Co-written with miss mika namariya. We own nothing!
The wedding planning was in progress. The tadpoles were getting bigger by the day; some had even started growing their leg-nubs. All in all, things were going well. So naturally, Kuon was a nervous wreck.
The reason was simple: Any time a past relationship had gone this well, the girl had met her True Love and subsequently broken up with him. Now, a logical mind would argue that since Kyoko had already met her True Love - namely, him - this should not be a concern. Kuon, while usually fairly clever, was not logical when it came to Kyoko. Hence, the longer things stayed happy and peaceful, the more panicked Kuon became. Any time Kyoko met someone new and eligible, he feared that this would be the end. That he would have to watch her fall in love with someone else.
It did not take long for Kyoko to notice. So one afternoon, after meeting some lovely ladies who were new to court and seemed to be genuinely interested in the well-being of the tadpoles, Kyoko tugged Kuon into the secret tunnels. "We need to talk."
This is it, Kuon thought in despair. She's found someone else. This is where it ends. I will live in the tunnels she created so that I may pretend to be close to her for the rest of my days.
"Why have you been so jumpy lately?" She put her hands on her hips. "Do you not feel safe? Because I assure you that our engagement has not compromised my dedication to your safety."
"No, that's not it." His heart soared. Maybe she's not dumping me.
"Then what's wrong?" She softened, and took one of his hands in both of hers. "You can talk to me, you know. We're in this together, now."
Fuck it. "I just - everyone I've ever been set up with before has left me because they found their True Love."
She stared at him blankly in the dim light. "But… you're my True Love."
"I know, I know, it's just…" He ran his free hand through his hair, frazzled. "What if you have another True Love? A Truer True Love?"
"I'm pretty sure that if those existed, I would have learned about them at the Academy."
"We should - we should get married immediately. Tomorrow." His Hizuri was showing. "And outlaw divorce."
Kyoko rolled her eyes and tugged him down so she could kiss his cheek. "Trust me, you really don't need to do that."
Kuon was rendered an absolute orange cat of a man by her affections: no thoughts, head empty, and heart full. And like any good orange cat, he now had no worries. Just a strange desire to push things off of shelves.
LINE BREAK
Queen Julienna, while not a Hizuri by blood, nevertheless shared some of her husband's more obsessive tendencies. In the Queen's case, this manifested as four hundred different designs for Kyoko's wedding dress and lengthy discussions about lace (Kyoko was thrilled to learn that yes they could make any shape in lace and yes the queen thought a faerie motif would be beautiful and set about sketching even more designs).
Kyoko had worn a dress perhaps a handful of times in her life. Her usual tunic & leggings combination was practical, comfortable, great for hiding weapons, and incredibly aesthetically boring. Kyoko, at the heart of things, was a girly girl with a deep love for the dramatic silhouettes, intricate patterns, and draping fabrics of court dresses. She had never thought that she would be able to wear one herself. Part of her still didn't believe it - and part of her was very conflicted about it.
On one hand, she absolutely loved the gorgeous, intricate designs the Queen had created. They were everything she had never allowed herself to dream about. But on the other hand, they were very impractical. She knew that they were difficult to move in the way she liked, and that many of them did not come with sufficient weapon storage. Even if she was marrying the prince, she was still his guard. She needed to be able to keep him safe. A royal wedding would be a fantastic opportunity for anyone who was trying to make a statement to attack the royal family.
Kyoko sighed wistfully over the pages and pages of dress designs.
"What's wrong, sweetie?" Julie asked, coming to sit down beside her. "Scone?"
Kyoko took one with thanks, and nibbled on it as she gathered her words. "They're too beautiful."
"Thank you." The Queen looked at her for a moment. "What's really wrong?"
"I just - I don't know if I'll be able to perform my duties adequately if I'm wearing this type of dress." She lovingly traced one of the ballgowns with her scone-free hand.
She gave her a gentle, amused smile. "Well, honey, he'll help you take it off when the time comes. You don't tend to keep it on very long."
"What?"
"What?" Her brow furrowed. "Were… were you not talking about your marital duties?"
Kyoko turned a particularly violent shade of red. "No! I was talking about my duties as a guard!"
The furrow grew deeper. "Honey… you're going to be a princess, not a guard."
"But -"
"Besides, there will be plenty of other guards at the wedding. You won't have to worry about any of that on your big day." She reached over and tucked some of Kyoko's hair behind her ear. "It's your wedding, after all! It only happens once."
"So I… I can wear a pretty dress?" She didn't want to get her hopes up, but there were already sparkles floating around her. Too bad Sir Hoppington was watching the tadpoles; he loved to snack on them. One member of Kyoko's team tucked a few away to give to the frogs later.
Julie's brow smoothed, and she laughed. "Of course! What else would we be doing here?"
Kyoko leaned over to pore over the designs. "I'd still feel more comfortable if I could at least have some daggers on me. Maybe in a hidden pocket?"
Julie, intrigued by the design challenge, leaned in as well.
LINE BREAK
The court was, as ever, abuzz with gossip. What court isn't? All sorts of people came to the capital city to visit the palace, bringing news from all corners of the kingdom and beyond. And if there ever was a slow week, Duke Takarada could generally be counted on to do something eccentric or outlandish, so there was always that to talk about.
Alas for the Duke, he had been pushed out of the spotlight. As theatrical as he was, Lory simply could not compete with an upcoming royal wedding. Especially when so little was known about the prince's bride-to-be.
"I heard that Duke Takarada took her in as a child! My lady-in-waiting says he found her wandering the streets when she was no more than ten!" one countess said.
"No, I believe you're misinformed, Lady Akane— for I heard that Duke Takarada found her as a baby! She was less than one year old, and she was wearing a golden circlet set with emeralds exactly the same color as the Prince's eyes and that's how he knew that she'd be the future princess one d—"
"Preposterous!" A duchess tutted. "Who abandons a baby with a tiara? I have it on very good authority that the Prince and Princess-to-be have known each other for much longer than we may think! Why apparently they met as children, quite young— he was ten and she was only six!— and they have been secretly engaged for over a decade!"
Anyone who had been at court for the last year and watched the Prince pathetically follow his bodyguard around like a wet puppy could tell that there certainly had been no secret engagement. But anyone with sense would also never correct a duchess, especially one as fierce as Lady Shino.
"What do you make of those frogs?" asked a young baroness. "I've seen the Prince carry one nearly everywhere. They're inseparable! And the bodyguard is nowhere to be found— oh! Do you think the future princess is a shapeshifter?!"
"Did you hear that the prince had been asking about baby showers?" a countess added, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes, for the frogs -"
"I think that was a distraction. There's no other way about it; she must be expecting."
"I wonder about that," the duchess said, after a moment. "I spoke to her about it the other day, you know, and she just stared me down. I had just been expressing my concern about the way she flings herself from heights - very unladylike to begin with, but so much more concerning if she has a little one on the way." She shook her head. "She looked at me so strangely - you know that look servants give when they want to say something, but know their place?"
The other ladies nodded.
"It was that exactly. None of it is exactly princessly behavior, is it?"
"It does make one worry! Thank heavens it's True Love," a lady added.
"I think we ought to be grateful," the countess said. "I told you about my great-uncle, haven't I? Met his True Love after a shipwreck, and the girl didn't speak for a whole week! Not only that, she didn't even know how to use a fork! Apparently she had amnesia or something…"
The others murmured their agreement, then moved on to discussing other matters. "Did you hear about Lady Hana?"
LINE BREAK
Kyoko was starting to suspect that most of the well-wishers were not, in fact, talking about the tadpoles. Namely because the only people who had actually showed up to the T.O.A.D.S. meeting were herself, Kuon, and the scholars.
Not that she could have wished for a better meeting - the scholars had fawned over the Hoppington family. One of them had also been particularly interested in the bioluminescent moss she had procured for them, and had been baffled to learn that it grew in the castle's tunnels. She made sure to send that scholar back with a sample of the moss for study. The scholars had also (very carefully) gathered some of Sir Hoppington's poison for study. Kyoko sent them home with a vial of the antidote she had crafted for it. Granted, the poison was so fast-acting that they would be unlikely to be able to drink it in time, but it was nice for their peace of mind.
Regardless, not a single noble well-wisher had even bothered to come to the meeting. This was incredibly suspicious to Kyoko. Hence, why she had begun suspecting that the vast majority of the well-wishers who had been accosting her in the halls were not talking about the tadpoles. To add to that, some of them even had the gall to look disgusted when she showed them sketches of the tadpoles with their leg-nubs!
When she huffily explained all of this to Kanae, the Archive actually looked up from her book. "Well, duh."
"What do you mean, duh?" she asked as Yogurt the library cat hopped into her lap. She gave him scritchies.
Kanae rolled her eyes. "They're nobility. They're trying to get in good with the crown."
"But I'm a guard," she said blankly.
"You're marrying the crown prince. You'll be queen someday." She stared at her friend then, very seriously. "You do realize that, right?"
"Of course I do!" she said, like a liar. "Well, mostly," she added, when Kanae gave her a look. "Okay, it doesn't feel real. At all."
Kanae sighed and closed her book. "Come on. We're going for a walk."
Kyoko's eyes lit up. A stroll, arm-in-arm with her best friend! Just like she'd always dreamed!
"Stop giving me that look. It's creepy."
Yogurt meowed and leapt off of Kyoko's lap to chase one of her sparkles.
"But Moko!" she said rapturously, hopping up and scurrying around the table to grab her arm. "We never go on walks! Just imagine, us strolling through the gardens, fairies dancing around us as they come to place flowers in your hair -"
"Mo, stop it. You're being loud." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "I meant going for a walk." After all, karaoke booths hadn't been invented yet.
"Oh." She calmed considerably. "Okay." She led the way to one of the secret tunnel entrances.
Kanae then linked arms with Kyoko of her own accord. "Don't get all giddy. My night vision just isn't as good as yours, and knowing you, there are at least sixteen ways to die down here."
"I would never let anything hurt you, Moko! And just so you know, there are twenty-seven."
"Of course." They walked in silence for a little while, the bioluminescent moss barely providing enough light by which to navigate. Eventually, Kanae broke the silence. "So. How are you… feeling about all this?" Ugh, emotions. So messy. This is why Kyoko was her only friend. She was enough trouble as it was.
"I'm feeling… a lot," Kyoko murmured. "It's good, mostly, but weird. Duck."
Kanae obeyed without question, therefore avoiding smacking her head on a stalactite. "Weird how?"
Kyoko was quiet for some time, and Kanae let her be. She knew Kyoko well enough by now to know when to let the silence urge her to speak. At length, she said, "It doesn't feel like it's happening to me. Or at least that it shouldn't be."
"Why?"
"Because it's… me?" She made some vague gestures with her hands that Kanae could only sort of see in the dark. "I'm not exactly princess material."
Kanae let out a long-suffering sigh. "Kyoko, you literally can talk to animals."
"That's a changeling thing, though -"
"And it's True Freaking Love." She rolled her eyes, knowing full well that Kyoko couldn't see in the dark. "Not even gossipy old biddies can argue with that. I mean, they could, but they'd lose."
"Yeah, but -"
"Plus," she steamrolled on, "it's not like you weren't trained for it at the Academy."
"I was?"
"Mo! What do you think all those political, ethical, financial, and statecraft classes were for?"
"...To help us guard people in power?"
"You two really are a perfect pair," Kanae grumbled. "A perfect pair of dumbasses."
"I got the same marks as you, Moko."
"Having book smarts and being a dumbass are not mutually exclusive." There was a pause, and then she said, "Stop pouting at me."
"You're so mean to me," she fake-lamented.
"Yeah, yeah. But you're my dumbass, so it makes up for it."
Kyoko giggled, then leaned against her friend as they walked. "Thanks, Moko."
"Don't mention it." They stepped out into a hallway in the main castle and unlinked arms. "Seriously, don't mention it."
She grinned and blew her a kiss (that Kanae pretended to dodge) before clambering up a pillar to patrol, feeling ten times lighter than before.
LINE BREAK
Kuon sighed. He felt like with all the wedding planning, he had barely seen Kyoko lately. If she wasn't guarding him (and what blessed hours those were), then she was either working on recipes in the kitchen or being fitted for her dress by his mom. It didn't stop there, either. They had gotten most of the invitations sent (save for the witches from the forest, whom they didn't know how to contact), but now there was the literal rest of the wedding. Decorations, seating arrangements (boy was that a headache), outfits, and the general stress that comes with planning a royal event. He was doing his best to be as involved as possible - he didn't want it all falling on Kyoko, nor did he want the duke and his parents to steamroll everything and make it absurd - but he also had princely duties to attend to.
With the upcoming wedding, there were all sorts of foreign dignitaries with whom he had to correspond. He didn't even want to think about all the socializing he would have to do when they actually arrived. He also needed to handle his usual policy meetings, and everything else that came with being the crown prince. He usually enjoyed his work (to a point), but right now he hated it. He hated every single bit of it for keeping him away from Kyoko. He barely even saw her at lunch anymore, since there were so many people starting to come to court for the Season with whom he had to play nice. At least he didn't have to worry about match-making schemes anymore. One of the benefits of True Love (aside from the obvious) was that no one really tried to break it up. After all, fairy tales warned about what happened to those who did.
There was something very satisfying about having all the meddling aunts who, just last Season had been accosting him about their nieces, wish him well through gritted teeth. It was hilarious watching them try to play nice with Kyoko, who had cottoned on to their game and was regarding all of them with suspicion. Oh, she smiled and clasped hands and accepted their wishes warmly. But he knew better. He knew her better.
Kyoko was, in fact, sizing up each and every well-wisher for their level of threat - and their level of utility to the throne. She was going to be a terrifying queen someday. Kuon loved her even more for it.
LINE BREAK
Kyoko was, to put it mildly, sick of people accosting her in the hallways. She was tired of being constantly on edge and on guard (so to speak), even when not on duty.
So she had taken to avoiding the hallways entirely, instead traveling solely by secret passages. She'd even added a few extra to help her avoid people.
This, of course, only fanned the flames on the rumors about her pregnancy. Since the court had not seen her recently, they assumed that she had gone into hiding, and would emerge for the wedding in a bump-disguising dress.
They were wrong, of course, but the truth never stops a good rumor.
LINE BREAK
Maria, having accepted that Kyoko would indeed be marrying Kuon, had decided that the girl was officially her older sister. And since they were family, that made Kyoko's business her business. And that meant that busybodies sticking their noses in Kyoko's business met the business end of her giant spider, Theobold.
Grandfather had tried and failed to stop her bringing him to court with her this Season. She was extra glad now that she had. Anyone who was caught gossiping about Kyoko was formally invited to tea with Maria… and Theobold. She would often greet her guests at the door riding on his back.
It worked beautifully.
LINE BREAK
"Where have you been?" Kuon asked the air one day, when he was apparently alone (save for the froggos, who were ribbiting gently to each other) in his living space.
"The tunnels, mostly," Kyoko replied, materializing from somewhere Kuon didn't bother trying to discern. She plopped down next to him on the couch with a huff. "How do you deal with them?"
"Them?" He realized with glee that he could tug her into his lap, so he did. To his joy, she allowed this.
She gestured grumpily at the rest of the castle. "Them. The court. All those fake, sparkly smiles."
"Generally, with a faker, sparklier smile." He demonstrated. "Like this one."
"I hate it," she said flatly, smushing his cheeks to make him stop.
He laughed.
"That one's better." She mirrored it with one of her own, and then pressed a kiss against his jaw. "You'll have to teach me the scary one, though. I'm too used to doing the dutiful servant expression instead. I heard them talking about it."
"Could always kick 'em out of court," he offered, a little drunk off her affection.
"If we kicked everyone fake out of court, there wouldn't be a court."
"That's true." He wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled the top of her head. "Y'know, I'm surprised the duke didn't teach you fake smiles at that so-called academy of his."
She thought for a moment. "He might have offered a course that covered it. I didn't take every class he offered, after all."
"Yeah? What are some others you skipped?"
"Umm…" She leaned her head against him, thinking. "I didn't take any of the animal husbandry classes. Or painting; that one was in the same time slot as my needlework class. Though I kind of wish I'd had time to take it."
"We have a lot of tutors at the palace who I'm sure would be glad to teach you." Even if they said my watercolors looked more like mud puddles.
"I wonder if they'd teach me how to paint portraits. I'd love to have a family portrait of the Hoppingtons."
And suddenly, Kuon knew what to get Kyoko as a wedding present.
LINE BREAK
"Great news!" Kijima exclaimed, bursting through Kuon's doors (and getting tackled and pinned by Kyoko for doing so). "Lemme up, you'll like this, too."
She glanced at Kuon, who shrugged and gestured for her to let him up. "What is it?" she asked, helping him to his feet.
"Behold!" He held up a small, almost palm-sized suit.
"What is that?" Kuon asked, squinting at it.
Kyoko, however, squealed and clapped her hands together. "It's perfect! Oh, I wish I'd thought of it!" She darted over to the tank and lifted Sir Hoppington out.
"Roob?"
"Look, Sir Hoppington! Sir Kijima got you a suit!"
"I figured that I should get him one. We'll match - only makes sense since I'm escorting him." He handed over the suit, which Kyoko helped Sir Hoppington wriggle into.
"Roob." He sat in her palm, looking very distinguished indeed.
And Kuon knew what Sir Hoppington would wear in his portrait.
LINE BREAK
"Kuon," Kyoko said, popping out of a tapestry and scaring him half-to-death, "I just realized a major problem."
Oh god, is she dumping me? "What's wrong?"
"I don't have a dowry," she admitted, unable to look him in the eyes.
"...yeah? And?"
"Don't I - don't I need a dowry to get married?" She met his gaze then, worry clear on her face.
"No?"
"But the law -"
"Got overturned when Mom and Dad got married." He held out his arms to her, and she stepped into them willingly. "Besides, it wouldn't have applied to us anyway - True Loves were always exempt."
"Oh." She visibly relaxed. "Well, now I feel silly."
"Eh, blame the duke for having outdated materials." Besides, it's kind of reassuring that you were worried about it.
"Ribbit," commented Sir Hoppington from his spot on the desk. Rather, the desk's sunken mini-tank. He may be a father now, but he still had responsibilities to the crown. Namely, being a sounding board for the prince's correspondences. "Rooob."
Kyoko giggled. "Somehow, I don't think that the crown would want a dowry of moths."
"Yeah, no, we're good," Kuon said with a grin.
Sir Hoppington blinked wetly at them. Oh well. More for his family, then.
LINE BREAK
Kyoko bounced out of the queen's chambers, positively beaming, and ran smack into Kuon, who had been lurking there. "Oh! Hi!"
"Hi," he replied, leaning down to steal a kiss. "I take it you like how the dress is coming along?"
"It's done!" Her team was packing away sparkles for the frogs to snack on later. Apparently, sparkles were very nutritious and good for tadpole development.
Caught up in her excitement, he took her hand and gave her a spin. "Yeah? Do you like it?"
"It's wonderful! It has everything I need. The queen is such a talented designer!" She did another twirl of her own accord. Sparkles flew everywhere. Her team was working overtime.
"What does it look like?" he asked.
She just smiled and shook her head.
"C'mon, give me a hint."
"It's a dress." She stretched up and tapped his lips with her finger. "That's all you get to know 'til the big day!"
The big day. Even thinking about it brought a dopey smile to his face. He could hardly wait.