May and Meg are still with me!
Thanks for reading!
After a cathartic cry, I fall asleep with my head leaning against the window, watching the miles pass by. I'm so tired after the long, fraught day that I hardly remember being woken and walking back to my room. So it's no wonder I wake with a start in the early morning hours before our light sphere ignites for the day.
For a blissful five seconds, the horrors of yesterday don't exist, but all too soon, they come rushing in, and I've never felt more alone. My entire existence has become dependent on my mate, and not knowing what's happened to him is devastating.
A barely there flutter sparks green, and as I cradle my stomach, I remind myself that, no, I'm not alone. I have my babies, Edward's cubs, and they must become my new mission.
I go to the nursery and turn on a lamp before selecting a book and settling into one of the cushioned rocking chairs. I read the tale of a young cub who gets lost in the woods, and each new sentence calms my mind.
When I'm halfway through my third book, there's a soft knock on the door. Assuming it's Rose, I call, "Come in."
When Queen Esme peeks around the corner, I jump to curtsey. "Don't be silly, Isabella," she says, motioning for me to retake my seat. "Would you like some company?"
"Of course." I'm surprised it's true and not just what I should say. "How long have you been back in the kingdom?"
"Only a few hours," she replies, settling in the other rocking chair. "I wanted to come see how you're handling things."
My chest feels like it's collapsing in on itself as I struggle to take a deep breath. "It's hard," I murmur, rubbing my stomach. "But I have to think of our babies. They're the most important thing to me right now."
"Of course." She stays quiet for a beat before rocking forward and catching my gaze. "I also wanted to thank you. Your connection with my son has given us a head start in the search for him. Edward has spoken of the strength of your bond, but Carlisle and I could never grasp that. Now we understand with perfect clarity, and so do the other settlements."
"It's such a part of me, of my life with Edward, that I forget every other couple doesn't have the luxury," I say softly, suddenly sad for her.
"Not even our parents were lucky enough to have the mating bond," she replies, lost to the past. "It started after the war. Maybe it was because we lost many young Cullenites in the fighting, or maybe it was something else entirely, but mated pairs became less common until they ceased to exist. The last couple died more than fifty years ago just days apart."
My heart clenches, and I take a shuddering breath. "That's heartbreaking."
"It was Carlisle's grandfather who decreed that Cullenites must continue to breed outside the mating bond," she says carefully. "Queen Platt was his mate, but she died young of a terrible disease, so out of duty, he made another match and continued to have cubs."
"He sounds like a brave man." I rock my chair, soothed by this in-depth history lesson. Edward has regaled me with tales of the war and his general disdain for humankind, but we've never discussed what happened to the mating connection. "I find it fascinating how the bond returned with another species."
She bobs her head, her chair joining mine in a soothing rocking motion. "King Carlisle gets all the credit for that. Where his father refused to listen to suggestions from our scientists, my husband embraced the idea and even chose his heir as the test subject."
"But it was only meant as a breeding program," I counter, remembering that ad Rose handed me what seems like a lifetime ago.
"Yes," she confirms, nodding. "You see, without the bond, couples were birthing fewer cubs, and it had gotten to the point where there were concerns about tainting our bloodline. That was what prompted Carlisle into action. There was hope that replenishing the Cullen race would bring back the mating bond, but no one, not even our scientists, expected it to happen with a human. And certainly not on the first attempt."
Even with all the sadness inside me, I chuckle as I remember that day like it was yesterday. "I was quite surprised as well."
She lets out a breathy laugh. "I can imagine, but dear, you handled it beautifully. You'll never know how frightened I was when he grabbed you up and sprinted from the room. I was confused, and an incident would've killed the program entirely."
This is new to me. "I had no idea."
"We sent guards," she says, her tail whipping with anxiety. "They had orders to detain him and return you unharmed."
My cheeks flush red with the memory of those first few minutes alone. "I take it they reported back that it wasn't necessary?"
She bursts into laughter. "We were assured that whatever had happened was consensual. Carlisle had paced a hole in the floor by the time Edward finally came to us."
I huff a deep breath, content to rehash that beautiful day. "I've always loved how you accepted me without question."
"I'd never deny my son his soulmate," she whispers, getting choked up for the first time. "We will get him back, Isabella."
"Please," I whisper, "call me Bella."
She reaches out her hand, and I take it. "I don't know how far behind we'd be if you hadn't insisted on investigating. I'll never be able to thank you enough, Bella."
"Were there any other clues?" My voice cracks.
"There were recent tire tracks from another larger vehicle and no tracks from Edward's scraper leaving the pit stop." She squeezes my hand tightly. "Carlisle has sent a messenger to the Supreme Council asking for urgent support. If they intend to help, we'll know something by nightfall tonight."
I nod, relieved there's a higher power in which to escalate this. "Please don't leave me out. Not knowing is the worst thing that could happen to me."
"You have my word," she says, standing and tugging me up so she can pull me into a tight embrace. "I promised Edward that I'd defend you with my life. You carry the future of the Cullen race."
A tear trails down my cheek as she releases me, and I wipe it away as I step back. But then, something extraordinary happens. That same intoxicating flash of light from before bombards me, and I drop to my knees under the weight of euphoria.
Queen Esme is at my side in an instant, holding me upright.
"It's Edward," I pant, barely able to breathe under the crushing cacophony of emotion. "He's alive."
Y'all should prob thank Mary for pressing me to post because I had, in fact, forgotten that today is Thursday. Sorry, sorry, sorry.
A couple of recs for you…
If you've been waiting for the complete button, NOW IS THE TIME… The Way I Wanted by iambeagle is finally complete. You'd better strap in for that ride, though, cause it's gonna break you, but it'll totally repair you after.
And this is a new-to-me author who is doing smth similar to my Blank Space by posting 100-word chapters. Only, canon is her theme. It's a redo of the phone call where Bella catches Jake telling E that Charlie's at a funeral… Payphone by hollenheist. Let her know I sent you :)
Monday, but let's all cross our fingers that we don't catch up to my written chapters!