I'M ALIVE. MORE INFO ON WHERE I'VE BEEN LATER. ENJOY THIS SHITSHOW!
Location: The 'Beast's Castle' (Six's POV)
Time: 13:00
Took us a few minutes to get inside and by golly did the interior lighten the hell up. When we arrived it was like someone ripped the insides of Vault 11 and slapped it in a medieval setting, now the damn place isn't straining my sanity!
Anyways, after reconciling with the now-human servants, the five of us decided it was probably the best time to explain what in brahmin shit is going on…
"So…" I started "I take it everyone is a bit uh…"
"Sbalordito than a Moolie smoking dope in Hu- CAZZO THAT HURTS BELLA!" Vito interrupted before getting smacked hard in the face by a rather pissed off Belle.
"I may be in love with you Vito, but control your langu-" Belle retorted back before another voice screamed, this time from the Elite.
"JESUS CHRIST JUST GET ON WITH IT. I NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHERE THE FUCK IS WILSON." 3650 screamed back to the troubled couple. "seriously what the fuck was the OP of this story smoking when writing this?" [Wild Wasteland]
"Thank you 36. Anyways, I gathered you all here for a pseudo introductory meeting on who the hell we are before anyone else thinks we're crazy. Got it?" I replied, all nodded. "Good."
"Let's have Vito Scalletta tell his side of the story, then pass it onto the Elite." I said pointing at the former Empire Bay gunman. Sighing, he began;
"Like I said earlier, My name is Vito Scaletta. I was born in Sicily, 1925. I moved to the U.S when I was a kid after my family was hitting some rough times in the homeland, hoping for the 'American dream'" He chuckled, "American dream my ass..."
"As you might've guessed, things went to shit the minute we stepped from the docks. My father got a job working the docks we got off and what little money we got went to his booze. Having enough, I resorted to crime after meeting my life-long pal Joe Barbaro.. We did well until 1943. I was caught and since it was the Second World War, was drafted into the Military." I softly glared as he continued his story, thinking of that time-period.
"After getting injured in '45, I was sent home where I found out my dad took out a 5,000 dollar loan before he died. So Me, Joe, and an affiliate named Henry did some work for the Clemente crime Family... And then I got fucking caught by the feds and sent to Jail." Belle froze and was about to speak before Vito raised her hand to not and continued speaking,
"It wasn't pretty I know. During my time in there Mama died and my Sister married a lousey greaseball." He sneered, "Anyways I was let out early in '51, met back with Joe, did some odd ball jobs for another crime Family, took out Clemente the hard way, and... " He paused as he looked down at the floor with Belle holding one of his hands, "Lost my friends." He muttered.
"As for how I got here... After being escorted into another car about to head out of Empire Bay, some Micks collided with our vehicle and took me out. Next thing I knew I was born here and... The rest is History." He finished.
"Vito, I'm... So sorry you went through that." Belle said, breaking the silence and holding his face. "If it's of any interest to you, I also lost my maman when I was little but.." She paused, "Nothing to the degree of that. I'm always here for you Monsieur but promise me one thing. Will you Love me?" She quizzed back to the former Mob-Man, who softly smiled,
"Of course Bella and... Thanks signora." He replied as (to nobody's surprise even to me and 3650), started kissing her again.
"You two should seriously get a room" I chuckled, as the two stopped to glare at me before Belle continued.
"I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that" she replied, before glaring at Vito, "Also, why did you call me Bella ea-"
"Do I need to explain to you Signora that I'm from the Old Country?" Vito smirked to the bookworm.
"And I'm from a remote village here! At least you're not Gaston!" Belle refuted back.
Vito, confused on that name decided to ask. "I'm sorry.. Who?"
"Gaston's... A womanizing ass from my village who'd try anything to get me to marry Him.." Belle answered back, noticing Vito not trying to laugh.
"What?" Belle replied, "What's so funny?"
"Nothin.. Nothin… Just the way's you described 'im reminds me of how Joe is back in Empire Bay!" Scaletta laughed, reminiscing of Joe's pickup lines. Could've sworn I heard in the distance something about a 'Rosie Palm and her five sisters' until Belle screamed like she saw Lanius for the first time.
"YOU WERE FRIENDS WITH A GASTON IMPERSONATOR?" I couldn't help but join in laughing too at these two arguing before breaking it up.
"Alright, that's enough for you two. We'll get to ya later Vito" I butted in. "Anyways, think it's time for our Cyclopes friend here to c-"
"Ah! Courier! There you are." A new voice rang over my Pip-Boy, it was House.
"Oh! Hey House. Guessing you heard the whole thing?" I questioned back.
"Yes. I did. However, I am not here to dawdle on such stories of the past." House exclaimed through the Pip-Boy before sensing the rest in the room.
"I see some people here have never met my presence or name…" His voice chirped before continuing, "I am Robert Edwin House. Founder of Rob-Co Robotics and ruler of the Vegas Strip." He boomed.
"That's nice boss" I replied. "But any updates on the strip?
"The chaos has mostly died down after the incident but alas, that is not what I'm here for." He paused, before facing his attention directly at me. "I've gotten updates from Raul and Mr. Graham and so far have been no signs of Maurice anywhere in the forest. It's as if he vanished into thin air.. If I had more Rob-Co Satellites in this world it'd be much easier to track, but alas that isn't the case.." House paused as he brought up the Pip-Boy's local map before continuing.
"In the meantime, your companions ran into willingly helpful cooperators. Phillip and… Aurora are their names if I recall. I've also scored a deal to cheer up Vito Scaletta." Me and Vito went pale at House's last sentence. 'Prince Phillip. The same prince who slayed a dragon turned Bounty Hunter ala Colonel Mortimer style is now riding with my crew!?'
"That's neat but there is one question I just have to ask." I paused, preparing for the dreaded question that I'm letting loose. "Is... The Sierra Madre and Big M.T also in this world?" The remaining folks browed their eyes at me until I heard his voice sighed.
"Sufficed to say Junior, but I'm afraid so." I paled harder than snow white right then and there. If the Legion remnants were bad enough, then the toxic red clouds from that effing casino is Hell incarnate.
"I... Figured." I sighed, "We'll pack up and rendezvous with my compatriots. In the meantime house, try getting ahold of the ruling forces he-"
"I already planned that out and want You and Victor to attend in case of any situation to arise." House chimed, interrupting my sentence.
"While I cannot believe I am saying this, but Victor will be awaiting for you at Cinderella's Castle. From there, head back to the Lucky38. Good Luck Courier"
And with that, House left my Pip-Boy's Screen.
For a few moments everything was silent... That was until we heard some knocking.
"I'll get it!" Belle said. As she was about to open the door, it flung wide open and was knocked off her feet. Coming into the room was two insanely Italian men and a bi-pedal turret. One of the men was dressed in a tuxedo and looked like he'd seen some shit and the other was wearing a brown jacket and Hawaiian… WAIT. HOUSE WHAT THE FU-
"VITO! MIO FRATELLO! HOW'VE YA FUCKIN BEEN?" The fat one screamed out loud as I saw him walk up to Vito.
"WAI WOAH WOAH JOE!? HENRY!? H- HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GUYS GET HERE!?"
"After I died, I got sent to some fuckin' Idunno… Greek-Jewish Reaper with blue skin and a bath-robe? Stayed there 'till a man on a screen resurrected my ass and brought me 'ere.."
"Well, 'least you ain't swarmed by the Yellows in Chinatown.. Welcome back Henry. Waitaminute, how the fuck you'd get here Joe?"
"Remember the five bucks you owe me-DANNAZIONE WHERE'D YOU FIND THIS DAME VITO!? YOU SETTLIN DOWN ALREADY?" Joe teased as he eyed Belle.
"WE'RE NOT THAT FAR IN YET/NOUS NE SOMMES PAS SI LOIN ENCORE" Both yelled back before angrily looking away.
"HA! YOU ACTUALLY ARE! CAN YOU BELIEVE IS HENRY? VITO'S GETTING SOFT IN THE ASS HERE!" Joe finished before breaking down laughing over a blushed Belle and Vito.
I turned around to see 3650 breaking down over the turret reciting the 'Wilson' line from a Pre-War film repeatedly between sobs [Wild Wasteland].
"I think I drank too much scotch today." I muttered.
"Ya think/Beeps in Yes" The two answered back.
Location: New Orleans, Louisiana (POV Change)
Time: 23:00 (Several Hours Earlier the next day):
Back in the bayous outside of New Orleans, our two armed maniacs Caleb and Postal Dude were taking a rest from murdering half the swamp's wildlife population with Dynamite, lead, napalm, disembodied cow-heads, and of course the D-
"Damnit will you hurry it up back there?" Caleb groaned, "Getting tired of waiting for your little piss break."
"Hey it's not my fault when a guy's gotta make the flowers grow!" He snarked back, before a rather loud zipping noise reverbed around the two men.
"Thank Christ it's not Paradise Arizona." Postal dude continued as he grabbed his signature serrated shovel, "Half the fuckers there will simply want your head o-" he trailed off when the two heard what sounded like a fight going on in a small boat.
Caleb, upon hearing it grabbed out a bundle of remote dynamite "Want to investigate that?" the maniacle gunslinger silently cackled.
"Sure!" Postal Dude replied, "let me do all the talking. I'm a bonified people's person" he snickered, pulling out something rather familiar.
As he got closer, The Dude got glimpses of what appeared to be three greasy rednecks fighting the same frogs from earlier, one of them pulled out a home-made double barrel and fired it nearly hitting one of the man's private partsa-
Seeing his chance The Dude sprouted up and started to interrogate the men.
"HI THERE! WOULD YOU LIKE TO SIGN THIS PETITON?" All five stopped and turned to see a cheerful Postal dude, pointing an Mp5 right at the redneck's faces in one hand whilst holding a clipboard with the words "Make Obese Man-Children Stop Writing 30 Million Wordcounted Fanfictions"
"W- Whatchu doin in our parts 'ere b-" the smartest of the bunch replied before getting his head pierced by a 9mm.
"SIGN THIS PETITION OR IT'LL BE YOUR SURVIVING FAMILY MEMBERS" He screamed whilst watching the surviving two row away in fright before blowing into a million pieces, much to the frog's horrors.
"Oops, botched that one. I wonder how much their remains would go for on eBay..." The Dude said. "Yo Caleb! Any good ammunition?"
"Hehe. Just some shellys f-" Before Caleb could finish, another voice broke out.
"OH HEAVENS ABOVE IT'S YOU THREE AGAIN!?" The female one asked.
"Oh hey! It's the talking frogs again an- WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT A BIPEDAL GATOR AND BEARDED FIRE-FLY?" The Dude exclaimed as He and Caleb rised their weapons at the 'bipedal gator and firefly'.
"DON' U DARE LAY A SINGA FINGER ON CHER./I AIN'T PREPARED FOR THIS!" 'The gator yelled out again as he jumped back into a razor pricked bush screaming in agony. The Dude sighing continued to berate them with more Postal 2 Quotes
"Hey, it's not my fault, book-"
"LISTEN I AINT GOT NO TI-"
"Hang on Tiana- I got dis.." The other frog said in a weird accent.
"Apologies for the waitress's behavior, I am Prince Navee-" Before he can finished he was squished by The Dude's Shovel before continuing in a weakly tone.
"..of Maldonia."
"...What the fuck is a Maldonia?" Both maniacs answered in confusion.
"Sir, I questioned that several times and gotten nowhere… I'm Tiana. The gator you just covered in thorns and firefly is Louis and Ray." The first frog answered before continuing.
"I saw you two earlier at the party breaking into Lotties room about a fairy of sorts?" She asked confused.
"Something like that sweetcakes" Caleb snickered, "Call me Caleb. Tweedle-dum over there is The Postal Dude" He said pointing at the dude only to get a light "Fuck You" from the Running with Scissors Maniac as he stepped in to continue.
"Anyways, want us to help your friend Jimmy Joe Billy Bob out of those bushes?" He asked.
"THAT'D BE'A WONDERFUL TO RAYMON'S LIGHTY BUTT!"
"Ray… Just don't." Tiana replied back.
After a short period of getting Louis unstuck from the bush, Caleb continued the conversation.
"So how did our little froggies end up in this situation, hm?" He started before The Dude butted in.
"Yeah it better be a good explanation for making us waltz through this shithole state wasting ammo on leeches and… other stuff?"
He awkwardly finished to a death-staring Louis as the night drags on with Tiana telling the two men tales of shadowmen, voodoo kings, and being roped in unwillingly by a lousy prince...
AN: MONKEY ON A MULE THIS SHIT WAS HARD TO WRITE.
Okay so. Finally got this chapter done. Burnouts from writing this, other hobbies, a hacked Discord account, and work does that to a man coked-up on archiving stuff on the PRR.
Reviews have been slow but thanks either way! Writing fics like this without sounding insane cough cough Loud House Multi Fic with 30 Million words and disrespectful 9/11 and pearl harbor chapters, E rated gooner fics meant to sadists and FBI watchlists, etc cough cough.
Anyways yeah.. Vito's got his buddies back, Wilson exists, and even in Animated movies, The Dude cant get people's petitions.
Oh. To answer anyone's question, yes the Sierra Madre and Big. Mt are here. How animated characters'll react with the toxic cloud is anyone's guess for now... R&R.