Silence reigned like a tyrant forbidding all sound upon their return. No one could bring themselves to utter even a single word as they crossed the sea as if this simple act was a heinous crime. Not even a sigh of relief was heard when they finally spotted the reef despite how tired they all felt, after all there was no cause for celebration. The rescue mission had been a failure and only a failure. They had nothing to be proud of as they returned with nothing but a dull look and a broken crossbow.

What could they even say to each other anyway ? That they had failed ? That all of this was for nothing ? How ashamed they were that they couldn't save a child in need ? No… Their silence already said everything. The despondency that filled them kept them mute and it was better that way, or so he thought. Jake didn't want to know anything. It hurt too much and he didn't need to hear what everyone was quietly thinking.

There was no need to twist the knife any further in an already bleeding wound.

The village became increasingly clear as the search party drew closer, and the remaining metkayinas were already gathering near the dock to eagerly welcome them. The excitement of the crowd could be felt from here, their enthusiastic voices ringing out to them, happy to finally see them again. But the closer they got, the more the smiles and bright looks of the na'vi made him feel sick. Nausea was starting to seep into his stomach as acid was rising in his throat and his eyes automatically lowered in shame and grief to avoid meeting anyone's gaze.

He couldn't even blame them for that reaction, he remembered. After all, they still had no idea what had happened...

Jake gritted his teeth and tightened his grip on the piece of crossbow he had kept with him as if he couldn't bring himself to let go of the one thing Lo'ak had left behind. As crazy as it sounds, this object was endowed with an indescribable value for him as if somehow it contained a fragment of Lo'ak and if he held it close enough to his heart he would could get closer to his son. It was stupid, he knew that, but it was the only thing they had found despite their best efforts and giving it up was unbearable for him.

He had already given up too much tonight. He had already abandoned the search for Lo'ak despite his soul screaming at him not to and...God...he had abandoned his own son to return, he thought as his heart seemed to be scratched alive as the guilt clutched around his neck.

How could he even face his own reflection after that ?

The search party volunteers finally arrived at the dock to rejoin their families and in turn Jake descended slowly from his tsurak despite his persistent numbness. Every move he made was slow and awkward and for some reason his body ached as if he had suddenly aged thirty years in just a few hours. He was exhausted, completely drained from this horrible night and yet he knew very well that he would never find sleep until dawn finally came.

This seemed to be the worst night he had ever lived since the Sky People returned, he thought as he massaged the creases in his forehead before going to tend to his tsurak.

As Jake gently put down the piece of crossbow in resignation so he could undo the saddle of the tsurak, his ears turned in spite of himself to the curious voices of the metkayinas approaching them. Without even trying to understand what they were saying, their tone filled with hope and obliviousness was enough to make him feel uneasy and Jake took a deep inspiration like a last breath before having to face a particularly difficult situation.

Give him strength.

After finishing with the straps, Jake's gaze unconsciously fell on Neteyam who was only a few feet away from him. The boy looked completely lost while his eyes drifted past him without seeming to see anything as if his mind was miles away. His cheeks were still clouded with tear trails that had like nicked his skin and Jake's heart clenched painfully at the sight.

Neteyam had pleaded with him earlier, his mind remembered. He had begged not to leave while Lo'ak was still lost at sea. He had wept for his brother. Cry like he had never seen him do before. Jake felt absolutely awful for not giving in to his pleas when his only wish was to listen to him and go after his youngest son no matter how dangerous it might be. He had wanted so badly to find another option, no matter how small a solution. He had wanted it so much. But nothing had happened as he had hoped and now it was too late.

Jake wanted to go comfort his son. He wanted to erase that expression from his face and tell him that they were going to succeed tomorrow morning but he didn't know how and more than anything, he didn't know if it was actually true. Moreover, he had been the one who had agreed to end the search unlike him and Neytiri. Did he even have the right to say anything after what he had done ?

The thought that Neytiri and Neteyam could blame him for this suddenly felt like a punch in his abdomen and the guilt only felt even bigger in his chest as if it was ready to implode. Worst of all was that he completely understood their potential grudge and if he had been at their place, he probably would have done the same.

God, what had he done ?

A hand unexpectedly clung firmly to his left arm and Jake suddenly turned his head to the side in surprise before seeing Neytiri.

Her grip was strong in his flesh almost as if clinging like an anchor to a rock for fear of being swept away by the current when her legs were too weak to support her. She was breathing in a controlled way and she seemed to be holding back her tears so hard that Jake could have cried on the spot seeing her trying. Neytiri didn't even seem able to take her eyes off the ground without collapsing and the fact that she trusted him enough to guide her despite what he had done could almost have him begging on his knees for forgiveness.

However, instead of all that, he simply placed his right hand over hers tenderly before slowly walking towards the crowd.

The metkayinas were standing some distance from them and the excitement from earlier seemed to have quickly died down to be replaced by confusion combined with worry. They had probably realized that something was wrong, probably because of their gloomy and joyless expressions. He couldn't even imagine what they must have looked like at the moment, surely as awful as they felt, not that that was a surprise.

After all, the past few hours had been so horrible…

Will it be the same tomorrow ? He wondered in spite of himself as he felt his wife's fingernails dig into his skin as they advanced. It couldn't be, his mind responding like it was on autopilot. Even if the chances were already low, it was still possible. He just had to keep hoping, he desperately tried to convince himself.

They were going to find Lo'ak. They had to. Tomorrow. It was their last chance.

Otherwise, what were they going to do ?

" Mom ! Dad !", a high-pitched voice suddenly echoed through the crowd as a small silhouette rushed towards them and Neytiri didn't think twice before letting him go to get on her knees before Tuk immediately jumped into her arms.

Their youngest daughter always gave them a hug whenever she didn't see them for a while and as parents they loved it, but this time it seemed to push Neytiri over the edge. She hugged Tuk even tighter before burying her face in her shoulder to hide her tears and as she started shaking heavily, Tuk quickly looked up in confusion at him not understanding what was going on.

What could he even say to those eyes ? He wondered as he silently watched the little girl curl up in her mother's embrace. She was going to be so devastated when she finds out what happened to her brother…

They all were...

Brushing his shoulder, Neteyam moved as well to his mother's side to try to support her as best he could and as Jake stared at the painting in front of him, he could do nothing but blame himself again and again to have caused this. He hated so much to see his family so devastated and he couldn't help but think that it was all his fault. He had pushed Lo'ak towards this tragedy, he had been too hard on him for too long and now he had abandoned him.

Jake closed his eyes tightly as his knuckles became lighter in his palms. A father was supposed to protect his family, to support them no matter what, but what kind of father did that ? He wondered with a self-hatred he thought have long since forgotten.

What kind of father was he ?

When his eyelids opened after a moment, Jake would rather look away than see the misery he had created, but as he looked away he saw another pair of confused and yellow eyes.

"Kiri…", he whispered after slowly moving towards his daughter before reaching out to brush her hair out of her face but before he could even try, Kiri pulled away abruptly.

"Where's Lo'ak?", she asked sharply as her pupils passed over each of his eyes insistently. Her tail was swinging fervently behind her in obvious concern and her eyebrows were furrowed in such alarm that Jake swallowed hard knowing what he had to say.

"We didn't find him...", he said after a moment in a hoarse voice and Kiri's face seemed to freeze in place. "But-" he took her by the shoulders before quickly adding, "We're going back at dawn. We just have to be patient and wait and then we'll search all day if we have to, until we find him. I promise "

Kiri shook her head slowly, not seeming to have heard the rest of what he said. "You didn't find him…", she repeated again with difficulty, slowly placing a hand on her skull as if a migraine had just appeared. "He- he-" she tried to speak before Jake realized her breathing was starting to quicken erratically.

"Hey, Kiri", Jake immediately cupped his face taking as soft a voice as he could, "Babygirl, stay with me. Breathe. Breathe slowly", he whispered as Kiri tried her best to control herself.

"He- He just wanted to defend me", she said as her cheeks moistened as Jake did his best to wipe away the tears, "It was stupid I know but- but he hadn't done anything wrong… I don't understand "

His chest ached. "I know Kiri. I know "

" So why ? Why did this have to happen to him ? ", she asked with watery eyes and Jake felt his throat constrict as if a rope had been tied around his neck.

Why ?

He had asked himself that same question so many times before. Why had he lost his parents ? Why had he lost the use of his legs ? Why had his brother been killed for only a few dollars ? Why was humanity so cruel ? Or yet, why didn't they deserve peace after all they had been through ?

There were so many whys and yet so few answers.

Jake didn't think they deserved everything that was happening to them. He never did. Maybe he thought that about himself but… Pandora was such a beautiful place that he knew deep down that this world didn't deserve any of this. This planet should never have ended up in the hands of mankind, he sometimes thought as if he had never been one of them. But no matter who Jake had been or what he had done in the past, one thing was certain, his children should never have had to pay for his sins.

He should have been the only one to suffer from his past.

Jake passed his thumb on his daughter's cheek trying to find a way to answer her but when he realized he couldn't, he took her in his arms just as he had done with Neteyam and Neytiri. "I-I don't know why..." he admitted resignedly as the helplessness of the last few hours came back with full force while he felt Kiri sobbing softly against him.

"I prayed to Eywa for him. To protect him", she whispered breathlessly. "II thought she might hear me like I do. I really thought it could work."

Jake stroked her hair sympathetically for this desperate act he had also done sixteen years earlier. "You did your best. We all did ", he says before looking up at the starry sky.

Neytiri, Neteyam and him had given everything they had during the search and even if Kiri had not been with them physically, she had certainly been mentally. He could even hear Tuk crying in high-pitched gasps behind him, probably for the same reason as them. They were all so affected by this gash that had hurt their family. As if the loss of their home wasn't enough, Lo'ak's loss was certainly the last straw.

Lo'ak, please be safe, Jake begged his son. Your family is so worried about you.

Suddenly, silence settled as the crowd parted to make way for a wide path to the dock. As someone slowly walked towards them, the Na'vi's heads bowed one by one in respect and reverence before the Tsahik abruptly stopped, followed shortly by her eldest son. Ronal was now in the center as her gaze swept over them all before settling on her mate awaiting an explanation.

"Where is the boy ?", she asked in a loud and strict voice.

Tonowari took several steps towards her before slamming his spear into the ground with a loud impact. "The boy remains lost. For now", he told his wife and the rest of his people. "As soon as the light returns, we will continue the search. But until then make sure you rest. Tomorrow will be another day, so we have to be ready"

Ronal closed her eyes with a straight face before to open them again, shaking her head. "After so long...", she said. "Even you know it's probably too late to do anything"

The Oloektan grimaced at his wife's harsh remark but even though she was probably right, his gaze remained determined. "If there is a chance to save this child we will. It's the right thing to do especially when trying has become our duty as parents of our son", he reminded before looking at the teenager he was talking about. " Come with me ". Tonowari grabbed the boy's arm to pull him towards them then forced him to his knees in front of Jake and his family.

"Tonowari…" Jake whispered as he sat up next to Kiri at the sudden attention they were being given.

"The blame is his," the Oloektan said firmly, still holding his son's shoulder forcefully to keep his position. "He knew better than to take your son off the reef and leave him alone. I have no excuses for him and his actions other than his immaturity and misplaced pride. I promise you that he will be punished accordingly and that I will personally keep him away from your family." Tonowari then lowered in a pronounced arc. "We owe you for this"

Jake remained silent as he watched the two metkayina. He really didn't know what to feel in front of this boy he had almost forgotten in all his dark and anguished thoughts. He had spent so much time blaming himself for his own mistakes that blaming the boy who had insulted his daughter and put his son in this situation hadn't clearly crossed his mind. He had been so focused on finding Lo'ak all this time that it only had been an abstract idea lost somewhere in his brain. But now…

Jake wanted to be mad at the boy. He so wanted to let his rage out like fire, even though he was just a kid. But despite all the negative emotions that had lodged within him, the sadness and fatigue were too strong for the embers to ignite. He didn't have the strength.

He just wanted his son back...

That was all...

"Thank you, we appreciate your help," Jake said politely without looking up. Blaming the boy even more than he already was was pointless. It was best to save his strength for tonight, he thought. He will need it.

As Jake finally resigned himself to the grief that had washed over him, a loud thud suddenly sounded behind him and Jake immediately turned back to its source.

Kiri, who had been by his side all this time, now had one knee on the ground as she held her head in her hands as if she was in pain. Her breathing was short for some reason Jake didn't know and her face was creased in a painful grimace that only worried him even more.

Jake rushed to his knees in front of his daughter. "Kiri! What happened ?", he asked as the rest of their family approached her in concern.

"Kiri, are you hurt ? Is this your head ?", Neytiri inquired, examining the teenager's skull after crouching down beside them, worry having taken over from sadness. Tuk was also leaning behind her shoulder trying to reach to her sister but Neteyam was gently restraining her to let their parents do the right thing.

"No I-", Kiri said as she finally opened her eyes with more ease as she tried to escape her mother's hands. "I thought I saw something", she whispered more quietly as she sat up, staring out to sea.

Jake watched his daughter with a frown. He could feel Neytiri throwing him a quick glance with the same concern as him at Kiri's strange behavior but he couldn't take his eyes off their daughter as she stared into the distance as if seeing more than anyone else. She appeared to be aware of something that nobody else did and no matter how hard Jake tried to figure it out, he found himself completely lost in front of Kiri's golden irises.

What could she possibly see ?

Jake stood up with a hand on Neytiri's shoulder. "Kiri-"

"There's something out there," the girl said with a frown, pointing out to sea.

Jake looked towards the shore and believed for a moment that Kiri had been subjected to a mirage but as his pupils searched in the darkness beyond the rocks, all his theories of possible visions vanished. There was light. The characteristic light of Pandora's bioluminescence.

What the hell-

Jake squinted as he observed what it could be just like the metkayinas that had gone completely silent after Kiri's intervention. Probably no one had expected this turn of events but it didn't take long for the crowd to approach the dock to get a better view of what had entered the reef.

"A tulkun !", a woman exclaimed in surprise as confused whispers began to fill the air.

"What is he doing alone ? The tulkun are never alone", another said worriedly.

"There is someone with the tulkun ! »

At this last remark, Jake felt a shiver go through his spine as Neytiri abruptly turned towards him with a hand covering her mouth and just by meeting her gaze, Jake knew that she had thought of exactly the same thing as him.

Could it be-

"Calm down my people ! Calm down !", the Oloektan ordered before adding more softly. "This tulkun must need help if he left his group to come our way. We have to go see what it's all about", he said, giving him a knowing look.

Without wasting a moment, Jake put the saddle back on his tsurak and dove into the water with Neytiri right behind him. His heart raced as he narrowed his eyes to see in the darkness of the sea and the tsurak swam so fast that the pressure of the water against his ears could almost pierce his eardrums. Neytiri had her arms wrapped around his belly with force not to fall and even if he knew that she was not used to the speed of this animal, he also knew that she was as impatient as him to even think to slow down.

It could be him, a voice was screaming in the back of his mind.

It could be Lo'ak.

The tsurak violently pierced the water to reach the surface once they were close enough and several metkayinas were already there to inspect the situation in search of the slightest anomaly. Tonowari and Ronal were also nearby but Jake didn't even notice them as he rushed towards the animal without wasting even a second. He couldn't waste any more time, certainly not when his hopes might turn out to be true and absolutely nothing could stand in his way.

He had to go see for himself if his heart would finally be freed from this endless torment or if it would just sink deeper into it.

He had to know.

For Lo'ak...

The tulkun was oodly calm as he growled softly towards them as if trying to communicate with them. Jake wasn't quite sure if it was possible to understand what he was trying to say or even if he was really speaking to them but, when his eyes met his huge pupils, Jake was startled by the look of recognition that crossed them as if somehow the tulkun knew who he had to be.

Jake eagerly removed his braid from the bond of the tsurak before immediately diving into the water to join the animal who was still motionless as its gigantic eyes still remained riveted on him. It only took a few seconds to reach his mutilated fin and while Jake hesitated whether he could climb on his back, the understanding and encouraging gaze of the tulkun took away all of his doubts about what he should do.

"MaJake !", Neytiri called out from behind him as she closely followed him but Jake didn't even turn to look at her as he finally climbed onto the animal before his heart suddenly stopped as his eyes drifted to a motionless shape.

There was a body.

That of a boy.

And his skin was the same color as his.

"LO'AK !", he called out in pure panic as he ran towards the thin and inert figure before throwing himself to his side.

His hands were shaking as Jake tried to gently flip the boy onto his side as if he were holding glass in his hands that could shatter at any moment if he was too rough. There was blood. His arms were covered with cuts as well as his back and even his face had been damaged. Lo'ak was completely unconscious, his eyes closed and his face relaxed as if he were just sleeping, and Jake was suddenly terrified as he imagined the worst.

It couldn't happen.

Neytiri ran towards them only seconds after getting on the tulkun and almost froze upon seeing them as she let out an anguished gasp. She shook her head with a terrified expression before dropping to her knees urgently as her hands rushed to the face of their child still nestled in his arms. " No no no. Please no !", she cried as her irises traced each wound running through Lo'ak's skin in horror.

Seeing Neytiri's breathing quicken, Jake lifted Lo'ak's body in his arms before pressing his ear against his chest in search of the slightest noise. For a sweltering moment, he thought he heard nothing but the waves and his own heart bouncing furiously against his ribcage, but as the seconds stretched agonizingly, Jake could finally make out heartbeats he knew be those of his son.

He's alive, he almost wept with relief.

His son is alive.

Jake manages to free one of his hands to place it on Neytiri's cheek. "He's alive", he whispered softly with emotion as if saying it out loud after all this time was a miracle. "He's still with us", he said with a tremor in his voice as he held back a threatening sob from escaping.

All this time, they had both suppressed that thought yet plausible, as if the death of one of their children was unimaginable. They had fled this possibility like the devil even if it hovered above them at all times. It had haunted them like it was impossible to get rid of, but now they had proof that they had finally escaped it.

Their child's heart was still beating and it was as if they could breathe again.

"Oh, Great Mother, thank you", Neytiri sighed heavily as she gently stroked Lo'ak's forehead. " Thank you "

After the pure joy that had passed through him, Jake's attention then shifted to their son's battered body and the worry that seemed to have been relieved suddenly returned with full force. There were mostly superficial wounds such as simple and shallow cuts, but their sheer number was what worried Jake. It was everywhere. Not a single part of his flesh had been spared. His arms and back were the most affected areas and during his inspection, Jake's eyes even noticed the boy's blood-covered fingers which seemed to be in more than pitiful condition.

What had happened to him to end up in this state ? He wondered with a dry throat.

An unsteady breath suddenly sounded next to him. "MaJake…", Neytiri said softly, tapping his arm to get his attention.

Jake didn't want to take his eyes off his son's face, but the insistence in his wife's voice didn't give him that choice. He looked up to meet Neytiri's yellow pupils but contrary to what he had expected, she was not looking at him. Instead, she was looking down with a horrified expression and Jake frowned before turning his head to Lo'ak's legs.

In just an instant, Jake's face fell.

Lo'ak's leg was simply ravaged. From the knee to the ankle, the flesh was swollen in a disturbing way and the skin had taken on a purple hue or even almost entirely red as the blood flowed slowly without seeming to stop. Just by noticing the slight deviation of his tibia was taking, it was not difficult to guess that the bone was definitely broken and, unfortunately, it was impossible to know in how many pieces. This injury was serious, very serious, and how painful it must be.

Jake felt sick and his heart was beating faster when he felt how scared this injury made him. He had seen this type of injury before and it never ended well. Never. Back on Earth, how many soldiers he saw come out of the infirmary with one limb missing ? He could't even count. Like him, these people unfortunately did not have the means to afford expensive operations to treat themselves. He had been in first class to find this out when his spine had been hit by that fucking bullet.

That wasn't going to happen to his son, was it ?

Suddenly, his ears pricked up when he heard a cough and Jake immediately faced Lo'ak who, for some reason, seemed to be choking.

"Lo'ak ?!", Neytiri panicked. "Lo'ak ? Can you hear me ?"

The coughing wouldn't stop, but thanks to his army first aid training, Jake was able to react immediately by laying Lo'ak on his side so that he could evacuate what was clogging his airways. In just a few seconds the cough seemed to subside but it slowly stirred up new concern in his stomach. Jake quickly tilted Lo'ak's head back before bringing his ear to the boy's mouth and as he feared he could hear a steady hiss coming from his lungs.

"Shit !", he swore sharply. "He's not breathing properly !", he exclaimed as he settled Lo'ak back into his arms while being careful with his leg to carry him as fast as he could towards the tsurak. "We have to bring him back ! NOW ! »

Neytiri followed him without hesitation and without even discussing his sudden panic as she helped him place their boy on the tsurak before holding him tightly against her chest so Jake could take the reins. There was no time to waste even though their pace had been slowed with Lo'ak squeezed between them. This had to be dealt with as soon as possible and Eywa knew how much time they had already lost.

Jake rushed straight ahead without even stopping near the metkayinas that surrounded them. He knew that Ronal had fortunately followed them since they had reached the tulkun and although he was deeply grateful for that, he could not express it directly. The only thing he could more or less focus on was Neytiri's soft whispers as she tried to reassure their child even though he couldn't hear her, and yet, he couldn't take his eyes off of the destination he was aiming for.

They were almost there before they could finally heal him. Just a little more and his son will be saved.

Hold on Lo'ak, he thought through gritted teeth.

We got you.