Miru
"I can't see a thing," Andrew murmured.
"None of us can," Sadog hissed, "but you don't hear us whimpering about it."
"Boys," Lord Titus warned in a low voice, cowing both lads into silence.
Miru felt uncomfortable. She stood between Barba and Maric, surrounded by lords and ladies of the realm. None of them said a word to her, or even glanced down at her, and Miru sensed that they were doing it out of malice rather than politeness for the proceedings. One grey-haired old lady with a great big pair of pink lips on her dress was frowning to herself. Miru could see the deep lines on the side of her face, which had only deepened when Andrew had spoken up.
The High Septon was speaking, but she could only hear every second word spoken.
To distract herself, she looked upwards, where the statues of the Seven were placed so high up on the far end of the room that she could still see them despite standing in the furthest rows. Her eyes flickered from one to the other, marvelling at the detailed faces which seemed to be looking back at her.
The Father gave her a stern glare; neither cruelty nor kindness was visible, just a resolute and determined expression. By contrast, the Mother was smiling so benevolently that Miru felt tears go down her cheeks. The Warrior was handsome and proud, the Smith was resolute and focused. The Maiden's face was girlish and her smile was a modest one. The Crone's face was heavily lined, but she wore a protective expression. The Stranger's face was hidden by a large hood which cast a perpetual shadow. Did they even bother to carve a face under that hood?
It was a dazzling and holy place. She stared up at the magnificent dome with utter awe, forgetting the whole reason that she was standing in such a formidable crowd.
"In the sight of gods and men," came a sudden call from the High Septon, "I declare you to be one flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever!"
The crowd's response was so sudden that Miru cried out in alarm. Barba quickly put a hand on her shoulder as Miru clutched her dress out of instinct.
Abashed, she quickly released Barba and began applauding with the others, cheering when she caught a flash of white armour.
Two men of the Kingsguard strode past her, followed by the young prince called Aegon, laughing as he threw handfuls of flower petals all about him. Those petals he left in his wake were first trod on by Prince Valarr and Princess Kiera, then Baelor Breakspear and Lord Titus' sister, Princess Jena. Then came the funny-looking man from Tyrosh, the one who had walked the bride to the plinth, arm in arm with a blue-haired woman. King Daeron and Queen Myriah followed after, and then Miru stopped heeding the procession.
One benefit to their place in the rear was that they were among the first to leave the Great Sept. Soon, she stood outside with a fresh autumn breeze in her face. The sudden glare of the morning sun caused her to sneeze, as it always did whenever she stepped outside.
"Come now," Lord Titus declared. "We must offer our congratulations."
Dutifully, she and the others followed after Lord Titus as if he were a mother duck and they were his ducklings. Whenever she and Matthias had finished skipping rocks across the Crakehall pond, they had followed the ducks, laughing and quacking with the water birds, pretending to waddle like they did. Dwarfs waddle too. She knew that because Lord Crakehall's fool was a dwarf, and he had always walked in such a strange manner as if he were a great big duck. Her brother had always enjoyed imitating that dwarf's gait.
Now, however, the memory of his mockery made her feel bitter; Lord Titus had wanted to name his dwarf son after her brother. Did the gods mean for that? Are they punishing Matthias' mockery? She wished she could ask the gods that question, and a thousand more besides. But the best she could have done was to ask the statues, and she knew that statues never talked back.
Moving slowly to avoid tripping over her elaborate dress, Miru followed the others as they approached the bride and groom.
Lord Titus was first to them. He bowed to Princess Kiera and kissed her hand. Then he put his hand on the prince's shoulder. "Long and happy life to you, nephew," he urged. "May the gods spare you from the miseries which I have known."
Prince Valarr gave a curt nod. "Thank you, uncle," he replied in that cold voice of his. Princess Kiera's mouth stretched into a smile, but Miru saw that it was just for show. She had seen that false smile on many faces during her time in the Red Keep. It was as if these highborns had forgotten how to be happy.
Maric was first, then Sadog. Miru waited for her turn as Barba muscled over to the couple. Many others were pressing forward, held back only by the Kingsguard knights that formed a protective barrier around the prince and princess.
It was then that she noticed Cayn standing behind her. His arms were folded over his black and purple doublet. Miru was surprised; she knew that the eldest children went first, but she hadn't seen Cayn give his respects. "You missed your turn!"
Cyan frowned, then shook his head. "You're mistaken. I already gave them my best."
Miru did not believe him, but Papa had told her it was rude to call someone a liar. She turned back to the prince and princess, even as Barba stepped away from them.
She nearly tripped as she scurried up to the prince and princess. They looked so beautiful, so elegant, that she forgot any words that she'd planned to say. Hastily, she gave the best curtsy that she could manage.
"Gods bless you," she squeaked, trying to be heard over the tumult around her.
They glanced at her, then turned away as others approached them. She might as well have said nothing for all the notice they gave her.
Blinking back tears of shame, Miru backed away, grateful to the crowd for swallowing her up. I wished them well. You have to say thank you when someone blesses you, Mama said so.
Suddenly, she realised that she had drifted away from the others. The vast crowd was pushing past her, sidestepping her with curses and grunts of surprise. She could see no sign of Barba, Cayn, not even Lord Titus.
Panic seized her; she had no idea where to go, what to do, or whom to ask for help. The tears flowed down her face as she looked about her wildly. "Mama! Papa!"
No. They won't come. Not anymore.
"Lord Titus," she wailed. "Lord Titus!"
She could not be sure if the highborns around her were unable to hear her, or if they were ignoring her.
Just then, one of the ladies looked down at her and gave a start. "Gods be good," she cried out. "What is the matter, child?" She reached out to grab Miru's shoulder.
Fear and panic seized Miru, and she wrenched away from the stranger, screaming in fear.
Others were staring at her now, but calling to her. She put her head down and tried to flee.
She felt several boots step on the hems of her dress. Sometimes she heard the fabric tearing when she wrenched herself free. She was not sure where to go, or whom she could trust.
"Barba! Sadog! Lord Titus!"
A pair of hands suddenly seized her shoulders and lifted her up. She squealed with terror, wriggling and kicking with her feet as she was lifted up into the air.
"There you are!"
Miru found herself looking face to face with Ollo of Lannisport. A thrill of terror went through her body as she gaped at his weathered face.
For his part, he scowled at her as he took in her reaction. "Still frightened of me, child? I promised Lord Titus that I held no grudge against you, and I do not make oaths lightly."
"Oi," a voice called out. "What are you doing to that girl?"
Ollo turned to face the man who'd spoken out. As others turned to look at him, his face remained stony, but his voice was tinged with panic. "Mind your business! I serve her father!"
No you don't. My father's dead, and he was only a servant. "Leave him alone," she cried out, trying to defend Ollo.
Instead, others began to shout.
"You heard the girl," a woman shouted. "Leave her alone!"
Voices were growing louder.
Ollo looked about wildly in all directions, fear showing on his face. He quickly put Miru back on the ground. "I mean the girl no harm!"
Nobody seemed to listen to him. Three men seized him, and others called for the guards.
Miru felt panic seize her. She might have been terrified of Ollo, but he did not deserve this. She ran at one man who held him and swung her little fists against his hip. "Don't hurt him! Let him go!"
"She's hysterical," a voice called. "She doesn't know what she's saying."
"What's all this, then?" Two men in gold cloaks emerged from the crowd, carrying spiked clubs in their hands.
A dozen voices began shouting at them, including Miru. She vainly shrieked that Ollo was innocent, that she had been lost, but the goldcloaks were too busy listening to other voices.
Ollo was shoved forward towards them, and they laid hands upon him.
"Come here, little girl!" A lady knelt down and tried to grab her. Miru wriggled free and plunged into the crowd.
Beneath her alarm and horror, Miru felt stabs of guilt. Ollo had looked so afraid, more afraid than his trial. She dared not think about what might happen to him. She needed to find Lord Titus to make this right.
Before she could go far, however, another pair of hands seized her. She gave a cry, but she was held fast.
"No more running, now."
He wore all black, including his chainmail. The Targaryen dragon was emblazoned on his front, but it was chalk-white instead of red.
Miru wept afresh as the man's grip dug into both her shoulders. "Please," she begged, "that hurts!"
"Come along quietly, then," the man ordered. "You've caused enough trouble today."
She wanted to speak of Ollo, warning that he was going to be arrested again, but the man's unfriendly face frightened her. She dreaded what he might do to her if she was not a good little girl. I was a good little girl for Brodda too, and he still hurt me.
He led her along, shouting for the crowd to let him pass. She was not aware of how long it took, but they were walking down Visenya's Hill.
The man called out again, but Miru was not listening to his voice. She felt remote by her fear. Her feet moved obediently, moreso by this strange man's will than her own. She trembled with fear as she recalled how Brodda had led her down quiet corridors of the castle, far from her mother and the other servants in the kitchen.
Suddenly, she saw that they were approaching a long line of wheelhouses. Amidst all the noise around her, she heard a familiar voice, heated with emotion.
"… no idea what she's been through! And now imagine what might happen to her in this fucking crowd!"
"Brother, I understand! You know I do! But we have everyone available looking for her! What more can we do?"
"You must be patient, Titus…"
"Damn your talk of patience! I cannot stand here and wait! If anything should happen to her, I'll-"
Another memory stirred in Miru's mind, one that she had not recalled for a long time.
It had been just after her fourth nameday, and she'd gone exploring with her sister for Maiden's Day. They had attempted to sneak their way into the sept of Crakehall and receive a blessing from Septa Bethany. The guards had noticed them before they could enter, however, and they'd ordered them away whilst the ladies of House Crakehall were inside.
After that, Peony had needed to go to the privy, so she told Miru to wait for her. But Miru had gone off wandering along the castle grounds to hear the music. She had been able to get a necklace of flowers being handed out, and she'd gone up to the castle walls to try and look out at the countryside. It was quite some time before she grew hungry and wanted something to eat.
She had been able to find her way back to her home; even then, she was accustomed to Crakehall's grounds. She hadn't thought it a concern that she'd been away, until she'd returned to her family's little hovel.
Nobody was home except for her brother, Matthias. He had stared at her in shock when she'd strolled back inside.
"Where were you?" he'd cried out angrily. "Everybody is out looking for you!" He'd bolted out of the house to find them, ordering her to stay put if she knew what was good for her.
Miru had waited for her family to return, her dread growing as she imagined their fury. But when her mother and father ran back indoors, it had been so much worse than anything she'd imagined.
Mama was sobbing as she enveloped Miru in her arms and thanked the gods. Even Papa was weeping as he put his hands around them both.
"We were so worried," he'd declared in a choked voice. Then, he'd spoken louder, but there was no mistaking his alarm and his immense relief at her return.
Miru had begun to bawl as they'd held her; not because she had been afraid of punishment, but because she had made her parents so distraught. She knew full well what the gods thought of bad children who hurt their parents, and she had sworn she would never go wandering alone again. It had been a promise she'd kept; she'd only gone off with Brodda Hill, for she had trusted him and his authority.
Now she felt the old terror and shame grip her, like an ice-cold hand closing around her heart. It was bad enough to hear Lord Titus shouting in a voice that she hadn't heard him use, but she was aghast when she saw him.
His eyes were red, his face was pale, and he was pacing about in a wild frenzy. The other children were huddled in a group nearby, looking utterly subdued. The Prince and Princess of Dragonstone stood near Lord Titus; the princess wore a stricken face, whilst the prince was sad and sympathetic.
The knight called Ser Baelon Massey approached Lord Titus. "Mayhaps you can take the others back to the castle."
"I will go nowhere without Miru," Titus shouted. "That girl is my charge as much as they." He gestured to the others.
The man holding Miru chose that moment to call out. "Lord Titus! Your missing charge, I believe?"
The marcher lord turned; his eyes widened before closing shut as a great sigh left him. It seemed as though he might faint, before he sprang back to life. He bounded forward in two steps, knelt before Miru and pulled her close. She had already begun to sob.
"I'm sorry!" Her voice was muffled against his chest. His arms were shaking from emotion, and his breathing was ragged like her mother's had been. It was too much for her; she cried out louder so that he would hear her. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"
One of his hands was on the back of her head, stroking her gently. Her father might have done the same if he had still been alive.
"None of that, Miru," Titus urged. "You're safe. That is all I care about."
He straightened up, but when he did so, he picked up Miru in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck and tried to stop herself from weeping.
"Thank the gods!" It was the princess who'd spoken.
As she clung to him, she heard Lord Titus speak to the man who'd brought her. "You have my gratitude, ser. And I will personally see to it that you are justly rewarded."
That jolted Miru out of her state. She lifted up her head and spoke in Lord Titus' ear. "Ollo. He found me first, but the goldcloaks took him."
"What?" Titus' face had never been so close to her own.
Miru hastily told him what had occurred, prompting Lord Titus to send two of his knights to find Ollo and release him from custody.
By then, Lord Titus had placed her in one of the wheelhouses and shooed the others inside. He remained to ensure that Ollo was released, but not before ordering Cayn to make sure that everyone went to their chambers to prepare for the upcoming feast.
Cayn had barely responded, looking more surly than usual. Miru was too absorbed in her own misery to contemplate his, however.
As always, Barba sat beside her and held her close, but Miru could not stop thinking of how it had felt to be held in Lord Titus' arms, how his voice had sounded when she'd been lost and found, how he had looked at her. You are safe. That's all I care about.
She was still thinking of these things in Maegor's Holdfast when she and Barba put on new dresses for the wedding feast.
After they were finished getting dressed, there was a knock on the door, and Lord Titus entered, looking weary.
"Ollo is returned to us, alive and unharmed," he told Miru. "I thought you might want to know that."
He spoke truthfully. Miru breathed a sigh of relief. "Milord, tell him I'm sorry, please."
"He knows, child." Lord Titus glanced at Barba and Miru. "Are you ready for the feast, then?"
"Aye, milord," Barba replied.
"Good." He turned to leave, but paused when Miru hurried forward and tugged on his tunic.
"Lord Titus," Miru spoke shyly. "I think Matthias would be a good name for your son."
His weariness vanished, replaced with astonishment, then gratitude. "Thank you."
She might have nerved herself to say more, to ask something of him which had been on her mind since their reunion, but the prospect of it still daunted and repelled her. She could not stop recalling her parents, and their memory put an end to whatever words she might have said next. In any case, Lord Titus did not give her the chance to speak, for after he ran his hand over her hair, he turned away and went to fetch the boys from their chamber.
Barba approached Miru with a wary expression. "Is that all you wanted to say?"
Miru blushed. "I don't know."
Barba nodded. "Aye, I know that feeling."
Miru suddenly felt a deep frustration with herself. "When does that feeling stop?"
"If I ever find out," Barba quipped, "you'll be the first one I tell."