Artoria hummed as she stuffed her face, sitting here at my breakfast bar cheeks puffed, dressed in flannel-styled PJ's. She almost seemed domestic, a far cry from the powerful agent that she was.
Be cautious of the old hand in a field where folk die young.
Artoria wasn't old not really, but her vocation with the church mirrored my own with Hellsing, someone with endless potential indoctrinated to fight a shadow war at a young age. Trained and forged in blood.
If Anderson was the poor foil to Alucard, Artoria was mine.
I'm fairly sure there are plenty of dead supernatural beings that cursed me before they were sliced into ribbons, for I never held back against the blonde, no that was false I held back plenty just enough so I didn't burn down the town wherever we were when we fought, but I fought intending to kill.
Yet she survived, and not only survived but thrived. I thought for a second perhaps she was a Saiyan, because why the fuck not, let's add in planet-destroying beings to this cursed universe, but thankfully it wasn't that bullshit shonen ability that let her get stronger from a fight, but it was something magical than alien.
Excalibur Ruler grants its wielder the power to manipulate any living thing or organic material. It's complete and utter horse shit.
Rapidly, increased my speed enough so that I could create afterimages, yeah alright in my hands it was deadly.
The Clarent Blade, a holy blade that was cursed beyond belief, so much so that it imbued the wielder magic with blood magic. It seemed simple on paper, yet the bloodied history of the blade was nothing to scoff at. The harm it caused the wielder was then dulled out to the user's foe twice more. It's almost sentient.
Nonetheless, Ruler was completely broken. So much so it made nearly all other weapons in comparison dull and useless.
Thankfully it was in the possession of my blonde rival. Someone who abhorred pointless killing, sure she did her job, and she did it well, but the destruction she could wreak was minimal to the potential she could actually achieve.
She just used the blade to heal herself and improve her vitality and endurance, the ability to change the matter around her, and she used it as a zenki boost, I don't feed into stereotypes usually, but she really is a blonde.
"Why do I feel like you just insulted me?"
"It's because you're a typical blonde." Taking a long sip of tea I held her stare as her eye twitched in annoyance.
"You were created to test my resolve." She mumbled as she stuffed her face once again.
I shrugged my shoulders, "Well I am a devil," She let out a huff at that but made no further comment, "maybe I'll get you to indulge in your wrath," I gave her a cleaned plate that she was filling up a second time, "or gluttony."
"The sins?" She asked to confirm the thing that was clearly on topic, odd but she liked to fill silences, so I was used to it from her, "It's about over-indulgence of our basic necessities and emotions when we have already filled our needs." She cleaned her mouth with a paper towel, "Well that's always how I've perceived the 7 sins."
Once again I shrugged, I didn't really care, I had my vices so I couldn't judge someone for over-indulging, plus it wasn't really indulgence in Artoria's case, the lady was human, superhuman, but human nonetheless, and she burned a shit tone of calories like it was nothing.
"You hear that dad? Over-indulgence." Rachel said with a pointed look as she sat across from the older blonde, the young healer next to her chuckled good-naturedly, I'm not sure why, neither girl spoke the same language, though the young nun seemed to like the chill vibe of my home nonetheless.
"I'm a devil, Lil'Raven. Sins don't apply to me," Lust, lust, lust… and maybe a little sloth.
"Half," Artoria corrected.
Not able to stop myself, I booped Artoria on the nose with a light tap, "Don't let the church hear you say that." It was easy to villainise a being if they weren't human, to label them monster, devil, demon, creature.
It's probably why Artoria struggled to put me down, despite having an impressive kill count, she saw me as a human, while her mentor saw me as the spit of Astrid.
"Perhaps if they saw you as I do…" Artoria scowled as I gave her a flat look, I really couldn't be asked to have this rehashed conversation we've had plenty of times already.
She wanted me to have a working relationship with the church for whatever fucking reason, but it just wouldn't work, not because of my half-breed status, nor long vetted history with Hellsing, they were factors against me working alongside them for sure, but it would never work for one main reason, I'd kill Griselda.
I'm not bloodthirsty, but I'll split the nun in two the moment she tried to ice me.
Do no harm, take no shit.
I didn't hate the broad but that doesn't mean I was going to take any BS from her. Even if I knew the fallout of such actions… Fuck I need to get a will sorted, everything goes to Rachel of course, but she'll need to go to someone who I could trust… Maze, maybe. Jo, weird thing to ask of my ex. Tegra is a hell no, Rachel ain't going to be an agent of Hellsing. Why do I have no guy friends? Ruval isn't a bad shout, nor is Aunt Leyla or her husband.
"Are you even listening to me?"
Staring up at the ceiling as I looked to be in deep thought was now completely intentional, "Nah, trying to figure out who Rachel will go to if I get killed."
"Excuse me?"
I shooed the girl off, "You're excused."
"Hate you Dad." She was completely used to me and my shenanigans.
Though I guess she may come to mean that if I trained her.
"You got any hunting missions on this side of the pond?" I asked Artoria all of a sudden and the blonde looked shocked for a moment, but then a joyous smile overtook her face. Do not fuck the nun, do not fuck the nun.
The likes of 'Tegra or Hela, I could have a tryst with them and if things went south, I wouldn't have ruined their lives.
The likes of Abbadon or Rose, fuck me do I make bad choices, I don't know which one is worse, the immoral arch-duchess demon, or my half-sister.
Jo is, was the better of my choices, an honest relationship that ended because of human reasons.
And Maze was a kindred spirit, though she didn't do relationships so there wasn't really a future there with the mostly-neutral demon, just straight going to town on each other's gentiles.
Artoria was great, but with my track record, I'd fuck it up and the church would view her as 'spoiled', hells the fuckers were going to give chirpy little Asia the boot because she was tricked into healing what's'his'face.
Artoria's humming pulled me out of my thoughts as she pulled out a tablet from her satchel. She swiped the screen before placing it on the bar between us, her eyes then flickered to the girls.
"I heard rumours of families going on road trips and then disappearing."
Picking up a fork, I used the very little alchemy I understood and transmuted the steel into a pair of wedding bands, before flicking the smaller one to Artoria who deftly caught it and slipped it on.
"My money is on vampires."
"I do not bet, but I would guess considering it's a rural area that it would involve scarecrows."
"Clowns." Our eyes turned to Rachel as she scrunched her face up, "I don't know I just have a feeling that I'm going to run into a killer clown or something."
"Stay away from Gotham," I warned easily enough, I was neutral on most things beyond my personal life, but if I ran into the Clown Prince of Crime, I'd fucking tear him apart limb from limb, burn his remains to ashes, and then seal the remains and dash it into a fiery pit in hell, just to safe from comic antics. Thus, I'd earn Batman's ire.
He was my previous life's childhood hero, but I'd still fuck him up, no questions asked if he thought he could preach his code to me.
I'm an immortal half-devil and a former child soldier turned commander. Morality was a thing far beyond my ken. The blood of a miscreant like the Joker wouldn't tip the scales of my moral compass any more than the countless others I've killed.
Even still I had enough with the troubles that found me, or appeared on my doorstep, I didn't need to go looking for trouble.
Unknown's POV
There was something wrong with them.
It began as it usually started, a family vehicle was forced to a stop as its wheels were punctured with the hidden spikes on the road.
The towns folk did their jobs of forcing the family to stay, as their vehicle was being repaired or, so they were told, she did not know what the herd did with their provisions items when she was done with the families and she cared not beyond that it didn't hinder her future feedings.
But perhaps she should get the herd to dig a little on them.
An odd couple, with two girls. The man looked too young to be the father, and he bore no resemblance to girls. One mute apparently, yet the blonde child who resembled her mother wore bright clothes, which contrasted with her sister who wore muted clothes.
The woman was a beauty loath as she was to admit it, perhaps her herd would get a chance to rape her, marring her beauty while they were at it.
The man… something sinister plagued his soul, she couldn't figure what it was… perhaps it was the reason there were faint traces of the taint on the muted-clothed girl, perhaps the man was despoiling the girl behind her mother's back, or she knew and didn't care.
The herd called her names when they believed she wasn't listening, akin to a monster or vile creature, and yet she has feasted on a number of sickening families, the world would not miss them, nor would they miss this one.
She awaited them in her ritual circle, the herd would bring them in, grabbing them when they slumbered, and she would feast.
Though she was baffled, for she heard a gunshot, her herd knew to play this quiet, so for a fleeting moment she believed that perhaps the husband had attacked her herd, yet she was proven wrong, yet bullet rattled past her.
She was the target, of a gun, what would putrid iron or steel do to the likes of her, she was a goddess, the gall-
Rowan's POV
Letting out a wince, not at the fact the leshen crumpled on the ground as the blessed incendiary rounds dug into her gut.
No, I was wincing at the sheer misses.
Rachel wasn't a good shot, giving her my pistol from when I first started off as a soldier of Hellsing, I had given her an impromptu lesson, the classic cliché of shooting cans, I wasn't willing to use bottles, because what those scenes never show, was who the fuck cleans up the shards of glass.
She wasn't a crack shot, and then again, I wasn't when I had first gotten my piece, but even still she could hit the stationary targets back home.
It was the killing, no, monster hunting, it's what I'll call it to ease her into this world, even still she'd have to harden her heart in moments like these.
Artoria and I dealt with the cult that followed the lashen. A wendigo-like creature, though instead of cannibalism being the cause of change, it was something more… mundane, heartbreak, jealousy, envy, yada, yada, yada. Honestly, the fey creature that turned this once human into a leshen is more of a nuisance than them.
They had a slight control over nature, and minor psychic aptitude, hence why they could gather a shit load of farmer cults.
"Rowan," Artoria spoke as she stood beside Asia, "perhaps you or I should-"
"No," I cut her off, succeeding in keeping my voice firm, "Rachel," The girl looked up at me, and was it bad that I wanted her to be a little shaken up by this? I was on the verge of tears when I first killed, though I had to slit the man's throat as he begged for his life, but Rachel held strong and gave me a nod, and she walked forward with the gun raised.
A shot to heart, followed by a shot to head, that's what Artoria taught her, though she did me proud as she doubled-tapped.
When she walked back, I noticed the swell of tender instincts wash over Artoria's form and she wanted to hug the girl, whilst simultaneously stabbing me. Fair. Self-hatred was my bread and butter, but right now was the worst I've ever felt that I sort of understood why Alucard wanted to just bite the bullet.
"So, no one wins right," Yep Ophis came and struck me down I wouldn't fight it right now, not with how nonchalant Rachel was acting.
"Asia wins," I stated, not helping as I took her up on her small talk, "she didn't bet, so she's the real winner." Rachel scrunched up her face and I cut off whatever thing she was thinking, "No this isn't a blonde soft spot thing, that I don't have by the by." Turning around I headed back to the main town, I'd prop it all up to look like a fucked ritual thing, no need for the girls to get their hands dirty with playing with corpses.
Artoria hummed as she walked beside me, "Rowan doesn't have a soft spot for blondes," I would thank her but I had a feeling I knew where she was going, "its redheads, that have a strong sway to his base urges."
Rolling my eyes, I knew better than to deny it, but it also sadly reminded me of something she'd want to know, though it would lead to prodding on her part, I wasn't someone who could be shamed easily but even still Artoria's non-judgemental, judgement rankled me somewhat.
"Abaddon."
"What about that demon?" She busted out in conversational Spanish, so neither half-demon nor young nun could pick up the topic of a demon of Abaddon's standing.
Following suit, I spoke in Spanish also, "I know where she is." The non-judgement shed its veneer and was a full-blown disappointment.
"You slept with it, didn't you?"
"No," I denied, and she looked relieved for a moment, "I fucked her, no sleeping involved, do I look like a fool enough to slumber next to her?" I'm fairly sure I was asking to die here and now, with how much of a dick I was being.
Artoria's eye twitched and a look of murder graced her soulful blue eyes, her hand twitched, and I was sure she was going to call upon her Excalibur fragment and shank me, thankfully she held firm to our friendship, "Where is the beast? I'll rid you of that vile creature and perhaps then you'll make good choices."
A fat lot of that happening, I could maybe kill Abaddon but I'm fairly sure she took the form of red-headed MILF just because she knew I was a sucker for it. While the Winchester brothers weren't a thing in this universe, the elements of their world were here, well select cherry picks, but the point was if Rowena Macleod ever crossed my paths, well it'd be safe for all if I was put down. For the safety of humanity.
Handing over the trail of the demon, it was a good idea if I stayed out of whatever conflict the two would find themselves embroiled in.
Oh man, it's such an Alucard move, stirring some shit up and then letting the conflict ensue… ah well I'm acting as if Abaddon stands a chance. Plus hunting the supernatural was inline with the blonde's duties, the only reason why we tagged along here was Rachel to get her first blood.
My focus was on my daughter, for now, the less foxy demons distracting me with their magical lady bits the better… right?
A/N – Published 2024/08/09
Yo, thanks to the support shown to this story, always means a lot.
I'm trying to convey Rowan's fucked psyche and how he wants what's best for Rachel but he's not quite equipped for fatherhood. But at the same time, Rachel needs this because Trigon wants to possess her.
Plus, he can't see how Rachel came to him mentally scarred somewhat beyond the issues with her father. His blind eye to that is because of the fact his second childhood was a complete shitshow, and he just thinks most kids are just innocent right off the cuff. i.e. he dumb.