Chapter 12

Peggy's feet pounded the frozen pavement. It was four in the morning, maybe? Winston was leashed beside her, trotting happily, oblivious. She fought against the rising nausea in favor of beating back the chest pain. It's fine, It's fine, everything's fine, I'm fine. Her eyes stung. It's just the cold air. Peggy slammed the brakes, ignoring her complaining calves as she heaved into a pile of dry leaves.

Some battles you don't win.

Winston whined beside her, nuzzling against her knees.

"I'm fine," she rasped, "I'm ok." Flu, just the flu, just the flu. She'd had the flu before, she knew what the flu was like. Underneath the bathroom sink at the apartment was an opened box of tampons, calling her a liar. But that could be attributed to stress. She was newly married, still relatively new to the future, Steve was back in Germany, Hydra was back, there was quite a lot to be stressed about. A great deal of upheaval going on in her life. So that was it, that was all. She needed to take the week off her feet, allow herself to rest, drink tea and chicken soup, and all would be well, right? Wrong. No change in a week, or two weeks. By the three week mark, Peggy was over it. Sighing, done shoving her head in the sand, she unlocked her phone and clicked on Pepper's smiling face.

Me: are you busy?

Pepper: no, what's up?

Me: would you mind terribly if I dropped by?

Pepper: of course! We'd love to see you!

Peggy couldn't help but smile down at the phone. If anyone would know what to do, it was Pepper. The screen flickered a bit before Steve's name lit up the screen. She gasped, phone service where the Avengers were stationed was spotty at best, and the newlyweds hadn't had regular contact since he left. She clicked the green button.

"Peggy?" Steve's voice was a little crackly, but it was there.

"Hello, darling!"

His smile rang loud and clear, "Hey, it's good to hear your voice! We finally got into the city so I thought I'd drop you a line."

"I miss you terribly."

"Me too," there was a pause, "Bucky says hi."

"Is he keeping an eye on you?"

"Yeah, he's a regular mother hen."

"I need to get him a backpack leash!" Bucky's exasperated voice called far from Steve's phone. "I'm trying to get him back to you in one piece but he keeps being stupid."

"Jerk." Steve tried to sound firm while mirth colored his words.

Peggy wasn't laughing, "Steve, please listen to Bucky."

"Hey, I'm ok, don't worry," his voice softened. She could hear his footsteps through the phone as the other men's voices drifted off. He was going somewhere private. "Bucky's just being Bucky. He still thinks of me as the scrawny kid he grew up with."

"I know, but please be careful, Steve," She chewed her lip.

"Is everything ok?"

Another pause. Peggy considered her options: tell him, and it could just be nothing. Don't tell him, it could be something, and not know when she would get another opportunity. "There's a chance I might be- oof!" Winston, ever an expert at timing, leapt onto Peggy.

"Peggy? Peggy, you ok?"

"Yes, fine, Winston just says hello."

Steve laughed, imagining Peggy on the couch, smothered in Winston hair. "Hey, buddy! You being a good boy?"

Winston barked the affirmative.

Peggy wrestled the dog down into her lap as she heard Sam call Steve's name.

"Hey, Peg, I've got to go. I'll call you when I get another chance, ok?"

She nodded, "alright. I love you."

"I love you too."

The line went dead, briefly flickering again. She looked down at the grinning Winston. "You're not being very helpful, you know."

Looking rather pleased with himself, he rewarded Peggy with a kiss on the chin. The drive to Pepper's passed relatively without incident, peppermints and wintergreen gum were becoming Peggy's primary line of defense. The house was beautiful in the snow, like it had been sprinkled with sugar. Wrong choice-the idea of sugar made Peggy's stomach lurch. She hustled outside the car, anxious to inhale the crisp, cold air.

"Aunt Peggy!" Morgan hugged her tightly around the waist. The little girl looked like a purple snowman, swaddled in snow pants, a coat, gloves and hat.

Peggy clenched her jaw against the swarming in her stomach. "Hello, love, how are you?" She purposefully bent down and held the girl at arm's length.

"I'm good, I miss you and Uncle Steve!"

She plastered a smile on her face, "we miss you too!"

Morgan wasn't convinced. "Are you ok? You don't look so good."

Peggy nodded, choking back her vomit, "fine, just fine. Hey, where's your mother?"

"In the house. Here," she took the woman by the hand and led her inside. A wall of warmth hit Peggy as soon as she crossed the threshold, thick with the smell of bread baking.

"Peggy, is that you? Peg-" Pepper didn't get a chance to finish her sentence before Peggy was careening toward the hall bathroom. Pepper, to her credit, wasn't phased, holding Peggy's hair back as she emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet. Finally, the Brit sat back, flushing and rinsing her mouth out in the sink.

Pepper gave her a sympathetic smile. "Hi," she said kindly.

"Hi."

"Is this why you wanted to see me?"

"I figured…that is to say…I am concerned," she groaned, putting her head in her hands. "If anyone would know, it would be you."

"You think you're pregnant?"

Peggy blushed furiously, still unaccustomed to what would have been vulgar language in 1945.

"How long has this been going on?"

"Nine and a half weeks."

"Jesus, Peg, did you take a test yet?"

"Excuse me?"

"A pregnancy test." The two women noticed that Morgan was still standing there. "Hey, Morg, can you go see if Peter and Bruce are here yet?" The little girl nodded, trotting outside. "No pregnancy tests in 1945, I'd imagine."

Peggy shook her head. "Nine and a half weeks wouldn't be quite enough waiting, yet."

"Well," Pepper sat down on the tile facing Peggy, "do you want to find out?"

Hesitantly, she nodded. "Can't hurt, I suppose."

Turning, Pepper opened the cabinet under the sink and produced a purple box. She held it out to Peggy.

"You just have them on hand?"

Pepper smiled. "I have some girlfriends that make some…less than stellar choices as to who they sleep with."

"Ah, I see." Peggy read the back of the box. "This is a little vulgar."

"Three minutes and we have answers." Pepp cocked her head, "does Steve know what you're thinking?"

"No."

"Do you want him to know?"

Peggy continued to read, "I'm not sure yet. I don't know when he's coming home and I wouldn't want him to be…distracted."

"Or it would give him something to look forward to." She tried to read Peggy's face, "do you want kids?"

Peggy sighed out her nose. "I hadn't thought of it, really. I didn't have a boyfriend before Steve but I guess I always thought maybe that I'd eventually," she didn't finish the sentence. Children had admittedly never been on her radar. But now, with the possibility so close at hand, who knew? She took a fortifying breath, leveling her chin with the floor. "I guess we won't know until we know. If you'd excuse me."

Pepper stood, "good luck," and shut the door.

Peggy locked the door, sliding her finger under the seam of the box. "Damn undignified."

/

Steve leaned against a wide glass table, Sam and Bucky flanking him on either side. A holographic image of the town spun slowly before him.

"What are you thinking?" Rhodey asked, his robotic legs humming softly as he strode into the room.

"I'm thinking our enemy is different than I remember them," Steve muttered.

Rhodey sat, crossing his metal limbs. "How so?" Rhodey had spent the day discussing a more diplomatic solution with Berlin officials while Steve, Sam, and Bucky studied the positioning of the Hydra headquarters.

"They're kids," Bucky clarified. "High schoolers at best."

Rhodey furrowed his brows, "that's it? What do a bunch of kids want with Hydra?"

"Maybe they think it makes them look cool, like a gang or something? Bunch of outcast kids wanting to fit in somewhere?" Sam offered.

Thor shook his massive blonde head, "mere boys were frequently the fiercest warriors in Asgard. They do not as yet have the sense to be afraid."

"What do a bunch of kids want with Hydra, or what does Hydra want with a bunch of kids?" Steve mused.

"You think it's a front?" Sam questioned. "Hydra would go that far?"

Bucky shook his head, "there's no line for them."

"Yeah but," Sam searched the eyes of the grown men around him, "they're kids."

"We can't get in there undetected," Rhodey leaned forward, steepling his fingers against his lips, "we've got ten-odd years and up on all these guys. We won't make it thirty feet."

"What did the officials say?" Steve asked.

Rhodey shook his head, "they want them alive, which I'm on board for knowing how young these guys are. Grown adults are one thing but them?" he shook his head again.

A silence settled over the room.

"So we all thinking it?" Sam's eyes flit from the table to Steve.

"Thinking what?" Thor's mouth was pressed in a hard line.

Bucky shook his head hard, "absolutely not."

"What?" Steve felt lost.

"I mean-" Rhodey started.

" No," Bucky raised his voice, "hard no."

"Will someone please explain what's going on?"

Sam studied the frustration on Steve's face until realization dawned. "Look-"

"No, I'm with Bucky."

"Steve-"

" No! He's a kid!"

"He's the only one that will blend."

Thor was aghast, "you want the spiderling?"

"Rhodey!" Steve's eyes plead with James, begging him to be the voice of reason here.

The man answered with silence.

"He will be able to enter undetected," Thor volunteered, stroking his beard.

Sam nodded, "we need eyes on the inside."

"Rhodey, c'mon," Steve plead again. "You can't be ok with this, he's seventeen!"

"Eighteen," Sam corrected.

"You shut up," Bucky answered darkly.

"Both of you, knock it off," Steve stared hard at Rhodey.

Rhodey sighed, "he's grown."

"Barely!"

"Steve," it was Thor's turn to silence the captain with a look.

"A compromise," Rhodey said suddenly, "in two weeks, we put it to Peter. He said from the jump he wanted to come, if we're still here in two weeks, we ask him."

Bucky and Steve glanced at each other, quickly feeling the tides turn against them. "If Peter comes on this mission, one of us watches from a distance and another is on the ground with him. He might be grown in the eyes of the law," Steve allowed, "but he's green."

"Not really," Sam started.

" Sam," Steve was fighting against the urge to lose it, "he's green. If that means we pull more people from home to protect the kid, I won't lose any sleep at night." Silence. "Agreed?"

The men nodded their ascent, save for Bucky, who had stalked from the room.

/

Unable to look at the test, Peggy stashed it in the cabinet above the toilet before trucking out to the kitchen. Wordlessly, Pepper raised her eyebrows at Peggy, who shrugged.

"What does that mean?"

"I haven't looked yet," Peggy said as she sat at the table. A mug of peppermint tea was waiting for her.

"It only takes three minutes," Pepper said, glancing at the clock.

"I just can't look at it yet. I will before I go, I promise."

"As long as you-"

"Hey, everyone! Happy Sunday!" Bruce's big green head poked in the door; his bespectacled smile obscured by steam. "I brought homemade chili!"

Peggy was fighting for her life. In the coming hours, she was able to choke down some cornbread from Peter's Aunt May and tea, as well as a few spoonful's of chili to be polite. She had never partaken in such a dish before, one that Dr. Banner assured her was a staple of American cuisine.

"Every region makes it differently," Peter offered, "like in Cincinnati, they put it on top of spaghetti with cheese."

She wanted to die.

Pepper slid her another mug of peppermint tea.

"Peter, why don't you clear the table?" Aunt May asked pointedly. She wasn't sure what was wrong with Peggy, but she was awfully pale. "Peggy, do you need anything?"

Peggy shook her head and offered a bracing smile, "fine, just fine."

"Is the chili not agreeing with you?"

"Um-"

" Ow!"

Everyone's head whirled toward the sink, where Peter was clutching his finger.

"What happened?" May asked, starting for her nephew.

"I'm fine, I reached in the sink and I guess I grabbed a knife on accident."

"Band-Aids are in the bathroom cabinet," Pepper offered as she divided leftovers into plastic containers.

"I got it!" Morgan called before heading down the hall.

Peggy blew out her nose, grateful for the distraction. Oh God. "Um, Morgan, really quickly," she began, but was too late.

Morgan stood in the hallway outside the bathroom, holding the pregnancy test by the edges. "Uh, hey guys?"

Peggy stopped, hand frozen in midair.

"I don't know who this belongs to, but it says 'yes, 9-10.' So," she looked up, eyes settling on Peggy, "that's cool, I guess?" She handed it to her, then resumed looking for the band aid.

Peggy stared down at the plastic stick.

No one said anything.

Peggy was afraid to look up, finally dragging her eyes to meet Pepper's. The blonde was fighting to urge to smile, waiting to gauge her friend's reaction.

"So," Peggy began. Her insides felt warm as her eyes brimmed. A smile broke across her face, "I guess now we know!"

The room erupted. Everyone was thrilled, Pepper giving her a phone number for her doctor, May offering her a recipe for some Italian cure for morning sickness. It sounded dubious at best, but Peggy was willing to try anything at this point. Morgan was confused but excited at the prospect of a baby. Only Bruce's smile didn't quite reach his eyes. Peggy waited to breach the topic until Morgan was in bed and May had headed for home with Peter.

"Dr. Banner?" Peggy asked.

He was seated on the couch in the living room, and kindly stood when she entered. "You know, you can call me Bruce."

She perched on an overstuffed armchair. "Bruce," she searched for the right words, "I noticed your subdued reaction. What are you thinking?"

Bruce shook his head, "just surprised, is all."

"You can't lie to me. You're far too honest, and you forget my experience in espionage."

He faced her. "I've been experimenting on plants, chickens and pigs with another prototype version of Dr. Erskine's serum."

Peggy raised her eyebrows, "do you mean to use it on others?"

"No, God no. The Government would have my green hide and that's someone I don't want to tangle with. It was more to study yours and Steve's coming life experiences. All species that I've given the serum to have been hardy, stronger, and maintained younger characteristics longer than average."

There was something he wasn't telling her. "But? Your eyes are full of 'but.'"

"The…offspring. The ones that get one or two copies of the serum gene show the same characteristics as their parents. They grow like their non-serum having counterparts until young adulthood, then aging slows. But the ones that have no copies of serum genes," he sighed. "They don't...they don't survive birth." He studied her face.

Peggy nodded, "go on, I want to know."

"There's a higher risk of miscarriage and stillbirth beyond the first trimester mark."

The digits 9 and 10 swam before Peggy's eyes.

"Peggy, if I had known this was on the table before we brought you here…if I'd known that you and Steve were planning on children-"

"It's not your fault, Bruce."

"I know, but still."

"You didn't even know we were married. It was a secret. You couldn't have known about any of this."

The pair sat in silence. "I'm really sorry, Peggy."

"What are the odds?"

"I'm sorry?"

"The odds. The odds that this doesn't go well."

Bruce's head bobbed from side to side. "Difficult to say. Considering we don't know what percentage of your genes were changed, or the strength of the serum in your body," he sat a moment, eyes doing calculations Peggy couldn't hope to comprehend. "I'd say fifty percent."

"Fifty per-" agitated, Peggy blew out her nose. "I don't want Steve to know until he comes home."

"Is that wise?"

"It's my choice," she said sharper than she'd intended. "I want to tell him in person and for him to ask you any questions he may have."

Bruce nodded, "very well. I think, with your permission, it would be best if we met regularly throughout your pregnancy."

"I agree, you know more about this than I certainly do. In your opinion, should I still meet with the doctor Pepper recommended?"

Bruce nodded emphatically, "yeah, I'm not that kind of doctor."

"Should they know about the serum?"

"At the end of the day, it's at your discretion. It's your body, your child."

She pondered a moment, "I think better that they not."

The floor creaked behind them. Pepper appeared at the top of the basement stairs. "Am I interrupting?" She held a white box in her hands.

"No, no not at all, please," Peggy said, gesturing for Pepper to sit.

Pepper sat, hands folded excitedly. "I know it might be too early, but I was ransacking some old boxes in the basement from when I was pregnant with Morgan, and I found this." She passed it to Peggy.

"A doppler?"

"You can hear the baby's heartbeat with it."

Peggy's heart squeezed painfully. The idea of her baby having a heartbeat, when the odds were no better than a coin flip, "thank you."

Bruce, as if reading her mind, gave her a slight nod and a small smile.

Before she left, she squeezed his massive green hand. "Thank you, Bruce. I'm sure that was difficult to tell me." The Hulk was noticeably thrown, but nodded kindly. That night, Peggy lay in the dark in her half empty bed, wishing Steve were there. If she used the doppler, there may be nothing. That would mean it was too early to hear, or there wasn't a heartbeat. But if she didn't, she would be wondering for the rest of the night, or at least until her appointment with Pepper's doctor on Tuesday. What would Steve want?

Steve would want to know. Even if there was only a heartbeat for the night, Steve would want to know. Peggy sat up, turned the light on, and read the instructions. She lay back down, took a deep breath, and pressed the wand to her abdomen. At first, nothing. Then, a little further down, a little deeper, a sound like a rapid swishing back and forth filled her ears. She texted Bruce on Tuesday after her appointment,

Me: 160 beats per minute. They asked me if Steve was tall, I guess the baby's measuring

closer to eleven weeks. The doctor said I should expect him mid-November. Could that

have something to do with the serum?

Dr. Banner: maybe…I've had a few subjects be slightly larger than average

Me: for what it's worth, he's the size of a plum

/

Steve sighed, very little progress had been made since the argument two weeks ago. He imagined Peggy at home, experiencing her first New York spring. It would still feel like winter, but the first overture of spring would be in the air. Peter would be here any minute. He'd been gone longer than any of them ever thought, twelve weeks in all. Right around three months since he'd last seen Peggy face to face, hugged her, kissed her.

"Hey, Cap!" Peter called, grinning ear to ear.

"Peter, good to see you. I-" Steve was cut off by Peter hugging him.

"How excited are you?"

Steve stepped back, looking between the kid and Bucky, who'd picked him up from the airport. Bucky shrugged, as confused as his friend. "About…what?"

Peter screwed his face up, "what do you mean 'what'? You're not excited about Peggy? About the b-" Peter caught himself. "You know what, it's been a minute since I saw Sam, I'll go track him down." He hustled off any where Steve wasn't.

Bucky studied Steve's face from where he stood opposite him around the glass table. Steve's eyes darted back and forth, mentally doing math.

"Steve?"

Steve didn't say anything.

"Steve?" Bucky prompted again.

He finally looked up at his friend, "I need to call Peggy."

Is it even the Avengers if Tom Holland doesn't spoil something?