In A Band: Part 2
No matter how many times she woke up in the morning, she knew what she'd experienced for the past week was no dream, no illusion. How could it, when almost every morning, she looked at her phone, she saw a "good morning, Ackerman" and a time and place for their band practice after school from Reiner.
She wasn't sure what or how it happened, but she seemed to be…adopted into this group of boys. She didn't see them much during classes, only at lunch when they practiced in the band room but saw plenty of them after school.
There are some days where Mikasa can't make it, courtesy of her mountain pile of homework, but majority she will. She had yet to tell her brother about her newfound extra-curriculars, but part of her wanted to keep it that way; if she spoke it into existence, maybe it will disappear…
She hopped out of the shower, wrapping a white towel around herself and one up in her long cascades of hair to dry, before dodging Rogue's resting body on the bath matt and heading into her bedroom. Her clothes for the day lay neatly on her bed, which she bypassed to get her undergarments from her dresser. Choosing a grey set, she undid her towel and proceeded to dress herself.
She double-checked her contents of her school bag, before clicking to Rogue.
"Come on, boy, breakfast time!" He trotted in front of her, and she followed him downstairs into the kitchen.
As usual, Levi was cooking- flipping pancakes and turning bacon- and Petra sipped tea at the kitchen table, invested in another novel. She had finished ACOTAR and moved onto "Fourth Wing" and seemed just as invested.
"Pick your poison," Levi said over the crackle of bacon.
"Tea, please," Mikasa replied, sitting down at the table, Rogue walking over to his food dish.
All was peaceful as Levi placed a cup in front of her with sugar and milk, Petra read on with eyes practically glued to the pages, and Mikasa poured herself some steaming caffeine.
Sighing after a minute, Petra marked her page and placed the book down, Levi placed a plate in front of her.
"Thank you, love…can I call you-,"
"Absolutely not." Mikasa couldn't stop the giggle as another one of Petra's lofty ideals from her novel was attempted on Levi and denied.
"Damn, but this guy is…"
"Should I be worried?"
Scowling, similar to the face he just made, Petra grumbled, "Absolutely not."
Grunting, Levi took his own seat. "Mik, Friday I'll be gone for the night, so don't wait up for dinner. I can leave some money for take out, if you want."
Swallowing her food, wisely, she smiled. "That would be great! Is it because of the festival?"
Levi grunted. "Brats will be out until after midnight, so I volunteered my services. Do you want some cash for that as well? Figured maybe you'd go this year, as it's your final one."
Shrugging, Mikasa poured more Blueberry syrup onto her stack. "I didn't really plan on it. I don't have a yukata that fits anymore."
"If you did, would you go?" Petra wondered. She shrugged again.
"Not my scene…"
Petra seemed like she wanted to push further, but a look from Levi had her stopping herself.
"At least make sure you walk the dog before dark that night, doors locked by sunset…"
Nodding, they continued their breakfast in silence.
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A half hour later, the three were piling into the garage and climbing into their respective vehicles, Petra getting in her own today, as Levi had a meeting at headquarters.
Starting the ignition, Mikasa decided to stop for an extra tea on the way and maybe she'd grab something quick for the band as well.
More or less they were usually in the band room before classes start to store their instruments and discuss their gameplan. She had knocked, out of curiosity, once, and was greeted by them brightly. During the 10-minute interaction, Mikasa had noticed, not one, not two, but three of them had toast in their mouths and a Coke in their hand. Stunned, she asked if that was their breakfast and she blanched when they answered yes. Since then, she had been wanting to start getting them into better morning habits, breakfast was step one.
She pulled into the parking lot of the "Garrison" café and checked the time.
"8:15." She had half an hour to get to school and in class.
Keeping her head down, she waited in line for her turn, which came easily.
"Good morning, Mikasa!"
Snapping her head up at the familiar, raspy voice, Mikasa smiled small for the middle-aged blonde beaming at her from behind the till.
"Good morning, Mr. Hannes," she greeted.
"Usual today?"
"Yes, but can you add 6 blueberry cinnamon bagels to that, please?"
Hannes looked up from the till, eyebrow raised. "You taking them home to your brother or something?" Mikasa shook her head.
"They are for my…um, my…guys?" she answered, frustratingly flustered. "They are for these guys I know…"
Hannes, ever the paternal spirit, leaned forward on the counter. "'These guys you know'. How many guys there?"
Eyes narrowing, defiantly, Mikasa crossed her arms. "Five." Hannes blinked at her for a second, before giving a sideways smile.
"You're going to want a bit more than that if your feeding 17-year-old guys. I'll add on a few ham and Swiss croissants, and I'll make your tea an extra-large, on me," he said, typing into the screen.
"Hannes, you don't have to do that! It's, really, fine. I can pay for them, I've just never…" Sighing in defeat, Mikasa faced the ground.
"You've never done this before. Which is why it's. On. Me." He handed her the receipt for the order and closed her fist around it. Blinking rapidly, Mikasa smiled.
"Thank you."
He grunted in response. "Now, ma'am, please make your way down the counter where your order will be waiting."
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.
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Locking her car door, Mikasa tried not to fumble with the two bags and hot-ass tea she was carrying, and made her way toward the school.
As she did so, naturally, the whispers started; with her armload, this caused very questioning stares. She sped up her walking, screeching around corners on her heels.
"What the hell is she carrying?"
"Is her hair…down?"
"Look at how fast she's walking!"
"I hope the tea spills on the white shirt, ya know?"
"Are those all for her?"
Keeping her eyes level, hair curtained, she gritted her teeth. You're almost there…
Without even thinking, she turned into the hallway where the band room was and swung the door open with her foot, causing all five of them to jump, three of them to yelp in surprise, and two to curse. Breathing heavily, she closed it behind her.
"I'm sorry for barging in…" she said, walking further into the room. They watched as she handed Marcel the food (he seemed the most trustworthy with it) and gesture to it. "There are some bagels with butter, cream cheese on the side, as well as ham and Swiss croissants. I hope you all like blueberry cinnamon, it seemed delicious to me, I can get a different kind next time. There should be enough there for all of you, but I didn't know how many of you ate this morning…you're all staring at me, why?"
Indeed, the men just stood around as Marcel peeked into the bags, the steam and aroma wafting out of the paper bags. They all wore utter shock on their faces. Mikasa felt sick.
"I'm sorry, I should have asked- you don't like blueberry cinnamon-."
Mikasa was silent when Porco walked up to her and poked her in the forehead. "Quiet, Ackerman. You bought us breakfast."
She shrugged. "Well, not technically…"
"You brought us breakfast, and that is probably the damnest, sweetest thing you could've done for us." Porco reached for her tea, popped the lid, had a sip. "Yum, English Breakfast." He handed it back to her. "I'm digging into this right now." Turning he yanked the bag out of Marcel's hands, the latter sputtering with shock, before they all started to grab at Porco to get their share.
"Not all for you, you selfish prick!"
"How dare you betray her trust in me!" Marcel was probably the most upset about it; Eren was the least as he walked up to Mikasa, looking bored as ever, but his eyes sparkled. Without a second thought, she instinctively held her tea out to him.
"I think I know why Hannes upgraded me to an extra large…"
He took it, didn't bother with the lid, and sipped. "I know him."
Mikasa's eyes widened. "You know Hannes?"
Eren nodded. "He is friends with my dad. I've worked at the Garrison for a couple summers, involuntarily, might I add…"
The image of Eren behind a till serving tea and baked goods made her bit her lip to keep from laughing. She turned away quickly when she couldn't suppress the smile, but Eren took her chin, turned her to him.
"Never turn away from me if you're about to laugh or smile or show any emotion. I want to see it, even at my expense…"
He dropped his hand from her face, but Mikasa stayed right where she was, utter bewilderment shining. She felt her whole world halt.
"Thank you for breakfast," he said before turning away and grabbing his share of goods.
The world faded out again, giving her tunnel vision as she watched him walk away. Her heart rapidly pounding in her chest, her breaths coming short. It's that feeling again… It wasn't anxiety, she knew what those felt like, and it wasn't this. This one felt…good. Like the storm calmed, like everything inside her, of her, was at ease, peaceful. There weren't words she knew that could explain it.
But there is one…
Shaking her head, Mikasa straightened and joined in on the baked goods, her tea being passed around as well.
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In first period, Mikasa had both Hitch and Mina, and surprisingly she found out, Porco and Marcel.
When Mikasa had first realized this, she, shamefully, ignored them. They didn't seem to mind as Mina and Hitch made quite the racket and seeing her with them probably caused them to stay away. She may or may not have gestured to them behind the girls back to not come over, they simply smirked, shaking their heads. Now she was seeing a resemblance.
Either way, she still didn't talk to them much simply because Mina and Hitch were too busy chattering loudly and whispering how hot the "Jawline Brothers" were. She spent half the class with her head buried in her hands. She was pretty sure they both could hear them, as she's caught them laughing silently at one point last week.
Today's class started off no different. She walked in to find the two girls already seated at the two desks on the far left two rows back. Mikasa would sit on the one behind them, the seat next to her vacant, always.
She did so and was greeted with bright smiles, and "hello's".
"Hey, girls," she replied, taking her seat. "How did the homework go?" They both shrugged.
"I didn't end up finishing a couple questions, but it doesn't count too much on our final grade," Mina said.
"And besides, I can hardly focus on that when the fall festival is in 2 days! My order of Japanese silk is late, and I still haven't decided which shoes to wear, because I can't decide until the silk is here! Why do I want to be a designer?"
"Because you're amazing at it, and you are going to be the most beautiful woman there!" Mina said.
Hitch laughed. "Don't I know it, and with my girls there, we're unstoppable."
"Are you sure you can't make it, Mikasa? It's our last one before we go off to college! We want you with us!" Mina said, turning to her with longing. "We're "Double H'n'M"!" Mikasa rolled her eyes, smiling, at the primary school's name they made for their friend group.
"Even for an hour?" Hitch pleaded. "No more, no less."
"I'll…think about it," Mikasa answered, truthfully.
"Better than 'no', I'll take it," Hitch said.
Mikasa bit her lip. She didn't exactly have an outfit, even if she wanted to go, but she didn't have the heart to tell them that yet. She wanted to at least graduate with the 4 of them as friends, not people she used to know.
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Second period was spent with Historia, and it was mostly listening to the teacher talk, so when the bell rung for lunch, Mikasa let out a sigh of relief.
"God, he just goes on, doesn't he?" Historia said.
"Agreed, I thought my ears were going to fall off," Mikasa replied.
"And he wonders why most of us fail the tests…"
They followed the cascade of students flowing from the classrooms toward the locker rooms. Historia did a quick jog to catch up.
"Hey, where are you going in such a hurry for lunch? You've been doing it, lately, us not seeing you at lunch at all. Where do you go?"
Mikasa shrugged, eyes downcast.
"Nowhere, out, in my car…"
"You eat in your car?"
"Well, no…"
"You're a terrible liar, Mikasa, you know it." Historia grabbed her arm and pulled her to the side of the hallway, against the wall.
"Hey, wait, I need to go."
"Where, Mikasa? This is our senior year, don't flake out on us now!"
"I'm not flaking out; I just found another place to eat quietly. Is that so bad?"
"It's not, but we'd like to see you without a teacher droving about events of the 1800's in the background. Is that so bad?"
Snapping her mouth shut, Mikasa turned away.
"We're friends, right?"
"Yes," Mikasa said, turning back.
"Then tell me what's going on!"
"Fine…"
"…"
"…"
"You are doing what?!"
"Yeah… see, not flaking out."
"Yeah, um, no. One does not simply "flake out" on one's friends to go and hang out with emfive, /emthat's emfive/em, Mikasa, super attractive guys without saying anything; that's straight up strongembetrayal/em/strong!"
Suddenly a little concerned, Mikasa stepped back.
"You dare keep such a secret from us! You dare not invite us along! You dare keep them to yourself!?"
"I wanted to be alone, all they do is play, I just listen."
"And watch, Mikasa. You watch! Guys playing instruments, a literal rock band. You also, watch!"
"I can't tell if you're mad at me or not…" Mikasa admitted.
"I'm not mad, just blown away by your sweet innocence…"
"Innocence? Never mind. I just enjoy hearing them play and they're…really nice to me. They mostly keep to themselves, too, which is why the band room is closed at lunch. It's nice to be away from the crowds…"
Historia stared at her for a bit, before sighing.
"You know I'll understand that either way." She playfully bat at Mikasa's arm. "But a heads-up next time, is all I ask, as well as an entry to hear them play at some point."
"I'll ask…"
Historia smirked.
"I'm expecting some amazing gossip coming from you, especially about which ones you fantasize about." Historia dramatically sighed and feinted.
"You're so dramatic…"
"Which is why I get the leads in theatre." She turned and started to walk away, down the hall toward the cafeteria. "See you in fourth!" She waved her hand.
Mikasa waved back and checked her watch.
"Shit. Late."
She hurried through the corridors, grabbing her lunch on the way, and knocked on the band room door 5 minutes later.
She opened it and shut it behind her, before placing her bento on the desk she deemed her lunch table.
"Ackerman, you're late. Please explain to the class why such tardiness?" Reiner said, face deadpan, arms crossed.
Hiding a smile, Mikasa mimicked his stance.
"Well, for emyour /eminformation, I was talking to Historia."
The act dropped immediately, causing the other 4 to snort in laughter.
"You were? What about?"
"About how attractive you all are…" She technically wasn't lying, and she didn't know where this playful attitude was coming from, but the reactions were worth it. They had frozen like statues, eyes wide, mouths open in stunned silence.
Without thinking, Mikasa burst out with laughter. She felt tears sting her eyes, her stomach and lungs hurt, and she couldn't stop. This caused them to be stunned even further; simply watching as she let out a sound, she hadn't heard herself in what felt like years.
"I'm-I'm sorry, it's just you guys looked so funny. I've never seen…I've just." She cut herself off to breath deep to stop the giggles. "I've never seen you guys look so scared."
"We weren't scared! Just surprised by your answer, I guess," Porco snapped back, clearly annoyed that it had flustered him.
"Either way, pretty funny," she concluded.
"Whatever…" Porco started over to his guitar and started to fiddle with it.
As each of the others started to do the same, Mikasa went to sit down and eat her lunch. With the adrenaline gone, she did feel slight embarrassment for showing such energy in front of them, but it felt…enlightening to get it off her chest. To laugh with pure joy, pure humour.
As she observed the band getting ready, she noticed they didn't act any different, didn't glare at her for laughing loudly, or watching as they argued to near breaking point; they treated her normally. Equally. It warmed her in a way, and she wondered why she's never felt this way with the girls…
Snapping out of her spiraling thoughts, knowing they would just cause unnecessary anxiety, she focused back on the band and watched as they discussed.
"Should we start with 'The Tragedy'? Acoustics are better in this room."
"We can, but I seriously want to hear what 'Blind Lane' sounds like with the rattle."
"Do you think any of these songs are good for the festival?"
"They wouldn't have asked us to play there if they didn't like our work…"
"I get that, but this is a pretty serious gig!"
"At least we get out an hour early. We'll be well prepared and set up before the festival starts…"
Finally soaking in the contents of the conversation, Mikasa stood up abruptly, causing them to look at her.
"You alright? See a spider or something?" Porco wondered.
Narrowing her eyes, Mikasa slowly sat back down.
"I'm not scared of spiders…I just…didn't know you guys were playing at the festival…"
"Figured we'd keep it a surprise until you got there," Marcel added. "Don't think we kept it from you purposefully."
She shook her head.
"I didn't…" Biting her lip, Mikasa crossed her ankles, self-consciously. "I wasn't actually planning on going…"
This caused them to appear more silent than usual.
"Wait, you're not going?" Reiner questioned.
"Well, I said I wasn't planning on it…"
"In other words, 'not going'," Porco said pointedly. "Why the hell not?"
"We graduate this year!" Marcel said.
"I know-."
"You can't miss the last festival with your class!"
"Technically, I don't really-."
"Did the girls not invite you? That's harsh…"
"That's not it, I just don't-."
"If we weren't going, would you go!?" Marcel blabbed, suddenly concerned. "You don't want to see us there?"
"NO! Marcel-."
"I knew it, we're embarrassing!"
"MARCEL!"
"Calm down, dude. You're acting like she broke your heart…" Porco chided.
"I think she did…" Marcel whimpered.
"GUYS!" Mikasa bellowed.
They turned to her.
"It has NOTHING to do with you! I don't like crowds, I don't like people, I don't have best friends, really, to spend it with without feeling like a dark cloud following them around. It makes me feel…insignificant, drowned, like I can't breathe deep enough. I feel…" Mikasa paused in her explanation. Now that she says it out loud, it seemed pretty…pathetic. She understood that her anxieties tended to veil her brain, her common sense, but never felt…ashamed of it, until now.
Was this the point where they finally realized just how crazy and isolated, she really was? Where they see how deep her scars really are?
Is this the point where they finally look at her with weariness, just like the girls do?
Closing her eyes, not wanting to meet judgement in their stares, Mikasa sighed.
I did it…I just ruined possibly the most amazing thing I've had in years…No, it ruined it… Her stupid tendency to over think and consider every possible outcome, good or bad, has officially taken control…and she let it.
Hearing footsteps walk to just in front of her, Mikasa opened her eyes and looked up into the green orbs she has thought about more then she cared to admit, even to herself.
"You could've just said that to begin with…"
"Say what? 'Hey, guys, I'm too scared to go to the biggest event in the fall because people will stare at and talk about me. Hope you have a blast!'" Mikasa put her bento down, suddenly not really hungry.
A flash of what looked like hurt came across his face but was too quick to disappear for Mikasa to get a solid read.
"That's what worries you?"
Any other time, Mikasa would be inconsolable under the intense gaze of he who is Eren, but this concern, this curiosity into her anxiety was making her feel like she was under a microscope.
"Why would you feel worried about that? Most girls want to be looked at when they dress up," Porco added.
"Mikasa isn't exactly like most girls…" Reiner said.
Mikasa looked to them, not quite sure what was meant.
"Thank you?"
"That may have come out a little worse then I intended…"
"You don't need to dress up, is what I think our dense blockhead was trying to say," Marcel said, crossing his arms, ignoring the glare Reiner threw his way. "It is tradition, but Reiner is right, you're anything but 'traditional'."
Mikasa felt a smile spread on her face.
"That sounds a lot better than 'Mikasa's isn't like other girls.'"
"Ouch!"
Eren still hadn't stopped looking at her, even as she conversed to the men behind him. She tilted her head up to him.
"If you want, I'll go to see you play. I was talking to Hitch and Mina, and I said I would think about it. It's just, even if I do, I don't want to stick out in plain clothes…"
"I want you to want to go, not because we asked you to."
"I don't have a yukata!" she blurted. "I don't want to be there and have every other girl, looking pretty and done up, to stare at me and wonder why I'm there, whether I go with the girls or with you, I'd stand out…"
The boy's looked on indignantly, then started all talking at once.
"What's so bad about standing out?"
"Why, exactly, would you stand out with us?"
"You don't have a yukata? You?"
"Which girls are we talking about?"
"You don't need a yukata to look pretty!"
Mikasa gritted her teeth at herself.
There I go again! Honestly, what is with these guys? Why do I act so out-of-character in front of them? I'm self-destructing, I'm finally snapping! That's what this is right?
She looked up and saw all eyes on her. Eren's, especially, were trying to burn a hole clean through her.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't burden you with my thoughts and problems. You should play 'The Tragedy', because it pretty must just sums up how I feel…"
"What are friends for?" Bertoldt, quiet most of the whole conversation, asked.
Mikasa gaped at him.
"Friends?"
"Well, yeah. Do you think we thought you a personal cheerleader?"
Mikasa gasped.
"Well, now that you put it that way…"
"Bertoldt!?"
"What the hell, man. You're giving her ideas!"
"We promise that's not what this is, Mikasa!"
"We would never take advantage like that!"
"You believe us to be monsters!?"
Mikasa started to laugh again, causing the heckling to cease. Realizing her action, Mikasa covered her face.
"There you go again. Making me act like a fool."
"For laughing?"
"I think you're a fool for saying that…" Mikasa looked back up to Eren, who finally decided to speak. "They're all right to ask these questions, but as well, you are permitted to how you feel. It's not just the yukata, or who you're with when you socialize, it's about who sees you, who hears you. I can see it when you're with us, even when I see you around the halls…You try to make yourself invisible, because all you hear is whispers, all you see is glares and snarls, all you feel is trapped.
"I don't know what happened to make you think that your insignificant, but I can tell you that you aren't. You may not want it, you may hate it, but there's a mystery to you, Mikasa, that draws people in. We've been a band for 3 years now, we've never let anyone, much less a woman, infiltrate our quintet. But then we met you… Something about running into you twice before you even knew what I looked like and never making eye contact until you had stumbled through the band room door with all of us in it. It makes me think, ironically, that you were meant to meet all of us, to listen in to the song we were playing. To be drawn to us as we are to you. So, never think yourself insignificant, never believe your drowning again, because now you have 5 people, who think you very significant and beautiful in every way, to help you swim…"
.
.
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What…what do I say to that? Why does my heart ache? Why…
They only continued to stare, awaiting her response to Eren's sudden deep outburst. He certainly didn't bother beating around the bush.
Why do I want to cry and laugh all at the same time? And, for God's sake, why…
"Hey, Eren, maybe we should…"
"Should we, like, leave or…?"
They tensed when they saw her head turn upwards.
Why is he looking at me like that?
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.
.
"Thank you…"
That's all she could think of.
"Thank you…for your words and consideration."
There was a silence after her words, no one really wanting to speak and break this suffocating atmosphere in case of making it more awkward.
When it was Eren to speak next, there was more than one person who was surprised.
"Are you going to be home after school?"
Mikasa flushed. "Of course, um, but I thought that Porco and Marcel had family coming so there was no band practice?"
"There isn't, I just need to drop something off if that's alright? It's…from my mom…"
His hesitation, and the telling nervous sign of his -at least to the boys- of rubbing the nape of his neck, their eyebrows rose in question. Although, knowing Eren fully well, from his broodiness to his short tempered, possessive nature, they chose to remain silent.
"How nice," Mikasa gasped. "I will be home, so will my brother, so I will have to make it quick."
"Don't want us to meet?" Eren wondered aloud, looking to the ceiling in thought.
Mikasa flushed intensely, while the band decided now was the time to intervene.
"Eren, hey, maybe dial it back a little bit and just be patient…" Reiner murmured placing a hand on his shoulder and steering him away slightly. "You clearly see her insecurities with herself, she may ignore words shot at her, but it doesn't mean they don't hurt. She does care what people think of her, I can imagine, especially her brother. So based on that assumption, we're still one of her insecurities…"
Eren glared at him.
"I'll be right back, I'm just going to the cafeteria to heat up my lunch," Mikasa suddenly announced and grabbed her bento and made her exit, quickly, before any of them could respond. This action made Eren frown.
"I'm not a patient man…"
"Believe me, I know, but…"
Eren's eyes narrowed. "But what?"
"You are probably going to hurt me after I say this…"
"Try your luck?"
Reiner sighed and shot a look at the others. A silent order to busy themselves, tune the two of them out, they obeyed knowingly.
"It's not just me that sees it, Eren, the way you look at her."
Eren's eyes widened. "What do you mean? What look?"
Reiner smirked. "Of course you wouldn't know. Your eyes, Eren, they light up when she walks into the room. I can see your walls just collapse in front of her, bow to her. Your eyes are almost always on her when you're in the same room…"
Surprisingly, the green-eyed teen suddenly flushed and turned away.
"I didn't even realize…" Eren muttered. "How obvious I was being…"
"Even you couldn't hide the image of love at first eye-contact…"
Eren snorted. "I hate you, Reiner…"
"I know, buddy, I love you, too. Believe me when I say this, Eren, you don't want to rush this. You want to experience every awkward moment, every 'shared eye-contact and turn away' sequence, because in the end, it'll be worth it."
"I can't just lay a claim like that. She needs to be free to make her own choices, to choose me only because she wants to. And besides…" Suddenly not being able to help the embarrassment, he covered his heating face. "She finds the rest of them attractive, too."
Reiner bellowed out a laugh, so loud the rest of them jumped.
"Reiner!" Eren snapped out.
"I-I'm sorry! That was just so unlike you! I can't believe it, Eren Jaeger is actually getting flustered over a girl!"
"Reiner!" Eren growled.
The blonde stopped laughing immediately and faced the fuming Eren rigidly. He knew Eren's 'I will literally annihilate you if you speak one more word' voice quite well, as it was mostly directed at him.
"Okay, okay, I'm done, I'm sorry." Reiner cleared his throat, nervously. "It's just those eyes that you make when you look at her-."
The band room door opened and Mikasa crept in and eyed them as she sat down at her table to eat. Reiner lost almost all of Eren's attention immediately as he eyed her subtly. The blonde sighed.
"Well, I'll just say, she has them, too." Eren turned to him. "When she looks at you."
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His words
Mikasa heard a honk from the car behind her as she waited for the now green light. Putting a hand up to her rearview she accelerated through the intersection. I can't get them out of my head.
"You try to make yourself invisible."
"You think that you're insignificant. You aren't."
"There's a mystery to you, Mikasa, that draws people in."
"You were meant to meet all of us."
"Now you have 5 people, who think you very significant and beautiful in every way, to help you swim…"
Why did he…comfort me? I was being a fool. I was being unreasonable
"What are friends for?"
Pulling into the garage of her townhouse, Mikasa reminisced on Bertoldt's statement. Pondering it, she unloaded her bag, took off her shoes, whilst saying hello to Rogue as always. She grabbed some leftover fried rice from the fridge, noticing a note on it from Levi. Obviously, he wasn't going to be home until later. She made her way to her room, Rogue tailing.
He called me their friend. None of them denied it. Although they were too busy from the cheerleader comment…
Mikasa crossed her arms as she sat at her desk with her snack. Frowning, she dug in, deep in thought. Stupid boys… Not that I was expecting any different…or was I?
Almost chocking on her food, she recognized something. Here I was admiring them for treating me equally when I was doing to opposite. I can't just assume that they are typical.
"You're anything but 'traditional'."
That's what Marcel said. It made me…happy when he did. Which means, I want to do the same. They aren't like any others I've met, which isn't really saying much, but it's enough.
Trying to recall the conversation again and stopping at the point where she walked out to warm up her lunch. She sighed.
It all feels like a blur after that, I can't even remember…
Her train of thought collided with a sudden recollection. When she entered the room again, she saw immediately that Eren and Reiner were in an intense interaction. Her eyes are usually drawn to him instinctively, so it was the first thing she noticed. She remembered thinking, "What are they talking about", and as if by fate, Eren looked directly at her, with a look she couldn't process, couldn't put into words. A look of frustration and longing all at the same time, and even more, blushing horrendously. Whatever they were talking about was striking all of Eren's nerves, he looked so vulnerable. She'd never get that look out of her head. Naturally, the look disappeared as quickly as she had a few minutes earlier when he turned back to Reiner.
She felt so unsettled afterward, so rattled. It made her heart race and that liquid pooled deep in her core and continued to simmer through the rest of lunch break. /
Putting her utensils down, Mikasa leaned back in her chair.
What were they talking about?
The doorbell rung and Mikasa jumped in her seat, Rogue sat up and let out a growl of warning.
"It's alright, buddy."
Getting up from her desk, Mikasa started to head downstairs. Maybe it was Petra, and she forgot her novel here or something, or maybe it's one of the officers from Levi's work…
Different scenarios were running through her head, she barely bat an eye opening the door. She stood in the threshold with her shirt disheveled from school, her skirt riding up her waist, her hair out of its braid and flowing down her back, to find Eren.
"Gah, Eren!"
"I did tell you today, didn't I?"
Immediately, Mikasa remembered, and she blushed. "Sorry, I just…uh…was surprised."
"Uh-huh." Eren nodded.
Steeling her nerves Mikasa looked up to face him. She noticed he was looking at the ground rather intensely. Almost exactly how she looked when she talked to herself in her head.
"Here." He suddenly handed her a box, wrapped in silver. She took it, in shaky hands, and stared at it.
"What-what is it?"
"Open it and find out, Mikasa."
Feeling a little overwhelmed, Mikasa unwrapped the silver paper and moved to sit at the patio set on the deck. Eren took it upon himself to join her. She opened the box and moved the protective tissue aside to reveal…
"Oh, Eren!" Putting her hands to her mouth in shock, Mikasa faced him. "You didn't have to- I mean, your mom didn't-."
"Don't think about it. It's yours to keep. It was one of my moms from when she was in high school. She truly loved that one in particular. You'll see why when you take it out," Eren said.
Speechless, Mikasa placed the box on the side table and stood up, pulling the beautiful yukata with her. It flowed down to its full size and Mikasa felt breathless. It was a beautiful ivory colour with golden lining, and it was covered in white hibiscus.
"It's…breathtaking. White hibiscus, it means… 'delicate beauty', white meaning 'pure'." Mikasa didn't think about what she was saying. She didn't know what to do or how to react in this situation. "I can't even…"
Eren stood up from his seat and walked to her. "Thank you will suffice… for now."
"What does that mean?"
He shrugged in response. "No idea."
"So cryptic…"
He smiled.
Her eyes widened and she tried to drink it all in before it disappeared, when she saw it grow into a toothy grin. She looked to his eyes and she saw him watching her.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked.
Not being able to think up an excuse, she blurted, "You're smiling."
His eyes widened a bit and it dropped a little. "Yeah…"
"I just really like it when you smile…"
He turned away before Mikasa could revel in the redness overtaking his face.
"Well, I guess I could more often, but there are always certain conditions to be met to make me smile.
Feeling a sudden ease wash over her. Like this was the most fascinating but natural thing in the world, Mikasa cocked a hip. "Which conditions are these?"
"Well, usually it involves the people I'm with. I guess I'm selfish that way…Or maybe I am just a broody fool that doesn't find much joy in life. I smile when I'm laughing with my friends, I smile when I talk about certain things with my mom, I smile when I'm singing and playing music…" He turned back toward her. "I smile when I think of you."
Putting a hand to her racing heart, Mikasa sucked in a breath. "I make you smile?"
Proving her point, Eren chuckled. "That was easier to admit then I expected, believe me. But yeah, you do. Your kind, strong and anyone who can tolerate Reiner for more than 10 minutes is a godsend in my books."
Mikasa started to laugh and Eren watched, utterly bewitched.
"He is funny, got to admit," she responded.
"In his eyes…" Eren muttered darkly.
"You know…" Mikasa suddenly changed the topic. "I can't stop thinking about what Bertoldt said."
For some reason, Eren's heart dropped.
"What do you mean?"
"He said 'what are friends for?'"
"He did."
"I can't help overthinking it, but is that really how you all see me?" she asked.
Eren hesitated.
"What?" Mikasa questioned.
"Nothing. I mean, yes, we're friends."
Mikasa's throat closed. "I'm sensing a 'but'."
Eren suddenly turned and stepped away from her.
"It's nothing, alright? No 'but's, we're…friends."
Why is he riled up all of a sudden? Did I say something wrong? Does one of the boys not see me as a friend? Do they not like me?
"I'm sorry if I overstepped, I didn't mean to. I shouldn't have taken what he said to heart, I guess. I didn't intend to-."
"It's not like that!" Eren snapped.
Flinching, Mikasa stepped back.
Noticing, Eren closed his eyes and took a breath, attempting to reel in his temper.
"I didn't mean to snap, okay? I am just…" Realizing she wasn't going to speak, Eren sighed deeply. "We're friends, Mikasa, don't ever doubt that, at least. I'll see you tomorrow."
He walked off the patio and down the driveway. She watched him, waiting for him to turn back around. He didn't. And she spent the rest of the night wondering why it hurt so much that he hadn't.
.
.
.
When Eren entered his house, he knew instantly that dinner was ready. He was hungry, but he didn't really feel like facing his mother after how things went with his little errand.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, Carla knew the second Eren was home.
"Eren, come in here and help me dish up!" she called from the kitchen.
Sighing, he removed his shoes and jacket, before heading to face the music.
When he entered, his mother was stirring something in a saucepan and reading through something on her cellphone.
"Isn't that a little dangerous?" he asked.
She turned and beamed at him, he couldn't help but smile back in return.
"Not for someone as experienced in multitasking as me, I raised you after all."
"You won't dare let me forget it."
"How'd it go?"
Those dreaded words right off the bat. He certainly didn't get his bluntness from his father.
"Fine…"
Her hands stopped stirring and Eren heard her phone click off. He was in for it…
"Shall I spare you the fanatics and just skip to saying, 'tell me right the hell now?'
Eren scoffed. "Why do you need to know?"
Carla turned to her son fully and crossed her arms. "I'm your mother, I know you better than you know yourself, need I say more?"
"What does that even mean?"
"It means that I have never seen you walk a girl home, or hang out with one in general, forgive me for wondering what makes her so special. That's not even mentioning you coming in today and stuttering out the question of if I had a yukata a friend could borrow…"
"Mom!" Eren complained. "Are you trying to kill my self confidence here?"
"I'm not, Eren, I've just got this feeling is all. If you don't want to tell me, that is fine, I won't pry. But can I ask you one thing?" Carla asked, turning back to the stove.
"What's that?"
"I do hear some conversations between you and your band, you're so loud sometimes, it's hard not to. They've even brought girls over themselves, of course, they never stuck around very long, regardless, even from the small interaction I saw between you all, and from what I've heard the guys say since then, as well as your sudden mood change-."
"Mood change?"
"-I can tell there's something different about her."
"Mom, I'm not hearing a question."
"Such density. What makes her so special, Eren?"
Eren didn't say anything for a moment, and Carla let him ponder. He wouldn't leave her with nothing, but he did tend to be quite vague.
"I don't know, Mom. There's just something about her. Something special, as you said. I intend to find out what it is, because I want to know just as much as you."
.
.
.
The next day, Mikasa was disappointed to say, was lonely, and quite sad on a personal level.
She started off her day with her usual morning routine, Levi made French Toast for breakfast with mochas, but the minute she got to school, the script was flipped.
Mikasa dropped her things off in her locker and decided she would visit with Historia, Hitch and Mina for the morning before homeroom, to catch up and to break the news that she was going to the festival. They were happier about it then she thought they would be. They jumped around her, hugged her and thanked her for considering it. Despite everything, they learned that it was harder for Mikasa to come to this decision then she was letting on.
Homeroom went by naturally fast, as well as first period, but once Second rolled around and she sat in her English class with Hitch and Mina, she noticed that Porco and Marcel were acting…off.
Even if they knew she was going to sit on the other side of the room, they still smiled and waved when she entered.
They did neither, in fact, they didn't even look at her. It was more than a little concerning to her.
Every now and then, she would turn hoping to get some kind of assurance that they will explain things at lunch, they didn't do that either. Were they ignoring her? Why?
The second the bell had rung for lunch, Mikasa hurried into the band room. When she entered, she immediately sensed some tension. They greeted her, Mikasa didn't bother to bring up class with the Galliard brothers, and almost immediately got to practicing.
She ate her lunch silently as they played, but they didn't seem as into it.
When the bell had rung for Third period, they packed their things and started to depart. As they exited the room, Reiner suddenly grabbed Mikasa's arm and pulled her the opposite direction. /
"Wah? Reiner!"
"Shh! Just come with me!"
Not being able to help but follow, Mikasa allowed him to lead her into an empty classroom, further down the hall. He pulled the door shut and whipped around to face her.
"What is going on today?" Mikasa snapped out. "You guys are being weird! First Porco and Marcel completely ignore me in Second period, you barely acknowledged me or the music you were playing just now, and now you are secretly talking to me alone because…?"
"I wanted to start off by saying 'apologies', and that don't think too much into the Galliards behaviour…"
"Why?" Mikasa questioned. Reiner pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Well, I can't really say much about it, it's not my place; I can tell you that, well, it's not really emeveryone/em that's acting off, it's just…Eren. The others can sense it and, well…"
Mikasa faced the ground, eyes wide with concern. She flashbacked to their conversation on her deck; the very reason she was going to the festival; the way the conversation ended…
"It's because of me…" she mumbled.
Reiner placed a hand on her shoulder. "Eren just…doesn't deal with emotions very well and sometimes it is emvery/em obvious. We are all just trying to give him space."
"Then why did Porco and Marcel ignore me in Second period?"
Reiner hesitated. "They knew something was off, like I said. They don't know what happened, Eren won't say, but they clearly have their own assumptions. Maybe they thought it best that…well, if, this is an if, Mikasa, you are part of the reason, then Eren should be the one to talk to you about it first. They wouldn't have been able to help their curiosity. Out of respect for you and Eren, they kept their distance."
"That's stupid," Mikasa scoffed.
Reiner shrugged. "Maybe, but I never said Eren was the only one that didn't deal with emotions in the best way; we all have our ways."
"If Eren hasn't said anything to you guys about it, none of you can actually know what he's thinking…"
"No, that's true. But…" Reiner leaned back against the door, causing Mikasa to look back up at him. "I have known Eren long enough to see how he deals with situations. Most of the time, he retorts in anger, frustration, the other times he doesn't even care enough to bother with it, he just brushes it off with his usual glare and with nonchalance. Although, there was a few handfuls of times where he did react in an abnormal way; fights with his mother; serious arguments with us…"
"Those are sad scenarios…" Mikasa murmured.
"Yes, but Eren cared enough to fight back, to negotiate instead of instigating. Because I've known him for so long, I can see it when he's rattled, anxious, and well, whatever it is that you think you did, if you did, it's got him rattled."
Mikasa turned away and started to pace the classroom. "It was so silly. I don't even know what happened to make him suddenly…" Mikasa sighed in defeat.
"Snap?"
Mikasa faced him again, a few feet away and leaned on a desk. "Yes. It was so sudden, one second, he was smiling at me and the next…" Mikasa gestured with her hands. "It was like it never happened."
Reiner nodded knowingly. "Yeah, I can see it now. Do you mind me asking, what happened?"
"What happened to respect?"
"I also said we wouldn't be able to help curiosity."
"You did say that. Fine…"
So, she recounted the conversation, the receiving of the yukata- she couldn't help but gush about it a little- and how it had concluded with Eren storming down the driveway.
When she had finished, she noticed Reiner was rubbing a temple.
"That maniac…"
"What?"
Reiner sighed. "Nothing, he's, honestly, being a little dramatic. I swear, in one ear and out the other, hey, Eren?"
Reiner started to be the one to pace.
"What are you talking about?"
"Here's my advice." Reiner suddenly stopped dead in his tracks, crossed his arms. "Confront him about it."
Mikasa paled. "No, no, I can't do that. I'll only anger him more, I don't want to do that, I never wanted to do it in the first place. If I stir the pot, it could make him start to hate me and then I won't be able to hang out anymore. I just can't do it!"
Reiner walked to her, grabbed her shoulders once again. "You have to if you're going to get through to him. Eren's a hothead, he doesn't listen to reason, usually. You got to set it straight."
An anxiety attack was starting to happen, she could feel it. Her heart pounding, the blood in her ears roaring, her breaths hitching.
No, no, you are not doing this now, Mikasa thought to herself. You can't resort to panic every time your faced with conflict, faced with a need of self-preservation. You need to just breathe.
Something in her mind clicked and she remembered the assembly that had taken place last week. When she was hit with claustrophobia and anxiety, Eren had snapped her out of it, simply by talking to her, grounding her in the spot.
That's all it is, right? I just need to ground myself…
Mikasa took a deep breath, replaying Eren's words in her head, to the best of her abilities.
"Just take a deep breath. You're alright. If you must, close your eyes."
"Just focus on your center and breathe. Listen to your heartbeat, your lungs allowing air into you. Your feet on the ground, your hands by your side…"
She repeated the mantra in her head but used Eren's voice; she found it calmed her a lot more than her own.
"I don't want to put pressure on you, but it is, really, the only way to resolve this. It's not as big a deal as you are making it out to be…" Reiner assured.
Meeting Reiner's nectar eyes, Mikasa crossed her arms, as calm as she could be. "I don't even know what made him upset, how can I apologize if I don't know what I'm doing it for?"
At this. Reiner dropped his eyes and smiled. "You don't need to apologize, just tell him not to look too deep into it."
"Why would I say that? I want him to think of me as a friend…"
"He does, but I think he took it a little…too literally? If you know what I mean…"
Mikasa narrowed her eyes. "I really don't…What are you trying to say here, Reiner?"
Sighing, he chuckled. "You are, truly, just as dense as him. Maybe I've said too much…"
There was a silence that stretched on before Reiner started to walk forward.
"Listen, forget about what I said. Eren will come around, he usually does…eventually, but it won't be for you to worry about. The boys and I will get him back to his usual self before the festival tomorrow." He strode past her and slid the door open, embracing the chatter that floated through halls. "And hey, even if we can't, I know the festival will surely do the trick in the end…"
He walked out, leaving Mikasa stewing in annoyance and curiosity. Something made her think she was missing something…
What the hell was that weirdo on about?
.
.
.
3rd period was free for Mikasa, so she used her time wisely in the library. She reveled in the alone time; not even the girls were around.
When the bell rung for the last period of the day, Mikasa sighed and packed her things. She couldn't help but stew a little on Reiner and her's conversation and still wondered what he knew that she didn't. He acted more aloof than usual, and it unsettled her; not mentioning the fact that there was no band practice today after school.
Tells me not to worry…I can't help it. Why did things have to get so awkward? Am I overthinking it? Maybe they will resolve this on their own…
She made her way through the halls and down the stairs to the bottom floor of the school, where the change rooms, weight and cardio rooms, and gymnasium resided.
At least I can end the day with a good workout… she thought to herself as she entered the girls change room.
Opening her locker, she grabbed her gym set and piled her side bag into it, closing it.
.
.
.
Mikasa had always been an athletic person, more so than people think. She has her daily jogs; she works out with Levi when she has the time- being chief has its physical demands and expectations- and she tends to do yoga on mellower days; it helps with the anxiety.
Not many students choose to use their "physical education" time in the workout rooms; girls let their ego get the best of them and the boys usually do as well, with different aspects. Also, with choices like California Kickball, Badminton, and track-and-field, students tended to gravitate towards outdoors and teamwork related activities.
She entered the cardio room, thinking that a run on the treadmill to get her heart pumping would do her good for a warm-up, when she halted.
He easily filled any room with his height, so she spotted him immediately. Part of her was actually happy about it, of all the band members of Titanic Devils,Bertoldt's energy was the most…chill.
She made her way over, hoping he'd notice her first, but he seemed invested in something on his phone, as usual. Now that she thought about it, whenever Bertoldt wasn't playing the drums, studying or conversing, he was texting.
I wonder who…?
"Oh, hey, Mikasa."
Her name brought her thoughts back, and she faced the jade eyes of his.
"Hello, sorry, I don't want to interrupt…"
Clicking his phone off and pocketing it, Bertoldt shook his head. "No interrupting here, I'm glad you're here actually."
"You are?"
He nodded. "I wanted to ask you how you were, as well as apologize on behalf of my brothers in arms, they are a lot more…chaotic than most people think and tend to overwhelm most females."
Mikasa smiled softly. "Well, I appreciate that, and you for asking. I'm fine, but I just wish things could go back to the way they were. I've talked to Reiner, but I feel just more confused now."
Bertoldt was easy to talk to. He listened attentively and his demeanor was calming. She ranted a little about her last conversations with those involved in the band and whenever she looked to him to gauge his reaction, all she saw was understanding. He didn't interrupt or even ask questions, just took it in.
When she concluded her final thought, she sighed. "What do I do?"
Bertoldt shifted against the wall he was leaning on and crossed his arms. "Will you hear me out for a second? Hear an outsider's point of view?"
She nodded, eagerly. "Please."
"Let me start with your conversation with Eren, on your deck. You received the yukata, you were excited, touched by something Eren did for you. In this regard, Eren was completely out of character; I'm sure you can gather that much from talking to him and what we've said about him. This was on a more intimate scale than he's used to, so it also confused him."
"Why?"
Bertoldt shrugged. "Maybe he asked himself the same question. 'Why?' Why did he go out of his comfort zone to give you a gift? I only say this because I understand where he's coming from, and why he's being…chaotic…"
"You mean 'stupid'?"
Bertoldt chuckled. "Regardless, Eren doesn't choose friends lightly, and he doesn't take being hurt by someone easily either…"
"Wait, I hurt him? How? What was it that I said?!"
Taking her shoulders, Bertoldt stopped her down spiral. "I meant it in different phrasing, I'm sorry. I mean it in a way that you don't understand yet. The thing is, Mikasa, is that boys can be fools when it comes to the right person and sometimes, we say and do things we aren't proud of, or known for doing; we especially don't like talking about it. The reason I understand him so well, is because I've been in his shoes. In fact, it's almost uncanny how alike our situations are…" Bertoldt trailed off, before shaking his head.
"Look at me spouting all of this to you, you really do have that effect, you know."
Mikasa couldn't help but smile. "I'm glad you shared with me. I want to learn all about you guys in time. I'm hoping, truly, that we can become good friends. I am curious to know, though…"
"What?"
"What part of Eren's behaviour are you relating to, exactly? I mean, did you cause a misunderstanding between someone and yourself?"
Bertoldt tensed. "I was not expecting you to ask that…uh." He seemed to get uneasy and stood straight, shifting his feet. "Not necessarily a misunderstanding, but I guess, looking too far into something that she says, or you say, in Eren's case…"
"She?"
Face reddening, Bertoldt rubbed the nape of his neck. "Listen, remember when I also said we don't like to talk about things…"
Mikasa cocked a hip. "Remember when I just poured out my heart and soul to you, and you actually helped a little; maybe I can help you, who is she?"
"I don't really want to say…"
"She goes to this school?"
"Yes."
"Is she in our grade? Come on, give me something here."
"You're just trying to change the topic now; you don't need to be burdened with all of my baggage. Make up with Eren first, then maybe you can help me."
Huffing, Mikasa moved toward the treadmill.
"Mikasa." She turned. "My advice on what you should do, talk to him, away from everyone. Don't do it at school, but do it soon." She nodded slowly.
"Thank you."
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.
That evening, when Mikasa was at home absentmindedly staring at the yukata on her closet door, she stewed. The whole day had been one giant circus, and she wasn't, really, any closer to figuring out how to approach Eren about their last conversation. She thought maybe calling, texting? Hell, should she just send a carrier pigeon?
She replayed Reiner and Bertoldt's advice in her head and cringed outwardly. They both had suggested confronting him in some way and she wasn't the greatest at that, presently.
Why do things need to be so awkward? Mikasa thought, starting to pace her room. Her door started to edge open which she knew meant Rogue was nudging his way into her space; he didn't enter her room until she said, "Come."
The German Shepard came through the doorway, making his way over to her bed, and sitting beside it.
Taking this as the invitation it was, Mikasa settled onto the bed next to him and he laid his head in her lap.
"You're good at that, you know," Mikasa murmured to the canine. "Sensing when I'm on the verge of losing my mind to panic, usually, but also whenever I need someone with me." Rogue nuzzled against her hand, probing scratches from it. Mikasa sighed and laid back onto her bed, still petting Rogue's head. "I don't know what to do…"
Without meaning to, Mikasa's eyes drifted to a close and she slipped away.
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.
When Mikasa arose, her room had a bright orange hue, curtesy of the setting autumn sun. She had shifted into a curled-up position at the foot of her bed, with Rogue snoring away at the edge on the floor. She could smell something delicious wafting through the air, knew it was Levi in the kitchen making magic, and opted for a shower before she ate.
She sat up, prompting Rogue, who stood with his tail wagging.
"Sleep well?" she mumbled. Rogue shook his head aggressively in response. Mikasa made her way to her suite and prepared it for a shower.
Once she was standing with steam fogging the room in her shower, Mikasa pondered. Again. She was notorious for it; always trying to be one step ahead of everything but dreading what comes next. It was even worse when she didn't know. Other people were so confusing, so sensitive. So different from her. They all think differently, act differently, how does she know where she fits in?
I wish I was better at this.
Mikasa started to lather her loofah with the body gel from this month's subscription package. (She can feel fancy in the shower if she wants. She doesn't expect anyone but her to smell it, but an imagination can do wonders sometimes…) She liked this scent quite a bit. Citrus, lavender, coconut, somehow mixing to create the most venomous scent.
As she scrubbed her body, her mind drifted. She wondered what other scents would be nice to try. She usually liked the fruity or flowery, but she finds herself debating what scents Eren might like. She remembers what he smells like…musky evergreen, some cinnamon maybe? There's something foreboding about it. Something dangerous. Like a drug, or a painkiller, the more you take, the more you want, and eventually you're numb to it, lost in it. Your senses being tempted away from you with every breath…
"Ding"!
Mikasa jumped so hard she almost slipped and fell. Catching herself, she braced her hands against the walls, breathing heavily.
"Christ…" She rinsed herself and turned the shower off, getting out.
She wrapped a towel in her long cascades of hair, and around her breasts before lifting her phone, which almost startled her into oblivion.
One single notification was waiting, but it knotted Mikasa's stomach. She felt it tighten when her phone turned off and she saw herself in the black screen; make-up askew, bare shoulders and a pathetic look of defeat on her face. She doesn't even know if this feeling is worse than when she heard nada from him.
Eren: Sorry for what happened. I'm okay now. I'll see you at the festival.
What kind of bullshit was that?
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.
"There! Sent! That wasn't so hard!" Reiner said gleefully, handing Eren his phone back after unlocking the bathroom door.
"What did you even say, you asshole!" Eren snatched it back, already forgetting the fact that he had just chased Reiner around the house about 4 times, before the blonde managed to slip away long enough to lock himself in the bathroom after stealing Erens phone.
The brunette read the text over and scowled. "I sound like a complete dick."
"You are."
"She doesn't need to know that!"
"She does know that. Why do you think she's scared shitless of you?"
"What!? She is not!"
"…"
"Is she?"
"In more ways then one, my friend. You got to learn how to talk to her without coming across as…"
"Eager?"
"No, I want to say possessive, but it's not quite that…"
"Reiner, if you are trying to think of a polite way to say 'desperate', I suggest you save your breath for when I knock the living shit out of you."
"Loud and clear, buddio. You just want to be yourself, let-her-come-to-you kind of thing."
"She can barely look me in the eye…"
"She can't look at any of us in the eye, Eren, but that doesn't mean she doesn't look or see you. She only does when she knows she's safe in her surroundings."
Eren's scowl darkened. "How do you know that about her?" he demanded.
"Because I observe, as should you. And another little tip?"
"I'll add it to the list…"
"Maybe try smiling more."
UGHHHH! Done! Sorry that took so long. I had intense writers block for so long and could not think of a good way to end this chapter without you being unsatisfied. I hope you like it! I don't really know how many parts this is going to be, I'll just see how it goes. I might just post more AU's in between to switch it up! Thanks for reading!
~RavenJaeger