RESUSCITATION

"Gah! The agony!" Kaminari moaned as he cradled an arm that bent in one too many places. "Why do broken bones hurt so much?"

"You appear to be dying of Stage Five leukemia," Izuku said. "Beginning amputation."

"I'm fine!" Kaminari shouted as the sawblades came out. "Just a bruise, barely nothing."

"Then perhaps a smaller surgical procedure is in order?" The giant blades were replaced with a smaller one.

"Oh look, there's Recovery Girl!" Kaminari sprinted ahead, despite every step jostling the bone fragments in his arm. He flung the door to Recovery Girl's office open and shouted, "Please heal me, I'm begging you! He wants to amputate my-"

Kaminari cut off with a croak when he saw Recovery Girl. She lay face-down on the ground, one arm outstretched towards an empty jar.

"Is she dead?" Kaminari poked her with his foot. She didn't budge. "Oh my god, she's dead." After a beat, Kaminari screamed, "I'm screwed!"

"Oh dear," Nezu said from behind him.

Kaminari gave a squeak and bolted for cover. "It wasn't me, I swear!"

Nezu held up the empty jar. "Looks like she ran out again. Izuku, do me a favor and get Recovery Girl's emergency kit, would you?"

Izuku punched through the glass and took out a small ziploc bag with a single black gummy bear inside. The moment Nezu popped it open, a shiver ran down Kaminari's spine. His hair rose, and sparks ran up and down his body.

"Whoa, what is that?"

"Very dangerous," Nezu said. "Just one of these is strong enough to kill twenty elephants."

"Really?"

"Yep! When we tested these, the one we fed it to exploded, and the other nineteen next to it died of shock." Nezu wrenched open Recovery Girl's jaw and shoved the gummy inside.

The elderly woman's eyes snapped open. Her chest thumped and writhed as her heart bounced around her ribcage like a pinball. She arched over backwards until her head touched her feet, twisted and twitched in a violent and uncontrollable spasm.

Recovery Girl went slack. She blinked her eyes, stretched, making loud popping noises with her spine, and yawned. Looking around, Recovery Girl sleepily said, "Dear me, did I fall asleep on the floor again?" Her eyes fell on Kaminari's mangled arm. "Here, let me fix that straight away."

Recovery Girl kissed his forearm. As the bones wriggled back in place, Kaminari howled in pain. "Get the saws Izuku! Get the saws!"

"Now where did I put my…" As Recovery Girl looked around, Nezu handed her the jar, now refilled with a rainbow of gummies. "Right, here we go." She popped a gummy in Kaminari's mouth, and the screaming faded away as he chewed. Kaminari laughed giddily as Izuku escorted him out of the room.

Once they were gone, Nezu said, "Remember to let me know next time you're running low, alright?"

Recovery Girl absently popped a few gummies in her mouth and nodded.

490

One Gummy to rule them all, one Gummy to find them, one Gummy to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.