archie asked softly.

"I came by," Renee chimed in, putting something down on the counter with a thump. "I… Charlie called and asked me to come take him back to Florida, but he…" She trailed off, sniffling.

There was another little silence.

"Well, I called her, hoping that maybe a change would help get him out of his rut, but when we started packing his things, he finally started to move. But only to grab all of his clothes out of the suitcase. All he would say was that he wasn't leaving, that Forks was his home. He was shaking all over - I thought he was gonna pass out right in front of us. I didn't argue with him, neither of us did," He said, to which Renee gave a hum of agrement. "We thought that since he started moving again, that maybe he was getting better. That maybe… hhm, well the threat of leaving was enough to get him out of it. And… he did seem like he was getting better at first…"

Charlie trailed off. It was hard listening to this, knowing how much pain I'd caused him.

"But," Archie asked softly.

"It was… different. He went back to school and work, he ate, and slept, and did his homework. He would answer when someone talked directly to him. But he was… empty. His eyes were blank. There were lots of little things - he wouldn't listen to music anymore; I found a bunch of broken CDs in the trash. He didn't read; he wouldn't be in the same room when the TV was on, not that she watched it so much before. I finally figured it out - he was avoiding everything that might remind him of… her.

"We stopped talking to each other; I was worried about saying something that would upset him - the littlest things would make him flinch - and he never started any conversations. He would only answer if I asked him something.

"He was alone. All of the time. He didn't call his friends back, and after a while, they stopped calling.

"It was like… like living with… like with a veteran. It wasn't like a girl had left him, it'd been like someone died. He would wake up screaming every night… or vomiting."

It was like someone died - like I died. In more ways than one. Because it had been more than just losing my angel, as if that wasn't enough to put me in the ground. It was also losing a whole future, a whole family - the whole life that I'd chosen…

I could hear Renee plating the food, even as she obviously tried to fight tears back. I could smell the salty tears. The heavy silence between Archie and Charlie made me want to run. I sighed. I hadn't fooled anyone at all, not for a second.

"I'm so sorry, Charlie," Archie said, voice weighed down with guilt.

"It's not your fault kid." The way he said it made it perfectly clear that he was holding someone responsible. "You've always been a good friend to Beau."

"He seems better now, though."

Another pause in the conversation.

"For a while… yeah, I thought so too. For the last couple of months, he was hanging out with Julie Black. He'd come back home happier, with some color in his cheeks, and some light in his eyes." He paused again, and his voice was different when he spoke again. It was thought it was physically hard for him to say the words. "But I don't know. A few weeks back… he got lost."

I heard Renee grab the plates and put them on the table before she sat down herself. No one touched their food though.

"I… he went into the woods, just going on a hike, and he got lost. He was gone for a little less than a week." He grunted, voice low. "I thought… I thought that he'd gone and…"

He thought I killed myself. I didn't think it was possible to feel this horrible about myself.

"When we found him - well, when he came back… he was different. He was… confident? But terrified all the time. Like he was scared of something. He doesn't trip on anything anymore, never gets himself hurt, but he's always so careful.

"It's hard to explain. He looks different, he's pale all the time, and cold. He acts differently. But he seems… okay. I don't know. I don't know anymore." Charlie said slowly. This was all just a puzzle to him, one that was impossible to figure out. One that I created, and made to hurt him.

After a minute of silence, Charlie huffed a laugh. "And now, the kids gone and saved people from a burning building, apparently without a second thought - every witness told me that he'd been carrying people out, leading them, and barking orders. Since when did he have the life in him to even think of being able to do that? The Beau I know, would never have been able to do that. Don't get me wrong, I have never been prouder of him, but… what changed?"

"I don't know," Archie muttered.

After another second, Charlie said, "Well I'm worried. I'm scared. He's different, but that lifeless look in his eyes is always there. He is always empty… I see it everytime I look at him. And I don't know what any of it means." I could hear him angrily picking up his fork and spearing his steak.

Charlie went on in a hopeless tone. "I don't know if he's gonna get over it - I'm not sure if it's in his nature to heal from something like this. He doesn't get past things, change his mind. And it feels like it's just getting worse."

"He's one of a kind," Archie agreed in a dry voice.

"And Archie…" Charlie hesitated. "Now, you know how fond I am of you, and I can tell that he's happy to see you, but… I'm a little worried about what your visit's gonna do to him."

"I know," Archie said softly, "I didn't know how bad… I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize kid," He grunted, "You didn't know."

There was a pause in the conversation as forks scraped against plates and Charlie chewed. I sighed, putting the letters in a drawer. I'll have to read them later. I was just about to walk down, but then Charlie asked something else.

"Archie," he said carefully, his voice colder than ever before. "She isn't coming back to town is she?"

It was strange hearing him talk about my angel like that. I'd always assumed he wasn't happy with her… when I thought I was being clever and hiding how much this all hurt. I'd assumed it would be like me bringing up how Renee left him, and he was returning the courtesy of not bringing up how I was dumped. So, the way he was talking was a little alarming.

"No, she doesn't even know I'm here." Archie said, sighing, "The last I spoke to her, she was in South America."

I stiffened as I heard this new information, and listened harder. I was desperate to hear anything about my angel. Obviously.

I could feel her hugging me from behind as I stayed silent, waiting for him to speak, but Charlie said something instead.

"Well I hope she's enjoying herself." He snorted, Renee huffing in agreement.

For the first time, Archie's voice had a bit of steel in it. "I wouldn't make assumptions, Chief." I knew how his eyes would flash when he used that tone.

A chair scooted from the table, scraping loudly across the floor. I pictured Charlie getting up; there was no way Archie would make that kinda noise. The faucet ran, splashing against a dish. "Here, I got it," I heard Charlie mumble, picking up a plate, and bringing it back over to the sink. I'm guessing it was Renees.

It didn't sound like they were going to talk about my angel anymore, so I guess it was time for me to head down.

I opened my door, purposely making it close a bit harder than normal, and I stomped down the stairs, making sure I didn't put a hole in the wood as I went.

Everyone one of them was quiet as I came in, no one quite looking the other in the eye. What I'm sure was a mercy though, was that Charlie had to leave then - he had to drive Renee to her hotel. It would have been an annoyingly long end of the day without Archie. He never spoke about leaving, and I didn't bring it up. I knew that it would happen eventually, but it was something I didn't wanna think about.

Instead, we talked about his family. Of course, all but one.

Carine was working nights in Ithaca and teaching part time at Cornell. Earnest was busy restoring a seventeenth century house, some kind of historical monument, in the forest north of the city. Lauren and Royal had gone to Europe for a few months on another honeymoon - something that they did a lot apparently. Jess was at Cornell too, studying philosophy this time. And Archie had been doing some personal research, trying to figure out all the stuff I uncovered for her last spring.

Well, I say I uncovered, more like the bad guy monologuing right before trying to kill me.

He'd successfully tracked it all down. Apparently, he'd been a patient in an asylum where he spent the last couple of years of his life as a human. A life that he didn't have a single memory of.

"My old name was Mark Archie Brandon," He told me quietly. "I had a little brother named Cory. His son - my nephew - is still alive and kicking in Biloxi."

"Did you find out why they put you in there?" What would drive his parents to such an extreme? Even if your kid was seeing weird… visions? I could only guess what they thought it was.

He just kinda shrugged, looking thoughtful. "I didn't find out much about them. I went through all the old newspapers on a microfiche. My family wasn't mentioned often; they weren't part of the social circles that made the papers. Their engagement was in one, and Cory's." The name sounded foreign on his tongue. "My birth was also there… and my death. I found my grave too." He said with a small grin. "I went and nicked my admission sheet from the old asylum archives. The date on it and the date on my tombstone are the same."

I didn't have a clue on how to respond to that, but thankfully, he moved onto much lighter topics.

The… the Cullens were all reassembled now apparently. Everyone one of them was spending Cornell's spring break in Denali - except for my angel. Of which, Archie didn't say a thing, which sucked. I wanted to hear all about her, I wanted to know every little thing that she was doing. But I also knew how much that would hurt to hear.

It would be torture.

What kind of distractions was she getting into? Was she traveling? Was it some kind of exclusive vampire distraction? Was she… seeing other people?

And that - that hurt like hell. I think that hurt worse than anything. Bar maybe one or two experiences.

The idea that someone else was with my angel. Touching… kissing her. I had to try really hard to not show all this on my face as Archie kept talking, and I was suddenly very grateful that Jess wasn't here.

I couldn't imagine what it would be like for her in particular. Does she feel others' emotions like her own? Or was it more clinical than that? It made me think that them leaving was a good thing, if for no other reason than that.

She'd feel my pain from miles away.

Charlie didn't get back for another hour. Which was still relatively early, it was only about nine now, and he usually went to bed around ten, but obviously today was hard on him. It would probably be worse tomorrow when he had to head back to the hospital in the morning, so he just turned in as soon as he got back. He barely got his good night out through a yawn before he left me and Archie to talk on the couch.

I felt bad for him. But I almost felt worse for myself when I looked back at Archie and saw that he was eyeing me with a serious glint in his eye.

"Ok. I think it's time we got a few things straightened out," He said.

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