Hero examinations were typically a crowded affair. Whenever the day came when the ordinary man could be the next great superhero, everyone showed up to give it their best. Please be aware that the choice of "everyone" wasn't for the sake of simplicity. No amount of detail could properly capture the truth about hero examinations and their innate ability to summon all manner of people. It was as impressive as it was concerning, questionable, and sometimes disturbing.
Yet, those giving or overseeing the examinations were often in few numbers. The bulk of personnel on-scene were attendants and repairmen should any testing equipment be damaged. But today, like so many in recent history, wasn't normal. The situation was reversed. There was only a single participant in this exam while there was a small crowd waiting to see them perform.
The usual suspects were present. Lady Boros. Genos. Busho. Jinzuren. However, there were four unexpected guests as well. Geryuganshoop. Groribas. Melzargard. Doctor Kuseno.
Regarding the three alien elites, their reason for being present was sensible. In order to ensure that their mistress could become Saitama's true equal, they needed to see him "do his thing" in some way or another. Sure, the trio could watch him kill opponents over and over again with a single punch. However, not only would that get them nowhere fast, but it also wouldn't provide any useful data or general information. Even if the expectation were that Saitama would destroy damn near everything in this exam, that'd still be more useful for the trio's goals than watching monsters explode when his knuckles met their bodies.
Doctor Kuseno was truly the lone wild card here. No one, not even Genos, anticipated that the man would reveal himself so soon. Yet, there were multiple reasons for why. Each of them, similar to the elites' own, was logical and sound.
Genos, being a cyborg, recorded everything he saw or heard. So, when he started sharing his interactions and encounters with Saitama and Boros, Doctor Kuseno could easily verify that Genos hadn't hit his head and had gone mad. However, even when seeing Saitama and Boros's abilities in perfectly captured video, he needed to see it for himself to ensure that it was genuine. Boros was undeniably not human. Again, Genos's video recording technology was top-notch. Doctor Kuseno would know; he built it. But, much like Boros's feats of strength and power, he needed to verify her extraterrestrial origin himself. An in-person examination, respectful and tasteful, mind you, would clear any doubts. Doctor Kuseno wouldn't ask nor expect Boros to do anything outlandish or debasing. The Hero Association. There was an explanation for why Doctor Kuseno and Genos weren't a part of the organization. The man was as wise as he was intelligent. There'd been many rumors far too consistent in detail for Doctor Kuseno to be comfortable with the Association, which extended to the idea of Genos enlisting and not having someone to look after him. Although he wouldn't get much from this simple visit to one of their testing facilities, Doctor Kuseno could still get a proper measure of the two employees Genos, Boros, and Saitama were closely interacting with.In conclusion, out of everyone here, Doctor Kuseno had the most he wanted to learn or obtain. Of course, he was transparent about this to the others. He didn't want any secrets or mistrust between them.
As Saitama got himself ready for the exam in the facility's provided locker rooms, Doctor Kuseno talked with Boros and her elites. Amazingly, the good doctor hit it off with them. Particularly, he and Geryuganshoop were quick to showcase their intellect in one way or another. If Boros hadn't intervened, those two could've continued chatting for the remainder of the day!
"I must say, I am impressed, sir," Geryuganshoop confessed once their attention was brought back to the main topic. "You've taken everything remarkably well. The confirmation that life exists beyond your world. The existence of entities like Saitama or our mistress, who are essentially living gods. You are nothing like those two when all of this happened." He stated, pointing at Busho and Jinzuren alongside that last bit.
"The idea of life existing elsewhere in the universe is nothing special. To believe we're the only instance of life, regardless of intelligence, in a seemingly infinite universe is incredibly egotistical." Doctor Kuseno began. "As for Saitama and Lady Boros, that has yet to be seen. However, should Saitama prove to be as impossibly remarkable as he is in the footage and from Genos's accounts, then I'll have no reason to doubt that Lady Boros is too." He told them.
"Please, call me Boros," Boros requested with a flattered smile, delighted by his politeness. "We're likely to interact more due to Genos training with us, so I'd like there to be no formalities." She said.
"I'll only accept if you call me Kuseno. Genos has called me doctor enough for multiple lifetimes." Kuseno replied.
"Deal." Boros agreed, her smile growing.
"Excuse me." Genos spoke, getting all eyes on him.
"Genos, is something wrong?" Kuseno asked.
"I believe I've found an error in the exam." Genos answered before pointing at the testing area. "Among the devices, there is a whack-a-mole machine. The kind that is used in arcades. We need to remove it immediately to ensure the results are not negatively impacted." He informed them.
Note: The viewing area was located fairly high in the testing area. Think of it like a booth or "box" that the announcers and casters of a sporting event use. It was rather lavish, with comfortable furniture for anyone inside to relax in. Then again, given the usual turnout for hero exams, the choice of decor was undoubtedly for the staff's comfort. They'd be there for HOURS.
"Uh...no, Genos. That's not a mistake..." Busho sighed with a hung head. "Our...superiors wanted to try and make the exams fun while also being functional. The whack-a-mole game is meant to test the reflexes of the candidates." He explained.
"That is stupid." Genos bluntly responded, not hesitating in the slightest.
"Yeah, what the hell?" Boros joined in, looking at Busho and Jinzuren quizzically. "Your organization is meant to be significant, right? Yet, your superiors believe the best way to assess a person's reflexes is by playing a game?" She questioned.
"We never said they were the brains of the operation..." Busho muttered. Tragically, he and Jinzuren were aware that most of the higher-ups had earned their positions not because they were the best leaders but because they excelled at one or multiple aspects of marketing. Something that would undoubtedly be explored and expanded upon as the group moved forward was the Hero Association and its less-than-flattering qualities. One of which was that it was considered a business above all else most of the time by a vast majority.
"Hm?" Genos reacted to his sensors detecting movement. "It would appear that Master is ready. He's almost to the testing area." He announced.
Once heard, everyone gathered near the windows of the viewing area. Earlier, Busho and Jinzuren gave Saitama an earpiece to wear. Since he was the only one being "tested", the duo thought this would be easier and more comfortable than speaking over the PA system. The earpiece was connected to handheld radios in both men's possession.
After a few seconds, the bald man emerged from the corridor directly beneath the viewing area on the ground floor. His shiny scalp reflected the powerful lights in the room. However, there was another detail about Saitama's appearance that immediately garnered attention.
"...Um...Saitama..." Busho spoke through his walkie-talkie. He and the others stared wide-eyed at the man. The sole exception, unsurprisingly, was Genos.
"Yeah? What's up?" Saitama's voice came through the handheld radio without issue. When he spoke, he stopped moving forward.
"Out of curiosity...why...did you choose that...as your attire?..." Busho inquired, being VERY generous with the word "attire".
Instead of wearing his hero costume, blue tracksuit, or casual clothing, Saitama chose to adorn a dark blue Speedo.
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...
Oh? Were you expecting there to be more? No, silly reader, that's it. A dark blue Speedo. The defined musculature of Saitama was on full display. There was only one thing out of sight. No, you will not receive any further description than that.
Alright, to be fair, let's talk a bit more about Saitama's physique. Although, words probably can't do it justice. His build was, in all seriousness, the peak of human physicality. Not too bulky. Not too lean. Flawless muscle definition. Overall, Saitama was, quite literally, the perfect specimen for a male human.
Admittedly, Busho and Jinzuren couldn't help but feel a bit self-conscious. They weren't out of shape or overweight. If anything, they'd be considered fine specimens of the male persuasion as well. But when compared to Saitama? Yeah, no. No contest.
"What?" Saitama questioned, looking down at himself. "I didn't want to get any clothes sweaty." He explained
"...Will...this even make you sweat?..." Jinzuren asked.
"You can never be too careful." Saitama answered, being weirdly practical about this.
"Well...alright, then..." Busho said before clearing his throat and regaining his composure. "Head to the track first. We want you to run three laps." He instructed.
"Gotcha." Saitama replied, doing as he was told.
"If nothing else, the man is well-above the average individual." Kuseno commented, also returning to normal. "Then again, I suppose he'd have to be to keep up with someone such as yourself." He said, addressing Boros with that comment.
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...
"Boros?" Kuseno spoke again after receiving no response.
The others, also noticing Boros's silence, did the same. What met their eyes upon seeing her was a most unexpected sight. Boros's ENTIRE head was purple. Reminder: Boros's skin was blue, and her blood was red. So, whenever she blushed, it was purple.
Furthermore, it seemed as though Boros's pointed ears and spiky hair had stiffened. Actually, looking at the rest of her, everything appeared stiff. Even Boros's singular eye was locked up and unblinking. However, it did continue to stare at a certain man.
Deciding it was better NOT to press their luck, everyone silently agreed to-
"Boros!" Genos exclaimed with alarm. Damn it, you blonde-haired cyborg himbo. "Are you alright? Your temperature has suddenly increased! Your muscles are tense! Your fingers are gripping your-"
"Genos." Kuseno intervened, placing a hand on the young man's shoulder. "Remember, Boros is a lady. She simply wasn't expecting to see a man, be it Saitama or someone else, with so little clothing." He explained. "Right?" He inquired, speaking to the other three aliens in the room, hoping they'd catch on.
"Er, yes! As expected of you, good, sir! You're VERY perceptive!" Geryuganshoop exclaimed in agreement.
"Indeed. Our lady simply assumed that Saitama would be in his champion's attire. She wasn't prepared to see him so...visible." Groribas said.
"Typically, for events like this, many cultures and races would wear ceremonial garments." "Uniforms. Specific costumes. Etc." "It's more common than you think." Three of Melzargard's heads told him.
"Ah. I see." Genos began, thinking it over. "Perhaps we should expose Boros to more of human culture to prevent further episodes?" He suggested.
"A splendid idea!" Geryuganshoop exclaimed again, supporting the notion. "Once this Hero Association business is settled, we'll dedicate some time to educating our mistress, as well as ourselves and the crew, about Earth and everything it contains." He decided, receiving nods from Groribas and Melzargard in agreement.
"Understood. I'll start researching activities and pass-times suited for groups." Genos promised.
With a collective sigh of relief, everyone, excluding the oblivious cyborg, was grateful that this potential situation was resolved. Additionally, they were fairly certain they knew the real reason for why Boros was reacting this way. But they'd be sure to keep such theories to themselves. Besides, they were nothing more than speculations based on this isolated reaction. The others were likely WAY off the mark with their thinking, and their "explanation" was probably closer to the actual truth.
"Okay." Saitama's voice came through the radio. "I'm ready when you guys are, just tell me when." He stated.
"Right," Jinzuren responded as everyone re-focused. "Runner, on my mark. Three. Two. One. Go." He said.
Five seconds. That's how long it took. Three full laps. Five seconds. With every step, Saitama created a dent in the floor. When he was done, there was a rut in the track precisely where his feet had stepped.
"Hoo." Saitama breathed out with his hands on his hips. "How was that? Need me to do it again?" He asked.
"..." Everyone looked like Boros now, minus the blush. Even though the trio of elites, alongside Busho and Jinzuren, knew what to expect, it didn't make it any less impressive.
"Amazing, Master!" Genos cheered, followed by a round of applause.
"Heh, thanks, Genos." Saitama replied, flattered by the compliment. "So, what's next?" He inquired.
"...Whack-A-Mole..." Busho muttered.
"Cool." Saitama casually said before approaching the machine.
In what other ways could one describe the display the group witnessed? Sincerely, is there anything left? Saitama's godliness was well-established by now. It's become progressively more difficult to try and do it justice through literary description.
Whack-A-Mole? Oblitered. Also, a perfect score. Shotput? The testing facility had a new skylight. Hopefully, no poor, unsuspecting passerby got hit with it. Side steps? A blur. Weight lifting? Like raising a pillow. We could keep going, but what point would there be? Saitama, as known, was too strong.
During all of this, Kuseno was speechless. However, his scientifically focused brain was quick to process the seemingly impossible feats before him so that it could form questions. How could any human, regardless of enhancements, reach such a pinnacle of power? What answers and information could be unearthed by studying Saitama? Would trying to obtain such knowledge be dangerous? Was there any to be found at all?
Eventually, Saitama finished the tests. Total time? Fifteen minutes. The exam for the average person took, at minimum, an hour. The others assumed they'd be here for a LITTLE bit. But nope. They were done in time for brunch!
"Anything else?" Saitama asked after he completed the final test.
"Nope. That'll do. As expected, you broke every record in the Association's history." Jinzuren answered.
"Really? Wow." Saitama said, somehow surprised by this outcome. "What now?" He inquired.
"Busho and I are going to collect the data and footage. Head to the locker room and get changed. We'll regroup in the lobby once we're all ready." Jinzuren instructed.
"Alright. See you, then." Saitama told him before heading toward the corridor he emerged from.
"I shall go greet Master and congratulate him on his performance." Genos decided before hastily leaving the room.
"Geryuganshoop, Doctor Kuseno," Busho spoke, getting the attention of those he addressed. "Would you like to come with us? We can make copies of everything for you to study for yourselves." He offered.
"Yes, that'd be appreciated." Kuseno accepted.
"Agreed. That'll make things easier for us." Geryuganshoop chimed in. "Groribas, Melzargard, attend to our lady. She's still unresponsive." He ordered.
"What? Why us? Why do WE have to get the only hard job?!" Groribas questioned.
"Are you capable of understanding and carefully handling the materials?" Geryuganshoop challenged.
"..." Groribas lowered his head in silence.
"Thought so." Geryuganshoop remarked with a smirk before departing with Busho, Jinzuren, and Kuseno.
Thus, the testing day was over. The actual day had barely just begun! As everyone attended to their various tasks, they also thought about what would happen next. The world was about to become a lot more interesting once Saitama and Boros were properly revealed to the Association and the population.
However, everyone REALLY should've looked into where the shotput went. I mean, a big metal ball flying at speeds faster than any bullet was a cause for concern! Someone would die if they got hit by it! Such as the humanoid mantis man that had been on top of the building in the same location as the shotput's exit! No one even noticed the green blood that had trickled from the corpse, through the hole, and down the dome-shaped ceiling of the testing area!