It all started on an ordinary day in Heeler household. Bingo was in the playroom making an object out of colored dominos. As mum enters the playroom from the backyard, she sees that Bingo has made a "love heart". Australians refer to this type of heart to distinguish it from an anatomically correct heart.
"Wackadoo! Did you set up all those dominoes?"
"Yeah. It's for Dad. It's a love heart."
"Aww, 'cause you love your dad."
"Yeah."
"I'm gonna let him knock over the first domino."
Bingo eagerly rushes toward the kitchen where Bandit is. He appears to be talking with someone about his work and looks annoyed with the conversation.
"Dad, come with me!"
"Okay, hang on, kid."
"Come on!"
"I've just got to type this work e-mail."
"Come on, Dad!"
"Bingo, let go, mate."
"Hey, look, I'll just explain it."
"I just want to show you something. Come on!"
"Bingo, let go!"
Crestfallen, Bingo heads back to the playroom fatherless. She was so elated to let Bandit knock over the first love heart domino, but it appears he is busy with work. Which is weird, because he's almost never at work…how can archaeology have remote positions now, if it is supposed to be all about field work?
Regardless, Bingo knocks over the first love heart domino and the dominos cascade into a shattered love heart. Didn't Bandit promise his daughters that he would always love them? Is he the reason why her heart is held so tight yet is broken?
Sometime later…
"Hey, kid. Have you seen Bingo?"
Bluey doesn't respond to her father's initial question, instead noticing that his tail has been braided, to which Bandit also notices that Bluey's tail is also braided. The braiding has also affected their mum's tail.
"You know what this means?"
"What?"
"We've got fairies!"
(This episode of Bluey is called: Fairies)
Knowing about the infestation they are currently dealing with; the Heelers retreat into the garage and attempt to gear up to deal with the fairies. Their mum is armed with a hockey stick while their dad has a welding mask for armour and a cricket bat as a weapon. He also gives Bluey a plastic cricket bat for her weapon, even if it won't deal as much damage as the real thing. He then shows his family a picture of a fairy. The child's drawing of a fairy has wings, a tiara and a wand with a star ornament on it. The drawing of the fairy has a smug aura that mocks them.
"I can't believe they're back."
"All right. This is a fairy. If you see one, whack it."
Sure, whack the supernatural creature with a sports weapon, its not like they have magic or anything. Oh yeah, there's also one other thing…
"But they're invisible."
"You have to look for fairies with your heart."
"My heart says they're under here!"
Bandit whacks a bunch of stuff covered under a tarp. No fairies, but he did knock off some painting supplies, lubricant and a paint can of turpentine.
"Ah, it's just turps."
"Maybe they've gone."
Nope, as the fairies' mischief seems to have spread and is getting more irritating by the minute!
"Aah! Bluey, your bottom!"
"Aaah!"
"Aah! Mum!"
"You've got a peg beard!"
"Aaaah!"
"What are we gonna do?"
"That's it."
"It's time to step this up a notch."
They head to the backyard where Bandit emerges from the shed with a couple of crab pots.
"Let's do this."
"Crab pots?"
"If they can catch crabs, they can catch fairies."
Now hold on, Bandit might be on to something…in one piece of lore, butterfly nets can nullify fairy magic, but that is only theoretical and no one has tested it yet…but it also hasn't been debunked. That still doesn't help Bandit because how is he going to trap the fairies in crab pots?
Bandit hears a phone ringing.
"Huh?"
"It's your phone."
Bandit checks and finds out that he doesn't have his phone on him.
"Where's it gone?"
"Over there."
The phone is shown to be surrounded by a circle of stones and flowers. Bandit's mate Rocko is calling but he can't get it out because…
"I'll get it!"
"Bluey! Stop!"
Bluey steps into the circle, it magically gives her the compulsion to do a lively jig!
"Aaah!" I can't stop dancing!"
Their mum explains why this is happening.
"It's a fairy ring. If you step inside, you dance and dance until you drop!"
"Oh, no! I'll see if I can knock her out with Bingo."
"Yeah! Like marbles!"
"Yeah!"
Well, they did manage to knock Bluey out of the fairy ring…but Bingo is now trapped in it, being forced to jig!
"I can't stop dancing!"
"Why did I think that would work?"
Mum tries to fish Bingo out using her hockey stick.
"Bingo! Grab on!"
The rest of the family pull hard and manage to get Bingo out of the fairy ring.
"Hooray!"
"Oh, no! Look!"
The viewing area gives us a wide panoramic shot of the back yard, now covered in fairy rings, approximately 15 of them, all containing things like electronics or toys, one of the rings even has Chattermax in it (but honestly, they can keep him)! The Heelers run back into the house, terrified.
They hide in the pantry. Their mum now has a dry lasagna noodle as a weapon.
"We need a change of plan!"
"Let's call the police!"
I'm pretty sure supernatural occurrences are outside of the Brisbane police department's jurisdiction, but sure, they might be able to do something.
"Your phone's in the fairy ring."
"We need to give the fairies what they want."
"Yeah, then they'll leave us alone."
"What?! I'm not rewarding naughty behavior."
"Aah! Dad, your hands!"
"Huh?"
Bandit raises his paws, which are now bound by a pair of roller skates!
"Aaah!"
"Grrr, little ratbags!"
"But what do the fairies want?"
"Maybe one of us hurt the fairies' feelings?"
"And now they're causing mischief."
Bandit can sense that they think this is his fault, which it is, but he still tries to sarcastically wave off their accusations.
"Well, if that's true, how would this 'one of us' go about trying to fix things with 'the fairies?'"
"Hmm. Bingo, are you brave enough to go and look for clues to what the fairies might want?"
"I am!"
Bingo runs off toward the living room to find clues on what the fairies want while the rest of the family waits in the pantry. Bandit fluffies and almost kills his family with his noxious fumes since they're an in enclosed space, and he even has the audacity to blame the fairies for it. This was even worse than the time he tricked Bingo into pulling his finger in that elevator and they all can't believe Bingo fell for that! Bluey tries getting the skates off of Bandit.
"Come on, Bluey. Get 'em off!"
"I'm trying! The fairies used a triple knot."
"Bingo's been gone for ages."
"Maybe she's found a clue."
Bingo arrives back at the pantry with news of her investigation and it doesn't sound good…
"Come quickly!"
The Heelers are now in the living room, where the see the fairies have trashed the place.
Photos of mum have been turned upside-down, and photo of Bluey has been dressed with a tie. A pair of potted plants have been turned into "gum trees" with sticks of chewing gum and gumballs. A show has been hung from the ceiling on a rope made of shoelaces, with an action figure riding in it. A dozen thongs (that's what Aussies call "sandals" or "flip-flops") form a trail of footsteps across the wall. Bones have been stuck in the bone-shaped cutouts in the transom woodwork. Stuffed koalas hang from the falls, and a trail of fairy bread leads down the banister. The couch has been turned into a "car" with the addition of record "wheels" and saucer "headlights". A photo of Bandit, defaced with angry eyebrows, moustache, and jagged teeth sits in the driver's seat.
"Oooh."
"Look! It's a message from the fairies."
"It's a picture of Dad, dancing 'round our letterbox."
"Hey, why have I got stink lines coming off me?"
"The fairies must think you stink."
"What?!"
"I think they want you to fairy dance around our letterbox."
"What? I'm not doing' that!"
"Dad! You have to!"
"No way."
"Do your worst, fairies! I'm not scared of you!"
Bandit probably should not antagonize the supernatural creatures that have already messed with his family, trapped all their stuff in fairy rings and trashed their house. But sure, maybe make the fairies angry enough to kill you, that'll teach them!
"Eee!"
"Ha! See? Nothing."
"Bingo!"
"Aaah! The fairies have frozen Bingo!"
"Because of you!"
"Curse you, fairies!"
How dare these fairies curse me with the consequences of my own actions!
"Well. You know what you have to do."
"Oh, no."
"Hee-hee! I'll get the speaker!"
They head out to the front yard, where a bunch of the neighbors in their community are currently having fun.
"Oh, man! There are people everywhere!"
"Nice roller skates, Bandit!"
Bandit is annoyed by Lucky's dad's comment, but there is something more important for him to do right now.
"This isn't about you. You have to break the fairies' spell."
"Okay. One thing first."
He approaches the frozen form of Bingo.
"Hey, frozen Bingo. If I've ever hurt your feelings, I'm really sorry, mate. Must feel really bad when your dad does that. Just know that I love you, kid, and I'd do anything for you."
He stands up, ready to do the dance.
"Right. Let's do this!"
"Yeah!"
Track now playing: John Ryan's Polka by Artist Unknown
"Go!"
Bandit begins performing an Irish jig to appease the fickle feckers. The neighbors take note of the dance.
"Whoa! Yeah!
"Yeah!"
"Go, Dad!"
"You can do it!"
"I am the Lord of the Dance!"
Ok, Riverdancer, you're being forced to perform a jig to appease some fairies you run afoul of, he definitely isn't jigging for the love of the dance this time.
It does appear to be working, as the fairies' magic appears to be weakening. Since Bingo is now able to move parts of her body.
"It's working!"
"Keep dancing!"
"Don't stop!"
"Is this what you want, fairies?!"
"Ooh! There's a hand!"
"Are you not entertained?!"
"Ohh... ohh..."
"Errrah!"
"Bingo!"
The neighbors cheer as Bingo has been unfrozen!
"Yeah!"
Bandit continues to dance, as the magic continues to erode. Next, he manages to pull the triple-knotted skates off his paws! The rest of the Heelers decide to join in on the jig.
"Whoo!"
"Go, Bingo!"
The song fades out as everyone around enjoys the grand dance.
A few hours later, in the back yard. The Heelers are reminiscing about the day.
"What a day!"
"Yeah, I'm glad the fairies got what they wanted."
"Me too."
"Ooh, can we play Spotlight?"
"Yep, go and get the torch."
"Yeah!"
Bingo heads into the house to get the torch, heading into the playroom she notices that…
"Hey, who set up my dominoes again?"
The dominos are back in place from before Bingo dejectedly knocked them over. The large "cracks" of dominos that split the heart the first time are now gone.
Bingo stares in astonishment as she sees a lavender colored entity with long pointed ears and thinly crafted insectoid wings flittering about. It places the final domino completing the repaired love heart and it gazes at Bingo briefly. Bingo, surprised that yes, fairies are real, calls her dad over to see the entity.
"Dad!"
"What is it, Bingo?"
"Look."
"Oh, wow."
"It's a love heart!"
In the shadows, far from here, something has seen what has happened at the Heeler household and is amused.
"I have an idea to make our plans come to fruition. I just need some time…"
So…Old English Sheepdog wants us to make a general overview note about faeries…
Sorry to disappoint him, but faeries are not those little creatures with wings and wands. There isn't one uniform description of fairies. Since the little feckers have been plaguing the Western world for a long time now.
I'm here to tell you that faeries are not to be trusted, and they are definitely not what pop culture depicts them as.
The faeries are monsters, nay, demons, bringing misery and death across my homeland! What am I talking about? The fecking shites have been causing chaos across the Eire since the 12th century! How do I know this? Well, I'm fecking Irish, so my people would have firsthand experience with these demons! Also, there are known historical records in several supernatural phenomena museums across Ireland.
Right, I'm sure you heard of the mass hysteria the faeries caused back in the olden days? How they've been rumored to swap children with their own, comically grotesque disguised children? And how to get them to swap back, you needed to threaten to incinerate the child and there is a small chance the faeries would swap the children back?
While some children were indeed very ugly back then, and I do think that some babies were so ugly that forced their parents to indulge in rudimentary eugenics, there is still a non-zero chance that faeries could have actually done this, since after all, faeries to this day, still haven't been debunked as a concept.
Do you still need more proof? The Irish government rerouted construction for a new road so that it didn't go through a tree that might be inhabited by faeries, fearing a retributive curse by the fae folk.
There is also a group of faeries from the Eire, known as the Aos Sì with their homeland being known as the sìdhe, but talking about them is above the scope of this general overview note, maybe my boss will commission a note about them later.
Feck, I need to drink some black gold at the nearest tavern.
I.S.
Author's Note: We finally have some main story exposition, and it only took until the third backstory chapter to establish it. Hooray!
Another milestone is the first track usage in the fic. More will be planned later down the line.
By the way, it is spelled "fairies" in this backstory chapter because it is adhering to the canon episode as much as possible; It is spelled "faeries" in all other instances, as shown in the Phenomena Research Organization's note left by our Irish friend here.