Author's Note: Well folks, this is the end. It was hard to reach it for me, my mind was not agreeing with me and now my body isn't working right. I love the idea that we who are broken can make others whole with our brokenness. If you are in need of mental healthcare, do not be afraid to be your own advocate and seek the help you need. It is just one way to take care of yourself. I take medicines daily to keep me healthy. I brush my teeth. I drink plenty of water. I journal and talk with someone to keep my deamons at bay. It's all health related and it's as important to eat healthy foods. Thank you for reading, for those who have reviewed and for your unending support.

As for future writing, I'm not sure I will be. I will continue to slowly tell the story of Anwen and Sirius, but I have other irons in my writing fire. I hope you will follow me into my published works. I will let you know. Again, thank you for being with me through this story. MNF

Chapter 32:

Endings, Beginnings and Yuletide Carols

17 December 1994

Harry and Hermione strolled through Muggle London. Sirius had taken Amy shopping before they were going to King's Cross Station to pick up Susan and Hannah from the Hogwarts express. It was a usual winter day in London, rainy, cold and very wet. Hermione had on her wellies, green with yellow daisies, that went well with the yellow peacoat and white scarf, hat, and mittens. She was only wearing the right one as her left hand was snuggled into Harry's mitten and holding his hand.

Normally Harry wouldn't wear mittens, but Hermione couldn't squeeze her hand into his and then they had to make do with holding hands through gloves, which was wholly unsatisfying. Sirius had taken him shopping, again, only a week before to purchase the warm wool coat he was wearing now. It was a midnight blue, went to his ankles and his dad had charmed it to be impervious to weather. He'd done the same for Hermione's coat when she'd complained she was feeling the wet through it.

Harry bared little resemblance to the boy he'd been only a year ago. A significant growth spurt had added nearly six inches to his height and two stone to his weight. His hair was longer, and he often wore it in a low ponytail with a thin leather strap holding it near the nape of his neck. Gone were the odd angles of hair that had once erupted across his head. He also no longer wore glasses, so his green eyes popped even more. His scar was barely noticeable, only there when the light hit it correctly.

Harry was allowed to carry his wand, although Sirius and Remus begged him not to use it. While Harry was less overcharged than he'd been over the summer, some of his spells were still wonky. His Patronus Charm was huge, and Harry's dad and uncle thought it might always be so. It was something Harry was extremely proud of, and it was powered by thoughts of Hermione, so they weren't surprised by it. Apparently, James' had been the same way when he thought of Lily.

"Hurry up, you slow pokes," Sirius yelled over his shoulder as he and Amy were about to enter the station. "We don't want to be late."

"Coming," the pair said in unison as they jogged the few steps to catch up. The station was a bustling mass of humanity, although Harry thought it could be worse and they could be here on Christmas Eve. Harry watches his dad and his wife slide through the passage to platform 9 ¾, and he then repeated the action, not letting Hermione's hand go, regardless of how much she tried to wiggle free.

"That could have been disastrous," Hermione said.

"But it wasn't. Come on, I want to see Fred and George if I can," Harry replied, already searching for the tall redheads.

"They've done alright this year with the team and all?" Hermione asked.

"Won their first game, but it was against Slytherin who are in worse shape than Gryffindor." Harry saw the Weasley twins and their brother Bill moving towards them, so he waved. Bill had already stopped to greet Sirius.

"Hey guys, good to see you," Harry said as he finally released Hermione's hand and went to shake Bill's and then the twins. "You here to wrangle Ron?" Harry asked Bill.

"No," he said slowly. "He's back at rehab. There was an incident with a girl, someone named Cho something, who he asked to the Holiday Ball. She said no, that she already had a date but he wouldn't leave her alone. She's dating Cedric Diggory, who's a neighbour. He wrote home to his dad about it, and Dad went and picked Ron up and put him in very much against Ron's will. I don't know if we will ever undo what that woman did to him and Gin."

"She's no better?" Hermione asked.

"No, and…look this isn't the best place to discuss it. Why don't you drop by the new house, and we can have tea, yeah?"

"Your father had already invited us all tomorrow afternoon. We can talk then," Sirius said. "I'm making cake." Harry groaned.

"He's not making cake, I'm making cake," Amy corrected. "He can sit in the kitchen while I bake."

"Head of the DMLE taking a day off?" Bill asked surprised.

"No, the Head of the DMLE is taking a whole week off. I want to enjoy my first married Christmas," Amy said happily.

"Well, bravo. Good things should be celebrated. The unsaid rest of the sentence, that bad things should be forgotten echoed in Harry's ears. It had been a very bad year for the Weasleys.

Susan and Hannah came up, Neville and Terry in tow. The girls hugged Amy and Hannah hugged Sirius, Harry and Hermione too. "Where are your trunks?" Amy asked.

"I shrunk them and they're in my pocket," Neville said. With Sirius's tutoring and his new wand, Neville had found his confidence and was competing with Harry and Hermione to see who would get the new spell the quickest. Harry had the raw talent and power; Hermione knew the theory on everything, but Neville was a strong mix of the two."

"Congrats, Neville. That's a sixth-year spell," Bill remarked.

"Well, we have an excellent tutor and I need to keep up with these two," Neville said. "Anyway, I want to take my OWLs this year, because Sirius is talking about some trips over the summer that we'd take instead of classes. Egypt is one of them."

"I know, you'll be staying in my flat while you're there," Bill said and the trio who stayed back from Hogwarts nodded excitedly. "Well, we need to get home. Charlie is coming in for the week and then I need to get back to Gringotts. See you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow," everyone responded save Hannah, Terry and Susan.

"What's going on tomorrow?" Hannah asked brightly. She was spending a few days with Susan before heading home. Terry was coming over on Boxing Day and staying through to New Years.

"We're going to the Weasleys for tea," Amy announced. "I'm making cake, but I need you to help me pick a sponge."

"Can I help too?" Hannah asked. "I love baking."

"Of course."

"Good, you can take my place," Susan said dourly. "Can we please be leaving?"

"Of course," Sirius said. "We can Floo home from over there."

BB* BB* BB* BB* BB

Susan begged off tea with the Weasleys but was upset when Hannah chose to go with Neville and his gran, as the invitation had been for all of them. Harry, Sirius, Amy, Hermione and her mother accompanied the others and had a wonderful time talking about the future. It was decided that Ron would be moving to Canada to live with a squib cousin of Arthur's who had left the UK during the first war, once he was out of rehab. The magical world seemed to be toxic for Ron, so Arthur hoped the non-magical would be better for him. He wouldn't remember he had once had magic.

It seemed Hogwarts was just not the place for Ron to be. He got into trouble by having a friend brew him the Wit-Enhancing Potion while at school. Unfortunately, it acted in the brain much like the potions his mother had brewed him, and he was having to start back at square one with being detoxed.

"Not the holiday I was expecting to have," Arthur said as he talked privately with Sirius. "Honestly, you don't need to be paying for the children's treatments. That woman is the one who poisoned them."

"We are family, and the Ministry gave me all this money for wrongly imprisoning me. I have the Black family fortune as well, I'd rather share it," Sirius explained.

"You will have children of your own, not just Harry. You should save some for them," Arthur pleaded.

"My children will be plenty wealthy," Sirius replied. "Please, let me help."

"Thank you."

"Now, what are your plans for Christmas Day? Remus has practiced cooking a turkey, twice, this month and we have two elves. Come, Neville and his gran will be there as will the Graingers. You need to see the house; the renovations were finished just last week, and the boys and I cut down the largest tree I've seen outside of my years at school. It's going to be a joyous day, our family all together."

"I was just going to make a small meal here for the five boys and me," Arthur confessed. "We don't feel much life celebrating."

"I know," Sirius said gently, putting a hand on the man's shoulder. "It will be my first real Christmas without James and Lily. I keep thinking the pain of their loss will get easier, but there are days when I wake up and my heart feels like it's in a vice. I would trade everything, everything I have – except Harry – to have them back."

"You do understand," Arthur said solemnly. "We'll join you. What time?"

"Come over around three," Sirius said and directed the man back to the gathering where Amy and Augusta were talking animatedly about something, and the kids were playing an uproarious game of Exploding Snap. Even Bill looked younger and happier than he had when Sirius had seen him over the past several months. The Weasleys may weather this storm, Arthur thought, and it will only be because of our friends.

BB*BB*BB*BB*BB

Harry found Susan staring at the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve afternoon. The house was quiet, Harry wasn't even sure where everyone else was. He was going to make the dinner in a few hours and then had agreed to go to midnight worship with Hermione and her family at the local Church of England parish.

"You haven't seemed happy lately, Susan. What's going on?" Harry asked her as he sat down next to her.

"When I was growing up, Auntie never had time for me. I saw Hannah and her mother more than I saw her. Now, she has time for you and Sirius and… I feel left out."

"Hmm, that must be difficult to deal with," Harry said thoughtfully. "That said, choosing to stay home or in your room isn't a good way to spend more time with your aunt."

"I just…it's not fair." Harry wrapped his arm around Susan's shoulders.

"Yeah, well life isn't fair. It's something my mind healer tells me all the time. If life were fair, my mother and father wouldn't have died. If life were fair, I wouldn't have been treated like a slave by my aunt and uncle. If life were fair, dad wouldn't have been thrown in Azkaban. If life were fair, Remus wouldn't have been bitten by a werewolf because Mr Lupin said something that Greyback didn't like. And, if life were fair, you wouldn't have lost your parents either. No one ever promised that life would be fair."

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Sunday said glumly.

"However, Phillip says what we can make fair is how we deal with what life gives us. My past was horrible. I can't do anything about that now. I could choose to wallow and become super angsty, but I don't think anyone would put up with me then. I decided to leave my past behind me and look forward. I have a dad now who loves me and wants what's best for me. I have an uncle who is an amazing tutor and with whom I am learning more and faster than I thought possible. I'm enjoying my life now."

"So, you just forget it all? All the bad stuff that happened?"

"I haven't forgotten," Harry said, "my nightmares are a testament to that; but they happen less often, and Phillip said they'll end someday. No, I just choose to let all of it be. He's taught me some Occlumency exercises that let me pack everything away so it's not in the forefront of my mind. I have better things to focus my attention on now."

"Like Hermione?" Susan teased.

"Yes, for starters, but not just her. This house is awesome, and I have my own room. I have a true friend in Neville and even people like you, Hannah and Terry. Bill Weasley thinks I could go into enchanting or curse-breaking and is willing to have me visit over the summer so I can see how both are used in the field."

"Wow, I thought you wanted to be an Auror, like Auntie."

"That was Ron's dream, not mine. I might have gone along, but I don't think I would have been happy. I've had enough with dark wizards." Susan let out a little giggle.

"Yes, you have."

"Lay off the anti-social, Susan, and cut your aunt some slack. She's doing the best for herself and what's best for you too. I think you'll like your life a lot more if you do." Harry got up and offered Susan his hand. "I need to bake some more ginger biscuits because dad ate all the ones I made two days ago, and then I need to get the roast into the oven. Care to help?"

"Sure," she said. "Too bad Hannah isn't here; she really is a genius in the kitchen." Harry nodded and the two went off toward the kitchen. A moment later Sirius stepped out from behind the tree where he had been re-arranging ornaments before the kids had come in. He knew he should have announced himself, but things became serious quickly and he didn't want to disturb them. He couldn't be prouder of Harry if he'd won the Quidditch World Cup.

Their lives had come so far, in such a short time. Sirius had a peace within him that he'd never felt; he could see it in his son as well. They hadn't told anyone yet, but Amy was growing a little sister or brother for Harry and Susan. They'd tell everyone at dinner tonight. He'd be a father of two by midsummer celebrations. Really, he felt like their family already had four children as Hermione and Neville were his as well. They'd made a family of people who were lonely and broken without each other.

Sirius thought of his best friend and his wife and thanked them for all they may or may not have manipulated from the great beyond, he wasn't sure if you could do such things when you crossed over. Happy and content, he went looking for his wife to tell her just how wonderful he felt in this moment.

THE END