AoU Slitheen Conversion Anthology (3)

by Slitheeno

Adi Abiola and Henry Talbot are civil servants working in the bureaucratic world of the Ministry for Transport under a mean, bossy Deputy Minister who never fails to bully his staff daily. One day, Abi is sacked unjustly, with Henry helpless to intervene. It is the unexpected intervention of nearby observers that will change their lives - and bodies - forever.

AoU Slitheen Conversion Anthology (3)

(N.B. These shorter Slitheen stories are set between the events of the main Aliens of UNIT storyline. They focus on newer characters featuring in standalone tales as well as stories that will tie in with the main narrative arc. The emphasis will be on exploring conversion.).

(N.B. This is a Slitheen story with mature and adult themes. Not for underage readers. Please read at your own discretion).

(This story is set after the events of: Aliens of UNIT Part Two and Aliens of Torchwood, and before AoU Part Three).

Synopsis: Adi Abiola and Henry Talbot are civil servants working in the bureaucratic world of the Ministry for Transport under a mean, bossy Deputy Minister who never fails to bully them daily. One day, Abi is sacked unjustly, with Henry helpless to intervene. It is the unexpected intervention of nearby observers that will change their lives - and bodies - forever.

…

(Central London)

(The Offices of the Ministry for Transport)

The Star Slitheen Family had replaced the recent British conservative government of homo sapiens, some of the nastiest and talentless humans ever to grace British politics, with Harmony Shoal counterparts. The brain-swapping species, however, proved completely inept at running a nation of humans. After a series of disastrous policy decisions that nearly tanked the economy, the Star Slitheen simultaneously controlling UNIT and Torchwood by this point in their history decided to allow domestic control of Britain to revert back to homo sapien control. The Slitheen and Harmony Shoal would continue to pose as members inside and outside of government, making sure that the humans were utterly distracted and unaware of what was truly going on.

In the Offices of the Ministry for Transport, a pale-white human functioning as a Deputy unrepentantly aligned with the Conservative Party, going by the name of Callum Chambers, had recently been promoted into this position. He was a particularly mean and mendacious fellow, always barking orders at others. The usual Transport Minister had been off 'sick' for the last few months according to the official alibi given to anyone who enquired. In his absence, his egotistical Deputy took charge, acting as if he were the most important person in any room he set forth in. He lived by putting others down. Working in his offices were bureaucratic clerks, civil servants who came from all walks of life. Deputy Minister Chambers generally liked to hire young staff members, easier to bully and manipulate on a whim. Adi Abiola and Henry Talbot were the latest additions to his department. The top-heavy Black British female came from fresh out of university, having enrolled in the Civil Service via an online scheme, whereas the skinnier White British male with conspicuous spots on his face followed in his father's footsteps by applying and getting into the same office based on a good word from his parents. Both were aged twenty two. Both always tried to make the best of bad situations, trying hard to maintain an optimistic outlook on life in twenty-first century Britain.

Although mutually friendly with one another as they cooperated to achieve the same aims whilst working in the Ministry of Transport, neither Adi nor Henry spoke to each other much; only talking when they absolutely had to. They usually worked on their own focused on individual tasks and sometimes in pairs or groupings. It was a horrible space to be inside anyways. Their boss, the Deputy Minister, was always looking for a convenient excuse to scream at them, any staff member, but some more than others. He rarely tolerated open conversations. The low moral staff suspected that he intended to break their will, their sense of independence but for irrational reasons continued to work like slavish automatons.

One day, Adi turned up late to work, by about five minutes. Her public transport had ironically failed to deliver her to her workplace on time even though she had been waiting at her bus stop two hours earlier than normal. In the office, Deputy Minister Chambers refused to accept any excuses. He already disliked Adi and would look for any excuse to get rid of her.

"What time do you call this?" he began in an exceptionally passive-aggressive tone.

"I'm only a few minutes late.". The woman tried to excuse the issue herself but to no avail.

"Do this again and I will have you sacked on the spot, young girl." the boss threatened drastically, placing fear in Adi. Exactly what he wanted. Nobody would dare to report him to HR.

"Pardon me. It won't happen again, Deputy Minister.". It was the only thing she could promise going forwards.

"It better fucking not… Go on, get out of my sight and stop wasting more time. Get on with the work I have set for you or else you are stealing taxpayer money from this proud and magnificent country and its fantastic native people. Shameful!" the man snapped, demonstrating how vicious and unhinged he could be. Adi turned around and left the space in a hurry. Outside the door, Henry was passing by and caught the last part of that troubling statement made by their boss.

"Hey, you okay?" he asked sincerely.

"I'm fine." Adi lied. She knew that her malicious boss had it for her. Another mistake, regardless of how small, and she would be booted out of the place.

"I don't know how much longer I can take with him in charge." the male colleague commented as the duo returned to their desks. He too had been told off by the boss but nothing compared to what words he relayed to Adi.

"Just pray that the Minister recovers his health and returns quickly. Otherwise none of us are going to be sticking around." Adi predicted as she sat down and immediately began her shift.

(A Few Weeks Later)

"WHY CAN'T YOU FOLLOW SOME FUCKING SIMPLE ORDERS, GIRL?!". The familiar loud voice of Callum Chamber's echoed out from his office into his hallways. Weeks passed since the last incident. Adi tried her best to avoid making a single mistake thereafter like she was an infallible angel or something, but her sly boss engineered situations that made it even more difficult. One day, he made Adi run around the department, doing all sorts of errands on a whim, nobody else. Eventually, she rushed into the office and tripped over, spilling a cup of coffee that Callum had requested all over onto his desk, ruining government paperwork in the process. The man was enraged.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! It was an accident!" Adi exclaimed as sincerely as possible, fearing the worst. Onlooking colleagues including Henry heard the incoming noise and gathered outside the office.

"NOT GOOD ENOUGH. IN FACT, YOU HAVE NEVER EVEN BEEN GOOD. YOU'RE FIRED! BACK YOUR BAGS AND LEAVE THIS PLACE AT ONCE!" the bossy leader screeched angrily. Abi felt under a relentless siege. At that crucial moment, an important personality arrived onto the scene as if on cue. He was walking past everyone until he too heard the shouts, piquing his curiosity. Opening the office door without invitation, this senior figure attempted to investigate himself.

"Erm, excuse me but what's with the loud shouting? You could be heard from space.". He was tall and bulky, dressed in a smart navy blue suit. Like the Deputy Minister, he too spoke with an authoritative voice although he was much more gentle in his approach.

"Who the hell are you?! This is not your department, Mr…err…" the Deputy Minister failed to recognise this fellow pale-white individual who spoke calmly and coolly.

"Maxwell. Jacob Maxwell. I am the newly-appointed Chief Inspector for His Majesty's Government. Making sure all the departments are in tip-top condition." The man showed his credentials from his wallet. It seemed legitimate to the intrigued Deputy Minister.

"Oh, right. Nice to meet you, sir. A fellow countryman serving our Majesty's government. It's a sight that puts a smile on my face. But, erm, you cannot inspect my department - or me - without having given prior notification in advance. You know the rules." he protested, feeling less inclined to continue berating his subordinate worker before this man. Adi looked on, thanking the Divine for a brief moment of reprieve.

"Minister, I am not here to inspect you or your department. I did, however, hear a lot of unusual commotion from your direction. Naturally, I wanted to investigate. That is my job." the Chief Inspector explained before smiling politely. He cast a few glances over to Adi and Henry, who was peering his head into the office, every now and again during the conversation.

"Oh, it was nothing. Just me giving the young and upcoming generation a stern talking to. If you ask me, they need a jolly good smacking these days. A very arrogant bunch." Callum Chambers openly rationalised his mistreatment of his entire department, including poor Abi. Another voice, this time noticeable feminine called out from behind Jacob Maxwell.

"Oh, really? I detected something more vicious in your language, Deputy Minister…" it said. A large pale-white woman with dyed brown hair turned up on the spot with a cold look of disgust towards the leader of the government department, as if she disapproved of his existence. She too was smartly dressed in a suit, noticeably dark green in colour.

"And you are…?" he wondered again. Callum Chambers was not used to being subjected to critique by his fellow peers. Normally, they let him get away with bullying the young and vulnerable. He found this intervention personally troublesome. Unjustifiable.

"Junior Inspector Polly Chambers." the rotund woman stated, also boasting an authoritative voice. She smiled at Adi and Henry momentarily as if she was glad to see them then she returned to her cold stare at the bossy Minister.

"Fucking hell, how many of you lot are there in my department today?". Anxiety was creeping in. Callum Chambers felt that the government was launching an internal investigation of his department. They wanted to get rid of him. What else could explain the arrival of these meddlesome inspectors who were disrupting his usual forms of entertainment?

"More than enough. We are steadily increasing our ranks.". The response sounded like a direct tease.

"I told you already, Chief Inspector. This little girl has proven absolutely inept in her role serving this country and our Majesty's government. I have decided to get rid of her. Permanently. She is nothing more than a drain on our resources." the vicious Deputy Minister stared down Abi Abiola, clearly disgusted by her continued presence in the Ministry.

"Have you at least followed the employment termination procedures?" Polly enquired on behalf of the abruptly sacked employee.

"No need. Miss Abiola has not fulfilled her probation period. Her contract states that I can fire here unconditionally and at any time prior to its completion date." the callous Deputy Minister responded with a massive grin on his face, delighting in humiliating the female and making her feel miserable. The Inspectors surmised that he was sadistic in speech and action.

"That's very harsh. I think Adi will be getting in touch with her union representatives. We will help her seek justice." the Junior Inspector took her fellow female's hands to make her feel valued, something she appreciated silently without having to express in words.

"Well, you can take thing away with you! She is not welcome in these departments fact, she never belonged with us. Insolence and disrespect for your seniors will be punished severely. Know your place." the government official barked at poor Adi who looked as though she was going to burst into tears. The Inspectors decided to step up their intervention further.

"I think that's quite enough disrespect shown by you towards a fellow human… prrrp!" Inspector Maxwell cautioned his interlocutor prior to unleashing a spontaneous fart loudly in public. He did not seem embarrassed at all, unusually.

"Did you just… release flatulence?" the perturbed Callum Chambers asked openly, seeking confirmation of his experiences. It was a taboo in British human culture. Not that the Star Slitheen cared much for civilised norms.

"Yes, I did. Do you have a problem with that as well? What don't you have a problem with?" Jacob snapped for once, revealing his annoyance with this homo sapien.

"No, I-I just think its…" the human tried hard to hedge his response, not wishing to offend his peers.

"What? Out with it, man!" Chief Inspector Maxwell bellowed at his interlocutor who felt compelled to speak the truth at once.

"It's, erm, strange…Oh, whatever. Just leave my office now. My words are the law around here. Good luck at the jobcentre, Adi." the Deputy Minister chuckled callously as he tried to sit down. His ego only knew one thing - growth. That meant putting others down so he could feel good about himself.

"Fucking hell, you ever heard of manners and basic decency?!" The passive observer Henry self-activated and moved his way up to the desk besides Adi and the other Inspectors, enraged at the poor treatment his fellow Briton was receiving at the hands of this nasty, hierarchical and not-so-subtly racist figure, a junior personality who did not really wield any significant power outside his own department. He was a tyrannous dictator that needed to be fought. Brought down irreversibly. Henry was spurred on by the natural, innate drive to seek out justice.

"That's enough of your cheek, boy! You will shut up and get on with the work or I will have you sacked as well." the bossy man screamed non-discriminatorily at Henry, striving to reassert his uncontested dominance in front of the Inspectors, making it clear to them that he would never relent without a fight. Henry gave up cowardly, returning slowly back to his work station like an automaton. He had to repress any heroic activity to survive. By standing up to his boss for a black woman, Henry knew his own cards were marked. His whiteness that he shared with Callum Chambers saved him from an immediate sacking but he was not indispensable.

"Good day to you, Inspectors!" Callum Chambers authoritatively finished the conversation that he started on his terms. Adi had been sacked unceremoniously, whilst the rest of the department retreated amidst an atmosphere of fear.

"Ignore that twat, Adi. His day of reckoning will come slowly but surely." Inspector Polly Chambers whispered to the jobless human. As everybody else left, she remained in the office herself, conversing intensely with the same Minister about a certain matter. He tried to avoid conversation but was compelled to listen as Polly stated it was a government affair. Jacob stayed with Adi after her sudden dismissal.

"How about I take you back to my place? Have a cup of tea? Get your mind off things?" inspector Maxwell offered randomly. This was the first time he met Adi. They never had any acquaintances prior to this meeting. It did seem odd that a stranger at least twice her age was requesting that she accompany him back to his place of residency. Adi, however, felt absolutely wounded by this point. She needed assistance, comfort. Willing to accept any compensation.

"Erm…sure." Adi was out of a job. She did not know what she was going to say to her parents. They were counting on her contributions to pay the monthly bills and put food on the tables. Delaying the inevitable talking to her mother and father, the human female decided to accept Inspector Maxwell's kind offer in the meantime. The duo left the premises, travelling by car across the capital up north. After finishing her chat with the Minister, the large Polly Chambers strutted about in the department, looking for somebody in particular - Henry Talbot.

"Excuse me…Henry, is it? I would like to have a quick chat with you." she said with a beaming smile that put the human male into a trance-like state. Why did she want him in particular?

"Erm, I can't leave. My boss will get mad at me." Henry replied cautiously. He looked up and around to make sure that his malicious overlord was nowhere to be seen.

"Oh, don't worry about that. He's given you full permission to chat with me. Come along then." the Inspector allayed her counterpart's necessary fears. Happy to leave the cruel workplace earlier than expected, Henry accompanied Junior Inspector Polly Chambers across the capital, to her cosy residency in the eastern suburbs. He did not question why they had arrived but strangely, he trusted Polly despite this being their first ever interaction. Heading into the flat, the Inspector made sure that the homo sapien was generously received with some tea and biscuits in a wide and spacious setting.

"You do not have to stay for long, by the way. As an inspector working on behalf of our Family - erm, I mean 'His Majesty's Government' - I am intrigued to know how that department functions under the management of that dictatorial monster. I thought you would be willing to tell me everything. My house is a safe place. Shall we start?" Polly explained before she sat comfortably opposite to her human counterpart on a sofa.

"Erm, okay." Henry felt that he could not say no. He found the Inspector to be very attractive. He seemed bewitched into staring at her large and uneven body, her infectious facial smiles. Polly knew what he was doing but did not seem to mind at all.

"Paaaarp!... Uff, that was a loud one, wasn't it? Hahaha, ignore me!… Whatever you choose to tell me will remain strictly confidential.". After apologising civilly, the question and answering session then began…

…

Meanwhile, over in North London, the duo of Adi Abiola and Chief Inspector Jacob Maxwell arrived at the latter's fabulous four bedroom mansion house. It was a luxurious place of comfort. Ostentatious in every sense. Boiling a kettle of water, Inspector Maxwell had the human woman seated on a finely-crafted wooden chair in the main living room.

"You have a lovely place, Chief Inspector. I can only dream of this." the human complimented her counterpart. Her last paycheck would be arriving after this month and then she would need to find another job.

"My house is your house, Adi. Get comfortable whilst I get the tea ready.". She continued looking around the room and read the headlines of a nearby newspaper whilst patiently waiting for Jacob to reappear before her eyes. After ten minutes, that large human walked into the room with hot, fresh tea.

"So are you glad to finally be done with that place?". The Chief Inspector appeared to be taking an unusual interest in the future plans of this homo sapien. They sipped the tea as they spoke.

"No… I am a failure… my parents, they are not going to like me after today…" Adi teared up a little as she spoke. The events earlier that day weighed heavily on her mind.

"Cheer up. A new pathway opens up for you." Jacob attempted to reassure the woman opposite him though his words did not sound all that sincere.

"No, I can't handle it anymore. Life is so unfair, so cruel and harsh…" the woman began to break down by sobbing. She looked absolutely pathetic. Once he finished his tea, Jacob decided that something more drastic was required by this point.

"Abi?" the Inspector suddenly spoke up, rising to his feet, overshadowing the sedentary female.

"Yes?" the human stopped crying temporarily.

"Can I show you something?" he asked suddenly, seeking permission.

"Yes. What is it?" Abi had no clue what it could be.

"I am going to let you in on a big secret of ours, the Inspectors in the government departments, they are not who you think they are. You cannot tell anyone though." the 'Chief Inspector' announced bizarrely. It intrigued Adi to know more. He was hinting at something much bigger behind the scenes.

"Well, who are they then?..." Adi wondered. Jacob remained silent momentarily causing suspense in the room to build up.

"I am not going to tell anyone your secret. You can trust me. Tell me please." the woman pleaded for the information to be leaked to her.

"Well, it's not something that I 'tell' people. It's something that needs to be, err, shown." the man teased with a smile.

"Okay, go on." Adi was really keen to know what on Earth this person was hinting at.

"Prrrrp!... You promise you will do anything silly? No screaming or running out?". His sporadic gas exchange kicked into effect for the first time. Adi did not seem to realise it.

"I promise." she declared solemnly. It must be something big, she reasoned in her mind.

"Very well. Here goes…". The man tugged a hidden zip on her forehead away to the left forcefully, unleashing a delightful gasp. A shiny blue light appeared on the horizon that lit up the whole room accompanied by an electric hum buzzing. Rooted to the spot, Abi's eyes were immediately transfixed on this abnormal phenomenon. She realised instantly that 'Jacob Maxwell' was not a human, but something, someone physically different.

"HAHAHAHA!" guffawed the sentient being emerging out of Jacob Maxwell's skin…

…

Over in East London, 'Junior Inspector' Polly Chambers was finishing her verbal enquiry with her guest, Henry Talbot.

"Thank you for all of your responses. I am sure this will be very useful to my seniors monitoring this government." She said with a very creepy, polite smile.

"You are not going to write any of this down?" Henry wondered how the Inspector was going to remember anything after a season that lasted nearly an hour.

"No need. I have a fantastic memory." she claimed.

"Is that everything then? I really need to get back to the office. The Deputy Minister will not appreciate my being gone for too long. There is a lot of paperwork to be done. I don't want to fall behind.". It was obvious that Henry was a terrified homo sapien, slavishly devoted to a line of work that colonised his life but did not give him much meaning. It was made altogether worse that his boss was mean 24/7.

"Forget about him. He is a knobhead." the Inspector declared unusually, decisively breaking from her earlier excessive politeness.

"No, I need to leave. I agree though, he is a fucking knobhead". Henry looked at the time. It was getting close to the end of the working day shift. He was afraid of upsetting his boss and ending up sacked like his other colleague, Abi. His heart started beating faster.

"Okay, I will let you go. Just one final thing before you leave, to wrap up our session. Please sit back down." Polly gestured for the male to take up a seat again. He did as he was told without question, praying that whatever this inspector was about to do would be over quickly. She did not take her seat like before but instead moved firmly into the centre of the large living room, maintaining eye contact.

"I want you to enjoy this. Don't be afraid. Enjoy the spectacle. For your eyes only." the woman teased which left the younger man highly confused. Raising her hands to her forehead with a tremendous grin of her mouth, the female peeled back her human skin, gasping sharply. The room immediately went dark blue and a loud electric humming ensued. Slowly, the recognisable human face of Polly Chambers began to peel away. Instead, a dark green bald head with a cute face sporting droopy black eyes popped out with an almighty groan. Then the shoulder and chest of 'Polly's' body gave way in tandem with more noises. An unidentifiable 'alien' creature was beginning to emerge from the human skin; it had incredibly long forearms complete with three razor sharp claws that it was keen to show off. It possessed a massive belly that it had previously packed inside of Polly. Finally, the last part of the skin suit slid off onto the floor. Within a minute's unveiling, the normal room lighting returned and a great being - nearly reaching the high ceiling above - emerged in its desired 'naked' state. It was tall. Massive. Extremely impressive, objectively analysed.

"Aaaaaargh! W-what are you…?!" A terrified Henry Talbot instinctively squealed as he flew out of his seat in fear and backed up against a nearby wall. The thing that came out of Polly covered the exit points. He felt trapped and powerless before an overwhelming predator.

"I am Slitheen!…oooooh, so good to be naked again!" The Raxicoricofalipatorian woman announced proudly as she flexed her tight muscles. It was as if she were showcasing her impressive physique to the human male. She gave him ample time to adjust to the abnormal situation, pretending he did not exist. After a few minutes of showing no interest in him, Henry reasoned that he was not going to be this thing's dinner.

"Hehehe, feel free to touch my body, human. Don't worry, I would never seek to harm you." the thing that emerged from Polly stated. For some reason, Henry felt obliged to respond positively. Walking forwards slowly, he finally managed to establish physical contact, touching the thing's massive forearms. They felt very muscular. It made him feel intimidated. Impotent.

"That's it, Henry. Gentle strokes." the being encouraged the homo sapien to continue his actions. She giggled a little with each touch she received. A genuine rapport was establishing itself.

"Who are you?" He finally had the courage to ask once it became clear that the non-human had little interest in killing the homo sapien male. His admiration for this being was only growing.

"I am a Raxicorifallipatorian belonging to the Slitheen Family. The Star Slitheen branch, actually. My real name is Humeera Shazi El Bul Fashfar Star Slitheen, at your service." The woman declared, bowing her head courteously. She appeared to be capable of behaving in a civil manner.

"Humeera?… someone in my secondary school has that name, I think. No… oh yes, I remember, her name was Humaira. My bad." Henry recalled an old classmate that he fancied once upon a time but he was too afraid to ask her out on a date. He confused the two names by accident though they did sound identical. The Slitheen continued to stretch herself silently. Only her heavy breathing could be heard. The troubled homo sapien looked at the messy skin suit on the floor in a simultaneous manner of fear and fascination. How did the gigantic Slitheen manage to fit herself inside of that?

"Easy mistake, I guess. Although I know many Humairas myself." the Slitheen subtly hinted at other members bearing that nice-sounding name in her Family, a phenomenon that the human was not totally aware of himself yet.

"So you are an alien, posing as a government inspector. Right…" the human struggled hard to make sense of the rationale. He was unable to connect the dots.

"I am not an 'alien', Henry. I was a homo sapien once upon a time. My human name was Amanda Houghton. Born and bred on these very isles. A northerner hailing from Merseyside. As a result of a fortunate chain of events, I found myself being converted into my present form, voluntarily adopting the proper Raxicoricofalipatorian forename of Humeera Shazi - Humeera means 'Joyful and Pleasant', by the way. I currently pose as Polly Chambers wherever I have to interact and work within the stifling confines of human society." The Slitheen convert who went by the permanently adopted name Humeera revealed candidly before she picked up the skin of Polly Chambers and mechanically placed it neatly on a hanging rack, showing no emotions as she performed the task.

"Converted?" What did that entail, he thought loudly. How could a human become a Slitheen?

"Yes. It's a long story though. One for another time." The Slitheen woman was not in the mood to tell Henry her transformation backstory. It would take hours, a luxury she did not have at the moment.

"So who was Polly then? A costume?" Henry tried to deduce as he walked up to the hanging rack. The hollowed face started back eerily at the living human which made him feel deeply uncomfortable, glad to be alive. Touching it affirmed that it was human skin in origin. It had been expertly crafted.

"Pretty much." The Slitheen admitted. Humaira had hunted down that homo sapien, killed her and then turned her leftover skin into her own personal outfit, allowing the Raxicorifallipatorian to live a double-life conveniently, serving the business agenda of her Family.

"How did you… actually, never mind, I don't want to know where you got it from." It was disturbing to cogitate over. He dreaded the worst assumption, that this was a real human being once upon a time.

"Quite right." The Humeera Slitheen replied tersely as she chuckled under her breath. She teased Henry by clicking her claws, indicating how it all happened. A violent struggle with only one obvious outcome. He shuddered at his reflexive imaginations.

"She was a major threat to us. I did Planet Earth a selfless favour by taking her out." the Raxicoricofalipatorian justified the killing of Polly Chambers although she gave no immediate empirical proof to back up her claims.

"Your, erm, quite, err…big, Humeera." The human male commented, changing the conversation topic slightly. He remained in awe of his stunning counterpart. He felt inferior.

"I am massive, Henry! Gigantic! Colossus! Makes me very intimidating, doesn't it?" The Slitheen woman proclaimed gleefully. Her emotional personality was on full display. This person enjoyed her existence without shame. Dominant and confident in all of her mannerisms.

"Absolutely. You are awesome. How tall are you exactly?"

"Over eight feet. We all are." Humeera revealed, hinting that there were more of her kind about on the Earth.

"'We'?"

"We are a large Family. Very large and growing by the day." the Slitheen woman revealed candidly. It piqued the human's interest further. Humeera stated that she converted into this form - could the male follow suit too? He was mightily impressed with what he was seeing.

"There are more of you?" Henry wanted to know the exact numerical extent. If Humeera could pose as Polly then the Slitheen could be posing as anybody on the planet, again making him feel more fascinated by these non-humans and their hidden agenda.

"Yes."

"How many?"

"More than you could count!" The Slitheen exclaimed ecstatically before laughing loudly. Humankind has no idea what was really going on on their own planet.

"What are you all doing on Earth?" The human finally asked the question that sought to ascertain the purpose of Slitheen activities on this planet. His planet.

"Lots of things." It was a cryptic reply that did little to clarify anything.

"Does your family live together?". Henry was leading his own question and answer session by this point, seeking to gain as much information as possible.

"Do you fancy meeting them?" Humeera simply replied with a crucial question of her own, catching the human off-guard.

"Erm…" Henry was not quite so sure. But the Slitheen already made him feel important. Humeera had obviously revealed her true form for a specific reason. She appeared to have no intention of killing him. Why did they want him?

"Don't worry. We are a lovely bunch. We all come from humanity so we are well-acquainted with your primitive species." Humeera gently stroked the homo sapien's cheeks with a claw, hoping to build further rapport. The Family needed Henry's body, amongst others.

"Alright, I guess.". The homo sapien lowered his defences and voluntarily agreed to meet with Humeera's Family of Slitheen.

"Splendid! Let's head over to the ship now then." Standing in the middle of the room, Humeera pulled out a green necklace from a nearby shelf that functioned as a teleportation device. The Slitheen beamed herself and her human companion over to their spaceship parked over at the central UNIT Britain London HQ.

…

"So who was Jacob?" Abi questioned the Slitheen actor intensively as she keenly examined the skin suit loitering on the wooden floorboards. After ten minutes had passed, the initial shock of watching a Raxicoricofalipatorian unzip and emerge from a human-based disguise had given away to an atmosphere of inquisitiveness.. It was clear that this Slitheen predator did not mean the human any immediate harm and that Abi was to remain alive for a very specific purpose. The mysterious being had also allowed this homo sapien to touch his whole body, leaving the latter deeply impressed and in awe.

"He was the Chief Inspector. Before I had to take over his body." the Slitheen who had posed as his victim revealed nonchalantly, as if murder meant nothing to him.

"You killed a human?!" the answer freaked out the vulnerable female human. This was not a normal, boring day at all.

"Yes, I did. I thoroughly enjoyed sniffing out this primitive human's rotten stench and hunting him down. He screamed like a little girl when I cornered him into a dead end. One swift slash across his face and he entered the afterlife." The Raxicoricofaliaptorian continued demonstrating his absolutely cold, callous nature.

"You don't feel any, err, remorse?" The homo sapien in the room struggled to make sense of things. It felt deeply disturbing to her sense of ethics. She could never imagine killing anybody, unless there was a reasonable excuse such as self-defence.

"Not really, Abi. Jacob was a bully of homo sapiens like your boss - ex-boss, I should say - but also, he was working with some pretty nasty hostile actors not of this planet's origins. I was ordered to take him out for planetary security reasons. So after my successful hunt, I turned him into my personal clothing outfit. We Slitheen have the complete right to do whatever we want to those we hunt successfully. Perks of being members of such a dominant Family. Poor Jacob thought he could dominate other beings. Until he met me." the Slitheen stated emphatically, sharpening his claws to indicate his prowess.

"Well, when you put it like that… I am not judging you, by the way." Abi clarified. She was in no position to do so anyways.

"I couldn't give a shit what you think, human." the calculating predator blurted out rudely in response.

"Someone has an attitude… So you managed to fit your massive body inside the real Jacob Maxwell somehow and continued to pose as him - why?" Abi asked sensibly. Like Henry, she too imagined with difficulty how the Slitheen managed to compress his larger form inside the leftover human skin suit.

"Great question. All will be revealed to you shortly. I hope my wife is ready…" the Slitheen said, stretching his elongated neck forwards to check the time.

"When did you aliens come to our planet?" the human female carried on the line of inquiry.

"First of all, I am not an 'alien'. I take immense umbrage at such labelling. It smacks of prejudice and reveals your utterly ignorant comprehension of reality. Homo sapiens are not the only inhabitants of this silly rock. No, I voluntarily joined the mighty and ignoble Star Slitheen Family. Best decision I ever made in my previous life." the Slitheen snapped with a tone of annoyance.

"'Previous life'?... What do you mean, you 'joined'? You were not a Sli-been to begin with?" Abi wondered, mispronouncing the name.

"Sli-theen, Abi. I can see why the Family took an interest in you, always asking the right type of questions. Good on you. Yes, I was a homo sapien like yourself once upon a time. Not too long ago. I work in an organisation called UNIT. Well, Torchwood actually, but it's too complex to go into greater detail at the moment. We look after the Earth's security. The Star Slitheen has been infiltrating the organisation and instead of murdering every human randomly, they have graciously been converting us into their ranks, mainly because they lack their own organic stock of personnel to carry out missions across the world."

"So what is your name? Your real name?"

"When I was a human, people used to call me Terry Jones. I was born and raised in Glasgow. Upon entering Slitheenhood with no regrets, I chose the replacement name Ezor Voshbek El Bul Fashfar Slitheen. Ezor means 'Deadly' in our traditional culture, by the way. Perfectly suits my nature. Terry is 'dead'. I am not going back. The change is thankfully irreversible." the ex-human revealed, shocking her interlocutor to some extent.

"So there are more of you on Earth then.". That fact did not surprise Abi at all. She was willing to accept a new reality immediately.

"Too many, I would say. We are only going to get bigger. Nobody is going to stop us." Ezor declared sharply. He was fully committed to helping Saba, Hibah, Husna and the rest of his Family of converts successfully complete all of their objectives on this rock. He had left his humanity behind long ago, never looking back.

"What do you want on Earth? Convert this planet into Slitheen-world?" Abi suggested, believing it to be the most logical and likely outcome based on the information she had already received from her interlocutor.

"Hehehe…something like that." the Slitheen man laughed a little. The truth was both simple and complex.

"I suppose we humans are too ignorant, too busy fighting amongst ourselves. Easy for you lot to divide and conquer us." Abi lamented, thinking about how her ex-boss bullied her at work. So much time and energy being directed towards conflict. Humanity was totally unprepared against unwanted interventions in their affairs.

"We need to go." Ezor announced suddenly as a buzzer on the clock sounded out. His spouse was in position.

"Go? Go where?"

"To meet the Family. They request our presence at this instant."

"But I need to go back to my own Family. My parents will start to worry if I am gone for too long… Oh, I don't know what I am going to say to them about what I have undergone today…"

"Young lady, the day that an unrepentant Slitheen predator unzips in your presence is probably the most important moment in your pathetic life as a miserable, jobless and purposeless homo sapien. You would do well to respond positively to the demands of the mighty and ignoble Star Slitheen Family! Forget about everything you already think you know!" Ezor spoke loudly, hoping to impress a sense of urgency and seriousness on his counterpart. It worked.

"Oh…" Abi quietly conceded that he was correct. It would be better to continue being alongside his presence. She did not want to risk angering the Slitheen.

"You trust me? We are not going to kill you." Ezor tried to reassure his counterpart. He picked up his skin suit off the chair, carrying it in one of his arms.

"I know." Abi replied calmly whilst noticing the rubbery costume that was once part of a living human, a member of her species. She believed the converted predator was telling her the truth. She felt important. Wanted. Understood. Something she had not experienced for quite some time. Standing in the centre of the room while holding hands and claws, the Slitheen pulled out a similar necklace transportation. Within a flash, they were beamed over seamlessly to Torchwood HQ at Canary Wharf.

…

A quick dazzling of lightning preceded the reassembling of the physical atoms that made up Humeera Shazi Star Slitheen and her travelling companion, Henry Talbot.

"Wow…" the male said as he adjusted his senses to a new physical reality. They had successfully teleported to another location.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" Humeera spoke rhetorically as she giggled.

"Pretty cool, actually. Where are we now?"

"Canary Wharf, our HQ. This way. Don't want to be too late". The Slitheen woman took the lead whilst the human followed loyally from behind. They travelled across a myriad of halls and corridors, witnessing various Slitheen and what appeared to look like fellow humans engaging in all sorts of activity. Or were they also hiding Slitheen inside their bodies? It was not immediately obvious. This was a massive hub of operations, lots of technical extra-terrestrial equipment being moved around.

"Welcome to Torchwood, Henry." the Slitheen guide stated loudly, knowing the homo sapien would be deeply impressed. Whoever the Slitheen were, they were firmly rooted on Earth and meant serious business. Nobody seemed to mind his appearance, as long as he was with his fellow traveller.

"What is Torchwood, Humeera?"

"It's an organisation that was set up by humans originally. Dedicated to defending the British Empire and all that bullshit. Our Family took over recently and repurposed this Institute to meet our specific needs. Torchwood serves as our domestic intelligence agency. It helps us monitor and control all events that occur in this country. Britain is one of the many bases where we have established a permanent presence, a foothold.". The Raxicoricofalipatorian explained with some pride as she led her counterpart down some stairs and into a central hub zone. There, a small crowd of other unclothed Slitheen were waiting in a messy queue to enter a closed-off room.

"Hi." Henry greeted one of the other Slitheen standing guard at the entrance. It bemused the Raxicoricofaliaptorian man.

"Why is this primitive boy addressing me?" he blurted out with an air of irritation in his voice.

"Pipe down, Guz. He is with me." Humeera clarified with alacrity.

"Oh, Humeera. I didn't recognise it was you haha. Lovely to see you as always." the Slitheen man stated, showcasing some civility with another member of his extended Family.

"Likewise. When does the meeting start?"

"Shortly. We are just waiting for James and Taylor to arrive."

"Thanks.". Humeera shifted with Henry to a side and patiently awaited the arrival of the Torchwood leaders.

"Why did he sniff me?" Henry asked after a few minutes.

"To capture your scent." the Slitheen answered nonchalantly.

"My scent?"

"To determine if you are one of us. We Slitheen have the best nostrils in all the galaxies. We can spot a non-Slitheen ten miles away." Humeera remarked with an unmistakable sense of pride, advertising the best qualities of her kind.

"Oh, very interesting… So there is going to be a meeting?"

"An emergency Family meeting, yes. We need you to be present as well. That is why we are here.". In the waiting crowd that was getting bigger every passing minute, Adi had arrived at this spot five minutes earlier with her Slitheen companion, slipping into a bathroom momentarily before re-emerging. She spotted a familiar face, a familiar species.

"Henry?!" she shouted excitedly from a short distance upon recognising an old colleague.

"Abi?!". He too was thrilled to see a recognisable person, a member of his species. The duo naturally spoke about their immediate experiences with the Slitheen for the next few minutes.

"It's insane, right?" Adi remarked after her human counterpart finished telling his side of the story.

"Tell me about it. Until this moment, I had no idea that aliens existed!" the male exclaimed as the duo looked around at the various Slitheen standing nearby.

"They are not 'aliens', Henry. They are… us." Abi corrected her human friend politely.

"Oh yeah, sorry. You are right. She told me she was a 'convert' or something. I guess your Slitheen told you a similar line." Henry ascertained. The Star Slitheen were therefore natives to the Earth.

"Yep.". Meanwhile the unclothed Slitheen adults who deceitfully posed as Jacob Maxwell and Polly Chambers warmly embraced one another after a short period of being temporarily separated from each other during their day jobs.

"Humeera!"

"Ezor!". The two Slitheen publicly kissed and hugged each other intensely.

"Did you have fun unzipping in front of the boy?" the happy husband giggled with a massive smile on his face.

"It's always entertaining when they have no idea what is going on!" the loving wife responded before the duo laughed heavily together. It was clear to any observer that this couple had fantastic chemistry, a dynamic that helped the Family progress forwards.

"You two are partners?" Abi guessed right.

"We have been for nearly two years now. We first met on a hunt in Somerset. We are happily married together. We have two children, with a third on its way." the Slitheen wife happily revealed. Before the conversation could continue any further, a loudspeaker sounded out:

"ATTENTION! FAMILY MEETING SESSION TO COMMENCE! ENTER THE MEETING ROOM AND TAKE YOUR SEATS ON THE FLOOR!"

The doors opened, allowing the Slitheen family members to take their seats on the floor in a circular format. Henry and Abi sat behind Humeera and Ezor. It felt strange to be present but no other Slitheen took offence at their attendance. Standing at the podium at the centre of the circle in their undressed forms were James Tyler and Taylor Ashcroft, two Slitheen converts who had assisted the takedown of Torchwood under Yvonne Hartmann's dangerous leadership. Since then, Saba Mahmood, the leader of all Star Slitheen operations, had tasked her Family members running Torchwood to perform domestic surveillance and counter-intelligence operations in Britain, freeing up UNIT to focus on more pressing issues globally. But the honeymoon period was long finished: the Star Slitheen in Britain were facing various problems on multiple fronts. James and his wife Taylor were feeling the pressure to deliver concrete results.

"My lovely Family members, so good to see you all. I know we all hate meetings so I will keep it brief… I cannot lie; we are facing a crisis. As you all know, within the last month alone, six members of our mighty and ignoble Family have been murdered by unknown and obviously malicious forces. All of them have been vinegar-ed. It has become an immense embarrassment not only to Torchwood but to the Family." James Slitheen revealed frankly, valuing honesty above all. His wife continued the speech whilst he upheld a deliberate pause.

"We are assembled today to seek practical solutions. Somebody knows we are here, what we are doing on Earth. Not only that, they are looking to kill us. We suspect that there are traitors within our ranks that are leaking out intelligence about our business operations and who our Family members are.". Everybody present apart from the homo sapiens already knew this much. James took over again.

"What is remarkable is that they have all occurred here, in Britain. Nowhere else. That makes it our problem to resolve. We have a duty to avenge the blood of our tragically slain siblings."

"I should…ooooh…" Taylor tried to speak again but stumbled a little. Her body began to ache. Every Slitheen began to feel a brief, troublesome pain alerting them to a harsh reality. The humans present watched on in silence, worried that something serious was happening.

"He's dead." one of the Slitheen present announced solemnly after the pain subsided.

"Jed Enisuoh El Bul Fashfar Star Slitheen is dead." Humeera confirmed the killing of yet another sibling before all. The Slitheen could uniquely sense one of their own dying. A mixed atmosphere of sadness and anger arose. Some Slitheen even engaged in public weeping, demonstrating their vulnerable sides.

"REVENGE!" Ezor cried out angrily, rallying his Family members. This was becoming far too common for any Slitheen's liking.

"Once is a tragedy, twice is a farce, thrice and above is just taking the piss!" Humeera snapped loudly, adding to the dissent. That was the seventh Slitheen victim murdered in this month alone.

"Calm down everybody…" the James Slitheen tried to restore immediate calm.

"CALM DOWN?! WE ARE BEING PICKED OFF ONE BY ONE! THIS IS HAPPENING ALL UNDER YOUR WATCH, JAMES!" a valued audience member screamed out, highlighting the Torchwood leader's inadequacies openly without fear.

"THE FAR RIGHT BASTARDS ARE TO BLAME. THEY KNOW ABOUT US SOMEHOW!" a Slitheen lady exclaimed dramatically. Murmurs of agreement could be heard in response to that claim.

"DON'T FORGET TO MENTION THAT ELITIST FAMILY WHO CLAIM TO REPRESENT THE NATIVES OF THIS ISLAND!" another Slitheen shouted. He was alluding to the exclusive and super wealthy British Royal Family. The Star Slitheen had been discussing behind closed doors how to infiltrate and subvert that monarchy to serve their own agenda. There were troubling rumours linking that family to other unsavoury homo sapien groups on the British Isles.

"I welcome your criticisms, kind brother. I do not shy away from them either. I know it's sad to feel another one of our own passing away so soon. But until we know who exactly is behind all of this, we will have to be patient. Take the losses as we unravel the mystery. Yes, we agree that the homo sapiens that make up the racist phenomenon that is the 'Far Right' in this part of the world are involved, somehow. The extent to which is yet to be determined accurately. Same goes for that human monarchy."

"You need to continue your jobs as government inspectors. Build up your intelligence pictures. Procure us the best homo sapien talent. Remember what Saba has instructed us: no killing of anyone unless it fulfils a mission criteria or is made in self-defence. We must maintain discipline in such difficult moments. Trust the process, guys. Our mighty and ignoble Family will prevail inevitably. Failure is the mother of success, after all." the Slitheen Taylor finished her speech notes, hoping to boost morale.

"Once we secure a major breakthrough, we will exact our revenge against our foes mercilessly!" the James Slitheen promised his brethren, clicking his claws.

"We better!" shouted out some of the Slitheen in unison. Everybody appeared to be on the same page.

"That is all. You can go.". After the emergency meeting concluded, the Slitheen returned to their normal functions. Ezor and Humeera purposely took their intrigued human counterparts over to a laboratory setting elsewhere in the building. There were rows of pod chambers on either side with various scientists and technicians present.

"How long will Saba tolerate these constant failures? Those amateur members of our Family are clearly not up to the task!" Humeera privately complained to her husband.

"Oh, if I were James or Taylor, I would freak out once Husna gets involved. Like me, she does not take Slitheen murders kindly. In fact, I think she should take over Torchwood. At least until this fiasco is sorted out." Ezor opined, approving Sergeant Husna Rashid Slitheen's brutal yet highly effective methods of obtaining results.

"Erm, what are we going to do now?" Henry asked, reminding the Slitheen that the humans were still present with them.

"Human children, now might be the best time to tell you - your former boss, the Deputy Minister Callum Chambers is partially responsible for at least three of the murders of our kin. Two of them were women, tragically." the Slitheen man revealed, cleverly manipulating the emotions of the non-Slitheen. They innately sympathised with the Family's problems.

"You always wondered why he was nasty to you? Because he treats all lifeforms he deems 'alien' with contempt. That included you two. He prefers the view from the top." Humeera added.

"He is not an alien, is he?" Adi asked, seeking to understand if this explained his harsh behaviour to anyone external to his being.

"No, not exactly. A disgusting excuse of a homo sapien, sure. Our intelligence efforts in your Ministry have been intercepting his phone calls. They have often taken place several minutes prior to each recorded murder. That piss ant is guilty as charged.". The Slitheen woman passed judgement swiftly, certain in her rulings. Whilst the humans underwent conversion, they had been busy analysing the data and deliberating over next steps.

"So what are you going to do?"

"We, Abi. We are going to exact our revenge. I am not waiting for James or Taylor to give me the green light. No, this one will be conducted off the books." Ezor announced, licking his lips. His wife laughed a little at the same thought. They were co-conspirators.

"Will you help our Family track down the killers? Enact justice? Save other homo sapiens from having to suffer the nastiness of that vile individual who is collaborating with unknown, malicious forces?" Humeera pressed home the rhetorical questions, creating the conditions in which the humans could only reply to them with affirmation.

"Yes." Henry replied without thought. It seemed the right thing to do.

"Err, sure." Adi could not see how she could say no.

"Excellent. We will take your affirmations as consent."

"Consent?"

"Welcome to the Family, guys. This is why we chose you two ahead of everyone else. Your first step is to change your biology and renounce your current mode of existence. Enter the pods.". With some hesitation, the homo sapien male and female walked forth into their respective conversion units. Without warning, a cocoon formed around them rapidly, rendering them unconscious within minutes. It would act as the womb whilst they changed forms radically. The Slitheen couple laughed together at their latest acquisitions that would assist their Family.

(The Next Day)

Abi and Henry sprung out of the pods high into the air briefly before gravity forced them to come crashing back down the floor. They helped one another to their feet, knowing that they had transformed into Slitheen irreversibly.

"Oh, yes!" Henry was thrilled by the change, enjoying his increased height, his augmented nostril power as well as his gifted razor sharp claws confirming his novel predatory credentials.

"It's wonderful…magnificent." Adi reviewed her change positively too. It felt like a step up. She felt empowered, utterly dominant in the new phase of her material existence. Nobody would ever be able to boss her again. Especially a non-Slitheen.

"We look the same." Henry observed as he stared into the mirror of Adi. Both were 'naked' but neither felt ashamed of their natural form. There was not much to differentiate them physically anymore although they maintained their individual personalities, leftovers from their time spent as homo sapiens.

"We are the same." Adi corrected as she examined her counterpart's green body. They were freed from their human biological restraints, no longer bound to any civilisation. To any sedentary joblife that only promised them a miserable paycheck.

"Yes… We are no longer humans.". The new reality dawned upon the musing male. The price of conversion. He could never go back. This was not something he had prepared for.

"Good riddance. We are Slitheen now. I quite like the change" Abi was glad. Her change had relieved her of the vast burdens her human condition imposed on her. She felt free at long last. At that moment, the Slitheen couple most responsible for their transformation reappeared together, delighted with the outcome that was never in any doubt.

"Welcome to the Family! You are Abi Abiola El Bul Fashfar Star Slitheen and Henry Talbot El Bul Fashfar Star Slitheen respectively. We can change your forenames to something more appropriate at a later date. I will also procure your customary skin suits as well but later - we have pressing business to attend to.". The greeting made the latest additions to the Family feel right at home. They had found a new purpose, a new line of work. Adi and Henry instinctively saw themselves as cooperting 'siblings'. Equals.

"We picked up a phone call transmission from Callum Chambers prior to the latest murder. Justice needs to be meted out. I am itching to get my claws on him… Abi, Henry - get ready for a hunt!". Ezor announced excitedly, clicking his claws as if to encourage the new Slitheen converts to join in the rising bloodlust. Revenge beckoned.

"Ah Ah! I think it's best if the adults deal with this particular issue. We cannot risk losing more of the Family, especially the young ones." Humeera advised wisely. She could not bear the thought of the newcomers being sent to their deaths prematurely.

"Yes, you are right." her husband conceded. He would have to take on this unauthorised mission himself.

"You two will stay here and observe my mission on screen.". The converts were too raw for the moment. They would have to sit this occasion out but the opportunity to learn remained. They would be spectating.

"Don't forget your disguise." Humeera tossed the skin suit of Chief Inspector Jacob Maxwell at her partner. He failed to catch it initially.

"Thanks, babe.". The Slitheen man pulled it up from his green feet, progressively compressing his humongous self inside.

"It's the neck brace that we wear that allows this activity of ours, guys. We'll get you some later." Humeera stated, clarifying that mystery at last for the neophytes. Once fully zipped up, Ezor bid his Family members a temporary adieu and headed straight for the teleportation bays on another floor.

(An Hour Later)

Chief Inspector Jacob Maxwell returned the Offices for the Ministry in the nick of time. Deputy Minister Callum Chambers was on the verge of leaving his office at the end of another day's shift. Knocking politely but entering without invitation anyways, Ezor noticed that his prey was finishing off another phone call. A hanging portrait on the wall had been bugged by the Family with a technological surveillance device a while ago. Over at Torchwood, Ezor's wife and the new converts watched every moment of this encounter on a monitor screen.

"You again?" the bossy man stated in utter disbelief. He watched the Inspector close the door carefully and walk up to his wooden-oak desk which he stood behind.

"Hello again, Deputy Minister Chambers. I need to talk to you about a serious matter." the Inspector actor began speaking.

"Cut the bullshit!" the nasty boss instantly barked at his interlocutor. It seemed very aggressive. Intentionally aggressive. His pale face lit up red hot like a tomato.

"Excuse me?" the disguised person pretended to take offence, perfectly imitating British civilised norms of defensive apologetics. Ezor surmised that the human had been made aware of his visitation in advance by somebody else.

"I know who you are. Who you really are." Callum declared without fear. He had been tipped off by the unknown forces that he was collaborating with: the Star Slitheen had found out about his involvement in the recent spate of Slitheen murders. They were on their way to kill him.

"Enlighten me. I haven't the faintest idea what you are talking about, Deputy Minister." Ezor maintained his civilised comportment for the moment.

"You are not a human. You belong to that filthy race known as the Slitheen.". The intelligent human revealed his basic, if incorrect, knowledge of these Raxicoricofalipatorians. Ezor's masquerading act had been exposed at last.

"How do you know about us?" the Slitheen inhabiting Jacob Maxwell did not deny the truth but instead opened a line of enquiry, ignoring the faulty description of his Family as being a 'race'. Too many humans made this common mistake repeatedly which said a lot about them. He wanted to tease out as much information as possible.

"Oh, we know everything about your kind. Your infiltration of UNIT, Torchwood, my government, my country and every other silly illegal operation you are conducting on my planet. On my planet. Converting my species into your wretched kind - eurgh!" the human shuddered hard at that point, deliberately airing his steep annoyance at 'alien' activity occurring all around him. He hated 'aliens' with a passion and worked day and night to have them annihilated. The converts to Slitheenhood had forfeited their humanity, their rights to be treated as humans. They too had to be killed off in puritan fashion.

"You are a primitive homo sapien. This intelligence is beyond the capabilities of your tiny, undeveloped mind. Who do you work for?" the Slitheen correctly judged that the Deputy Minister was really working for another force which would explain how he had all of this insider knowledge of the Family's business on Earth. But who were they?

"Not used to being on the backfoot, eh? It suits your ugly, retarded kind very well." the homo sapien continued with his aggressive, discriminatory remarks, trading barbs, taking care not to reveal who his collaborators were.

"Who do you work for? Answer me!" the Slitheen predator bellowed at the person before him who he deemed utterly non-respectable in every respect. His arrogance needed to be punished.

"Fortunately, I work with other foreigners, non-humans on a pragmatic basis. We have no affinity for one another but we share a common interest: the absolute annihilation of your race. God willingly, this will happen soon. The less of your kind in the universe, the better." Callum claimed with an inflated aura of superiority. He saw this confrontation as nothing more than an existential struggle between rival species. Humankind had to win at all costs. The Slitheen had to be rendered extinct, in his fascistic perception.

"The Slitheen can never be erased. If one of us falls, ten others will rise up!" Ezor retorted in defiance. But the human had not yet revealed who he was working for. The Star Slitheen had made many enemies over time. In the absence of concrete evidence, it was impossible to ascertain who was their main enemy. The Slitheen only learned that whoever these higher powers were, they were manipulating the primitive natives of Earth to do their bidding. Callum Chambers was simply an expendable pawn on the grand chessboard.

"Hah! Your accursed race of biped mutant cockroaches are a cowardly bunch of pussies, hiding inside our skins, the skins of my people - disgusting! Cowards! You are all the same to me - nothing more than an accidental byproduct of an evolutionary trajectory gone wrong, a bunch of thuggish killer aliens who need to be put down. Wiped clean from the face of the universe." the unhinged Deputy Minister decried the presence of the 'alien' Slitheen on his home planet, on his country's soil. By this point, he was intentionally advocating a wholesale genocide of the Slitheen without shame.

"Slitheen is not a 'race', you idiot. It's our surname. Meh, I don't regret leaving your arrogant kind behind one jot!... Fuck this, it's time to teach you a firm lesson, boy.". Before Ezor could reach for his hidden zip, Callum punched him hard in the face, preventing the Slitheen from getting out. He fell over onto the floor unexpectedly.

"Hahahaha! You are pathetic and weak if you cannot get out of your costume, Slitheen scum." the Deputy Minister boasted arrogantly. Surprisingly, he did not demonstrate any fear in this confrontation with the physically superior predator. Quite the opposite. He seemed to be enjoying the occasion. Few humans if any at all behaved like this before a Slitheen.

"You really think you can take me on, human?" Ezor laughed at that notion. Even if he remained stuck inside his disguise, Callum was no match for a Raxicoricofalipatorian who boasted superior physical strength, naked or disguised.

"With a bit of assistance, yes. I am going to enjoy killing you. Like all the other Slitheen scum we have wiped away this month alone. It is high time we unleash our counter-attack and take back control of our planet" Callum emphasised ominously, cackling a little as he admitted his criminal complicity before he lifted up a glass vial containing some transparent liquid off his desk. Pouring the extra-terrestrial contents down his throat, the homo sapien instantly gained super strength powers, enabling him to take on the Slitheen predator as an equal. He speared the surprised Ezor onto the floor and began to grapple aggressively with his would-be killer. The duo struggled immensely, the combat that took place equally all over the office captured vividly live on the screen monitor. Humeera observed with some intrigue, whilst Adi and Henry worried about the outcome.

"He's too strong for Ezor!" Henry exclaimed anxiously as he watched his fellow Slitheen have his human head smashed brutally with an office chair. The Deputy Minister appeared to have the upper hand.

"Oh, we should not underestimate my warrior husband. Patience." the spectating wife remarked, knowing his true capabilities. The combatants eventually barged against a bookshelf, causing thick publications to fall on them. Unusually, the empowered homo sapien appeared to have the upper hand against the Raxicoricofalipatorian who failed to unzip on this occasion.

"HAHAHAHA! Not so superior now, are you? Looks like you are going to join your wretched brothers and sisters in the afterlife shortly!... BURN IN HELL, ALIEN! DEATH TO YOUR RACE!" Callum screamed fanatically as he applied full pressure to his intended victim's throat, intending to seal his kill of the day. Left with no alternative, the Slitheen convert applied his best trump card.

"HOW MANY FUCKING TIMES?!... WE ARE…A FAMILY! I HAVE… HAD ENOUGH… OF YOU!" Ezor announced aggressively with some struggle in the short intervals of relief that he managed to breathe in between. The Slitheen widened his costume's jaws, enabling a massive tentacle to emerge and latch onto his surprised opponent's face, covering it whole. Immediately, it began to suck litres and litres of liquid juice rapidly out of his body, causing the helpless victim to lose his solid form. Whenever threatened, the Slitheen had evolved convenient biological mechanisms for purposes of self defence, to survive an extra day or two. Females could hiss poisonous breath or shoot out killer darts with precision. Males meanwhile produced deadly tentacles that viciously extracted the contents of an aggressive lifeform in front of them.

"Oh, this is going to be quite painful." Humeera declared, even wincing a little, as she watched on more intensely at the monitor screen. She had seen this occur before. Objectively, it was not a pretty sight.

"Aaaaargh!… Aaargh!…Ahhh…" the once-arrogant and powerful human screamed pathetically, progressively softening his sounds as his life force was literally sucked away in defeat. Back on board the spaceship, Humeera made sure that the new members of the Family watched every second of this highly educational live feed. This was the fate of anyone who foolishly dared to challenge the mighty and ignoble Star Slitheen Family. Abi and Henry understood in that moment how strong the Slitheen were. How strong they were potentially. They had yet to see themselves in action. Their thirst for action only grew from this point onwards. After a minute, the human aggressor's body steadily flopped to the floor in a dissolved state. His once-thick bones were gone, leaving only his rubbery skin behind in a highly rotting format. It was a gruesome ending for the criminal collaborator. The Slitheen convert had completely drained his victim dry, efficiently extracting all the surplus protein and nutritious content in liquid form.

"What happened?!" Adi exclaimed as the Slitheen spectators continued to fixate their black eyes onto the screen.

"The fascist Deputy Minister, as we like to say Adi, got 'slurped'." Humeera explained, using colloquial word-codes only the Family truly understood amongst themselves. She licked her own lips, playfully mimicking her spouse's tongue movements on screen as if participating in the same kill.

"Buuuuuurp!". The victorious Slitheen wiped his messy face clean with a human hand, laughing as he did so. He felt satiated for the time being. The genocidal homo sapien was destroyed ruthlessly.

"That's my husband!" Humeera approved the revenge kill enthusiastically, clapping her claws wildly. One less threat to their Family. Justice for the murder of her kin caused by this troublesome homo sapien. Torchwood could finally boast of being useful to the Family for once.

"Fucking gross… But that motherfucker totally deserved it!" The Adi Slitheen conceded. The tyranny of that homo sapien was no more, thanks to the timely intervention of the Star Slitheen.

"I can't say I'm displeased either. He brought it on himself, really. Honestly." The Henry Slitheen admitted openly. The Family had acted in self-defence, he rationalised to himself. The two converts deeply identified with their new Family by this point. They realised how high the stakes were against genocidal enemies hellbent on their extinction. They too were willing to lay down their lives for the Family that they had just joined formally.

"The Family are swift practitioners of rough justice. Nobody can beat the Star Slitheen Family! Rejoice in this victory." The Slitheen woman raised a lengthy forearm triumphantly to the ceiling, roaring in ecstasy at the final outcome. Adi and Henry instinctively copied her and joined in authentically, thoroughly enjoying their newfound Slitheenhood and forgetting about their prior humanity in the process. Back at the office, the Slitheen survivor gathered himself.

"Surprisingly delicious, for such an annoying prick. You saved me from having to hunt this afternoon." Ezor remarked cheekily, having escaped death narrowly. Picking up the rubbery, badly decayed skin of the recently made-deceased vile Callum Chambers, he tossed it nonchalantly into a nearby rubbish bin and covered the lid to hide evidence of the triumph. A fitting ending, he thought to himself. Walking back outside, he noticed that the busy department lacked a senior figurehead. The workers who were initially on the verge of returning to their homes heard the fight but were too scared of their boss to intervene or at least check out what was going on. None of them knew that their boss had been summarily disposed of by a superior Slitheen force.

"Attention everybody!" Ezor, still masquerading as Chief Inspector Jacob Maxwell raised his voice so nobody could make up the non-excuse that he could not be heard. His clothes were in a messy, tattered state, indicating that he had been involved in a physical struggle of sorts. Callum Chambers did not remerge and was nowhere to be found. Everybody listened attentively to what he had to say.

"Ahem. My name is Jacob Maxwell. Some of you may have seen me strolling around this place before. As the Chief Inspector for all government departments, I have decided to sack Deputy Minister Callum Chambers with immediate effect for dereliction of duty. You will never see his body around here again." the hidden Slitheen stated emphatically, telling a half-truth.

"Hooray!". Unsurprisingly, the other human subordinate workers in the Ministry were glad that their nasty boss was finally gone. Nobody cared about the finer details of his 'dismissal'. They celebrated wildly. A new era beckoned for their professional careers.

"Fortunately for you lot, if you fancy a change of career after all the crap you have had to put up with lately, there is a new job opening down the road at Canary Wharf, the home of Torchwood. We have a severe shortage of personnel at the moment - anybody interested in joining? I can promise you it will be a life-changing experience. Literally." the Slitheen promised confidently with a beaming smile coming onto his human face.

(The End).