Clark has never eaten so much fruit in his life.
His breakfast tray is filled with little cups of cubed watermelon, honeydew, and cantalope. Another cup full of grapes sits beside it, with a third housing sliced strawberries. He has a muffin, for his grains -and a little bit of sugar from the chocolate chips. Scrambled eggs and a slice of bacon complete the meal in all of his food groups, with tomato juice on the side.
Not that he needs all of his food groups. Not the way humans do. He doesn't need the right vitamins and minerals when he soaks in all his nutrients from the warm sun shining down on him. But, he likes to keep the habit regardless. It helps him feel like he's put actual thought into his meals, instead of chomping down on whatever he can get his hands on, like he did as a teen.
That's when he found out he can digest solid metal.
"You missing your mother's eggs yet?" Lois asks through a mouthful of toast.
Yesterday, Lois had been all over the breakfast buffet. She tried everything they had to offer and then some, but it seems she's already settled on her usual breakfast. Toast and coffee.
At least she's added some protein this time.
"I don't think anyone could beat my ma's eggs," Clark says. He can already smell them if he focuses enough. Bacon grease left over in the pan and seven large eggs sizzling over the gas stove. She'd add a little smoked paprika and Velveeta cheese too.
Diana sits down beside them with a meal that dwarfs Clark's by three times. He's starting to feel bad for the ship's cooks.
"Ooh, did they just put out more pancakes? I may have to-" Clark stops dead when he sees Diana's sour expression.
Lois catches it a moment later. "Hey, you good? Looks like someone pissed in your apple juice."
Clark winces at her very bold statement, but Diana's scowl falls ever so slightly as she begins sorting her utensils. She stops again to stare at Clark in the eyes, very clearly upset.
"Go talk to Bruce, would you? He has gotten on my nerves."
"Bruce?" Clark follows that familiar heartbeat from the buffet area, where Bruce should be, to their cabin. He sees the man huffing and pacing through the walls. "Uh, sure, Diana. I can-"
When he goes to stand, Diana pulls him back down in his seat. "No, eat first. It's not worth losing a meal over."
Clark does as he's told. He lets the concern float to the back of his mind as he works with Lois to cheer Diana up again. By the time he's finished his fruit cups, eggs, and an extra helping of pancakes, Clark sets his tray to be washed and waves at the girls on his way back to the cabin. Diana gives him an apologetic look, but she doesn't stop him again.
Oh joy.
Bruce only stops pacing once he hears Clark opening the door. Immediately, Bruce snaps to him and stands with his arms crossed. A cold scowl lands on the far wall beside Clark's head.
Okay, so he's not mad at Clark specifically. Hopefully, this isn't just some fight between him and Diana. He doesn't feel like playing middle-man to arguements right now.
"Bruce, what-"
"If you're here to tell me to calm down, then I don't want to hear it."
Okay, so they're starting like this.
With a sigh, Clark moves to sit on the nearest bed. "Bruce, I don't know what you're upset about. Can we start there?"
The scowl deepens. "I assumed Diana would fill you in, but I guess it's not a surprise. She obviously has other priorities." Clark doesn't answer that, leaving Bruce to fill him in himself. "We're arriving at the Bahamas in a few hours. It's the perfect opportunity to sneak into Metal Jaw's room undisturbed and find exactly what we need. We've already lost five days but Diana wants to waste another by going to the beach!"
Clark rubs his neck, trying to figure out the best way to approach this. "Bruce, I see where you're coming from, I really do, but-"
"What, you agree with her?" Bruce is already fuming again. "I can handle Lois treating this mission like a free vacation, but you and Diana are League members. You should know better."
Oh, now Clark is getting annoyed.
"Bruce, stop. We aren't disregarding the mission-"
"Diana is!"
"Will you let me speak?!" Clark snaps. Bruce crosses his arms, silent. "I know this is important stuff and we don't have forever, but you have to realize this is our first time on a cruise. I don't blame them for wanting to enjoy it a little."
Much to Clark's dismay, Bruce only grinds his foot metaphorically deeper into the ground. "Do you know how much information I've gotten from those two? Nothing. Neither Diana or Lois have found a single thing about our targets. You know what they have done? Bought seventeen drinks and five accessories between them."
"I can ask them to tone down the spending."
"This isn't about spending!" Bruce growls. "It's about wasting my time!"
Clark has to back away from the argument for a moment-
"And you agree with them." Bruce pulls him right back in.
"Yes, I agree!" Clark is careful not to activate his heat vision with how hard he's glaring. "I say we all go to the Bahamas and relax! We can swim a little, check out the shops along the coast, and relax!"
"Relax, while we miss our best chance at finding our criminals? How does that make any sense, Kent?!"
"It's one shore leave!"
"It's our only shore for the next three days!"
Clark throws his hands up. "You want a solution, fine! I will investigate Metal Jaw while you and the girls go to the beach! Then, once I'm sure I've done what I can, I'll join you for the rest of the leave!"
Bruce's scowl falters. "Clark, you don't need-"
"No, I will, because the girls deserve some time to themselves and you need to unwind!"
He's leaving, now. Bruce follows him a step but no further. Clark turns to him once he's opened the door. "Pack your shit. I'll see you when we dock."
"Clark-"
He doesn't stay to listen.
When he meets them at the line to disembark, Diana is in higher spirits and Bruce is brooding.
"We'll save you a spot," Lois promises with a raise of the extra beach towel. He really appreciates it.
"Thanks, Lois. I shouldn't be long."
Diana takes one of his hands into hers. "Are you sure you don't want someone with you? It wouldn't be right to leave you alone."
Clark squeezes her fingers between his, then lets go. "I'm sure. You just have fun, alright?"
Bruce doesn't look at him when Clark steps close enough to whisper in his ear, a hand on his shoulder. "Let them enjoy it. And I better not see you pouting when I get back." There's a bite to his tone that lingers from their argument. He backs away when Bruce doesn't respond.
"Bye, Clark! We'll see you!" Lois and Diana wave to him as he goes. He gives his best smile, ignoring the odd looks from others in the line, then heads back to his cabin until most of the guests have left the ship.
It takes thirty minutes or so. Clark listens to the way countless heartbeats and footsteps spread out over the island's shore. They gather around the kiosks first, then further into the beach. Other cruise ships have stopped as well, making the number of guests near overwhelming, but the workers on the beach are prepared for it. There's another lunch area set up for their Honeymoon Cruises, as well as cucumber water dispensers near the docks.
Clark turns his focus from the people outside to those within. He looks through the floor at room F46. It's empty.
In no time, Clark rides the elevator down and walks along the hall until he's in front of the door. He has Bruce's room-hacking program up on Bruce's phone, but it appears unneeded when he sees a cleaning crew member just leaving the room with a bundle of dirty sheets. He uses his super speed to slip in just before the door can close.
The room is a near exact copy of the one he shares, aside from the single bed and mirrored layout. An x-ray sweep shows him nothing but a typical guest's luggage. Clothes for one in the dresser provided. Toiletries in the bathroom, a wet bathing suit hung up on the shower rod to dry. A bible under the pillow-
Wait, why under the pillow?
Clark lifts the pillow and snatches the bible from underneath. He flips through the pages and only needs to go so far before a gaping hole appears in the center. Inside the pocket is a small engagement box with a ring.
Odd. Very odd.
The box and ring aren't special by any means. A tinkstum ring with polished darkwood along the edges. It's honestly a beautiful ring. He wouldn't mind getting something like this, when he gets engaged.
If. If he gets engaged.
Nothing else is within the bible, so Clark returns it to its place under the pillow and fluffs it to make it look like it was never touched at all.
The last thing Clark can possibly think of is the lead safe tucked away in the closet. So, he kneels down before the safe and starts listening closely for the sound of clicking as he turns the knob.
His focus lapses and he hears the bumbumbum of Bruce's heart way out on the beach. It's calm and slow, as always.
Clark's own heart picks up with a flash of anger. He gets that this mission is important, but Bruce is acting as if this is any other undercover mission. They're on a cruise for Rao's sake! This is a once-in-a-lifetime experience for all of them. And yes, he can already think of Bruce's grumbled replies.
"You can fly to the Bahamas any time you want."
But this is different! He doesn't just want to fly to the Bahamas, he's here on an expensive cruise! That changes the experience!
"Cruise or not, the mission comes first. You know this, Clark."
Yeah, he does. He knows this is League business and he really should be focused, but what's the honest harm in a little fun? Bruce could certainly use it.
"I don't have fun."
Yeah, sure. His kids would certainly agree.
Click.
Click? Oh! Yes, the safe.
Clark pulls the safe open and stops breathing entirely at the stash of fentanyl patches inside. He pulls out bags of the patches, then sniffs them to ensure they are exactly as labeled. Oh golly, this is bad! So much worse than he thought!
But he can't just take them. Metal Jaw would notice their stash mission and then tensions would rise. So, Clark carefully returns the bags to the safe, takes as many pictures as he can on Bruce's phone, then locks the safe again. He stands, a little light-hearted at finding exactly what they needed.
Okay, maybe Bruce was right about this being a golden opportunity, but it certainly didn't require all of them. Clark got the job done perfectly fine by himself.
With nothing else to really do until they find their second criminal. This room clearly only houses one of the two, so they'll need to follow this trail a little ways further before any arrests can be made.
Clark steps out onto the balcony and flies off the ship into the water. He zooms through the ocean in his swim trunks and flip-flops, the shirt already discarded before he investigated F46.
He passes a spread of coral reefs on his way to the beach. Clark can't help but smile at the bright green vines and purple coral. Schools of fish avoid him as they dip in and out of little crevices. A blue plant nearly brushes his knee, but Clark is quick to avoid the contact. Someone at the Daily Planet once wrote a piece about coral reefs and their deaths. It was a very important detail not to touch it.
So, Clark simply looks as he passes by.
This, here, is one of Clark's favorite parts of being Kryptonian. He can experience things a human can't. He can dive deep into the ocean and see the wonders that lie below. He can fly through space with no mind to the lack of pressure or atmosphere. He can go nearly anywhere he wants, so long as he abides by the laws of space travel. Anywhere in and out of the world.
Anywhere but home.
Clark listens for Bruce's heart again as a homing beacon. He closes in once he spots Lois' green innertube and pulls her legs down under for just a second.
She splashes and fights him until he's bringing them both back to the surface.
"Clark!" She shouts in anger, a fist hitting his shoulder over and over. "Urg! I can't believe you!"
Diana splashes over to them. "Welcome back," She says with a laugh in her voice.
Clark smiles back in kind, more than enjoying the attempts Lois makes at getting him back. "Everyone having fun without me?"
"Most of us," Diana peeks back at the beach, where Bruce is absolutely sulking. He's under the shade of a purchased umbrella with his arms crossed over his chest. By all means, he could be sleeping, but a peek through his sunglasses proved that wrong. He's glaring right at them.
For the love of Rao...
"Forget him." Clark eventually says. "We have, what, three hours until we need to be back on the ship? I'm not wasting another minute." He sinks under the water again and lifts Diana by her hips, throwing her completely out of the water and over a good few feet, where she splashes down again.
She doesn't resurface when two strong hands grab Clark's ankles and yank him down as well.
They fight-swim until Lois complains about feeling hungry. Clark's cheek hurt from laughing so hard, so he volunteers to get them all lunches as a little break before they're right back at it again. He wants to see just how hard he can throw Diana without giving away his powers.
Clark steps out of the water in slow steps. Droplets roll down his skin in stripes and sand collects on his feet as he steps into it. The sand is finer than any lake Clark's been to. He almost wants to lay down in it and soak up the heat.
The closer he gets to Bruce, the more his good spirits slip away. His smile dampens, then disappears completely by the time he grabs the extra towel to dry off at least a little.
It isn't fair. Bruce can be so damn hot, sitting here in the shade with his chesthair out and his thighs spread open, but he always has to act so -so right! The great Batman can do no wrong. He knows everything always, no matter how smart you think you are. And if he sees a problem in something, his way is the only one that makes sense. No exceptions.
It really makes Clark question why he loves the jerk so much.
"I'm getting lunch. You want some?" Clark asks in a very fragile attempt at peace. He knows Bruce won't throw the first bone. He never does.
Bruce huffs. "Cheap, old hotdogs? Sounds like the start of an epidemic."
Clark stops himself from ripping the towel in half. "You know what? Get your own damn lunch," He snaps. The sand makes it difficult to stomp away.
Several people quickly start walking again when he looks up. The stares go ignored. He knows it's childish of him to argue like this in such a public place, but he deserves to lose his temper ever so often, damn it! Especially when Bruce is so...ugh!
Clark focuses on letting it go as he grabs three plates of hotdogs, watermelon, and a cookie for each of them. By the time they've eaten and returned to the water, Clark is too distracted to stew on Bruce. At least, until they get back to the ship.
It's well past dinner and Clark sits upright in his bed as he listens to Lois and Diana take turns untying the braids they got done on shore. It was fifteen bucks each, a steep price for a few minutes of labor. And to then take it out so soon feels like a complete waste.
Then again, Clark is being overly pessimistic at the moment.
"Oh! Your hair is wavy now!" Diana beams as he holds Lois' shoulder-length strands in her fingers.
"Can't say it did much for you." Lois does the same to Diana's curls.
Rao, Clark wishes he could sit and feel Bruce's hair. He wants to run his fingers through those dark strands and admire how he's chosen to wear it over the cruise. They could look at each other the way they always do; like they've always known each other, sometimes more than they know themselves. He trusts Bruce...
A glance through the layers of the ship shows him Bruce is still sitting at the indoor bar. Alone. Nursing the same exact drink he started with.
With a sigh, Clark stands from the bed. "I'll be back," He tells the girls without stopping.
"Okay!" Lois barely acknowledges him.
"Have Hera's strength, Kal." Diana gives him a warrior's salute and it actually helps lift the crushing frustration.
All the way to the bar, Clark is preparing what he'll say. He needs to be direct, but not too direct. Play at the humor of it, if any can be found. Be honest first and foremost. Bruce won't respond well if he senses Clark is watering down or lightening his true feelings on the matter. Which will prove to be the greatest challenge of all.
All of his planning goes straight out the window when Clark sits down.
"I'm not going to apologize," Bruce speaks first. "But...maybe I've been too uptight."
Clark looks at him, unamused. That's one of Bruce's best not-apologies yet. He should get a medal.
"This is important, though. You do know that, right? You know that not solving this will only make things spread?"
"I know," Clark's voice comes out as a sigh. "But do you know why Diana and I feel so strongly about our side?"
There's a very long pause. "We're from different tax brackets," Bruce mutters eventually.
"Yes, but there's more to it." Clark shifts closer, a hand coming to also circle the shot glass. His fingers tingle where they brush Bruce's bare skin. "We're tired, Bruce. We've been solving case after case for months now. I've been rushing between my two jobs and Diana's got literal God- uh, 'you know what's, on her hands." He risks a glance around the bar, suddenly anxious of eavesdroppers.
"I know." Bruce doesn't move his hand away. If anything, he too gets closer. "I...I do know."
Their knees knock together. "Alright, let me ask you this. What if we solve the mission early? Will you still pull us out of the cruise?"
"I don't see why we'd stay, but..." Bruce bites at the dry skin on his lip, eyes wandering under his lashes. "But suppose we do. I guess there wouldn't be too much harm in getting my money's worth."
A smile pull at Clark's lips. He knew they could find a middle ground. "Then we'll settle this argument here. We keep working on this case but maybe a little fun can be had too. It sounds like a tempting deal to me." He offers his hand with a shrug.
Bruce takes it in a firm grip, but he doesn't shake yet. "Mission first, play second. Agreed?"
"Perfectly."
They shake on it and settle back into their respective seats. After Bruce has finished the last of his drink, Clark passes the waterproof phone.
Bruce lifts it and scrolls through the pictures Clark took in F46. "Jesus..."
"Mission first, Bruce. Then play. Just like I promised."
"Yeah, I suppose you did." Bruce pockets it as he stands. He slaps a random sum of bills on the counter then guides them out of the bar. "I'll apologize to Diana tomorrow. I'm too tired to do that again."
Clark genuinely laughs this time. "Beating people half to death doesn't exhaust you, but admitting fault does? No wonder you've run through so many Rob -uh, birds."
"Nice catch," Bruce snickers sarcastically. "And here I thought the speedo would give us away."
Clark blinks, stopping in the middle of the hall. "What's wrong with my swim trunks? Bruce?"
He doesn't get a reply.