"Mer, I was thinking that for Christmas, you could come back to Seattle with me & stay with my family. I'll be going home for the holidays and I don't like the thought of you being here alone." Derek asked.

Meredith stared at him silently as the thoughts ran through her head. Seattle? She was never going back to Seattle. She hated Seattle. Why did Derek have to be from there also? Also staying with his family? She'd have to meet his family and she hated meeting families, she wasn't a family girl, families hated Meredith Grey. Not to mention his truck load of sisters who she would probably never get along with, they would probably hate her and then Derek would dump her and she'd be all alone again. She couldn't meet his family.

"Mer?" His voice interrupted her thoughts.

"Umm, I'm not sure Derek. I don't think so, I'll be good here." She stuttered, eyes wide.

"Why not? My family wanna meet you, they've heard so much about you and they just... they'll love you mer."

"I don't do families. Families are messy."

"It'll be fine I promise. You'll have a good time there."

"No Derek. I don't want to." She sighed flipping through her book.

"Why not? You haven't even given me a reason." Derek asked frustrated.

"I don't need to give you a reason, I just don't want to."

"Well you're gonna have to eventually Meredith. Just grow up." Derek raised his voice as he threw his study book in his bag.

"Grow up?!" She turned to him, her eyes narrowed.

"Yeah, grow up. We've been dating for 5 months and you're still refusing to meet my family, I know you're nervous but seriously Meredith grow up."

"You have no idea what you're talking about so either shut up and leave it or get out of my apartment."

"Fine." He said packing his stuff and getting up.

"Fine. You know where the door is." She bit.

"I had no idea you were so immature, do me a favour and after I've gone just consider how I feel in this situation."

She rolled her eyes in response.

Derek watched her and scoffed before walking hastily out of her bedroom, slamming the apartment door with frustration. In the 5 months they'd be dating, this was their first argument and it was over something that was supposed to be a good thing, he knew that maybe she'd need a little convincing before agreeing to go home to Seattle with him but he didn't expect her to blow it out of proportion like she had and in this moment he was rethinking everything about their relationship.

Meredith on the other hand was upset that he actually left, he knew nothing and he thought he knew everything. She had never got round to telling him about her childhood, about the abuse she experienced, about the abandonment from her parents, he didn't understand and it hurt her that he was being so inconsiderate to her feelings. He hadn't stop to consider her all whilst implying she was selfish and immature. Tears fell down her cheeks as she rested her head on the desk and cried over her book. Deep down she knew that Derek had a good family, she'd heard all about them but that didn't change her experience, and she was afraid that she was the problem, like she'd been told all her life. She didn't want his family to hate her and then have to relive the pain all again.

A couple hours later, she was woken up by Cristina and Izzie.

"Meredith!" Cristina shook her shoulder.

What?" Meredith mumbled, she had fallen asleep on her desk.

"We've been shouting you. Why are your eyes like balloons?"

"Well clearly I was asleep Cristina." She snapped rolling her eyes before rubbing them.

"Jeez no need to be a bitch about it."

"Whatever. Why are you in my room?" She asked looking between both her friends.

"Uhh, we were going to the library to study remember?" Izzie smiled unsurely.

"Oh." Meredith nodded.

"So are you ready or shall we go without you?" Cristina asked tapping her foot.

"You know what, I actually need a drink. Wanna skip the library and go out instead?" Meredith stood up.

"How about we do that tomorrow? I really need to study." Izzie said.

"Me too." Cristina agreed.

"Oh. Well I'm just gonna stay here and study. I don't really want to go to the library." Meredith told them.

"Ok. Only if your sure."

"I am."

With that her friends left to go study at the library and Meredith decided that she would go out on her own for a drink. She knew it probably wasn't her best idea but she needed it, she was angry and upset and just needed a drink to relieve herself so she started getting ready. She dressed in a red ribbed tshirt with sleeves and a pair of blue jeans alongside her trusty converse.

"Tequila please." She ordered at the bar.

Once it was placed in front of her she shotted it back quickly, the taste didn't bother her anymore and she enjoyed the burn. One tequila shot after the other she was pretty drunk, she had sat at the bar all night but as the atmosphere was lightning up she started to dance. She would never cheat on Derek but it didn't mean that she didn't enjoy the attention she was receiving, she could have fun with guys and it not mean anything so was dancing with them. Her hips swinging to the music that was playing as she flipped her hair and stumbled back to the bar to order more shots.

"Can I get that?" A boy asked, his green eyes piercing into hers.

"Sure." She nodded.

"Wanna dance?" She asked him giggling.

"With you? Yeah." He smiled and she grabbed his hand as she went to the dance floor.

They danced for ages and she was having fun, unaware to her surroundings and unaware that she was suddenly dancing alone.

"Meredith, let's go." She felt hands on her shoulder.

"Get off. I wanna dance." She shrugged.

"No Meredith you've danced enough, and you've drank enough, we're going home." She turned to see Derek guiding her out.

"Get off of me." She pulled.

He ignored her and carried on holding her up as he walked her out. Once outside she turned to face him again, whacking her bag into his chest.

"What the hell are you doing!" She shouted.

"I'm taking you home. You're wasted. Do you have any idea how stupid that was, to go out drinking on your own? Are you really that stupid?" Derek asked her angrily.

He was concerned for her safety. He had gotten a phone call from his friend Weiss telling him that his girlfriend was totally wasted at a bar on her own so he immediately made his way there.

"I'm not stupid, you're stupid. You're so stupid and you're inconsiderate and you're selfish and I hate you." She slurred.

"Ok Mer." He rolled his eyes just agreeing with her to save an argument.

"No really you are. You are a selfish idiot. You don't even know anything about my life in Seattle before storming out that I don't want to go back." Her eyes were narrowing by the minutes and her frown deepening the more she looked at him.

"You're not even making sense."

"Just shut up Derek."

"No tell me. If I'm a selfish idiot tell me because from where I'm standing you're the selfish one Meredith. And you're also too selfish to see it." Derek spat nastily.

He knew he had angered her even more, she was shaking in front of him, the anger seeping out of her very visibly.

"Were you beat as a child? Or left alone for days with no food? Did you have no friends and no family? Did your parents forget about your birthday and tell you how unimportant it was? Because mine did, but hey I'm selfish and immature so I guess it's fine. Maybe they're right." She admitted.

He didn't say anything but his face softened. He was such an ass, she was right. Meredith watched the sympathy on his face and immediately regretted what she had told him.

"Change your face Derek I don't want your sympathy. I want you to leave me the hell alone." She said before jumping into a cab that had pulled up, she quickly closed the door before he could move and follow her.