The brothers met that evening where they had separated. As soon as Josh and Jason came into view, Jeremy came running up the street to them. The boy was disheveled and muddy.
"Hey!"
"Hey yourself. Have you been fighting?" They walked on to home.
"Not really. M-maybe a little b-bit."
"Mmm. May I ask why?"
"Of course. Charlie and David asked me if I was a g-girl. I showed 'em I w-wasn't."
"I wonder what they'll say come Sunday if you show up for pictures with your face all powdered and painted."
"Aw, Jason! Y-you wouldn't d-do that! Would you?"
"Let's not find out."
They entered their town home, and started on their separate chores. In no time they were warm and coffee was ready while supper was cooking. Jeremy got out his books to study.
"Were you visiting the Sisters?" Jason asked. "Looked like you were coming from that way."
"Uh-huh. M-ms, Am-melia, anyway. She s-says she's g-glad I'm b-back, so she has an excuse for to s-sit d-down."
"Does she need one?" Word around town was that both Amelia and Sarah were not doing well. Jason wondered if that was any part of Jeremy's wondering this morning.
"Well, yeah. She's old. They all are." Jeremy frowned at his history book. "J-jason, are they as old as this stuff?"
"That depends on what you're studying"
"Louisiana Purchase. Wh-why do I n-need to know that, J-jason? It was d-done. Why do I n-need to know more than that?"
"Hmm." Jason rubbed his forehead. "It never hurts to know all you can about a subject, Jeremy. You never know when it might come in useful. We may ship to New Orleans someday, once people start returning there from San Francisco and such. Our red woods might do well in that climate, and give a new look to old buildings."
"Ya think?" Josh interjected. Sometimes Jason really surprised him.
"It's not impossible."
"Well, c-can't I learn it then?"
"It's harder to learn new things when you're older. If you learn the basics now, that's that much less you have to learn when it's harder."
"It's the foundation," Josh said. "When you need more, you've already got a foundation to start from."
Jeremy nodded reluctantly. "But it's b-boring. And conf-fusing. French and Sp-panish and C-Creole and C-Cajuns and s-swamps and b-bayous and all k-kinds of-wars. Why d-do p-people have w-wars., anyway?"
"Because there are some things worth fighting for," Josh answered.
"Like what?"
"Land," Jason answered. "We fight pretty hard to keep control of our mountain, don't we?"
Jeremy thought that over. "Did we ever k-kill somebody?"
"I don't know. Maybe."
"Huh."Jeremy shut the book. "Y-you never t-told me. Is the W-wrd S-sisters as old as history? I know they c-come from MacBeth."
"They are probably about that age."
"Ms. Amelia s-said I was h-history. S-Seattle history."
"She did? Why?"
"Because we was t-talkin' ab-bout h-history." Jeremy's tone reflected puzzlement at the question.
"I think he means how," Josh said, moving the books to another place and refilling coffee cups, before setting dishes on the table.
"Oh." Jeremy thought that over, as his brothers came to the table and they began eating. "Sh-she s-said I w-was the f-first b-baby born here."
"Oh." Was that what he'd been wondering about this morning? Possible, but unlikely.
"B-but that ain't right, is it, J-Jason? Didn't the Indians have b-baies here? And the t-trappers? That's lots of babies, b-before we even knowed here was here."
"She meant the first settler baby, I suppose." Not a conversation Jason was ready for tonight.
"Well, she shoulda said that."
"I agree."
Josh was putting the coffee pot together, and asked Jason if he wanted more tonight, since they weren't going to be working in the morning.
Jason shook his head, and Jeremy smiled. He liked having his brothers handy, even if he'd rather not see them throughout the day.
"Want to work on your song?" Josh asked. "I remembered a bit more of the sailor song you were using."
Jeremy shook his head. "You sing."
Josh nodded, got his instrument, and got himself in the proper mood.
"That's one sad song," Jason commented.
"More sad than spooky," Josh agreed. "Even if everyone ends up dead."
"I g-guess sometimes, dying is g-good," Jeremy said, surprising both his brothers.
"It's natural," Josh said. "Not that nature's necessarily good."
"It just is," Jeremy agreed. He nodded to himself, as Jasona nd Josh again spoke in looks. "Jason?"
"Yes?"
"I w-was w-wondering. Wh-when Ms. Am-melia dies, who will talk to me ab-bout Mama?"
Jason sat up straighter and set aside the book he had picked up. "Jeremy, have we ever not talked about Mama with you when you wanted to? Either of us?"
"Yeah, what kind of question is that?"
"No." Jeremy answered Jason and ignored Joshua. "B-but –" he made a gesture, and looked at Josh, because Jason was looking hurt. "You can only t-talk ab-bout her as M-Mama, cause she was your M-mama, too. When Ms. Amelia t-talks, she's t-talking ab-bout a p-person, not a Mama."
"She was our mother, isn't that enough?" Josh demanded. "What else do you want?"
"What has Ms. Amelia been telling you?" Jason asked calmly, with a frowning headshake at the indignant Joshua.
"Lotsa stuff. She says you m-might l-look like Da, and have his presence, but temper - tem-per-ment-ly, you're more l-like her." Jeremy giggled his old way. "She says ev'ry t-time you c-come striding through t-town to take care of s-somebody or s-something, she sees Mama, w-with her sk-skirt g-gathered up in her hands as she'd t-take the same long steps, only shorter ones, because you're t-taller, w-with her ch-chin j-jutting out the s-same and her eyes on f-fire. Sh-she said it always m-makes her laugh." His face lit up as he was telling the story, his gestures expansive.
"Oh." Jason looked over at Josh, who was half-laughing now.
"I've been telling you that forever," Josh pointed out.
"Excuse me if I'm not sure you're the best judge of which parent I take after most. You might be a little biased."
"I'm a lot biased. We never had to be afraid of Mom, no matter how mad she was, and after she was gone, Da was just plain mean to us. When you were gone."
"Was it really that bad?" Jason had always thought the boys were reeling from not having Mom's calm voice reasoning with Da when he got enraged, and preventing some of his more severe punishments, Jason had always taken the brunt of those. They had all been hurting so badly. He'd been glad he could get away, which now appeared selfish of him.
Jeremy shivered.
"Sometimes," Josh said. "We took care of us the best we could, and when it got too – too loud, Mr. Mack would drop in, or Lottie, sometimes even the Sisters, but they made Da madder when they told him how ashamed and embarrassed Mom would be with his tantrums. Yes, that's what they said."
"Ye gods. But why didn't you tell me? I'd have figured out something."
"Sometimes, when I did tell you, when he sent you off again, I'd barely be able to sit again by the time you got back. Telling you only made things worse. At least for me."
"What about Jeremy? He was still practically a baby."
"He was five years old, Jason. According to Da, old enough to not be a baby. He wasn't as rough with Jeremy as he was with me – or even you, if I think about it, but he was rough enough."
"And no M-Mama to cry with," Jeremy added, and Jason pulled the boy into a hug. "I w-wanted M-mama. Or y-you. M-mama al'ays s-said y-you'd 'tect m-me, b-but you weren't there. And th-then you w-were again, and Da started to b-be D-da again, mos'ly. Right, Josh?"
Josh nodded. He was watching Jason.
"I remember coming home and the place was a mess. Nothing had been done, every dish and stitch of clothes piled up here and there. I told Da I thought he needed me more at home and that I wouldn't go out on any jobs until I knew he could take care of you properly. He punched me in the mouth and then started crying until the booze got to him and he blacked out."
"And sleeped and sleeped and sleeped, until you m-made it m-most l-like home ag-gain! W-we was so happy!" Jeremy threw his arms around Jason's neck.
"You should have been infuriated with me."
Josh stood beside Jason and put his hand on his brother's shoulder.
"If we had been, you might have gone away again."
Josh's blunt honesty had Jason bowing his head and covering his face.
Oh, lordy, how had he failed them so badly? And why had he never known?