Hey Everyone! Hope you are doing alright! I got the inspiration to write this, and it wouldn't leave me alone so here we are. Hope you all enjoy it! Word of warning, I tried to proof read it, but I was pretty tired, so forgiveness for grammatical errors may be necessary. Enjoy! Lots of Love - Lorna :)
"Jay don't-" Batman growled, but something in it made the figure stop. He took a step forward, trying in vain to reach out to his lost son. "You can fight this, Jason. I know you can."
Hood snapped.
"Maybe I don't want too."
He swung a violent punch at Batman's face, followed by a roll that got him out of the way when Bruce efficiently avoided it. That was fine, he had expected this. Tim, however, had not because he had failed to get out of the way as Jason swung his leg in a wide kick. It brought the teen to the ground with a harsh thump and a curse. Damien rushed forward to protect his fallen brother, landing a single hit on his older brother before Jason grabbed his arm and threw him promptly to the side. Damien hissed but bounced back up with vigor. Dick brought him down with a hard kick to his back.
Pain shot through his spine, but not the severe pain he had expected. They were going easy, lightening their punches, trying not to hurt him. He hated that. He hated them.
Without thinking, he reached down, grabbed the knives he kept hidden in his boot, and threw them as he sat up. It forced Dick and Damien to back away; the former got himself impaled in the arm, saving Damien from a knife in the neck.
"Grayson!"
"Jace, stop please." Tim begged. He blocked a punch that Jason threw at him. "I know you're trying, but we can't—we can't bring you back home like this."
Jason growled. "I don't have one anyway."
He kicked the kids knees when he didn't expect it. He could hear the yelp of pain as Tim collapsed. He didn't know if his knee had dislocated or broken and he did not care. He went for the end strike, the knockout punch and Dick stopped him with a bloody hand on his fist and a couple hard jabs to his ribs. Bones bent, and a few might even have broken, but he didn't notice the pain. He ripped his hand away from Dick, hearing the unclipping of something behind him. He restrained Dicks arm in a hard lock, digging his fingers into the injured flesh of Dick's arm. Impressively Dick doesn't flinch, doing some acrobatic move that somehow managed to break the grip and twist Jason down, arm pinned behind his back. Jason winced but this could still work. He went limp in Dick's hand, fully dislocating his shoulder as he fell. The pain and sudden loss of control was aggravating, but it did what he wanted. Dick tipped forward with him, trying to hold him up and his grip on Jason loosen somewhat as the rest of his arm went to support the sudden weight.
He twisted out of his grasp rolling behind Dick, which was painful but necessary for him to get the other into the same armlock, using him as a human shield as several electric bubbles hit the original Robin. He grunted in pain and collapsed, which Jason allowed him to do. It was a mercy he didn't know why he granted.
The electrocution shocked Dick, who spasmed painfully on the rooftop. Jason gave Batman a cocky grin, while Damien ran between his brothers, trying to protect them from Jason.
"Todd, you're being controlled; these aren't your thoughts. Stop, and Father can help you."
"He's not my father." Jason snapped. Lunging toward Robin with speed that was unbecoming of his injuries, Jason was stopped by a brutal kick to his already abused ribs from Batman. If they hadn't been snapped before, they definitely were now. Jason stepped back toward Dick, still grunting as electric shocks tore their way through him, still clinging to consciousness. He needed Dick to be out of the way and those stupid things weren't going to last forever. Dick would either find a way out of it, or they would stop. They weren't meant to kill.
Batman tried, he really did try, to make it in time to save Dick, but Jason threw another knife, taken from his dear brothers suit and chucked it straight at Tim, who was unable to move with his leg as mangled as it was. Bruce had to dive to stop the dagger from impaling his other son as Damien rushed forward to try to protect his older brother. It was no use, Jason was much faster. Dick received a nasty punch to the face, knocking him unconscious for the foreseeable future and leaving a definite concussion in its wake.
Damien cried out as he watched his brother fall silent. The electric shock finally waning after they noted the victim was unconscious.
He threw several set of acrobatic kicks and punches, many landing on Jason given they he was unable to use one of his hands very effectively. Mostly he took the hits until he saw an opening.
Gabbing Damien by the hand, twisting it and kneeing him in the stomach, he picked up the young boy and dragged him to the side of the building, dangling him from several stories in the air.
"Drop your d*mn weapons. Now."
Batman lowered his batarang and several different devices. He left his grappling hook, and Jason allowed that given the child he was dangling over a rooftop and handcuffs. Those couldn't do anything to him anyway.
"Put him down, Jason. Damien is your brother."
"Uhuh." Jason takes. "Step back."
Batman conceded.
Damien was struggling, and it was making it very difficult to keep a good grip on the young ones hands as he threatened to toss him off a building. Inconsiderate honestly.
"I'll give him back, but you're not going to follow me. Roll me one of the smoke bombs."
He did so without hesitation and Jason caught it with his foot, ready to step on it and activate it.
"Todd. You don't want to do this."
Sh*t the kid was determined.
The kid looked at him, eyes so serious on the face of such a a young child. "I won't be the reason you don't make it home. Father…"
"Damien don't."
Without listening, Damien took one of the electric bubbles, that Jason hadn't even seen him snatch off of Grayson limp form. He activated it on himself, and by extensions he shocked Jay, who let him go in a panic.
"Demon fool." He spit, but that was not the end of Damien's master plan. Without realizing it, in his panic to avoid being shocked, Jason had stepped on the smoke bomb.
The entire rooftop was bathed in smoke. Then he was being lunged at and without thinking, to avoid Batman's outreached fingers, he jumped off the building. Batman followed, grabbing him by the collar and they twisted mid air. Jason fought and bit and kicked and just raged. He couldn't see Batman flinch, but he was certain it hurt. Batman, ever focused, somehow managed to get cuffs around him mid air. Jason still couldn't quite figure out how he had done that.
Didn't matter though, the were approaching the dingy ground of an abandoned alley all too quickly. Batman wrapped himself around Todd. Pulling him against his chest as they fell, they hit some ledge and Bruce grunted at the impact, softened only somewhat by the grappling hook not meant to take both their weights, they continued to tumble and Bruce landed with a loud boom on the floor. Without all his armor he'd have been a pancake, even now, it would be a long week of bruised ribs. Jason landed on top of him with a grunt.
Despite the pain, Batman knew he had to be quick. He flipped himself over, trapping Jason underneath him. He hurt, watching how painful it was for his son to move his dislocated arm, especially trapped on the other side of his body, only exasperating the injury. Jason was twitching and fighting, but there was blood leaking out of his mouth and his hands were trapped in cuffs, though not for long.
"I'm sorry, Jace." Bruce whispered. Jason watched him pull something out of his pocket. Why did he have so many pockets? A gloved hand caressed his neck. The fingers were warm under the gloves.
Something was being pushed into his bloodstream, and it burned. Jason realized what was happening and turned his head abruptly, snapping the needle.
"Jason," Bruce whispered, desperation in his voice, or maybe it was fear. Jason threw his head forward, listening to the crack of his father's nose.
"Get off me. I hate you." He seethed. The burning liquid was settling in his system, leaving him feeling a budding sense of exhaustion. His arms and legs grew heavy, his eyes becoming fuzzy. There was something removing his mask and hood, running a hand through his unruly hair. It was gentle, so unlike the pain Jason knew he had just served.
"There you go, Jaybird. Just hold still. Sleep. I'm going to help you." Something cracked and hissed on his head as though Bruce was pulling something off, pain flaring from his temples. It got worse as Bruce continued to prod at whatever device was attached to him, fear coming and assaulting him full force. He needed to protect Bruce; they wanted him to hurt the family and… he threw up as many mental shields as he possibly could, forcing the unwanted presence out of his mind. Bruce looked at hi, eyes alarmed under the cowl.
"Jason. I'm getting it off, don't fight back it's…" his voice was fading in and out. He tasted blood. He needed the presence out. With a horrible shove to get the mind control as far away from him as possible, Jason blanked to Bruce's concerned face.
OoOoOoOoOoO
Jason woke up with a sense of panic. He couldn't move his arms or legs, could feel them strapped to a table. Panic was eating away at him as he opened his eyes. His heart couldn't pick a steady rhythm and it was making breathing a real chore.
"Let me go" He rasped.
Two figures sat up in his peripheral probably startled by his frantic movements.
"Jason, stop."
That was Bruce. Why the h*ll was Bruce strapping him to a table in the cave. His panic increased tenfold. This wasn't, he hadn't killed someone in a long time, not since turning from his old ways. He couldn't breathe.
"Jace, you have to calm down, deep breaths. No one is going to hurt you." That was Dick. "I'm going to let you out alright."
"You can't-"
Dick shook his head. "He knows who we are and he obviously isn't angry right now. Look at him."
Bruce looked skeptical, his cowl furrowing. Dick sighed.
"Jason, who am I?"
"Dick." He gasped as he tried to force his breathing to steady.
Dick came over and put a hand on his shoulder. His other was wrapped in thick bandages. "Good, but who am I in relation to you?"
Jason gave Dick an exasperated and panicked look. "Are you the d*mn riddler? What do you want?!"
Dick smiled. "What do these three people have in common, me, Tim and Damien."
Jason hissed. "I don't fu-freaking know. They are all Robins? Their brothers? What are you going for here?"
Dick grinned. "See he passed."
Batman continued to glance at him wearily, but did not object as Dick started to undo his binds. The first few were slow, because dick was one handed. Why was there so many restraints? He had bounds around his wrists and biceps, ankles, thighs, waist, and chest.
After one of his arms was free, Dick moved to his feet and Jason took over undoing his chest and other arm.
He noticed, absently that his chest strap was very loose around him. Which suddenly made since when he turned wrong and pain flared through his ribs.
He ignored it.
Once he was free, he sat up, wrapping his arms around his middle to give his very fractured ribs some support.
"What happened? Why am I down here?"
Dick looked uncomfortable, eyes flicking to Bruce who had yet to remove his cowl. That was a really bad sign.
"You don't remember?" Dick asked.
"No?! If I remembered dammit I wouldn't be asking!" Panic was making his voice rasp as it fought to leave his hyperventalating form.
"You were attacked and grabbed during patrol. They had some mind control devices and techniques." Bruce said, voice monotone
Jason paled. Oh no. No, no, no.
"What did I do?"
"You refused to give them any information. We already checked our system and there are no breaches."
"What did I do?" He was suddenly feeling nauseous.
"They thought it could be intriguing and beneficial if you fought us."
"Are the others-? What happened? I didn't-" words were struggling to make there way out of his mouth.
Dick tried to take a step forward but Bruce held out a hand to stop him.
"Damien had a sprained wrist and is currently sleeping off the equivalent of a taser. Tim has a broken leg. Dick had a concussion and a stab wound to his arm. You broke my nose."
He gingerly peeled of his cowl to reveal a bruised face and what Jason could image had been a very malformed nose.
"We're all pretty bruised and cut up, but we're alright."
Jason stopped breathing for a moment, which seemed like both a blessing and a curse, letting Bruce's words root in his mind. He hurt them. He broke them. He turned to the side, ignoring all the aches and pains in his body and retched.
Bile bubbled up from his mouth, burning as it left. His ribs screamed at him, from the position and what he was doing. Jason didn't give a sh*t.
Dick was trying to say something, but he couldn't bring himself to listen, but he knew he probably owed it to him. Well d*mn that was just another failure on his part. There was a sudden hand in his neck, trying to be comforting and it was, it was much kinder than he deserved. He pulled away from it, intending to deprive himself of it. He hurt them, he didn't deserve their comfort. But the hand that was shaken off followed with him after a moment anyway. He didn't shake it off again. Bruce was stubborn, and he was tired.
After he finally decided his stomach was through revolting, Jason, pulled his knees up to his chest, which hurt like nothing else, but he'd had worse so he ignored it. Usually this display of weakness would leave him angry. But he just couldn't bring himself to be angry at anyone other than himself.
Bruce withdrew his hand and Dick's voice was still there, words becoming actual sentences.
"-Breath Jay, you listening?"
He nodded.
"Good." He shared a look at Bruce. "I know you're probably not hungry per se, but you are definitely tired and bruised. Why don't we head upstairs? Sound good, little wing?"
Jason took a shaky breath and nodded. "Just- just give me a minute."
Dick nodded, sparing Bruce a glance and then walking upstairs.
Bruce just waited for Jason to get his breathing under control.
"Jason, what happened is not your fault."
Jason nodded numbly, not really taking in or believing the words. Like sympathy at a funeral, I'm sorry for you loss, ringing over and over in his ears. This was just something that Bruce was expected to say.
"I'll be upstairs alright? Why don't you change out of your suit."
He nodded again, listening as Bruce traveled up to the manor.
Without any care to his very abused body, Jason pushed himself up onto two feet and grabbed a spare grappling hook off the wall. Then he just walked out. He couldn't stay. He was a danger. He hurt them. Besides, Jason had always known deep down that this was not his home. Not anymore. Not after who he became.
OoOoOoOoO
He hit his rooftop with a roll. It made ever bruised broken inch of him want to scream, but Jason ignored it. He was getting really good at that. Instead he pushed his way down to his raggedy, little room. It was freezing, just like the chill outside, but it's not like Jason spent much time here anyway. The streets were apart of him he couldn't ever shake. He had also thought that the manor had become a home to him again, but he ruined that. He always did.
Whatever, he was- he would be fine. He's faced death, waking up in his own coffin after being buried and the League of Assassins. Nothing could keep him down... right?
He collapsed on his bed, not bothering to change and really uncaring toward his injuries. He curled up, which aggravated his ribs and just let himself sleep like he so desperately wanted. He was grateful it was dreamless.
He woke when he felt someone touch his shoulder. Instinctually, he grabbed his spare gun, hidden under his pillow, and flipped it toward the intruder, ready to shoot, finger already poised on the trigger.
"Holy sh*t. Damien?" Jason hissed, dropping the gun as though it had burned him. "What the h*ll are you doing here?!"
Damien gave him his most deadpan, are-you-stupid signature look. "You left. Thus we're here."
"We're?"
"Father and I. Tim was unable to make the journey and Dick was left to console him. In addition, the concussion makes him sensitive to the sunlight and if you haven't noticed it's well into the morning."
Jason rubbed his temples, trying to get his brain to wake up and also afraid that if he did, the incessant pain he had been feeling would increase. Whatever. It was fine. He'd had worse than a headache… and broken ribs… and more bruises and scratches than he would care to count… and a throbbing pain in his neck that he wasn't sure where it had come from… and, you know what, it was fine, no need to keep a mental list.
"You're going to come back to the manor." Damien all but demanded. "Father still needs to treat your injuries and everyone was distraught over your disappearance last night. Tim must have call at least several dozen times before we realized you hadn't ever gotten your phone back."
"S-sorry." Jason stuttered, unused to being guilt tripped by a literal eleven year old.
Damien tsked, but his eyes betrayed a fear Jason couldn't bear to look at. He also could stand looking at the wrap around his arm. Really he just didn't want to look at him at all. He turned his eyes to the ceiling.
"Get changed. We'll be outside. And if you try to make a hasty escape again, you should know we're watching your windows and you only have a single door."
"Fantastic." Jason muttered.
Damien left the room with a cocky grin.
Jason, albeit reluctantly, did as he was told. If Batman wanted him, he had committed enough crimes that by all means he should just listen to anything he had to say.
He stuffed his uniform into a backpack and got dressed.
Bruce watched him as he exited the room, probably noting all the ways that he could exploit his injuries should he attack again. Not that it would be necessary. Jason had all but surrendered. He wilted under his gaze however.
Damien looked as though he wanted to say something, but held his tongue at the last minute. Bruce nodded to the stair well.
"Let's go."
As they walked downstairs and toward the car, Jason couldn't bring himself to look into any of their eyes. He strapped himself into the absurdly expensive car parked outside his dingy apartment and slouched into the stupidly comfortable leather seats, irritated that they were comfortable and enjoying the fact that at least his ribs could ache and remind him exactly what he deserved.
Bruce and Damien didn't speak the entire ride, though Damien looked as though he wanted too. Jason thought that they may have been worried about setting him off. Not that he would… he couldn't even look at them, let alone raise a hand against them.
Once they were parked, Bruce ushered him into the Cave with a hand on his shoulder. Jason might have shoved it off because it made him feel like a scolded child, but maybe he deserved that right now.
At some point Damien had dissappeared.
"Sit." Bruce motioned at the medical bed, and Jason complied without a word.
"I don't need- I'm fine." Jason stumbled, wincing at how unconvinced and raw his voice sounded.
Bruce just continued, not even bothering to look in his direction, searching for whatever medical supplies he was looking for. Jason couldn't believe that Bruce of all people trusted him with his exposed back. Maybe it was just because the Bat knew he could easily take Jason. A well placed elbow to the ribs and a little luck and Jason would be on the floor with a punctured lung. He knew from experience, those were not something you just get over and fight with, especially not the Batman.
"Perhaps, but it would certainly make me feel better to check."
Jason grunted.
Bruce stood up, arms full of various supplies, which he set on the other side of the bed. Eyeing the supplies, Jason wrapped his arms protectively around himself. "You can't do anything for my ribs, and everything else is minor."
"Where are you so intent on going?" Bruce asked. Their was something joking in his tone, the sort of almost there, dry humor that slipped out every once and a while.
Jason shrugged, but he paled at the thought of what he was going to have to do next. Did he know what his next step was? What was he going to do now?
He didn't know and he hated it. He always had a plan, despite what all his brothers and Bruce said. He always knew his next step, and if he didn't, then he wouldn't go forward. He wasn't Bruce by any means, that man was obsessive and had to know everything, but he did like to know what he was going to do. Now he just didn't have a clue. Maybe he'd disappear for a few months, go untraceable and hope this would eventually go away. The scared, selfish part of him thought that was a brilliant idea, because it put off everything he didn't want to do. The rational part of him said he ought to just accept whatever the family had in store, whatever punishments they proposed. He deserved them, he deserved worst honestly. He hoped they wouldn't reject him, or worse send him back to Arkham. D*mn he prayed they wouldn't do that. It would kill him. The child in him, the one that had always seemed like a weakness to him after his resurrection, the little voice in his head that screamed what was right and what was wrong, wanted to curl up in a little ball and beg for forgiveness. He couldn't do anything. Jason never thought the day would come, but he froze.
Bruce's hands were on him, gentle and warm as they maneuvered Jason's neck to get a better look at the bruised and tender skin from where Jason had snapped the needle of the sedative. Jason responded to the soft touched without any fight whatsoever, which frightened Bruce more than he cared to admit. He prodded the swollen skin searching for any metal fragments that might still be embedded underneath the skin placing a small bandage on his neck out of habit more than, perhaps, necessity. Jason's breathing quickened as Bruce moved to remove his hoodie, but he let him without uttering a word of complaint.
Bruce hissed as he saw the damage done. Scars littered Jason's skin, scars he knew that, for the most part, Jason was proud of. They meant he had survived, that he won, but it still hurt Bruce to see them, because they represented a permanent reminder that someone or something had hurt his son. There were cuts all over his torso, probably from landing on the concrete and fighting with all the other Robin's and himself. But the bruises, the bruising was certainly the worst right now. They were everywhere and they were ugly. Huge red and black and purple splotches decorated Jason's skin. His ribs had a horrible gathering of them, definitely broken, and his back, right in the arch of it held another several scarily in the shape of a boot heel. There were more of course, all over his arms and shoulders, on the soft flesh of his sides.
The worst part was there was very little to do about bruises. Some ice, some rest, and medical attention if the bruises turned out to be hiding internal bleeding, which had happened so it wasn't out of the question. Bruce bandaged what he could tracing a hand down Jason's spine to make sure everything was still in line and intact. He shivered under Bruce's fingertips.
"How's your shoulder?" Bruce's hands had moved back up to prod the no longer dislocated appendage.
"Fine." Jason whispered.
"It's healing remarkably quickly, your ribs too, though those will take longer to recover from." Bruce said, though he didn't need too. They both knew why Jason was healing more quickly, but neither wanted to acknowledge the lasting effects of the Lazarath pit. It was the same reason why Jason had a faster metabolism and why drugs were weaker on him.
He nodded, and Bruce continued his examination.
"Legs on the bed."
Jason didn't respond for a moment but he very carefully set both his legs on the medical table, rolling up is pants and taking off his shoes Bruce could see whatever he needed. The same process was repeated. Finally Bruce moved up to Jason's face, finger going to his temples and moving his head so he could check where the mind control devices had been attached. Jaon flinched when his fingers touched the delicate skin.
"Did that hurt?"
"Headache." Jason replied softly.
Bruce nodded. "You night have that for a couple hours or a few days."
Jason nodded and averted his eyes, staring blankly at the wall.
"Jason!" Dick called, coming to peer into the bat cave. "Damian finally decided to grace me with his presense and declare you were home."
Jason winced at the word.
"Little bat is now demanding your attention Bruce, so you best go make sure he doesn't go kill Tim while the poor guy is trapped." Dick grinned his famous sh*t-eating grin.
Bruce sighed, but in all honestly he was glad Dick and Jason were going to be spending a little while alone together. If anyone could get Jason out of his own head, it was Dick. "Thank you for informing me. I'll see to it that Tim makes it through this ordeal alive." He finished with a small smile, really just quirking of his lips, but it didn't matter. Dick had known him a long, long time. He understood all the mans subtle nuances. It was one of Dick's many strengths, he could read all his families confusing and often times inappropriate reactions for what they truly were.
Bruce left, his footsteps echoing in the silent cave.
"Hey little wing," Dick started, his voice soft and gentle. Jason hated that Dick called him that, hated that Dick was trying to be comforting to him. He stabbed the man after all. Law of the street demanded retribution, an eye for an eye. Jason couldn't help himself, he started to shake. "Oh Jaybird." Dick whispered, wrapping a gentle arm around his shoulders, careful of all his bruises.
The contact made Jason recoil. "Don't- Don't touch me."
But Dick being, well, Dick didn't listen to him. He tenderly moved closer to Jason as he gently squeezed Jason's non abused shoulder to let him know just how much he wasn't going to listen.
"It's alright Jace. Nobody is going to hurt you."
That did it.
"Hurt me?!" Jason stood up, much to his entire bodies very violent protest. He ignored it. "For the love - Dick, I'm more worried about hurting you! I stabbed you!"
"In the arm." Dick responded.
"I don't think that was what I was aiming for." Jason snapped bitterly.
"How do you know? Do you remember?" Dick asked, his mouth forming that stupid little half smile he did. Not even trudging through Hell could wipe all traces of a smile from his brothers face.
Jason swiped his hand down his face. "No, but I'm a killer. I wouldn't have aimed for your arm."
Dick paused, looking at him thoughtfully. "No, you wouldn't, but you weren't aiming at anything Jay. You just threw a couple of knives hoping to push us back. One ended up flying toward's Damien and I caught it."
"In your d*mn arm!"
Dick shrugged. "Happens."
"God you're so awful." Jason hissed. "Why can't you just be angry with me? Yell, scream, hit me, do something other than be so full of sh*t. You cannot be this perfect all the time dammit."
Dick just gave him a sad stare. "Come here little wing."
Jason managed to push himself to walk the few feet that separated them since his outburst. Once he was within arms distance, Dick grabbed his hands and pulled him into a tight embrace. It hurt in more ways than one.
"It wasn't your fault little bird." Jason gave a watery laugh.
"That's not my nickname Dickhead. That's for the replacement."
"No, Tim's is baby bird. Since you're little wing, your also a little bird."
"I hate you. You cannot call me that."
Dick laughed. "Whatever you say. What I told you is true though. No one blames you, and I know that you know that, so what's eating away at you?"
"You should blame me!' Jason snapped. "I hurt you, with or without mind control. I've done it all. I thought I was getting better. I've listened to Bruce's absolutely ridiculous no kill rule. I haven't being dealing in the criminal underworld nearly as much, which is progress, I have to keep in touch with a few contacts anyway but that's beside the point! I didn't- I just-." Jason knew he was floundering, but he couldn't seem to find the words that were swimming in his pounding head. "I'm obviously still the same d*mn monster that crawled out of that godforsaken pit."
"Jason." Dick clutched him even tighter if it were possible. "You aren't the same person you were when you first came home. You've gotten happier, calmer. We know you wouldn't hurt us, especially not now. Don't let this make you think anything different. You're my brother, Little Wing."
Jason forced himself to nod. "You're a sedimental fool, Dickiebird."
Dick just laughed. "You have got to be hungry by now. I know you haven't eaten since yesterday. Lets go, I think Alfred made your favorites for breakfast and Tim was very upset that he couldn't see you."
"You better not be lying about pancakes." Jason mumbled, gracelessly pulling on his hoodie.
"I'd never." Dick swore, hand going over his heart. "Now lets go." He started taking the stairs to the house two at a time. Jason was slower, but Dick was patient, he waited when Jason fell more that a couple steps behind. Once they reached the top, Dick waiting for Jason to catch up and open the door, Jason stopped him. He glanced at the thickly bandaged arm on his brother and swallowed his pride. He had been getting better at that, but it was still hard.
"I'm sorry Dick."
His brother froze, and Jason had a moment to worry that he had somehow offended his brother, before he was pulled into a tight hug.
"I forgive you Jaybird." Dick mumbled into his ear. "I never blamed you, but if you need me to forgive you to forgive yourself, then I will."
"Don't make this a d*mn chick-flick moment, Bluebird." Jason hissed, even while returning the hug. "Now I'm hungry, lets go get strawberry pancakes."
Dick grinned and opened the door, dragging his brother into the kitchen and feeling severely self satisfied as Jason devoured several pancakes. Even Alfred couldn't help but let a small smile crawl onto his face as he watched the young masters laugh and mock each other, like nothing had ever happened between the two. No trauma, no death, no lying, nothing but brotherhood.
Tim hobbled in after half an hour and so much food neither Dick nor Jason could stomach any more. He looked good, other than the cast going up to his knee. Jason paled at the thought that he had broken his brother, literally. Suddenly the food was sitting even more heavy in his stomach.
Tim gave Jason and Dick a weary glance then looked over his shoulder as though expecting someone to burst through the door.
"Listen, before I start lecturing you two, have either of you seen Damien? Because he has gotten it into his mind that it would be a good idea to launch several surprise attacks to 'check my reflexes'. I'm pretty sure he just wants an excuse to attack me though so…"
Dick laughed. "No need to fear anything in here. Damien hasn't come in since we've been here."
Tim sighed in relief. "Thank any god in Gotham. You better not be lying to me about this Dick." Tim turned to his brother a serious expression overtaking his normally gentle features. "I can make your life very, very miserable."
Dick ruffled his hair. "Don't I know it."
He cast a glance between his two younger brothers and excused himself with the wretched lie that he could hear Bruce, of all people, shouting at him from all the way across the house. Jason rolled his eyes. Unless Batman was in a particularly foul mood, silent judgement was more his type of reprimand, and often times that cut a lot deeper than yelling. Jason should know. He had had plenty of both direct at him.
"You really should drink more water Jason. With your metabolism being quicker, you depleted water at a higher rate than you are currently replenishing it. Especially because I know you didn't drink anything last night, even after you fumbled your way back to your old apartment/safehouse."
"Fumble is a strong word and - wait! How do you know I didn't," Jason paused, eyes narrowing in realization. "You bugged me."
Tim gave him a self conscious shrug. "I've bugged all your safe houses, Dicks apartment both here an in Bludhaven and every warehouse Bruce has around the city for emergency use. I also bugged your cell in Arkham, the bat cave, Wayne enterprises in various spots, the Justice League meeting room, and more. I like to keep tabs on everyone."
Jason started laughing. He couldn't help himself. This kid was still a teenager and he had bugged some of the most secure places in the world. "Well sh*t Tim! That is the best thing I've ever heard. Does B know? Scratch that, what did he do when he found out you had bugged him."
Tim gave him a seriously scary grin. It was like dirty secrets and a little too much know-how. "I don't think he ever really decided whether he was proud or upset. I basically got off with a get out of jail free card and the blackmail comes in pretty handy so he's never asked me to take anything down. I also think he likes to use it to keep track of us when we're not at the manor."
Jason nodded in agreement but then be went still. "How long have you had all my places bugged?"
Tim looked away. "It's been a while. Since before you came back home, honestly since right before you went into-" He cut himself off. They both had no desire to bring up past trauma, and Arkham had certainly left it's mark.
"Well, I'd tell you not to watch me while I sleep, but since I know you'd just do it anyway without telling me, I guess I'll just get in the habit of narrating everything I do so you know when to turn the other way" Jason snarked.
"I certainly wouldn't mind the help. Save me some time." Tim replied with an all too excite grin. He sobered.
"Jay."
D*mn that stupid younger sibling, I'm-worried-about-you-you're-setting-a-bad-example voice.
"Mmm?"
"Please don't leave."
Mother of all that's holy, if that didn't just crush his whole d*mn moth-eaten heart. Kid had guilt tripping down to a science. Jason wanted to simultaneously cry and scream. Tim, the kid who never asked for anything, who expected everyone to leave him, was reaching out worried that Jason would flee.
"Statistically speaking," Hell, now the kid was using his stupid logic as a coping mechanism. It was something Jason had learned was common when Tim was uncomfortable with the touchy-feely stuff. "moments like these tend to send you spiraling and you choose to spiral alone, but we can help." Tim's eyes went hard. "I know we can. Please just give us the chance."
Give me the chance was what his eyes were pleading.
"Tim, I-"
"If you leave again, we will find you. We've done it before. I don't care if you were trained to disappear by the League of Assassins themselves, we have one of them too and we've outsmarted them in the past." Tim interrupted, his voice confident and yet just purely factual, so unlike the wild emotions that were flying through his eyes. Jason reach out and grabbed him by the shoulder. He wasn't into physical affection the way Dick was. In Jason's past touch had been associated with either pain or the fear of it. Even when he had been taken in, it took a long time before he realized that even Bruce's minimal contact wasn't a show. It took hour and hours of building trust to realize that when sparring, when anywhere, Jason could tap out and Bruce would follow through without judgment or fear of retribution. Tim, however uncomfortable it was to him, craved the touch he had been deprived of as a young child.
"I won't Babybird. I promise. Besides, I'd hate to lose my parter to Dickhead. Everyone knows he's looking to get back a Robin, and he can't have mine!" Jason replied. Tim's breathing stopped, his overly analytical eyes watching him for any signs of deception. Then a wide grin overtook his face.
"I love you too Jay."
Jason smirked. "Don't get ahead of yourself replacement. All the means is I prefer you to the demon."
"I heard that and the feeling is reciprocated Todd."
Well sh*t. He was going to be paying for that later.
"Speak of the devil."
"Demon, actually." Damien replied with a raised eyebrow.
"Same difference." Jason eyed Tim who was making a hasty escape, or as hasty as he could on crutches. Damien was watching him flee with an almost predatory smile.
"You know, most people would take pity on the weak."
"Pain is inevitable. Only the strongest survive." Damien hissed automatically. Jason nodded for the same reason. The league was still apart of them, no matter how much they both wanted to deny it.
"Suffering is optional." Jason finished. Both him and Damien shared a knowing glance, mouths twisting in disgust at the ingrained response.
"You look back to you're normally unpleasant self, Todd."
Jason might have laughed, but his ribs were throbbing from all the hugging and other nonsense. Instead he just let himself lean against the island and pick at the long cold scraps of his 'breakfast'.
"And you look up to completing your mischief."
Damien scowled "I do no such thing."
"Sure, that's why you are attacking Tim anytime you see him yes?"
"That's purely business." Damien replied, face going to his normally indifferent, serious expression. "And it's none of yours. However..."
"Whoa kid. I think I just got frostbite from how cold the was."
It was worth the shot at his pride to see Damien smile at his admittedly lame and cheesy joke. Sure the smile was still a tad too sharp to be truly fitting on the face of an eleven year old, but Damien wasn't the average kid anyway.
"Quit your incessant yapping Todd. I'm only going say this once. Everyone is relieved you're home."
And by everyone, Jason knew, Damien really meant that he was glad.
"Todd, you..." He shuffled a little awkwardly, which was a bad sign that they were both about to go into uncomfortable territory. "shouldn't... withdraw from us, after this."
He huffed, obviously annoyed that he was stumbling over his words, unused to feeling uncomfortable. "What I mean is that you shouldn't seek out revenge for this."
Jason turned away face hardening. He was right. He was the same monster who crawled out of the Larzarth pit screaming and bloody. His youngest brother thought he was about to turn to murder without a second thought.
"I don't do that anymore. I follow Bruce's rules, no matter how absurd I think they are. Justice not Revenge." He manage to reply past the hollow pit in his stomach.
Damien nodded. "If you truly believe that you follow that then you are a liar, Todd."
Anger flared and just as promptly disappeared when he looked at the littlest Robin.
"I wouldn't put it past me."
Damien just shook his head as though disappointed that Jason had not yet caught onto something that was dangling overhead.
"You have many... undesirable qualities." Damien paused. "But being a liar does not seem to be apart of your general character. So I have to question why you are currently doing so, as it is out of the normal."
"I'm not-"
"Criminals aren't the only people you can hurt Todd." Damien interrupted. "You hurt yourself when you leave. Justice not Revenge is not just for the criminals we stop, but for ourselves as well."
"I am a criminal." Jason muttered unhelpfully.
Damien shrugged. "Everyone likes having you around on a more permanent basis. Don't sour it by taking revenge on yourself." He walked away, leaving a speechless Hood in his wake.
OoOoOoOoO
Eventually night came to the city of Gotham, and the Batfamily was taking a well earned and mandatory night off. Jason had been unable to leave the mansion, someone, read everyone, had set up precautions around every possible exit to alert if Jason decided to leave the premises. They really didn't have too, given Jason was still very injured and not particularly up to breaking all of Bruce's encryptions to steal a motorcycle and drive to his closest safe house a solid 30 minutes away in one of the roughest neighborhoods in Crime Alley at midnight. He couldn't help but feel conflicted as he sat on his bed, avoiding falling asleep. Quiet nights like these were when the worst monsters came to light.
Besides, all his talks with his brothers gave him plenty to chew on until morning anyway.
"You look tired."
"So do you old man." Jason whispered into the dark room, not bothering to look towards the figure standing in his doorway. "Tired and bruised." He finished bitterly. He let his head rest on his knees. He didn't care that he knew it looked childish.
"Jay, I talked to your brothers."
"Oh? Which tattle tale do I need to thank for this?"
Bruce took a couple steps forward until he was standing at the edge of the bed. "All of them. They each seemed pretty concerned for your well being."
"It's nothing I can't handle. I deserved whatever punches you guys threw at me to make me stop."
"Not just that kind, Jaybird." Bruce sighed as he sat down.
"That's- that's the only kind I'm interested in discussing." Jason stumbled. From this angle, it was hard to avoid the tell tale bruising across Bruce's nose and face. He turned away again only to feel a warm hand catching his cheek.
"Jaylad." Bruce whispered and dammit if that wasn't all it took for Jason to just break.
"I'm sorry, Bruce. I know I couldn't control it, but I hurt you and I'm sorry because I hurt you in the past and I'm still a pain in the a* even now but I'm trying and I just can't-"
Bruce put a gentle hand on his shoulder and the other grabbed his erratically waving hand, clutching it in his own.
"Shh, Jay. Listen to me." Jason forced himself to stop his ridiculous breakdown. "I don't blame you for hurting me last night."
"I've done so much worse than that." Jason hissed. "I always hurt you. That's all I do, past, present, and future."
"No." Bruce corrected. He grabbed Jason's other hand and began to rub circles on his palms. It was soothing and grounding. "Jay, I will never not forgive you for hurting me. Pain means you mean something to me. I want it to hurt, because it's proof that I love you."
D*mn you Bruce. Tears were definitely falling again.
"Your brothers are right Jason. We're here for you. We want you to stay with us, heal with us."
Jason leaned into Bruce's chest, body suddenly overcome with exhaustion and relief. Bruce immediately wrapped his arms around him, pulling him closer to the older man, nearly on his lap.
"Jason, your family is worried about you. Tell me you'll stay." The last part was a command, a mixture of Bruce's parental concern and Batman's authority.
Jason remained silent.
"Say it to me, Jace."
He took a shuddering breath, already half asleep in Bruce's arms. "I'll stay."
Everything in Bruce seemed to lighten and he ruffled Jason's hair. "Good. I love you Jason."
He suspected that Jason had finally fallen asleep before a quiet voice whispered.
"I love you too, dad."
Bruce couldn't stop a smile from gracing his features as a he laid his sleeping son onto his bed.