He remembered, as though it happened just yesterday.
He was in Human World after breaking into the Spirit World and stealing three artifacts with Kurama - the famed Yoko Kurama in human form - and another demon called Gouki. Gouki was weak, losing a fight against a human who called himself a Spirit Detective, and Kurama was too soft-hearted, almost sacrificing his own life to save his human 'mother', but Hiei was different. He was strong and he would find Yukina. That was, until the Spirit Detective ricocheted his Spirit Gun off a mirror and into Hiei's blind spot, and just like that, Hiei lost to a human of all things.
He was, unbelievably, on parole with Kurama for their individual past crimes, overseen by Spirit World for a reduced sentence. It was demeaning, but he didn't have time to waste in jail. Yukina was still out there somewhere, and if he was being honest, fighting other demons wasn't the worst thing he could do. Now if only the Spirit Detective and the Buffoon would stop hanging around laughing like idiots all the time. He didn't know why Kurama indulged them in their useless sentimental behaviors, though he would mentally admit to himself and only to himself that their gang of four was strong and they worked better together than he initially thought.
He found her. He found Yukina, and whoever made her suffer will die a hundred, thousand, folds.
"Why didn't you tell her you're her brother?" Kurama asked softly. Hiei knew already from the Forlorn Hope incident, but Human World had truly made Kurama weak. He was a sorry excuse for a demon.
For some inexplicable reason, Hiei looked away. "She'll be happier not knowing."
Kurama was a self-sacrificing idiot at the Dark Tournament, and Hiei would have murdered him and his opponent if Yusuke didn't get to the opponent in the fighting ring first.
They had defeated so many strong enemies together and always came out stronger. There was no way Yusuke would actually be killed by Sensui – but he was.
Of course Yusuke would come back from the dead yet again, this time as a half demon. Hiei wasn't sure why he was even surprised. The relief that overcame him when he saw Yusuke alive and well, Hiei would never tell. Unfortunately, Hiei was pretty sure the other three idiots knew anyway.
xxx
Yusuke woke up with tears streaming from his eyes and a wide helpless smile on his face. He laughed, covering his tearing eyes and smiling mouth with his hands, and then laughed some more.
That was Hiei's memory. His Hiei.
He felt like an absolute mess and yet also strangely light. Throwing Yusuke back to the good old days and seeing them through Hiei's eyes made him hopelessly fond and nostalgic. He missed his gang and those days when everything was much simpler and could be solved with his fists.
Now…
Yusuke mentally whacked at the tendril of Mist that attempted to creep into his mind.
"Can't blame me for trying," Mukuro said, shameless, and Yusuke rolled his eyes. Of course he couldn't catch a break.
"Good morning to you too," Yusuke said aloud, wiping away his tears as he sat. He took in his surroundings. Mukuro was on the bed across from him, still skinny and worn and haggard, but somehow looking better in the warm sunlight streaming in from the open windows of the cabin.
Everything around him was wood and greenery, simple but natural, not a sharp edge to be seen. The cabin wasn't so much as built as it was grown, coaxed to naturally take the form of a livable interior over time. Yusuke touched the bed he was on and wondered how long it took Kurama to grow the entire cabin.
"You're awake now, I see," a voice came from behind the closed door, right before it opened and Kurama stepped through. He handed Yusuke a wooden cup of something that smelled sweet and tart, and Yusuke took it with a 'thanks', even as he could feel Mukuro's disapproval and exasperation in the back of his mind.
Hey, at least it tasted pretty good.
"Creepy much?" Yusuke said, nodding at the door to indicate how Kurama somehow knew to arrive at the perfect time right when he awoke.
Kurama smiled. "This is the heart of my territory, Yusuke," he said mildly, just as a part of the floor in front of Yusuke's bed rose until it shaped itself into a chair. Kurama sat down, hair swaying as he tilted his head to the side. "Concerned?"
Yusuke grinned and took another sip of his drink. "Probably should be."
"But you're not," Kurama said, a glimmer of amusement in his eyes.
"I think my Kurama and Hiei were too fond of me," Yusuke said, tapping a finger against his head to indicate the memories he just saw from Hiei.
Kurama leaned in, his eyes vivid and gold. "Do you think memories from another self from another world would stop us if we truly wish to cause you harm?"
"I think you would have if you wanted to already," Yusuke said. He tipped his cup back and finished the last of his drink. "Reciprocation and a sign of trust, remember?" Yusuke placed the empty cup onto the floor, and somehow was not surprised to see the wooden cup meld back into the floor. He idly wondered how many secret rooms in the cabin he could not see and what they contained, but was not too concerned by the answer either way. "Whatever I saw from Hiei's memory, I bet he saw equally as much from me and told you."
"I can tell you guys more, if you want," Yusuke offered. His lips quirked. "You kinda already know my biggest secret already, after all. Everything else I know kinda pales in comparison compared to being from another world."
He knew he got Kurama's attention when his tails twitched with interest.
"But first," Yusuke said, sitting straighter and sterner as though he was negotiating a deal, even as he let his words dangle for so long in suspense that it was clear that he was joking around, "tell me why." His voice softened, unable to keep up his joking attitude when it came to this. "Why approach me? Like you said, why would you guys care about some alternative self of yours and their memories?"
Kurama was smiling when Yusuke looked at him. "We didn't care, initially," Kurama admitted, and Yusuke's heart ached a little despite expecting that. "But you did, in your own way, just like the you in our dream. Bringing Hiei and I together, meddling in our lives… it was the best thing that happened to us, however much we hate to admit. And when we paid attention, it turned out you were everywhere."
Yusuke raised an eyebrow at the last part, because while he did meddle in their meeting, he most definitely did not stalk Kurama and Hiei as much as Kurama made it sound. He was in the living world most of the time, alright, because he couldn't bring himself to be in the same world as them when they didn't know him. It was much easier to hang around in the developing Human World that was very much foreign and new to him at the time instead.
"You don't believe me?" Kurama asked, light and amused, and Yusuke just knew he was being set up for a ribbing but he couldn't tell how. Kurama pressed his hand against his chair as he stood, and the chair returned to the floor like it was never there. Yusuke wanted to comment on Kurama flexing on him with the same trick as the wooden cup, only the flow of power continued throughout the cabin even after the chair was gone. Yusuke could feel small tremors throughout the cabin as something unseen shifts. "Follow me."
"Secret room?" Yusuke asked hopefully, but Kurama led them outside. Hiei was sitting in a tree a distance from them, eyes closed with his back against the trunk. He didn't acknowledge them, but Yusuke had no doubt he was aware. That tree did have a good vantage point of the cabin, after all.
There was a sweet-tart scent in the air, exactly the same from the drink Kurama gave him earlier, and it took Yusuke a moment to realize it was coming from the vines around the cabin that are now bearing small round yellow fruits. They shone brightly against the green vines like Christmas lights.
Yusuke reached for one and when Kurama didn't stop him, he plucked it off the vine. He bit into the fruit and the same tart-sweetness poured into his mouth. It didn't take more than two bites before he polished it off. When he looked back up, the fruits were now turning bright red and he realized that it was the fruit vine that Kurama was pouring his energy into.
"Try one more, it's ripe now," Kurama said with a small indulgent smile. Yusuke didn't need another invitation. He took another and this time, the flavors were somehow deeper. Whereas before it was tart-sweetness, now there was an underlying flavor that made the fruit go from good to addicting.
"Why did you give me the unripe one before?" Yusuke asked, reaching for a third, and Kurama chuckled. "This one is so much better."
"These vines are finicky and require a lot of care to grow," Kurama said. "I grew them initially for the aesthetic and protective quality." Yusuke eyed at the vine warily because that definitely meant deadly, and then mentally shrugged and grabbed another fruit anyway. "Both Hiei and I don't care too much for their fruit, so I rarely take the effort to expedite its growth. It produces fruit naturally every thirty years by itself and we take some then."
"I'm guessing it hasn't been thirty years since the last fruitting yet?" At Kurama's nod, Yusuke grinned. "Aww, thanks, man. Way to make a guy feel special."
Kurama laughed. "It's not only for you," he says, teasing, and there just had to be a joke Yusuke was missing, but what -
From the distance, something leapt at Yusuke.
Yusuke's arms shot up, on guard, only to drop at the last minute to catch it instead.
"Puu!" Puu exclaimed, snuggling against him. Yusuke barely had time to wonder why he was here before Puu hopped out of his arms to plastered himself against the wall of vine fruits next to Kurama.
"Hello Puu," Kurama chuckled, ruffling Puu's hair.
"Puu!" Puu exclaimed again, this time muffled from all the red ripe fruits he was stuffing himself with.
Yusuke glanced over at Hiei, who didn't react to Puu's sudden presence, much like Kurama, even though Puu was making such a commotion there was no way he couldn't have not noticed.
Yusuke was beginning to form a very unfortunate conclusion. Unfortunate because he had never been so mortified and because he was going to rectify that very soon by murdering his Spirit Beast.
It was good while it lasted.
Puu froze in the middle of gorging himself when Yusuke's shadow fell upon him, casting him in darkness. He slowly raised his head, and at the sight of Yusuke's smiling face and vein-twitching forehead, he promptly bolted with a cry of terror.
"Puu!" Puu barrelled into Hiei, nearly knocking him off the tree.
Hiei's eyes snapped open. "What is it, beast?" he hissed, even as his arms instinctively went around Puu.
In reply, Puu bounced off Hiei's arm and dashed up his shoulder to behind his back, just as Yusuke arrived at the base of the tree.
"Hey Hiei, can I talk to my Spirit Beast for a second?" he called, a smile still firmly on his face.
There was death in his eyes.
Hiei looked between Yusuke with his murderous intent and Puu cowering behind his back, and then finally glanced over at Kurama in bemusement, only for Kurama looked back at him with an amused smile.
"You ran to me for safety?" Hiei finally deadpanned over his own shoulder at Puu, still in disbelief, and Puu buried himself deeper against his back in response.
"Get down here, you little traitor," Yusuke shouted, since Hiei was no help at all.
Puu made a noise of protest behind Hiei at the word 'traitor', but wisely didn't show his face.
"Now now, Yusuke," Kurama said, joining them at the base of Hiei's tree. "As you might suspect now, Puu has indeed been visiting us for the past few years without you knowing, but he is also the reason why we're here now. Is that not exactly what you wanted?" Puu peeked out to nod vehemently from behind Hiei. "After all," Kurama said with a teasing smile, "Spirit Beasts are a reflection of their counterpart's soul."
Yusuke groaned, covering his face with a hand. Even so, he could still feel Kurama and Hiei smirking at him, damn it. "Oh, shut up," he said. "I take it that's why you guys reached out to me? Thanks to this little guy?"
Puu chirped, proud, and when Hiei nudged him off his back, he fluttered into Kurama's arms instead. Yusuke flicked his head the moment he was in range, which Puu took as a sign Yusuke was no longer angry so he grabbed a nearby fruit to nibble on, still nestled in Kurama's arms. It was embarrassing how comfortable Puu was with Kurama and Hiei, since that reflected how comfortable Yusuke himself was with them, but it was also nice to see them take a part of Yusuke's soul in stride.
"His energy control is as horrendous as yours," Hiei confirmed, jumping off the tree. "It wasn't hard to notice him following us, however stealthy he thought he was."
"Hey!" "Puu!" Yusuke and Puu protested.
"Also your acquaintance is being obnoxious," Hiei said. "Tell him to stop or I'll make him."
Yusuke raised an eyebrow. "Acquaintance?" he almost asked, and then he felt a miniscule prod at his mind - Mukuro, Yusuke recognized - before it was blocked.
But not by Yusuke.
Yusuke looked at Hiei and chuckled. "Ah, no wonder Mukuro was so quiet the past half-hour." To protect his own mind from foreign intrusion was no easy task, but it was doubly more difficult to protect someone else's mind without them knowing. Only Hiei could have done that. "It was you."
"Not for the lack of trying," Hiei said, grudgingly impressed.
Puu perked up at the new name and Hiei's acknowledgement of Mukuro's skill. He glanced towards the cabin where Mukuro was, curious.
"You can go if you keep your mental guard up," Yusuke said, noticing his Spirit Beast's interest. Puu made a little noise of acknowledgement and grabbed two more fruits in his arms before flying off.
"Well, I feel better about Mukuro invading my mind now," Yusuke said, turning back to Hiei. "I guess he wasn't known as one of the strongest Mists for nothing."
"You're just weak," Hiei scoffed, either uninterested in the Mist part or he already understood from Yusuke's memory.
Yusuke raised an eyebrow at Hiei's words and when Hiei looked back steadily, Yusue took the bait for what it was. When Yusuke's fist lashed out, Hiei's blade was there to intercept it. The two of them sparred - though not before running far enough from Kurama's forest under his warning eyes to avoid collateral damage.
Sparring with this Hiei was familiar in its own way. It wasn't the first time Yusuke sparred with this Hiei, though 'fought' was probably the correct term for most of the previous times, and there were moves this Hiei shared with his Hiei as well. They fell into an easy sparring rhythm as they darted around each other, almost like a well-rehearsed dance, and at last, Yusuke let his thoughts fall away from him like a snake shedding skin.
Hours later, after both Yusuke and Hiei both collapsed on the ground exhausted with grins on their faces, Kurama joined them from the sideline where he was observing. They sat together in silence, gazing at the sky, a bright red joining dark blue like the canvas of an experimental painter.
It was… fun. The banters, the spars, the silence that now sat comfortably among them. It was almost like the good old times from Yusuke's past world.
The thought muted the grin on Yusuke's face, but a small smile remained. It was a hurt but also a good one, like stretching out an unused muscle or experimentally poking at healing bruise.
Yusuke no longer had his Kurama and Hiei from his world, but now he had the Kurama and Hiei from this world instead. He found himself looking forward to (re)discovering all their idiosyncrasies.
But for now, he still had shit to do.
Yusuke let out a loud sigh and finally got up, breaking the silence among them with an additional loud crack from his back. The small smile on Kurama's face and smirk on Hiei's would have been annoying if they weren't so fond.
"I need to head back to Human World," Yusuke said, even though the thought of going back to Human World - to Reborn - caused a twinge in his heart.
Kurama raised an eyebrow, but it was Hiei who commented dryly, "You look eager to go back."
"I have unfinished business, sadly," Yusuke said. He gave them a pointed look, "Like the human in your cabin."
"Kurama's plants could use some fertilizer," Hiei said, and the mild smile on Kurama's face said that he agreed. Yusuke laughed, amused and weirdly touched at the out they offered him.
"Thanks, but I don't think I can do Tsuna dirty like that. I already stole his Mist without a word, I can't also kill him. I'll go back to Human World and take care of that and maybe" - Yusuke looked at them- "I'll come back and tell you more about the other world."
"If you must," Kurama agreed. He tilted his head to the side. "You know you're always welcomed here."
Yusuke smiled softly. "I know."
xxx
A few days later, in the conference room of one of Japan's most prominent law firms, five people sat around a deep mahogany oval table. They were split into two sides by the table, with the last remaining person sitting awkwardly apart, like she didn't know which side she belonged to.
Two people talking to each other across the table, with their respective lawyer offering advice on the side. Their discussion was intense but civil for most part, when the man on the left shot up from his seat and slammed a palm down on the table.
"Why would she get fifty percent of my property after we divorce? She cheated on me, she's not getting a cent from me!" the man exclaimed.
The girl sitting apart from her parents flinched, as her parents' respective lawyers tried to calm both sides down for the third time in the past hour to no avail.
"If you didn't get me pregnant, I wouldn't have to pause my acting career and miss my big breakthrough!" the woman shouted. "Instead, I poured everything into helping you and connected you with the CEO of Company H. Now look at you, ten times your net worth. You owe me!"
The man whirled towards the woman like he was waiting for this. "You?! I earned that myself, fair and square! I - What?!" At his lawyer's insistence, the man ducked his head towards him. When he looked back at the woman, it was with a shrewd look in his eyes. "If you take the kid, maybe I'll give you thirty-five percent and not a cent more."
"Ha, no way you're foisting the kid on me." The girl shrunk into her seat as she felt both lawyers' pitying gaze fall onto her. The woman's lawyer attempted to interject, but the woman continued, "I've already wasted sixteen years of my life on you and her. I'm not wasting a second more."
"Well, someone has to take her. She won't be an adult until two more years!"
"Well, it won't be me! Why don't you take her if you're so fatherly and concerned?"
"Me?" the man said with a nervous laugh. "Girls her age prefer her mother around." Under his breath, he murmured, "Not that you're much of a mother."
"What did you say - ?!"
The girl ran out of the conference room before she could hear anymore, tears welled in her eyes. She knew, of course, she knew. Her father was always more concerned with working than being home, married to a woman he didn't love out of duty, and her mother more concerned with social gatherings, married only to avoid the scandal of having a child out of wedlock. These past five days as both of them negotiated their divorce was the most she had ever seen them for the past year.
She knew neither of them would want her, she knew, and yet –
The girl scrubbed at the tears that fell down her cheeks as she continued running, like she could outrun their indifference and disdain.
It hurt. It hurt so much.
She never had any friends, quiet and reserved as she was. The only time people approached her was when they wanted something from her and after the first few times of going along with them, she slowly withdrew from their company. However desperately she wanted friends, she disliked even more the company of people who took advantage of her.
And now, here she was. No friends, no family. She didn't have anyone, because no one would ever want her.
Her chest hurt, like it was on fire. She wanted so badly to have a family that wanted her, so much that she could die.
I'll do anything, she thought, and in the corner of her eyes, she thought she saw flames flickering on the surrounding walls. Purple flames, to be exact.
The girl stopped and turned, but there was nothing there. Just an ordinary hallway, no flames, much less than purple ones.
She didn't know what to do with the twinge of disappointment in her chest. What did she even expect when she turned around? Flames? Even if there was a fire, there was no reason the flames would be purple.
She put a hand on her chest and breathed in deeply to calm herself. She didn't really want to go back but the meeting should end soon. She should wash up and head back to her parents.
The girl glanced down the hallway, but although the design was like all the hallways she passed by on the way to the conference room, she didn't recognize it. She couldn't see the end of the hallway and when she looked back, she couldn't see the end on the other side either. How far did she run?
She headed back the way she came from, peering at every door she passed, but they were all non-descriptive with no signage. After walking a couple of more minutes, it dawned on the girl that even though it was in the middle of a workday, she had yet to come across anyone else.
The realization prickled the back of her mind. She glanced down the hallway again and it was still endlessly long with not a single soul in sight.
"Hello?" the girl called out, the single word reverberating down the empty hallway. She resumed walking again, if only because she didn't know what else to do. The hallways seemed to pulse and close in on her with every beat of her heart, so much that it was almost claustrophobic.
She had never felt more alone.
"Please," she uttered as she stumbled down the hallway. "Anyone, please."
I don't want to be alone!
The girl suddenly stopped in her tracks, and then very slowly, she looked back. The area she stopped in looked the same as all the other ones she passed, yet… She retraced her steps until she came to an unadorned wooden door, no signage just like all the ones before and after it. She put her hand to the doorknob and twisted, and the door opened with a click.
She hesitated but a warmth in her chest flared, filling her with a courage, a will, that allowed her to step forward. The first thing the girl noticed was all the smoke inside, swirling leisurely about. She followed the smoke in until she came upon a beautiful long-haired woman lounging on a settee, a Japanese smoke pipe in hand and incense lit on the table by her side.
The girl didn't realize she was staring until the long-haired woman tilted her head to the side to meet her eye with an amused smile. The girl flushed. "Ah, I'm sorry to disturb you. I got lost back on the way to the conference room. Can please tell me how to go back?"
The long-haired woman was shaking her head before the girl even finished. It would have reminded her of her father's disappointed head shakes whenever he returned from a business trip and inquired about her studies, but the smile on the long-haired woman's face kept the girl at ease. "You're not lost," the long-haired woman said, calling out her name. "There's no coincidences in life, only fate."
The girl was startled. "How do you know my name?"
"Do you really want to go back?" the long-haired woman asked in reply, and the girl pressed her trembling lips together as she recalled her parents arguing to not take custody of her. "What do you really want? No one comes into my shop unless they strongly desire something."
What do you want? the long-haired woman asked so casually. A question her parents never posed to her in her sixteen years of life, even as they argued over her head for the past few days about her fate once their divorce was finalized.
A tear slipped down the girl's cheek. "I want a family, not the type I had the past sixteen years," the girl said. Her voice was low but steady, like a burning flame. "A real one that wants me."
The long-haired woman looked at her. "All wishes have a price."
"Anything," the girl said, shaking her head. "I'll give anything."
"If you're sure," the long-haired woman started, and the girl was nodding already. "Then I'll grant you your wish. You'll have a family, Nagi," she said, and Nagi didn't know why, but she believed her. The long-haired woman called out her name so gently. "I hope it's everything you wished for."
Nagi didn't know when she blinked but when she opened her eyes again, she found herself in front of the conference room just as her parents were leaving.
"Oh, there you are," her mother said. "Let's go, your father is too busy for us again."
Nagi followed her mother out, lost in thought. The law firm's hallways were the same and yet they felt so different from before, like she met the long-haired woman in another dimension altogether. It made Nagi wonder whether she even did meet her or was it all in Nagi's imagination, driven by despair and loneliness.
Yet even as that thought entered her mind, Nagi dismissed it. It felt too real.
The hope that the encounter gave her was real, flickering deep within her.
She got into her mother's car still lost in thoughts. They were driving home when her mother's phone rang, and as her mother picked it up and her father's voice rang out, complaining about something that he left in the house that he would go back for later, a child suddenly darted in front of the car, chasing after a small red ball.
A man leaped after the child, so fast she almost didn't see him, and Nagi didn't know why, but she distinctly remembered the man swearing, "Fuck, not again," right before her mother swerved and the car crashed into the wall.
Nagi would later realize that the car crash was the best thing that ever happened in her life.
Author's Note: Hello, to be honest, it's been so long since my last post that I was wondering if I should put this story on infinite hiatus - especially since canon KHR and YYH had long been finished. I had half the chapter written for two years but didn't know how to proceed until a week ago, when I opened the doc once again and suddenly it was like I never left.
It was good to be back.
Thanks Sou-chan for beta-ing as always, and thank you - my dear reader - so much for your patience. I hope you enjoyed this chapter.