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ROSE'S POV

"Stop, get off me,"

"Ahhh!"

"You fucking asshole,"

His moans, grunts, and curses.

I hugged my legs tighter as I recalled the memories. I can feel the pain spreading through my veins, my cells, and every part of mine. I can feel my body, and mind giving up to the darkness. I can hear my mind telling me, how ugly I am.

Yes, I did have sex after that, with Adrian, and it was amazing to know that sex is blissful. That it was something you can enjoy but the damage was already done.

My inner self still screams when someone touches me intimately. Even on the day I first met Dimitri. Hiding it is easy, but bearing it is hard. I thought that the pain has lessened but no! It's still there.

"Mind if I join you?" I looked up at the pair of chocolate brown eyes, which were looking at me.

"Why are you here?" I asked him looking back at my heels. I expected him to lie but he didn't.

"Because you're here," I closed my eyes and sighed.

"I don't want to see anyone," I told. I heard him sigh.

"As much as I want to give you the privacy you need, you promised me something sladost, I'm here to take it," (Sweetness) I frowned and looked up at him.

"I didn't promise you anything," I told him. And he smiled, and I sighed in annoyance.

"Look Dimitri, I want to be alone, so will..."

"Dance with me," I widened my eyes as he cut down my sentence.

"What?" I asked him.

He crouched down to my height kneeling, and at that moment impulsively I hugged myself tighter. He noticed this. But didn't tell anything and held out his hand.

"Do you trust me?"

The question is why? Why should I trust him? He wanted to sleep with me the first moment he saw me. He told that out loud in front of others. He still wants to, so why should I trust him in my most vulnerable state?

"I know you can't, not with what I've done. But please, Rosemarie Nicole Hathaway Mazur will you dance with me?" My eyes widened again as he pleaded. For this small time, I've known him, he never begged anyone.

Letting a deep breath out, I place my hand on his.

He got up making me stand too, and let go of my hand just to place his phone on the bench, some music playing.

"From the melody, not completely a slow dance is it?" I asked him and he nodded.

"I don't think I can do this Dimitri. I don't think I can let anyone touch me now. I ca..." I didn't get to finish explaining my panic mode to him.

Very gently he touched my chin making me look into his eyes.

"Trust me, just trust me," He told and I closed my eyes taking a deep breath and nodded.

"Let me erase them sladost," (sweetness) He told and I opened my eyes, tears filling them again.

"You can't," I whispered.

"Then let me disappear them, even for a short moment," He told looking into my eyes. And I nodded, wanting... no I needed that.

So we stood under the gazebo which is decorated for tonight's event still wearing the same clothes except he has taken his blazer off.

He slowly took my hand to his before gently dragging me closer and looked into my eyes again before taking my other hand and guiding it to his shoulder. I wrapped my arm around his neck and he held my right arm tightly yet gently close to his heart. His other hand slowly, very slowly wrapped around my back.

I closed my eyes flinching.

"Open your eyes, sladost, I'm not him. I will never hurt you,"(Sweetness) I opened my eyes to look into his brown ones, and just like that, I know that I'm safe. I nodded again.

We started swaying to the music. And as the music started to change, so does our movements.

"It's changing," I stated and he smirked.

"From what I've found, you love dancing, don't you? Why don't you lead it?" He asked and I chuckled.

"Fine," I told him, taking my hand off his shoulder and pulling away from him, and he pulled me back to him, and I came back spinning, and as I faced him again, my hair was over my face and his hand was placed on my back pulling me impossibly closer to him. My chest pressed to his.

His hand left mine only to trail down my arm. I closed my eyes tightly.

Two feelings were running inside me.

Horrible, scared, gross, pain...

Comforting, safe, astonishing, pleasure, desire...

Two feelings created by two different people.

NO

Dimitri's right, my pain he's making them disappear and igniting new feelings, making me crazy.

"Sladost," I heard his whisper. I opened my eyes again. He smiled and continued trailing his fingers until they are resting firmly on my lower back.

And then we started moving, dancing to the song, around the gazebo. At one point he twirled me and brought me back to the same place.

I was so lost in the feeling, I couldn't get enough. All my dark thoughts were leaving me.

As the music started going higher and higher so does our movements, we started moving quickly, and just when the climax hit, he picked me up and spun, making me chuckle.

When he placed me back on my feet I breathed heavily, still smiling but my eyes closed and my arms wrapped around his neck. His hands were wrapped tightly wrapped around my waist but he slowly loosened them, and I bent, arching my back.

And just like that, he brought me back to the same place at a lightning speed making me gasp and open my eyes. My left leg hiked up touching his this thigh, and his right hand wrapped around me tightly, while his left hand not leaving mine.

Again we started moving side to side, my leg slowly coming back to the floor. And very slowly he turned me around until my back is arched sideways, and his hand was on my belly. I tilted my neck closing my eyes, a sigh escaping me.

And when he turned me around completely I looked at him from the back and a quick smile passed between us before I pulled away from his hold and moved a couple of steps forward toward him, still holding his hands. And just like that, he pulled me back to him, my back completely touching his chest.

I closed my eyes tightly. The music was coming to an end. Both of us were breathing hard. His musky fragrance hit my nose, making me dizzy. His breath on my neck made me go wild more and more. I felt his hands on both my sides. But everything broke when I felt his fingers on my exposed thigh, tracing them upwards.

All my bad memories started coming to me and right then I wanted to get away from his hold. And he sensed it. Like he always did.

"Shhh, sladost! It's me, I won't hurt you," I started relaxing and his hands slowly traced upwards until they firmly rested on my stomach. I closed my eyes leaning back to his chest and resting my head on his shoulder. He slowly turned me around, making me look deep into his sweet chocolate ocean. His fingers connected with my cheek right under my eyes wiping the wetness away. I leaned onto his gentle touch.

"Don't ever think you're weak, sladost. You're so strong. So, so strong, and beautiful, that's why you're very special to me," He whispered holding both my cheeks in his large hands and pressing his forehead to mine.

"Thank you," I whispered. He kissed my forehead in the most tendered way anyone has ever done.

I don't know why I thanked him. Never in my life have I let anyone touch me when I'm in my most vulnerable space. Not even Adrian! But with Dimitri, I don't know why I let him take a chance to help me. His touch was gentle. So gentle.

When we danced, there were so many emotions, so many feelings. I've never felt this way. I felt safe, loved, and beautiful, in Adrian's arms too. But with Dimitri, there's so much more. Something I can't explain. And it drives me nuts, that I can't explain.

"You should go sladost, It's too late anyway," He told and I nodded. But before he could let me go, I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him. Burring myself to him.