A\N: I've done several stories these last two/three days, trying to clear my google docs and trying to complete the stories that I've left to rot. I want to get all my fandom stories completed before I start on my original stories seriously and I do that until all my fandom stories are completed or as completed as they're going to get.

This will be my second to last Willicia story for a while, I don't know how long it'll be, I don't know what's happening in this (all I know it's set in season 3 after their breakup) I just know that I need to get it finished because doing fandom stories just isn't enough for me anymore, but I think you'll enjoy this one, my darling Angels.

I hope you Angels enjoy this one.

TGWTGWTGWTGW

Only a handful of people were supposed to know, he wasn't, he couldn't know. It was her most kept secret: it was the reason she left Georgetown to spend Christmas break with her brother and mother two weeks early, the day she found out and broke up with the love of her life.

She remembers the breakup like it happened yesterday, not 17 years ago.

Flashback- 17 years ago:

She looks at the love of her life with tears rolling down her face. She's in pain, physical and emotional.

He looks at her, his own pain in his eyes. "Why?" Is all he asks. She looks down at what she's wearing- a tank underneath one of his hoodies, jeans and boots- so she can't see his face.

"I don't know." She answers, he scoffs and for a second the hurt is gone and replaced anger and disbelief. "'I don't know.' That's why you're ending this? Dear God, Alicia, I don't understand you. I thought we were good, gooder than good but obviously we weren't." He says. Alicia lifts her eyes and meets Will's furious gaze, the hurt and pain buried for the time being, the pain and hurt masked by the other emotions he's feeling.

She wants to tell him the real reason that she's breaking his heart, and hers, but the real reason will kill him. It's easier to lie to him and spare him the pain she's currently going through.

Her hand picks up the bag at her feet, swings it over her shoulder and grabs the handle of her suitcase that she'd packed when she arrived home.

"I'm sorry, Will, I really am." She whispers to him before she kisses his lips one final time, turns around, and walks out of the apartment, carrying the real reason for their breakup alone.

For a split second, she wants him to run after her and tell her that they'll figure it out together but he doesn't: he lets her leave. He lets her break his heart.

He lets her go.

She comes out of the flashback 17 years ago and feels the tears on her face as everyone looks at her in concern.

It's Diane, not Will, who asks her if she's okay, which isn't a surprise to her seeing as it's only been three weeks since she ended it between them in his office the day after Grace went missing and he's probably healing from having his heart broken by her a second time.

"Yes," she lies. "I'm fine." She says, wiping the tears from her face and pretending to be okay even though everyone knows she's not. She avoids Will's gaze which is easy seeing as he's focused on the client and not on her.

The deposition ends and Will hightails it out of the conference room and into his office. She watches him go until he's out of her eyesight.

Soon, it's just her, Diane and their client in the room. She feels for their client, a young mother of two who suffered a miscarriage.

"I don't know what to do Alicia." The client, Charlotte, says quietly. Alicia can see the same thing she saw in her own eyes 17 years ago: loss.

Alicia sighs and looks at the young mom. "I know what you're feeling, Charlotte."

Charlotte wipes her eyes. "Some days, I don't want to get out of bed, I want to hide until it all goes away, all the pain, all the numbness and all the guilt goes away." Alicia nods: she'd felt that way 17 years ago.

"I know exactly what you're feeling, Charlotte. I know what it's like to not want to get out of bed. I know what it's like to want to let the emotions take over, I know what it's like to want to give up, but you can't give up, Charlotte. You need to get up out of bed for your kids, you need to give them cuddles and tell then you love them and on bad days tell them that 'Mommy's not feeling very well but Mommy will be fine after some cuddles' It's okay not to be okay, as long as you don't push everyone away. You get through it for your kids and your family. Someone I knew told me years ago 'the people who care about you will always stand by your side.' And it's true, the people who care about you will always stand by your side, so let them be there for you when you need them to be there." Alicia tells Charlotte, wrapping her arms around herself, trying so hard not to let the tears fall down her face as Charlotte looks at her with a smile.

"How did you get through it, Alicia?" Charlotte asks, Alicia shakes her head. "You don't want to know and besides it was a long time ago." She answers as she pulls a card out of her folder and hands it to the client.

"If you ever want to talk about it, feel free to call me anytime." Alicia says as she gets to her feet and leaves the conference room, and walks to her own office, and lets the tears fall for the baby she lost 17 years earlier.

TGWTGWTGWTGW

A\N: I have decided to make this into a short story because it's too important to make it into a oneshot. I have at least three more stories that I'm also working on so the updates on this might be slow.

I hope you enjoy this first chapter, Angels.