Sunday, 20 October 1991
Tonks's eyes bugged out.
"A date?"
Remus's face was flushed but he nodded. Tonks felt her own face heat up; she was sure she looked like a mess, with a bogey-filled nose, puffy eyes, and tomato-red cheeks.
"A date date?" she asked, with trepidation. "Like, a more-than-friends date?"
"Yes," Remus replied, looking down at the floor. "You can say no. I didn't expect you to—I'm not a dragon tamer—we can forget I ever asked."
A colony of Cornish pixies seemed to have taken residence in Tonks's belly, but it didn't feel unpleasant. Remus had said he was jealous; was this his way of telling her that he liked her? She wished she had her friends or mother nearby, to help her decipher the confusing language of men.
"I want to go on a date with you," Tonks replied softly, embarrassed by her own desires. "A not-just-friends date, a date date."
"You do?"
Tonks nodded. "I'd like that a lot."
A youthful grin appeared on Remus's face. Tonks felt like a verbally incontinent moron, but Remus's joy was infectious and she smiled in return.
"Is Saturday too soon?" he asked.
"That's when my dad's birthday is."
Remus brushed his hair back. "Friday?"
"Don't you have to work late?"
"Sunday—"
"That's when the kids' birthday is at the Potters'," Tonks reminded him, wishing they could skip the party and go on a date instead.
"Thursday?" The urgency had increased in Remus's tone.
"You don't have to work late then?"
"Day after the full moon," said Remus quickly. "I should be well enough, if I rest all morning."
Tonks had only seen Remus once after the full moon and he'd slept nearly all day. "Are you quite sure?" she asked.
Remus's face fell. "It's all right if it's too soon—"
"Soon is good," Tonks insisted. "I want to be sure you're all right. What time?"
"Six?"
The flapping-wings sensation hadn't left Tonks's body. She smiled, feeling awkward, having never been asked out like this before.
"I'm sorry, I don't know what else to say."
"You don't need to say anything," Remus said. He closed the space between them and offered her his hand. She put hers in his, unsure of what he was asking for. To her delight, he lifted her hand and pressed a soft kiss to the back of it. "Thank you for agreeing. I . . . I hope you enjoy it."
"I think I will."
After a few more moments of blushing and stammering, Remus offered to make tea and ask after the latest in Tonks's Auror training. It was enough of a distraction that Tonks could momentarily put the flying pixies at bay, but not enough that she stopped smiling until she went to sleep.
(And she noticed that Remus hadn't been able to fight back his smile either.)
Tuesday, 22 October 1991
A quartet of dancing skeletons welcomed Tonks as soon as she arrived at Diagon Alley. Their bones rattled as they pirouetted left and right, twirling for the amusement of arriving shoppers from the row of fireplaces.
"There you are!" Blythe grinned and met Tonks in front of Ollivander's. They hugged, and Blythe drew her face back in disgust. "Why do you smell like rotten fish?"
Tonks sniffed at her robes and frowned. "It's not fish, it's laverbread."
"Why does your bread smell like fish?"
"It's not bread," Tonks explained, frowning at the lingering fish smell on her robes. "It's this Welsh seaweed. I was just at my father-in-law's. He was trying to teach me how to make it and—"
"Either me or baby don't like it." Blythe's face turned a delicate shade of green and Tonks hastily cast a few charms on her hair and robes to get rid of the smell.
"Better?"
Blythe took a few light sniffs. "Only a little bit. We should go to the apothecary and have them rub rose petals on you."
"Good enough is good enough," Tonks complained. "We've only got so much time before the shops close! No time for the apothecary!"
Blythe rolled her eyes and followed Tonks into the shop they were likely to spend the evening in: Novella's Needles, a popular, Muggleborn-run clothing shop that sold the latest in Muggle fashions, but every piece was made with a witch or wizard in mind. Secret pockets for wands, extendable, weightless pockets for carrying heavy coins, and magically reinforced stitching made Novella's designs pricey, but highly desirable among younger witches and wizards.
It came as no surprise when the two young witches spent two hours browsing the racks and leaving with considerably lighter pockets. Blythe had spent a month's wages on maternity clothes that would magically expand throughout her whole pregnancy, and Tonks had purchased a few dresses that she was sure Remus would like, as they accentuated all the curves she wished she had more to speak of.
When they emerged from the shop, the shopping district was still abuzz with its seasonal decorations and festive patrons. Shimmering fairy lights criss-crossed above them, carved, glowing pumpkins in white, black, green, and orange were charmed to make faces, and the quartet of dancing skeletons was making its way down the Alley for more rattled laughter.
"Diagon Alley near Hallowe'en is the best, isn't it?" Blythe said dreamily.
Tonks shook her head. She replied, "It's Christmas and you know it."
"Christmas doesn't get you dancing skeletons."
"It can if you put Father Christmas hats on them," Tonks retorted.
"Who would do that?"
Tonks's smile brightened. "Remus would, if I asked him."
A mischievous smile grew on Blythe's face. "Let's go ask him!"
"He's working," said Tonks slowly, "and it's a busy time."
"So?" Blythe crossed her arms over her chest. "He can spare a few minutes for you."
As tempting as the idea sounded, not once had Tonks been to the Marauders' Mart and felt she felt like she belonged there.
"You wouldn't interrupt your husband if he was teaching."
"Not teaching, no," said Blythe, "but I've come to see him in his office."
"For what?"
Blythe smirked.
"Don't tell me it's for that —" Tonks shuddered, refusing to imagine any Hogwarts professor using their office for anything other than grading.
"I'm joking!" Blythe's laughter rung out. "No, it's nothing like that. I come to see him most Fridays with Sylvie. She gets out of school at the same time as me and we walk up to the castle to say hello."
Tonks softened; it was terribly domestic, or even more adult-like. It seemed like something Remus's friends' wives would do, visit them at their shop with their kids.
"Wow."
Blythe gave Tonks a questioning look. "Wow, what?"
"It's like . . . you're a whole family already."
"That's the point of this law, right?" Blythe shrugged. "Anyhow, don't you want to see him? You're going on a date!"
Tonks couldn't deny the pull she felt to see Remus. He was gone before she left for work and he had returned close to bedtime. If it wasn't for the full moon, she doubted they'd have a chance to go on a date before Hallowe'en.
"Okay," she agreed, "but I'm telling him that you insisted on it."
"Whatever you need to say, Tonks," Blythe chuckled, and the two made their way around the corner that took them to the Marauders' Mart.
Predictably, the shop was filled to the brim with customers. Dancing skeletons were literally flying off the shelves. The talking pumpkins that decorated the Alley were blathering over each other. Shape-shifting candles melted into puddles and rearranged themselves into whatever creature they were charmed to be.
"It's through here—" Tonks beckoned Blythe down a narrow alleyway that took them to the back entrance. She adjusted her robes, knocked lightly to announce her presence, and pulled the door open to find Remus and Lily inside.
"Oh, hello," Tonks said, unprepared to find Lily there.
"Tonks!" Remus called. He stood up immediately and came to join her. "Is everything all right?"
Tonks nodded. "I'm good, we're just here to say hi."
"Hello!" Blythe's cheerful tone cut through the unsettling tension in the workshop.
"Nice to see you, Blythe," said Remus. "How are—"
"And Blythe, this is Lily Potter," Tonks said, aware that they were under her green-eyed scrutiny. "She's married to James, one of the other shop owners."
Lily smiled and set down a blob that might've once been a candle, or would become a candle.
"Lily, this is Blythe Ander— Snape —"
"Snape?" Lily's auburn brow went up. "As in Severus Snape?"
"He's my husband," Blythe replied, with her head tilted slightly to the side. "Do you know him too?"
"We all went to school together," said Remus.
"I've known Severus for longer than our school years," said Lily. "We grew up in the same town."
"Cokeworth," Blythe confirmed, as Lily nodded. "His other mother-in-law lives there now."
"The grandmother of his daughter?"
"Sylvie's maica . She came when they moved. Doesn't speak much English but she's trying, and she never says no if I ask her to watch Sylvie for me." Blythe grinned at Tonks. "It's great when I want to see my best friend."
Lily looked between the two of them and said, "I did hear Severus was moving back to Britain—or Scotland, now that he's at Hogwarts—as he sent me a letter about it in July."
Blythe's eyes narrowed. "He sends you letters?"
"Once or twice a year," Lily said casually. "We're old friends."
"Has he told you I'm pregnant?" Blythe asked.
Lily shook her head. "He hadn't, but I knew about it through Remus."
"Because I knew about it," Tonks interjected, glancing at Remus for him to agree with her, and he obliged by nodding in her direction.
Blythe put her hand on her modest baby bump. "I'm due in April, and I'm hoping Tonks here gets pregnant soon so our kids can be best friends like us."
Lily snorted and exchanged a glance with Remus. "A Lupin, best friends with a Snape?"
"Imagine if the next baby Potter was involved," Remus said dryly.
"May as well add a Mulciber or Rosier to their group."
"What are they talking about?" Blythe whispered to Tonks.
"I'll tell you later," she murmured in return, and cleared her throat loudly. "Anyway, we were only here because Blythe wanted to know if you would put Father Christmas hats on your dancing skeletons for Christmas."
Remus huffed in amusement. "I had that idea a few years ago but we never got around to it. Now I see we'll have to do it."
Tonks beamed and set down her bags to hug him. When they parted, he peeked down at the floor and asked, "Did you do some shopping?"
"I got something to wear for Thursday." Tonks would've tried to make her smile sultrier, but when she'd tried practicing in a mirror, she looked constipated instead. "Would you like to see?"
Remus's tired eyes, wearier with the full moon less than a day away, still shone with the warmth Tonks had come to associate with him.
"I'd rather be surprised," he said softly. "I'm sure you'll look wonderful." Remus took her hand, and Tonks saw the way his eyes roamed over her body.
" AHEM ," Blythe coughed exaggeratedly. Tonks flushed, forgetting that she had an audience as she attempted to intrigue her husband, and turned away from Remus.
"Remus and I should stay longer," Lily said, with her eyes fixed on Remus, "but Blythe just told me it's already nine."
"I can stay—"
"No," Tonks protested. "Come home sooner, please. You need to rest."
Remus's eyes darted between Lily and Tonks. "I . . ."
"Tonks is right," Lily agreed. "You do need rest. I'll take over in the morning."
Remus exhaled and all his features relaxed. "Thank you, Lily, and Tonks, you can go home first, I'll be a few minutes."
Tonks was reluctant to leave Remus so soon. She reminded herself that she would have him to herself for a few days, and that it was better to walk with Blythe back to the Floos so neither of them went alone. They made their goodbyes and wandered back out into the main street, from which they could see shopkeepers beginning to close their shops for the night.
"Care to tell me what that was all about?" Blythe asked, once they rounded the corner.
"Are you sure you don't have something to tell me ?" Tonks retorted. "You looked like you were going to bite Lily's head off when she talked about Severus!"
"It's only fair that I know if my husband is writing letters to another woman."
Passing onlookers gave little gasps of shock at Blythe's statement, so Tonks pulled her aside to finish the conversation more discreetly.
"I've been at the Potters' every week for two months," Tonks said. "Lily may be a chore, but she's never said anything about Severus and she's way into James."
"You're just saying—"
"No, I mean it." Tonks took Blythe by the shoulders. "I don't know what she sees in him—maybe it's the hair—but Lily's really into James. Besides, remember all I told you about Remus, his friends, and Severus? They don't like each other. What Lily doesn't know is that you and I can do anything we want. If our kids want to be best friends, they can't stop them."
Blythe nodded and sniffled. She sat back on the edge of a windowsill and wiped away the tears in her eyes "These stupid hormones! They make me feel like I'm going mad!"
"I don't like it when Remus says anything about his past," Tonks said quietly, as she sat next to Blythe. "I get it."
Blythe leaned her head on Tonks's shoulder. "Did you hear what Lily said?"
"When?"
"When you were making a kissy face at Remus."
"No." Tonks frowned while her face got hot. "What did she say?"
"She said something about how you better not break Remus's heart."
"I swear, Blythe, one more—"
Blythe shook with barely contained laughter.
"Don't pay her any attention, Tonks," Blythe laughed. "She's blind if she can't see the way you look at him."
Tonks set her current irritation aside. "The way I look at him?"
"You're about as subtle as a mountain troll looking for sweets." Blythe shook her head. "It's obvious you're mad about him."
"It is?" Tonks burned with embarrassment.
"Obvious to me, but I've known you almost all my life," said Blythe. "That being said, you could break his heart if you wanted to."
"I'd never—"
"I'm not saying you want to." Blythe sat up and tucked her hair behind her ears. "I'm saying, he's obviously into you and if Lily said that, it means she knows it too."
"You think so?" Tonks whispered.
"I know so." Blythe exhaled and looked up at the fairy-lit alleyway. "I wish Severus was even an eighth as obvious. He's impossible to read."
"You like him too?"
Blythe sat silent for a moment. "I'm not sure. I don't want to put myself out there like that, you know? I wouldn't want to tell him I liked him and make it weird."
"I know."
"Still . . ." Blythe breathed out, looking out pensively at the decorations. "It's hard to tell if you like someone because you're forced to be with them."
The lights above them started to flicker and fade. Tonks and Blythe walked up to the Floos in companionable silence, as Tonks contemplated the situation she was in. It wasn't unlike Blythe's, she realized, stuck in a marriage where she might fall in love with her spouse, or it would end badly for both of them.
What was clear to Tonks, however, was that her feelings for Remus were only growing stronger. Lily might be afraid that she would break his heart, but now Tonks had to wonder if her heart could be broken too.
Thursday, 24 October 1991
Another transformation was approaching.
Remus lay in the shed in his garden, furry and clawed, awaiting moonset to return to his human state. The blanket underneath him reeked of wet dog. His side itched; he rubbed his body against the rough fabric. Scratching an itch with his claws nearly always led to injury the next day. He didn't need a gouge in his ribs while he finished up Hallowe'en production and sales. Nor did he need such an injury when he hoped to bed his wife again (if she let him, after their upcoming date).
The signs of moonset were settling into his bones. Everything hurt. His muscles protested as they contorted themselves from one shape to another. His bones rattled with sharp snaps and cracks, each motion leaving him feeling as if he'd been whacked by the Whomping Willow. His head pounded as even his brain shifted in size, his skull resizing itself for a human-shaped brain, as sharp teeth retracted into his jaws.
Then, as soon as it had started, it was over.
Remus gathered his clothes, dressed himself, and staggered out into the cold October air. He inhaled too much and entered the house with a violent cough and eyes burning from his attempt at enjoying the crisp morning breeze.
Stronger hands than Tonks's found his shoulders, and he was being forcibly led to one of the chairs in the kitchen.
"Wh-wh-who?" he wheezed.
"It's me, son," said Lyall, helping him down to the chair. As Remus coughed up a lungful of autumn, he breathed in other scents floating in the kitchen: sizzling bacon, warm cinnamon, and something vaguely floral.
"Remus!" Tonks called. "Are you okay?"
"F-fine," he sputtered lamely, while she set down a plate of food in front of him.
"Are you sure?" Tonks put her hand on his shoulder. "Do you need something?"
Remus peered up at her twinkling eyes, which were a calming shade of blue today. "I'm okay, just fine," he said, and then he saw the food in front of him. "What's all this?"
"Bacon, sausage, cockles and laverbread, and Welsh cakes," Tonks replied proudly. "Your dad brought the laverbread and taught me how to make the cakes."
Remus knew perfectly well what was on the plate. He was merely confused as to why he'd walked into his kitchen to find a feast and his father on an otherwise unremarkable Thursday morning.
"Tonks invited me," said Lyall, as if he could read Remus's mind. "She thought you might like a more traditional Welsh breakfast."
"Do you like it?" Tonks asked anxiously.
Remus took a bite of the bacon and nodded at her. She beamed, took off her apron, and brought a plate to Lyall but didn't sit down to join them.
"I already ate," she explained, and summoned her Auror robes from the bedroom. "I'm going in for a half-day. I'll be back after lunch!" Tonks's robes were askew and she yawned, but she seemed pleased with herself.
"I'll probably be sleeping," said Remus, already desiring the warmth of their bed.
"I know." Tonks kissed his cheek as a goodbye and gave a quick hug to Lyall. "Thank you for your help!" She grinned and dashed off to the Floo in a hurry.
As soon as the fire died down, Lyall chuckled. "Your mother would've loved her."
"I wish she could've met her." Remus pushed away the laverbread and cockles from his plate. "Did you tell her I don't actually like half of this?"
"Didn't have the heart to do it," Lyall replied, with a fond smile. "You can use it as fertilizer."
Remus bit into the Welsh cake instead, satisfied by the cinnamon sugar topping on it.
"I'm happy for you, son. She's everything I could've wanted for your wife." Lyall glanced at the pile of dishes left behind in the sink. He cast charms to get the dishes washing themselves and said, almost too casually, "She mentioned you were going on a date tonight."
Warmth filled Remus's sore body. "I'm taking her to Trattoria Biasio."
Lyall's eyes widened slightly. "Things are going well between you, then?"
"I'm trying." Remus swallowed a crispy bit of bacon. "Sirius and James convinced me to give it a go."
"Good men," Lyall said. He scooped the laverbread and cockles off Remus's plate for himself. "Tonks tells me your friend Lily's been giving her a hard time."
Remus groaned. Neither Tonks nor Lily had said as much to him directly, but it had become apparent that they were in an unspoken battle, though what they were fighting over and why the fight existed was beyond his imagination.
"I don't know how to get them to sort it out," he muttered. "I don't know why there's a problem."
"It's not something that should be forced." Lyall scrutinized Remus. "Have you spoken with either of them about it?"
Remus shook his head in response.
"You might want to get their sides of the story."
"Why me?" Remus sighed and rubbed at his tired eyes.
"Because Lily is your friend and Tonks is your wife."
"The row is between them though—"
Lyall put his hand up to stop Remus. It was just like his teenage days, when he wanted to see his friends too close to the full moon. "You've said before that Lily's like your sister, no?"
"Like the lads are my brothers," Remus replied.
"If she were your sister," Lyall counseled, "and your sister had an issue with your wife, it's not fair for you to leave it to them."
Remus's irritation was growing. "What would you have me do?"
"There are two sides to every story. At the end of the day, if you want peace, you'll have to find a way to support both of them."
"What if they're both right?"
Lyall patted Remus's arm. "When in doubt, go with your wife. You don't have to live with your sister."
There was something in the way Lyall spoke that made Remus think twice before retorting. It still didn't sound so simple to him; if he lost Lily as a friend, he might also be losing James, Sirius, and Peter, but if he lost his only chance at a loving marriage to an extraordinary witch, he would be just as regretful.
Remus ran a comb through his hair one last time. The grey streaks in his hair couldn't be helped, but it was freshly cut, neat, and clean. His shoes were shined, his trousers were pressed, and he'd even pulled out his single Muggle sport coat to wear over his shirt. He glanced at himself in the mirror; he felt overly dressed but the ensemble brought him a level of respect at Muggle establishments that he never enjoyed in the wizarding world.
When he entered the living room, he found Tonks by the front door, with her fingertips touching the blood-orange mums that were blooming on the windowsill. She wore a form-fitting tartan dress, black tights, and her favorite black boots to match. Her hair was his favorite shade of pink (though he had never said as much to her), and she had put something smoky on her eyelids.
"You look beautiful," he said, startling Tonks away from the flowers.
"Thank you." Her gaze traveled up from his shoes to his hair and she smiled. "Not looking so bad yourself."
Remus thought of conjuring a bouquet of flowers for her, but he'd need to find a vase and water, and he didn't want to waste another moment before taking his wife on a date.
"Shall we?" he said.
Tonks took his hand. He led her out of the house and to the garden, where he turned on his heel and Apparated them to a familiar spot not far from Cardiff.
"Where are we?"
"Caerphilly," Remus replied. "My mam's parents lived here." He squeezed Tonks's hand lightly and walked out with her to the main road, which had evening shoppers walking to and fro.
They turned around a bend and found the Italian restaurant Remus had chosen. It had been there for as long as he could remember, a place for celebrations and bigger moments in the Lupin-Howell families, which had become rarer over time. When they entered, Remus's eyes adjusted to the dim light, and he stepped forward with Tonks.
"Good evening, sir," greeted the Muggle hostess. "A table for two for you and your . . ." The hostess's brow came together when she found Tonks.
"Wife," Remus supplied. It didn't go unnoticed, the way the hostess's brow went up, but she dutifully brought him and Tonks to a cozy table for two.
"This is really nice," Tonks whispered, from behind her menu.
"My grandparents came here for their anniversaries," Remus said. "My parents did too, when they could. One of my earliest memories was being here with all of them. It was before . . ." He cleared his throat. "I was healthy. Dad worried about accidental magic. He was right to be—I made a meatball hover in the air, but Dad caught it in time."
Tonks grinned. "That's adorable. Your grandparents knew about magic?"
"They had no idea," Remus said, with a snort. "They thought Dad had lost his mind when he stuffed a meatball into his mouth with his bare hands."
The waiter came by to take orders—Remus splurged on an entree—and Tonks grew quiet, with a pensive look on her face.
"Is this where you always go for first dates?" she asked.
Remus took a sip of his wine and replied, "I've never been here on a date. It's, er—" He wanted to say it was out of his budget. It was once true, and might still have been, but Tonks was worth every pound. "—this is something I wanted to share with someone I was closer to."
In the dim candlelight, Tonks's face glowed as pink as her hair. "Thank you for sharing it with me," she said softly.
When their first course had arrived, Tonks looked down and made a sound halfway between a giggle and a cough.
"Is something wrong?" asked Remus, worried.
Tonks put her hands in her lap. "I've never been on a real date. I went on some at Hogsmeade, but not like, where we go somewhere nice like this. I got to go to Madam Puddifoot's, but that was because this other guy lost a bet."
"Oh, erm—"
"I don't really know what I'm doing," Tonks continued, "or that's how it feels. I don't even know what to talk about."
Remus felt a surge of affection for her. As nervous as he was, she might have been more nervous, having never been treated the way she should have been by the foolish young men she went to school with.
"Talk about whatever you like," Remus replied. "Family, friends, work, anything. We're having a conversation over dinner. That's all."
Tonks relaxed her shoulders and nibbled on a piece of bread. "Can I ask you more about your family?"
"Of course." Remus smiled at her encouragingly as she asked after his parents and grandparents, and how they'd met. From that point, the conversation flowed as he'd hoped.
Remus told her about the way his grandparents liked to slip him sweets whenever his parents weren't looking, even if he felt ill from the full moon. He told her about their confusion when he was mysteriously ill once a month, but like his parents, they always had love to give him.
Tonks spoke of her own family, her beloved grandmother who made the best chocolate biscuits. She spoke of the friends she'd made at school and the adventures they got up to as they grew older. She regaled him with her many attempts to impersonate Hogwarts teachers, with her only success in fooling Mr Filch into thinking a group of Gryffindors had blown up half the toilets in their dormitory.
It was all too soon when their plates had been cleared, their wine glasses were empty, and the restaurant staff were making not-so-discreet comments that they were closing for the night. Remus dropped an eye-watering hundred pounds on the dinner, but every bit of it had been worth it. He'd never had such a pleasant first date, or a more beautiful woman to share it with.
When Remus and Tonks emerged from the restaurant, the moonless sky looked down on them. There were no open shops at that time of night, and by all accounts, their date was almost over.
"Time to go home?"
Remus nodded. "We'll go back to where we came from."
They retraced their steps and Apparated in the front garden of their home. Remus had enjoyed himself thoroughly. He felt as if he'd been on many dates with Tonks already, and had she been a Muggle, he might've been lucky enough to be invited into her bed.
Yet as he looked at the home they shared, he found himself wondering if she felt the same. They were still holding hands as they walked up the stairs to the front door, and before Remus had a chance to say anything, Tonks spoke.
"What happens now?"