Disclaimer: I do not own The Fairly OddParents. This is a fan-made reboot of the original animated series. The Fairly OddParents belong to Nickelodeon and Butch Hartman.
The Fairly OddChildren
Chapter 14 – Chip Skylark
It was a lovely March morning in Dimmsdale, California. Timmy and Chloe were excited, because it was the month of their birthday. As excited as the twins were when they woke up, they soon discovered that later that same night, there would be a concert starring teenage singing sensation, Chip Skylark, who would perform his new song, My Shiny Teeth and Me. The song played over the radio, which Cosmo and Wanda danced to.
"Chip Skylark?" Timmy groaned. "That lame, pretty boy dork singer? He stinks!"
"No, he doesn't!" Chloe shouted angrily. "I mean, just look at him. That face, that hair, those teeth. And his voice is so dreamy."
"Wake up, sis! Today's our birthday, remember?"
"I wish Chip Skylark was around when I had a band! We would've rocked out loud!" said Cosmo excitedly. "Did you know I used to play the electric triangle?" He changed into a 1980's rock band outfit with a triangle plugged into a wall socket.
"But your band stunk!" laughed Wanda.
"Isn't there something special you want to say to us?" asked Timmy.
He pushed a birthday cake towards them and both he and Chloe popped out of it, making themselves appear special.
"Yeah. Pipe down so I can jam to this awesome Chip song," said Cosmo.
He then tried playing his instrument, but ended up shocking himself with electricity.
"Thank you, karma."
The twins walked away from their fairies, thankful that the escapade was over. Later that evening, the twins were excited for their birthday dinner. Chloe put out a sign that said Birthday Kids and the two of them put on birthday party hats.
"Cookies for dinner?" asked Chloe as Timmy realized that they had their phone number on them.
"Your mom and I are going to throw these to Chip while he's on stage!" said Mr. Turner in an I LOVE CHIP outfit with his wife.
"And maybe he'll call us and offer to be your big brother!" said Mrs. Turner.
"You guys are going to the concert? Tonight of all nights?" snapped Timmy. "What's so special about Chip Skylark?"
"Open your eyes, kiddos, that teen's delicious," giggled Mr. Turner.
The twins slowly followed their parents and frowned in disappointment.
"To think that our own parents forgot our birthday," sighed Chloe, holding the sign.
Just then, their dad stated that they had a surprise for them, causing her to drop the sign, breaking it. The twins dashed into the living room, hoping for something good. Mr. Turner opened the front door and revealed that Vicky was over to babysit while they were at the Chip Skylark concert.
"Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Turner," Vicky said nonchalantly as she walked into the house. "Hello kids who aren't Chip Skylark."
"She's being paid quadruple to babysit so we can go to the Chip Skylark concert tonight," Mrs. Turner explained as her husband presented Vicky a chest filled with diamonds, gold and everyday money.
"And we also managed to get the streaming service that the concert will be broadcast on, Dimmsflix," Mr. Turner added as Vicky looked at one of the diamonds in delight.
"Have a fun Chip-filled night!"
He and his wife then danced out the front door, excited for the concert. Vicky turned on the television to tune in to the Chip Skylark concert, which was being broadcast by Dimmsdale's short news anchor, Chet Ubetcha on the streaming channel, Dimmsflix.
"Move it, twerps!" said Vicky, pulling them away from the TV with a cane. "It's a streaming service, which means somebody's going to end up in one if I can't see this stinking concert!" She tossed the cane between the lamp and bookcase, which were in front of a giant Chip Skylark picture.
Cosmo and Wanda appeared and Wanda asked if the kids were alright.
"Everybody forgot about our birthday because of Chip stinking Skylark!" snapped Timmy.
"Hey, it's not his fault he turned out so delicious," said Cosmo. Chloe slapped her hand on her face, calling Cosmo an idiot as she and Timmy hopped down from the cane, ripping the backs of their shirts.
"I wish something bad would happen to Chip Skylark!" growled Chloe, angry that everyone had forgotten the twins' birthday.
The fairy rule book appeared, in order to make sure they didn't go overboard with their wish.
"Ok, but you just can't wish him maimed," said Wanda, looking at the rules.
"Ok, then I wish…" started Timmy, before Cosmo interrupted him turning the page.
"Or injured," said the green-haired fairy.
"Then…" started Chloe, until Wanda stopped her.
"Or beaten," she said.
Timmy was about to start talking when Wanda exclaimed that he also couldn't wish that Chip Skylark was dead.
"Fine then! I wish the worst possible non-lethal thing would happen to Chip Skylark right now!" screamed Chloe in a fit of rage.
The fairies granted her wish and the doorbell immediately rang.
"Who in their right mind would think of interrupting me when I'm about to watch teen singing sensation…" ranted Vicky until she opened the door to find Chip Skylark on the front porch. She squealed with delight upon seeing her dreamy idol.
"Hi," he greeted while posing. "I was just in a non-lethal accident in my record company's car. All of a sudden, I hit this tree which seemed to pop out of nowhere."
He then asked Vicky if he could use the phone in order to get a ride to his concert.
"Sure. Use my special phone."
Chip danced his way inside as he grabbed her phone. He pushed a button and sleep gas sprayed in his face.
"Tuesday is Applesauce Day," he said sleepily before passing out on the floor.
"Even unconscious, he's delicious. Mmm-mmm-mmm…"
"Ha! The worst possible thing that could happen to Chip is that he's stuck here with Vicky like us!" said Timmy from behind the recliner.
They quickly hid back behind it as Vicky dragged a now chained-up Chip to the twins' bedroom. The kids hi-fived each other in victory.
"Nice going, sis."
"Think nothing of it," remarked Chloe smugly.
Upstairs in the twins' bedroom, Vicky was asking Chip which of her dresses made her look like his future wife.
"I really don't think it matters," he answered honestly. "I think you'll make a great Mrs. Skylark, Mrs. Skylark."
Vicky squealed so happily, that she tore the purple dress she was holding up.
"I love you, Chip Skylark! I'm going to call all my friends and invite them to the wedding! First, I've got to find some friends," she said excitedly.
She ran out of the bedroom as Chip laid on Timmy's bunk lamenting on how he was being held against his will again. Just then, Timmy and Chloe got on top of the singing teen and asked if he was having a cruddy day like they were.
"The only cruddy day I ever have is a day when I disappoint my fans," he said in a kind and caring voice. He suddenly realized by their tone that they weren't happy at him. "I didn't disappoint you two, did I?"
"Because of you, your fame and your stupid concert, everybody forgot today was our birthday!" snapped Timmy.
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, kids. Reach into my coat pockets. I've got some things that might make it up to the both of you."
Timmy and Chloe leaped down from the bed and reached into the coat pockets. True to his word, the twins were excited to see what was inside. A pair of Crash Nebula and Ani action figures. Timmy pressed the button on his figure, which generated an automated voice line. The button on Chloe's figure was on the toy's belt.
"Eat laser, alien scum!" the Ani figure exclaimed.
"Happy birthday, Timmy and Chloe."
"These haven't even been released yet!" Timmy exclaimed. "How'd you get it?"
"I got the Crash Nebula figure as a gift from the record company. My cousin sent me the Ani figure," Chip explained. "Today's my birthday, too."
Chloe nervously glanced at her brother. Hearing this made them feel like total jerks. As if to say what they were thinking, Timmy pressed the button on his figure.
"What a jerk," the Crash Nebula toy said.
"But they scheduled my concert on my birthday, so I haven't even had a chance to celebrate it," Chip sighed. "Sometimes it's hard to be famous… and talented…"
"And delicious!" Chloe chimed in.
"Chloe!" snapped Timmy.
"What? That's what dad said, remember?"
The three of them laughed, thinking Mr. Turner's comment was downright hilarious. Just then, Chip coughed due to the chains around him being extremely tight.
"Sorry, Chip," said Timmy.
"That's alright, little pal. It's not like you wished for this to happen," Chip said ironically.
Cosmo and Wanda poofed into their fish bowl as their two Godparents walked up to them.
"Wow. I thought Chip would be a big jerk because he's a big star!" said Timmy, regretting the wish he had his twin sister make. "But he's not such a bad guy, after all."
"So, what are you going to do about it, then?" asked Chloe, putting down her Ani action figure's box.
"The one thing I know how to do! I wish Chip was free and out of Vicky's clutches!"
Cosmo and Wanda held up their wands to grant the wish. Unfortunately, the wands made a raspberry noise and fell over like a garden hose.
"Oh, great! The wand-not-working PBBLHT! Noise!"
"Oh, not again!" groaned Chloe as she facepalmed. "What happened this time?"
"Well, you know how the rules say we can't use our magic to destroy true love?" said Wanda as she made the fairy rulebook appear.
"So?" said Timmy.
Just then, Vicky burst into the room wearing a beautiful pink dress. As it turns out, she was the one feeling true love, hence why Chip couldn't be out of her clutches. She pushed a television towards him to watch while she went off to find someone to officiate their wedding.
"To the internet!" she exclaimed, slamming the door.
"That was both creepy and unsettling at the same time," cringed Chloe.
On the television, Chet Ubetcha was reporting amidst all the chaos, even getting himself beaten up in the process.
"It's a scene of mass chaos here at the Dimmsdale Dimmadome where everyone is angrily asking the same question – Where is Chip Skylark?" he reported.
"If Chip doesn't show up, I'm going to punish our children for no reason!" growled Mrs. Turner.
"Timmy, Chloe, if you're watching this… RUN!" said Mr. Turner just before Timmy turned off the television.
"We are so dead. We are SO DEAD!" Chloe screamed.
"Oh, no! Fans! Hundreds of them!" Chip panicked. "Disappointed! My fault! Guilt… growing! Teeth are becoming less shiny." And just like that, his teeth did indeed become less shiny. "Hair… losing sheen." His hair lost instantly lost its colorization and Chip looked like a complete and total wreck. So much so, that Chloe covered her eyes and screamed at the sight of her idol looking like this.
"Oh, man! Chloe, we've got to get Chip to the concert before all of those women… and our dad… tear the town apart!" Timmy exclaimed. "Wanda, you, Chloe and I have to get Chip out of here! Cosmo, you've got to get to the concert and stall by any means necessary!"
"Cool! I'm going to get my old band back together!" exclaimed Cosmo, pulling out his electric triangle. He then poofed away to the Dimmsdale Dimmadome, the stadium where Chip was supposed to perform at before Timmy and Chloe made their wish.
At the stadium, there were bunch of angry fans demanding the whereabouts of Chip Skylark immediately.
"WE WANT CHIP!" the women screamed.
"OR ELSE!" said Mr. Turner.
"WE WANT CHIP!"
"OR ELSE!"
"WE WANT CHIP!"
"OR ELSE!"
All of a sudden, Cosmo appeared behind the microphone on stage and made an announcement.
"Hello, Dimmsdale!" he exclaimed. "Are you ready for Chip Skylark?"
The crowd cheered upon hearing that statement, since it was him that they were waiting for.
"Well, he's not here, yet."
Upon hearing that, Cosmo immediately got splattered in the face by a tomato by one of the people in the audience. He then continued his speech and introduced his old band, The Fairies. There was Pan, a half-human, half-goat creature playing the pan flute, the holiday figure Santa Claus on the drums, the historical composer, Ludwig von Beethoven on the organ, and Cosmo himself on the electric triangle. The crowd did not appreciate the fact that Chip Skylark still wasn't there and hurled a bunch of tomatoes at Cosmo and his band. While his band wasn't happy at him, Cosmo gave them a nervous smile for at least trying.
Back at the Turner residence, Chip, still in padlock and chains, hopped out of the bathroom feeling relieved after having flushed the toilet.
"Feel better?" asked Timmy.
"Yeah, I didn't have to go to the bathroom, but the sound of flushing calms me down," said Chip. Since he was feeling a bit better, both his teeth and hair had since regained their shine and sheen.
"We're really sorry you have to spend your birthday with Vicky," said Chloe, feeling guilty.
"Oh, that's okay, kids. You have to spend nearly every day with her. I'm just here 'til she snaps or the SWAT team arrives."
"That's Vicky for you. Icky with a V," said Timmy as he started walking back towards the bedroom.
"You got that right, bro," Chloe chuckled.
Hearing those two words instantly sparked an idea for Chip. An idea for him to write a song about. A song called Icky Vicky.
"We were totally wrong about you, Chip," said Timmy. "Just because you're rich and famous, doesn't mean you're a jerk."
"Actually, I'm not all that rich," said Chip. "The record company pays for everything. I'm broke. But if the fans knew that, they might not love me anymore."
As Chip was speaking, Chloe thought of something that made her grin slyly.
"But neither would Vicky."
"Well, there's that."
Chip then spun back into the twins' bedroom as Chloe chuckled sinisterly.
"What's so funny?"
"Don't you see, Timmy? It's perfect," she said. We just have to let someone let Vicky know that Chip isn't rich. Then she won't love him and we can get Chip to the concert tonight."
As soon as Chip hopped back towards the twins' beds, he heard Vicky's voice behind him. She was in a beautiful pink dress with a pink bow in her hair.
"Look who I found on the internet," Vicky said lovingly.
She then dragged a nerdy-looking teenager with glasses into the room in order to start the wedding ceremony.
"When Vicky finds out that Chip's not rich, she won't love him anymore!" said Wanda.
"Exactly, Wanda. The only question is, though, how are we going to let her know?" said Chloe.
Wanda poofed herself away, having instantly thought of a brilliant idea as the twins looked on at Vicky's wedding ceremony.
"We are gathered here today to forcibly bond these two teens against their will," said the kid, holding a sermon book. "Is there anyone here besides the groom who has a reason these two should not be wed."
Just then, Wanda burst into the room with a tall, blonde man wearing a black suit over his red shirt, black pants, black shoes, and sunglasses.
"He does!" said Wanda.
"Oh, my gosh! It's the guy from the record company!" Chip exclaimed in shock.
"Thanks for the tip, pink-haired mystery woman," said the guy from the record company. He then walked up to Vicky with his silver-colored briefcase. "I represent Chip's record company. Since you're going to be Chip Skylark's wife, you get Chip Skylark's debts."
He opened his briefcase and revealed a bunch of bills inside of it and started handing them to Vicky.
"This is for the car, this is his cell bill, this is for the pager, and this is for uh, well, everything else."
He then dumped the bills on top of Vicky, causing her to gasp in confusion.
"Six million bucks?!" she gasped. "But Chip, I thought you were rich!"
"Nope he's just pretty and talented," said Timmy.
This made Vicky furious that the person she used to idolize is actually broke.
"You broke loser creep! I don't love you! This wedding is OFF!"
The twins and Wanda changed happy glances at each other, since they were glad that the plan worked.
"NERD!"
And with that, Vicky slammed the door to the twins' bedroom and stormed downstairs to watch television. Wanda raised her wand and used it to unlock the padlock holding the chains around Chip's body. Doing so finally freed him from Vicky's clutches for good. Chip was so happy that he decided to dance. After doing so, however, he noticed that it was 10:00 and started to worry that he would never get to his concert in time. Timmy then offered him Vicky's phone, which of course, knocked him out once again.
"I wish we were at the concert!" exclaimed Chloe.
Wanda raised her wand and poofed everyone away to the Chip Skylark concert at the Dimmsdale Dimmadome.
Meanwhile, at said place, people were booing Cosmo's band and pelting them with tomatoes, since they weren't Chip Skylark. It got so bad that even Trixie, the girl that Timmy had a crush on, was starting to lose her temper.
"If that dweeb doesn't show up in five minutes, I'm going to get really angry!" she barked.
Just then, as if by luck, Timmy and Chloe both came up onto the stage from underneath.
"Ladies… and Timmy and Chloe Turner's dad…" Timmy began as he yelled into the microphone.
"Hey, that's me!" said Mr. Turner.
"Timmy?!" gasped Trixie. She did not expect the boy she had known since kindergarten to pop up out of nowhere and speak into the microphone.
"ARE YOU READY TO ROCK?!" Chloe shouted as she took the microphone from Timmy.
Everyone in the audience cheered, ready to hear what they came for: Chip Skylark.
"Then put your hands together for… CHIP SKYLARK!"
The curtain rose and Chip Skylark was right there in front of the microphone with the crowd cheering that he was finally there.
"Dudes, how'd we get here so fast?" asked Chip as he woke up.
"Uh… the power of music?" Timmy lied.
"Rock on!"
He then shouted at Cosmo's band to start playing the song that he had just finished writing: Icky Vicky. After the introduction, Chip starting singing about how kids that Vicky had to babysit thought that she was icky.
Back at the Turner residence, Vicky was watching the concert on tv and suffice to say, she was getting extremely angry that Chip was singing a song that was about her negative personality. Despite the fact that she was getting more and more frustrated as the song went on, the fans at the concert didn't seem to care. They just wanted to see Chip perform. At the instrumental break, both Timmy and Chloe faced their parents while still on the stage.
"Don't worry about forgetting that our birthday was today, mom and dad. It's okay," said Timmy.
"What? Forgot your birthday?" gasped Mr. Turner.
"We'd never forget your birthday, kids," added Mrs. Turner.
"Your birthdays aren't until tomorrow."
"What?" Chloe asked in confusion.
"Happy almost birthday, Timmy and Chloe," their parents said as they continued dancing.
Chloe's left eye twitched as she realized what had just happened.
"How could we be so stupid? HOW DID WE FORGET TO CHECK THE CALENDAR THIS MORNING?!"
As she was freaking out, Chip managed to swipe the two of them back to the center of the stage as the song was about to come to an end. After the song was over and the crowd cheered, Trixie let out an extremely excited scream after seeing a stellar performance. She then ran up out of her seat on to the stage to greet Timmy. Her sudden appearance caught him off guard, but left him smitten, nonetheless.
"That was very bold of you," she cooed. She then leaned down towards his face and gave him a kiss on the cheek.
This immediately caused him to faint out of affection. Chloe caught him just before he hit the stage, due to passing out.
"You really have a way with boys, Trixie," Chloe said smugly.
"Don't I know," Trixie chuckled.
Back at the Turner residence, Vicky did not share the same affection that Chip's fans were showing him at the concert.
"I hate music," she grumbled.
THE END
For now…