Kim Burgess was sitting alone in the hallway of the DCFS offices. Her appointment with her adoption officer was running late and she was becoming impatient. She reshuffled her paperwork as she tried to ignore the fact that the only other people waiting in the hallway were a husband and wife across from her. And there she sat, alone.

But it would be okay.

She had Makayla. And Makayla had her. That was all they needed now. They would make do. They would be okay.

The clock on the wall sounded extra loud as the minutes ticked by.

Not for the first time, Kim worried about it all. About how fit she was to be a mother to Makayla when the little girl had been through so much. How she could do it alone. How she was white and would never truly understand the problems Makayla would have to face in the world. How…

The door opened, interrupting Kim's panicking and a woman in a suit popped her head out, "Guardians of Makayla?"

"That's me." Kim stood up on cue and could feel the stare of the woman drifting around her as if looking for another guardian. She tried to ignore the loneliness hovering around her and walked toward the office.

"Of course." Kim was sure the woman was giving her a fake smile in return and let her in.

Kim sat down in one of the two chairs. The woman talked Kim through all the paperwork that they were putting through. Kim handed over the documents she had brought with her, character references, pay slips, deeds of her apartment and the rest. The meeting went by quickly, a blur of signatures and taking notes.

"Okay." The case worker said, shuffling papers, "To finalize the adoption before we present it to a judge, we just need you to name another guardian."

"Excuse me?" Kim asked, she had been told that she could adopt Makayla as a single mother under the circumstances of what Makayla had been through and the unique position that Kim was in as the only adult that the little girl trusted.

"You will be Makayla's sole guardian." The woman clarified, "But we need a second guardian in name, a next of kin of sorts, in case anything were to happen to you. Usually people pick close family or friends or someone known to the child."

Kim hesitated, the pen in her hand hovering over the blank space on the page in front of her. "Can I think about it?"

The woman's face softened, "Of course. But we will need it as soon as possible to put the rest of the paperwork through. If you could have a name and their signature of consent within a few days we can get your case to the judge this week and Makayla will officially be in your permeant custody."

Kim nodded vaguely, collected her belongings and was just leaving the room when the next couple were called. She was just another number in the system but now she had an incredibly personal decision to make.

Her drive back to work was filled with a haze of questions in her mind. She had to choose someone to be there for Makayla. To look after the little girl if the worst happened to her. To be her family. To be able to take care of her problems and deal with the trauma she had been through. She had to choose someone she could trust.

The obvious choice was Nicole, but with her promotion in work, her sister had packed up her life and moved to Europe, partly as a new start from her own trauma and Zoe had never really been happy in her schools so far. The decision had been quick, breaking Kim's heart. But with the Atlantic Ocean between them, she couldn't really choose someone that Makayla would only meet once every few years and she wouldn't expect her sister to uproot her life and move back to the city that had caused her so much pain.

Kim's second choice was the first person that she saw when she entered the District building. Trudy Platt was an amazing Sergeant, cop and woman. And she was also the best mentor and friend that Kim could ever have hoped for. She delayed going upstairs and back to work and instead bit the bullet and came straight out and asked Trudy if she would be the second guardian.

"Kim." Trudy sighed and her face softened from her usual Sergeant mask to that of a concerned friend. "I will love that girl like she's the granddaughter I've never had. But I just can't be that person she needs. The person that you need. Randy and I are getting too old to be all she would need us to be."

Kim understood. She also bit back a happy tear or two at Trudy's unsaid implication that Kim was like a daughter to her. But it left her stuck.

Vanessa filled in Kim on where they had gotten with their current case from where she sat at the other side of their shared desks as partners. Vanessa Rojas was good police and a good partner but Kim didn't know her long enough for her to justify putting the young woman in the position.

She glanced across at Kevin. Her next choice.

It made sense to ask him; he was her best friend and the person that she had known the longest. Plus, realistically, he would be in the position to understand some of what Makayla would go through. Kim cornered him the next chance she got in the break room.

Kevin considered her question, resting back against the counter top. "She's a great kid. And you know I've always got you Kim."

Kim could feel the rejection coming. "But?"

"But…I got a lot on my plate now. I've got all these eyes on me, looking to jam me up right now. And I got Jordan and Vanessa to think about. I'll be there for you and her always but I just can't sign those papers right now Kim, I don't think I could be what Makayla would need. I'm so sor-" He went to apologise but Kim interrupted him with a hug. She knew it was a lot to ask and even more to turn down. Kevin would do anything for her but if he felt like he couldn't do it, the last thing she wanted to do was pressurize him.

Kevin went back to work and Kim went about getting herself a coffee. Contemplating her options. Eventually, she moved to the doorway to survey the room like she was trying to pick out suspects.

Voight was giving out instructions for their next operation and Kim was only half listening. She would have been a pretty lousy cop if she didn't notice the atmosphere between Adam and Hailey. Their chairs, usually back to back were now side to side and just that little bit too close to be platonic. Interesting. She knew they had had a thing but maybe it was reigniting?

She moved her gaze as Voight went to point at something on the board and caught Jay's gaze. He quickly moved his eyes between her and to Hailey and Adam and back with a barely there quirk of the corner of his mouth.

Ah. So he saw it too.

It made sense, Kim mused, they had both been in work relationships they had tried to keep secret before, they were ideally placed to know the signs.

After Voight finished and returned to his office, she threw all caution to the wind and followed him in, closing the door behind her. He looked up in surprise. "Did everything go okay at DCFS earlier?" He asked.

He had sat her down, when she had mentioned adoption and they talked through it all. He was concerned about how much she was taking on but Kim knew he was happy for her. And the Unit was family, he looked after them. She was hoping he would take care of one more.

So she asked him the question. He didn't answer straight away. He did that usual thing he did when mulling something over, working his jaw, rocking back on his chair and staring her down.

"No."

That took the wind out of her sails. "Oh."

"You know that you, and Makayla, are family. Don't ever doubt that. Ever." Voight told her, "But I've seen too much darkness to be someone that that little girl could look up to. I tried my best with Justin and Erin and looked how that all turned out. I won't do that to Makayla."

It broke Kim's heart to hear Voight say such things about himself, but he did know himself better than anyone. "Sarge, you're…"

He held up his hand to stop her from defending his character, he smiled, "Thank you Kim but I'm sorry I can't sign those papers. That doesn't mean Makayla is any less important to me, if anything it just makes her more important. God forbid you were to ever have to rely on someone else to take care of her. I would be looking over their shoulder all the damn time."

The rest of the day crawled past, hours ticking by, reminding her that she still hadn't found anyone. By the end of the day, she was sitting in the locker room, tying her laces and Adam was packing up for the day.

Adam.

There was a lot of history there. But they had finally got to somewhere good. Somewhere so that they could be friends and not be each other's late night calls. They had finally gotten to break the final lingering strings from their engagement and whatever the hell afterwards had been.

They were good. And they could trust each other with their lives. And without a doubt she would trust him with Makayla. But she wouldn't do that to him. He didn't need to pick up the baggage they had taken so long to let go of.

That was why when Hailey popped her head in the door, that Kim couldn't ask her either. Hailey, her most solid female friend since becoming a cop and someone that Kim loved dearly and trusted.

She couldn't ask either Adam or Hailey to give up whatever spark was between them to have to discuss having a more prominent role in Kim and Makayla's lives. She bid them both goodnight as they left.

That left her with the one person that she hadn't even considered that morning. Her long shot. She didn't even know why she sent the text. But it was her last chance. She prepared herself for the inevitable no and wondered what the hell she was going to do next.

"Sure thing Kim." Jay texted back about meeting her at Molly's in an hour.

Kim tried to ignore the fact that before now she had never even used his number for personal reasons before. She started to panic about the fact that she didn't really know Jay at all.

Sure they were colleagues and friendly and always had each other's back but she wasn't close to him like she was to the rest of the unit.

After arranging for Monica, Cindy Herrmann's sister that was Makayla's babysitter, to stay on an extra hour, Kim made her way to Molly's. She figured that Molly's was a good neutral place to meet Jay.

So Kim sat in the back of the bar at a table for two, worrying about everything until she saw Jay walk in. His eyes scanned the room until they found her and he nodded a hello as he made his way straight to her.

She tried to remind herself of her last minute list she had made as to why Jay would be a good candidate to ask.

He was honest and trustworthy. He understood trauma probably better than anyone in their unit. He could be very funny. He had no attachments that she knew of. He was a good guy. Plain and simple.

"Hey Kim." He said, sitting down opposite her.

"Hey Jay." She said, nerves filtering into her voice.

"Is everything okay?" He sounded nervous in his own way. It wasn't like they had ever hung out alone before. He glanced around the room as if scanning for a visible threat. Kim assumed he thought there was a work problem or that she was in danger.

"No, everything is okay."

"Is Makayla okay?" He jumped to his next conclusion and it warmed her heart. That despite not being personally close, they were still part of the same family and the courtesy already extended to her little girl.

"She's…" There were still night terrors and there was a lot of things they would have to work through but Kim remained hopeful. "She's good right now. Thanks."

She could see the relief flood him, there was no immediate danger and the tension in his shoulders disappeared.

"But I actually have something to ask you." She said, clutching her glass of water in her hands with enough force to turn her knuckles white while she tried to remain looking nonchalant.

"Okay, what is it?" He asked with genuine curiosity.

"I need to name a second legal guardian for Makayla. They would have to be someone she would know. Somebody that would take on custody of her if the worst was to happen to me."

"Okay, that makes sense." He said, "She's been through enough trauma and upheaval already, she would need another constant in her life and in our line of work, the worst is not impossible." He said. "Do you want me to background check someone for you?" He leaned his arms on the table, as if ready to get to work.

"What?"

"Isn't that what you wanted to ask me?"

"No." She shook her head, this was worse now that he didn't even consider himself a possibility. Though in his defence, Kim hadn't considered him this morning either. But here they were. She had to take a chance. "Jay, I actually wanted to ask you if you would consider being Makayla's second legal guardian…"

"Oh." He blinked as if he had heard her wrong but didn't want to ask her to repeat the question.

Kim nodded as she watched him. Watched him sit back and rub his hand across his mouth. Watched as he moved back in his seat and then moved forward again. Restless as he contemplated her question.

Kim knew there was only one answer she was going to get. She had prepared for various answers, for an incredulous laugh at the audacity of her to ask him, him literally running for the door, for him to try and give a long list of reasons why he couldn't.

He didn't answer straight away like everyone else but answered with a question of his own. "Why me?"

It was a logical question. One she felt terrible answering.

"Because I've asked Trudy, and Kevin, and Voight and I don't want to ask Adam or Hailey. This sounds terrible, I know it makes you my last choice but…"

"Kim." He interrupted her with a soft smile. "I get it, I would have been more worried about your mental state if you had come to me first. We're not exactly as close as say you and Kev right? No offence taken. And this isn't really about us, it's about choosing someone you can trust with Makayla. So I'm honoured that I'm considered at all, really."

Kim sighed a breath of relief, "Okay. I just need someone that I can trust and I do trust you Jay. But really it would just be a signature, hopefully you'd never have much to do with Makayla. I would rather you than some cousin I have to get in touch with. I trust you with my life and I'd trust you with Makayla's."

"That's the thing Kim, it's her life."

"I know. It's a lot to ask of anybody and…"

"Yes, I'll do it."

The moment his answer left his mouth, he looked as surprised as she felt.

"What?"

"That girl has been through too much. She's seen things nobody should see, I get that. You need help and you both are family. I'll sign it."

Kim let out a breath that she didn't notice she had been holding. "Really?"

"Yeah. But on one condition."

"Anything."

"I'd like to spend some time with you and her, if you're both okay with that. I wouldn't like to be a stranger to her. And I think it's about time me and you got to know each other Burgess."