Disclaimer: I do not own The Fairly OddParents. This is a fan-made reboot of the original animated series. The Fairly OddParents belong to Nickelodeon and Butch Hartman.
The Fairly OddChildren
Chapter 13 – Two Kids and a Goat
One day at Dimmsdale City Hall, Vicky was chaperoning a bunch of kids including Timmy and Chloe, to see Chompy the Goat, the town hero and mascot. "One side, parasites," said Vicky, pushing the other kids aside to get to the Turner twins. "Ick! I can't believe your parents made me take you on this stupid tour of the City Hall." "They're paying you, aren't they?" said Timmy, reminding her of her babysitting job. "Undies plus gravity equals wedgie!" she said, giving them both wedgies. "Owowowowowowow! I hate it when she does that!" growled Chloe, rubbing her butt in pain from the wedgie. Just then, the mayor of Dimmsdale appeared and continued the tour through City Hall, where they learned all about Chompy's heroic deeds. The mayor opened a glass case and pulled a rope, which opened the curtains and revealed a sad-looking Chompy the goat in his glass case. "What's the big deal? He's just a smelly old goat," said Cosmo, making the kids spit out their water. "Who said that?" snapped the mayor. Cosmo and Wanda exchanged glances and popped their balloon disguises to avoid being detected. "How dare you minimize the importance of Chompy?" Chloe angrily lowered her eyebrows at her brother. "Nice work, beaver boy," she whispered sharply. "The rest of you can head off to the Chompy the Goat gift shop... because it looks SOMEBODY needs a little alone time with our goat hero," said the hero trying to keep cool demeanor. "Uh, Mr. Mayor, sir? Timmy's my brother and if he has to stay behind, THEN SO WILL I!" said Chloe in an annoyed voice. "Very well. Go! Beg Chompy's forgiveness!" he said angrily, pointing at the goat.
Cosmo and Wanda reappeared once the mayor walked away. "For a town hero, he sure looks sad," said Wanda, feeling bad for Chompy. "You think he likes it in there?" "I don't know. I wish I could see what he was thinking," said Timmy, going up to Chompy's glass cage with Chloe. "One goat mind-reading power coming up," said Cosmo, granting Timmy with the ability to read Chompy's mind. Timmy saw that all Chompy wanted was to be free and roam in the wild. Chloe let out a cute smile and thought that was the sweetest thing ever. "I wish Chompy could be free to live wherever his heart desires!" said Chloe. The fairies granted the wish by making the cage rise, allowing Chompy to escape City Hall by use of magic. "Hey, Twerps, time to go," said Vicky, wearing Chompy-themed merchandise. She then pulled Timmy's underwear over his head, blinding his vision. He bumped into Chloe, then Vicky, causing the babysitter to fall on to Chompy's bed.
The mayor was walking with two officers and noticed that Chompy was gone. He then named Timmy and Chloe heroes by blaming Vicky for kidnapping the goat. "Wow. Vicky's going to get blamed for what we did," said Timmy, putting his pink hat back on as Vicky was dragged away by the guards. The twins hi-fived each other, liking the idea that Vicky will have to face punishment. "Don't you think one of you should say something?" asked Wanda, as they exited City Hall. "Well, maybe we should tell the truth about what happened," said Chloe, sweating nervously. The mayor then offered the twins a ride home in Miss Dimmsdale's hovercraft. "Hovercraft," said Chloe in a trance. She shook it off after realizing that it was a form of bribery to keep up the town hero image. "Once you get home, can she give you the shiny new hovercraft?" the mayor asked, handing Timmy the keys. "But, we're only ten! We're not old enough to drive!" said Chloe in a panic. The mayor handed them a ten-and-under town hero driver's license for the occasion. "I call shotgun!" said Cosmo, as he and Wanda disappeared while still disguised as pigeons.
Later that evening, Timmy and Chloe arrived home in the hovercraft that Timmy accidentally damaged trying to Parallel Park between two cars. The two were then chased by a bunch of girls with underwear on their heads, who wanted to auction off their clothes on the internet. They ran inside their house and were greeted by their parents, who were wearing underwear on their heads. "Happy birthday, kids," said Mrs. Turner. "It's not our birthday," said Timmy. "Every day's your birthday when you stop a goatnapper, little heroes," said Mr. Turner, presenting their children with a huge hero cake and lots of presents. Later, the two were eating their cake with Cosmo and Wanda in their room while watching TV. "Thanks for sharing your hero cake with us, you two," said Cosmo with a slice of cake. "Even though you're not really heroes and don't deserve the cake," said Wanda. Cosmo spat out the bite he was eating upon seeing the mayor on TV. "Mr. Mayor, has the goatnapper revealed the whereabouts of Chompy yet?" asked a reporter. "No, but we're giving her an increasingly bad hair day until she talks," said the mayor, answering the question on his podium.
At the Dimmsdale prison, Vicky was locked in a 17th-century pillory, with head and hands sticking out from the wooden boards. She tried explaining that she didn't know where Chompy was, but ending up getting balloons rubbed on her head, causing her hair to stand up, thanks to the static. Cosmo and the twins laughed hysterically at Vicky's predicament. "You're the ones who let Chompy go," said Wanda, reminding them of what happened earlier. "We'll figure out a way to free her as soon as this cake stops tasting so good," said Timmy. Cosmo took a bite and admitted that it still tasted good. Chloe's eyes turned to spirals and started shaking uncontrollably. "Uh-oh! Sugar rush!" She bounced off the walls like rubber ball before going to sleep on the floor. Wanda poured a bucket of water on her, waking her up. "I hate it when that happens," she said. Later that night, the twins were tossing in their sleep, feeling the guilt of letting Chompy go. "Vicky… not guilty… wish," Timmy said in his sleep. He suddenly woke himself up in a start. "Bad dream, bro?" asked Chloe, peering down from her bunk. "Yeah," said Timmy, turning the light on, causing the two of them to scream in terror. He convinced himself that he was still dreaming as a monkey danced on his head while under the covers. He was then met by a fish pirate, causing the twins to land in the water. Cosmo and Wanda were being held by a sea monster. "Thank heavens you two are awake," said Wanda in relief. "What is all this?" he asked. "The two of you have been wishing in your sleep," said Wanda. "And you know the rules. You wish it, we grant it." "I wish this stuff was gone," said Timmy, causing the fairies to turn the room back to normal.
Chloe wiped her forehead and let out a huge sigh of relief. "That was a living nightmare," she said. "OK, we probably ate a little too much hero cake," said Timmy. "Let's just all go back to sleep." They pulled the covers up as Timmy turned off his table lamp, leaving Cosmo and Wanda to glance at each other nervously in the dark. "Wish… goat… Vicky," said Chloe in her sleep. The two woke up in a start and Timmy turned on his lamp, causing the two to scream in horror at the stuff before them. "Why would we wish for this stuff?" asked Timmy. "Maybe your dreams are trying to tell you something," said Wanda. "Maybe we should talk with a psychologist," said Chloe. "That's a great idea," said Wanda. She transformed the room into a psychologist's office. The twins were on the long table, which was Cosmo, and Wanda was the psychologist, complete with an old person look. "Now, let's take a peek at what your subconscious is saying," she said, unscrewing the twins' heads to revealing miniature versions of themselves, representing their subconscious. They explained that they didn't deserve to be heroes and that they were the goatnappers. "Whoa! Time-out! I'm not good with this psycho mumbo jumbo," said Cosmo. "We're sleep-wishing because we feel guilty?" asked Timmy. Just then, their mom called their names outside the room.
Wanda restored the room back to normal and the fairies assumed their goldfish disguise. "Come in, mom," said Chloe from the top bunk. "Are you two kids okay?" she asked, entering their room with her husband. "Yeah, but can I ask you something? You'd still love me even if I wasn't a hero right?" asked Timmy. There was a brief moment of silence until Mrs. Turner admitted that they would still love their kids even if they weren't heroes. "What if, hypothetically, I was the goatnapper?" he asked nervously. "Well, son, then I'd have to do this," said Mr. Turner, letting out a girly scream and fainting. "Hypothetically, of course." "Well, goodnight, kids-whom-I-would-hate-to-discover-was-actually-the-goatnapper," said Mrs. Turner, dragging her husband out of the room. "Timmy, you can't tell them we sent Chompy away now," said Chloe, looking at her brother from her bunk bed. "But what about the dream-wishing?" asked Wanda, as she and Cosmo assumed their fairy forms. "We can't dream if we don't sleep, right?" asked Timmy. "So we'll just stay awake for the rest of our lives." Chloe slapped her hand on her face at the stupid idea. "That is a stupid idea," she admitted. "But, seeing as how we're wishing in our sleep, I guess there's no other option right now." The fairies reassumed their goldfish disguises and went back into the fish bowl.
Two days and nights went by without sleep for the guilty twins. Soon it was Monday and the twins were exhausted from not getting enough sleep. "Is it the rest of our lives yet?" asked Timmy in a daze. "No, Timmy. It's only Monday. The day we go back to school," admitted Chloe. While on the school bus, Cosmo and Wanda were disguised as mice in the twins' backpacks as they sat next to each other. "Guilty… my fault… I wish… RAINING DUCKS!" said Timmy, sleep-wishing. Cosmo and Wanda made a storm of ducks rain outside in Dimmsdale, even while at school. Trixie noticed the twins' predicament and showed some concern. "You look terrible," said the popular girl. "Didn't sleep well over the weekend," said Chloe before falling asleep. "Vicky… not guilty… I wish… SWARM OF LAB MICE!" Cosmo and Wanda granted her wish and made a swarm of lab mice appear in the classroom, causing the other kids except Timmy to freak out. Outside the school on the entrance steps, the twins' eyes were drooping with exhaustion. "We've got to get Chompy back here," said Wanda. "It's only a matter of time before they wish for something really dangerous." "I WISH FOR A GIGANTIC MONSTER THAT WON'T GO AWAY UNTIL WE TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT CHOMPY!" shouted Chloe. Cosmo and Wanda slapped their hands on their faces as they granted the wish, making a giant, red four-armed monster to appear in the city. As it prepared to step on the twins, Timmy wished that they were where Chompy was.
The four of them teleported to an open field outside of Dimmsdale. The twins fell asleep in the field, due to not getting enough sleep from sleep-wishing over the weekend. "I wish… field on fire!" said Timmy. The fairies granted the wish, causing a fire to appear in front of Timmy, only to be put out by Chompy's hoof. The twins woke up and happily gave the town mascot a big hug. "You've got to come back to Dimmsdale." Chompy bleated for his wife and two kids that he met while in the field. "Aw. That's so sweet. He's so happy here that he has a family and kids now," cooed Chloe. "Yeah. We can't take him away from all this just so he can be on display in a stupid pen," said Timmy. "Well, what are you going to do, you two?" asked Cosmo. "What we should've done in the first place," said Chloe. "I couldn't agree more. I wish Chloe and I were at City Hall!" said Timmy. They teleported to the outside of City Hall, where they prepared to tell the truth about what happened to Chompy. Timmy tried to say that he wasn't a hero, but only got more praise from the mayor. "That's it! I can't take this!" said Chloe, shoving her brother aside and taking the stand. "Vicky and didn't make Chompy go away! It was us! We did it!" Back at the Turner house, Timmy and Chloe's parents spat out their water, then Mr. Turner let out a girly scream and fainted. Vicky, who was watching the report from the Dimmsdale jail, also spat out her water. Even the monster, who was drinking from the water tower, spat out its gulp and vanished after hearing the truth. "We had to let him go. Don't you people see? Chompy was miserable in that pen. He deserves to be happy and free!" She slammed her fist on the podium. The crowd cheered for his speech to hide their anger. "Thanks everyone. So I guess this means we're not in trouble?" asked Timmy, climbing back up to the podium. "Of course you are. Get them!" ordered the mayor.
The twins screamed in fright and ran away. Chompy, who was watching the thing unfold on a television in the field with his family, knew they had to do something. The owed the twins their gratitude for making them a family. The four goats ran off to save the twins from the angry mob chasing them. "A dead end!" said Timmy, as he and Chloe ran towards the end of an alley. "We're doomed!" Cosmo and Wanda appeared next to them as metal trash cans. "Well, you two lived good lives, right?" said Cosmo, trying to look on the bright side. "Cosmo, you're not helping!" cried Chloe, as sweat ran down her face. The angry mob closed in on the twins, but eventually stopped when they saw Chompy burst through the side wall to protect his saviors. His wife, son and daughter burst through the other side, which surprised the entire mob, making them forgive the twins for what had happened. Later that night, the two kids were disappointed to find out that they were grounded for lying to the entire town. "But our lie made everything better. I know it was wrong, but doesn't that count for anything?" asked Timmy, sitting up in bed. Mr. Turner let out a girly scream and fainted upon hearing his own son say that. Chloe slapped her hand on her face in embarrassment. "Does that answer your question, beaver boy?" she said, sternly. "Now, Chloe, be nice to your brother," said Mrs. Turner, kissing her kids goodnight. "Yes, mom," said Chloe, apologizing. "Goodnight, kids-we-still-love-even-though-they're-two-grounded-goatnappers," said Mrs. Turner, dragging her husband out of the bedroom with her. "Great. Grounded for five months. Life is so unfair!" said Chloe in annoyance. She then noticed that Timmy had fallen asleep in bed. She let out a yawn and fell asleep in her own bed. Even though they were grounded, the twins knew that everything was finally back to normal.
THE END
For now…