Door: kicked
Soldier: in
Tentacles: out

I forcibly remove Hydra from the premises.

As soon as I recognised the Hydra logo, my kagune burst out of my back. They slammed into the Hydra grunt. He went flying.

The window on my left was smashed in. Bullets punched me in the side. I sharpened my kagune and stabbed one into the ground to anchor myself. Another shot through the window and pierced the chest of the soldier there. I retracted it and he slumped over halfway inside and dropped his gun. I grabbed it.

"Fight," I ordered Bucky, tossing the gun to him.

He caught it and aimed through the cabin's other window. He held the trigger. The third Hydra goon staggered back with the force of the bullets. Bucky shifted his aim upwards the goon's face exploded in a mess of red.

A light clanking sound from behind alerted me and I turned just in time to see something black and cylindrical bounce to a rest at my feet before—

BANG!

I recoiled and clapped my hands against my ears. My eyes squeezed shut but it was too late; the light produced by the flash-bang had already rendered me half-blind.

Enhanced senses, why have you betrayed me?

Something tangled around my legs and I was treated to the familiar and unpleasant sensation of electrocution. I stiffened and wrestled with my disobedient muscles to stay upright. Gritting my teeth against the pain, I opened my eyes just in time to see a Hydra grunt shooting off a net. It crackled and sparked with electricity as it flew towards its target: me.

It hit.

I crashed to the ground, pinned by the heavy metal net.

Electric bolas and an electric net? Overkill, much?

While I tried to stay conscious through the shocking (ha) pain, Bucky leapt over me and charged the Hydra grunt frantically reloading the net gun. He forced the gun's aim upwards but failed to stop the trigger from being pulled. The net hit the ceiling, then fell.

Right on top of me.

"Oh, come on!" I tried to yell through the renewed electrocution. What kind of shit luck was this?! Maybe I should have ordered him to protect me as well as fight.

Too late for that though. By the time the charge on the nets and bolas ran out, the fight was over. I shoved the net off myself as soon as I realised I could move again. Bucky returned to the cabin to the sight of me stomping on those stupid fucking nets, cursing the inventors and the inventors' parents and the inventors' parents' parents.

"Oh good, you're back," I said, dragging the nets out of the cabin. I hurled them into the blizzard with a loud "Fuck you!" and they soared through the air, never to be seen again. I brushed my hands off with a satisfied 'hmph'.

The cabin was pretty much done for, with two broken windows and a busted door, but it was still better than the blizzard. It really sucked we had to leave it now.

Bucky had dragged a single body back in with us.

"So, what's up?" I asked him. He stared at me blankly and slowly looked upwards.

"The ceiling. The sky."

"No, uh, I mean what's going on? What's happening…" I gestured to the body, "here?"

"Five hostiles total eliminated. One prisoner taken. For interrogation. Currently unconscious."

Oh, so the body was alive. No wonder its arms had been put in heavy metal restraints. Those had probably been meant for the Winter Soldier.

I crouched down and examined its—his?—face. His balaclava had been pulled down to his neck and a line of bloody drool was leaking out the side of his mouth. I pried his mouth open and peered inside. Yep, there was a tooth missing.

"Suicide tooth?" I asked Bucky. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the bloody false tooth. I wrinkled my nose. "Gross. Throw that thing away."

After a moment's hesitation, he tossed it out the window. The one with a corpse still hanging over the sill. At least it was blocking the wind a little?

I gave the prisoner a little slap. Then another. And another. I slapped the entire chorus of 'Fat Lip' onto his face and still he didn't stir.

"Are you sure he's still alive?"

Bucky knelt and felt under the Hydra goon's nose, then his neck. He stood back up.

"Yes."

"Hm…" I stared at the man, willing him to wake up. He didn't. I sat back on my haunches.

"Welp, this is boring," I declared. "Call me when he wakes up. I'm gonna go… do whatever. Loot the bodies."

"Understood."

Windowsill Corpse had a great big hole in its chest so its jacket was a no go. I tried to take its pants and was met with a nasty brown surprise in its underwear. I shoved it back out the window, ass first. Its boots were probably fine, but I really didn't want to touch that particular corpse again.

The corpse beneath the other window—the one whose face was mush—was partially covered in snow. I brushed it off and checked the underwear first. Clean. I dragged it inside. The front of its jacket had been shredded by bullets, but the kevlar vest had saved the thermal layers underneath. I stripped the corpse and tried to suck out the blood soaking the jacket collar. It worked, partially.

I pushed the thermals and bulletproof vest into Bucky's arms and told him to change into them. While he obeyed, I shoved my freezing feet into the too-big socks and shoes and shrugged on the jacket. The corpse, I dragged back outside with me.

Hunched over to avoid dirtying myself any further, I cracked its skull open and a enjoyed a lukewarm serving of human brain. As a human, I'd once been served pig brain soup while visiting my grandparents in China. It'd been pretty good.

This tasted nothing like that. For one, it was raw, and I was eating it in the middle of a blizzard in a world that didn't know me, rather than inside a warm house surrounded by those who loved me.

…Still good though.

I popped the sole intact eyeball into my mouth and squinted through the blizzard. There were three snowmobiles, one on its side, and three more corpses, one of which I recognised as the one who'd kicked the door in. I trudged over to them. I looted one jacket, one pair of pants, and stole all their socks.

Bucky had changed by the time I got back to the cabin. The material strained across his chest in a way that made me want to fan myself. He'd ripped the left sleeve off the shirt.

Our prisoner was awake and angrily cursing through his gag. So that's where Bucky's ripped sleeve went. I dumped my loot onto the cot.

Interrogation time. Time to bring out my inner thespian.

"Hi~" I leered, crouching in front of our prisoner. I extended my kagune and stroked his cheek, baring my teeth in the creepiest smile I could make. He recoiled. There was fear in his eyes. It was making me feel some kinda way.

"I see you're awake. I just have a few~ questions I'd like you to answer. Just a few easy questions. Nod if you understand."

He didn't. I tilted my head.

"Is it a language problem?" I yanked the gag from his mouth and leaned in close. "DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME."

He spat at me. "Fuck you, freak."

I wiped my cheek. "That wasn't very nice."

Quick as a whip, my kagune encircled his throat. I raised him by the neck, standing as I did, until his feet were fully off the ground. He choked and struggled, kicking futilely and cursing me out with what little air he had. I waited until his eyes had rolled back into his skull before dropping him.

He fell on his side, coughing and gasping for air. I kicked him onto his back.

Placing one foot on his sternum, I leaned forward and rested my arm on my knee.

"Let's get started. How did you find us?"

"Wouldn't… you… like… to know?" he coughed out.

"Yeah, man, that's why I'm asking you. Are you stupid or something?"

"You're the stupid one, for stealing from Hydra and ever thinking you could get away! Hydra is—"

I stomped on his chest and he cut off with a wheeze. Something cracked beneath my foot.

"Oops. Sorry, I felt like you were about to go on a rant about the 'greatness of Hydra!' or something and I'm really not in the mood."

I ground my foot down. He made these little gasps of pain that were really making me feel some kinda way.

"C'mon, just tell me. Don't you wanna stop hurting? It's not like I'm asking for any big secrets, like the locations of all your super secret bases or something."

"You can't see it, but I'm flipping you off right now," he informed me, lifting his arms. The restraints covered him fully from the forearms down. "I aint telling you shit."

"Funny guy." I inspected the man. Hydra had no doubt trained their agents to resist all kinds of torture. Was there anything I could do that would make him crack…?

Oh, right.

I crouched and grabbed his arm. "Funny guy like you, must have an extra funny bone, right? I wonder how it tastes."

I chomped on his elbow. I chomped it several times, until it was all gone and his forearm and upper arm were completely separated.

"It doesn't taste—stop screaming—it doesn't taste all that different," I informed him. He continued to scream.

I rolled my eyes, licked clean my mouth, and waited for him to get over it.

"My arm! My fucking arm! You—fuck!—you fucking bit—you ate—what the fuck is wrong with you!" he screamed.

"Bruh, you're the one who called me a freak, but you don't even know what kind of freak I am?"

"They told us about the tentacles and bulletproof skin, they didn't tell us about the fucking cannibalism!"

"Okay, first of all, they aren't tentacles, they're my kagune tails, not that you'd know what kagune are, and second of all, it's not cannibalism since I'm not human." I frowned. "Scratch that. It might be half cannibalism. Three-quarters cannibalism? Not sure about that actually."

The prisoner had started hyperventilating, staring at his absent elbow. Shit, was he going to faint? I slapped him.

"Hey, before you pass out, answer my question and I promise I won't eat you anymore. Can't do anything about the arm, but hey, if you ask nicely, maybe Hydra'll give you a new one. How'd you guys find us?"

"Tracker…" he mumbled, "In the Asset's arm… my arm… it's gone…"

I threw my head back and groaned. "Maybe I am fucking stupid. Of course they put a damn tracker in his arm. How do we get it out? Oi. Oi oi oi."

I slapped him a few times, but he was out cold. And at the rate he was bleeding, he'd only ever get colder.

"I sure hope the arm he's talking about is the metal one," I told Bucky. "Because we're getting that tracker out no matter what, and I've never stitched anyone up in my life."

wow, you guys are still reading this? not that i'm ungrateful.

review?