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The lights got low. We set off dozens of paper lanterns into the night. Ruby laughed as they took off and floated upwards like a private and personalized constellation. Her unfiltered joy was a delight to taste. I could do little more than be taken along by the waves of sensation. A strong laugh during a long night with friends was what Ruby's aura felt like against mine.

I drank a shot with Weiss as we watched the lanterns fade into the night.

"Good wedding," I decided as I gasped off the alcohol. The guests were all gone and it was just the three of us with the lights low. I'd clean things up tomorrow but it was a small arrangement. It wouldn't take me long.

"Night's not even over yet," Weiss agreed. "But true enough. It was. Thank you, Cloud."

"What'd I do?"

"Well, you put aside your duties to the world for another day," Weiss pointed out. "So there's that."

"Its-"

"It's hard. It's hard what you're doing for me. For Ruby, too. You've come so far with the medication and putting up walls between yourself and your family. It's hard. I asked you for a lot and you gave it to me without flinching. You've built up this safety and security, I mean you built it up over an obsession. A negative. Like a refusal to lose. It's not all good down there. Is it? But you still did it. You did it for me."

I said nothing. I glanced at the ground.

"You're holding your aura back," she reminded. "Give it to me. I want you. I want you. Ruby wants you to always be letting your aura exposed and open. She's going to ask you when she works up the courage. It hurts her when you pull in on yourself and go dark. She misses you. She just hasn't asked you yet. I need to work on it too. I withdraw and hurt her. She's too empathic for it to not hurt her."

"I'll work on it. I… I don't imagine that you both will want to feel what I am feeling all the time."

"We hurt her when we do it. She wants it all the time. Even when we feel bad. It hurts her more to not know what we are feeling. She would rather share our pain than be lonely. She was crying about it. To me. Work on it that hard."

"Alright, I will."

"How was today in terms of your hallucinations?" She wondered. "I know that it's never a zero. It's always at a small number recently. How was today, though?"

"Two. Probably a one. " I murmured.

"What's it out of?" She asked.

"Ten, probably a twenty."

"In a good way or a bad way?"

"Ten being the worst they could be," I clarified. "A ten being I'm hearing my mother's voice and seeing shadows and feeling bugs. Lots of them. A ten is bad."

"But not today?"

"No, not today."

Ruby wandered over in her beautiful trumpet dress and sat down next to me. "What are you two chatting about?"

"You, a little. And me a little," I informed her.

"What about me?" Ruby wondered.

"You hate when I don't let my aura out."

"It sucks. It hurts so bad. Just share. Just let it out and share. With me," Ruby whined. "You bottle up and I can't feel you and I want to taste you. Even when you're hurting. Especially when you're hurting. Share with me."

"I'll try," I vowed.

"Now what about you? You said you were also talking about you." Ruby asked.

"His hallucinations. We were talking about how bad they were."

Red padded up to me and I scratched his head. He slowly laid down and I pursued and rubbed his belly.

"And?" Ruby pressed.

"They were low. Real low. But still there," Weiss granted.

"Should they be gone?"

"They should be manageable," I murmured. "That's what the drugs really do. Do they make the hallucinations go away or do they make me not care about them? Is there a difference? Just to get me to a level where I will engage. I am a tentacle."

"Of course there's a difference! Between not having hallucinations and not caring?!"

"Is there?" I asked.

"Weiss?" Ruby demanded.

"I hear him. He doesn't notice or they get better. And it may be hard to tell which is really happening because he has no good reference frame. Right?"

"Pretty much," I nodded.

"So? What does that mean? Should I be worried? You're bottled up right now!"

"I'm thinkin' about scary stuff!"

"I'll be fine feeling it with you!"

"'I'll be fine feeling it with you,' she said," I laughed. "I don't need you inside my head right now. I'm fine."

"Well I'm not! I miss you. Let it out. Please, for me?"

I sighed and relaxed my golden aura into the environment around me. Ruby visibly relaxed. Tight muscles in her arms and collar and back released their hold. "This isn't bad. What are you talking about? Why are you holding this back? You frustrate me so much sometimes. Let me be with you. I married you to be with you. I want to be with you all the time. All of the time. As much as I can. I want it."

I groaned and rubbed a hand up through my hair.

"How's your paranoid thinking and panic?" Weiss asked.

"Low. And it's not paranoid thinking. There's a goddess out to get me. And I'm trying not to think about it with a baby on the way. But I totally could drive myself mental about that."

"No negativity about our babies! None!" Ruby decreed. "They are our babies. You're pulling your aura back in!" She smacked me hard on the arm. "Stop it!"

"Okay, okay!" I raised my hands in surrender.

"So what will you do over the summer when school is out of session?" Weiss asked.

"Missions. And mayhem. Maybe a tournament. It won't really scratch the itch of killing a person but the Engelberts are in Mistral so if I'm going to crack them I need to take a flight over there at some point. That's probably a weekend."

"I don't like that," Ruby decided.

"I gotta lay down the law. They tried to blow me up. They got to die. Gots ta'."

"Do you have to talk about it like that?" Weiss protested lightly.

"A little," I answered.

"Why?" Weiss demanded.

"Uh, so you guys know? What you're married to. I am a tentacle."

"You're not a tentacle," Ruby admonished. "You resist Salem. You're not a part of her."

"Sometimes our edges blur. Have you ever looked around at the universe and wondered what the borders between life and death are? Have you ever felt yourself fade and become one with the world? It's like that."

"Did you ever use harder hallucinogens than THC?" Weiss wondered.

"No. Why?"

"Because it sounds like you did."

"Well, what about the one electron hypothesis?" I asked. "Everything is made out of the same thing. Just twisted through the fifth dimension. All the same particle. We're all one. Every Feynman diagram is the same Feynman diagram."

"Cloud I have no idea what you're talking about," Ruby sighed. "Weiss?"

"No idea," Weiss threw up one hand. "No clue."

"That isn't my fault. Particle annihilation looks like particle creation."

"Our physics classes at Beacon didn't cover this. I don't know where you're getting it from," Weiss drew out.

"Must be my father's programming," I sighed.

"Well stop it. Speak like a person," Ruby ordered.

"It's all the same single particle just twisted and bouncing really fast. Everything is made out of the same one object moving so fast it's going back in time. That's what makes the universe a fractal. The universe is the universe again smaller and inside of itself."

"Cloud… okay?" Ruby requested.

"Okay," I agreed. "The point is that I'm in this thing. And I'm not sure how strong the hold it has over me really is until the day I face my fate."

"Which we are so thankful, so thankful, that you put that off a little longer and did this with us. We are so grateful that you decided you wanted to marry us more than you wanted to confront your family. It means the world to us," Weiss whispered and set her hand on my shoulder. I tasted her when she did.

"Well you know…"

"And you put a baby in me. That's got to scare you. I know it does. But you're going to be a great father-"

"A fantastic father," Ruby agreed and cut in.

"Right? So good. But I know it scares you but I think it scares you in a healthy way.

"We will see how I cope. You both want to be pregnant at the same time. That's going to be crazy."

"Oh hush. You'll cope just fine. I'm sure we won't drive you too crazy," Ruby brushed her hair out of her face and I kissed her cheek. "What was that for?" She wondered.

"I wanted to. I wanted to do it so I did." I poured myself another shot. I slammed it back. "Why? You got complaints?"

"Not really," she returned. "I love how your aura feels. You rub it against me and it just feels so right. Am I crazy?"

"No," Weiss dismissed. "He has a good flavor and texture, but so do you, Ruby. Not like me."

"You're delicious. What are you talking about?" I demanded. "Seriously, what are you talking about?"

"Well… I mean… compared to Ruby and you I just thought…"

"You're so tasty. All creamy like some custard pudding," Ruby explained. "Cool but sweet."

"Crushed ice. Nice cool cold coffee. It's a treat. You're a treat Weiss. A snack. I'd eat you up and knock you up but you know."

"I already am. I didn't know I tasted good. I thought it was all you two. You can't really taste yourself," Weiss defended herself.

"You have a smooth low cool one. That's what you're like. It's a good one. A personal favorite."

"A favorite compared to what though?" Weiss wondered.

"Yang and Blake. Pyrrha. Ruby, Neo, and a few others. You know? I couldn't really pin down my absolute favorite. But yours is up there. It's definitely in the running."

"Which is better? Mine or Ruby's?" Weiss asked.

"Oh I don't know," I confessed. "I really couldn't say. You both do such different things for me. It's not much of a comparison. It doesn't make sense to compare the two of you. It doesn't do anything for me to do something like that. Which is better, Weiss, me or Ruby?"

"You taste better," Weiss informed me. "But Ruby is better looking."

"What do you mean?" Ruby wondered.

"The eyes and the hair. Yeah. I see it. No contest," I agreed.

"What do you mean?!" Ruby demanded.

"Ruby, you're so hot. So, so hot." Weiss murmured. "But Cloud tastes better than you do."

"'cause I was seeing what he was saying about you two being too different. You two are too different to compare in any fair way," Ruby cut across. "What do you mean?"

"Ruby, you're so hot. Like holy shit you're drop dead gorgeous," I tried. "But Weiss is my first crush. And you never forget your first. But you are so incredibly mind-blowingly hot it isn't a question."

"Yeah," Weiss agreed. "I'm not even mad. Ruby is so hot."

"Like she's smokin'. Like she's fresh out of the oven," I went on.

"You guys…" Ruby protested.

"Like her eyes just pop. You know? Her eyes are out of this world," Weiss explained. "And like, when you make her come? Right? And you see her eyes. It's like holy fuck."

"For me it's when she brushes her hair out of her face. Like black with the red tips? How does that even work? It's incredible."

"You guys…"

"What's up, Rubes?" I asked.

"Yeah, can we help you?"

"Seriously though. Can we?" I demanded.

"I'm not that hot."

"You're from another planet," Weiss took a shot.

"Seriously, can I help you with something?" I asked. "Because I will. I'd totally kill myself if you asked me. All like 'please, for me.'"

"'Please, for me?'" Weiss echoed in a Ruby-esque manner. "She knows it too. She totally knows it."

"You guys…"

"We're listening," I informed her.

"We so are. What do you need?" Weiss agreed.

"I was just saying you both do different things to me. For me. I meant for me," Ruby corrected.

"Yeah okay," I managed. "Alright. Sure you did."

"I did. I did."

"Of course you did, Ruby," Weiss coupled. "And I guess I see it. I mean you both do different things to me as well. Just different. Cloud dominates me and I dominate Ruby. Cloud tastes better but Ruby is way better looking. Two different needs are satisfied. I see it. They are just different."

"I feel that way about the way you two taste. If something happened and I could never taste one of you again… I'd … I'd go mad. I'd lose my mind."

"Cloud…" Ruby trailed.

"Cloud we feel that way about you leaving us. If something happened and we were never able to be wrapped up in your aura again it would hurt us so bad…" Weiss informed me. "If I never felt you inside of me and wrapped around me and never got to hear you make fun of yourself again, well, it would hurt me very badly. It will hurt me very badly when it goes down."

"Cloud…." Ruby mumbled. "I don't know how to handle being without you. I didn't handle it well in Mistral or Atlas. I won't handle it well here in Vale."

I said nothing. I wouldn't look at them.

"Say something," Weiss demanded. "Anything."

"You're bottling up again…" Ruby protested.

I relaxed my aura and watched it hit them again. I sighed.

"I can never truly live while my Mother walks free," I claimed. They didn't immediately argue. "I have to face her and defeat her even if it kills me. Despite the fact that it will probably kill me. Because it will probably kill me. I have to confront her anyway. Is that enough for your family?"

"Cloud, you are enough for me," Ruby mumbled.

"You're enough for our family, you are," Weiss defended.

"I have to face her anyway. I'm the only one who can be her equal. Really. On any timespan that doesn't leave people to die. I have to be the one to match her. I have to. Maybe it's impossible for me to explain. Maybe you two will never get it. But I have to fight her because of that."

"But do you? Or is it some complex you have going on in your head?" Weiss demanded.

"Because you can be with us. You don't have to leave us and go and fly to her. We're not pressing you that way," Ruby cut in quickly.

"In fact it's sort of the opposite," Weiss agreed.

"But that's all the reason more that I have to. I have to because to shrug it off on to somebody else would be… it would be… I don't know what it would be. It's unthinkable. I don't know what I would be if I didn't face her."

"A good husband and a good father?" Weiss tried.

"I'm not a person, unless I try and beat her. I'm a human if and only if I confront her. I'm not real. Unless I try my best to destroy her. I'm not. You both, as great as you are, can't make me into something real unless I do my duty to the world. I have responsibilities. I have things I must do or I forfeit my humanity. I'm not Cetra unless I try her. I'm not a person. I'm Grimm. The Grimm in me will win out unless I try my hardest to destroy her. And you're right. Maybe I should let that go. Maybe I could let that go if I was less obsessive. Maybe I could live my life. But I don't know who I am if I shirk this responsibility. If I leave it all to Oscar and Penny and Blake and Yang I become unmade. Don't ask me to not fly. You'll only hurt me and put bars in my soul."

Weiss threw up both hands in frustration. "Damn your honor. I love it about you but I can barely tolerate it. Explain that to me."

I shrugged. There wasn't anything I could do. Like a toss of a coin I couldn't even see.

"Did you guys have a good wedding?" Ruby pleaded.

"I definitely did," Weiss agreed. "It was nice and petite and I liked it."

"I had fun," I decided.

"Did you? Because it's hard to tell with you sometimes," Ruby said. "Especially when you don't let your aura out!" She bit out.

"I am!" I protested.

"But you weren't the whole time."

"I'm working on it. I'll be better about it. I promise."

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-WG