As Tifa stood beneath the water tower, its form silhouetted against the night sky, she was seized with a moment of near giddiness. For just a second, she was thirteen again. Tifa pressed a hand to her heart and felt its steady, rapid beat.
It was late at night. Her dad did not know she was out. Tifa bit back a smile. When had she last let herself feel such unabashed anticipation?
She turned to check that Cloud was still following her. He was. His child counterpart was following too, but at a more ambling pace. He kicked at the dirt and darted off at random, to investigate rocks or pick up sticks that he swished in the air like weapons.
The child seemed entirely oblivious to the sweeping, starry sky. But Tifa watched as Cloud paused to look up, just as a shooting star left a sparkling path across the sky. His eyes looked soft to Tifa for a moment, rather than lost and confused.
I can't see a sky like this without thinking about you. Our promise at the water tower. And that first night together.
"Tifa?"
Tifa jumped and pressed a hand to the sudden ache in her head. Cloud was watching her now, rather than the stars. He seemed uncertain again, but the softness had not left his face. Tifa motioned him forward.
When he did not move, Tifa came to him instead, backing away from the water tower to stand at his side. Their shoulders just barely brushed. Together, they looked up.
"Look, Cloud."
Tifa titled her head back, taking in the full view.
"The sky was gorgeous that night, remember?" she asked softly. "It was just you and me."
She could feel Cloud watching her, but she kept her eyes fixed on the stars.
"You didn't make up this sky, you remembered it."
Tifa made her voice firm, uncompromising. Cloud did not respond to indicate agreement, but he did not dispute her words either. Once, that might have been enough for Tifa. But not anymore. She prompted him.
"Tell me what you remember, Cloud."
Now she looked at him.
He was studying her face just as intently as Tifa had scanned the night sky. At her question, his eyes went distant, seemingly searching through his memories.
Tifa reached for his hand. "Show me?"
Cloud closed his hand around Tifa's. For a long moment, he did not move or speak. But then he looked up at the underside of the water tower. Tifa followed his gaze. They saw two booted feet hanging over its edge.
"I was getting cold," he said slowly. "And I thought…"
His voice tapered off. Cleared his throat.
"I thought you would never come."
Tifa looked away from the water tower to glance at Cloud. He closed his eyes. Tifa closed hers as well. For a moment, she felt an anxious anticipation similar to the one she had felt herself on that night so many years ago. But she felt other things too.
A carefully guarded yearning. It competed with another feeling. One Tifa was not sure how to describe. It felt like sadness. Or perhaps shame.
Tifa opened her eyes, frowning. She gave Cloud's hand a gentle tug.
"Let's go up and see, hmm?" Tifa suggested.
She moved toward the water tower and stepped onto the ladder. After a moment, she heard Cloud following. Together, they paused at the top. Cloud, as a teenager, was seated there, his back facing them.
Tifa nudged Cloud with her shoulder before moving forward to take a closer look.
Teenage Cloud was perched near the corner of the platform. His hands were folded in his lap and his eyes were pointed downward, toward his dangling feet. Tifa smiled at the small ponytail in his hair, the soft curve of his face.
She turned back to look at Cloud, still standing near the ladder. Tifa motioned him forward, then looked back at his younger form. She was unable to stop herself from smiling. When she felt the warmth of Cloud at her back, she spoke.
"You were so much smaller, then…" She turned to grin at him. "And cute."
Cloud's brow was furrowed as he looked between his past self and Tifa. She walked around him, toward the spot where she knew her teenage self would soon be sitting.
"Go on," she said, pointing at the spot next to teenage Cloud. "Sit."
Cloud hesitated for only a moment before complying. Tifa remained standing, waiting. It was not long before they heard it. Careful footsteps and a soft greeting.
Heya.
Thirteen-year-old Tifa peaked around the rounded barrel of the water tower. Both Clouds watched as she sat near them on the adjacent edge of the platform.
So, what did you want to talk about?
Tifa took a seat next to herself. They swung their legs in unison. When Tifa turned back toward Cloud, he met her eyes over the heads of their younger selves. Tifa smiled at him apologetically.
"Sorry I was a little late," she said. "I couldn't decide what to wear."
Together, they looked at the Tifa who was wearing a blue-green dress and strappy sandals. Teenage Cloud glanced too but seemed unable to look longer than a second or so before turning his face away.
The dress had been Tifa's favorite. Brightly colored with a romantic, flouncy skirt. The shoes were delicate and pretty, but horribly impractical. At thirteen, it had seemed like exactly the kind of thing a girl would wear to meet up with a boy she might like.
When spring comes, I'm leaving town. Teenage Cloud spoke the words without looking at her. I'm going to Midgar.
Teenage Tifa turned her eyes away. Tifa watched the array of emotions playing across her face. The mixture of disappointment and sadness. Although his younger self was still looking at his knees, Cloud was watching too. He looked perplexed.
Should have figured. All the guys are leaving.
Cloud and Tifa watched together as the memory unfolded. Teenage Cloud's insistence that he was different than the other boys, that he would be a SOLDIER. The best of the best. Like Sephiroth. His young face was hopeful, full of dreams. Of possibility.
Tifa had been hopeful back then too. She watched as a grin slowly spread across her younger face, the thrill of a sudden idea chasing away the initial letdown.
Just…promise me one thing.
Cloud and Tifa looked over at each other at the same time. The look on Cloud's face was unreadable to Tifa. But the younger version of himself by his side did not dissemble his emotions nearly as well. He was surprised at the request.
"I was surprised at myself too," Tifa explained softly. "You were so intent on leaving. I think part of me just wanted to make sure that you would come back."
Her words seemed to surprise Cloud just as much as the initial promise.
They both turned their eyes back to the memory. It continued. Tifa's playful coaxing. The subsequent sealing of their promise. After, neither teen made eye contact, but rather snuck glances when the other was not looking.
Slowly, their teenage selves faded away, leaving Cloud and Tifa sitting alone.
Tifa moved into the space where she had sat seven years ago. She reached again for the emotions of that night. The excitement. Her sorrow that Cloud would be leaving. The way her heart raced at her own daring, to ask a boy, and Cloud at that, to make her a promise.
Brimming with the feeling of it, Tifa turned to look at Cloud. He had been watching her. Emotions danced across his face as well. Many of them were the same ones that Tifa felt. But one emotion predominated.
Doubt.
Tifa looked away. The lack of Cloud's faith in the memory hurt. The mistrust. It was their last childhood memory together. After that night, she had not seen him again for years.
"We never even got to say goodbye after," Tifa said sadly. "But I thought about you. All the time. I checked the mail for letters. Read the newspapers."
Tifa sighed, shaking her head.
"But I didn't hear anything. You were just gone. Until that day I saw you again in Midgar."
Now, Tifa looked at Cloud again. He was hanging onto her every word, but his face was uncertain. Tifa locked eyes with him.
"You were different, Cloud. In so many ways. It confused me sometimes. Scared me, even. I didn't know what to do."
Tifa could tell that her words, the acknowledgment that he had been different, frightened Cloud. But she kept going.
"But in other ways, you were exactly the same as I remembered. And there was one thing that had not changed, not even a little."
Tifa leaned in just a bit, as if to share a secret. After a moment, Cloud did as well. Tifa pressed a hand to her heart.
"It was how I felt," she confided. "Even after all those years, that hadn't changed. That's why, despite everything, I still believed you were Cloud."
Cloud's eyes went wide, and for just a second, Tifa was certain he believed it too.
But then his face went tight, and he averted his eyes, pulling away.
The rejection was clear. Not of Tifa, but the possibility that her words might be true. Tifa moved back as well, giving him space. They sat together on the water tower in silence for a long moment, each staring off into the darkened village.
Eventually, Tifa dared to look at Cloud again. His face was still troubled. He looked as if he were grappling with his own thoughts, an internal argument that he could not win. Tifa spoke to him again.
"Back in the crater, you said it was me, my words. That was all that mattered." Tifa shook her head. "But that wasn't true."
Cloud did not look at her, but Tifa could tell that he was listening.
"My words, my memories, how I felt. It's not enough. It has to be you, Cloud."
At his name, Cloud looked at Tifa again.
"Memories aren't enough," she said. "They can be confused, distorted. It has to be something you're certain of. A feeling maybe. Something deep down, protected."
Cloud gave her a confused, pleading look. It begged Tifa to tell him what to do. Tifa thought for a moment, then she did.
"Tell me something about our childhood, Cloud. Something you've never told me before."
The request startled him. He stared at Tifa, wide-eyed. She continued.
"Like the night at the water tower. Your memory of it was the same as mine. But tell me something I don't know about that night. Before we climbed up just now, you started to tell me something. What was it?"
Cloud opened his mouth, then closed it again. He looked nervous. Tifa took a deep breath and waited him out.
"I was getting cold," he whispered finally, repeating his words from before. "And I thought…I thought you would never come."
He paused. When he did not continue, Tifa spoke.
"I was running late, right?"
Cloud shook his head. "Yes, but that wasn't it. I thought…"
He stopped talking.
"You thought?" Tifa prompted gently.
He still did not answer. It seemed to Tifa that his form was flickering before her eyes. She blinked. When she opened her eyes, his form had settled. Shrunk. In that moment, he appeared to Tifa as fourteen years old again.
"I thought," he said in a small voice, "that Tifa hated me."
Tifa flinched. "You – what?"
Her voice came out louder than she meant, and Cloud jumped. The movement jerked him back into himself. He was an adult once more. Cloud hung his head.
Tifa's heart clenched.
"Cloud," Tifa pleaded. "Will you look at me?"
He would not. A muscle twitched in his jaw. He kept his face stubbornly turned away from her. Part of Tifa wanted to grab Cloud, to force him to face her. To see the truth in her eyes. To shake him. Yell at him that it was not true.
But she had asked Cloud to tell her something he had never told her. Something about that night she had not known. Something deep down, protected.
She supposed he had.
"I…didn't know you thought that," she said finally.
Tifa heard the stunned sadness in her own voice. Cloud did not react to her. Still, his head slumped, his eyes facing downwards. Tifa tried to reassure him.
"I didn't hate you, Cloud. Not at all," she continued. "I was excited you asked me. Nervous, too, I guess. That's why I took so long getting ready."
Briefly, Tifa closed her eyes, remembering that day.
"It was a little out of the blue," Tifa admitted. "I was surprised by all of it, I think. That you asked me to the water tower, and then, that you wanted to join SOLDIER."
Cloud hunched his shoulders but still did not say anything. The confession seemed to have used up all his words. Talk to me, Cloud. Tifa kept her eyes fixed on him. She needed to know more. To understand.
"Why did you want to join SOLDIER? It seemed like such a sudden decision."
There was no response. Tifa tried to peer into Cloud's face, but it was turned away from her. Cloud was entirely shut down. Tifa bit her lip, unsure what she should do.
"Hey!"
A small voice called out from below. Tifa looked down, over the edge of the water tower. Cloud, as a child, waved up at her with both hands. He gestured for her to come down. His face was urgent.
"Cloud?" Tifa tried to get his attention. "Why don't we go down now?"
No response.
Tifa waited a moment, then stood, hoping he might follow. She climbed down the water tower.
Child Cloud waited at the bottom. He looked solemnly at Tifa when she stepped off the ladder, then looked up again. Tifa followed his gaze. To her relief, he was watching Cloud climb down.
Once Cloud reached the bottom, the child dashed off. Cloud and Tifa followed behind more slowly. He came to a stop in front of Cloud and Tifa's childhood homes. Tifa stopped in front of him, but Cloud moved to stand at his side.
The child nodded at Cloud, before turning to Tifa.
"I can help!" he said. "I think."
He adopted a confident stance, lifting his chin. It was a stark contrast to the adult next him, his head so low his chin nearly touched his chest.
"What did you ask us?"
Tifa bent down to answer his question, the way she would if she were talking to Marlene. He watched her calmly. Had Cloud's eyes really ever been such a soft, light blue? After weeks of looking at Cloud's mako-altered eyes, Tifa had nearly forgotten.
"I asked why you wanted to join SOLDIER," Tifa told him.
He nodded, still so serious. "We know why. Right?"
The question was directed to the adult at his side. Cloud exchanged a heavy look with his childhood self. Together, the Clouds seemed to fold into themselves. They looked down at their feet, scuffing the dirt in unison.
Child Cloud answered Tifa first, his voice tiny.
"I was devastated," he said. "I wanted to be noticed."
The child reached over to Cloud, grabbing his hand. He tugged on it insistently. Cloud shook himself. He lifted his head, but kept his gaze averted to the side.
"I was devastated. I wanted to be noticed," Cloud repeated. "I thought…if I got stronger, that someone might notice me."
Tifa looked between the two Clouds, unsure who she should be addressing. She supposed it did not matter. Both were avoiding her eyes.
"Someone to notice you?" she asked slowly. "Who?"
At her question, the child dropped Cloud's hand and looked at Tifa. His little face was indignant. He stomped his feet and waved his skinny arms.
"Who?! You know who!"
He ran behind Cloud's back and gave him a shove in Tifa's direction. He was not strong enough to budge Cloud's larger body, but he took the hint and stepped closer to Tifa anyways. Finally, his eyes met hers.
"You," he said.
Cloud's gaze was intense, full of emotion. He was looking at her in a way she was not quite sure anyone, much less Cloud, had ever looked at her before.
Or had he? She supposed he had looked at her this way, with that same intensity, at least twice. As she held his hand in Gongaga. Face inches from her own, right before he had kissed her on the gondola. And –
Tifa is outside, the earth beneath her back. Cloud face is tucked into her neck, but he lifts it to look her in the eyes. Behind him, the sky is full of stars. They are both breathless, desperate for one another. But Cloud is still for a long moment, just looking at her. His hand trembles as it lifts to cup her cheek.
Cloud hand was still on her face, but now it is brushing damp bangs off her forehead. His eyes are rimmed with red and his face is haggard. There is a warm weight on Tifa's chest, a small body with a fuzz of blond hair. There is a flurry of activity by the bed, doctors and nurses. Cloud sees none of it. He is focused on Tifa, like he might never look away from her. He bends his face down to press his forehead against hers.
Now they are standing apart, in a crowded room. Familiar faces swam between them, but Cloud looks above all of them to meet Tifa's eyes. A child is lifted against his shoulder, her tiny arms wound tightly around his neck. Neither Cloud nor Tifa spoke, but his eyes tell Tifa exactly how he feels.
Tifa is lying in a bed. There are wrinkles surrounding the familiar blue eyes. The same eyes she had looked into as a child, though back then, they would always dart away quickly. Now, they search her face, memorizing it. Tears fall from his eyes onto Tifa's cheeks.
A quick, shooting pain made Tifa wince and press a hand her forehead. Cloud was looking at her still. The look on his face, his words, the pain, and the vague sense that she was forgetting something – all of it left her feeling dazed.
She took a step back, shaking her head.
"Me?" she asked. "Why?"
Cloud and his child counterpart exchanged a look. In unison, they made a quintessential Cloud gesture of exasperation. A shake of the head accompanying widespread arms, palms open.
"Tifa," Child Cloud said. "Don't you remember how things were back then?
"I –" Tifa stuttered. "I'm sorry, but I don't know what you mean."
The Clouds looked at one another again. Tifa crossed her arms. She was beginning to feel outnumbered. The child stepped closer to her and patted her elbow.
"It's alright. You were going through a lot back then. It makes sense that you wouldn't remember."
He gave Tifa a small, understanding smile. A rare one, she realized. He must have been, what – eight or nine years old? Had Tifa ever seen Cloud smile at that age? Cloud had always been a shy child. But at some point, he used to smile at her all the time, she was sure of it.
"Back then…" Tifa said slowly.
Child Cloud nodded. "That's right. When we were kids."
Tifa thought back. Part of her resisted. There were things from her childhood that Tifa tried not to think about. Things that felt easier to forget. Cloud was not one of those things, but he was tied to them somehow.
A warm hand slipped into Tifa's, fingers interlacing with hers. She looked up, surprised. Cloud was not looking at her, but he moved closer so that their arms were touching. Tifa's heartrate slowed, though she had not noticed it had been going so fast. Why was she afraid?
"It's alright," Cloud said.
Another, smaller hand, slipped into Tifa's free one.
"Yeah, it's alright," Child Cloud echoed. "I'll show you what happened. We'll remember it together."
"Together," Tifa agreed.
Hands linked, they looked at the houses before them. Cloud's childhood home, cozy and small, where he and his mother had lived. Tifa's was right next to it.
"When we were little, we used to go back and forth all the time," Tifa remembered.
Cloud nodded. He squeezed her hand and the starry sky from that night at the water tower brightened. The sky cleared to a light blue, the same color as Cloud's eyes as a child. The sun was a cheery globe.
The door to Tifa's house opened and a small, dark-haired girl burst out, barefooted and alone. She skipped over to the next house and pounded on its door with both hands. A blond woman opened the door. She searched over the child's head for whoever had been knocking.
Another child poked his head out the door beneath her arm.
The little girl shouted with joy. Come on, Cloud! Catch me!
Before the woman could say anything, the boy slipped out the door and the two children were chasing one another around the water tower.
A panicked voice. Tifa!
The door to Tifa's house opened again and a woman with dark hair raced out.
It's okay, Thea. The blonde woman rushed forward to console her. Look, she's with Cloud.
Tifa's mother moved with a practiced speed as Tifa passed close to them. She caught her around the middle and scooped her into her arms. Tifa, love, you have to tell me if you want to go outside to play. Her voice was gentle but had an exaggerated patience that suggested she had said the words many times before.
Tifa wiggled in her arms. Let me go, Mom! We were runnin'.
Cloud joined them, standing by his mother and hugging her legs. She placed a hand on his head. Thea looked down at Cloud and sighed. Claudia, tell me five is easier than four.
Claudia laughed, as if it was a familiar joke between them. Cloud tugged at her dress. Mom, can me and Tifa play? At his question, Tifa went still in her mother's arms, listening with interest.
I can take them both for a while, Thea. Give you a bit of a break? Claudia smiled when Thea hesitated. It's alright. You had them yesterday after all.
Tifa had managed to flip upside down. She was folded in half, with her feet hanging by her head. Thea looked at Cloud, standing quietly by his mother with his cheek pressed against her legs. It hardly seems a fair trade, she said, tickling Tifa's sides and making her squeal.
But then she nodded. Alright, then. If you're sure. Thank you. She shifted Tifa upright and kissed her. Be good, now. Tifa hugged her around the neck hard. As soon as Thea sat her down, she ran off again.
Thea watched her go with a rueful smile. She reached over to tap Cloud on the nose. Watch out for my little troublemaker, will you? Cloud smiled shyly up at her before dashing off after Tifa.
The mothers and the children disappeared. Tifa realized how hard she was squeezing the hands on either side of her. She loosened her grip. Both Clouds were looking at her. She glanced up at the older one.
"I remember this. Playing together," she said. "But I don't remember being so bad."
Cloud shrugged. "Mom used to say you had spirit."
Tifa snorted at that, but then sobered. She had a hard time reconciling the strong-willed child she had seen chasing Cloud with the woman she had become. Cloud's memory of Tifa reminded her more of Yuffie or Aerith than herself.
"We used to play like this all the time," child Cloud said longingly. "Running around the water tower. Swimming in the river."
Tifa smiled at him. "That's right."
But then she frowned.
"It didn't stay that way, though, did it?"
At her words, child Cloud looked down at his feet. He seemed sad. The sky shifted above them, as if days were passing. Tifa's heart was pounding again.
"It didn't stay that way," he confirmed. "Do you remember what happened?"
Tifa thought of the woman in Cloud's memory. Her hair was dark and glossy. Her eyes were bright. She moved gracefully. The arms that lifted Tifa had been willowy, but strong. Her smile was something special. It made you feel safe. Loved.
She was healthy, vibrant.
Tifa still thought of her that way. She tried to. But it was not the only image that Tifa had of her mother when she remembered her.
"Mom got sick," Tifa said softly. "Really sick. And that's when everything changed."
The scene settled before them.
There were more people outside this time. A cluster of adults and children stood in front of Tifa's house. Cloud and his mother were in front of theirs. Off to the side. Set apart.
Tifa's father stood before them all, holding a bag. He was talking to Tifa in a level, reasonable tone, but the distress on his face was evident. Tifa was older, perhaps six or seven years old. Her arms were latched around her father's waist. Her face was red. She was making a scene.
I want to come too! Her father was trying to pry her arms off of him, though it clearly pained him to do so. Pumpkin, we talked about this, remember? Mom has to go away to get better. Just for a little while. Over Tifa's head, he passed the bag to a woman. You'll stay at Emilio's house.
The woman smiled down at Tifa. Won't that be nice? We'll have all the boys over to play. It'll be fun, you'll see. Tifa buried her face in her father's shirt, refusing to look at her. Her father looked up helplessly. He seemed to be on the verge of tears.
They were at a standstill when Claudia approached. She knelt to Tifa's level. Tifa, your father has to go now. The helicopter's waiting. Your mom is waiting for him too. She placed a hand on Tifa's head, stroking her hair. She'll be back before you know it, and we can tell her how brave you've been.
Tifa sniffed. She allowed Claudia to take her hand and pull her gently from her father. He kissed Tifa on the head. I love you, pumpkin. And then he was gone.
The woman holding Tifa's bag cleared her throat. Come along, Tifa! But Tifa did not move. She clung to Claudia's arm with both hands. Can't I stay here with you and Cloud? Her voice was barely a whisper.
Claudia shook her head, but the other woman was already answering. Your father already arranged everything, dear! Remember, we have a room all set up, just for you. Though her tone was friendly, the look on her face as she glanced at Claudia was not.
Tifa's grip on Claudia slackened. The fight seemed to have left her. She allowed the other woman to lead her away. Claudia walked back toward the house, where Cloud was standing. He looked so small. She put an arm around his shoulders. You'll see Tifa soon, she reassured him.
Child Cloud dropped Tifa's hand and walked over to Claudia. He was slightly older than the version of himself currently tucked under his mother's arm, but he walked into him, and they merged together. Tifa saw them as one.
He looked up at his mother, then back to Tifa. His small face was distraught.
"Tifa was sad," he said. "And mom was too."
Tifa studied Claudia's face. She was watching the retreating group of parents and children, that clearly, she was not a part of. There was a loud whirring overhead. She lifted her face to watch the helicopter rise above the village.
Claudia's lips trembled, but then she pressed them together firmly. There was a stoic look on her face that reminded Tifa so much of Cloud that it made her ache.
Tifa thought about things that she had never considered as a child. The way Cloud's home, which had always seemed inviting and warm to Tifa, was much smaller than the other houses in the village. Claudia, herself. How she was pretty and younger than the other mothers. And the others only ever whispered about Cloud's father.
Child Cloud wrapped his arms around his mother's waist. He looked at Tifa with huge, imploring eyes.
"I didn't understand what was happening," he told Tifa. "I didn't know what to do."
Tears sprung to Tifa's eyes. For Claudia. For Cloud. For her mom. And for herself.
She turned her head to address, not the child before her, but the man at her side. Cloud was watching his mother and his younger self with a lost look on his face. Tifa touched his cheek with light fingertips, turning his face toward her.
"You weren't supposed to know what to do," she told him. "You were only a child."
Cloud's eyes flashed with pain. Tifa felt his sudden surge of self-loathing as if it were her own. It hit Tifa like a punch to the gut. He turned his head away, not ready to accept her words. Tifa dropped her hand.
"I wanted to help. To make things better," he explained, voice bitter. "But I only made things worse."
Child Cloud let go of his mother and came over to them.
He grabbed Tifa's arm, pointing. "Look, over there."
On the other side of the water tower, in front of the General Store, there were children playing a chasing game. They tagged one another and yelled, You're it! Three of them were rowdy, rambunctious boys. The other two were Tifa and Cloud.
Tifa watched herself. She laughed when she was supposed to. Ran when it was her turn. But her feet dragged in the dirt. Tifa had always been a fast runner. On this day, she was slow.
When the other children were not looking, Tifa leaned against the water tower. She looked up the sky as if searching for something. For a moment, it seemed as if she might cry.
Only one of the children noticed that she was no longer playing. He stopped running to watch her. Cloud. He seemed frozen, like he wanted to approach her but was afraid to try.
A blurred figure dashed between them. A running child, his arm stretched out. He hit Tifa with an open palm as he raced past. Ha! Got you, Tifa! You're it now! Tifa had not seen him coming. The momentum caused her to stumble away from the water tower, nearly falling in the dirt.
Cloud unfroze. He charged at the other boy and shoved him hard with both hands. The boy fell. The water tower is base! Cloud was yelling. Tifa was safe! The boy shouted back at him, startled at the intensity of his anger. You have to touch base with both hands. It's the rules!
Another boy ran over and pushed Cloud from behind. Suddenly all three of them were on the ground. Fists started flying. The last boy looked on, as if considering joining, but then dashed into the General Store instead.
Tifa watched anxiously as they fought. Stop it you guys! The tears that she had been holding back spilled over.
Adults came out of the nearby store. A woman rushed over and put an arm around Tifa's shoulders. Men pulled the boys apart. That's enough! Emilio! Taylor! One man held each boy by the collar of their shirts. Another had Cloud by the arm.
Who started this? The man's voice was loud and stern. Without hesitation, the other boys pointed their fingers at Cloud. He yanked his arm away from the man holding it. His lip was bleeding and his face was still angry. He seemed ready to start yelling again.
But then, something caught his eye. The woman had picked Tifa up and was carrying her back inside. Tifa's face was buried in the woman's shoulder. She was crying. A hand fell on Cloud's shoulder. Come on, now. It's time for you to go home.
The memory ended there.
"That was my first fight," child Cloud said.
Cloud scoffed. "But not the last."
Tifa nodded, her throat too tight to speak. She remembered. They watched together as days, weeks passed before their eyes in snippets of memories.
Children played outside. Among them, a consistent foursome formed. Tifa, Emilio, Taylor, and Lester.
"Mom came back, but she wasn't better." Tifa whispered the words without taking her eyes off the children. "Dad would send me to Emilio's house when Mom had bad days or when they went away again."
The boys were over at Emilio's all the time. Tifa was absorbed into their group. They became inseparable. Tifa grew more animated, following along with whatever the other children were doing. Though she seemed to be doing better, she was a far cry from the spirited child they had seen before.
"I thought if I played along and acted happy, then I wouldn't feel so sad." Tifa recounted. "Everyone said I needed to put on a brave face for mom. It worked, but only a little."
Cloud was there among the children too, though he rarely joined their play. When he did, fights would almost always break out. Usually, he was the one to instigate. Tifa watched him swing at Emilio, though she did not catch what had triggered the fight.
"I kept getting in trouble. I kept getting in fights."
A small voice piped up at Tifa's side. Tifa looked down at the child next to her.
He shrugged. "Mom would ask me why, but I didn't really know."
On her other side, Cloud took a step forward. He was frowning, lost in thought.
"Everything was changing," he said slowly. "It felt good to be angry. Easier, I guess."
Before them, Cloud moved increasingly toward the outskirts of the group. Tifa occasionally called out to him, but he avoided her. After all, she was always with the other boys. And Cloud and the other boys did not get along.
"I thought they all were so stupid. Always laughing at every little thing!"
Cloud and Tifa both looked down at the child next to Tifa, the source of the outburst. His fists were clenched at his sides, and he glared at the memory of the other boys.
"We were just being kids," Tifa said gently.
The child walked over to stand next to Cloud. He looked up at him, his face angry and confused. Cloud glanced at him, then over to Tifa. He spoke for them both.
"I know," he replied. "I was the one being stupid. I told myself I was different, that I was better than the other boys. But really…"
Child Cloud looked at Tifa too now.
"I wished that I could be friends with them too," he whispered, the anger gone from his small face.
Cloud shook his head. "I was jealous. Everything seemed so easy for them."
They looked on at the memory of Cloud watching the four children playing together from a distance. Tifa thought she understood was he was saying. Emilio, Lester, and Taylor were uncomplicated children.
"Their big houses. The way their dads were all friends with one another, and Tifa's dad. They were taller than me. Faster and stronger too…"
He tapered off as Lester dangled upside down from the underside of the water tower, making a silly face. His shirt fell over his face, and Emilio tugged it off, tossing it to Taylor. They started a game of keep away while Lester covered his chest, feigning embarrassment.
Don't look at me! Lester screeched it in a high-pitched, girlish voice at Tifa. She giggled and playfully covered her eyes.
"And they always seemed to know how to make Tifa smile," Cloud finished in a soft voice.
With that, the memory of the children dissolved.
They were quiet as a new day dawned around them. On this day, no children laughed or played outside. It was cloudy, casting darkness on the village, even though it was daytime. The village had a somber feel to it.
"Everything was the same for a while." Child Cloud's quiet voice broke the heavy silence. "But then, this day happened. The worst day."
Tifa shivered. "This was the day…"
"…Tifa's mom," Cloud whispered.
She could feel both Clouds watching her, but Tifa's eyes were fixed on her childhood home. Its windows were dark. Tifa felt simultaneously compelled towards it and repelled away. Though parts of this day were blurry, it was branded into Tifa's being.
"This was the day Mom died."