This moment right now rivals when she watched her Father die, as she stood watching over the unconscious, barely breathing form of Edelgard, inside one of the infirmary rooms.
It had now been the third day as she stood at the foot of her love's bed she felt a range of emotions.
Anger.
Tired.
But mostly powerless.
As she grabbed tightly onto the metal bars at the foot of the infirmary bed, she couldn't help but feel heavy and negative thoughts flood her mind.
You should have been there for her.
Now she's terrified that her life will end before she can achieve anything.
She wanted to live her life far away in a cottage, away from all the politics and life-threatening danger.
Now that won't happen because you couldn't find a cure in time. Not for Edelgard. Not for Lysithea. And not for the children in the other room.
They're all going to die slow painful deaths and there's nothing you can do about it.
You failed.
"Byleth…?" Byleth heard a voice coming from right beside her to her right.
She turned and saw Leonie standing next to her with two trays of food. One for herself and another for Byleth.
"Sorry. Stuck in my mind again." Byleth answered as she took her tray of food.
Leonie sighed to herself. "Yeah…" Leonie trailed off to herself as she gazed over the form of Lysithea.
Lysithea was in a similar state to Edelgard. Barely breathing and locked in an unconscious state, clinging to life as best as she could. Leonie placed her tray of food down onto a chair near Lysithea's bed as she sat on the side of her lover's bed. She took Lysithea's hand into her own and rubbed the back of the mage's hand with her thumb.
"I didn't think this would happen so soon… I thought we would have a little bit more time." Leonie sobbed, trying to keep her emotions in check, but tears couldn't help but fall down her face. Leonie wiped away the tears from her eyes with the back of her free hand. She moved her hand and saw the tear stains.
"Damn it… sorry." Leonie said as Byleth placed her tray of food down and moved to Leonie and pulled her into a tight hug.
The archer buried her face into Byleth's shoulder as she let out all of her worries that she had kept bottled up inside her. For her part, Byleth was not far off from letting her emotions fly too. Byleth was overwhelmed by everything over the last couple of days, so she buried her face into Leonie's neck, and she too let her tears go.
The two stayed together in their embrace as they let their emotions consume them both. It wasn't until the pair heard a knock at the door that the two split apart.
"Come in." Leonie called out.
Within seconds the two saw a familiar red-haired woman pop her head in from the door.
Monica quietly opened the door and closed it. She avoided eye contact with both Leonie and Byleth as she gripped tightly to frills on her mage attire. Her gaze only settled on the floor.
"I… I know I'm not supposed to be here. B-But I was so worried about Lady Edelgard and Miss Lysithea." Monica mumbled out as she finally mustered the courage to raise her head to face the pair. "I want to prove to Leonie that I can be trusted. That I am who I say I am."
A small smile formed on Byleth's features, but she wasn't the first one to reach out to the mage, as a hand from an archer was placed on her shoulder instead.
"You don't need to prove anything to me, Monica. Lysithea is in a stable for now, thanks to you. That's all that matters to me right now." Leonie said as she gently squeezed to Monica's shoulder.
Monica's smile noticeably raised as she nodded her head.
"There is something Leonie and I need to do. It's important, so can you monitor Edelgard and Lysithea. Manuela and the others are just in the other room with the children, so if they wake up just call out to them." Byleth spoke as held onto one of Monica's hands.
"A-Are you sure. W-Wouldn't Lady Edelgard prefer you to be here if… when she wakes up?" Monica asks Byleth.
However, the swordswoman shook her head as she pulled Monica into a warm hug. Monica squeaked out as soon she made contact with Byleth. Softly running her hands up her back. "There are only two people Edelgard would like to wake up to. You and I. Something all three of us will need to talk about." Byleth said the last part as she pressed her forehead against Monica's.
After a few moments, the two split apart. With rosey-coloured cheeks to match her hair, Monica nodded her head. "I'll stay with them, but you better not take too long, just in case Lady Edelgard wakes up.
Byleth smiles as she hugged tightly to Monica once more before both her and Leonie left the room.
Once outside, the atmosphere changed compared to what it was a few moments ago. It was a lot more serious.
Leonie let out a heavy sigh as Byleth spoke up. "You can stay with Monica and Lysithea. I understand if you don't want to do this."
Leonie shook her head in determination. "No, I need to be there for you. I need to know you won't go too far."
"Okay." Byleth said before she walked off towards the one area that she would not ever want to go to, but now there was no other option that Byleth thinks will help, except going directly to the cause of her pain.
"You meant what you said to Monica, right?" Leonie asked quickly to catch up with her. "About the three of you?"
Probably for the first time since the two had met back up, Leonie saw a blush on Byleth's cheeks that rivalled Monica's own from just a few minutes ago. As Byleth stopped in the middle of the hallway, Leonie managed to catch up to her as the swordswoman managed to put her thoughts together.
"I… I… It would be a lie if I said I didn't find her attractive, but I thought my heart only belonged to Edelgard. Monica has made me feel differently." Byleth said as she played with a part of her hair. "I know that whenever Edelgard sees Monica, you can sense that she's talking to her a bit differently than she is to Bernie, or Dorothea and Petra. It feels a lot more intimate. It's why I said we'll have to talk about it when Edelgard wakes up."
Leonie sighed as she placed her hand on Byleth's shoulder. "Nothing can ever be simple with you, can it? Well as long as you're happy, that's all that matters."
Byleth smiled at Leonie before focusing her attention back on to their current destination. "Come on."
Leonie mindlessly followed Byleth as the pair descended down the darkest pits of Enbarr castle. One that Byleth and Leonie did not think they would ever visit, but they were both desperate. Not just for Edelgard's and Lysithea's health and their future, but for the children's health as well. They have been through so much in just their short lives, we need to do something… anything that could save them all.
That was why Leonie and Byleth had decided to take matters into their own hands.
That was until they both heard a voice from a familiar Songstress call out to them just before they could delve deeper into the dark depths of Enbarr castle.
"Byleth? Leonie? What are you two doing here, I thought you would be with Edelgard and Lysithea."
The pair turn their heads and see Dorothea with Ingrid and Leah. The Songstress was ahead of the group as she raced ahead to Byleth and Leonie.
"Uh hey, everyone. W-What are you three doing here?" Leonie asked, trying to divert attention away from the pair of them.
Dorothea narrowed her eyes, and she glared at Leonie and Byleth. "I was heading to bed when I caught up with Ingrid and General Karma. But why are you two here? Why were you both heading towards the dung-" Dorothea cut herself off as things started to fall into place for the Songstress, as it did for Ingrid and Leah.
"You were both going down there to settle things with that Argathan after what's happened to Lysithea and Edie, aren't you?" Dorothea accused them; however, the pair could not fight back against them.
Though the line of questioning seemed to stir deep within Byleth, that she could not contain any longer. "Well what else are we supposed to do?" Byleth shouted out as she clenched her hands into tight fists.
The three were stunned. Never had they heard Byleth raise her voice at them before.
"I can't sit there and do nothing while El, Lysithea and the children slowly die; when the monster is right in there and is the one behind their suffering. You can't tell me to do nothing about it!"
To try and calm the situation Dorothea raised her hands while Leonie placed her hands on Byleth's shoulders.
"I know how you feel Byleth. Edie is one of my closest of friends, if not my dearest friend. I would do anything for her, anything at all. But I know she would not want me to change who I am and lower myself to be on the same level as them." Dorothea spoke as she dropped her arms and wrapped them around herself.
Leah was the next to reach out to Byleth. "I've known you longer than most Byleth. And I know who you were before you met everyone here. I never want to see you revert into that 'Ashen Demon' ever again."
Hearing these words from her friends had stirred something inside Byleth. Her mood lifted as her fists had relaxed as she rested her head onto Leah's chest. After a few seconds, Leah felt Byleth sob into her.
"I… I just can't bear the thought of losing her. Her Lysithea or the children. After they have all thought so hard to survive, it can't all be for nothing."
"And it won't be." The group heard from near them as a door opened with both Ferdinand and Hubert emerging from it.
The former looked exhausted, but nowhere near as exhausted as the latter. With blood dripping down from his hand and bloodshot eyes showed how abrupt seeing the pair was. It looked like he had not slept since they had brought in the Agarthan.
"Ferdinand?!" Leonie called out.
"He gave in." Hubert answered. "He gave up the information on how to undo the Crests experiments. Ferdinand has written down what the vermin said word for word so Hanneman and Linhardt can follow the instructions by the letter. There is however an issue… a big issue."
Saying this, Hubert and Ferdinand both tried to avoid eye contact with everyone.
"What is it, Hubert? Ferdinand?" Leonie asked.
Ferdinand and Hubert shared one look with each other before Ferdinand let out a heavy sigh. "While the crest experiments performed on Lysithea and Edelgard have…acclimated with their bodies. The same cannot be said for the others. As their procedures were recent compared to Lysithea's and Edelgard's; the children will most likely not survive the operation."
This stunned everyone in the area. Dorothea hugged tightly to herself, trying to stop tears from falling down her face. Ingrid and Leah dipped their heads, quietly cursed to themselves and clenched their hands into fists.
"N-No! I promised Edelgard. I promised everyone that they'll all be fine." Byleth cried out as she was not ready to accept this.
It was the same for Leonie. "Byleth's right. I promised Ly that they'll all make it. There must be something he's not telling us. There has to be. I'm not giving up on them."
However, Ferdinand and Hubert shared a look of trepidation, not giving the group any hope at all.
"No…" Byleth fell to her knees as Dorothea went to her side.
"There's something more…" Ferdinand spoke again.
All eyes were on the pair again. This time Hubert was the one to speak.
"I received word from Manuela and Hanneman on Lady Lysithea's and Lady Edelgard's health. They wanted to keep up appearances with you all, while sharing with me their realistic prognosis."
Ferdinand's eyes never broke from Hubert as he continued.
"Their health is deteriorating faster than Manuella and Hanneman can keep them stabilised. They need this operation urgently. Edelgard needs to survive. I refuse to let her ideals die… let her die." Hubert declared as he clenched his fists tightly.
"And what, leave the children with no hope of survival!?" Dorothea bit back. "No, I'm not letting them go. They deserve that chance after everything they have gone through."
"I know… When Ferdinand forced me to take breaks, I visited them. Got to know them all. It was… pleasant. Rescuing them was some of the only good that had come out of all the bloodshed." Hubert said not meeting anyone's eyes, instead, uncharacteristically of him, he lowered his head, and his hands started to shake.
"But I have dedicated my life to serving her majesty. I cannot bear the thought of living in a world without Lady Edelgard in it. Without her ideals in this world, I fear what the nobles will subject the lower class to without our intervention. That is why I am asking you of this, Byleth."
"Hubert no." Dorothea cut in.
Ignoring her, Hubert continued. "Byleth. I really am sorry about the children, but there is something I need you to do for me… I need you to save Edelgard… Please."