I know, another long time between updates. My apologies to everyone reading this story, but I will say again I WILL finish this story, no matter how long it takes. So please bear with the long pauses in updates. My hope is you think it's worth it.

My mom let out a small, strangled noise. "You don't know? Seeley, I know what I've done has hurt you. I know that the only way to even try to make any kind of amends is to have these conversations, good and bad. But my hope was working through this would bring us closer. It seems to be doing the opposite, and now you say you don't know where our relationship stands, let alone where it could go?"

I looked up at her sharply, just as I heard Bones give a little gasp next to me. "See this, Mom, is what I mean. You seem to keep expecting this to work on some schedule you set. I appreciate you've been willing to really open up to me. That does mean a lot considering our starting point. But there's decades worth of hurt here. Just because you don't want conflict doesn't mean it isn't there. I still get the feeling that you're more comfortable with your new life with Reggie, especially since it's easier. Easier is not the point here. You think it was easier for me to deal with Dad than you? That it was easy for me in the Army? Did you even know I was captured and tortured? That I killed men as a sniper? You think it easy for me with Parker's mom and I not being married and I got to see Parker when she felt like it? Easier to deal with my gambling? None of that has been easy. Do I have regrets? Sure. But all of that makes up who I am and has led me here, to this life with Bones and Christine. And I can't regret that at all. The thing is, Bones and I have struggled to get here, and I don't think this life is necessarily easy either. It's worth it, without a doubt, but we both have brought our own baggage into this. We don't pretend it's not there, though, or just gloss over it like it doesn't matter. Because we know it does. We also know we're stronger for having gone through it, and we can and will support each other for everything: past, present or future."

At that last comment. I felt Bones lay her head against my shoulder. I turned my head slightly to kiss the top of her head. She looked up at that and gave me a soft smile. She and I stayed that way for a minute, silently conveying to each other in that glance our history, good and bad and everything in between, that got us here. She spoke up, saying quietly, "You've been my support through a lot of things, Booth, even before we were intimately involved. I don't know if I've ever really conveyed how much that has meant. You know I am not as competent as you are at emotional or social situations - "

I cut her off. "Except with me. Yo do pretty good with me. And I know how much it's meant to have someone in your corner. You may not have always said it every time, but I knew. Just like I think you knew how much it meant to have you back me up."

"Yes." She placed her hand in mine. "Yes I did." Then she frowned slightly and turned to look at Mom. "I believe I told you once that you have no idea of many of the situations in Booth's life that occurred to make him the man he is. You still don't. I know much more given that we were friends a long time. I have seen the damage you and your first husband inflicted on Booth. He is fortunate to be strong enough to not only have survived, but thrived in his life. I consider myself extremely fortunate to have him in my life and be the father of my child. He is correct about neither of our lives being easy. Yet we have accepted the difficulties in our lives and managed to persevere despite them. We did not, as you appear to have attempted to do, ignore them in order to have what we perceive as a better life. To me, this life I have with Booth is a better life. And I can only say that, through your own cowardice and refusal to acknowledge the past in any way until your wedding, that you have deprived yourself of a better life. I believe that having Booth in your life, regardless of your past with his father, would have enriched your life as well. You chose to turn your back on that. I believe we can all understand turning your back on Booth's father. That was a concern over actual physical harm. But Booth himself was also a victim, and you chose to leave him and Jared there. You don't have the right to do that and expect Booth to simply wave aside his feelings and concerns. Especially as he has his own family now. I have encouraged him to talk and listen to you, and forgive if he feels he can, but that is a decision that only Booth can make. Not you, not me, not Reggie – no one else. It is also not a situation than can or should be rushed. Booth can often be impulsive, but in this case it is best that he makes a decision after careful consideration. He is not even saying at this point, Marianne, that there is no chance of a decent relationship, just that he needs to figure out how to go forward. After everything he has gone through and the conversations we have had I should say that would be the least he's entitled to."

My mom was slumped against the back of the chair. "I know Temperance," she said quietly. "I do know. It's just the thought of him rejecting me tears my heart out. But I do recognize that if he does it will be because of my own actions, and whether you believe me or not, I have learned to accept consequences for my past behavior. I should have considered this one when I left, and I've learned that too. I know you both think I should have thought of that before, back when I left, and you would be right. But all I could think of was getting away. However I won't go into that again unless you need me too." She straightened up and lifted her chin. "You deserved better parents than you had, Seeley, and that's the thing I know more than anything else. I can't change the past. You're right that I've learned to try to make things easier after I left your dad. And my life with Reggie and his kids was easier, but that was part of Reggie's appeal originally. We don't all have the kind of relationship you and Temperance have. I don't know if there's anything more I can say to you to convince you that I do want to stay involved in your life. All your lives. Yours, Temperance's and Christine's. You don't trust me though and I understand that. I do. I -" At that she broke off and her eyes filled with tears. "Truly, though, Seeley, I do love you. Even if your decision is to cut me out of your life, please remember that if nothing else."

I let out a long breath. "I'm trying to hold on to that Mom. I remember some good times when Jared and I are kids, and when you came back I remember the talks, dancing in the living room with Christine – there are good memories Mom. But right now it's getting all mixed up with the other stuff. That's why I can't just wave my hand and say everything's fine. I can't. I'm worried enough about turning into Dad. I can't let this fester or I feel like I will. "I held my hand up as, out of the corner of my eye I saw Bones open her mouth to speak up. "I know you don't think that, Bones, I'm just saying what I feel like." She nodded.

I stood up to pour myself another Scotch. I walked back to the couch and still standing, I asked Mom, "You do understand why this isn't an overnight thing, right? I need to be sure that I can trust you not to decide me and my emotional baggage are too much or too hard and just say 'forget it' and walk away. One thing I do know about myself is easier doesn't usually work for me. Would I like some things easier? Who wouldn't? But I've learned to deal with the curve balls thrown at me over the years. I accept that's part of life and have learned to plow through an amazing amount of crap. Look I'm glad you found Reggie and that he was nothing like Dad. One marriage like that was enough. I get that, I really do. And if he made life easier for you, I'm OK with that too. It's just hard to accept your moving on to an easier life and leaving your kids in the old difficult one."

Mom left out a long sigh. "Believe me, I understand that. Even if I hadn't gotten that on my own, these conversations with the two of you would have made it abundantly clear. Which is a good thing, don't get me wrong. And you are both right. I have no right to demand or even expect anything. I'm hoping however we can keep meeting and talking." She paused, and looked at us a little hesitantly. "Reggie's coming down for a reunion in about a month or so. Maybe we could meet for dinner or something? He's asked a couple of times about whether you wanted to talk to him or not. Neither of us want to push though, so if you want to skip it, or at least skip asking Reggie questions and keep it social that would be fine, too."

I sat back down next to Bones and looked at her. She gave a small shrug and said, "It's up to you Booth. I would have no problem with it."

I looked back at my mom and said, "Let's start with dinner... "

Not sure if I will actually include Reggie or not. This was more conveying the concept of healing the rift somewhat. You know, a normal family kind of outing without the possibility of warfare breaking out...