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ABC Thought

- I wander days and nights, looking for the lost you -

Chapter 35

Flashback

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"I love you."

For the first time hearing that affectionate word from her, I was turned frozen.

Shiomi loved me?

I was in shock and at the same time, in doubt.

She's not fooling around, is she?

Yet somewhere inside I had wished that they were real.

"Sesshomaru? Are you alright? Why are you so quiet?"

Confused by the dead silence, Shiomi waved her hands before my face.

What are these… Excited and enlightened feelings?

There was an unexplained heat burning on the skin near my cheeks. Cannot let her notice such embarrassing reaction, I shift my head away.

"Eh?! How mean! How could you turn away after hearing my confession?!"

Clearly was irritated, Shiomi nagged louder while I growled quietly. Is this the mortal feeling that Rin usually speak of? Something called happiness…?

"Do you even realize what you've just told me?"

Keeping calm, I turned around to ask Shiomi to verify her words again.

"Wake up, Sesshomaru! That girl doesn't love you! She never does! Soon she will replace you for another man once you're no longer useful for her benefit!"

Nanase's words pierced through my chest. And no matter how much I tried to deny… My heart was wavered. My mind was confused, clouded with endless doubts.

What you had for me all this time... were they truly your true affections? Or was it just my fantasy?

The moment seeing you standing by Hakuseki's side after spending a whole day searching, my eyes were filled with jealousy. So much that I ended up causing unreasonable actions.

That was very unlikely of me. And yet… I just couldn't control those emotions of mine.

What would I do if you choose another man? Should I give up on you or eliminate my rival? Would I be able to bring myself to hate you after then? Should I leave you right now before you do the same thing to me?

It's hopeless, however. Because in the end no matter what decision I was going to make, the one who got hurt would only be I, myself alone.

Without her, I will…

"Yes, I love you."

Just like a cool and gentle wave, your confession cleared up my doubts.

"What about you, Sesshomaru? How do you feel about me?"

And for the first time in my life, I was contented simply by hearing a few words spoken from a person. Something, which I had thought for a long time was impossible to achieve.

Not to I, Sesshomaru, at least…

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Back to the present.

In the afternoon of the same day.

This scent!

Following the familiar scent in the air, I come across to a deserted small town that was completely destroyed by a powerful force. Taking a walk further inside, I notice these damaged and burnt smells are still new.

Over there!

Sensing an abnormal aura coming from the woods up ahead, I dash straight to that direction.

After getting into the forest, there I spot Sora, who has gotten herself a new outfit with a floral orange Yukata and a white obi that seems to be made out of animal fur. The upper part of her Yukata is purposely worn down to half of her chest and reveals Sora's bare white shoulders. And right under the Obi on her right, the sleeve is split open and gives away her full leg.

Right now she's standing in front of a group of the villagers who are kneeling on the ground. Scattering around them are some of corpses, causing the whole place reeks of blood.

"Please, Mononoke-sama! Spare our lives! We haven't done anything wrong!" (Mononoke: Monster)

The man bows to the white haired woman before him, hitting his head onto the floor multiple of times. While his wife and children hugging each other behind him in fear.

"The more you beg, the more excited I will be when your flesh shatters in my hands."

Sora snickers, her long white tails wavering behind her back.

"No…No! P-Please! I will do anything!"

He backs away slowly, crying when seeing the Kyuubi no Kitsune approaches.

"Die!"

Sora launches forward to strike at his head. Feared for the painful impact, the man cowers. However before her hand can reach him, something appears in the way to stop her.

"My, if it isn't Sesshomaru…"

Her eyebrow raises in amusement.

"Kyuubi no Kitsune, or should I say… Sora?"

The cursed thief who has stolen Shiomi away from me.

"So you've figured it out, huh? As expected from the eldest son of Inu no Taisho, very clever."

Therefore she compliments on his skills. "Though I must say that I'm quite surprised. Since when have a youkai like you become human's hero?"

"Ridiculous, I am defending no one."

I reply firmly, not letting my guard down.

"Somehow what you're saying and doing right now are completely opposite, little boy."

Acting confused, Sora's head tilts. And the moment she steps to the right to get to the villagers, I steps to my left to face her.

"Fine, now that you've come all the way here to find me. I will just play with you instead."

Figures that he is not going to give up on bringing Shiomi back easily, Sora yells the tiny people cowering behind Sesshomaru's back to piss off so that they can be alone.

"Get out of my sight! Before I change my mind and cut you all into pieces!"

"Hurry! Go!"

Not wasting time, the man urges his family to run as fast as they can to the back, far away from the forest.

"Not even bringing a single weapon to defend yourself. How careless of you, Sesshomaru."

Numerous of white fox spirits appear around her as Sora speaks. "Don't tell me you intend to talk things out and hope for miracle to happen?"

"I, Sesshomaru can fight even without a sword."

"Hmph! Arrogant as usual, aren't we? But that's okay."

She charges forward and orders her minions to seize him. "Because today I will beat that damned attitude out of you make you realize your own place again!"

Those small fox spirits are nothing compares to my poison whip. As I easily destroy them and reach out my hand to grab her, Sora vanishes. An illusion?!

"Hey, what are you punching at? I'm right over here."

Sensing the fox's aura right behind my back, I dash away to dodge those white tails of her.

"Or here? Maybe here?"

More of her images show up and attack all at once. Despite having evaded some of them, my body still end ups receiving hit everywhere. And due to getting punched in the face for losing my guard, I get pushed backward to the point almost losing my balance.

Within the next second, they already have me surrounded into a circle as I wipe the blood off my lips, darting my eyes around to search for the real one.

Her illusions…They all carry her scent within them!

"Time to heat some stuff up!"

Sora declares and they begin to cast the spell altogether. "Kitsunebi!"

Watching Sesshomaru struggling inside the magical fire, she continues sending more of them to make sure he won't get out alive.

"Aww… I'm sorry. Was it hot? Here, have some more!"

Trying to get away from Sora's annoying magic, I jump into the air above. Only to have my stomach armor being split into half by Sora's sharp claws.

"Very flexible, I like it."

Sora licks some drop of blood lingering on her fingers. The blue fire below then slowly dies down, leaving behind a round spot of burned grass.

The wind is getting stronger, bringing an earth scent along with it as the sky above turns darken. Multiple of clouds has gathered up into one and soon, some small drop of water start to appear within the air and fall onto the grass below.

"Drip… drop."

"These slow movements of yours must be the results of not resting for days, or maybe even weeks? Yet you still manage to dodge my attacks and stay alive. Pretty impressive."

Sora sneers as her white long hair and clothes are getting soaked by the cold drops. The rain's getting heavier. The gusting winds are blowing, carrying those cold drops of water into wild vortex.

"Tell me son of Inu no Taisho. What is so important about her that you have to risk fighting so much for? Have you seriously fallen in love with a human?"

"She is… A part of mine that I can never let go."

Ignoring all the physical pain coming from injures earlier, I answer and look straight into those same red, cold eyes. Feeling so familiar yet at the same time, so distant.

"Is that how it is… Can never let go, you say?"

Sora tilts her head, brushing those long wet hair out of her bare shoulder.

"Well then, shall I share with you one good news regarding to Shiomi-chan?"

Just as she has predicted, Sesshomaru loosen his guard right after hearing that name and Sora launches forward, tackling his body down to the wet ground within a heartbeat.

"Shiomi's soul, which is the only thing remain of her, has been long devoured into the darkness of soul realm. It is I who has pushed her down there and it is also I, who has watched her light's completely disappeared."

Leaning closer and grabbing his face, she glares into those determined, fearless amber eyes before whispering into his ears.

"I killed Shiomi. And there's nothing you can do to save her."

Her sharp nails pinch onto his cold cheeks, drawing out some red warm liquid out of his skin. Letting it gets mixed up with the raindrops and falls into the earth below.

"She is dead and this very body belongs to me!"

For every single word of her, they turn into invisible knives and stab through his heart.

"There we go… Now that's the rare expression that I've always wanted to see, Sesshomaru-sama."

Witnessing such painful, vulnerable look on the lord's face. Sora grins in satisfaction.

"Instead of eliminating you for good by absorbing all of your delicious life-force or creating a pretty hole right here..."

Sora licks a corner of her lips, sliding her thin fingers down to his chest. She chuckles when seeing his fangs cringing so hard to the point drawing blood on his lips.

"Watching you suffering, letting these guilt eating and destroying you from the inside slowly till dead is so much more pleasant."

Sora then releases her grips on the man's stiff face. His mind is blackened and longer having a will to act.

"Heh heh heh I cannot wait to see your broken self the next time we meet. Farewell, son of Inu no Taisho."

With a simple bid of goodbye, the nine-tailed fox vanishes into thin air.

While I remains lying on the cold, wet ground. Pale lips have turned frozen, weakly gasping for air as body completely paralyzed by the hurtful truths.

It…can't be happening! She can't be…!

"No…!" Torn by this pain, I paint your name in sound. "SHIOMI! ! !"