Yesss, a longer chapter.
This is the last of the D-rank arc. Next is training (with background d-ranks but they're not major for plot-sake).
-;-
Summer in New York smelt different.
Sometimes he could smell it; the odours of old motor oil sweltering off the road, dried piss and shit from the homeless on the streets. Fried food steaming out of restaurant air ventilators and cooked meat from parked hotdog stands. And the sweat. God the sweat. Like someone dropping a bottle of saline solution in the pan and steaming it. Stirred in with cheap cologne and ornamental perfume.
Godfrey inhaled it like marijuana.
To Sasuke it meant the heat of scorched earth beneath him, the steaming of Yakitori his uncles and aunts cooked. Juices wafting into the air and coated in an array of sauces from sweet to sour. It meant the cool, salty freshwater fish caught from the local river and grilled eel Itachi was just learning to perfect.
Godfrey heard engine backfire and piling querulous criminals. Sasuke heard cicadas and his mother laughing.
Sasuke sat in the backyard of his client's house, listening to the membranes of cicadas buckling inwards and smelling the sweat on his upper lip.
Lurking under the shade of a tree, he stares up through sunlit leaves recalling a time on break where he and Quin had settled down in Central Park munching on warm hotdogs and bitching about the heat.
"Christ it's hot."
"No shit, Godfrey."
He laughs.
-;-
Sasuke is making everybody tea - from a packet this time, thank you sensei - when the cup he's holding cracks.
Rim to base, a line splinters open and dribbles boiling water everywhere.
Death omens being a routine hazard and a special branded affliction, Sasuke doesn't pause to spill the water in the sink and lob the cup in the trash. Only when it shatters loudly on impact does he stop to think about how much it could have cost.
The only thing more miserable than omens and patrolman wages are fines for property damage.
Silently, he pokes a hand in the bin to dig the evidence under some old rubbish.
Grabbing another mug from the overhead cabinet, Kakashi come in through the kitchen door leading Mai's elderly father.
"…and this here is the third member of our squad, Genin Uchiha Sasuke."
Barely onto sixty, the man eyes Sasuke up and down and tries to smother a sickly cough. "O-Oh yes, the one Naruto-san told me Aki-chan can't stand."
Sasuke resents that.
Filling the new mug with tea he hands it to Kakashi. Smile sharp.
"Enjoy, I put some poison in it."
At the old man's horrified stutter, Kakashi placates. "Don't worry, sir," he stares Sasuke down, "He was just joking."
"You shinobi have a special kind of, hem, humour."
Can't argue that.
-;-
Kakashi takes them to a soup restaurant at lunch, to bequeath a small lecture on healthy diets. Directly in the booth behind the man, a dead woman slurps ramen. Sasuke risks a glance at the lady. Mainly due to being a shut in, it was rare to come across ghosts who forgot they were dead. Stuck in a loop of ignorant desire
[He doesn't want to particularly care on the technicalities about ghost ramen.]
"How'm I still alive?" Naruto audibly wonders.
"Pure stubbornness, I'm sure," Sakura says.
The waitress comes and Kakashi orders for them. Besides Sakura, Naruto shrinks into the seat trying not to be seen. Sakura whispers a question. Sasuke doesn't listen in, but when he catches the way her face turns to steel he eyes the bathroom seductively.
"Make the last one a large please."
"Will that be all, sir?"
"Uh huh."
"Sensei," Sakura directs her gaze to Kakashi when the waitress steps away. Naruto makes shushing gestures she slaps off. "Why do the village treat Naruto like some pesticide?"
Sasuke grabs his glass of water and takes a long sip.
"Sakura-chan."
Kakashi taps his chin. "Fun question."
"Ooh," she drawls, "must be a fun answer."
"Depends on Naruto-chan," the man eye smiles at the wilting boy. "Your secret."
Blue eyes pop in shock. "You know?"
"Gosh, it's my responsibility to oversee your welfare and tutelage on becoming the best shinobi you could possibly be." That is horrific. "If I didn't I'd be a wacko."
You're one to talk.
For some reason this leaves Naruto in a silent state of teary-eyed distress.
Uncomfortable with the level of emo angst, Sasuke excuses himself to the bathroom. Kakashi eyes Sakura.
She grabs his elbow and Sasuke finds himself being unhappily ganged upon. Even Naruto was sending him the SOS eyes.
"If you go I'll suspend you from bars."
"Fuck all of you." He sits.
"You're a hoot and a toot today, Sasuke-chan," Kakashi says. "Can't miss out on team heart-to-hearts. It's important stuff, truly. Now, about Naruto's dirty little secret," Naruto does his best to voice his objections but Kakashi continues on. "Though I think it's for the best if we have this conversation in a more private setting and with our orange teammates consent."
"I do not consent."
"Then that's that."
Sakura goes solemn. "Is the secret that bad?"
"Oh it's the absolute worst," Kakashi chirps. "And when Naruto does tell you and you run away screaming, I'll personally fuck over your career and send you packing to the Genin Corps with no promotion in sight."
Feeling cheeky, Sasuke raises his water glass in a "Hear, hear!"
"Don't take that as incentive. Do not take that as incentive."
-;-
Even with Naruto's impending Truth laid to momentary rest, the rest of lunch is spent with stiff tension in the air.
Sasuke's given the big bowl of soup.
Kakashi really is giving him grief about his eating habits.
-;-
More demeaning D-ranks are handed to them and time passes. The sun is just about to set when Kakashi drags them all, limbs beat and energy sapped, to a small grocery shop.
He hands Sakura a list and pairs her with Sasuke while Naruto is kidnapped. Sasuke observes them over an assortment of potatoes before disappearing down an isle of dried fruit.
"You think they're having a 'heart-to-heart'?" Sakura asks. Leading Sasuke through the ambiguous store he never knew even existed. She drifts off and returns, dropping a bag of rice in the basket Sasuke's holding. He almost buckles under the weight.
"Naruto looked like he was about to leg it, so definitely."
"I just realised something."
"What's up?"
"I'm doing all the work here, this is your food. You're mooching. Why am I allowing this?"
Sasuke conjures a delightful smile, "You love me?"
Visibly tired, she shoves the grocery list in his hand and walks off shouting a heartfelt, "Screw you," over her shoulder.
-;-
"Well isn't this a pleasant surprise?" Kenji immediately inspects his grocery haul. Unable to physically move the plastic bags, he shoves his face into them. "Oho~"
"Don't bleed too much in excitement," Sasuke warns. Stripping off bits of clothing as he makes it into the bathroom's shower.
In seconds cold water braces his skin and he sighs. Non-existent muscles tender.
-;-
There's a crow sitting on his kitchen windowsill when Sasuke wakes up from his impromptu Nano-sleep in the shower. Verging onto hypothermia, he spends at least twenty minutes wrestling into warm clothing when he startles at the, dare he say, haughty squawk he gets on his way out to the chemist.
Dead eyes meet pitch black, and the crow flaps off.
Omens. Whacky stuff.
One glimpse at fruit and vegetables on the kitchen table, show early signs of escalated deterioration. Honestly, what did he expect?
He throws them out. Pausing at spotting a hidden note stuck inside one of the two bags. Reaching inside, he pulls it out and opens the tiny piece of paper.
Scribbled onto it read:
'In case you ever need to talk:
Home number: ******
Hatake Kakashi'
Sasuke tries to feel appreciative by the man's efforts like a good little boy, but all he ends up with is a sore awkwardness sitting in his chest - mixed with a heavy amount of building resentment.
It was like somebody had just stepped onto his crime scene without signing in their name and wearing a bunny suit. Or some random civilian trying to speak a kid down from the edge of a building while professionals are around.
Kakashi was trying to contain a potential threat.
Cute.
"That's sweet of him," Kenji says over his shoulder.
"Jesus Christ!" Sasuke screams, throwing himself away from Kenji's ectoplasmic blood. Appears he's gotten more comfortable with Kenji's spiritual aura than he would like.
"You should phone him and tell him about trying to freeze yourself to death in the shower."
"In my defence that was unexpected," he says and scrunches up the bit of paper. Tossing it into the bin and thinking nothing of it. "Back in a bit."
"It's still dark out," Kenji hooks a phantom finger to the kitchen window. Beyond it a half-moon hung in the sky. "And you look like shit."
"Feel it too," Sasuke covers a sneeze with his jumper's sleeve. "Gonna get some cold medication."
He scoffs at Kenji's sarcastic 'yeah, good luck with that' look.
Some odd years ago he had managed to negotiate some flu medication from the civilian district and overdose on it. Distressed about loosing the last Uchiha, the Hokage sent out warning letters to every chemist prohibiting them from selling pharmaceutical drugs to Sasuke - except from strenuous circumstances, of course.
For instance almost freezing to death and getting a nauseating cold, Sasuke can call that strenuous.
In his opinion this was a perfect set-up.
Exhaustion and anticipation ripples through him.
"In my experience," Sasuke coughs, "people are more sympathetic to help when a kid looks sick."
And Kenji can shut up, because he's proven right twenty minutes later.
Paper bag with a bottle of pills, Sasuke navigates his path back home. Even at night Konoha was warm, and it sickens him when a hot breath of air sweeps into his jumpers' collar. He shivers in the quiet, sleeping civilian neighbourhood. Only sound being rustles of trees, minuscule taps on rooftops from passing shinobi and his laboured breathing. Another feverish shiver has him pausing against a lamppost. Damp forehead pressed against the cool metal.
Son of a gun this dying business was one tedious bitch.
He doesn't remember it happening, but he ends up sitting on the ground and staring up at the brightening sky. It's probably four or five in the morning and Team Seven will be meeting in an hour's time without him. It's a peaceful thought.
Half moon staring back, Sasuke begins to imagine it. Falling into that dark, endless sleep under stars. No more grief. No more pain. No more anything.
Calmly, almost practiced, he takes out the pills and opens the bottle. It's child proofed and takes longer than it could have if he wasn't shivering like an addict waiting for another hit.
A handful spills out and he shoves the white pea-like pills into his mouth without thought.
And chokes them back up when a bowl-cut man in green spandex and orange ankle sweats drops in front of him Power Ranger style.
Hell-o?
"You fool!" he shouts, slamming his palm against his back as he coughs up more.. "I commend your enthusiasm for desiring a quick recovery but two pills are standard dosages! Your sparkling youth will not flourish with this outrageous amount!"
He spends a couple more seconds spluttering before staring up at the man squatted at his level. Face severe under that ridiculous bowl-cut.
A distant ping goes off in his mind and he doesn't bother suppressing the urge to slam his skull against the lamppost. This was Gai.
Kakashi's manic pal.
He laughs – all wobbly and crooked.
"You shouldn't do that to yourself," Gai presses a hand against Sasuke's head to deter him. Unbelievable.
Christ, he thinks. I can't catch a break.
Why can't I catch a break?
What a miserable little bitch he is.
If Gai is disturbed, he doesn't show it. Smile bright and reflective under street light, he hollers, "You are my Eternal Rival's student! Uchiha Sasuke, if I am not mistaken."
"You are mistaken."
Catching his breath from laughter he heaves himself up. Gai moves to help but stops at his furious glower. If Kakashi got wind of this he'd cut off his alcohol supply.
"Don't worry about me, sir," He gives an unimpressive thumbs up. "I'm all good."
Gai has those perky 'no bullshit' eyes. The kind his psychologist got whenever he fibbed about his PTSD.
For real?
-;-
Rin's back at Kakashi's apartment. She sings and giggles and coos at him. Visiting Kushina must have put her in better spirits, the entire place resembles a massacre.
Sasuke is reminded of one particularly gruesome crime scene he guarded back in his early career. A father who came back from the war without proper psychological consultation woke up one morning to the garbage truck disposals outside. The sound must have triggered something because he mistook his family for the enemy. Grabbed the nearest weapon his could to 'defend' himself. The ending result was brutal. Seconds after coming to, he shot himself in the head.
Sasuke wavers in the doorway, gaze low to not look up at her gaping chest. As though the nozzle of a shotgun had been pressed against her and blasted. He sneezes.
If Sasuke wasn't cold already, he's arctic now. Teeth chattering, he drifts through the motions until curled up in Kakashi's bed sheets on his futon. Warm from former use.
-;-
Time passes, Gai leaves after a short whispered – hissing - chat in the kitchen, and he's handed a cup of tea.
Rin spirals around in the background.
"Chop chop, one toe, two toe, throw the baby in the lake~"
Leaning his back against the wall, Sasuke stews in the absurdity of it all. The heck is wrong with this child?
Opposite him cross-legged - silent, and grave – Kakashi gives him a stare as though Sasuke were a suspect in a string of serial killings.
"Were you planning on an overdose?"
Sasuke looks up at the ceiling, sipping his tea and mulling it over. "Doesn't sound very Uchiha. We're all about seppuku and katanas and the blood and the honour. Overdosing is so girlish, don't you think? Very gentle way to go."
"Sasuke."
"No chan?" he quirks.
"This is serious."
"Is it?" he asks, words having no feeling to them. "I really don't see the why you're getting so worked up over accidentally misinterpreting the dosage. It could happen to anyone, really. Honestly, I'm thankful Gai-san was around when he was. Today could have taken a nasty turn."
[Given a certain perspective, and his was the unhealthy one]
"A handful is not a simple misinterpretation Sasuke, that's intent," Kakashi squints that beady grey eye of his. "You were committed. I need to know if you are planning to harm yourself or reattempt. I am fucking serious."
Sasuke wonders why Kakashi acts as though he genuinely cares whether lives or not. As though his death was more important than keeping the Uchiha legacy running for Konoha's militarised reputation. As though if he did kick the bucket, Kakashi wasn't worried about the backlash it would have on him.
"I'm really enjoying this conversation, sensei, I mean it – but I'm seriously okay. I appreciate your concern, but this really is a misunderstanding."
For a long, deep second, Kakashi doesn't take his eye off him.
Can I go now?
"Okay. I understand."
"Great," he's in the middle of getting up when Kakashi eye smiles. Nothing good can come of that.
"For the next week you'll be living with me."
Rin's pitched squeals ring through Sasuke's eardrums like a dropped microphone.
He cringes. "Sir?"
"Nonnegotiable. Until I'm satisfied that you are not a walking paper bomb, you are going to stay in my line of sight like a well-behaved toddler, " Kakashi says. "Or would you rather me report this misunderstanding to the Hokage and get you admitted into the psych ward again?"
Blackmail? Sasuke thinks, shaking his head wearily. He's got a decade or more experience than this pretentious little ass and he's blackmailing him?
"You trashy piece of shit."
"This is the thanks I get. Such an ungrateful child," Kakashi sighs forlornly. Standing up and returning to the kitchen, "I'll be cutting off your liquor supply for that colourful disrespect. Nice to know what you really think of me, Sasuke-chan."
Sasuke inhales sharply and bursts into a coughing fit, looking at Kakashi with utmost contempt.
"You – grandpa bitch. What do you expect me to do, kiss you?"
"I expect you to explain to me how you got to this point, take your time, think things over. I won't hound you. I understand better than anyone how you feel right now."
"Highly, highly doubt that."
"Then we'll just have to wait and see," Kakashi says. Pausing in making himself some tea. Contemplating. "You might not know this, but Itachi was in my unit back at ANBU."
Aw hell, Sasuke thinks.
"He came to me before the incident and I didn't listen. If I did, you probably wouldn't be here tonight. I failed him - like Hell I'm gonna fail you. "
He goes on but Sasuke isn't listening. Doesn't want to listen.
Kakashi can't save a person who's half-dead and looking to finish the job.
Listening to his guilt was inappropriate.
-;-
[In hindsight things could have gone a whole lot worse.]
-;-
Under Kakashi's supervision, he takes two tablets of panadol and forces himself to finish the breakfast Gai comes to make for them.
The man is emotionally draining.
Sasuke wonders what drug Kakashi was taking at the time that made it seem like a good idea to befriend the guy.
He was ADHD on crack.
-;-
Team Seven's withdrawn from babysitting Aki.
On the doorstep, Naruto cringes behind him as they listen to Mai sob at Kakashi. Her father passed away.
" – he was supposed to have gotten better. I just don't know what could have caused it. His cold came back out of nowhere – "
And shit, Sasuke thinks, this is awkward.
"The crow," Naruto hisses on their way to missions desk. "I'm telling ya it was the omens, Sakura-chan. My glass cracked yesterday when Sasuke handed me it!"
Jesus Christ.
"He was old," Sakura says. Rolling her eyes. "A man his age trekking from one of our neighbouring villages to Konohagakure would have made him easily susceptible. Nothing otherworldly about it."
"Tch. What do you think, Sasuke?"
Sasuke barely has to open his mouth when Sakura, his saviour, intercepts.
"He doesn't believe in your mumbo jumbo, Naruto. Do you Sasuke-kun?"
"The only thing I believe is that Naruto's an idiot."
"Oi!"
-;-
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