The Wanderer
by BynWho
Disclaimer: This is a work of fanfic for entertainment purposes only. All characters and plots from the BBC show Merlin belong to the BBC. All other characters and plots belong to BynWho. No copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: Arthur and Merlin are missing. Marian and Gwaine's friendship is in tatters. And, with the king's life at stake, Marian realizes Fate has come to collect.
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Righting the Wrongs
After the wounded had been cared for and the dead laid to rest, the army returned from Camlann. Despite their tearful reunion, Marian and Gwaine didn't speak much on the journey home. Their main focus was finding their king, and only then could they reconcile.
Gwen sent out more search parties, but there were no signs of Arthur, Merlin, or Gaius. Marian found her in one of the lesser-used corridors, staring at the stone courtyard below. "We'll find them, Gwen."
"I have to believe that. It's the only thing keeping me sane."
Standing next to her, Marian grasped her hand and tried to give her a comforting smile. "I'm sure Gaius and Merlin are with him. If he's injured, he's with the best healers in the five kingdoms."
"I know you hope that to be true, Marian, but if what the others saw is true, Mordred…" she couldn't say it, "before Arthur slayed him. Who knows what evil was in Mordred's heart or what magic he could have used to…" Gwen bent her head, letting her tears flow freely.
Marian wanted to give Gwen some hope. Her heart battled with her mind. Should she tell her about Merlin's magic? That Arthur had a better chance of survival because his servant was the most powerful wizard on the planet?
Gwen frowned when she saw the indecision on Marian's face. "What is it? What do you want to tell me?"
Marian took a breath. But before she could say anything, hoofbeats sounded from below. Gwen gasped when she looked out of the window. "Gaius!"
They took off to go down to meet Gaius, but by the time they reached the stairs, Gwaine had already led him to them.
Gwen rushed forward and grabbed Gaius's hand. "Gaius!"
"My lady." His grim face betrayed him. Something was wrong.
"Tell me," Gwen said.
"He's alive."
Gwen and Gwaine let out sighs of relief while Marian held her breath, waiting to hear what she already knew was true.
"Then why isn't he with you?" Gwaine asked.
Gaius held onto Gwen's hand to deliver the bad news.
"He's wounded." He reached inside his robes and pulled out the royal seal, placing it in Gwen's hand. "He wanted me to give this to you, my lady."
Gwen shook her head as she took the seal, desperate to believe Arthur would be okay. "Where is he?"
"There is a place where he may be saved. Merlin is taking him there as we speak."
"Avalon," Marian said. "He's taking him to Avalon, isn't he, Gaius?"
He nodded.
In the stories, it was Avalon. Trying to save him, Morgana and the Nine Sisters took Arthur to Avalon after he was mortally wounded. Funny thing, legends. They got it so wrong.
"Then we must send the knights." Gwen turned to Gwaine. "Ready as many men as you can—"
Gaius interrupted. "No, my lady. Merlin can cope by himself."
"Merlin?"
"You must trust him."
"How can one man be as strong as an army?" Gwen asked in a panic.
"Morgana's forces are still searching for Arthur. Two men traveling alone stand a much better chance of evading her, especially if she has no idea where they're heading."
Gaius turned to Gwaine and Marian, looking uncomfortable.
Gwaine's brow furrowed as he realized Gaius had something to say that he really didn't want to. "What is it, Gaius?"
"Eira is working for Morgana, I'm afraid."
"How? How does she even have this information?" Marian asked.
"She and Sir Brian have been… close." Gaius's eyebrow arched as he gave them a look that said, you know what I mean, please don't make me say it.
"And you think Brian is sharing information with this woman?" Gwen asked.
Gwaine fidgeted uncomfortably since he was the one whoinsisted Eira return with them. She was his responsibility, yet he allowed Brian to take care of her instead. If only he'd done his duty, then this wouldn't have happened. And now Brian may be painted as a traitor. "He would never do that," Gwaine said. "He's as loyal to Camelot as anyone."
Gaius shook his head. "I think he's providing her with information about our movements, though unwittingly, I'm sure."
"Well, it's plausible. She's certainly charming," Marian said.
"What do you mean by that?" Gwaine asked, frowning at her.
"Well, she had you fooled. I'm not surprised Brian fell for her, too. I'm sure anyone would've given the chance."
Gwaine looked away, controlling his temper. "Anyone? You mean me?"
"You did seem keen on her when she first got here."
"Keen? What the hell does that mean? That I fancied her?"
Marian glared at him.
"No, I did not. Just because I gave aid to a pretty wo—"
"Enough!" Gaius shouted. "We must turn our attention to Brian and Eira."
"Alright. How would he have any information to pass on?" Gwaine asked.
"Gwaine, he passed us in the corridor the other day. I asked you to help Merlin, remember? Brian could have accidentally let it slip. And surely he was present for the battle plans. He could have said something to her to comfort her."
Gwaine shook his head. "Brian isn't that easily tricked."
"I'm not saying he's at fault, Gwaine, but love or… infatuation can make people do strange things… foolish things."
"Is that what you think? Really?"
Marian blinked in confusion and with more than a sneaking suspicion that Gwaine wasn't talking about Brian anymore. "Yes, really."
"And you think him a fool for falling in love?" Gwaine's mouth set in a thin line.
"I never said—"
"Stop!" Gwen held her hand up. "This is easily resolved. We must tell Brian she's a traitor. To prove it, he will need to tell Eira that Arthur is alive and is headed in the opposite direction. To Brineved. Then we will watch her to see if she sends a message to Morgana."
Gaius nodded. "It's settled."
Marian grabbed Gwaine's arm when the others walked away. "What was all that about?"
He tore from her grasp. "I don't know what you mean," he said, his voice clipped.
"You know exactly what I mean, Gwaine."
"If you'll excuse me, this lovesick fool has to go find Brian and break his heart." He stormed off, leaving Marian alone in the corridor.
She leaned back against the wall and looked up, sighing. Nope. Love could very well be her undoing. Fuck love.
That night, Marian and Gaius stayed up late in the physician's chambers, trying to find a potion to heal Arthur's wound. But if Merlin's magic couldn't halt the sword shard from reaching the king's heart, what good would a potion do? Of course, it wasn't that simple. Nothing in Camelot ever was.
"Gaius, this isn't working!" Marian cried as she slammed her book down. "None of these potions will reverse the magic that's killing him."
"We must keep searching, Marian. The king must live. Whatever enchantment Morgana used on Mordred's sword is strong, I'm afraid."
"And if there isn't anything that will help?"
Suddenly, the door burst open, and Elyan ran in. "It's done. You were right, Gaius. Eira is the traitor."
"How is Brian taking it?" Gaius asked.
"Not well. He punched Gwaine when he told him about her treachery. And now that he knows it's true, he's beyond consoling."
"Brian isn't under suspicion, is he?" Marian asked.
"Not anymore. But Eira's to be hanged at dawn."
"Oh god. Poor Brian."
"It is indeed regrettable, but at least we know that Arthur and Merlin will be safe for now," Gaius said.
"Yes," Marian agreed, looking out of the window at the moon. Morgana would be far away from Arthur, but would that mean he'd get to Avalon and the Sidhe in time? And if Morgana got wind of Merlin and Arthur's true plans… "For how long, though?" She turned to Elyan and Gaius. "How far is Avalon from here?"
"Maybe a hard day's ride. Why?" Elyan asked. His eyes widened, and he shook his head when he realized what she wanted to do. "No. Surely, you aren't going after the king?"
"Remember the Dark Tower?"
"I do. And you nearly died because of me."
Marian sighed. "I know. But you know this has to happen, right?"
"Absolutely not," Gaius said. "You will not use your magic, Marian. That will kill you."
"I have to, Gaius. It's the only way, and you know it. Arthur's life is more important than anything."
Gaius placed his hands on her shoulders and looked her in the eyes. "Marian, you are a daughter to me. I will not have you sacrifice yourself."
Marian gave him a soft smile. "And you are a father to me, Gaius. But you have to understand, this is why I'm here. This is my purpose. Why else would Fate give me magic? And not just any magic, either. Healing magic. This is what I'm here for. The prophecy said it, remember? The Wanderer will walk and heal the slain. What else could that mean?"
"I'm not going to change your mind, am I?"
After Marian shook her head, Gaius pulled her into a fatherly hug.
When they parted, she turned to Elyan. "Thank you for keeping my secret, Elyan. Please, don't tell anyone about my magic, especially not Gwaine. Not yet. He'll arrest me."
Elyan frowned. "Marian, you know that's not true."
"It is. He's made it perfectly clear on more than one occasion that all sorcerers are enemies of Camelot. Besides, it'll hurt him that I never told him."
"Well, you can't go tonight. There are Saxons everywhere. You'd be caught for sure."
"I'll leave at dawn then."
She stuck her hand out, waiting for him to agree.
Elyan sighed and grasped her arm. "You have my word."
Marian walked the corridors, trying to find Gwaine. Despite their recent unfriendliness, she couldn't die without at least saying goodbye. There was no way she'd be easy with her sacrifice, with the last words between them being out of anger. What she should have done was to be honest with him, but she was a coward in matters of her heart. Especially with him.
She found Gwaine and Percival as they were standing at one of the windows, watching as guards led Eira up to the gallows. The crowd was loud and unforgiving, shouting slurs and curses at her. Marian stopped to watch the execution. Could she witness the hanging of someone who had cost the lives of hundreds? She was about to find out.
With a push of the lever, the floor dropped out from under Eira. Marian gasped and bile began to make its way up her throat when she saw the body bounce and Eira's neck break. Never again would she watch a hanging.
Gwaine and Percival turned to her when they heard her gasp. "Did you come here to gloat?" Gwaine asked, ignoring her revulsion.
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me. It's my fault the traitor is in Camelot. It's my fault she gave Morgana information about our plans," he said as he turned back to the window.
"Is that what you really think about me? I can't help but wonder if you've ever really known me."
Gwaine shrugged. "I did. I thought I did, anyway. These last months have said otherwise."
"And what about after Camlann? What about that kiss?"
Percival raised his eyebrows, while Gwaine fumed, trying his best to not say anything he'd regret.
"What about it?"
"Didn't it mean anything?"
Of course, it meant something. It meant everything, but he couldn't bring himself to tell her the truth. If he did, the hurt would be unbearable. So, he lied. "It happened in the heat of the moment. So, no."
Marian looked like she'd been slapped. "I didn't come here to argue with you. But of course, you want to lash out, making it impossible to say goodbye. Fuck you, Gwaine."
He turned back to her and looked her up and down, his nostrils flaring at her riding tunic and trousers. "You're serious? You're leaving Camelot then?" he asked flatly.
She crossed her arms and nodded, daring him to say something about it.
"As soon as it gets hard, you leave. I can't keep rescuing you from trouble when you walk back into it willingly. I'm done chasing you."
"I've never asked you to, Gwaine. And this is important—"
"So long, sweetheart."
Marian looked between Gwaine and Percival, the latter with a look of confusion and concern on his face. Percival took a breath, ready to talk some sense into them, but never got the chance.
"I can't believe this! This is just like you, Gwaine! I'm trying to make amends, and you just make snide remarks!"
"Why would you want to make amends? You seem perfectly happy with the way things are."
Marian threw her hands in the air, giving up completely. "I should've known. Why would I even try? I just wanted to ride to my death without a completely broken heart, but I guess that's not going to be possible!" She started to leave when she felt him grab her arm.
Gwaine panicked and roughly spun her around, taken aback at her revelation. Surely he hadn't heard her correctly. "Wait, Marian, ride to your—"
"My death, yes. I wanted to at least be forgiven by the only man that I have ever actually loved, but instead, you accuse me of being the kind of person who only cares if they're right, and not about the lives affected!"
Percival put a hand on each of their shoulders. "Will you both listen to yourselves? There's no need for anyone to die. Gwaine, tell her. Tell her how you really feel."
Gwaine looked at her for a moment, collecting his thoughts. Fearful and wide-eyed, he opened his mouth to tell her not to go, but the words were stuck. The revelation that she was willingly going to die was too much for him.
But what little hope she'd had of any sort of reconciliation was squashed with his silence. "Guess what, Gwaine, your heart isn't the only one that's broken beyond repair. I've not only lost the man I love but my best friend as well!"
That shook him out of his stupor. "But Gwen is—"
"Not Gwen, you idiot! You! I wish to god I'd never come to Camelot! Damn Camelot! Damn Morgana! And damn you!"
He grabbed her arm and pulled her closer. "You're not going."
"You're not going to stop me. What I have to do is bigger than me and bigger than you."
"You aren't going to ride to your death because I'm not going to let you go, Marian. I won't let you give up your life!"
She reared back and sucker-punched Gwaine. He dropped her arm and fell on his ass, seeing stars. She'd hit him. He taught her how to defend herself, and it worked. It fucking worked.
She turned to Percival and pointed at Gwaine. "You keep him away from me, Percival!" She stormed off before Gwaine could pull his senses together.
Percival stood there in shock. For one, Marian could knock Gwaine to the floor, a feat many couldn't accomplish. And two, she was truly going to go off and die. He didn't stop her. He couldn't stop her, but he trusted that whatever it was she was going to do needed to be done for the good of Camelot.
Gwaine stood and screamed as his rage grew. He took off for the stairs but turned around when Percival didn't follow. "Come on, Percival. We have to go after her!"
"No, Gwaine. We can't."
"The hell we can't!"
Percival laid a hand on Gwaine's shoulder. "Whatever it is she's doing has to be done. She'll find another way if we try to stop her."
"But she's going to die! I can't—"
"She's made her decision. We have to trust she knows what she's doing."
Gwaine kicked the wall and then deflated.
Morgana had killed thousands, tortured them, made Gwaine torture Marian, and started a war. The witch was responsible for so much strife and now their king was dying and the woman he loved was walking away from not only his life but hers as well.
"You know what you said you'd do if you ever found Morgana?" he asked Percival.
"Yeah."
"Well, we've got a good idea where she'll be heading."
Marian was in the stables, readying her horse for her journey when she heard heavy footsteps. She darted behind a pillar and watched Gwaine and Percival enter the stalls next to her. Sighing, she frowned, irritated that they intended to follow her.
The horses whinnied as the saddles were strapped on their backs.
"If we hurry, we can catch Morgana before she figures out the king isn't in Brineved," Gwaine said.
"You know this is suicide, don't you?" Percival asked.
Gwaine laughed bitterly. "You can stay if you want, but I have nothing to lose anymore."
Marian peered around the pillar and saw Percival place a heavy hand on Gwaine's shoulder.
"Then it's time we give Morgana what she deserves. Let's put an end to this once and for all," Percival said.
They mounted their horses and rode off.
Marian rushed to finish preparing her horse and jumped into the saddle. "Damn!" They weren't going to stop her from going after Arthur. Instead, they're going to get themselves killed. Fearful that her nightmares were once again coming true, Marian sped off to follow Gwaine and Percival. She couldn't let Gwaine die. Arthur, she prayed, could wait just a little longer.
Gwaine awoke, kneeling on the ground with his arms tied between two trees. The Lady Morgana stood before him, an evil smile plastered on her face as she held up a small wooden box in front of her.
"Tell me where the king is."
He laughed. Did she truly think that would work? "I'd rather die."
And he meant it. He had nothing else to live for. The only person he ever loved was on her way to her death—if not dead already— and the only things left for him in Camelot were bitter memories. He could never go back to his old ways of gambling and drinking his way across the kingdoms. Marian had made sure of that. She changed him, giving him a reason for being, a purpose. He was noble and loyal to his king, and there was no way he would betray Arthur.
"Then you shall have your wish… once you've told me," Morgana grinned. "Not even you, Sir Knight, can resist the charms of the nathair."
Gwaine smirked. "We'll just have to see about that."
"Oh, don't worry. It won't be a quick death. I'll draw this out as long as needed because after you tell me where Arthur is, you'll get to watch your Lady Fair die by my hands."
His smirk faltered. He looked around, hoping she hadn't somehow captured Marian. "I don't see anyone else here, Morgana."
"Marian will be along shortly. She'll not be able to resist healing her knight in shining armor." She laughed at his confused look. "Oh, do you not know? She has magic, Gwaine. And to think this whole time, she's been keeping it a secret from you. Tsk, tsk." Morgana opened the wooden box, and the nathair slithered up to her hand. At his stricken face, she leaned in close to his ear. "Yes, I'm sure it was true love, then."
"Marian doesn't even know where I am, Morgana," he said, unsure his words were true. He squirmed as she held the nathair out toward him. "You've failed."
"Have I? I think not," she laughed as the nathair slithered up to Gwaine's neck. "My spies have seen her riding this way, Gwaine. And when she gets here…" The nathair bit his neck, and he screamed. "I will finally spill her blood as you watch!"
Tears spilled from his eyes as the nathair milked every ounce of pain from him. The white-hot sting of the bite was enough to bring him to the point of blacking out, but that was nothing compared to knowing that he would be the cause of Marian's death. It was too much to bear.
Marian followed Gwaine and Percival's tracks as carefully as she could, guessing that she was only about twenty minutes behind them. She already knew the way to Brineved thanks to traveling to the apothecary that lived there. She slowed her horse as screams of pain rang out across the forest.
"Oh god!"
Gwaine and Percival found Morgana by the sounds of it, and it didn't sound as if things had gone well. Her heart ached when she heard a second scream. It was Gwaine. Her Gwaine. And he was being tortured.
Marian quickly spurred her horse onward.
"AVALON!" Gwaine screamed. The pain had been too much. He could endure no more. "Arthur's gone to Avalon."
This was worse than Morgana had feared. Not only was Avalon in the opposite direction, but it meant only one thing—Arthur intended to ask the Sidhe to heal him. It also meant there was no more time for games. She carefully placed the nathair in its box and rose. She would need to hurry if she were to catch up to him.
"We'll have to forgo Marian's torture, I'm afraid. Arriving to find her lover's dead body will have to do." Morgana leaned close to his ear. "But don't worry, Sir Knight, I'll come after your Lady Fair once I've killed your king." Morgana whistled for her horse, and upon its arrival, she mounted the steed and took off at a lightning pace.
Gwaine's head dropped as he let out the ragged breath he'd been holding. He had betrayed his king, after all. Ashamed, all he could hope for now was that Marian never found his body.
Marian heard a horse charging on the path toward her and hurried into the safety of the trees. She sat there undetected as Morgana raced past her, and when she no longer saw the witch, she went back up to the path and kicked her horse up to speed.
Finally reaching the small clearing, she gasped when she saw Gwaine tied between two trees. It was the nightmare that terrorized her for years, and it was up to her to save his life. She no longer gave a damn about Arthur or Camelot. The only ache in her heart was for Gwaine and she'd save him, even if it killed her.
She sprinted to him and slid to the ground in front of him. He was limp but conscious, his breathing shallow as he looked at her with heavy-lidded eyes.
"Marian…" he gasped for air. "She's riding to Avalon…"
She held his face in her hands and lifted his head. "Gwaine, save your strength."
"Too… late… I've failed… I'm sorry…" he whispered. I love you.
"No, no, no, no! You're not leaving me! You're not!" Tears rolled down her cheeks as her chin trembled. She tenderly kissed his lips, and then rested her brow against his, drawing out the ancient healing words from deep inside her heart. "Buthed gwared. Hrag pob ailed. Hrag pob evnis. Boyd un thilis."
Gwaine's skin warmed at her touch, and light began to pour from her body. "Ic þe þurhhæle þin licsare mid þam sundorcræftas þære ealdaþ æ!"
The golden light was full of love and outshined even the sun. Marian leaned forward and kissed him, her lips the conduit for her life force. She felt his body getting stronger, while hers grew weaker until the unimaginable pain of the nathair hit. She tried to concentrate on healing him, ignoring the agonizing sting that coursed through her body, through her soul.
Percival came through the forest, holding his hand to shield his eyes from the light. "Gwaine? Marian?"
Gwaine leaned forward when Marian released his lips and raised her head toward the sky, screaming in pain. In a flash, the light was gone, and she fell to the ground, unconscious. He and Percival watched in confusion as the bruises on Marian's face slowly faded.
Pulling against his restraints, Gwaine started to panic. "Marian!" Desperate to get to her, he uselessly pulled against the rope. "Get me out of this, Percival!"
Percival knelt down to check her pulse first.
Gwaine swallowed hard. "Is she…?"
"She's alive," Percival replied before untying Gwaine. "What happened?"
Gwaine fell to the ground and leaned over Marian, brushing the hair from her face. "Magic. God, Percival, Marian has magic."
She gradually opened her eyes and groaned. Grabbing her head, she winced in pain that was so great that she saw stars.
"Careful," Gwaine said as he helped her to sit up.
Marian refused to look at him, afraid of seeing the disgust on his face. He'd said it before. He had a duty to Camelot, and that meant ridding the kingdom of magic… of her.
"Marian?" Gwaine asked, stooping to see her face.
"Don't hate me, Gwaine. My heart can't take anymore," she begged, her voice small and vulnerable.
He shook his head, trying to take it all in. He felt both elated and betrayed all at once. It hurt that she'd not said one word about her magic, that it had been their worst enemy that had told him. Morgana knew before he did. But he didn't hate Marian. He never could. "I meant what I said when I told you I can never hate you, sweetheart."
"Even though I have magic? And… and you said that all magic was evil?"
His heart broke when he remembered how he'd spoken of magic during their arguments. It was no wonder Marian felt that she couldn't confide in him. "I spoke without thinking," he said as he hooked his finger under her chin to lift her face to him. "I will never hate you, my love, and I will always die to protect you, magic or no."
Not completely recovered from saving Gwaine, she started to stand but fell back down. As much as she'd love to sit there and explain everything to him, she had a mission to complete. Her duty. Her destiny. She had to save King Arthur of legend.
"Would you help me up? I'm still weak, and we need to find Arthur and Merlin."
Percival finally found his voice. "We can head to Camelot after you've had some rest."
Gwaine shook his head in shame. "I told Morgana where Merlin was taking Arthur. The nathair… it was too powerful."
Percival laid his hand on his shoulder. "It's alright, Gwaine. No one could've withstood it."
Gwaine nodded. "Right. You and I should go to Avalon, and Marian can stay here to rest."
"Don't I get a say?" Marian asked, irritated that they were talking about her as if she wasn't there.
"You can't even stand, Marian. How—"
"Give me a minute and I will."
Gwaine didn't understand why she wanted to get to Arthur so desperately until he remembered what she said earlier that day, and he frowned. "This is what you had intended to do, wasn't it? Riding to your death meant healing Arthur? But instead, you followed me?"
Marian nodded but said nothing.
"And if you heal Arthur, you'll die?"
"It's likely," she replied, her voice growing in strength, but her eyes—wide with fear—gave her away. "Don't try to stop me, Gwaine. It's my destiny to save the king."
"Please don't, Marian. Don't leave me."
"I have to save Arthur."
"But you can't give up your life."
Marian sighed. "You swore on your life to protect Camelot and her king, didn't you? You're prepared to die for it?"
He nodded.
"As am I."
"This is different, love."
"How? How can it be different?"
"You're precious and kind, and you deserve to live a long life. I don't care if it means the kingdom. I'd give up everything and everyone for you."
She closed her eyes for a brief moment. "If you could do it right now… if at this very moment, one action by you could save a kingdom… would you do it knowing you may not live?"
He stayed silent.
"You do that every damn time you go on a mission or a quest. Let me do this one thing for our kingdom, Gwaine. Let me protect you for once."
He stood and took her hand, pulling her up. Wrapping her in his arms, he nuzzled her head, his face in her hair, and held her tight.
"But how can I let you go to your death?"
"You have to let me go. As much as it breaks my heart to leave you, I have to at least try to save Arthur."
He placed his brow on hers. "Damn Arthur and damn Camelot for taking you away from me."
"I know, my darling knight, but none of us have a choice. There's so much I want to say. So much more I need to tell you, but we don't have time."
"Marian, I love you."
She closed her eyes, pushing out tears from beneath her lashes. Taking a breath to collect herself, she smiled at Gwaine, her heart full of love. "If I survive, I'll tell you everything after this is over. I promise."
When he opened his mouth to protest, she placed her fingers to his lips.
"I will do everything in my power to live, Gwaine. For you."
He marveled at the woman before him. Though she looked scared as hell, she was still going to go through with it. Finally, he had no doubts that Marian Ragnell would save the King of Camelot. He failed to protect Arthur, but he'd be damned before he failed Marian too.
"Well then, we need to get there as quick as we can," he said, resigned to their fate.
It took several hours to get close to Avalon, darkness pursued them like a predator after its prey. The journey wore Marian out to near exhaustion. Saving a life always took more out of her than just healing an injury, and she hadn't felt this weak since she saved Elyan at the Dark Tower.
Percival stopped, motioning for them to follow suit. "There's someone just over there," he whispered, pointing to a small clearing. Adrenaline rushed through his veins as he approached and his eyes widened when he recognized Morgana lying on the ground before him, still as death itself, eyes glassy and unseeing. Death was always difficult to reconcile, but Percival didn't find it hard to be pleased the witch was dead. He crouched down next to her and felt her neck for a pulse. Her skin was as cold as ice. Definitely dead. "It's Morgana. She's dead."
Marian closed her eyes as tears rolled down her cheeks and she whispered. "It's over."
Confused by her tears, Gwaine looked over at her. "Marian?"
When she met his gaze, she smiled as she laughed. "It's over, Gwaine. There's only Arthur left to save. It's over."
Gwaine knitted his brow, unsure of how to feel about Morgana's death. He believed she deserved more—to receive the same treatment she had given, to be tortured as she had done to others, to be utterly destroyed, not to meet such a pathetic end. But, like Marian said, it's over. Vowing to make Marian's fairy tale ending a reality, he grinned at her. "Then let's get to it. You have a king to save, beautiful."
They left the witch out in the open, allowing nature's beasts to rid the earth of her body. Riding into the night, they finally reached a clearing in the forest where Merlin was sitting on the ground, cradling the king. Marian dismounted with such speed that she nearly fell, and gathering what little strength she had left, she hurried to them.
Merlin panicked when she fell to the ground and placed her hands on Arthur's chest. "No, Marian, it will kill you!"
She was remarkably calm and her voice soothing. "Merlin, Arthur is dying. Let me try."
By the time Gwaine and Percival made it over to them, her healing light grew, bathing all around her in warmth. Gwaine watched her in awe as his beautiful Marian did what she did best—caring for others. How could he ever think that her magic could be anything but good? He had seen his fair share of sorcery, but never anything like this.
It was taking considerably more effort to heal the king. Marian could feel her energy being sucked from her body, making her weak, but she didn't feel Arthur's strength growing. Instead, she felt death. Worried that she was failing, she looked at Merlin, pleading for his help. He nodded, and, placing his hands on Arthur's chest, they chanted the spell together.
"Buthed gwared. Hrag pob ailed. Hrag pob evnis. Boyd un thilis. Ic þe þurhhæle þin licsare mid þam sundorcræftas þære ealdaþ æ!"
The glow of light grew as brighter than ten suns before it flashed into nothing. A small piece of a sword's blade sat on Arthur's chest, having been drawn from his body like poison from a wound.
Marian cried out in pain and doubled over onto the ground, holding her hand to her bloody chest. Gwaine rushed to her side, sliding on the grass, and pulled her into his arms. "Oh, god! She's bleeding out! I need something to stop it!"
"Gwaine," Merlin said.
"Merlin, give me your kerchief!"
"Gwaine."
"Hurry!"
"Gwaine, stop."
He lifted her tunic. There was no wound. It made little sense. He saw the blood, saw it spreading across her chest. "I don't—"
"It's her magic."
"Her magic?"
Merlin nodded. "I'll explain later."
Gwaine looked back down at Marian as her eyes opened.
"I'm sorry," she whispered as she ran her hand over his cheek.
Her touch was so light that he almost didn't feel it. He cradled her head in his hands, his thumbs stroking her cheeks. "For what? You did it, love. You saved the king."
Marian's voice was weak. "I'm sorry for leaving you."
"Please, Marian. Don't go." Gwaine drew a shuddering breath as his tears followed the path down to the tip of his nose and fell. "Don't leave me, sweetheart. You promised, remember?" He shook with anguish, willing her to live, and stroked her face, her hair, anything to keep her conscious. "Remember that, Marian? You promised to tell me everything. You can't break a promise, beautiful. You can't. You have to live. You promised you'd live."
"My darling knight." She closed her eyes, and her body went limp.
"Marian?" He shifted, pulling her closer. "Marian, love, say something."
Percival drew closer and knelt beside them, and reaching over to Marian's neck, he felt a slow, weakening pulse. "She's alive, Gwaine. But only just."
"Wake up, sweetheart," Gwaine begged. "Wake up! I need you!" He pulled her up and laid her head on his shoulder, rocking her in his arms, his tormented cries echoing across the clearing. "Oh, god, no! No!"
Arthur woke at Gwaine's cries and sat up. "Merlin, what's happened?" he asked, watching as his bravest knight melted into agony.
Gwaine shouted in anger and despair. "Help her, dammit!"
Percival laid his hand on Gwaine's shoulder.
"Gwaine…"
"Please," Gwaine pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper. He looked over at Percival. "Please, Percival."
Merlin left the king to be with Gwaine. "She's still alive."
"Then why won't she wake?"
"I don't know. She usually wakes up soon after the spell." He closed his eyes to concentrate and held his hands over Marian's head, softly muttering a healing spell. "Purhhaele dolgbenn."
Nothing happened.
Merlin tried again, and again nothing happened. "We need to get her to Gaius."
Gwaine looked down at Marian and remembered the last time he thought she was dying. He'd held her close, sobbing into her hair, begging her to live, telling her he loved her. It struck him that she had used her magic then, too. She'd saved Elyan. Perhaps, then, there was hope.
"Merlin? The Dark Tower?" he asked, praying that he was right and that Marian had a chance.
"Yes."
"Then she'll live?"
"I don't know. The sword that Mordred used on Arthur was more powerful than the one that wounded Elyan. Marian's magic is… peculiar."
Arthur went to Gwaine's side and watched as he rocked Marian. He saw Gwaine's proud heart breaking out in the open for all to see, and he felt immense sorrow. Marian was a loyal subject, and a good friend—no, better than good. She was family. Family who'd risked everything to heal him. "Marian healed me with magic."
Merlin nodded.
"And she's now dying because she healed me?"
Merlin nodded again, unable to say it.
"Can't you heal her with your… your magic? Or something?"
Merlin looked at him thoughtfully. "No, I can't. There may be another way, but you're not going to like it."
Gwaine took a breath so he could get the words out. "Please, Merlin. I can't lose her. Not again."
Arthur nodded, agreeing. "She saved my life. Do it."
Merlin lifted his head to the sky, his blood flowing hot and his skin tingling with magic. Reaching deep inside, he pulled the ancient language of the dragons from his core, and his voice rumbled through the air like thunder.
"O drakon! E male so ftengometta tesd'hup'anankes!"
After only a minute or so, a distant roar rang out across the sky. A dragon swooped down and landed in the clearing.
Arthur stumbled back in shock. There it was—there he was—the Great Dragon he thought he'd vanquished many years ago, alive and… and just standing there, not attacking. "Merlin?"
"It's alright, Arthur. Kilgharrah is a friend. And an ally."
"Arthur Pendragon," Kilgharrah's voice boomed. "It is an honor to finally meet The Once and Future King."
The dragon bent low, bowing to Arthur.
"Great Dragon—"
Merlin leaned over and spoke into Arthur's ear. "Kilgharrah."
"Kilgharrah." Though he'd never admit to it, Arthur was nervous—why shouldn't he be? The dragon had nearly killed half of the city—and yet something told the king to trust the creature. He didn't know if it was Merlin or his gut, but he needed to be the king he was meant to be, not a little boy scared of his own shadow. He was the King of Camelot and it was time he started acting like it. As he breathed in, an air of royalty washed over him and he bowed to the dragon. "The honor is mine."
"What is it that I can do for the King of Camelot?"
"Our healer is dying, and Merlin believes you may be of some help."
"The dragonlord was right to summon me, as I may yet be able to help the witch."
"I've tried to heal her on my own," Merlin said. "But it won't work. Arthur was nearly slain by an immortal blade—"
"And she took his wound?" Kilgharrah asked. "I warned her that this might happen."
No longer able to keep silent, Gwaine's jaw clenched as he drew in a breath to speak. "Marian believed that the life of our king was worth sacrificing her own," he bit out angrily.
"Indeed, Marian Ragnell is of a noble heart. Bring her closer," Kilgharrah replied.
Gwaine stood, lifting her into his arms, and brought her to the dragon.
Kilgharrah bent low to examine her and closed his eyes as he reached out with his magic. He could feel her pain and her distress, but also resignation. It was her fate to die for Camelot. She'd always known that. But there was something else there, amongst the resignation—a small spark of hope and love.
Kilgharrah smiled.
Love. There was no magic more powerful.
When he opened his eyes, Kilgharrah blew a soft, warm breath over Marian, giving her a small part of his life force. "I have done everything in my power to save her. I can do no more. The rest is up to the Wanderer."
"Will her magic not heal her, then?" Merlin asked.
"The witch's magic is great indeed, but it is not of this world, Merlin. What is done cannot be undone. Her fate is no longer tied to the Once and Future King."
Beyond angry, and quite a bit frightened, Gwaine yelled at the dragon. "Can't you just tell us what to do instead of speaking in damned riddles?"
"Calm yourself, young rogue," Kilgharrah said calmly, pity lacing his words. "Your heart is ill, but your love is strong. It does you both credit. If the witch is to heal, she must do it on her own time. My magic is of no use to a wanderer such as she."
"What does that even mean?" Gwaine asked, his voice cracking.
"It means that you, young rogue, must give her a reason to live. It is your destiny, son of Sir Lot of Lothian."
Arthur looked over at Gwaine in shock. Sir Lot of Lothian was one of the most famous and heroic knights in all the five kingdoms. And apparently Gwaine's father.
"There is nothing more either of us can do, then?" Merlin asked.
"I am sorry, old friend, but her fate rests with her heart," Kilgharrah said.
Gwaine collapsed onto the ground, still clinging to Marian's limp body. He couldn't lose her. Marian was the only person he'd ever loved. She held his heart—if she died, he would die right along with her.
"My time on this Earth is nearly over," Kilgharrah said, "though it gladdens my heart to see it left in capable hands. It has been a privilege to have known you, young warlock. The story we have been a part of will live long in the minds of men."
"Thank you, old friend."
The Great Dragon took off with a flourish and left as quickly as he had arrived.
"Dragonlord?" Arthur asked, his eyebrow arching high on his forehead.
Merlin shrugged and walked away. "I'll get the horses."
"Gwaine?" Percival knelt next to him. "We have to go." He looked up at Arthur when Gwaine didn't respond.
Arthur crouched on Gwaine's other side and laid his hand on his shoulder.
"Gwaine."
He looked over at his king, his eyes red from his tears.
"It's time to go now. Let's go save the life of our healer."
Percival reached over and took Marian from Gwaine's arms as he stood. Before they reached the horses, Gwaine took his armor and chainmail off and dropped them to the ground with a thud, left to be forgotten. He climbed onto his saddle and untied his padded undershirt. "Hand her to me, Perce."
Percival helped get Marian settled in Gwaine's lap. Gwaine pulled her close to his chest and wrapped her in his undershirt as best he could. "I'll get you home, beautiful. You'll be alright. I promise."
Merlin sat on the back of Arthur's horse, and as they passed Gwaine, he muttered in the ancient tongue.
"What was that?" Arthur asked.
"A warming spell."
"All this time, my manservant was a damn sorcerer," Arthur grumbled as he shook his head. "Could've used that spell in Ismere." He took the reins and clicked his tongue. "Hyah!"
When they arrived back in Camelot, Gwen met them in the courtyard. Gwaine carried Marian to the steps leading to the physician's chambers, while Gwen rushed into Arthur's arms, tears of happiness streaming down her face.
"We thought the worst had happened."
Arthur kissed her deeply and when he pulled back, he nodded toward Gwaine as he disappeared into the castle. "I would have been dead, if not for Marian."
Eyes widening, Gwen pulled back. "She used her magic to heal you?"
"And is nearly dying for the effort… Wait, you knew?"
"I did. I'm sorry for not telling you."
"And Merlin? Did you know about him, too?"
Gwen bit her lip but refused to look away. "I had my suspicions at the battle. It was all but confirmed by Gaius later."
"Gaius knew too?"
"Yes, but shouldn't we worry about Marian before you start the argument?"
Arthur smiled at her and shook his head. "I should just be glad we lived."
"We still don't know about Marian."
Arthur sobered quickly. "You're right." He looked around the courtyard for Merlin. "Where's Merlin got to now?"
"He's already gone to Gaius. As should we."
Marian slipped in and out of consciousness for what felt like days. Gwaine took her to her chamber and stayed to nurse her back to health. The magical wound deep inside of her took hold, and it was touch and go for a while, but Gaius believed her fever would soon break.
Gwaine slept on the floor by her bedside and his meals were brought to the chamber, though he ate very little. Even when others came in, he didn't leave. The pain inside her didn't ebb, and she knitted her brow in her sleep. Her skin was hot and sweaty, but she shivered from underneath several blankets. Gwaine stayed to wipe the sweat from her face and soothe her as she twitched during her fitful sleep.
"Do you remember when we first met? I had been injured protecting Arthur in a tavern brawl, and he and Merlin brought me to Camelot to heal."
He dipped the cloth back into a bowl of water and then wrung the excess liquid out to place it across her forehead.
"The next morning, I was getting dressed when this feisty blonde force of nature burst through the door and rightly called me an arrogant prick," he laughed. "I didn't know what I'd be in for, did I? Or how quickly I'd lose my heart to you."
He held her hand in his. "Please, wake up, beautiful." Placing his lips on hers, he gave her a quick but soft kiss. "I love you, Marian, with all of my heart." His tears rolled down his cheeks and fell, dampening her face before he tenderly wiped them away. "Please live, my love. For me."
Dreams also kept her company, usually making very little sense. A few times, Marian dreamt of Gwaine and the life she wished they could've had together. It had been a long time since she'd had one of her reoccurring dreams, but as it finally returned, she felt comfort in the familiar landscape of the same dream she'd had since childhood. Her body relaxed as she fell back into her favorite dream.
She was walking in a field, with the bright sun and the strong wind blowing. She wore a lavender dress with bell sleeves and embroidered flowers. As she walked through the field, the tips of her fingers lightly grazed the tops of the amber wheat. It was peaceful. It was silent.
As she heard a horse galloping toward her, Marian turned toward the sound, the breeze blowing errant strands of her hair into her face. She held her hand up to shade her eyes against the sun and watched as the horse and rider came nearer.
It was a beautiful horse, white with a long mane. In the saddle sat her knight in shining armor. His red cloak, adorned with a yellow dragon, drifted in the wind behind him. Tall, dark, and handsome, his dark brown hair whipped around his face. His beard was neatly trimmed, and his smile was wide and bright. His deep brown eyes sparkled at her.
"Hello, beautiful," he greeted with a slight Irish accent.
Marian gasped as she watched the knight—no, as she watched Gwaine dismount. He smiled brightly at her, moving closer and cupping her cheek.
"Is this the place?" he asked.
Marian nodded, unable to look away from his beautiful face.
Gwaine reached behind her and undid the ribbon that held her hair in its braid and ran his fingers through her golden locks until it flowed loosely in the wind. He brought the ribbon up to his lips and gently kissed it, and then took her hand in his, wrapping the ribbon around them both. He spoke to her, but she no longer heard his voice. Everything around her was becoming dim and faded into nothingness. She was waking…
Floating in the darkness between sleep and consciousness, she heard the muffled voices of her friends. She tried to open her eyes, wanting to tell them she was awake, but her body wouldn't cooperate. She felt the bed dip as Gwaine sat next to her and held her hand, and she couldn't do anything but lie there and listen.
"We've finished notifying the families of the fallen," Gwen said as Arthur walked into the room.
"Thank you, Guinevere. It couldn't have been easy," Arthur said.
She shook her head. "How are you feeling?"
"Like a fool. I couldn't even see magic right under my nose."
"You shouldn't, sire," Gaius said. "We took great pains to keep it a secret."
Merlin laughed. "It wasn't that hard, really. You can be pretty oblivious."
Arthur crossed his arms, frowning. "That's a discussion for another day. But I need to know, are there any more secret sorcerers I should know about?"
"Only Mordred."
Arthur closed his eyes and shook his head. Just as Merlin had said, oblivious. "So, Merlin has all magic, but Marian can only heal? I don't understand how that would work."
"Merlin's magic is natural," Gaius replied. "He was born with it. Marian's magic is an ancient gift very few, through history, have been blessed with. There have been some accounts of High Priestesses who were said to take on the burden of an injury or illness with a single spell. She could give them her life, sire."
"But she would be injured or fall ill in the process?" Arthur asked.
"Indeed. For instance, it would have felt as if Marian had been pierced by Mordred's blade when she healed you, or the bite by the nathair when she healed Gwaine."
"It sounds dangerous."
"It is very dangerous magic, but only to Marian. She risked her life to save you both." Gaius said as he fixed Arthur with a grave stare, willing him to understand the importance of her sacrifice.
Gwaine could no longer keep quiet. "Even after enduring the torment of my torture, she selflessly rode to you, knowing she would face your pain as well."
Arthur nodded. "She is truly heroic. I owe her my life and my kingdom."
Bringing her hand to his lips, Gwaine kissed it tenderly. "My Fierce Marian."
"So, she's done this before?" Arthur asked.
Merlin nodded. "Yes, she's healed before. You, Elyan, and Gwaine… you were all healed by her magic before now. She even healed me when we went to rescue King Rodor. We only discovered her talent by accident years ago when I had cut my arm, and she healed it without trying."
"Wait, when did she heal me before?" Gwaine asked. "Wouldn't I have remembered?"
Merlin grinned at him. "You were unconscious, I think. I wasn't there, but do you remember when you were injured by the Green Knight and were lying on your deathbed?" Gwaine nodded at him. "Didn't you wonder how you got well so quickly?"
Gwaine had wondered about that. When he woke up, he found Marian lying on the bed beside him, fast asleep. At the time, he believed that her presence had urged him to heal. In a certain sense, he was right. With a smile, he brushed the hair from her face.
"When did she have another chance to heal me?" Arthur asked.
"While looking for the Fisher King's trident. Morgana had given you an enchanted bracelet to drain your life force, and you fell and hit your head," Merlin said, enjoying the feeling of burdens lifting from his shoulders.
Arthur shook his head. "Elyan?"
Gwen spoke up. "At the Dark Tower."
"That's how you knew about it? Because she saved Elyan?"
"I'm sorry Arthur," Gwen said, biting her lip to contain a smile.
Gaius looked over at Marian fondly. "The effort of saving Elyan's life was almost too great. She swore to me that she'd never try it again. I guess she felt that this time the risk was worth it."
"If this gets out, she would be overwhelmed by people wanting her to fix them," Gwaine said.
Gaius shook his head. "No, she has to love the person, and hold them in her heart for the spell to take effect."
Arthur's eyebrows rose on his forehead. "Love? Surely she only loves Gwaine, not the rest of us."
"Yes, Arthur, love," Gaius replied. "There are many types of love one can feel. While she no doubt feels romantic love for Gwaine, she feels the love of friendship and family for others."
Gwaine's heart beat faster every time they mentioned her love for him. He hoped that now that he knew her secret, they'd be free to love one another. He hadn't felt such hope for a very long time.
"All this time, Camelot's had two guardians. With sorcery, no less," Arthur said as he shook his head. "My father must be rolling in his grave."
"About that…" Merlin grinned, eager to rub all the times he saved Arthur's ungrateful ass in his face. He should get about a week's entertainment out of that at least.
"My father knew?"
"Not exactly."
Arthur held his hand up. "No, I don't want to know." He arched an eyebrow at Gwaine. "Speaking of fathers… Son of Sir Lot of Lothian?"
Gwaine looked up at him and grinned. "Yes."
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"I didn't want to be treated differently."
"You do realize that it would have made a difference with my father, don't you?"
Gwaine shrugged. "He just wasn't the right king for me."
Arthur rolled his eyes but smiled. "Of course."
Gwen put her hand in the crook of Arthur's arm to lead him away. "Come, Arthur. We still have much to do."
"What else could we possibly have left? We've been at it for days." When he looked at Gwen, he tilted his head in confusion when she raised her eyebrows and smiled. "Oh. Oh!" Realization hit him and he smirked as they started to leave. "We do have much to do. A lot. Probably work throughout the night."
Merlin rolled his eyes. "I'd better go make sure they get their supper early. I definitely don't want to interrupt their alone time."
"Merlin, wait," Gwaine called out. He stood and went over to him, placing his hand on his shoulder. "I never got to thank you," he said, smiling at his friend.
Merlin tilted his head. "What for?"
"I realize now that a lot of our good luck through the years was down to you. You and your magic."
Merlin smiled shyly. He had never thought he would be thanked for just being himself. He never sought praise, but he rather liked it when it came from a friend. "My magic and your skill, Gwaine. You are the fiercest fighter I've ever seen."
"No, my friend. It was you and you alone. I've never met a braver or humbler man."
"I wouldn't be half the person I am without Gaius and Marian, though," Merlin chuckled.
They both looked over at her.
"What will you do now? When she wakes?" Merlin asked.
Gwaine sighed. "Love her for the rest of my life, if she'll have me."
"Good."
He turned back to Merlin, eyebrows raised.
Merlin laughed. "I don't think anything but Marian will make you happy. And you both deserve to be happy."
"As do you, my friend," he said, clapping Merlin on the back hard enough to make the warlock step forward.
Merlin shrugged. "Arthur's safe. Morgana's gone, and I don't have to hide anymore. I'm happy. Truly, I am." He smiled brightly and turned to go.
"Let me know when she wakes," Gaius said as he followed Merlin out of the room.
Alone, Gwaine sat on the bed next to Marian. He held her hand and was lost in thoughts of their past together. She captured his eye and his heart from the very beginning. Gwaine could no longer remember a time when she wasn't in his very soul.
He brought her hand to his lips and held it there as he placed feather kisses on her knuckles. Tenderly laying her hand back onto the bed, he stood to walk to the window and watch as the sun went down. He didn't hear when the maid came in to light the fire and the candles, and he didn't notice the supper that was laid out for him. But he heard the smallest change in the rhythm of Marian's breath.
Her eyelids fluttered and her eyes opened, focusing as she looked around the room. When she didn't immediately fall back asleep, he hurried to her and sat on the bed, smiling like crazy. "Hello, beautiful."
She caressed his cheek with the back of her fingers and whispered. "Gwaine," she said, as a small smile broke across her face. I love you.
He reached over and softly brushed her hair from her brow. "I'm here, beautiful. You're safe."
"And Arthur?"
"Alive and well, thanks to you."
Marian's eyebrows drew together.
"What's wrong, sweetheart?"
"Kiss me, so I know this is real."
Gwaine smirked at her. "Happy to oblige, my lady." His lips met hers in a soft and languid kiss. He smiled against her mouth when he felt her hand winding through his hair.
When they parted, Marian watched him with doe eyes. "My darling knight."
"My lovely healer."
Her eyes began to droop as she stifled a yawn.
"I'll go get Gaius and Merlin," he said as he bent down to kiss her brow, and he left the room.
When they came back to Marian's chamber, Gwaine leaned against the doorway, watching Gaius examine her. He'd never been so afraid as he was when he thought he'd lost her. And though staying by her side while she recovered was exhausting, he wouldn't have been anywhere else.
"She's out of danger now," Gaius said as he left the room. "She'll be tired for a while but she just needs rest and maybe a little comfort."
Gwaine released an anxious breath. "Thank you, Gaius, for everything."
Gaius looked him in the eye and spoke to him with a grave and serious tone. "She's like a daughter to me, Gwaine. If you hurt her, they will find pieces of you scattered throughout the five kingdoms."
Taken aback, Gwaine's eyes widened. "I—"
"There's a good man," Gaius said before clapping him hard on the shoulder.
Gwaine swallowed hard as he watched the elderly, and sometimes frightening, physician walk away.
Gwaine stayed in Marian's chamber for one more night. She was fine, Gaius had told him so, but he couldn't bring himself to leave her alone so soon. He told himself it was because he didn't want her to wake up confused, but in reality, Gwaine needed the comfort of seeing her peacefully sleeping and alive.
With the sun cresting over the horizon, he woke to go to his own chamber to start the day. Before he left, he tucked Marian's blanket around her and placed a soft kiss on her brow. When she cracked her eyes open, he smiled. "Get some more rest, sweetheart. I'll find you later."
She nodded sleepily and drifted back off to sleep. God, he loved that woman. Of course, he needed answers, like why she didn't tell him about her magic or why she pushed him away, but that could wait days or weeks if need be. The anger and hurt from the last few months didn't matter anymore. All Gwaine wanted to do was hold her for hours and hours, kissing her and telling her how much he loved her.
Like with all things you look forward to, the time until he could see her again crawled by. He attended the council meeting about the remaining Saxon forces. The nobles were blathering on about something he had no interest in and Leon was going on and on about something to do with Camlann.
"Do you have somewhere you need to be?" Arthur asked, annoyed at how Gwaine couldn't seem to sit still.
"No, sire. You have my complete attention." One of Gwaine's biggest lies. He had no idea what Arthur had said and to be honest, he didn't even give a shit.
Arthur chuckled. "We're done for the day. Go to her."
Gwaine shot up from his seat and bolted for the door.
"Gwaine?"
He turned to Arthur.
"For god's sake, tell her how you feel."
Gwaine grinned. "Yes, sire."
There was a bounce in his step as he headed to her chambers. They would reconcile and he'd spend the rest of his life showing her how much he loved her.
"Marian, are you decent?" he asked as he knocked on the door, grinning at the thought that she might not be. His face dropped when he didn't hear an answer. "Marian? You aren't still asleep, are you?" He opened the door to an empty room.
Frowning, he headed to the physician's chambers. Surely, she wasn't back at work already. Well, if she was, he was going to sneak her out. She had to rest, after all. "Where's Marian?" he asked when he entered the chambers.
"I'm not sure," Gaius replied. "My guess is her garden."
"Of course! Thank you, Gaius!" Gwaine sprinted from the room and out of the castle.
When he reached the garden, she was picking flowers with her skin glowing and the sunlight turning her hair to gold. He stopped to watch her, sighing at how lovely she looked when she bent to pick a flowering bud.
"Hello, beautiful."
Marian turned, a smile wide on her face. "Gwaine!" She leapt into his arms for the tightest hug he'd ever felt. "I'm so glad you found me."
When she pulled back, he plucked one of the purple blossoms from her hand and tucked it in her hair just over her ear. "As am I. How are you feeling?"
"Much better. I hope I never have to do that again."
"Don't worry, love, I'll make sure."
"Does that mean you're giving up your life of danger and will settle down on a farm?" she teased.
"Only if farmers are allowed to have such beautiful wives."
Marian's face fell. Though he knew her secret, she still couldn't give him the love he deserved. She never could, thanks to fucking Nimueh. "Gwaine—"
Knowing it was time to talk, he interrupted her. "Why didn't you tell me? You could have trusted me, sweetheart. I had to find out from Morgana, of all people."
Marian reached up to smooth the hair from his face. "I do trust you, Gwaine. But I didn't want you to split your loyalties. You're a Knight of Camelot. You would have felt obligated to…" She swallowed hard at the thought of being arrested by him. "I didn't want you to have to make that choice. I wanted to tell you. So many times, I thought I could. I thought that I would. But it was more than just my life at stake. Merlin's secret would have come out. And Arthur couldn't afford to banish Merlin. He still needs magic."
"I've told you before, beautiful, if it ever came between you and Camelot, I choose y—"
Marian quickly grabbed his head and pulled him to her lips, giving him a passionate kiss. She brushed her tongue over his lips and took the opportunity to deepen their kiss.
Gwaine smiled when they broke apart. "I will always choose you."
Marian held his face, her thumbs caressing him. "I'm so sorry, Gwaine. I'm ashamed of how I kept it from you."
As he covered her hands with his, she gasped at his intense look. Goddamn smolder.
"I thought I had no chance. I thought… I thought you'd never have me."
She shook her head. "That's not the reason I couldn't be with you."
"Couldn't? Does this mean you can now?"
"There's something I need to tell you, and it's so much worse than my magic."
Gwaine drew her to his arms and kissed her. When he leaned back to gauge her reaction, he was delighted to see her grin. "Sorry."
Marian chuckled. "No, you're not."
"No, I'm not. I figured that whatever you were going to tell me might end things, and I needed to kiss you one last time."
"Oh, Gwaine," Marian said as she laid her head against his chest. "I hope to god things won't end. But there's something I need to show you. Will you come up to my chamber with me?"
Gwaine nodded, and when she took a step, he brought her back to kiss her again. After they broke apart, she led him inside the castle and up the stairs toward her chamber. When she opened the door and invited him inside, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. She closed her eyes and let out a contented sigh, realizing that it wasn't just love for him that she felt, nor just desire. She felt safe.
"Before we say anything else, you need to know the whole truth. All of it."
"What can be so terrible that you're frightened to tell me?" he asked, unable to stop touching her.
She looked away, her heart beating hard. This was it, the moment she had feared for five long years. This was when Marian would be more honest with him than she'd ever been. He would either accept her truth or think her insane.
"Marian, there isn't anything that you can say that will change how I feel," he said softly as he bent his head down and placed soft kisses on her neck.
Sighing in pleasure at his attentions, she reluctantly let go of him and backed across the room. She opened the chest at the end of her bed and reached inside, carefully moving several items to get to the bottom. Curious, Gwaine peered over her to see inside. She lifted a piece of the false bottom and pulled out a rectangular piece of glass.
"Gwaine, I need to tell you something fantastic, something unbelievable. You are going to be skeptical and have questions, but I need you to let me finish. I need you to listen with an open mind. Will you do that for me?"
He nodded silently, waiting for her to continue.
"I'm not from Camelot, as you well know. My home is even further away than past the Great Seas." She paused, wary of how insane she was about to sound. "I'm from the future."
Gwaine looked at her as if she had grown a second head. That was certainly not what he had expected.
"I was born almost fifteen hundred years from now and was pulled back into history by a High Priestess, Nimueh. I… I fell through time." She paused to make sure he understood. When he said nothing, she continued, "I've been living here, in Camelot, for the last nine years or so, but I belong in the year two thousand and eighteen."
Gwaine looked like he was bordering between disbelief and amusement. He couldn't tell if she was lying to him or not. What she was saying sounded too absurd to be true.
"You, Arthur, Merlin…you're the heroes of ancient legend in my time. Storybook heroes I read about when I was a child. Heroes that I played make-believe with. If you knew how many times you saved me from dragons and evil wizards…" she trailed off, smiling. "Out of all the stories, you were my favorite knight. Sir Gwaine was my hero. You still are."
"You… you played… I saved you?"
"It was make-believe. My grandmother had a small wooden castle built for me. I would pretend to be the princess in a tower, the damsel in distress. And only Sir Gwaine could save me."
He rubbed his face in his hands. "I don't understand. I'm in books. In the future. Books in the future? You read about me when you were a child?"
"It sounds ridiculous, I know."
"It sounds insane! I would've been a child when you were and yet there were already stories about my life now, as an adult."
"Trust me, it was hard to believe when I first got here."
He frowned. "Wait, does that mean everything you've told me about your family… you lied? About your brother? And your parents?"
"No, I didn't lie to you. My brother really was killed on my birthday as we played on the road. My father really was cruel. I really did run away from my ex. I had no one left."
Gwaine turned around as he rubbed the back of his neck. "How am I supposed to believe this? It's… It's… I don't even know what this is."
Marian closed her eyes and sighed. "I didn't expect you to believe me at first. So I have proof. Proof that I'm from the future."
"What proof could there possibly be?"
"Do you not… are you… Gwaine, please just wait until I show you before you decide how you feel about me. Don't make a decision in anger."
"Someday, Marian, you'll understand that my love for you will never waiver. I'm just confused, not angry with you."
Marian nodded as she held her phone out for him to see.
"What's this?"
"This is called a phone. It's used to communicate over distances. I don't know if it will have enough power after all of these years, but I'm going to try to turn it on and show you that I'm not crazy and that I'm not lying."
She pressed the power button, but nothing happened.
"I—I don't understand, Marian. What power does a piece of glass have? Is it enchanted?"
"No, it…" she was at a loss for how to explain it to him. There were no common points of reference. "You know how a horse can pull a plow? The strength of the horse makes the plow move?"
He nodded. "Yes…"
"Well, in the future, we can… harness lightning instead of using horses. We capture it, and it makes things work."
Just then, her phone turned on, blinking with effort, and the familiar apple lit, then faded away as the screen came up.
"This can also… create pictures, not a drawing or a painting, and it reflects an image back to us, like a mirror, except that it's forever and never changes."
When Gwaine looked at her like she was crazy, she opened the camera app and set it to selfie. She stood beside him, holding her phone in front of them, and leaned in, kissing his cheek as she clicked the shutter button. She turned the device toward him and showed him the picture.
Gwaine took it and stared at his own face. It was as she said. There was an image of him, with a surprised look on his face as she kissed him. He had never even imagined anything like it could exist.
"Magic?" he whispered. "Is this a spell or a hallucination?
Shaking her head, she smiled at him. "Neither. It's called technology. It's common where I'm from."
She watched as he turned the phone in every direction. He brought it up close to his face and then held it out far. Gwaine smiled. He could look at this image for eternity.
Without warning, a soft tune played from the speaker before the screen went black.
"Sorry. That was my alarm. It's been so long that I'd forgotten about it."
"Alarm?" Gwaine asked, looking around. "Are there intruders? How can it know that?"
Laughing, she took the phone from him. "No, it was to wake me up in the mornings." It looked as if the phone had used the last of its battery power. She smiled wistfully at the loss of the last piece of her life from before. "The power is gone. It's dead."
Gwaine paced, trying to work through everything that she'd told him.
"Are you alright?" she asked as she bit her lip.
When he stopped and looked at her, his heart soared. "This changes nothing, my love," he said as he wrapped her in his arms. "I want to spend my life with you, loving you."
She backed out of his arms, looking at him with a nervous sort of sadness.
"Marian, what is it?"
"Nimueh didn't just pull me back in time," she said as her heart pounded in her chest. "She cast another spell, a cruel spell. If I ever fell in love and gave in to it, I'd be sent home, back to my time."
"I don't understand."
"I was able to avoid it for years until I met you. You worked your way into my heart, but I couldn't tell you how I feel. I could never be your sweetheart. We could never be in love or make love because I can't lose you, Gwaine. I can't go back to my future knowing that you were hurt, that I'd never even see you again."
Gwaine grabbed her shoulders and stooped down to her eyeline. "Isn't one moment of happiness worth it, though? Knowing that you loved and were in love with me… How would spending your life here make it any less painful for either of us?"
"You say that now, but… Do you remember when we first met, and you were banished? And you hurt me to push me away because it would be worse if we pined for each other? This is the same. If I resisted, you wouldn't get hurt."
"I can't live like that. I lo—"
"Don't say it. Don't say you love me."
"No, Marian. I love you and nothing will ever stop me."
She choked out a sob.
"Tell me, sweetheart. Say it. Say you love me too."
"Don't you see? This is why I can't!"
Gwaine placed his hands on either side of her face, his thumbs caressing her skin.
"Marian, tell me your heart." Every emotion he felt was written on his face as tears welled in his eyes. When he spoke again, his voice was barely above a whisper, pleading for her to bare her heart. "Tell me. Please."
It broke Marian to see him shed tears. "I do," she sobbed. "God, I do. I have for five years. If you could look at my heart, you'd see it full of you and only you, Gwaine."
He smiled through his tears. She'd finally said what he needed to hear, and he was joyous. No, more than joyous. His face showed all the love he had for her. And that was when Marian gave in.
Without warning, she felt a painful tug on her body. She drew a sharp breath and took a step back. It pulled at her again. What she'd dreaded ever since she met him had come to collect. Marian looked up at him, her face stricken with grief. "It's happening! Gwaine, it's pulling me!"
He rushed to her, and, grabbing her face, he kissed her. As soon as his lips touched hers, he too felt a sharp pull.
Instantly and completely, they were ripped from time.
Engulfed in darkness, knowing all and knowing nothing at once, Marian's head felt as if it split in two. She heard her voice, distant and soft, intertwined with Gwaine's, speaking things from the past as well as words that had not yet been spoken.
"Good morning, beautiful! Nice of you to join the living!"
"You are truly a good man. There weren't enough good men in my life before."
"Gentlemen. It seems whatever it is that you're after, you could use a little help."
"I couldn't leave you, Gwaine. I love you."
"Nobility is defined by what you do, and not by who you are."
"Oh, by the way, my name is Marian, and you, sir, are an arrogant prick!"
"Your chances looked between slim and none. I, er… I guess I just kind of liked the look of those odds."
"Of course, I don't like him, Arthur! He's rude and full of himself!"
"Hello, beautiful!"
"Sir Gwaine, meet your son."
"Marian, I've always loved you."
"I'm yours."
Their bodies were tossed around like rag dolls in the darkness. She couldn't see Gwaine, only knowing he was there by the sound of his voice. She needed to touch him, to make sure that she didn't imagine him there with her, so she reached out and brushed his hand with her own.
All of a sudden, there were bright and colorful lights blinding her. When she blinked the spots away, she was able to see Gwaine beside her. They had landed in a forest, panting, both on their hands and knees. Marian let out a blood-curdling scream of pain as Gwaine emptied the contents of his stomach onto the forest floor. They fell over and let the darkness consume them.
The blaring of a car horn woke Marian. She opened her eyes and saw an empty plastic soda bottle, crushed and mangled. "What the fuck?"
She quickly sat up and rubbed her temples. From behind her, she heard Gwaine moaning as he awoke.
Gwaine… Gwaine!
He was there with her, in her time, in the future. Marian had thought they would be parted forever, but instead, he unknowingly threw himself into the path of the spell.
She got on her knees and crawled over to him as he sat up. She launched herself into his lap and wrapped her arms around him, holding him tight.
"Marian?"
Her voice was muffled when she buried her face into his neck. "I thought I'd never see you again. But you came with me." When she lifted her head to look at him, tears streamed down her face. "God, Gwaine. You're here. You're here with me. I didn't lose you."
"You'll never lose me, beautiful. Never." Gwaine buried his face in her hair and held her closer. "Marian?"
"Hmm?"
"Where are we?"
A car drove past, its engine revving as it switched gears. Gwaine jumped at the noise.
She smiled and there was a laugh in her voice as she spoke. "Oh my god, I'm really back. Gwaine, this is my home."
He looked around at the trees and gave her a confused look.
"No, I didn't live here. This is my time, though."
A roaring plane in the sky above startled him. "What the hell was that?"
"An airplane. It's like… like a carriage, but it flies. It carries people across great distances." She couldn't help but laugh again.
"You think this is funny?"
"Sorry, it's just… this," she motioned to her dress. "And your tunic and your sword." Marian suddenly sobered, her eyes widening with realization. "Oh, fuck, your sword. You can't go around carrying an actual weapon!"
"What, you don't have weapons in the future?" he asked, still not wholly convinced that's where they were.
She shook her head. "Not that you can just carry around without permission and definitely not swords," she said. "Here, give me your hand."
She pulled him up and ran past the tree line. There was a paved road with little traffic just beyond the grass shoulder. It looked odd to Gwaine, but he supposed the roads here were built with a different material than in Camelot, depending on what type of quarry was nearby. But the fact it was smooth and there were no visible rocks confused him.
She heard the engine of a truck crest the hill behind them. Marian stuck out her thumb, hoping that it would stop, and they could catch a ride. She wasn't sure how far away from a town they were, but it would get dark soon. And by the chill already in the air, they must be approaching winter. The truck slowed as it neared the wandering couple.
"And that?" Gwaine asked, pointing as the truck stopped in front of them.
She turned to him. "This is a truck. A sort of… horseless carriage. I'm going to see if he can give us a ride into the nearest town."
An older man rolled down the window and grinned. "Need a ride, darlin'?"
"Please."
"Hop on in!"
She opened the door and motioned for Gwaine to climb into the cab when he paused to look at the strange dials and displays.
"Scoot on over, young fella. Gotta make room for your woman there," the driver said.
Gwaine slid over to make room for Marian and held out his hand to help her up.
"Where're you two headed?" the driver asked.
"Nearest town," Marian told him as she closed the door.
As the truck took off, Gwaine reached out and braced himself on the dashboard in front of him. He had never traveled so fast, especially without any horses. The scenery outside sped past them in a green blur.
"So," the driver began, watching Gwaine's strange behavior, "you two headed to a renaissance festival or somethin' dressed like that?"
"Just came from one," Marian said. It was technically true, except it was much further back than the Renaissance.
"What're you supposed to be, a hero and his damsel in distress?"
Marian chuckled. "Something like that."
Spells (a rough translation from the Merlin Wiki at merlin dot fandom dot com):
Buthed gwared. Hrag pob ailed. Hrag pob evnis. Boyd un thilis. – Out of a violent death. Quickly make it no longer useless. Quickly breathe now. Help him and cure him.
Ic þe þurhhæle þin licsare mid þam sundorcræftas þære ealdaþ æ! – I heal you thoroughly from your mortal wound with those special powers that are ancient! Oh!
Purhhaele dolgbenn! – Heal thoroughly the wound!
O drakon! E male so ftengometta tesd'hup'anankes! – O dragon, permit the appeal for an audience to speak here, fierce, wise-minded one.