Chapter 33: Ghosts

The first time Sans actually got to meet the ghosts up close and personal came during his very first breakfast at Hogwarts, and went about as well as could be expected.

Sirius had—half literally—made sure to drag the sleepy skeleton downstairs in time for food. He'd shoved his friend into a seat and nudged a bowl of dry cereal his way. Then, fairly shortly after eating his own meal, he had skived off somewhere else: probably going to find Harry, actually. Regardless of where the dog had gotten to, he wasn't here.

Which was a real shame, since a quick canine distraction might have come in handy. And, well, he probably would have found the whole scenario to be positively hilarious.

It started with a pun, because of course it did.

"don't look now," he said, leaning over to Luna conspiratorially, "but we've got a spectral spectator. think he might be a bit spooked by me?"

Luna immediately turned to look, as expected if not requested. Sure enough, they were being watched. The ghost of a generously sized monk was floating just past a small group of Hufflepuff students, staring at Sans with a puzzled mix of confusion and amazement. When he noticed them looking back, the grayish-silver color of his face became slightly more opaque in what was probably the ghostly equivalent of an embarrassed blush. The spirit drifted over to join them at the Ravenclaw table, looking a tad sheepish.

"Do pardon but…" The sentence petered off, as the ghost sounded like he wasn't quite sure how to say what he wanted to say. "Did you know that you're positively glowing?"

Sans blinked, glancing down at himself to check that the glamour hadn't shorted out or something equally inconvenient. It just looked the same as usual, pale and white but certainly not luminescent. He gave his fingers an experimental wiggle.

Finding everything to be normal, he gave the ghost a quizzical look. "uhm… no?"

"Indeed you are, young man," came another ghostly voice from directly behind him.

Close behind him.

Sans, unused to being snuck up on, startled fairly badly. He had been caught off guard before, and, to grossly understate things, it never ended well for him. Or for the rest of the dimension, actually.

Luckily in the instant it took him to get halfway through forming a shortcut and freezing the ghost blue, his mind managed to catch up with his reflexes and reminded him that vanishing in front of people was not a good plan. As was successfully casting magic on a ghost without even a wand, probably, so he swiftly dropped the blue magic. He was still itching to turn the specter blue—the appearance of his left eye flickered ever so slightly, but thankfully nobody seemed to notice.

Sans took an unneeded breath, fixed his smile in place, and turned around on his seat. "heya. that's no way to great a new pal, sneakin' up on me like that." He chose to ignore the hypocriticalness of that, given the way he always greeted the kiddo. "i 'bout gave up the ghost there."

The ghost who had snuck up on him—probably accidentally—had curly hair, a mustache, goatee, and a flamboyant hat decorated with a very large feather. He was also giving Sans a peculiar look, and rubbing at his chest with a small frown.

It was weird seeing ghosts looking like humans, rather than the indistinct hiding-under-a-bedsheet look that he was used too. Honestly, these ghosts weren't at all like the ones he was familiar with from the Underground. For one thing, it would seem that these ghosts wore clothes, and that those clothes were whatever they had happened to have on at the time of their deaths. For another, they weren't alive.

He had learned that only a few moments before, when he whiffed blue magic through the ghost; it had snagged on something, much like it did on moving portraits, but there wasn't a SOUL there. Not even a twisted fraction of one, as Chara had at the end, but not at all like Flowey either. These ghosts were more like… impressions of a SOUL: a record of memory and personality.

For a brief moment, he wondered how the wizarding world would react if he told them that these supposed ghosts didn't really fit the typical definition of a spirit. Probably not well, if he had to guess.

Which wasn't to say that these ghosts didn't have feelings or opinions, because clearly they did. But it did explain why they couldn't interact with the world easily. Napstablook sure hadn't— Napstablook didn't have that problem, having used computers, headphones, and so on with no issue.

Sans firmly reminded himself that his family and friends were still alive, just… somewhere else.

"Hello, Fat Friar," greeted Luna. "Hello, Sir Nicholas."

Presumably the significantly stouter of the two was the so-called Fat Friar and, by process of elimination, the second ghost—who had snuck up on him—was Sir Nicholas.

As Luna and the Fat Friar got themselves completely sidetracked, Sir Nicholas scrutinized the individual of interest: a pale but otherwise unremarkable first year. Save, of course, for the apparent glowing. A little belatedly, the ghost noticed that they had just been scrutinizing each other in silence for quite some time.

"Excuse my poor manners," the ghost apologized, sweeping his feathered hat from his head. "My name is Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington"

Sans blinked, amusement pulling at his illusory lips. "i hope you don't ex-specter me to call you by that whole thing every time i want your attention."

The pun was either missed or ignored entirely.

Instead of recognizing that comedic genius, Sir Nicholas quirked his head to the side and it wobbled curiously on his neck. "You really are glowing, though."

Glancing down at his hands again, Sans shrugged. "gotta say, i'm really not pickin' up what you're putting down. maybe you ghosts are just seeing things." With a grin, he joked, "have you been sleeping well? rest in peace, and all that."

"I assure you, we are not seeing things." The ghost floated a bit lower, presumably wanting a closer look at the odd glowing child, and his head did that odd teetering again—it looked like it might not be attached all the way.

"oh, that sounds like a problem." Sans gave his voice a curve of joking sympathy. "you might need to get your vision checked if you can't see stuff."

Sir Nicholas, who had been reaching one transparent hand out as if to give him a puzzled (and likely ineffectual) poke, paused. "Do you suppose I should?"

Given that the ghost might notice that his composition was far from a typical human should he permit contact, Sans leaned away from him. Unfortunately, he didn't notice that he was shifting into range of a conversational gesture from the Fat Friar until it was too late. A shortcut would have gotten him out of there, but was off-limits for obvious reasons.

There was a slight bump, and an unfamiliar sensation of cold brushing across the top of his skull; he knew what cold was, but of course, being a skeleton, it wasn't something he felt often. Only when magic was involved, and the chill could touch his SOUL.

Then the Fat Friar jerked back, as if scalded, and stared down at his own hand in blatant shock. "I… felt that."

So perhaps a puzzled poke wouldn't have been as ineffectual as previously thought.

"what do you mean— woah, no touchie." Sans dodged a curious ghostly hand, holding up his arms somewhat defensively. "it's ice to meet you, you guys are cool. but i mean that mostly literally, and i tell ya what: freezing is snow joke."

It took a moment for the Fat Friar to catch the puns, and he chuckled heartily once he did.

Sir Nicholas was not as easily distracted by word play, however. "Friar… What do you mean by that?"

"I meant what I said!" he replied, still sounding like he didn't quite believe himself. "I don't know how, but I actually felt that."

Which was weird, Sans reminded himself, because ghosts on this side of the void seemed to be stuck as permanently incorporeal. That had to get really boring for the poor schmucks. As far as he could tell, ghosts couldn't even interact with each other very well: they just pushed back like two opposing breezes.

But Sans—a being made of pure magic with a SOUL—was apparently a solid presence to them.

He wasn't too interested in puzzling out how exactly that worked quite yet, though the whole made-of-magic point was probably most of the answer anyway. Still, he was interested in getting out of this conversation as soon as possible.

"welp, uh, i'm done eating, so guess i'll just—"

"But, Sans," Luna cut in, concerned, "I only saw you eat one spoonful of cereal."

He stood up, careful to avoid the floating specters, and shoved his hands deep into his pockets. "yep, and now i'm all full, what a shame." As he was backing away, he gave a relaxed shrug. "gotta go, classes need attending and all that."

Reaching out again, Sir Nicholas said, "You haven't even gotten your course list—"

The head of Ravenclaw house was passing out schedules near the other end of the table, the papers tidily organized by class year. Sans pretended to reach for something tucked away under his robe, and it was simple enough to shortcut the correct packet from the professor's stack to his hand.

"nah, i'm all set." He pulled out the newly-arrived paper and waved it as a goodbye salute, swiftly making his escape while trying to make it not look like he was trying to escape. "see thr-you later. bye luna."

She looked entertained, at least, and returned his wave with one of her own. The pair of ghosts watched him as he walked out, leaning together and whispering to each other so quietly that no living ears would be able to overhear. Just before he stepped out, he saw a third curious ghost drift over to join them.

Sans, somewhere between concerned and amused, had the feeling that this wouldn't be his last run-in with the school's so-called spiritual side.

Author's Note:

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Undertale.

Get spooked, ghost!

Happy Thanksgiving!
Yaknow, this chapter probably would have made a better Halloween special. What with the ghosts and such. Welp. Oh well.

Usual updates are on the first of the month. This one's just a bonus!
I wanted to say an extra special thanks today, it being Thanksgiving and all, so here we are! Thank you so much for every review, favorite, follow, and even just reading through. Your support is amazing, and I'm always so thankful that you seem to be enjoying the story!

Also, I've finally found some time to play some of Deltarune. It's really fun so far, and already had a lot of moments that spooked me or made me laugh!

See ya on the flipside, everyone!