A\N: This is the last chapter of A day full of heartbreak! I hope you Angels have enjoyed this story. This chapter will be the HEA ending where they end up together. The first half of this story will be the exact same as the angst ending but it will be entirely different, this chapter might be a little bit shorter than chapter 5.
I hope you Angels enjoy!
Alicia drives home with tears falling down her face. She can't believe everything that Will has revealed to her tonight. She has so many questions but no answers and she doubts Will'll answer them and if she's being honest with herself, she doesn't want to speak with Will for a while. She doesn't want to speak to anyone from Lockhart/Gardner for a while.
She doesn't know what she's going to do tomorrow when she goes to work. She doesn't want to face Will, not after tonight. Not after she found out that her family called Will to ask why she was so wasted, not when she learned that he stayed outside her bedroom for two days. She doesn't know if him knowing that she was pregnant and miscarried will change the way they work together.
Alicia enters her apartment, utterly exhausted from the dinner, no it wasn't even dinner, it was coffee and beer, and leans against the door. She closes her eyes and tries to block out the memories of seeing the two lines on the little stick, confirming what she felt, hearing her- their-baby's heartbeat for the first and last time, looking at the only sonogram pictures she had, seeing the nurse's face when she was told that she had lost baby, the way her mother held her in her arms as she sobbed and sobbed for the loss of the love of her life and their baby that she had ripped away from in one day. The memories she had buried or at least concealed behind Zach and Grace were coming back out, unable to remain hidden anymore.
She opens her eyes and walks into her bedroom, the sounds of her boots clicking over the hardwood floor the only sounds in the whole apartment, going into her closet and digging around in it until she finds what she's looking for: the box. The box she hasn't looked at in 16 years.
She goes to blow the dust off the top of the lid, removes it and sinks down to the floor with the box in her hands but something stops her: she needs to do this with Will, it was his baby too, a baby he didn't know about until today. She gets to her feet, picks up the box, leaves her room, picks up her purse and leaves the apartment again, going to her car. She needs to do this with Will because he deserves to see everything in the box.
Shifting the box underneath her arm, she knocks on Will's apartment door, silently hoping he's alone and with anyone.
The door swings open to reveal Will, a look of shock crosses his face before he recovers.
"Alicia, what are you doing here?" He asks, she licks her lips, unable to take her eyes off of him.
"Can I come in? I've got something to show you?" She replies, holding up the box for him to see, he nods silently and opens the door wider, stepping aside for her to enter. She enters his apartment and she's instantly transported back to the last time she was here: it was two days before she ended it. She remembers the morning she woke up, the last day she had been there, and running away from him while he chased her.
Flashback- 3 weeks and four days ago:
She was awakened by a kiss being placed on her lips softly. Her eyes flutter open and she's staring into the eyes of Will who is leaning over her.
"Morning, Leesh." He says. She sits up in his bed, covering herself with the sheet. Will holds two cups of coffee in each hand. He hands her one cup and sits down at her feet, staring at her over his cup. She notices that he's dressed in jeans and a t-shirt with his feet bare.
"Why are you dressed? I thought we agreed to have a day in bed?" She asks with a pout, Will chuckles. "We are, I promise, but I was out of sugar and your creamer, so I went out and got it, along with bagels." He says, Alicia smiles at him: he's always been so considerate. "Well, should we eat breakfast before we spend the entire day in bed?" She places the coffee cup on the night stand, Will places his next to hers before capturing her lips in a soft kiss before Alicia pulls away with a smirk, climbing out of bed with the sheet covering her body. She walks to the door, looking seductively at him over her shoulder.
"Catch me, Gardner." She says before running out of the room, hearing Will's footsteps behind.
"Get back here, Leesh!" Will calls as he chases her, Alicia laughs.
Pretty soon, Will's apartment is filled with laughter, heaving breathing, soft gasps of breath, the smells of coffee and bagels and Alicia being fed a bagel by her lover.
It's a morning neither of them want to end.
Alicia comes out of the flashback by Will calling her name. She startles and looks at Will. "Sorry, I was reliving something." She says, Will only nods, not asking her what she was reliving, and gestures for her to sit on the couch. She closes her eyes and fights the urge to slip back into the memories of the two of them spending several nights curled up on this couch on the rare nights that Peter kept the kids more than the usual agreement of 2 nights. She so desperately wants to slip into her memories and relive each of them but she knows she has to show Will the box before she allows her mind to take her back.
She puts the box on the ground in front of her feet as Will comes back with two cups of coffee. She takes the coffee from him with a small smile and brings the cup up to her lips, taking a small sip of the beverage. Her tongue burns but she doesn't care. Placing the cup on his coffee table, she turns to Will, a look of nervousness on her face as she begins to talk.
"I should have told you about the pregnancy, I know that. I know that I should have told you about the miscarriage, it was the one time I needed you the most but instead I had broken your heart because I thought I was protecting you from the pain I was going through, but all I was doing was letting the pain consume me. I had thoughts of telling you when I got home from Christmas break but I couldn't. I had spent two weeks drunk off my ass and it still hurt whenever I thought about our baby, it was destroying me from the inside out so in telling you that I was pregnant and then lost the baby, I couldn't watch you become destroyed, I couldn't do that to you, I couldn't watch as the knowledge of our lost baby destroyed the most important man in my life. So I kept it to myself and I let it destroy me without letting anyone help me. I pushed everyone away and I didn't want you to go through that, so I kept it from you for 17 years. I kept it to myself when all I ever wanted was for you to be with me, to hold me and tell me that it'll be okay someday, I robbed you of a chance to hear your baby's heartbeat and I'm so sorry, Will. I'm so, so sorry!" Tears are flowing down her face in a way that haven't happened since she broke up with him in his apartment.
In a second, all the anger and betrayal has left Will's body and he's pulling her into his chest, wrapping her in his arms. He kisses her hair as sobs tremble through her small frame. Will holds her silently, waiting for her sobs to slow.
This is what she should have done 17 years ago.
He can feel her body trembling with the force of her sobs, sobs she's most likely repressed for years. He kisses the top of her head and rests his cheek on top of her brunette hair, getting a whiff of the shampoo she uses, the same shampoo he has in his bathroom.
He doesn't know what to say: what can he say to everything she's just told him? He's not denying the fact that he knew something was seriously wrong with her the day she ended it in his apartment, he knew there was more than what she what telling him, he just doesn't know the extent of it until he received a call from Veronica a few hours after she left his apartment with her suitcase trailing behind her. He was surprised at her request, so much so he was silent for several minutes before making up his mind. He didn't regret going to Chicago and staying outside her bedroom door for 2 days, he'll never regret that, but he does regret that he didn't try harder when he was there.
Will sighs into Alicia's hair as her tears soak the front of his t-shirt. "I should have told you about the baby." Come her thick voice from his chest, he only hums into her hair. "Yeah, you should have but it's too late, but you can show me what's in the box you brought with you." He pulls away from her and nods his head at the box at her feet. He has a sneaking suspicion of what is in the box: it's Alicia after all, the woman who never throws anything away. He's willing to bet that she still has all of his t-shirts and hoodies she never gave him back.
Alicia reluctantly pulls away from him and picks up the box, handing it to him. "You should have this now, I've had it for 17 years, it's your turn to have it." She says quietly as he stares at the box in his lap. Alicia places a hand on his shoulder as he removes the lid and looks inside.
What he sees makes his eyes well up with tears:
A pregnancy test.
A sonogram.
A onesie that says Daddy's little lawyer.
A heart shaped necklace
A pair of baby shoes.
It's proof that Alicia had planned to tell him about their baby but had lost it before she had chance to.
"Open the necklace." Alicia says, her voice is a tiny whisper in the silent apartment. He reaches in and takes out the necklace. He opens it slowly and smiles faintly at what the pictures are inside the necklace.
On one side of the heart shaped necklace is a photo of them and then on the other side is a photo of the sonogram.
"I had three copies of the sonogram and had one of them fitted into the necklace then found one of us and also had fitted in, like a family." She says quietly. He puts the necklace back in the box and places the box on the floor and looks at her, he grabs her hand from his shoulder and holds it.
They sit in silence for a few minutes, the only movement is Alicia unzipping her boots, throwing them near the coffee table and curling her feet underneath her.
"I will always regret that I robbed you of knowing we were going to be parents." Her voice is a little hoarse but he can hear her perfectly. He's always been able to hear her, even in the loudest of stadiums.
"You've already taken the few first steps, Alicia. Showing me this is just the first step of many." He replies.
Her perfume is overwhelming his senses and he wants to ask her to move away from him, but he can't and he doesn't. He doesn't want her to leave his arms, not yet.
"Will?" She asks after a few more minutes of silence, he looks down at her and their eyes meet.
"Yeah?" He responds.
Alicia doesn't say anything but she does lean towards him, he knows what she's about to do: he needs to stop her, he knows that, but he doesn't, he wants this to happen maybe more than she does.
Their lips are pressed together in a soft kiss. She deepens the kiss and he lets her deepen it, her lips taste of cherries, coffee and something she's never told him. She's always tasted like this, even in Georgetown. He's the one who ends the kiss, not saying anything as they just stare at each other. Suddenly, Alicia straightens up, grabs her boots, puts them on her feet, zips them back up and gets off the couch. "I should go. I'm sorry to disrupt your night. You'll have my resignation on your desk in the morning then you'll probably never see me again. I shouldn't have even met you. It would've saved us a lot of pain and suffering." Will stands up with her. She's rambling, he notices. She only rambles when she's scared. And right now she's petrified and he doesn't know what of. Of just kissed him? Of what she just showed him the box that contained the things she was going to use to tell him she was pregnant 17 years ago? He doesn't know.
"Alicia," he says, she ignores him and walks to the door, breathing heavily.
"I kissed you, I kissed you and I shouldn't have." She's saying.
"Alicia." He tries again, desperation colouring his voice. She still ignores him, she's getting closer to the door now, closer to walking out on him for a second- no for a third- time.
He let her go both those times, he'll be damned if he does it for a third time.
"Leesh!" He shouts, finally gaining her attention, just as she reaches for the door handle. She turns around, her hand still outstretched to take the handle and open the door at a minute's notice, her eyes wide as she looks at him with that cute Bambi look, as he dubbed it in college.
"What are you talking about? You're not resigning, no way in hell, I won't let you, not over tonight." He won't let her resign, and he doubts that Diane will either, not over their personal business that doesn't affect the firm or their work.
"Why not? I'm an adult, I can do what I want." She says petulantly. He allows a small smirk to crawl onto his lips before it goes away and is replaced by a frown.
"Alicia, I will rip up all and any resignation letters you place on my or Diane's desk right in front of you if I have to. You are not resigning!" He says firmly. Alicia sighs in defeat and he lets the small smile back on his face.
"Leesh, talk to me. What's going on?" He asks, Alicia sighs.
"I've ruined everything between us!" She exclaims, throwing her hands up. He shakes his head: she's not ruined anything.
"You've not ruined anything, Leesh." He contradicts her. He walks up to her, stopping a few feet in front of her. Alicia scoffs. "Don't lie to me, Will. I know I've ruined everything between us. I ruined it the second I didn't tell you about the baby, hell I ruined everything between us three weeks ago in your office." She says with a scoff. Will rolls his eyes. He's already getting sick of her using their lost baby as an excuse.
"God damn it, Leesh." He swears before advancing towards her, making her walk backwards into the door. A small thump as her back hits the door echoes through them but he doesn't ask if she's okay as his lips cover hers in a rough kiss, her arms wrap around his neck, kissing him back deeply. She moans into his mouth as his hands travel down to cup her ass.
Alicia pulls away this time and unzips her boots again and throws them over his shoulder before kissing him again. Will lifts her up and she wraps her legs around his hips, she threads her fingers in his hair as she carries her to his room. He chuckles into Alicia's mouth when she takes off his t-shirt.
Will lays her down on the bed they spent so much time in and starts undressing her while kissing her down her throat, her moans filling the room like sweet music.
After two rounds of love making, Alicia has her hair tied in a ponytail with one of the hair bobbles she has in Will's bathroom and now is laying underneath the sheets with her head pillowed on Will's chest, who is drawing patterns on her bare shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Will." She says once again. She hears Will sigh as he stills his fingers. "Leesh, you don't have to keep apologising to me. It's done, it's over. We can't change the past but we can change the future." he says softly. It's her time to sigh. "I'll be sorry for what I did to you." She replies. The hand that had been around her waist, lifts her chin up to look up into his eyes.
"It's like I told you 'the people who care about you will always stand by your side' and that's where I'll be, standing by your side, forever. We're okay, we'll be okay, and as long as you've got me by your side, you'll be okay." He finishes his sentence with a soft kiss to her lips. She smiles into the kiss before laying her head back on his chest and falling asleep wrapped in his arms once again, and hopefully for the rest of time.
The two rings that lay on her finger for the last 16 years given to her by the wrong man were thrown across the room, sat underneath the window, the moonlight glittering the small diamond, filling the room with silver light.
A year later:
Alicia signs the last page of the divorce papers with a small smile and hands it to her divorce lawyer, David Lee. He takes the papers from her hand with a large smile. Out of all of Lockhart/Gardner only Will, Diane, Cary who they'd hired back at Alicia's insistence, Kalinda, Julius, David and a few other friends she's made including Eli Gold, agree with her divorce from Peter and approve of her relationship with Will. And only Diane, Cary, Kalinda, David and Eli know about the miscarriage she had in college and somehow it hasn't been leaked to the press or to her now ex-husband.
"Thank you, Alicia. Now go, get out of here, go see Will." Her lawyer and friend says with a smile. She gives him a grateful nod and leaves his office, practically running to the conference room where she sees the love of her life with Diane, Cary, Kalinda and Julius with Eli.
Will stands up when she enters. "Well?" It's Diane, one of Alicia's best friends and confidants. Alicia smiles wider if it's even possible.
"I'm free!" She squeals like a little girl, or better yet like Grace when she found out about Will. Will laughs and pulls her into a deep kiss. The rest of them cheer, something that makes her laugh as she pulls away from Will and hugs her friends.
It's not been an easy year for Alicia, nor for Will, with Alicia demanding Peter for a divorce when it was revealed that he slept with another one of her best friends while she was pregnant with Grace, something that literally made her throw up in Diane's private bathroom in the office. Zach and Grace had gone completely berserk and begged their mother to divorce their father and marry Will, something that earned a chuckle from all the adults who were in the room, apart from Peter.
Alicia took a long time to recover from the shock of Peter sleeping with yet another one of her best friends, but this time it took her longer to recover from because the 'affair' took place when Alicia was pregnant and if it weren't for Will, Zach, Grace, Diane, Cary, Kalinda, Julius, David, Eli and Will's sisters, she would still be locked in her and Will's bedroom instead of hugging her friends who helped her out of her depression.
After Cary has released her from his hug, she goes and sits in Will's lap and rests her head on his shoulder. "You okay, Leesh?" Will asks her, she nods her head and lifts it to stare into his eyes before kissing him deeply.
"Thank you for always being by my side, even when I didn't want you there." she whispers, even though everyone can hear her. Will's lips turn into a smile.
"I've always told you, Leesh, I'll always be by your side and that's never going to change." The love of her life says she doesn't know what to say so she stays silent, content to be silent in his arms.
1 month later:
Will Gardner twirls his stepdaughter around on the dance floor as he watches his wife dance with her son.
His wife looks breathtaking in the white dress she changed into for the reception. He nods at Zach over Grace's shoulder and both of them spin the women in their arms and Will easily catches his wife while Zach catches his little sister and twirls her around.
It's crazy to think that a few days ago they were lying in bed as a non-married couple and now they're husband and wife. He wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her closer to him.
"I love you, Mr Gardner." She says quietly, he kisses her softly. He loves hearing those words coming from her lips.
"I love you too, Mrs Gardner." He replies.
"Are you ready for this?" He asks, referring to living the rest of her life as his wife, as Mrs Alicia Gardner.
"I'm ready for anything as long as I have you at my side." She tells him as he dips her and kisses her in the middle of the dance floor.
Alicia Gardner watches her new husband lift his new daughter in the air with a large smile. After her divorce, Grace and Zach refused to have anything to do with their father and started referring to Will ads their father, which was a surprise to him but he's taken his new title as Dad very seriously and it makes her happy, that after 18 years, Will finally has children of his own, though not by blood.
William Paul Gardner, she thinks while watching Will placing their daughter back onto her feet and holding her close before she runs off to dance one last dance with her brother before they leave their parents to stay with Sara, Aubrey and their new cousins while Will and Alicia are on their two week honeymoon, is my husband, my light in the dark, my fiercest protector, my biggest cheerleader, my best friend, my partner in law and life, my biggest supporter in everything I do, my worst enemy at times, my everything.
She'd always regret not telling him about the pregnancy 18 years ago, but right now, they're tight where they're supposed to be:
Always at each other's sides, cheering each other on, holding each other in the darkness, husband and wife.
Yes, Alicia thinks, watching her husband walking towards her, his arms for her to go into, we're exactly where we're meant to be, now and forever.
She buries her face into her husband's shoulder as the words he spoke to her in the darkness of his bedroom a year ago echo through her head, as they once did when he first told her them when they were fresh college students: 'the people who care about you will always stand by your side' and that's where I'll be, standing by your side, forever.'
And he has: he's always been at her side, and he always be at her side, and she'll be at his, forever. Because that's where the two of them belong.
At each other's sides.
"I'll love forever." She whispers in his ear.
"I'm okay with that." He whispers in her ear as he holds her in his arms.
A\N: My HEA ending for A day full of heartbreak is finally finished! It has taken me days to write because I didn't know where to stop. This ending is a little bit longer than the angst one for obvious reasons. I'm currently handwriting 4 new stories for different fandoms and I have a new oneshot series idea for the couple that we all love so much. I hope you have a good week, Angels.