Chapter 10: Thanks and No Thanks

By the next morning, the Galladoorn and Cashmere soldiers were celebrating their victory over Nockmaar. The soldiers had gathered in the Great Hall to feast, drink, and make merry, thankful to be alive. Ronan and Cayne took great joy in the festivities. However, Airk did not join them since he discovered Raina on the battlefield. He remained in the infirmary and would not leave Raina's side. He could not celebrate while the woman he just pledged himself to was wounded. As Airk sat by Raina's side, he couldn't help but feel a chill up his spine as he looked at Raina's injuries, fearing the worst. Airk began to recall the slim soldier who had come to his aid during the battle. He did not get a look at the soldier's face, but only the soldier's golden blonde hair under his helm. As he looked at her wounds, Airk knew Raina put up a brave fight against a force beyond her strength and he was taken aback by her courage. He knew that Raina was stronger than the metal her blade was crafted with to endure what she did.

"You've got to keep fighting. You've been fighting this whole time. Keep fighitng," he whispered.

Before long, Ronan came to bursting in. "Airk, where have you been hiding? We've been missing you."

"I'm sure the party can do find without me," Airk said.

Ronan looked down at the wounded Raina grimly. "How fares the lady?"

"She hasn't woken up since the battle, and I'm afraid," Airk said.

"You, afraid? You're a Knight of Galladoorn. You'll probably be a General one day. What do you have to be afraid of?" Ronan laughed.

"I'm afraid because I just told her I loved her, and now I could lose her," Airk said. "I promised my mother when I met her that I would take care of her, and now I may have failed. She was there on the battlefield the whole time and I never knew."

"Did you expect a woman like her to stay behind when you tell her to?" Ronan asked.

"No, it would not be like her at all," Airk said, a small smile on his face. "And I would admire her less if she did."

"Admirable as your girlfriend may be, she was foolish to be where she shouldn't have," Ronan said.

"Do I have to spell it out?" Airk said. "Don't you remember that soldier who saved our sorry carcasses so the reinforcements could enter?"

Ronan's eyes grew large and he held a hand to his mouth in shock. "She was the soldier who saved us?"

"That's right, and you should be kissing her butt right now," Airk said.

"When she recovers, I'll make sure she is treated like a queen she is," Ronan said.

"I'm sure you will," Airk said, "There's only one other person who should be here: Where's Madmartigan?"

"No one has seen him," Ronan said. "He'll get his just deserts, don't worry."

"If he's not in this infirmary, I'll put him here after what he just did," Airk said.

"Don't worry, Airk. You just worry about your lady. We'll deal with Madmartigan," Ronan said.

"I hope you find him before I do," Airk said.

"And I hope Raina recovers speedily," Ronan said. "Are you sure you don't want to join the celebrations?"

"No, you go on. I'll be fine," Airk said.

Ronan nodded and proceeded onto the Great Hall. Airk spent the rest of the night in the infirmary sleeping by Raina's side, holding her hand as he did so.

The next week, Airk awoke once more by the wounded Raina's side. Raina's condition had not improved since the battle in Cashmere. Airk tried nurse his anger as Madmartigan had abandoned the battle. Although he was furious with Madmartigan, Airk did his best to put his feelings aside for Raina's sake. As Airk continued to stay by Raina's side, his mother came to his side.

"Airk, my son, please, you have not eaten for days. Come, you must eat something," Larissa said.

"Mother, I cannot," Airk said glumly. "She hasn't shown any improvement in a week. I'm not leaving her side until she wakes."

"Son, you don't need to protect this woman forever," Larissa said.

"No, you don't understand," Airk said. "You told me the moment you brought Raina here to protect her. She was on that battlefield the entire time, and I had no idea. I failed her and you. "

"Airk, I know about Raina's being on the battlefield that day," Larissa said. "Her presence on the battlefield was not her fault or yours. Everyone makes a choice; the consequences of that choice are no cause for blame. Raina was meant to be by your side in Cashmere, just as you were meant to be by hers."

"There's a bit of truth in there," Airk said. "I just wish she wasn't like this."

"A lot of times we wish for something different," Larissa said. "But we have to know some dark times in order to know how to endure. I have heard of Raina's ordeal. She fought off a force far greater than she could imagine and still she fights. I admire her spirit. If it were up to me, she'd be a knight already."

"I'm glad you agree with me," Airk said.

"She will make a fine Galladoorn warrior one day," Larissa said.

"Thank you, Mother, "Airk said.

"Are you sure I can't convince you to eat?" Larissa asked.

"No, I want to stay with her," Airk said.

"Very well. Let me know if she changes," Larissa said.

Larissa left her son alone once more with Raina. Airk felt himself feeling lighter, as his mother's words brought him comfort in some small manner. Although Airk was comforted by his mother's gentle words, his guilt would not be assuaged until Raina had awakened.

Finally, that night, as Airk slept once more by Raina's side, he felt a squeeze on his hand. As soon as he felt something squeeze his hand, Airk awoke, Wearily, Airk looked up and saw Raina slowly opening her eyes.

"Raina!" he gasped, kissing her hand.

"Airk," Raina said weakly. "Looks like I screwed up again."

"No, no, no. Don't think that for one moment, my love," Airk said.

"Good, because I was just kidding," Raina laughed grimly. "It was either you or me; better me than you."

"I'm glad you still have a sense of humor," Airk laughed. "You gave so much that day. You saved us all and more. There is no need to give any more."

"You don't get it, do you? I would've rather died on that battlefield than spend one minute without you. There is no living without you."

Raina's words went through Airk's heart like a sharpened sword. His heart wouldn't stop pounding and he dazed, as if he'd been whacked with a shield. He couldn't find his words for a long moment.

"I feel the same about you," Airk said. "I was glad to have you by my side that day."

"I wouldn't have had it any other way," Raina said. "There was no way I was letting you go alone."

"I don't think I need to tell you you are the bravest woman I've ever known," Airk said. "I wouldn't have wanted anyone else to save me."

"You're welcome," Raina laughed.

"You get your rest, my love. You need it," Airk said.

"I've been resting enough. I need a little exercise," Raina said.

"Please, stay here and recover. You've been through enough," Airk said.

"Alright, only for you," Raina said.

As Raina fell into sleep, Airk held her hand until her eyes closed. When he finally left the infirmary, he found Larissa outside.

"How is our brave lady, Airk?" she asked.

"She fares better tonight, mother," he said. "She is weak, but she is slowly on the mend."

"I am glad, my son. She is a valiant woman," Larissa said.

"I'm glad you share my opinion," Airk said, "I just wish she didn't have to save me."

"You can't change that and she wouldn't have hadn't it either way," Larissa said..

"I know," Airk said sadly.

Just then, Airk caught sight of Madmartigan passing in the corner of his eye. Suddenly, Airk was filled with a blood-boiling, uncontrollable rage.

"Excuse me, mother," Airk said.

Airk charged toward Madmartigan, threw his strongest punch, and slammed him against the wall.

"Ow! What was that for!" Madmartigan said indignantly.

"Where the heck have you been? You abandoned us! You left us to die! Where were you?" Airk screamed.

"Okay, I confess. I deserted you. That's because the Princess Carissima made me a better offer. I love her, Airk. I've loved her for months before the battle. We've been in love in secret. I made a choice. Abandon her or you. I chose her," Madmartigan said.

"That would be great if that wasn't the biggest load of bull crap I've ever heard!" Ark said.

"I thought if anyone would understand it would be you. You have Raina, you hypocrite!" Madmartigan growled.

"And that is why I'm pissed at you!" Airk said. "You abandoned us and left us to slaughter. Raina followed us to battle, and no thanks to you, she saved us all! Because of you, she's laying in the infirmary recovery from wounds she never would have gotten if you had been there."

"Your girlfriend saved the entire army?" Madmartigan asked.

"She wouldn't have needed to if you had been there," Airk said. "You should go down to the infirmary and kiss her butt instead of hiding for the last few days."

Madmartigan sighed hard. "You're right. I'm sorry. I feel guilty for abandoning you, even though it was for Carissima. I'm sorry for what happened to Raina. I promise I'll come down to the infirmary to see her. Just don't let anyone know I was with Carissima that day."

"What? You want me to make you a promise after you screwed up? I should turn you over right now!" Airk said incredulously.

"Airk, please. You can't turn me over. I'll lose Carissima, my knighthood, everything. You can't say anything. Please!" Madmartigan begged.

"Fine, but the next time you screw up, I won't be there to save your stupid butt and you're screwed, got it?" Airk said.

"Fair enough" Madmartigan agreed.

Although Airk still felt like taking Madmartigan and throwing him through a wall, he was glad Madmartigan agreed to apologize to Raina. He just hoped that he wasn't making a terrible mistake letting Madmartigan off easy.

The next morning, Madmartigan made good on his promise to Airk. Airk had gone to the hall to bring food to Raina and when he returned, he found Madmartigan sitting by Raina's side.

"Well, well, what are you doing here?" Airk asked, setting the tray down beside Raina.

Madmartigan looked at Raina's wounds and shivered. "You told me she was on the battlefield. I didn't know how bad she was hurt. I should've been there."

"Well, you're here now," Airk said.

Just then, Raina slowly awoke. "Airk."

"Hey there, soldier," Madmartigan whispered.

Raina's eyes flashed at Madmartigan. "If I had strength to punch you, I would."

"I know I'm the last person you want to see right now," Madmartigan said. "I abandoned you and I shouldn't have. I get it. You're in here because of me. I came here to make up for it. I don't want you to forgive me. I just want to make up for what I did."

Raina remained silent for a moment. Although she was still plenty furious with Madmartigan, she could not deny that he was making effort to make up for his mistakes.

"I can't accept your apology," Raina said. "You abandoned us and I don't care why because it'll never be a good enough reason. Yet, you are making the effort to make up for your mistakes. For that, I am grateful."

"I'm glad," Madmartigan said. "I'll let you rest. If you need anything, we won't be far away."

"Good to know," Raina said.

Although he knew Raina might never forgive him, Madmartigan was only glad that he at least able to patch up the wounds of the situation he created. Although it was a small measure, he felt it was a big step toward putting things right. Little did Madmartigan know, his situation was about to get much worse.