South Park: The Journey of Jessie Gladstone in The Stick of Truth!

by Vgn Golley

A young boy had recently moved into a quiet little mountain town named 'South Park' with his family in hopes of being able to live an everyday normal life, but all of that changed when Jessie Gladstone found out that South Park isn't your average little town and hopes that no one finds out about his powers or his mysterious and dark past. Rated M because it's South Park.

8. Third Day in South Park-Part 2

Hey, guys. Welcome to the final chapter of 'South Park: The Journey of Jessie Gladstone in The Stick of Truth!'. I hope that you guys will enjoy the final chapter...anyway, I don't own anything except for my OCs.

NOW LET'S GET ON WITH THE STORY!

"So, what are we doing here, Jessie?" Heidi asked curiously as we see her, Jessie, Paladin Butters, Princess Kenny, Prince Karen, and Jessie Jr. arriving at the South Park Hospital.

"Well, I gave a theory that the documents could potentially be transferred over to this hospital." Jessie says while arriving at the front doors of the hospital, and then he turns to the others. "I will go in while the rest of you stay here." Jessie instructed as Heidi and the others nodded and stayed bye as the blue-haired boy entered the South Park Hospital and made his way through the halls of the building, planning to go to the Hospital Record Room, but stopped upon seeing Marjorine doing a medical exam in one of the rooms with a doctor as he peered in curiously.

"Alright, time to do a Breast Exam, so you mind taking off your blouse, ma'am?" The Doctor asked as Marjorine nodded and reached down to grab her blouse as she took it off to reveal her DD-Cup Breasts, causing Jessie's jaw to drop and blush from head to toe at the glorious sight before him.

"I never knew that such big breasts could exist, it's like staring into heaven." A stunned and blushing Jessie thought to himself in awe while reaching into his pocket to pull out his phone to take about fifty pictures of Marjorine's big boobs from all angles as he then put away his phone and looked away with a guilty look on his face. "I'm sorry for breaking the bro code, Butters, but that was such a glorious sight, totally worth it." Jessie thought to himself with a frown before glancing down at the photos of Marjorine's Boobs on his phone and blushed with a goofy smile on his face as he then walked off and made his way back outside of the South Park Hospital as Paladin Butters turned to him.

"Were you able to get the documents translated, Commander Douchebag?"

"Uh...no...I...got a bit distracted, so let's go to the Kingdom of the North instead." Jessie semi-lied as the group eyed him oddly but nodded as they made their way over to press a nearby Fast Travel Flag, summoning Timmy as he then drove them all towards the edge of the Lost Forest, and the gang jumped off from the carriage as he drove off. "Wait, quick question, how are we going to get to Canada? It will take us weeks to get there on foot, and we don't have enough money to fly to Canada."

"Oh, don't worry, we will get there in less than a minute. Follow me." Heidi says reassuringly while walking forward with the others following after her as Jessie raises an eyebrow confusedly but follows after the group as they begin walking through the Lost Forest while making sure to keep going north as, after walking through the forest for less than a minute, the gang were able to finally arrived at the borders of Canada, which was a really small post manned by a Canadian Border Guard as Jessie blinked slowly in disbelief and shock.

"Wait, hold on," Jessie says while walking back into the Lost Forest as he then uses his super speed to rush back into South Park in less than a second before rushing back through the Lost Forest to arrive at the Borders of the Kingdom of North as the blue-haired boy begins running back and forth repeatedly before stopping near the group as he made sure that they weren't looking at him when he speed blitz in. "WHAT THE HELL HAPPEN TO WYOMING AND MONTANA?! AND HOW ARE WE IN THE EAST COST?!"

"Mmm mmmmm mmmmm, mmm mmmm. Mmmm'mm mm Mmmm Mmmm Mmmmm. Mmmmm mmm mmmm mm. (I don't know, my love. It's a South Park Thing. Don't think about it)," Princess Kenny says with a shrug as she and the others stepped forward with Heidi reaching over to grab Jessie's hand and lead him forward as he still looked stunned and worried as the Canadian Border Guard spotted them and stepped forward with a serious glare on his face as he held out his hand.

"Halt! This is as far as you go, buddies! Ahead of you lies the great kingdom of Canada! It is accessible only to the most noble and valiant of people! All of you cannot pass because I see that none of you are Canadians! And there is only one way a Non-Canadian can ever hope to enter the gates of our country! You kids must go back to your land and return here with...a passport!"

"You mean like these ones?" Jessie asked while holding out all of their passports as the Canadian Border Guard gasped in shock and awe.

"Ah, I see that you kids already have a passport! All right, hand them over!" The Canadian Border Guard ordered as Jessie gave all of their passports over to him, and said person inspected their passports as he nodded. "Papers appear to be in order. Very well, I hereby grant thee access to the great nation of Canada! OPEN THE DGATE!"

"..."

"Oh, I'll do it. Hold on. " The Canadian Border Guard says with a sheepish blush upon realizing that he would have to, 'Open the gate' himself as he makes his way over to his post and presses a button on the console to have the barrier open up. "There you go." The Canadian Border Guard says as Jessie and the others go passed the border to arrive in Canada, where the whole land resembles an old 8-bit videogame as Jessie looks stunned while the others are unfazed by this.

"I...I...It's a South Park Thing, huh?"

"Yeah, just roll with it." Prince Karen advised as Jessie sighed heavily and massaged his temples but nodded as the gang made their way over to Ottawa, and noticed a lot of buildings and shops around as the blue-haired boy perked up.

"Wait, before we do the mission, we should take the chance to buy some new stuff."

"But none of us have any Canadian Money, Jess," Heidi says as Jessie hums thoughtfully.

"True." Jessie says while looking around as he then spotted the Ottawa Bank. "Ah, there we go." Jessie says with a grin while he and the others make their way into the bank as they walk up to the Bank Teller. "Hey, dude, is there any way for me to exchange my American Money for Candian Money?"

"Oho, American Money, huh? Well, the current exchange rate is 1.24 to the dollar." The Bank Teller explained as Jessie nodded and exchanged all of his American Money for Canadian Money as he now had 74.40 Canadian Money as the gang then walked out of the Ottawa Bank and made their way over to a store named, 'Ottawa Goods and Supples'.

"Welcome to the shop. Can I interest you in my wares?" The Shop Owner asked as Jessie hummed and was quick to buy a Level 12 Canadian Halberd for 28.52 Dollars, and he also bought a Level 14 Rubber Grip Patch for 24.80 Dollars, which added 250 Damage to weapon attacks and Jessie decided to add his Level 11 IV Needle Patch as he then handed it over to Heidi.

"Here, you would need a new weapon far more than I do."

"Awww, thanks." Heidi says while taking the weapon and kissing his cheek as Prince Karen cooed, and Princess Kenny fumed as she angrily mumbled, 'No good homewrecking cunt' under her breath.

"We should return to the quest at hand, my lord." Butters says as Jessie nods, and the gang walks out of the store as they then to the royal palace in Ottawa and find the Prince and Princess of Canada sitting on their thrones.

Sitting before them is a 6-feet-tall, 35-year-old Male Canadian with the standard flopping Canadian head as he has a pair of small black beady eyes, combed blonde hair, no nose, a sharp chin, Light Skin, a tall slim build, and was wearing a military dress uniform, which consists of a red coat with lots of buttons, a large silver medal, a yellow sash, a blue belt, black pants with gray stripes, and a pair of black shoes. His real name is unknown, but he is the Prince of Canada.

Sitting before them is a 5'8-feet-tall, 33-year-old Female Canadian with the standard flopping Canadian head as she has a pair of small black beady eyes, curly-tipped long dark brown hair that reaches past her shoulders with a bang, no nose, red lipstick, a sharp chin, Light Skin, a tall slender build, and her outfit consists of a pearly-white headband, a gold necklace with three emeralds, a long lilac silk dress that reaches down to her legs, a white bracelet, and a pair of black pumped heels. Her real name is unknown, but she is the Princess of Canada.

"Well, well, what have we here? A group of heroes from the South? Not just anyone can pass the guard at the great border. You kids must have beaten the odds and obtained...a passport. I am the Prince of Canada and this is my lovely wife." The Prince of Canada says just as the Princess of Canada takes a queef as Heidi, Prince Karen, and Princess Kenny laughed as Jessie and Paladin Butters looked disgusted by this. "How can I help you?"

"We need you to get this documents translated for us." Jessie says while handing the documents over to the Prince of Canada, who read them as he hummed and handed them back to the blue-haired boy.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know what this says. I've seen this language before, though, but I believe it is only spoken in a specific part of Canada. I suggest you travel west of here and seek out the Earl of Winnipeg. He can tell you where in Canada they speak this freakish tongue, but I warn you, the wilderness of Canada is filled with dire wolves! You know what dire wolves are, right? They're like wolves, but they're dire."

"Gotcha, don't worry, we can handle them," Jessie says with a sharp nod as he and the others turn around to try, and leave the royal palace, only to be stopped by a Gift Shop Owner as he holds out his hand.

"Hold it right there. Here are your photos with the Prince and Princess. Would you like two 8x10s or six 5x7s?"

"Hmmm...8x10s," Jessie says as the Gift Shop Owner nods and hands the photo over to Jessie as well as a chest full of stuff.

"All right, there you go. You can exit right through there."

"Nah, I would have picked the other size." Butters says with a shrug as Jessie rolls his eyes dryly before pocketing the photo as he then opens up the chest and spots a Canadian Gemsonte, Spoiled Royal Pudding, Mana Potion (Large), and a Level 12 Joy Buzzer Patch, which lowers Enemy Attack on Perfect Strike as Heidi perked up.

"Oh, that is perfect for my weapon," Heidi says while reaching over to grab the patch and adding it to her weapon as she takes out her Level 11 IV Needle Patch and the group leaves the Royal Palace as they are able to make their way out of Ottawa and begin making their way over to Winnipeg, but stopped as a group of Dire Wolfs appeared and growled at them threateningly as a determined Butters stepped forward.

"Don't worry, I got this." Butters says while activating his Professor Chaos Move as a butterfly appears in his hand, and Butters smiles cheerfully before growing a sinister smirk as he chuckles. "Let's see how they like dealing with me!" Butters screamed while grabbing onto his cape as he whirled around, and transformed into the Anime Version of his Professor Chaos form as he laughed evilly, and then walked forward with his steps shaking the ground underneath him as he then floated upwards while crossing his arms with his cape blowing in the wind as his body radiated with golden electricity. "Chaos Blast!" Anime Professor Chaos screamed while cupping his arms together as a huge ball of yellow electricity appeared in between his hands and let out a loud battle cry as Butters fired a huge yellow energy laser in the shape of lightning as it impacted against all of the Dire Wolves, killing them as Butters then morphed back to normal.

"Good job, Butters." Jessie says with a grin as Heidi looks stunned by what she saw, and the others cheer for Butters, who blushes sheepishly as the group then enters Winnipeg and is stopped by a Canadian Guard.

"Welcome to Winnipeg. This is a conservative township, so mind your P's and Q's. Do whatever you want with your Ts and Ms, however."

"Does anyone know what that means?" A bewildered Prince Karen asked as the others shrugged and walked over to get inside Winnipeg's Block and Tackle as the Shop Owner smiled at them.

"Welcome to the shop. Can I interest you in my wares?" The Shop Owner asked as Jessie hummed and was quick to buy a Level 12 Dire Bear Claw Patch, which allows for attacks to ignore up to 200 Attack and costs about 18.60 Dollars as well as buying the Level 12 Fortitude Patch, which gains 20% bonus HP after a Magic Attack and costs about 24.80 Dollars as Jessie then handed it over to Heidi, who replaced the first patch with her Level 12 Rubber Grip Patch and added the second patch to her Level 14 Crossbow of Impalment that Jessie had given her a while ago as the group then walked out of the shop and made their way to arrive at Earl of Winnipeg's Palace as they walked up to him.

"Hey, who are you? What do you want?"

"We need your help translating this document for us." Heidi says while handing the documents over to Earl, who read it and nodded as he then handed it back to her.

"Ah yes, This writing is definitely Canadian, but why should I help a couple of foreigners when Winnipeg is completely overrun with dire bears?! Tell you what, kill off all the dire bears in the north part of town and I'll help you however I can!"

"Of course," Jessie says with a dry tone as Princess Kenny turns to him.

"Mmmm mmm, mmmmm, Mmm mmm mmm mmmm Mmm Mmmmm. Mmmm mmmm mmmm mmm mm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmmm mmm Mmmm Mmmm? (Don't worry, honey, I will handle those Dire Bears. Why don't you stay here and look after our child while I go and kill those Dire Bears?)," Princess Kenny suggested while handing her baby over to an uncomfortable Jessie as Prince Karen turned to her.

"Mind if come?"

"Mmmm (Sure)," Princess Kenny says while she and Prince Karen turn around to leave the palace as they walk forward and are able to see a bunch of Canadians crowding around another Canadian as one of them turns to the group.

"This poor citizen was killed by a Dire Bear. You know what a Dire Bear is right? It's like a bear...but dire." The Canadian says as Princess Kenny and Prince Karen rolled their eyes dryly as they walk deeper into the forest and were able to arrive at a cave filled with Dire Bears as they spotted the Poor Siblings and growled angrily.

"Mmmm, mmmm mmm, Mmmmmm. Mmm mmm mm mmm mmm mmm mm mmm mmm mmm mm mmm mmm (Alright, stand back, Karen. I will get one half and you get the other half)," Princess Kenny said to Prince Karen, who nodded and watched on as his older sister decided to activate her Unicorn Stampede Move and raised her hands as a rainbow aura covered her body, and Kenny was able to summon a horde of Unicorns as they appeared onto the scene and neighed loudly as they all proceed to trample half of the Dire Bears.

"I got this." Prince Karen says while pulling out his sword as he activates his Sword in the Stone Move and proceeds to stab it down onto the ground as Prince Karen then lets out a loud battle cry and swings his sword forward, creating a huge white shockwave that travels over to the Remaining Dire Bears and collided against them, sending them all flying back as they flew through the air and disappeared from sight as they left behind a twinkle.

"Mmmm mmmm, Mmmmm Mmm (Good job, Prince Karen)," Princess Kenny praised as Prince Karen beamed and nodded while going over to get the Dire Bear Pelts as the Poor Siblings turned around and made their way back over to Earl of Winnipeg's Palace as they spotted Jessie and Heidi staring down at Jessie Jr.

"He's kind of cute, don't you think?"

"Maybe, but it's a doll, Heidi. Don't encourage him."

"True, but still, you look really hot holding a baby in your arms. Makes me think how things will be in the future~," Heidi says with a teasing tone as Jessie blushed just as Princess Kenny and Prince Karen appeared as he turned to them.

"You guys killed them?"

"Yep, here they are." Prince Karen says while he and Princess Kenny hand all of the Dire Bears Pelts over to the Earl of Winnipeg as he perks up happily.

"By Jove, you have done it. Look at all these dire bear pelts. Now I can finally make a dire robe. Anyway, I wanted to say that your document is actually written in the language of Eastern Canadian. The Minister of Montreal can translate it, but I'm afraid the Prince has imprisoned the Minister of Montreal in the caverns of Quebec. I will speak with the Prince. Return to him and he should let you speak with the minister." Earl of Winnipeg instructed as everyone groaned just as Jessie heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that the Earl of Winnipeg had sent him a Friend Request as the blue-haired boy accepted it and the gang turned around to walk out of the palace as they made their way out of Winnipeg and walked back to Ottawa as Jessie and the others walked up to the Royal Palace to talk with the Prince and Princess of Canada.

"There you are. I understand you kids wished me to release the Minister of Montreal. I'd like to help you, but I think this might be another ploy by the Bishop of Banff to have Montreal allowed back into the kingdom."

"Some Canadians think our nation should be united again, my Lord." A Royal Guard says as the Prince of Canada stared at him for a long while before slapping him as he glared at his shocked Guard.

"Shut up! Who are fuck are you?!" The Prince of Canada snapped angrily as he then turned back to the group. "Listen, it's all because the Bishop of Banff is a liberal. He does these things just to make life difficult for me. I must ask you to perform another noble quest: go to Banff and kill the Bishop."

"Kill the Bishop of Banff?!" A gasping Princess of Canada asked as even Jessie and the others looked stunned by what they heard.

"Look, just kill the Bishop of Banff for me, and bring his balls as proof. Do this and I shall allow you into the Catacombs of Quebec. Make haste." Prince of Canada ordered as Jessie and the others turned around to walk out of the Royal Palace.

"We...We are not going to kill the Bishop of Banff, right?" Paladin Butters asked nervously as Jessie shook his head.

"Nah, I have a plan," Jessie says while he and the others walk out of Ottawa as they walk over to the dead Dire Wolves from earlier, and the blue-haired boy uses his Sweet Katanna to cut off their balls and grab them.

"Ooh, that's gross and horrible but a good plan, babe." Heidi complimented as Jessie smirked cockily and bowed playfully as the gang then made their over to Banff and walked over to the Church to meet up with the Bishop of Banff.

"Praise Christ. Praise God. Praise God and Christ. Also, the Prince thinks Canada is a monarchy, but there are other people with opinions by God. Sorry, God." The Bishop of Banff says as he then notices the other kids. "Oh, hey, what do you kids want?"

"Okay, so, listen up, the Prince of Canada wanted us to come here and kill you and cut off your balls for evidence," Jessie says, alarming the Bishop of Banff as Heidi raises her hands reassuringly.

"But don't worry because we don't want to do that."

"Instead, our friend Jessie here had cut off the balls of a Dire Wolf and will tell the Prince of Canada that we had kill you." Paladin Butters says as Princess Kenny nods.

"Mmmm mmmm mmm mmm mmmm mmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmm mmm (All we need of you is to hide from the public view until tomorrow),"

"Oh, really? That sounds like a great idea. Thanks for sparing my life, kids, and as a token of my appreciation, here is a gift for you." The Bishop of Banff says with a smile while reaching behind him to grab some Bishop Clothes and a chest full of stuff as Jessie reaches over to grab them and opens up the chest to reveal that there is a Level 12 Discus of Bleeding, a Positive Queefy Sore Test, a Level 13 Ranger Patch, a Power Potion (Large), and a Revive Potion as he pocketed them and turned around to go over into the changing room as, after a few minutes of waiting, Heidi and the others spotted Jessie coming out of the changing room while wearing his 3D Glasses, a blue Bishop Mitre with a red furry tip and accents as it had a Level 14 Purple Heart Badge attached to it, a blue/red Bishop Vestments with a Level 12 Fencing Patch and a Level 12 Gauntlet Patch attached to it, and his Bishop Gloves as it had his Level 12 Demon Claw attached to them.

"Alright, let's go and trick the Prince of Canada, guys," Jessie says with a sly grin on his face as everyone cheers and turns around to leave as he was planning to follow after them, but stops as the blue-haired boy hears his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that the Bishop of Banff had sent him a Friend Request as Jessie accepted it before following after his friends as the gang made their way over to arrive back at Ottawa and walked up to the Royal Palace to talk with the Prince and Princess of Canada.

"Is he dead? Did you kill him?"

"Yep." Jessie lied bluntly while tossing the Dire Wolf Balls over to the Prince of Canada, who caught them as he perked up.

"Yay, the Bishop's balls! Now religion won't interfere with government! How can we ever repay you?"

"You said you would free the Minister of Montreal," Heidi pointed out as the Prince of Canada laughed a bit and shook his head.

"Sorry, no can do. With both the Bishop and the Minister taken care of, my throne is secure." The Prince of Canada says, shocking and pissing off the kids as a shocked Princess of Canada turned to him.

"But, my liege, we made a promise."

"Shhh, you, shhh." The Prince of Canada shushed as he turned around to leave, and a fuming Jessie was planning to go over and beat him up but was stopped by the Princess of Canada as she walked over to them urgently.

"You must speak with the Duke of Vancouver. He can help you get into the Catacombs of Quebec. Give the Duke this." Queen of Canada says while reaching into her dress to pull out a white letter and hand it over to Jessie. "Hurry now!"

"Thank you for the help, Queen." Jessie says with a grateful tone as he kisses her hand, causing her to blush and giggle as Heidi frowns but said nothing as she and the others turn around to make their way out of the Royal Palace as they walk out of Ottawa as the blue-haired boy hears his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that the Prince and Princess of Canada had sent him a couple of Friend Requests as Jessie accepted them and the gang then made their way over to Vancouver as they walked over to the palace and walked inside to meet the Duke of Vancouver.

"Hey, sir, the Queen had sent you this letter," Jessie says while handing the white letter over to the Duke of Vancouver as he seems surprised by this.

"A letter from the princess?" Duke of Vancouver says while reading the letter as he then gasped in shock. "What the...why, according to this, the Prince had something to do with the Bishop's murder and has imprisoned the Minister unjustly. Kids, if you wish to brave the Catacombs of Quebec, you would have to speak with the monks who live to the southeast of town. Only they could train you in such sorcery."

"Understood," Jessie says with a nod while he and the others turn around to walk out of the palace just as the blue-haired boy hears his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that the Duke of Vancouver has sent him a Friend Request as Jessie accepted it and also noticed that he now had 85 Friends, signaling that he had enough friends for a New Perk now as the blue-haired boy was quick to press the Perk Tab and looked through the whole selection of different perks as, after looking at all of them carefully, Jessie decided to pick the 'Mauler' Perk, which will allow his melee attacks to do extra damage as he then put away his phone and turned to his friends. "Alright, guys, you stay here while I go and deal with those Monks of the Southeast."

"Okay, stay safe," Heidi said while kissing Jessie's cheek as he winked at her and turned around to leave as his crush then turned around to walk away.

"What are you doing?" Prince Karen asked curiously as Heidi turned her head.

"Going over to steal from the Bishop. I know Jessie would've wanted to, so I'm doing him a favor." Heidi explained while going into the Church as she went over to open up a closet and spotted a chest as the Multiple Personality Disorder Girl then opened it and saw a Lumberjack Beard, a Level 11 Serrated Axe of Rending, a Dire Heart, a Strength Potion, and a Level 12 Barbarian Helmet as Heidi quickly put on the helmet and dyed it lime green/red as we cue back over to Jessie and we see him traveling southeast as he noticed a large wooden house placed on a nearby island and the blue-haired boy quickly took off into the air as he flew through the ocean and landed on the island as Jessie went over to open the door of the wooden house and was shocked to see Terrance and Phillip standing before them.

Standing before them is a 5'8-feet-tall, 54-year-old Male Canadian with the standard flopping Canadian head as he has a pair of small black beady eyes, black hair, no nose, a sharp chin, Light Skin, a tall slim build, and his outfit consists of a long-sleeved red shirt with a large black 'T' symbol on it, long gray trousers, and a pair of black shoes. His name is Sir Terrance Henry Stoot from the 'small village' of Toronto, the one-half of the famous Canadian Comedy Duo who is one of the stars of The Terrance and Phillip Show.

Standing before them is a 5'8-feet-tall, 53-year-old Male Canadian with the standard flopping Canadian head as he has a pair of small black beady eyes, blonde hair, no nose, a sharp chin, Light Skin, a tall slim build, and his outfit consists of a long-sleeved blue shirt with a large black 'P' symbol on it, long gray trousers, and a pair of black shoes. His name is Sir Phillip Niles Argyle of Montréal, the one-half of the famous Canadian Comedy Duo who is one of the stars of The Terrance and Phillip Show.

"Who are you?" Terrance asked as a starstruck Jessie stared at them in awe.

"O-Oh, uh, I'm J-Jessie Gladstone, sirs. I'm your biggest fan." Jessie says as Phillip perks up.

"Wait, Terrance, I recognize that name He's the American everyone is talking about,"

"Nah, can't be. He can't be a master of spellcraft, he doesn't even know magic." Terrance says doubtfully as Phillip sighs heavily and nods.

"He probably doesn't even know how to fart." Phillip says as Jessie perked up and grinned cockily.

"Oh, I see what you guys are talking about. Maybe you guys are talking about...this! Dragonshout!" Jessie screamed while turning his ass towards Philip as he lets out a loud fart bubble that flew over to impact against him.

"Ho! He knows Dragonshout!"

"Oh, please, any magician's apprentice can Dragonshout." A scoffing Terrance says as he rolls his eyes. "It's not like he farted into his hand and hit you in the face with it, Phillip."

"You mean like...this! Cup-A-Spell!" Jessie shouted while hovering his hand behind his ass as he then lets out a loud fart bubble and cupped it as Jessie lets out a loud yell and thrust his arm forward as his fart bubble flew over to impact Phillip's face.

"My god! He can cup a spell!" A shocked Terrance says as Phillip hums thoughtfully and rubs his chin.

"Oh, yeah? If he's really good, how come he can't sneak a fart behind your face?"

"Sneaky Squeaker!" Jessie whispered-yelled under his breath while twirling around as his face scrunched up a bit and proceeds to fart into his hand as he then threw his smelly projectile forward and was able to manipulate it to fly over and appear behind an oblivious Terrance and Phillip as his fart cloud detonated, letting out a loud farting noise as the bewildered Canadian Comedy Duo turned around and saw that there was nothing standing behind them as they gasped and turned to Jessie with amazement in their eyes.

"The Sneaky Squeaker. Very impressive. He is worthy of our training after all."

"Yes, prepare thyself, child. It is time for you to learn some true magic." Phillip says while he and Terrance fart on Jessie's face, causing him to yelp in surprise and groaned as he slowly went unconscious, and we then fast forward in time as Jessie opened his eyes and stood up from the floor as he was surprised to see him Terrance, and Phillip standing in a completely blank dimension. "Your magic is impressive, young American."

"Not since Eric von Thunderpants of Nova Scotia have we seen such prowess."

"But now, you must learn to control your anus muscles in just the right way to change a spell's frequency." Phillip says as a concrete wall appears before Jessie.

"Some objects seem too large to be damaged by magic, but now, I will break through it with...Nagasaki!" Terrance says while turning to aim his ass at the concrete wall as he then held in a fart and his asscheeks began juggling as the Canadian Comedy Star then lets out a loud fart that completely destroyed the concrete wall and another concrete wall appeared.

"Here, watch again." Phillip says while turning to aim his ass at the concrete wall as he then held in a fart and his asscheeks began juggling as the Canadian Comedy Star then lets out a loud fart that completely destroyed the concrete wall and a third concrete wall appeared. "Now you try. Believe in yourself." Phillip says as Jessie nodded while turning to aim his ass at the concrete wall as he then held in a fart and his asscheeks began juggling as the blue-haired boy then lets out a loud fart that completely destroyed the concrete wall.

"That's it. Now let us see how Nagasaki works in battle." Terrance says as Three Pedophilic Canadians appear before Jesie. "These three pedophiles from Alberta will have their way with you unless you damage them all in one move," Terrance says as Jessie nods and grows serious as he glares over at the Three Pedophilic Canadians.

"Nagasaki!" Jessie exclaimed while turning to aim his ass at the Three Pedophilic Canadians as he then held in a fart, and his asscheeks began juggling as the blue-haired boy then lets out a loud fart that caused all of the Three Pedophilic Canadians to get blown up into a billion bloody pieces and Terrance and Phillip shared a good laugh.

"That's it! You have the power!" Terrance cheered as, the next thing Jessie knew, he woke up from the dimension and stood up from the floor as he then turned to Terrance and Phillip.

"You did it. Now go out and use your anus for the good of mankind."

"And don't ever, EVER fart on a man's balls."

"Why do I feel like I'm going to fart on a man's balls soon?" Jessie asked himself deadpannedly just as his phone's notification sound rang out as he reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Terrance and Phillip had sent him a couple of Friend Requests as Jessie eagerly accepted them. "I have Terrance and Phillip as my facebook my friends. My life is complete." Jessie thought to himself with starry eyes while turning around to walk out of the wooden house as he then took off into the air and let out a loud cheer as the blue-haired boy then made his way over to the main island and landed on the ground as Jessie then ran forward and was able to eventually meet up with his friends as they turned to him.

"Did you learn from the Monks, Jessie?" Butters asked curiously as Jessie nodded with a grin.

"Yep, let's go and save the Minister of Montreal." A determined and happy Jessie says as Heidi and the others nod as they all turn around to walk out of Vancouver and travel over to arrive at the Catacombs of Quebec as the gang spots the Minister of Montreal standing at the dead end of the cavern with a large boulder blocking the cavern and a white spider web as Jessie walked over to place a Poutine, allowing for the Canadian Barking Spider of the Queefing Caverns as Jessie swiftly sliced it in half with the help of his Sweet Katana as Princess Kenny hummed and stared at the large boulder thoughtfully as she rubbed Jessie Jr.'s back.

"Mmmm mmm mmm mmm mmmmmm mmm mmm? (How are we going to deal with that?)," Princess Kenny asked as Jessie perked up, realizing what to do as he stepped forward.

"Nagasaki!" Jessie exclaimed while turning to aim his ass at the large boulder as he then held in a fart and his asscheeks began juggling as the blue-haired boy then lets out a loud fart that exploded the large boulder and the gang looked shocked by what they see.

"Whoa, that was cool...gross...but cool." Heidi complimented as Jessie winked at her and the gang walked forward as they noticed a group of Dire Animals standing in front of the scared Minister.

"Oui, oui, oui! Cela est mauvais! Allo? Au secours! (Yes, yes, yes! This is bad! Hello? Help!)," The Minister of Montreal pleaded as a determined Jessie was about to fight the Dire Animals, but then Heidi's face twitched as she reached over to place her hand on his shoulder.

"Wait, Jessie, let me handle these poor infected and diseased creatures," Heidi says with a calmer and warmer tone as Jessie and the others turn to her and they notice that Heidi now has glowing green pupils, long pale blonde hair that reaches down to her back, and her outfit now consisted of a white toga wrapped around her body as it reaches down to her legs and had a pink flower planted in her hair.

"Oh, uh, okay, what's your name?"

"Call me, Dawn," The Now-Named Dawn says while floating up into the air and getting into a lotus position as she floated closer to the Dire Animals, who hissed threateningly but then stopped upon noticing her calm demeanor as they growled softly. "I'm sorry, little ones, but please allow us to bring the Minister of Montreal to safety." Dawn pleaded as the Dire Animals growled lightly but nodded while stepping to the side as Jessie and the others were shocked by this but perked up as they walked past the Dire Animals and made their way over to the Minister of Montreal.

"Je suis libre! Je suis libre! Oh, ne vous besoin de quelque chose traduit? (I'm free! I'm free! Oh, don't you need something translated?)," Minister of Montreal asked as the kids nodded and Jessie handed him the documents as he began translating them. "Cela se traduit par cela...cela se traduit par cela...voilà! Bonjour! Merci beaucoup! (This translates to this... this translates to this... there you go! Hello! Thank you very much!)," The Minister of Montreal says as Jessie nods and smiles.

"Thanks for this, dude." Jessie says as he then turns to Butters, Princess Kenny, Prince Karen, and Jessie Jr. "Why don't you guys take him back home and then go back to the others to rest for the final battle? Dawn and I have a couple of things to do before meeting up with the Girls."

"That's a good idea, Commander Douchebag. See you guys soon." Paladin Butters says while he, Princess Kenny, Prince Karen, and Jessie Jr. began leading the Minister of Montreal away as his phone's notification rang out, and Jessie reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that the Minister of Montreal had sent him a Friend Request as he accepted it and noticed that the Princess of Canada had left a message saying, 'You are the true hero of Canada!', as the blue-haired boy smiled and put away his phone as he then turned to Dawn.

"Hey, Dawn, we are leaving."

"Oh, okay, stay safe, my little friends," Dawn says to the Dire Animals with a smile before floating over to Jessie, who smiles as he holds out his hand.

"Shall we?"

"Ooh, what a gentleman~," Dawn says with a giggle while grabbing his hand as the lovebirds then took flight and made their way out of the Catacombs of Quebec as they then flew over to Ottawa and landed on the ground as Jessie and Dawn then walked over to get inside of Ottawa Bank as they walk up to the Bank Teller.

"Hey, dude, is there any way for me to exchange my Canadian Money for American Money?"

"Oho, Canadian Money, huh? Well, the current exchange rate is 1.24 to the dollar." The Bank Teller explained as Jessie nodded and exchanged all of his Canadian Money for American Money as he now had 94.12 American Money, which surprised the blue-haired boy as he thought that he would have less money, but shrugged and turned around to leave the Ottawa Bank as, after making sure that no one was looking, the lovebirds then held hands and flew up high into the air as they flew forward and were able to leave Canada as the duo were able to arrive at the Lost Forest and were planning to fly away, but stopped as a flyer flew over to collide against Jessie's face, confusing him as he took it off his face and read it as it says, 'You are cordially invited to the annual blood orgy'.

"...Okay, what?" A bewildered Jessie asked before shaking his head as he turned to Dawn. "Hey, do you know when Heidi and I went to the sewers and found that large boulder that we can't break through? Do you mind waiting for me there while I do something real quick?" Jessie asked as Dawn nodded softly and flew off as the blue-haired boy then flew in the opposite direction and checked the flyer as he went left, up, left, down, and then left again through the Lost Forest as Jessie was able to arrive at a small meadow and noticed a bunch of Christmas Woodland Critters standing before him as they were named Beary, Rabbity, Skunky, Beavery, Mousey, Squirrely, Deery, Woodpeckery, Porcupiney, Foxy, Chickadee-y, and Raccoony.

"Oh, look at this, y'all. A New Kid has come into the forest to have his soul saved." Squirrely says as the others cheered happily. "If you want your soul saved, all you gots to do is accept the one true lord as your personal savior, and renounce all others as false idols."

"...I accept." Jessie lied while having his fingers crossed behind his back as he was thinking about God as his only lord and savior.

"You're saved! Praise be to Satan, your new dread master! Now we can all be friends on Facebook!" Squirrely says as the others cheered happily just as the blue-haired boy hears his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Beary, Rabbity, Skunky, Beavery, Mousey, Squirrely, Deery, Woodpeckery, Porcupiney, Foxy, Chickadee-y, and Raccoony had all send him Friend Requests as Jessie reluctantly accepted them and also noticed that he now had 101 Friends, signaling that he had enough friends for one Final New Perk as the blue-haired boy was quick to press the Perk Tab and looked through the whole selection of different perks as, after looking at all of them carefully, Jessie decided to pick the 'Griefer' Perk, which will allow him to become one with the taunt, inflicting extra damage against (And taking less damage from) Pissed Off Enemies and noticed that Beary has sent a message saying, 'Having moments of doubt. If Satan exists, why does he let good things happen to good people?', and Squirrely responded by saying, 'Now cheer up, y'all. If he didn't give them hope, how could he ever crush their dreams?' as Chickadee-y had sent a message saying, 'Chickadee-y has invited you to a Blood Orgy next Sunday'.

"I'm going to Church tomorrow after this whole mess is done," Jessie says with a shiver while putting away his phone as he then turns around to fly out of the Lost Forest and lands on the snowy ground as he runs forward and is able to find a nearby manhole cover as the blue-haired boy walked over to bend down and grab it as he took off the sewer manhole cover and jumped down into the sewers as Jessie then flew forward and was able to find the underground cave that leads to the large boulder as he spotted Dawn standing near it.

"There you are. Are you ready for this?"

"Definitely," Jessie says as he grinned cockily. "Nagasaki!" Jessie exclaimed while turning to aim his ass at the large boulder as he then held in a fart, and his asscheeks began juggling as the blue-haired boy then lets out a loud fart that exploded the large boulder, and the lovebirds were able to see a Biebersaurus Chinpokomon as well as a Crab Person as Jessie went over to grab the doll.

"Human, your anus pulverized the rock that was the inter-dimensional gateway between our worlds! Now it's destroyed, Crab People ca conquer humanity, and it's all thanks to you! Thank you friend!" The Crab Person says with an evil laugh just as the blue-haired boy hears his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Crab Person has sent him a Friend Request as Jessie reluctantly accepts it and notices that he had sent a message saying, 'I keep having the same dream. I'm sitting in a hot tub, and it keeps getting a little warmer. Then I wake up covered in carapaze secretions' as a worried Jessie turned to Dawn.

"So, uh, Dawn, what are your powers again?"

"Oh, I can control the elements," Dawn explained as Jessie nodded.

"Good, can you recreate that boulder?"

"I can, but I'm a pacifist, so I won't feel okay trapping a creature of Earth," Dawn says with a somber frown as Jessie shakes his head and points over at the Crab Person.

"But the thing is that he is NOT from Earth."

"...Fair point." Dawn says with a nod as she and Jessie then walked out of the small cavern before her eyes glow green as she raises her hand and recreates the boulder, trapping the Crab Person inside as he lets out a loud, 'NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!'. "Now that is done, what's next?"

"We have one more mission to do." Jessie says while he and Dawn turn around to walk through the sewer before climbing out of it with the help of a ladder as they arrive back at the surface and notice that they are near the South Park Theater as the blue-haired boy walks over to press a nearby Fast Travel Flag, summoning Timmy as he then drove them all towards to Jimbos Guns and the lovebirds jumped off from the carriage as he drove off and the duo walked over to get inside of the store. "Hey, dude, we are finished with your quest." Jessie says while informing him of all of the animals that he had hunted as Jimbo perked up.

"Damn, kid, far as we're concerned, you are the best hunter there is and a hero as well."

"I have no words."

"You are probably the best hunter that this town as ever seen. Right up there with Ned and I in our prime. Right Ned?" Jimbo asked with a big proud, and impressed smile on his face as Ned nodded.

"Straight up." Ned says just as the blue-haired boy hears his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Jimbo and Ned have sent him a couple of Friend Requests as Jessie accepts them while putting away his phone and he and Dawn then sneaked away from them as, once they weren't looking, the blue-haired boy reached over to grab Dawn's hand and teleported them up to the raptors with the help of his Anal Probe and walked over to open up the chest that was sitting up there for days as Jessie found 5.00 Dollars, a Level 13 Axe of the Underworld, a Level 14 Grenade of Slowing, and a Level 11 White Whale Patch as the blue-haired boy was quick to equip the weapon with his Level 12 Frozen Maple Syrup Patch and then held out the weapon to Dawn.

"Oh, I told you, I'm not-,"

"You aren't but Heidi is. Besides, we are going to meet up with the Girls soon, so we would need our weapons and you should probably have Heidi take reins." Jessie says as Dawn sighed heavily and nodded while grabbing the weapon as they then held hands, and the blue-haired boy used his Anal Probe to warp them back down on the ground as they then went over to the Boys' and Girls' Changing Room as, a few minutes later, we see Jessie and Heidi walking out of the changing rooms while wearing their casual outfits as they then walked out of Jimbo's Guns.

"All right, Jess, let's go. You know the drill." Heidi says while reaching behind her to pull out a white cloth and wrap it around Jessie's eyes as she then begins leading him away, and after 20 minutes of walking and a lot of twists and turns, the blindfold is finally removed as the blue-haired boy blinks a couple of times and looked around curiously as he was standing back at the Pleases and Sparkles Club.

"Do you have the translated document, Jessie?" Wendy asked as Jessie nodded and handed her the translated document as everyone eagerly leaned over to read the document alongside Wendy. "See? Right here it says that five women were at the clinic that day,"

"And right there it says Layla Knitts 3:30 pm,"

"That's Annie's Mom." A glaring Red says as Bebe nods with an angry huff.

"See, I told you that Annie Knitts is the two-faced bitch!"

"The evidence is irrefutable. Jessie, we now know it was Annie Knitts all along who was spreading the rumors." Wendy says as Lola, Emily, and Bebe grow angry.

"FREAKIN WHORE!"

"TWO-FACED BUTT RAG!"

"FUCK ANNIE KNITTS IN HER FUCKING TWO-FACED ASS!"

"...But Annie is really sorry, so we're deciding to forgive her," Wendy says while pointing over at said girl as she beamed.

Sitting before them is a 4-feet-tall, 10-year-old girl with black eyes, short light blonde tight-curly blonde hair, blonde eyebrows, a small nose, a sharp chin, Caucasian Skin, a slender build, and her outfit consists of a long-sleeved brown collarless jacket long black pants, and a pair of black shoes. Her name is Annie Knitts, a member of the Pleases and Sparkles Club.

"I love you guys so much!"

"We love you too, Annie!" Bebe says with a cheerful as all of the girls cheered and praised Annie.

"...WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!" A furious Jessie screamed with his eyes and hair glowing blue as he trembled with rage. "THAT WAS IT?! THAT WAS IT?! AFTER EVERYTHING, YOU JUST FORGIVE HER JUST LIKE THAT?! I WAS ALMOST BEAT UP BY THE FIFTH GRADER! ATTACKED BY GOVERNMENT AGENTS AND NAZI ZOMBI FETUSES! AND HAD TO GO CANADA TO GET THAT FUCKING DOCUMENT TRANSLATED AND YOU JUST FORGIVE HER IN FIVE SECONDS! OOH, I WANT TO PUNCH ALL OF YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS-,"

"Hey, hey! Jessie, look at me! Look at me!" Heidi says while going over to cup Jessie's cheeks and turning his face towards her as she was trying to stop him from murdering the now scared and nervous girls. "It's okay! We got what we wanted! No need to get angry!"

"ARE YOU SERIOUS?! WHY WON'T I-," Jessie says before getting interrupted by Heidi closing her eyes and leaning over to kiss him, shocking the blue-haired boy as he moaned and kissed her back as his eyes and hair stopped glowing blue as the lovebirds then separated. "...You know what? That made everything worth it~," Jessie says with a sly grin while kissing Heidi again, causing her to squeal in surprise as she heard her sisters and the Pleases and Sparkles Club all cooing in delight.

"Okay, while you absolutely scared us to death, you and Heidi sharing your first kiss more than made up for that, you have our services, Jessie. Tell the boys we will play their game. Sparkle." Wendy says as she banged her gavel.

"Sunshine!" All of the girls exclaimed in unison just as the blue-haired boy heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Wendy, Bebe, and Red had sent him a couple of Friend Requests as Jessie accepts them while putting away his phone as Heidi turned to him.

"Alright, I will round up some new armor for us and weapons, so why don't you go around and get all of the girls friend requests?" Heidi suggested as Jessie nodded, and they separated as the blue-haired boy went over to a girl named Nelly.

"We should be friends, so you can like my posts."

"Uh, sure," Jessie says awkwardly as he then walked over to a girl named Jessie, and said person smiles at him.

"It's nice to meet someone with the same name as me."

"Same...wait...does that mean that my name is a girl's name?" Jessie thought to himself carefully before shrugging as he walked over to Monica, who beamed at him.

"Hey, I'm having a sleepover party at my house next Friday. You should come."

"Wait, wouldn't that mean that I will be the only boy there?"

"Are you complaining?"

"...You are right, I should shut up." A blushing Jessie says as Monica giggles and winks at him as he then walks back over to meet up with a girl named Allie Nelson.

"Thank you SO MUCH for clearing my name. Now, when girls call me a whore, it's more of a joking way." Allie says while kissing Jessie's cheek as he is surprised by this and blushes but nods as Jess then walks over to Annie.

"You're really different from the other boys. Like, you aren't even gross." Annie complimented as Jessie nodded just as the blue-haired boy heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Nelly, Jessie, Monica, Allie, and Annie had sent him a couple of Friend Requests as Jessie accepts them all while putting away his phone as Heidi runs up to him excitedly.

"Hey, Jessie, look at what I found," Heidi says while dragging him over to a chest as she opened it, and the lovebirds were able to see tons of stuff inside as they found a Level 13 Prenuptial Document Patch, a Level 13 Fairy Princess Blase, a Level 13 Fairy Princess Bow, and a Mouse-Tik Chinpokomon as Jessie grabbed the last one while Heidi grabbed the other stuff as well as two pieces of clothes.

"Well, while there is hardly anything for me, I'm happy that you were able to find an outfit and some weapons to use for the final weapon. Which outfit are you going to wear?" Jessie asked curiously as Heidi gave him a sly look.

"Let's try them on to see which fit~," Heidi says as an oblivious Jessie nods, and the duo goes over to the Girls' Bathroom as Heidi goes inside, and a few minutes later, the blue-haired boy spotted his crush coming out of the bathroom a Level 14 Valkyrie Headband, a Level 14 Valkyrie Armor, and a pair of Level 14 Valkyrie Gloves as, overall, the outfit was incredibly revealing and it caused Jessie to blush from head to toe as blood spurted out of his nose. "What do you think~?"

"Uh...uh...H-Heidi? You look...really great in that but...I would legit not be able to fight with you if you are dressed so...alluring..." A blushing Jessie says while being forced to sit down to hide some...things as Heidi noticed this and giggled as she winked.

"Okay," Heidi says while going back inside the Girls' Bathroom as Jessie breathed heavily and took several minutes to compose himself as he was able to finally stand up just as the door was opened as Heidi came out of the room while wearing a Level 14 Fairy Princess Tiara, a Level 14 Fairy Princess Robes, and a pair of Level 14 Fairy Princess Mittens. "Is this outfit better?"

"Yes, please...but I don't mind if you keep that outfit later and show it off to me again in my house." Jessie says with a suave and playful tone as Heidi blushes and punches his shoulder lightly as they share a laugh. "Anyway, when we get out of the South Park Park, let's head back to Kyle's House."

"Oh, yes, I...wait...you knew?! You knew that the Pleases and Sparkles Club was in the park this whole time?!"

"Yep, specifically in the Girl's Bathroom by pressing a secret compartment on the floor that has a set of stairs that lead to down to your underground club. I knew from the start. It's cute that you tried to blind me, but remember, beautiful, I have enhanced sense of smell and hearing." Jessie says with a wink as Heidi blushes in embarrassment and groans as she facepalmed just as the blue-haired boy heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Romper Stomper and Cartman's Doll, Polly Prissypants, had sent him two friend requests and had left a couple of messages saying, 'Hello, Douchebag. We must have tea sometime to celebrate Eric, our mutual hero' and 'Nice job stealing stuff, Kid. Your my idol' as Jessie rolled his eyes dryly but accepted both friend requests and noticed that Wendy had sent a message saying, 'Sleepover at Monica's House next Friday! If you can see this post, then you're invited! That includes you, Jessie! Don't tell anyone else about this post!' as Jessie blushed and smiled goofily, imagining seeing girls in their pajamas all night long as he then composed himself and put away his phones.

"Let's go, Jess." Heidi says as Jessie nods and the lovebirds make their way out of the Pleases and Sparkles Club as they arrive at the South Park Park, and make their way over to press a nearby Fast Travel Flag, summoning Timmy as he then drives them all towards Kyle's House and the gang jumped off from the carriage as he drove off and the lovebirds then made their way over to get into the Elven Kingdom as, immediately, everyone turned to Jessie and began applauding for him.

"Un, what's going on?" A curious Jessie asked as he noticed that Butters was currently missing.

"We have heard what happened earlier." Stan says while he and the others were staring at Jessie as if he was a great hero and continue applauding him with tears in their eyes as Eric stepped forward.

"We have found out that you have looked at Marjorie's breasts and we wanted to know...how did it look like?"

"Were they big and juicy, dude?" Princess Kenny asked eagerly with a perverted blush on his face as he had briefly broke character and took off his the hood of his parka.

"...Wait...you looked at who's boobies?!" A very angry Heidi asked as Jessie sweated nervously and laughed awkwardly as he then turned to Kyle.

"Anyway, we got the girls on our side." Jessie says with an anxious tone in his voice, trying to change the subject as it thankfully worked due to Kyle perking up and turning around to whistle loudly to get everyone's attention.

"Everyone listen up! The girls have agreed to fight by our side!" Kyle screamed with everyone cheering loudly as Stan got a text from his phone and beamed as he turned to his best friend.

"The Pirates and the Federation factions are standing by to fight as well, my Lord."

"Then the time for talk is over! Let us all make haste to Clyde's House!" The Grand Wizard screamed as everyone cheered again and made their way over to their tents to prepare for battle as the Grand Wizard and the High Jew Elf Kyle turned to Jessie. "Commander Douchebag, for you valiant efforts in helping us out, we decided to give you...this." Grand Wizard says as High Elf Jew King Kyle goes over to grab a chest from a nearby tent and hands it over to Jessie, who opens it as he gasps in awe at the sight of some new clothes.

"This is your outfit for the battle, Commander Jessie. You have earned it. We would've given some new clothes to Maiden Heidi as well, but she already got some new clothes."

"Thanks, guys, I really appreciate it." Jessie says while turning around to walk into the Changing Tent with the chest with Heidi waiting around for him as, five minutes later, she spotted her crush walking out of the Changing Tent while wearing his Silver Helmet, his 3D Glasses, two black stripes painted on each of his cheeks, a long blue cape with red accents as it was wrapped around his neck and reaches down to his legs, a Level 15 long-sleeved blue armored shirt with a pair of Level 15 red shoulder pads as they were equipped with his Level 14 Purple Heart Badge, a pair of Level 15 elbow-length red armored gauntlets that were equipped with his Level 13 Perenuptial Document that will allow him to leech 100 HP from his targets with each attack, a Level 15 brown belt with a golden belt buckle, a Level 15 long blue armored pants that was equipped with his Level 13 Superhero Patch, and a pair of Level 15 knee-length red armored boots as he carried around his Sweet Katana and his Level 14 Crossbrow of Impalement Weapon that he got back from Heidi earlier.

"Are you ready for this, Jessie?" Heidi asked as Jessie nodded seriously and turned over to her as he reached over to grab her hands.

"Heidi, I know that I have superpowers and you have your sisters to help you out, but I want to say that in case if we don't make it through it-,"

"We will."

"But if we don't, I want to say that you are the bravest, smartest, and kindest girl that I have ever met, and ever since I had moved into South Park, you were one of the greatest things that I have met, so I want to say that...I love you Heidi Turner and I want us to be boyfriend and girlfriend. Do you agree?" Jessie asked as Heidi blushed heavily and perked up as she gave him a watery smile.

"Oh, Jessie, I love you too. You are the strongest, nicest, and cutest boy that I have ever met, and I want to say that I will be happy to be your girlfriend, Jessie Gladstone." Heidi said as Jessie beamed and leaned over to kiss her passionately as she kissed him back before they separated as they smiled at each other warmly.

"Ready to save the universe, babe?"

"More than ever as long as I fight by your side," Heidi says with a blush as she and Jessie share another kiss as, unknown to them, Cartman, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Karen, Butters, and Jimmy were watching this in the background.

"Oh, gross!" Grand Wizard yelled with a disgusted tone as the High Jew Elf King rolled his eyes dryly.

"Don't be so immature, Wizard Fatass."

"Way to go, Jessie." A smiling Paladin Butters says as Ranger Stan and Jimmy the Bard nodded in agreement as they were both proud of their friend for getting a girlfriend.

"They are so cute together~," Prince Karen cooed as he then noticed that Princess Kenny sniffled and was shedding tears. "What's wrong?"

"N-Nothing. I'm going to leave Jessie Jr. with her Uncle Kevin for tonight." Princess Kenny sobbed while turning around to run away as he was crying at the fact that Heidi stole Jessie away from her.

---

"...Today, we are not elves and humans! Today...we FIGHT AS ONE!" Kyle screamed with a determined glare as we fast forward in time, and we see Commander Jessie and the others standing in front of Clyde's house, preparing to battle Clyde and his forces as Kyle and Grand Wizard Cartman were currently hyping up the crowd.

"What we do here now...will be written and sung about on YouTube for days to come! Let us besiege the army of darkness with the courage of dragons! Let us delve into their dungeon with swords and sorcery!"

"Let us charge our shields and use photon torpedoes to vaporize the Klingons!" Kevin yelled as everyone turned to glare at him.

"Wow, way to kill the fucking mood, Kevin." Commander Jessie says with a deadpan tone as Cartman groans and begins pinching the bridge of his nose as he takes deep breaths to calm himself down.

"Kevin...dammit. Every...fucking...time, Kevin. Fucking damn it, seriously."

"I'm sorry..." An apologetic Kevin says while hanging his head in shame as a nervous Heidi turns to Jessie.

"This is it. The final battle." A gulping Maiden Heidi says as Commander Jessie nods with a serious glare on his face.

"Yeah, if we don't win this war, it will be the end of South Park and probably the world."

"Yeah, no pressure." A blank-faced Maiden Heidi says as Jessie reaches over to grab her hand and kisses her cheek.

"Don't worry, girl, whatever happens, we will face it together," Commander Jessie says reassuringly as Heidi blushed warmly and nodded.

"Commander Douchebag, stop fucking your girlfriend. This is serious business."

"What? We are not-,"

"Armies of Justice! Prepare! Ready?! And...LET'S BEAT UP CLYDE!" Grand Wizard Cartman screamed while interrupting Commander Jessie as he then pointed his staff at Clyde's House, and everyone screamed loudly as Jessie and the others then ran forward as they made their way into Clyde's House, running past his shocked and confused father as they entered the backyard and the War of Zaron had occurred as they began fighting against each other.

"LET'S BRING IT ON!" Commander Jessie roared while planning to get into the fight, but then-

"Ow, I'm hit!" Wendy's voice rang out as Jessie turned his head and spotted Wendy kneeling on the floor as she held her knee that had a tear in her outfit and could be seen wearing her pinkish-magenta beret, a pink chest armor with a glowing red heart symbol planted in the middle, a pair of pink armored shoulder pads, long yellow armored pants, and a pair of black shoes.

"Wendy, are you okay?" Maiden Heidi asked worriedly as Wendy teared up.

"They-They tore my costume! I worked really hard on it!" Love Warrior Wendy yelled as she then turned to glare at the people fighting around her. "YOU SONS OF BITCHES ARE GONNA GET WHAT'S COMING TO YOU!"

"HOW DARE YOU RUIN WENDY'S OUTFIT?! IT WAS SO PERFECT AND CUTE!" A furious Maiden Heidi screamed as she angrily shook her fist at the people fighting near them.

"...Oh my god, I don't have time for this." A groaning Commander Jessie says while facepalming as he then turns to Butters. "Hey, dude, can you please go and heal this Drama Queen?"

"Your word is my command, my lord." Paladin Butters says while walking over to pat Wendy's shoulder as he was able to heal her with a burst of green light.

"Oh, thanks, Butters." A grateful Love Warrior Wendy says as the gang then walks forward and realizes that the bridge to Clyde's Castle is drawn up and blocked by the moat as two gargoyles with green cracks in them are keeping the drawbridge shut.

"Oh, great, how are we going to get into Clyde's Castle now?" Grand Wizard Cartman asked with a glare as Commander Jessie thought carefully just as he heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Terrance had left him a message saying, 'Remember: Nagasaki!' as Jessie groaned and put away his phone as he realized that he had no choice on what's going to happen next.

"Nagasaki!" Commander Jessie exclaimed while turning to aim his ass at the two gargoyle statues as he then held in a fart, and his asscheeks began juggling as the blue-haired boy then lets out a loud fart that exploded the two gargoyle statues into a billion pieces and caused the bridge to fall down to land in front of them.

"Oh, gross!" Love Warrior Wendy says while covering her nose as Heidi does the same.

"Trust me, if there were any other way that I could lower the bridge I would...without exposing my powers," Commander Jessie whispered the last part to Maiden Heidi, who frowned but nodded as the gang then walked up to the front gate and noticed that it was guarded by two guards as the blue-haired boy noticed a mouse hole planted on the side of Clyde's Castle. "Okay, here's the plan, we are going to separate into three teams. One team will storm the castle from the front while another group will storm the castle by scaling it from the outside, and the third team will be with me as we will storm into the castle by the back. Maiden Heidi? Love Warrior Wendy? You two are with me."

"Great job, Commander Jessie. Prince Karen, Paladin Butters, the Pirates, and I will scale up the castle from the outside." Ranger Stan says as High Jew Elf King Kyle nodded.

"While Grand Wizard Cartman, Princess Kenny, Jimmy the Bard, and I will storm the castle from the front." Kyle says as everyone nods and separates to do their respective jobs.

"Come on, guys, we better find Smuggler Mapplebeard the Pirate King," Stan says to Prince Karen and Paladin Butters, who nodded as they turned around to leave and go and find Ike.

"Alright, Princess Kenny and Jimmy the Bard, entrance the guards and I will take them out." Grand Wizard Cartman says as the duo nods, and Princess Kenny steps forward as she uses her Charm Ability to reach up and pull down her dress shirt, revealing her 'breasts' to one of the Castle Guards, who was mesmerized by the sight of the glorious orbs in front of him as he gained hearts in his eyes.

"Oh, wow! Boobies!" One of the Castle Guards says while drooling as Jimmy the Bard steps forward and reaches behind him to pull out his ukelele and activate his Lullabye Move as he starts strumming his instrument.

"Close your eyes, no more thinking...thinking about the troubles, sleep now with Jesus..for you are blessed~," Jimmy sang, causing the Second Castle Guard to go sleepy as he groaned and struggled to stay awake as Grand Wizard Cartman stepped forward.

"Cocksucker...asshole...bitch...lolicon clit sucker...son of a whore...lesbian cunt...Walt Disney!" Cartman exclaimed, and his body was covered with white electricity as he fired multiple bolts of electricity that collided against the Castle Guards, electrifying them as they got knocked out and the trio then walked forward as Grand Wizard Cartman reached over to open the Castle Doors, and flinched in surprise as he spotted a bunch of Clyde's Warriors standing around. "This is going to be a bit more complicated than I thought..."

"Over here," Commander Jessie says while leading the girls over to the back of Clyde's Castle as he spots a backpack placed near the mouse hole and goes over to open it to see that there are 75 Cents, a Health Potion (Small), a Power Potion (Large), a Cure Potion, and a Brutish Wig as he pocketed them all.

"So, how are we going to get inside of the castle again?" Love Warrior Wendy asked as Heidi grinned slyly.

"Just watch and be amazed," Maiden Heidi says as Commander Jessie reaches into his Magic Pouch and pulls out a handful of yellow dust as he throws it over them, and the trio instantly shrinks down in size magically.

"Whoa, cool!" An amazed Love Warrior Wendy says as the lovebirds laughed before going over to get inside the mouse hole as they were shocked to see an Underpants Gnome fighting against a bunch of Nazi Zombie Rats. "Don't worry, I got this." Wendy says while reaching behind her to grab her love bow as she aimed it at the Nazi Zombie Rats. "Love Shower!" Love Warrior Wendy shouted while firing a bunch of love arrows that went over to pierce through a group of Nazi Zombies Rats, killing them as the remaining Nazi Zombie Rats turned to glare at her angrily. "Love Hurts!" Love Warrior Wendy screamed while reaching into her utility belt to pull out a bunch of heart shurikens and tossed them over to collide against several Nazi Zombie Rat's heads to kill them as the remaining Nazi Zombie Rats rushed over to try and kill her. "Feel the Love, Motherfuckers!" Love Warrior Wendy yelled while cupping her hands around her heart, and her chest gained a glowing red energy heart as she then multiple large glowing red energy hearts that washed over the Nazi Zombie Rats and vaporized them from existence.

"Wow, nice, job, Love Warrior Wendy." Commander Jessie says as Love Warrior Wendy winked at him and watched on as he walked over to go through the Nazi Zombie Rat's bodies while the Underpants Gnome turned around to run away as the blue-haired boy was able to find 75 Cents, a Health Potion (Large), and a Level 13 Dairy Council Patch, which will allow him to gain 5 PP each turn as he equipped it to his shirt and the kids then turned around to walk over to a nearby pipe as they climbed up it and were able to arrive at the first floor of Clyde's Castle as the trio looked around and spotted tons of Clyde's Warriors standing in front of them with another group of Clyde Warriors standing on the other side of the room as they also noticed that there was a third group of Clyde Warriors standing on the second floor and were handling firework launchers. "Okay, here's the plan. I will handle these guys while Maiden Heidi handles the guys up top and Love Warrior Wendy distracts the warriors standing on the other side of the room." Commander Jessie instructed while reaching into his Magic Pouch and pulling out a handful of yellow dust as he threw it over them, and the group instantly grew back to their usual sizes magically.

"Agreed." Maiden Heidi says while raising her boy and firing an arrow that went over to zoom past the firework launchers, setting them off prematurely and causing a huge explosion to occur that took out Clyde Warriors from the second floor, alerting Clyde Warriors who were standing in front of them as they whirled around to face them.

"Horn of Irritation!" A smirking Commander Jessie says while activating his Horn of Irritation Move and reaches behind him to pull out his Airhorn as he then presses it and sends out a loud horn sound as a big soundwave blast impacted against Clyde's Warriors, causing them all to shriek in extreme pain and agony. "Assault and Battery!" Jessie yelled while activating his Assault and Battery Move as he pulled out his metal bat and baseball as Jessie then tossed the ball into the air and was quick to use his Super Strength to whack the baseball forward as it flew over to collide with several of Clyde Warrior's heads, knocking them out as they crashed down into the ground and the remaining Clyde Warriors were planning to bust down the barrier to face them, but then-

"Love Spell!" Love Warrior Wendy exclaimed while firing multiple love arrows over to collide against Clyde Warriors' chests, causing them to gain hearty eyes and fall in love with each other as they began making out. "Guys! Now!" Love Warrior Wendy yelled just as the castle doors were burst down, and the gang stormed into the castle as Kyle summoned his Windstorm Move.

"I summon the winds!" Kyle ordered while reaching behind him to pull out his lawn blower as he activated it, and it fired out a huge gust of winds that blew away all of Clyde Warriors as they were all sent flying over to crash against the wall and got knocked out.

"Good job everyone." Commander Jessie praised as everyone smirked and nodded while making their way upstairs with the help of a nearby ladder as the blue-haired boy then walked over to explore the place and found a nearby chest as he opened it to see 60 Cents, a Terrance and Phillip Action Figures, a Mana Potion, a Level 13 Lawn Dart, and a couple of new patches as Jessie had equipped his shirt with the Level 14 Jewpacabra Claw, which reduces target's armor by 100 on Perfect Attack as he then equipped his gloves with a Level 13 Berserker Patch, which allows him to gain an Attack Up at the start of combat as Jessie then turned around to climb up the ladders to meet up with his allies just as a bunch of ropes appeared by the windows as they spotted Ranger Stan, Prince Karen, Paladin Butters, the Pirate King, and the Pirates climbing up it.

"Nice job, Commander Jessie! See you at the top!"

"Stan, can we go and see the movies next Wednesday?"

"Sure, babe!" Ranger Stan says as he continued climbing up the ladder, and Commander Jessie went over to loot the 'corspes' of Clyde Warriors and found some Level 15 Knight Gloves as he puts them on and equipped his Level 13 Berserker Patch on them as the gang then climbed up to the third floor of Clyde's Castle and noticed several Nazi Zombie Kids, Nazi Zombies Adults, Nazi Zombies Cows, and Nazi Zombies Cats stalking around as they all growled.

"Holy shit! Is that what this green goo does to people and animals?!" A shocked Love Warrior Wendy asked as Jimmy the Bard nodded.

"Yeah, it's f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-fucked up, isn't it?"

"Mmm mmm mmm mm mm mm mmm mm mm mm mmm mm mm mm (We need to all work together in order to defeat all of these Nazi Zombies)," Princess Kenny says as Commander Jessie nodded.

"Yeah, so everybody, let's work together to deal with these Nazi Zombies." A determined Commander Jessie says as everyone nods. "Grooooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnndddddddddddddddddd...Stomp!" Commander Jessie screamed while activating his Ground Stomp Move as he then crouched down and jumped into the air as he swiftly crashed on top of several Nazi Zombie Kids, creating a big shockwave that exploded them all into a billion of bloody guts as Maiden Heidi fired several arrows that pierced through the heads of the remaining Nazi Zombies Kids to kill them.

"Love Shower!" Love Warrior Wendy shouted while firing a bunch of love arrows that went over to pierce through a group of Nazi Zombie Adults, killing them.

"Flame Strike!" Grand Wizard Cartman yelled while activating his Flame Strike Move as he reached behind him to pull out a lighter and a hairspray with a sinister grin on his face as he joined them together to fire a big stream of flames that washed over the Nazi Zombie Cats to incinerate them into ashes.

"Mmmmm Mmmmm! (Furry Friends!)," Princess Kenny says while activating her Furry Friends Move as she starts singing elegantly and attracts all of the Rats in Clyde's Castle and ordered them to attack the Nazi Zombie cows as they ran over to begin eating them alive.

"Rain of Arrows!" The High Elf Jew King Kyle exclaimed while activating his Rain of Arrows Move as he held up his club. "Ready...aim...fire!" Kyle screamed as a bunch of hidden Drow Elves fired multiple red arrows at the remaining Nazi Zombie Cows and Cats, killing them.

"Brown Note!" Jimmy The Bard said while activating his Brown Note Supermove as everyone quickly covered up their ears and watched on as Jimmy pulled out his flute and proceeded to play the brown note, causing all of the yelping Nazi Zombie Adults and Nazi Zombies Kids to lose control of their bowels and begin screaming in pain as they all started literally shitting themselves to death.

"Alright, let's go." Commander Jessie says while he and the others walk up to the ladder, which was broken in half as he then turns to the others. "Everyone grabbed hold of me." Commander Jessie ordered as they grabbed onto him, and used his Anal Probe to teleport them all to the fourth floor and they found themselves on the balconies outside the fourth floor as Ranger Stan climbed onto the one above them.

"All right, here's the plan! Attack each tower and raise the gate so we can get into Clyde's Lair! Maplebeard! Clear the path!" Ranger Stan ordered the Pirate King, who climbed up the rope ladder and jumped up and down excitedly.

"Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!" The Pirate King says while reaching behind him to pull out a firework and a lighter, but before he could light the firework, one of Clyde's Warriors appeared and went over to kick him in the face.

"FUCK YOU!"

"Ike!" Kyle cried out worriedly while running over to give his Adoptive Brother a comforting hug as a glaring Jessie stomped forward and reached over to grab the firework while setting off after briefly coating his hand with blue electricity as he then went over to shove the firework up Clyde's Warrior's ass.

"Let's fire things up, asshole!" Jessie screamed just as the firework rang off as it caused the screaming Clyde Warrior to be flown into the air and crash down to the ground as a sniffling Ike spotted this and cheered gleefully.

"Are you okay, Ike?" Jessie asked as Ike babbled happily.

"Thanks for the help, dude." A grateful High Jew Elf King Kyle says as Jessie nodded just as he heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Ike had sent him a Friend Request and accepted it as the blue-haired boy then put away his phone.

"You're welcome. Anyway, here's the plan. Princess Kenny, Warrior Wendy, and I will deal with the left tower while Maiden Heidi, Grand Wizard Cartman, and Jimmy the Bard deal with the right tower." Commander Jessie instructed as everyone nodded and separated.

"Alright, guys, do your thing." Maiden Heidi commanded while firing an arrow that flew over to collide against a lamp placed on top of the left tower, breaking it apart as the boys nodded and Jimmy the Bard reached behind him to pull out his ukelele as the Disabled Boy then strummed a power cord, raising both his and Cartman's PP to their maximum.

"Song of Buffness!" Jimmy the Bard exclaimed while activating his Song of Buffness Supermove as he began strumming his ukelele. "And now for my next trick...there was once a maiden from S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-Stonebury Hollow. She didn't talk much, but damn did she s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-swallow. I have a nice lance that she s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sat upon, the maiden from Stoneburry...who was also your Mom~," Jimmy sang while strumming his ukelele as he not only lowered his enemies defenses and guard but also increased his and Cartman's strength as said person then activated his Burning Cloud Move.

"Burning Cloud!" Grand Wizard Cartman screamed while turning around and pulling down his pants as Eric placed his lighter in front of his ass and let out a big fart that collided against the broken lamp, creating a huge explosion that destroyed the left tower and sent all of Clyde Warriors flying away as Maiden Heidi then walked over to grab onto the wheel.

"Mmmm Mmmm! (Royal Kiss!)," Princess Kenny shouted while using a more sultry and seductive tone as she activated her Royal Kiss Supermove and walked over to one of Clyde Warriors as Princess Kenny leaned over to plant a kiss on the cheek, catching Clyde Warrior completely off guard as he grew sick and vomited on the ground as Kenny was quick to raise her bow and slammed it against the back of his head, knocking him out as he crashed down into the ground.

"Love Spell!" Love Warrior Wendy yelled while firing multiple love arrows over to collide against Clyde Warriors' chests, causing them to gain hearty eyes and fall in love with each other as they began making out.

"Bull Rush!" Commander Jessie exclaimed while activating her Bull Rush Supermove as he then put on his football helmet, and bent down, and skidded his feet on the ground repeatedly before charging forward as he collided against the right tower, destroying it and sending the remaining Clyde Warriors flying away as the blue-haired boy then began looting their chest to find a Shoe Chinpokomon, a Revive Potion, a Power Potion, and a Level 14 Shard of the Dark Lord's Crown, which will allow him to ignore up to 400 Armor and was quick to equip it to his Sweet Katana as the blue-haired boy then heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Jimbo had sent a message saying, 'Got another hunting trip coming up in a few weeks, and you're welcome to come along. Ask your folks, it'll be fun! Live Grenades', and Jessie responded, 'I would love to go and I will ask my parents when I come back home' as he then put away his phone and went over to the wheel as he and Heidi worked together to draw up the doors that leads into Clyde's Lair as the group then went over to meet up with each other.

"Alright, let's go in." Ranger Stan says as he, Prince Karen, Paladin Butters, and Commander Douchebag walked into the room just as the doors behind them were closed up as they spotted Craid the Thief, and Tweek the Warrior as they held hands.

"We are going to defeat you, you traitors!"

"We had no choice but to join Clyde, guys." Craig the Thief says with a somber tone as Tweek the Warrior nods nervously and points over at a cage that holds their endangered Geniue Pig Stripe.

"If we don't do as he says, Clyde is going to kill Stripe!"

"Oh, that's horrible!" A stunned Paladin Butters says with Prince Karen covering his mouth in shock, and even Ranger Stan looks shocked by this as a determined Jessie narrowed his eyes.

"Don't worry, guys, we will help you out!" Commander Jessie yelled while looking around and noticed Three of Clyde Warriors holding up three cages that held a bunch of Nazi Zombie Cows, and said cages were connected to Stripe, which means that if the cages are lowered then Stripes will be saved as Jessie got an idea. "Guys! Take out the cages!" Commander Jessie ordered as everyone nodded.

"Hammer of Justice!" Butters screamed while activating his Hammer of Justice Supermove and spun around for a bit as he threw his hammer at one of Clyde Warrior's face, knocking him out as he accidentally dropped the rope that held the cage of the Nazi Zombie Cow as it fell down into the ground.

"Excelsior!" Prince Karen shouted while raising his toy sword and activating his Excelsior Supermove as it let out a huge flash of bright white light that blinded the second Clyde Warrior, causing him to yelp in pain and let go of the rope as he stumbled backwards and crashed down into the ground as the cage of the Nazi Zombie Cow fell down into the ground.

"Discus of Might!" Ranger Stan yelled while activating his Discus of Might Move as he pulled out a metal disc and held out his arms as Stan started spinning around rapidly before throwing his disc forward as it flew over to collide against the remaining Cylde Warrior, knocking him out as the cage of the Nazi Zombie Cow fell down into the ground and it caused the cage containing Stripe to be lowered as Jessie walked over to grab it and opened it to free Stripe as he and the others then made their way over to Craig and Tweek.

"Here's your pet, dude," Jessie says while handing Stripe over to Craig and Tweek, who beamed as they smiled at him.

"Thanks for helping out Stripe, Jess."

"You're welcome," Jessie says with a nod and a smirk as he then grows serious. "Now, let's go and beat up Clyde."

"Yeah, but first, here's a present for you, dude," Craig says while gesturing over at a door that leads to another room as Jessie raises an eyebrow oddly but walks over to get inside the room, which shows a chest as he opens it and sees a Level 15 Knight Armor as Jessie perks up and eagerly put it on as he then dyed it blue/red with a long blue cape that reaches down to his leg as the blue-haired boy equipped it with his Level 13 Dairy Council Patch and then walked out of the room as Heidi whistled while Craig and Tweek turned around to leave Clyde's Castle to deal with the fight outside.

"Nice armor, babe." Maiden Heidi praised as Jessie grinned and nodded before everyone grew serious as they all climbed up the stairs and arrived at the fifth floor of Clyde's Castle as the gang was shocked to see Randy standing before them while wearing a blue scarf, no shirt, blue shorts, a pair of brown cowboy boots, and held a sword and a shield.

"Dad? What the hell are you doing here?" A surprised Ranger Stan asked as Randy perked up and smiled happily at the sight of the kids.

"Oh! It's my favorite kid!" Randy says while walking right past Ranger Stand as he got down on one knee in front of Commander Jessie, who winced and gave Stan an apologetic look as he shrugged it off. "Listen! I found out what they were doing at the women's clinic! They were looking for a candidate to put a snuke into! They're going to nuke all of South Park!"

"Oh, shit, this just got even more serious." A worried Commander Jessie says as the High Jew Elf King does a double take in shock.

"A snuke?!"

"You boys don't understand. They've put the snuke here,"

"Who did? The people who were claming to be Taco Bell?" Maiden Heidi asked as Randy nodded.

"Yeah, I can't believe that I'm saying it, but Jessie and Heidi were right. Those people weren't from Taco Bell. They were Government Agents."

"We fucking told you!" Commander Jessie and Maiden Heidi exclaimed in unison while giving him smug grins as a somber and distraught Randy sighed heavily as he lowered his head.

"We should've known. We should've known Taco Bell is far too compassionate and caring to be secretive. The quality of their character, like the quality of their food, should have never come into question."

"Didn't we see on the news about a pack of rats living around in Taco Bell for seemingly years on end?" Prince Karen asked Princess Kenny, who nodded as Paladin Butters whimpered nervously.

"Oh, hamburgers, this is getting serious."

"Babe, you know these Governtment Agents well enough. Do you think that they are crazy enough to actually nuke the entire town?" Maiden Heidi asked as Jessie nodded.

"Oh, definitely. I'm powerful enough to survive a nuke and they know that, which is why don't care if they blow up a city, even with me inside. I guess they got desperate enough to finally pull off a crazy stunt like this."

"Dad, where is the woman with the snuke?!" Ranger Stan asked as Randy turned to him ominously.

"They didn't put it in a woman..." Randy says as we fast forward in time and we see the gang standing in another group with a tied-up Mr. Slave standing before them as Jessie and Stan covered their girlfriend's eyes as the others made sure to only look up at Mr. Slave's face instead of his dick and balls. "Mr. Slave, can you tell us what happened with the snuke?"

"Well, all I remember is that there were these big government guys, and they wrestled me to the floor at my house. And then I remember thinking, 'Well this is fun, but wait, is that a thermonuclear device?'. I'd had some drinks, so putting a thermonuclear device up my ass wasn't COMPLETELY out of the question,"

"Dude, you DO realize that if that snuke goes off, you will explode and all of South Park will die, right?" A deadpan Commander Jessie asked as Mr. Slave grew worried by this and paled.

"Oh, Jesus Christ, how long do I have?!" Mr. Slave said.

"We don't know, Mr. Slave, but it could be a matter of minutes," Maiden Heidi says as Mr. Slave hurriedly aimed his ass at the group.

"Well, what are you waiting for? PULL IT OUT!" Mr. Slave demanded as everyone exchanged looks, and the Grand Wizard Cartman extended his hand as a concerned High Jew Elf King Kyle slapped his hand away.

"No! We can't just pull it out!"

"Kyle's right. Snukes have triggers on them." Love Warrior Wendy says as Princess Kenny nods.

"Mmmm, mmmm mmmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm (Yeah, we have to abort it from inside, dude),"

"But who knows how to do abortions AND can get really really small?" Prince Karen asked as everyone then froze and slowly turned over to Commander Jessie, who put two and two together as he frowned.

"Oh, hell no,"

"Jessie-,"

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! I've done a lot of things since I got into South Park! I had to learn Fart Magic, I fought with the government, became Goth, dealt with Perverted Gnomes, saw my parents have sex with each other, dressed up as a girl, fought against Nazi Zombie Babies, and went to Canada, but I REFUSED to go inside of a man's ass!" Jessie yelled stubbornly as Heidi separated from him and grabbed onto his hand as she led him away.

"Baby, please listen to reason, if we don't deactivate that snuke, all of South Park will be blown up!"

"Then let it be blown up because I REFUSED to get inside of Mr. Slave's ass! I'm Facebook Friends with him! I know what goes up his asshole!" Jessie screamed defiantly as Heidi grabbed his hands and gave him a pleading look.

"Please, Jessie, I know that this is the most horrible and disgusting thing that you have to do in this city, but it has to be done to save all of South Park! And if you do this, I will-,"

"Oh, I'm sorry, Heidi, but a kiss isn't enough to change my-," Jessie says before getting caught off by Heidi leaning over to whisper what she will do to him if he does this task as his eyes widened in pure awe and shock. "...Wait, what?" A stunned Jessie asked with a blush as Heidi nodded urgently.

"If you go up, Mr. Slave's asshole, deactivate the snuke, and if we survive against Clyde and his Forcers, I promise you that I will do it. I swear on my parents life that I would."

"...No takebacks?"

"Nope."

"...You won't try and trick me by saying that you will show me your kitty cat instead?"

"I'm more of a dog person, honestly.

"...Panties off?"

"Panties off."

"...Your sisters won't beat me up if I see it, right?"

"I will command them to not appear while we are doing our deal."

"...Can I touch it?"

"Well, since you ARE going up a gay man's asshole to save all of our lives, then yes, I will allow you to touch it." Heidi says sincerely with a nod as Jessie blinked a bit and turned his head to glance over at Mr. Slave's ass before turning back to a hopeful Heidi as he did this repeatedly and then sighed heavily while gripping his blue hair as the blue-haired boy groaned.

"Ugh...fine! Fine, I will do it, but you owe me this, Heidi! If you back down, I will be mega pissed!" Jessie yelled firmly as Heidi smiled and nodded as she kissed him.

"Don't worry, I always deliver with my promises~," Heidi says with a wink as Jessie blushed and sighed heavily as he nodded.

"Okay, then, I'm going up, Mr. Slave's ass." Jessie says with everyone cheering loudly as he walks over to appear behind Mr. Slave. "If any of you say what I do here, I promise that I will kick all of your asses." Jessie threatened Wendy and the others as they paled nervously and nodded as the blue-haired boy then turned to Mr. Slave's ass and took a deep breath as Heidi went over to kiss him.

"Don't worry, you can do this, baby, just remember about the prize that you will get later when we survive this~," Heidi says while kissing Jessie passionately as they then separate, and the blue-haired boy nods.

"Okay, okay, I can do this. I can do this." Jessie says while reaching into his Magic Pouch and pulling out a handful of yellow dust as he throws it over him, and instantly shrinks down in size magically as Paladin Butters walks over to bend down and grab him.

"Let me help you out here, Little Buddy."

"Butters, you are a saint," Jessie says while coating himself in a blue electrical aura as he sighs in relief. "There, now with this energy airtight forcefield around myself, it will help keep any disease or gems from touching me and I won't have to touch anything disgusting inside of Mr. Slave's asshole." Jessie thought to himself while taking a deep breath and closing his eyes as an oblivious Paladin Butters proceeds to shove him inside of Mr. Slave's asshole. "I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS!"

"Oh, be careful. I might have also put some bats up there the other night..."

"YOU ARE A DISGUSTING HUMAN CREATURE! THAT'S ANIMAL ABUSE, MOTHERFUCKER! DON'T SHOVE ALIVE ANIMALS UP YOUR ASSHOLE!" Jessie snapped furiously just as he got inside Mr. Slave's asshole as the sphincter closed behind him. "I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS! I HATE THIS!" Jessie screamed while floating up into the air as, much to his shock, the spirit of a Frog appeared before him and said person wore an orange glowing crown, a golden scepter, and a long purple cape. His name is the Frog King.

"New Kid, I am the Frog King. You must find a way out of this place or you will surely die. The way behind you is blocked by the large sphincter. Make haste to the large intestine. All will be made clear to you then." The Frog King says while disappearing from sight as Jessie blinks slowly and facepalmed as he sighs heavily.

"I fucking hate South Park," Jessie says with a groan while floating forward as he made his way through Mr. Slave's bowels and used his electrical powers to blow up globs of semen, condoms, vibrators, and even Mutant Bacteria as Jessie flew upwards and made sure to avoid a half-eaten corn on the cob that was covered with shit. "I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this." Jessie mumbled under his breath while trying to ignore how bad it smells inside of Mr. Slave's asshole as there was a small device placed before him that was shorting out electricity, but the blue-haired boy merely went through it harmlessly as he arrived at an area of the bowel that looked infected and the blue-haired boy shuddered in disgust as he tried to remember what Heidi promised him after this whole mess is over and blushed heavily at the thought of seeing his girlfriend's precious flower and floated ahead to see a large pool ball placed before him.

"Nagasaki!" Commander Jessie exclaimed while turning to aim his ass at the pool ball as he then held in a fart, and his asscheeks began juggling as the blue-haired boy then lets out a loud fart that exploded the pool ball into a billion pieces and floated forward to find a phone as it began ringing due to Big Gay Al calling him, and it caused Mr. Slave to moan in pleasure as Jessie reluctantly answered it.

"Hello, Slave honey? Where are you? You better not be tied up somewhere, you silly goose."

"Uh, hello? This is Jessie Gladstone."

"Oh, Jessie, yes, my husband told me about you. Why do you have Mr. Slave's phone?"

"He lost it up his asshole,"

"Oh, that explains it...but wait, then how are you answering it?"

"...You don't wanna know," Jessie says with a traumatized look on his face as he hangs up the call and mentally agreed to himself that this is easily the most traumatic event that he went through in South Park with seeing his parents having sex and attacking Nazi Zombie Fetuses a close second and third as he heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Big Gay All had sent him a Friend Request and accepted it as the blue-haired boy then put away his phone and floated upwards as he noticed a mountain of shit covering a flashlight and floated up it while making sure to NOT touch the mountain of feces as he tried to turn on the flashlight, only to realize that it was out of power as Jessie merely covered it with his blue electricity, turning it on and it caused a sleeping bat to wake up and shriek loudly as he flew out of Mr. Slave's Asshole.

"Well, at least he's still alive." Jessie says with a big sweatdrop and a shrug as he then perked up at the sight of a chest and goes over to open it to see a Level 12 Ghost Peper Patch, which will have his fire damage increased by 25% as he equipped it to his gloves and noticed a Level 13 Condom Cap lying inside but bluntly ignored it and flew up past a string of anal beads as a ghostly bird with a silver crown and a long blue cape appeared in front of him.

"I am the Sparrow Prince,"

"...Why do I have a feeling that all of you are spirits of the animals who Mr. Slave had shoved up his ass and died?" A blank-faced Jessie asked as the Sparrow Prince nodded.

"Because you are right. You see, like you, I was once used for pleasure as an anal plaything, and thus perished in this place. Now you must defeat my angry spirit in order to move forward. I know, I don't really sound that angry, but trust me, I am,"

"Hey, this isn't fair, you are a spirit and twice my size." A glaring Jessie says as the Sparrow Prince hums and shrinks down to match his height as he turns himself tangible.

"Very well, then, is this more fair to-,

"Electrifying Stun Dome!" Jessie exclaimed with his eyes and hair glowing blue as he flew down through the air and raised his arm as he proceeded to slam his clenched fist onto the organic ground underneath him, creating a huge sparkling blue energy dome around him that expanded as it impacted against the Sparrow Prince, not only electrocuting him but also sapped him of his energy as he crashed down onto the ground and groaned in pain.

"Ugh...well, done...New Kid...you tricked me into lowering my guard to finish...me off...with one attack...you have proven yourself...in combat...young anal plaything..."

"Don't call me that, dude. Just call me Dragonborn." Jessie says with a deadpan look while floating upwards as the Sparrow Prince recovers enough of his remaining energy to grow himself back to his usual size and turn himself tangible.

"Understood. Anyway, go and find the snuke's trigger and save the outside world. Farethee met and farethee well, Dragonborn" Sparrow Prince says while fading away as Jessie shakes his head and flies forward as he was able to find a large grey vibrator with the words, 'Cartman's Mom Vibrator' written on it and the blue-haired boy shakes his head as he flew down and arrived at the colon as Jessie was shocked to see two Government Agents standing before him as one of them sighed in annoyance.

"I didn't join the company for this,"

"Yeah, but how come we always get the shit jobs? Go clean out the barracks, go round up civilians, go up a gay man's butthole and guard against intruders. Fuckin' sucks." One of the Government Agents says with a glare as Sparrow Prince and Frog King appear on either side of Jessie.

"Armed guards? What are they doing here?" Frog King asked confusedly as the Sparrow Prince hummed with a glare.

"Whoever seeks to blow up the town clearly doesn't want anyone stopping them,"

"How in the fuck did they shrink? Did they find the Underpants Gnomes? Or use some sort of technology to shrink?" A bewildered Commander Jessie asked, getting the Government Agents' attention as they aimed their weapons at them.

"Freeze!"

"You must get past them, Dragonborn. Go fuck 'em up," Frog King says as he and Sparrow Prince disappeared from sight.

"Yeah, I don't have time for this." A blank-faced Jessie says as he then grows serious. "Dual Lightning Fists!" Jessie exclaimed while throwing dual punches into the air as he fired two bolts of blue lighting that were in the shape of two clenched fists, and they flew over to burst through the Government Agents's chest, killing them as they crashed down into the ground and the blue-haired boy then flew up into the stomach with his energy airtight blue forcefield protecting him from getting burned by the stomach acid and resurfaced as Jessie spotted the snuke floating around in the stomach acid. "WAIT A MINUTE?! THE SNUKE WAS IN HIS STOMACH THIS WHOLE TIME?! WHICH MEANS THAT I COULD'VE GONE THROUGH THE MOUTH INSTEAD! FUCK!" Jessie cursed furiously with his eyes and hair glowing a bright blue in his anger as a ghostly catfish with golden armor appeared floating beside him.

"Hello, Draginborn, I...am Catatafish. The trigger of the thermonuclear device lies before you. I have tried to solve its riddle, but I have been unable to disarm it. There are only moments to spare. Find a way to disengage the trigger, or all will be lost," The Catatafish says as Jessie flew over to the snuke and realized that it had a realistic vagina and legs as he was about to try and abort the snuke...but then paused a bit as he realized something.

"Wait, I don't actually know how to abort things. I just killed those Government Guys...eh, fuck it! Yolo!" Jessie screamed while shoving his fist into the vagina, causing the snuke to yelp in surprise and moan as he covered his fist with blue electricity, and it traveled across the snuke, miraculously deactivating it as the snuke moaned.

"Self-destruction sequence aborted,"

"Thank god, I'm getting the fuck out of here," Jessie says while glancing upwards as he then took off high into the air at high speeds, and we cue to the outside as Mr. Slave began coughing loudly.

"What is it, Mr. Slave? What are you feeling?" Randy asked as Mr. Slave continued coughing until Jessie flew out of his mouth and landed down on the ground.

"Oh, thank fucking god that's over." A groaning Jessie says while deactivating her forcefield as he was happy to see that he was completely clean and didn't smell like semen and feces as Frog King, the Sparrow Prince, and the Catatafish appeared before him.

"Great job, Dragonborn."

"But your journey is not yet complete."

"Yes, but should we ever need your services again, we will call." Catatafish, Sparrow Prince, and Frog King says while hanging him a Level 15 Crown of Anal Pleasure as Jessie puts it on, and the ghostly animals disappeared as Jessie heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that Catatafish, Sparrow Prince, and Frog King had sent him friend requests as the blue-haired boy had accepted all of them and noticed that Polly Prissypants had sent him a message saying, 'That Eric Cartman is truly the perfect gentlemen and has a bigger penis than you, Douchebag' as an annoyed Jessie put away his phone and then equipped his crown with a Level 14 Tactical Armor Pad Patch and equipped his cape with a Level 13 Brown Badge of Courage Patch as Heidi's Boyfriend reached into his Magic Pouch and pulled out a handful of yellow dust as he threw it over him, and instantly grew back to his usual size magically.

"Great job! You disarmed the snuke! South Park is saved!" Randy praised as Maiden Heidi went over to kiss Jessie.

"You did it, baby!"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm great and all but can we please get this over with?" Commander Jessie asked impatiently as Grand Wizard Cartman nodded.

"Yes, let's finish this, Commander Douchebag! Let's beat Clyde once and for all, and take back the Stick of Truth!"

"And save all of South Park from turning into Nazi Zombies." Love Warrior Wendy added as Grand Wizard Cartman rolled his eyes dryly, and Jessie and the others turned around to walk out of the room as they made their way over to get inside Clyde's Throne Room and spotted him holding the Stick of Truth as he stood next to a barrel of hazardous waste with multiple tubes that were connected to a closed casket.

"Fools! You thought you could conquer the Fortress of Darkness?!"

"Clyde! Back away from that stuff!" Ranger Stan ordered as Clyde smirked evilly.

"Oh, but I have yet to complete my army! You have come to witness the power of darkness!"

"Stop, Clyde! You have no idea what that stuff is!" The High Jew Elf King warned as Clyde rolled his eyes and scoffed.

"Yeah huh, it's green sauce from Taco Bell. I took it from their construction site," Clyde says as Princess Kenny shakes her head.

"Mmmm, mmmm'mm mmm Mmmm Mmm Mmmm (Dude, that's not Taco Bell Sauce),"

"Then why'd I find it at the Taco Bell?"

"That was a government site, you moron! That green stuff leaked out of a fucking UFO! It's toxic goo from another galaxy!" Commander Jessie snapped furiously as Grand Wizard Cartman nodded in agreement,

"Yeah, think about it, Clyde, since when does Taco Bell have a green sauce, dude?"

"Actually, since about a year ago," Maiden Heidi says as Cartman blinked slowly and turned to her.

"What?"

"Yeah, Heidi is right. Taco Bell has green sauce now. Our parents took us there a week ago." Prince Karen as Love Warrior Wendy stepped forward.

"They've actually had it longer than a year. I've always gotten spicy green burritos with Stan."

"Actually, fellas, I think what Heidi is trying to say is that they just started putting green sauce in packets," Paladin Butters says as Jimmy the Bard nods.

"Y-Y-Yeah, it's pretty common knowledge, dude."

"The fuck?! How the fuck did I miss this?!" An enraged and disbelieving Grand Wizard Cartman asked as Clyde laughed mockingly.

"HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA! I DON'T SEEM SO FOOLISH NOW, DO I?!"

"Yes, you do, dipfuck. Anyway, even if Cartman is wrong, it doesn't mean that you have Taco Bell green sauce, dumbass. I mean, why do you think that shit's glowing?" Commander Jessie asked as Clyde glanced over at the barrel and then turned back to the others.

"Maybe because of the three varieties of chili peppers,"

"...Just give us the Stick of Truth, asshole," A blank-faced Maiden Heidi says as she struggled to rein in Brute from beating up Clyde.

"Or what? You'll beat me up? Ha, ha...I've got another surprise for you," Clyde says while going over to the barrel filled with the alien green goo and turned on the valve to have the casket filled with green goo as, much to their shock, a Nazi Zombie Chef emerged out of the casket and roared loudly.

"I'm gonna make love to you womaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!"

"Mmmmm Mmmmm Mmmmm?! (Nazi Zombie Chef?!), " A shocked Princess Kenny asked as he and the others teared up at the sight of him.

"You have crossed a serious line, Clyde! This is not cool!" Grand Wizard Cartman snapped as, for once in his life, the High Jew Elf King Kyle nodded.

"Yeah, how dare you use Chef against us?! He was your friend and cared about you, asshole!"

"Jessie, you have to fight him. We can't. We can't...fight Chef, he's practically like a second dad to us." Ranger Stan says with tears in his eyes as a sniffing Maiden Heidi turned to Jessie.

"But when you fight Chef, don't destroy him! Maybe we can find a way to De-Zombie him and bring him back to life!"

"On it." A serious Jessie says while stepping forward as he narrowed his glowing blue eyes at Nazi Zombie Chef. "Let's end this!" Jessie says while speeding forward as Nazi Zombie Chef roared savagely and tried to swipe at him, but Jessie appeared behind him and grabbed onto the Nazi Zombie as he lifted him up into the air. "How do I change him back?!"

"You can't! The Chef that you know is gone forever! Not only physically but also mentally!" Clyde yelled with an evil laugh as Maiden Heidi then twitched and gasped sharply as Love Warrior Wendy turned to her.

"Uh, Heidi, you okay?" Love Warrior Wendy asked as Maiden Heidi's appearance had changed again, and now gained amber eyes with shoulder-length red hair, freckles on her cheeks, and was now wearing a long blue cape that reached down to her back, a short-sleeved white top with a red X on it, a pair of blue gloves, a blue skirt, and a pair of ankle-length blue boots.

"Uh, Hello Megan! If anyone can restore Chef's Mind, it's me!" The Now-Named Megan says with her eyes glowing blue and her hair flying upwards as she raised her hand and began messing with Nazi Zombie Chef's mind as he growled and struggled to break out of Jessie's hold but then blinked a couple of times as Megan was able to fix up his mind slowly.

"Children, my god, what I have done?!"

"He's fighting it! Keep going, Megan!" Jessie ordered as Megan said nothing and continued fixing his mind as she was able to finish healing it, but still kept his Nazi Zombie Body as Chef blinked a couple of times but then beamed as he smiled.

"Kids! I'm back!"

"Chef!" Everyone cheered happily as Clyde fumed at this.

"Hey, I raised you from the dead, you have to obey me!" Clyde ordered while pressing a few buttons on his throne to have the tubes disconnect from the casket and flew over to try and shoot more slimes of alien green goo at a scared Nazi Zombie Chef, but thankfully, Jessie was able to toss him away, and reached over to grab the tube as he then used his superhuman strength to yank the barrel of toxic alien green goo out of the ground and twirled around to slam it over at Clyde, who screamed panickedly and jumped out of the way as the barrel burst through the wall of the castle and disappeared from sight as Clyde crashed down into the ground and dropped the Stick of Truth as Megan used her telekinesis to grab it and flew it over to land in Jessie's hand as he glared down at a nervous Clyde furiously.

"Clyde? Your eons of torment are at an end, Ruler of Darkness!" Jessie screamed while raising his Stick of Truth as he used its power to strip Clyde of his powers and had Cartman and Kyle regain their full powers and titles of their kingdoms again as the blue-haired boy then used the Stick of Truth to telekinetically latched onto a now nervous and scared Clyde as he raised him up into the air.

"Um...okay, um, you know what?! I'm not playing anymore!"

"Nice try, asshole," Jessie says with a glare as his eyes and hair got covered with blue electricity as he floated upwards, and the others gasped in awe as they all thought that the Stick of Truth is doing that. "You know what, Clyde? When Cartman banished you a couple of days ago, I thought it was too cruel of him to do that but after breaking the rules of the game and trying to take over the city of South Park and take over all of Zaron with the help of your Nazi Zombie Army? You deserve nothing but the harshest punishment! So, it's why with a heavy heart that I banish you from...SPACE AND TIME!" Jessie screamed with a demonic tone while holding up the Stick of Truth and created a portal to a place with no space and time as it sucked up a screaming Clyde, and said person was pulled into the void as the portal closed up. "...At least until the game is over," Jessie says with a sly grin while he stops glowing with blue electricity as he then floats down onto the ground.

"Jessie, you did it!" Maiden Heidi squealed happily after switching back earlier as she rushed over to hug and kiss King Jessie as Paladin Butters, Prince Karen, and Jimmy the Bard walked up to him.

"Yeah, buddy, you saved all of South Park." Butters says with a warm smile as a starry-eyed Prince Karen nods.

"You are our hero."

"Well, done, Commander D-Douchebag." Jimmy the Bard as Commander Jessie smiled and nodded as he casually dropped the Stick of Truth over his shoulder.

"Thanks, guys, couldn't have done it without ya."

"Chef, you are alive!" A smiling High Jew Elf King Kyle says as he, Ranger Stan, Grand Wizard Cartman, Princess Kenny, and Love Warrior Wendy went over to hug a Nazi Zombie Chef.

"We are so happy to see you!" Love Warrior Wendy says as Ranger Stan nodded.

"Yeah, and we want to say that we are sorry that we weren't able to save you from this Scientology assholes!"

"Mm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm! (We tried the best that we could!), " Princess Kenny says with teary eyes as Nazi Zombie Chef smiled down at them warmly.

"Don't worry, kids, I'm just happy to be back,"

"And we're happy to have you back as well, Chef." Maiden Heidi says with a beaming smile as she and the others walk up to the group as Grand Wizard Cartman steps forward to give Commander Jessie a proud and excited smirk.

"What you did back there was awesome, Douchebag! Your noble quest is at an end! And for all your deeds, and all your time put into this, I hereby promote you...to King Jessie while your Girlfriend will be...Queen Heidi! Congratulations!" Grand Wizard Cartman says with everyone clapping and cheering loudly as King Jessie smirked cockily and held out the Stick of Truth as a flash of blue light occurred, and we see the blue-haired boy now suited up with his Level 16 Fighters Crown of Insight as he dyed it blue and equipped it with his Level 14 Purple Heart Badge Patch, his Level 16 Fither's Armor as he equipped his Level 13 Superhero Patch, and his Fighters Gauntlets of Defense as he dyed it white with blue accents and equipped his Level 13 Ranger Patch as he then equipped his Sweet Katana with his Level 14 Hot Topic Catalog Patch and his Crowssbow of Impalment with his Level 14 Bayonette Patch as Queen Heidi simply gained a floral crown with a flash of blue light.

"Thank you, thank you. Now that War of Zaron is over, it's time for me to put the Stick of Truth to good use!" A grinning King Jessie says while holding up his Stick of Truth as he is about to use its great power, but then yelps in surprise as a bullet flies over to collide against his hand, sending the Stick of Truth flying over to land on the ground as the sound of helicopters filled the air and the group are surrounded by a bunch Government Agents as they landed inside of the room and a glaring Russel stepped forward.

"So it really IS you, Dragonborn."

"Oh, goddamn it." A glaring Jessie says with a nervous sweat bead on his head as the Government Agents aim their guns at the group.

"Just can't stop being a thorn in our side, huh?" Russel asked while bending down to grab the Stick of Truth as Grand Wizard Cartman gasped in shock.

"He has the Stick of Truth!"

"Jessie...he's the guy, huh?" Queen Heidi asked with a knowing yet anxious tone as King Jessie nodded while glaring over at Russel.

"Yes, it's him, my uncle Russel, an Agent of the U.S. Government and who is in charge of the Metahuman And Supernatural Containment And Extermination Division."

"Doesn't that just spell, M.A.S.C.A.E.D.?" A bewildered Jimmy the Bard asked as Jessie sighed heavily.

"Yeah, they are not good with coming up with names..."

"Wait, wait, wait, hold on, this guy is your uncle?" A shocked Love Warrior asked as Paladin Butters turned to King Jessie.

"Wait, how is this guy your uncle, King Jessie?"

"King Jessie? Is THAT what you told them your name was?" A scoffing Russel asked as he rolled his eyes. "Why didn't you tell them your REAL name..."

"No! Don't you dare say it, asshole!" An angry Jessie yelled with his eyes glowing a bright blue as Russel smirked cockily.

"Oh, come is that any way to speak to your Uncle...Dovahkiin?!" Russel asked with Jessie's face paling as he groaned and facepalmed.

"Ugh, here we go..."

"Wait...Dovahkiin?" A shocked Ranger Stan asked as Princess Kenny raised an eyebrow.

"Mmm mmm'mm mmm mmm mmmm...Mmmmmm? (My lover's real name is...Dovahkiin?),"

"Hold on...doesn't Dovahkiin mean Dragon?" High Jew Elf King Kyle asked as Prince Karen nodded

"Yeah, it does."

"And we have been calling Jessie, 'Dragonborn', this whole time." Paladin Butters says as Grand Wizard Cartman snorts.

"Oh, my god! That's fucking hilarious! Douchebag's real name means Dragon and his nickname is Dragonborb!" Grand Wizard Cartman says as he and the others begin laughing loudly.

"Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

"I fucking hate you all.." A glaring King Jessie says with a big thick mark on his head and his face flushed in embarrassment as Queen Heidi giggles.

"Dovahkiin, huh? I think that name is cute." Queen Heidi cooed as King Jessie blushed harder and huffed as he then scowled over at Russel.

"What are you doing here, Uncle?"

"What else, Dovahkiin? I'm here for you."

"Look, man, King Dovahkiin is with us." Grand Wizard Cartman says as King Jessie groaned and facepalmed.

"Ugh, I think I prefer him calling me, 'Douchebag', over 'Dovahkiin'..."

"Yeah, and that Stick of Truth belongs with the fighters of Zaron. Give it back." Paladin Butters ordered as Russel scoffed and rolled his eyes as he narrowed his eyes.

"Fighters of Zaron? Kids, what's going on here is much more complex than that. This isn't the first time a UFO has crashed to Earth. You see, in 1947 a UFO crashed in Roswell, New Mexico..."

"Oh, god..." An annoyed King Jessie says as High Jew Elf King nodded in agreement.

"Oh no..."

"Mmmm mmmm, mmmm mmmmm... (Oh brother, spare us...)," Princess Kenny says with a glare as Rusell holds out his hand.

"Hang on a sec. A UFO crashed in Roswell and a new government agency was formed to investigate the paranormal. Our Agency. The Metahuman And Supernatural Containment And Extermination Division, or M.A.S.C.A.E.D. for short."

"Can we skip this, please?" Prince Karen begged dryly as Jimmy the Bard nodded in agreement.

"L-L-Like, hit the skip button or something?"

"Oh, you don't want to skip this," Russel says pleadingly as Love Warrior Wendy nods with a yawn.

"Yes, we do,"

"Whenever aliens are spotted, vampires run amok, our agency is there and we have never lost a fight...except that we have been losing a lot lately for the past two decades or so, so that's when we decided to do a project named, 'Project Dovahkiin', which is where the U.S. Government allowed us to create genetically engineered superpowered metahumans like Dovahkiin over here to be Child Soldiers by the Government to take out all of the Supernatural Beings on the whole Earth, but Dovahkiin's Former Caretakers, who are his 'parents', had a change of heart and were able to save him from our agency when he was five-years-old and have been on the run ever since."

"We had moved from city to city, changed our names and appearances, and tried to hide my powers from the public, but eventually, it started taking a toll on us. We couldn't keep running from the Government forever, but we couldn't turn ourselves in because I would be locked up again, and my Parents would be killed for being traitors of the country. That's when my Dad figured out a way to find a city where we could both hide from the Government and be our true selves, which is South Park. My Dad said that this would be the perfect place to hide since, in his own words, 'A lot of crazy shit happens in this city on a regular basis that makes my powers pale in comparison. This is the perfect hiding place for him'," King Jessie says with a scowl as Rusell nods with a laugh.

"Yeah, but as turns out, this was the worst place to hide because now the Government knows where you were, and why we were able to finally find you to try and capture you. A child who had unlimited power deep inside him and the only successful genetically engineered experiment that would've helped us take out all opposition threats in the manner of months."

"Wait...the government wants the New Kid for his farts?" A bewildered Paladin Butters asked as Nazi Zombie Cheff frowned blankly.

"That's dumb."

"No, it's not my farts, idiots," Jessie says with a heavy sigh while covering his whole body with blue electricity as everyone, minus Heidi, looks stunned by the sight of it. "I hate to say it, but what he said is true. I'm a Genetically Engineered Superhuman with the power to emit this blue electricity that enhances my body to superhuman levels and allows me to shoot, control, and absorb electricity."

"Not only that, but Dovahkiin has the unique power to negate superpowers and absorb said powers into his being," Russel says, surprising everyone with the news as even Jessie was shocked by this.

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah, that's why you are our perfect super weapon, Dovahkiin. You have the power to take out all supernatural beings from this planet out of existence for good. Do you have any idea of the power that kind of gift yields in today's world? It's time to come with us, Dovahkiin. Time to stop resisting, and use your power for your country,"

"Fuck the country! Dovahkiin is his own person! You don't own him!" A glaring Queen Heidi yelled as Paladin Butters with a determined glare on his face.

"Yeah, King Jessie is our friend, and you will never take him away from us!"

"Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm! Mmmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmmm! (You mess with one of us, you deal with all of us! I won't let you take the love of my life and the father of our child away from me!)," Princess Kenny yelled as Nazi Zombie Chef nodded and pointed over at Jessie.

"Yeah, I may not know this kid that, but I know these kids and if they care about him, then I care about him too, so why don't you motherfuckers get the fuck out of our town!" Nazi Zombie Chef shouted as everyone, minis Cartman, screamed in agreement, and King Jessie genuinely felt touched by what they said and teared up, unable to believe that these people that barely knew him were willing to stand up and defend him as he wiped away his tears and floated forward.

"They are right! I may have powers, but I'm still a Human Being and I deserve to live my life however way that I want! And I want to live in South Park and be a normal guy with my amazing girlfriend, my annoying yet loving parents, and my great friends, so why don't you shove that Stick of Truth up your ass, and get the fuck out of my life, Uncle Russel!" Jessie says with his body covered with blue electricity as everyone cheers, and Russel glares at him coldly before laughing sinisterly as he shakes his head.

"Oh, nice speech, Dovahkiin, but I have to ask, are we so different?"

"Oh, god, he is still talking?" An annoyed Jimmy the Bard asked as Russel began ranting.

"You have to do what the Government tells you just like me. We're all just pawns in their game. I'll admit, you are fascinating, dear nephew. You have more power than any child that I've ever come across. Unlimited electrical energy, the strength of ten men, the power to nullify other superhuman powers, durable enough to survive a nuke, you are a regular Superman of this world, and yet all you seem to really care about...is this," Russel says while holding up the Stick of Truth as he narrowed his eyes at it stoically. "It must be very important. What does it do?"

"Whoever controls the Stick controls the universe, dumbass," Grand Wizard Cartman says with a scoff as Ranger Stan nodded in agreement with a scowl.

"Yeah, stupid,"

"WHY The FUCK. WOULD YOU TELL HIM THAT?!" An enraged King Jessie asked with his whole body covered with electricity as Cartman and Stan winced and sweatdropped as their friends glared at them.

"...Controls the...but then...I wouldn't have to do any of this anymore...I could..." Russel says with wide, shocked eyes as he then grins maliciously and begins laughing evilly as the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. raises the Stick of Truth into the air and laughed sinisterly. "I control the universe! Get back! BACK I SAY! ALL OF YOU!" Russel screamed while jabbing the Stick of Truth at the Government Agents as they backed away from him. "I can do ANYTHING! ANYTHING I WANT! I no longer need you, Dovahkiin!" Russel shouted while stripping off his clothes to leave him naked as everyone cringed in disgust and horror at the sight of him. "I CONTROL THE UNIVERSE!" Russel screamed as he then grinned sinisterly and aimed the Stick of Truth over at the kids. "And my first order as God of the Universe is to vaporize you kids from existence! Be gone!" Russel exclaimed as he was planning to try and vaporize Jessie and the others from the plane of existence, only for nothing to happen as he growled. "Damn thing! How does it work?! Show me how it works!"

"If you put your pants on and say, 'Please', we would." King Jessie says with a mocking tone and a grin as Russel studies the Stick of Truth and then glances over at King Jessie.

"Dovahkiin, why should we be on the opposite sides? Join me, my dear nephew. Rule by my side and I can share you half of the Stick of Truth's powers. We can rule the universe together forever. Just get me safely out of here, explain to me on how the Stick of Truth works, and we can rule the universe." Russel says as King Jessie remained silent, and the others spotted this as they smirked cockily and laughed.

"You underestimated the character of the fighters of Zaron." Ranger Stan says with a smirk as Love Warrior Wendy nodded and reached over to grab his hand.

"What binds us is MORE than that relic,"

"And you failed to recognize the character of our alliance," The High Jew Elf King Kyle says as Grand Wizard Cartman nods with a smirk.

"Yes, and that friendship is more important to any of us.

"Mmmm mmm mmmm mmmm mmmm mmm Mmmmm mmmm Mmmmmm (Even more so than even the Stick of Truth)," Princess Kenny says with a hmph as Prince Karen nodded with a glare.

"So you can take that offer and shoved it up your wrinkled flat ass."

"Because King Jessie is the most selfless man in all of Zaron." Paladin Butters says as Jimmy the Bard nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, he helped us out multiple times for three days,"

"There's no way that Dovahkiin would betray all of us for some measley power." Queen Heidi says with a confident smile...which turns into a frown as a stoic Jessie walks forward. "Dovahkiin? Jessie, what are you doing?" A worried Heidi asked while the others raised an eyebrow confusedly as King Jessie walked over to his naked uncle and held out his hand as everyone gasped in shock and horror.

"No, kid, don't do this!" Nazi Zombie Chef yelled as everyone began begging for King Jessie to reconsider and come back to the light only for said person to ignore all of them as Russel smirked evilly and held out the arm that held the Stick of Truth as he shook hands with his nephew.

"You know what, Uncle? I really appreciate this."

"Giving you the offer to become a God like me?" Russel asked with a raised eyebrow as King Jessie then grinned determinedly.

"No, you sticking out the Stick of Truth like an idiot." King Jessie says with a mischievous grin as his whole body is covered with blue electricity and begins absorbing the power out of the Stick of Truth, much to Russel's shock as his eyes widen.

"Hey! What are you doing?!"

"Newsflash, dumbass, I tricked you into letting me touch the Stick of Truth. Also, I want to say, thanks for telling me about my true power. I would've never known that I had the ability to nullify and absorb powers. Really appreciate it, Uncle." King Jessie says with an evil grin while finishing absorbing half of the Stick of Truth's power as his hair, skin, and eyes glow a bright rainbow-like color. "And now, thanks to you, I have the power to control the universe. Like so." King Jessie says while creating a huge rainbow-like colored dragon-like aura as the Super Soldier floats up into the air and then turns around to face his friends as the rainbow-haired boy then breathes out a huge stream of rainbow-like energy that washed over Queen Heidi and the others' bodies as, much to their shock, their hair, skin, and eyes glowed a bright rainbow-like color as they all felt their magic and powers get increased tenfold. "Now, I have increased all of your powers so that you would be able to fight against my Uncle because you guys are right. Nothing is stronger than our friendship, which includes being stronger than the Stick of Truth." King Jessie says as Russel growls angrily and imagines himself with the same power that is all of those kids have as he is then shocked when he is covered with a rainbow-like energy aura and grins evilly.

"Well, bad news for you, kids, but I have finally learned how to use this Stick of Truth! So now you are all dead!"

~[Feeling Froggy from, 'Phineas and Ferb: Mission Marvel', Song]~

Oh yeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Flying up high into the air, King Jessie and his Rainbow Dragon Aura roared savagely as Queen Heidi swiftly turned into Jade and said person reached behind her to pull out two glowing rainbow daggers as she twirled them around rapidly and glared, Paladin Butters held out his Hammer as it sparkled with rainbow-colored electricity, Grand Wizard Cartman held out his glowing rainbow staff, Princess Kenny held out her glowing hands, Prince Karen held out his glowing rainbow sword, High Elf Jew King Kyle held out his glowing rainbow club, Ranger Stan twirled around his glowing rainbow sword, Jimmy the Bard raised his glowing rainbow flute to his mouth, Warrior Wendy held out her glowing rainbow bow and arrow, and a glowing rainbow Nazi Zombie Chef growled as Russel cracked his knuckles and flew up into the air to crash through the roof of Clyde's Castle and flew up into the air as he then grew out in size to be 500-feet-tall and used the Stick of Truth to have the clouds turn black and sparkled with rainbow electricity.

What are you lookin' at?

You think you're kinda bad?

I know you're thinkin' that you wanna try to knock me down!

Roaring loudly, King Jessie allowed Jade to leap up and land on his back as he then flew upwards and burst through the roof of Clyde's Castle with Paladin Butters twirling around his sparkling rainbow hammer and then flung it upwards to propel him up into the air as King Jessie roared out a big stream of rainbow flames up at Russel, who held out his arm to create a big rainbow energy shield to protect himself, but it left him open for Jade to throw her daggers over to pierce into his eyes, blinding and injuring him as he roared in pain and Paladin Butters flew over to pat the couple's back to heal of them of any injuries that they got earlier before flying upwards to unleash his next attacks.

After exclaiming, 'Hammer of Justice!', Butters then spun around for a bit as he threw his glowing rainbow hammer that flew over to collide against Russel's head, causing him to roar in pain as Paladin Butters then yelled, 'Hammer of Storms!', while raising his hammer as a dark gray cloud appeared above him, and a giant bolt of rainbow lightning rang out as it impacted against his hammer and Butters then blasted a bolt of yellow lightning that impacted against Russel, sending him flying back as he then had a butterfly appear in his hand, and Paladin Butters smiles cheerfully before growing a sinister smirk as he chuckles while grabbing onto his cape as he whirled around, and transformed into the Anime Version of his Professor Chaos form as he laughed evilly, and floated upwards while crossing his arms with his cape blowing in the wind as his body radiated with golden electricity as Anime Professor Chaos chanted, 'Chaos Cloack!', and coated both King and Queen of Zaroon with invisible energy forcefields as he then chanted, 'Hammer of Justice!', and Anime Professor Chaos held his hand and a dark gray storm appeared as a huge bolt of rainbow-colored lighting impacted against his arm and created a huge hammer as he proceeded to fly over and slam it against Russel's sides as he roared in pain.

After chanting, 'Life Drain!', Anime Professor Chaos then held out his glowing rainbow hands to began sucking the life energy out of Russel, weakening him as Anime Professor Chaos then yelled, 'Chaos Storm!', and fired multiple bots of rainbow electricity at Russel, shocking him relentlessly as Anime Professor Chaos then says, 'Chaos Blast!', while cupping his arms together as a huge ball of rainbow electricity appeared in between his hands and let out a loud battle cry as Butters fired a huge rainbow energy laser in the shape of lightning as it flew over to Russel, who held out his Stick of Truth and fired a big beam of rainbow energy that collided against his attack, getting in a beam struggle as Jade saw this and jumped off from her boyfriend's back as she turned into Brute and roared loudly as she delivered a mighty double downwards punch at Russel's head with a big shockwave ranging out and caused Jessie's Uncle to roar in pain and lost his concentration as Anime Professor Chaos's attack collided against him and a big explosion occured that sends him flying up high into the air.

Well, go on, punk, and bring it!

Just throw it down and wing it!

Got somethin' heavy? Swing it!

Gonna try and knock me down!

Narrowing his eyes, King Jessie then exclaimed, 'Assault and Battery!', and created a huge spiked rainbow energy bat and a big rainbow energy baseball as the rainbow-haired boy then tossed the ball into the air and was quick to use his Super Strength to whack the baseball forward as it flew over to collide against Russel's crotch, breaking his tiny balls as he screamed in pain and Brute turned into Aria as she created multiple rainbow energy steps underneath her and began running through the air as Queen Heidi's Sister began running around Russel's body rapidly, creating a big rainbow-colored tornado that propelled him up into the air and sends him crashing down into the ground, destroying a lot of houses and killing a bunch of people as the McCormick burst out of Clyde's Castle while riding around on a unicorn that can fly as it neighed loudly.

After advising Prince Karen to briefly close his eyes, Princess Kenny then turned to whistle loudly at Russel to get his attention and reached up to grab onto her dress to pull it down to reveal her now giant K-Cup Breasts to him causing the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. to grow horny and gain hearty eyes as this left him distracted enough for Princess Kenny to mumble, 'Mmmm Mmmm! (Royal Kiss!)', and jumped off from her unicorn to land on his cheek as she then planted a kiss on his cheek, catching Russel completely off guard as he grew sick and vomited on the ground, and Princess Kenny then mumbled, 'Mmmmm Mmmmm! (Furry Friends!)', as she starts singing elegantly and attracts all of the Rats in South Park and orders them to attack Russel as they wash over his whole naked body, causing him to scream in disgust and fear as he struggles to slap them away from his body.

After mumbling, 'Unicorn Stampede!', Princess Kenny then swiftly raised her hands as a rainbow aura covered her whole body, and Kenny was able to summon a horde of Giant Unicorns as they appeared on the scene and neighed loudly as Prince Karen flew down to grab his older sister and flew her to safety as all of the Giant Unicorns proceed to trample over Russel's body, severely injuring Jessie's Uncle as, after making sure that his Older Sister was safe, Prince Karen then commanded his unicorn to fly back over to Russel and chanted, 'Excelsior!', while raising his toy sword and it let out a huge flash of bright rainbow light that blinded Jessie's Uncle as Prince Karen then jumped off from the Unicorn and held out his glowing rainbow sword as he chanted, 'Sword in the Stone!', and proceeds to stab it down onto the ground as Prince Karen then lets out a loud battle cry and swings his sword forward, creating a huge rainbow shockwave that travels over to collide against Russel, sending him flying over to crash against several buildings and then collided against a nearby snow mountain as the whole area trembled loudly by the force of his attack.

You think you gotta hand, ya better play it,

But don't be surprised if you pull back a stump!

That chip on your shoulder, I think ya better weigh it,

'Cause I'm just gonna say it!

If you're feelin' froggy, then jump!

Flying over to hover near his Naked Uncle, King Jessie then yelled, 'Roshambo!', and gestured at him if he wanted to play a game of rock-paper-scissors with him, and the confused Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. reluctantly agreed to play, but then yelped in pain as King Jessie raised his rainbow energy dragon tail to deliver a mighty tailwhip to his nuts, causing him to kneel down onto the floor in pain while squealing like a little girl as Brute was falling down through the air and then turned into Ember as she then lets out a loud battle cry and a huge burst of red flames covered her body and fired a big stream of red flames down at Russel's body as he screamed in pain.

After he and Jimmy the Bard appeared on the roof of Clyde's Castle, Ranger Stan then used his laser pointer to Russel's crotch and ordered Sparky to attack him as he appeared in the scene while in the same size as the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. and growled threateningly as Sparky ran over to bite his tiny dick, causing Russel to howl in pain as Ranger Stan then chanted, 'Discus of Might!', and pulled out a metal disc and held out his arms as Stan started spinning around rapidly before throwing his disc forward as it flew over to collide against Russel's chest, causing him to grunt in pain as Ranger Stan chanted, 'Whirlwind Slash!' and leaped forward into the air at high speeds as he started spinning around rapidly, resembling a blue, brown, and green tornado as Stan collided against Russel's chest and began slashing against it repeatedly, causing slash marks to appear all over his body as Ranger Stan then chanted, 'Way of the Sword!', and channels his inner action hero as Stan swings his sword six times before the final blow, and leave multiple bleeding scars on Russel's chest, causing him to scream in agony as Prince Karen and Princess Kenny flew over to grab him to take him to safety.

Reaching behind him to pull out his ukelele, Jimmy the Bard then strummed a power cord, raising everyone's PP to their maximum as he chanted, 'Song of Buffness!', and began strumming his ukelele as Jimmtge Bard began singing, 'And now for my next trick...there was once a maiden from S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-Stonebury Hollow. She didn't talk much, but damn did she s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-swallow. I have a nice lance that she s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sat upon, the maiden from Stoneburry...who was also your Mom~', and not only lowered Russel defenses and guard but also increased everyone's strength as Jimy the Bard then chanted, 'Lullabye!', and started singing, 'Close your eyes, no more thinking...thinking about the troubles, sleep now with Jesus..for you are blessed~' as it caused for Russel to grow sleepy and groaned as he struggled to stay awake, and the Disabled Boy then warned everyone to cover their eyes as he reached behind him to pull out his flute and chanted, 'Brown Note!', as Jimmy the Bard proceeded to play the brown note, causing the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. to lose control of their bowels and begin screaming in pain as he shitted himself and his crap fell down into the city as Russel also lost his balance and landed on top of the mountain of shit.

If you're feelin' froggy, just jump!

You think you've got the stuff?

You think you're tough enough?

Then just roll up a cuff and come and try to knock me down!

You think you wanna dance?

Come on and take a chance!

Not worth a second glance, you wanna try to knock me down!

After exclaiming, 'Bull Rush!', King Jessie then put on his football helmet as he flew down to land on the ground and bent down as the rainbow-haired boy skidded his feet on the ground repeatedly before charging forward as he collided against Russel's crotch, breaking his balls as Aria turned into Dawn and floated over to hover above in a big sphere made out of water, air, fire, and earth as she decided to break her own bow of violence, and held out her hand to fire a big stream of air, water, fire, and earth that collided down on Russel's body, hurting him as he screamed in pain and the Grand Wizard King and the High Jew Elf King flew out of the hole on the ceiling of Clyde's Castle.

Reaching into his robes, Grand Wizard Cartman then pulled out a Magic Missle, which was really one of his Mom's tampons as he tossed it forward and it collided against Russel's face, disgusting him as Eric then chanted, 'Flame Strike!', and reached behind him to pull out a lighter and a hairspray with a sinister grin on his face as he joined them together to fire a big stream of flames that washed over to collide against the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D.'s face and said person screamed in pain as Grand Wizard Cartman then chanted, 'Burning Cloud!', while turning around and pulling down his pants as Eric placed his lighter in front of his ass and let out a big fart that collided against Russeel's body, burning him as Cartman then whirled around and chanted, 'Curse!' as he began saying, 'Fuck! Shit! Cock! Ass! Titties! Boner! Bitch! Muff! Pussy! Cunt! Butthole! Barbra Streisand!' and his body was covered with white electricity as his eyebrows were all spikey and his eyebrows are thick as he fired a huge build of rainbow lightning that collided against Russel's body and began electrifying the hell out of him as he wailed in agony.

Flying forward, the High Jew Elf King Kyle then raised his club and was able to rally everyone to increase their strength as he then chanted, 'Summon Elemental!', and his Giant Canadian Adoptive Brother appeared as Kyle said, 'Alright, Ike, kick the baby!', and Ike answered, 'Don't kick the goddamn baby!' angrily as High Jew Elf King took a couple of steps back and then ran over to kick him away, sending his brother flying through the air and pulled out his swords as Ike cheered loudly and was able to slash across Russel's neck, leaving a big bloody gash on it as Kyle then chanted, 'Windstorm!', and said, 'I summon the winds!' while reaching behind him to pull out his lawn blower as he activated it, and it fired out a huge gust of winds that blew away a surprised Russel as he collided against another snowy mountain and the High Jew Elf King then chanted, 'Rain of Arrows!', as he held up his club, and said, 'Ready...aim...fire!', as a bunch of Hidden Giant Drow Elves fired multiple red arrows that collided against the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D.'s body, severely injuring him as he screamed in pain.

So just say you're all in and let the chips fall

And then we can find out who's the real chump!

If you think I'm gonna fold, then you could win it all!

Then I'm gonna call!

If you're feelin' froggy, just jump!

Once he chanted, 'Horn of Irritation!', King Jessie reaches behind him to pull out his Airhorn as he then pressed it and sent out a loud horn sound as a big soundwave blast impacted against Russel, causing him to shriek in extreme pain and agony as Dawn flew forward and turned into Hela as she raised her rainbow-colored energy hands and created multiple chains of unholy rainbow energy that wrapped around Russel's body to restrain the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. as Love Warrior Wendy and Nazi Zombie Chef could be seen climbing out of the hole on the ceiling of Clyde's Castle to appear on the roof.

After chanting, 'Love Shower!', Love Warrior Wendy fired a bunch of love arrows that went over to pierce through Russel's body as she then chanted, 'Love Hurts!', and Love Warrior Wendy reached into her utility belt to pull out a bunch of heart shurikens and tossed them over to collide against Russel's arms and legs as he screamed in pain, and Love Warrior Wendy then chanted, 'Feel the Love, Motherfuckers!', while cupping her hands around her heart and her chest gained a glowing red energy heart as she then multiple large glowing red energy hearts that washed over Russel's body and said person screamed in agony as, once her attack was done, Nazi Zombie Chef leaped over to bite into his thumb to turn him into a Nazi Zombie as well.

If you're feelin' froggy, just jump!

If you're feelin' froggy, just jump!

Come on!

If you're feelin' froggy, just jump!

Realizing that he would need all of the power that he had left to deliver his last powerful finishing move, King Jessie then raised his hands and began absorbing all of the borrowed power from his friends, reverting their hair, skin, and eyes back to normal as he gently set them on the roof of Clyde's Castle while Hela turned into Megan and used her telekinesis to hold down Russel after he escaped from Hela's chains as, once he was back to being 100% in power, the rainbow-haired boy then chanted, 'Grooooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnndddddddddddddddddd...Stomp!' and flew up high into the air as he then swiftly crashed down on top of Russel's chest, caving him in and breaking a lot of his organs as a big rainbow shockwave rang out and the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. growled angrily as he swatted away his Nephew with the Stick of Truth.

~[Feeling Froggy from, 'Phineas and Ferb: Mission Marvel', Song Over]~

"THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS! I WON'T STAND FOR THIS BULLSHIT! I AM A FUCKING GOD, YOU FUCKING MORTALS, AND IF I CAN'T DEFEAT ALL OF YOU, THEN I WILL DESTROY THE UNIVERSE WITH ALL OF YOU IN IT TO REMAKE THE UNIVERSE IN MY IMAGE!" Russel screamed furiously while flying up into space and held out the Stick of Truth as he used it to begin charging up a universal rainbow energy ball of destruction and mayhem as King Jessie flew down to land in front of his friends and his rainbow energy dragon aura disappeared as his friends began to panic.

"Oh, shit! We are dead!" A worried Ranger Stan yelled as the High Jew Elf King Kyle nodded nervously.

"Dude, we're fucked! There's no way that we can survive this!"

"Mmmmm, mmmm mmm mmm mmmm mmm mmm mmmm mmm mmm mmmm mmm mmm mmmm mmm mmm mmmm mmm mmm (Yeah, I don't even think with the borrowed power that sexy hunk Jessie has is enough to save the universe!)," Princess Kenny says nervously as the Grand Wizard Cartman grows serious.

"Well, there is ONE WAY for King Douchebag to be able to save us with his borrowed power but he's going to need some extra power. We're going to need to have King Dovahkiin break the Gentleman's Code,"

"What?! Cartman, you can't possibly mean-,"

"What other choice do we have, Paladin Butters?!" Grand Wizard Cartman asked with a glare as a bewildered Love Warrior Wendy turned to Queen Heidi, who had turned back a while ago as she gave her a flat look.

"The Gentlemen's Code is basically that no boys are allowed to fart on another man's balls."

"...Are we seriously ending this epic story on a fart joke?" A bewildered and blank-faced Love Warrior Wendy asked as King Jessie sighed heavily with a groan.

"Yep, it seems so..."

"But that's so gross." Prince Karen says with a wince as Nazi Zombie Chef shrugged.

"Maybe, but if it saves our asses, then I say go for it."

"King Dovahkiin, you remember long ago when I made you swear an oath to never fart on anyone's balls?"

"Yeah, you keep telling me not to do that for days." A deadpan King Jessie says with his voice still echoing a bit as Grand Wizard Cartman reaches over to place his hands on his shoulder.

"Well, I am now asking you to break that oath,"

"Okay, but what will happen when I break the Gentlemen's Oath, though?" King Jessie asked as Jimmy the Bard turned to explain to him.

"W-Well, you see, King Jessie, when you break the G-Gentlemen's Oath by using D-Dragon Shout against a man's ball, you will destroy the whole planet. If you use C-Cup-A-Spell against another man's balls, you will destroy the whole solar system. If you use S-Squeaky Squeaker against another man's balls, you will destroy the whole galaxy, but if you N-Nagasaski, you could destroy the whole universe. In order to save us all and defeat your father, you need to use all of your F-Fart Magic against him."

"Fart on your Uncle's balls, King Dovahkiin! Do it!" Grand Wizard Cartman ordered while pointing up at space as King Jessie stared at all of them blankly...before shrugging as he sighed.

"Well, this isn't any worse than going inside of a Gay Man's asshole, so...fuck it! Let's do it!" King Jessie says while taking off high into the air and covering himself in a big rainbow-colored dragon-shaped energy aura as he arrives in space and spots his Uncle Russel STILL charging up his universal ball energy blast as he is quick to get to work. "Dragonshout!" King Jessie screamed while turning his ass towards his Uncle Russel as he lets out a loud fart bubble that flew over to impact against his balls, and Mars was blown up near him.

"Cup-A-Spell!" King Jessie shouted while hovering his hand behind his ass as he then lets out a loud fart bubble and cupped it as Jessie lets out a loud yell and thrust his arm forward as his fart bubble flew over to impact against Uncle Russel's balls and a nearby solar system was blown up. "Sneaky Squeaker!" King Jessie whispered-yelled under his breath while twirling around as his face scrunched up a bit and proceeds to fart into his hand as he then threw his smelly projectile forward and was able to manipulate it to fly over and appear behind an oblivious Russel as his fart cloud detonated, letting out a loud farting noise as the bewildered Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D. turned around and his Stick of Truth enabled him to see that a nearby galaxy was blown to smithereens.

"Wait, what?! You are breaking the Gentlemen's Oath?! How could you, Nephew!"

"I will do anything in order to defeat you, Uncle!" King Jessie says with a glare on his face as Russel glares back down at him and finishes charging his universal rainbow energy ball of destruction and mayhem as he is about to toss it forward, but then-

"Nagasaki!" King Jessie exclaimed while turning to aim his ass at his Uncle Russel as he then held in a fart, and his asscheeks began juggling as the blue-haired boy then lets out a loud fart that flew over to collide against his Uncle Russel's universal rainbow energy ball of destruction and mayhem and caused a huge bright white light to occur as it washed over the whole universe, and it was able to thankfully cancel out the Leader of M.A.S.C.E.D.'s attack as well as vaporizing Russel from out of existence and his angered, pained screams rang out as the only thing that survived from the attack was the Stick of Truth and King Jessie flew over to grab it as he proceeds to transfer its borrowed power back into the magical relic and created a big blue electrical forcefield around himself to protect from the lack of air in space as Jessie's hair, skin, and eyes returned back to normal.

"Alright, now before something bad happens again, it's time to end this War of Zaron for good!" A determined King Jessie screamed as he held out the Stick of Truth, and it glowed a bright rainbow color. "Stick of Truth, I'm going to make five wishes, and I don't want you to grant them until I'm done wishing!" King Jessie demanded as the Stick of Truth glowed once as if saying, 'Yes'. "One, I wish that all of the Governments in the world had completely forgotten about my Parents and my involvement in Project Dovahkiin and that we get completely new lives for ourselves in the City of South Park with all of the necessary things that we need in order to prove our existence to the world so that my Parents and I are would be able to live out our new lives peacefully!"

"Two, I wish that all of the people who have died since the Stick of Truth Game had begun to be brought back to life, except for my Uncle Russel as I wish that he remained vaporized out of existence for all eternity! Three, I wish that Chef had his old human body back, and for everyone, besides me and my friends, to forget that he died years ago and has his old life back! Four, I wish that everyone, except for Heidi and I, to forget that I went up Mr. Slave's asshole to deactivate the snuke as I simply want everyone to instead find out that it was a dud this whole time and I never even needed to enter Mr. Slave's asshole in the first place! And for my final wish, I wish that everything was back to normal and that only me, my parents, Heidi, Butters, Cartman, Kenny, Kyle, Stan, Wendy, and Chef remember about my secret past and me having superpowers!" King Jessie exclaimed as the Stick of Truth glowed brightly and it let out a huge flash of bright rainbow light that zoomed across the whole universe as, once it died down, we see King Jessie, Queen Heidi, Paladin Butters, Grand Wizard Cartman, Princess Kenny, High Jew Elf King Kyle, Ranger Stan, Warrior Wendy, and a Human Chef residing near Stark's Pond.

"Whoa, what just happened?" A bewildered Love Warrior Wendy asked as she and the others got up from the ground and looked around as they were all shocked to see that the city of South Park was no longer in ruins and was back to what it used to look like as the Alien's UFO Spaceship, all of the Alien Green Goo, and all of the Government Vehicles were gone too.

"Oh, I just used all of my Fart Magic to stop my Uncle Russel's Universal Energy Ball, vaporized him from existence, and then used the Stick of Truth to turn everything back to normal, including you Chef. Say hello to having your old life back." King Jessie says with a smile as a stunned Chef glances down at his human hands and perks up as he teared up.

"I can't believe that you did this to me, kiddo! I'm alive and I'm human again! Children, I'm back!"

"Chef!" Paladin Butters, Queen Heidi, and Love Warrior Wendy exclaimed happily while going over to hug Chef as the rest of the kids turned over to stare at King Jessie curiously.

"Mmmm, Mmm Mmm, mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm, mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm? (So, King Jessie, now that you have the power of the universe in your hands, what are you going to do now?)," Princess Kenny asked as King Jessie glanced down at the Stick of Truth.

"Well, with this thing, I can control the elements, can control time and space itself, reshape the Earth however way I want, visit other universes-Hell, I can even age all of us up to be 16 years old and I can mind control all of the girls in South Park to be my love slaves for all eternity and breed how many babies that I wanted! With the Stick of Truth, I can be a God...or I can just be me and wish for the Stick of Truth to loose all of its power to finally end this game once and for all." Jessie says while briefly having a power-hungry and maniacal smile on his face before gaining back his usual warm and sly smile as Ranger Stan, the High Jew Elf King Kyle, and Princess Kenny nodded approvingly as Grand Wizard Cartman did a double take in shock.

"What?! Are you crazy?! Are you really willing to lose all of the Powers of a God just like that?!"

"Yeah, I have to agree with King Jessie here. I mean, there's no other way for this game to end," High Jew Elf King Kyle says as Ranger Stan nodded in agreement.

"It drove Jessie's Uncle to madness and nearly killed us all in less than five minutes. While Jessie is the strongest of us all, even he would fall into temptation one day and be just as corrupted as his uncle was...besides, you DO realize that if Jessie keeps the Stick of Truth and becomes God, he would probably have you be tortured and in pain for all eternity, right?"

"...Yeah, you are right, do the thing, King Dovahkiin." Grand Wizard Cartman says with a nervous and pale look on his face as King Jessie nods and flies up high into the air with his body covered in blue electricity as he holds up his glowing rainbow Stick of Truth.

"For my true final wish, I wish that the Stick of Truth will lose all of its powers and turn back into a normal powerless stick!" Jessie demanded as the Stick of Truth glowed a bright rainbow-like color and it swiftly turned back into a regular stick as the blue-haired boy landed back down on the ground and then reared back his arm as he took one last look at the Stick of Truth before throwing it far, far, far into the air as it disappeared from sight, and just like that, a wave of rainbow-like energy coursed through the whole city and Jessie was shocked to find out that he and the others were reverted back to wearing their casual outfits as he also lost all of his new powers and magical items as the blue-haired boy even reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see all of the apps from the Stick of Truth Game are gone too.

"...So what do you guys wanna play now?!" Cartman asked excitedly while wearing a blue hat with a yellow puff ball on top, a long-sleeved red buttoned-up jacket, a pair of yellow mittens, long brown pants, and a pair of black shoes.

"How about Dinosaur Hunters?!" Stan asked hopefully while wearing a blue hat with a red puffball and rim, a long-sleeved brown jacket with a red collar, a white v-neck shirt underneath, a pair of red mittens, long blue jeans, and a pair of black shoes.

"Or Pharaohs and Mummies!" Kyle asked with a beam while wearing a greenish lime ushanka, a long-sleeved bright orange jacket, a pair of lime-green mittens, long dark green pants, and a pair of black shoes.

"Mmmm'mmm mmm Mmmm (Let's ask Jessie)," Kenny suggested while wearing a long-sleeved orange parka, a sleeveless white shirt underneath, a pair of brown gloves, long orange pants, and a pair of black shoes. "Mmmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmmm? (What do you wanna play next, dude?)," Kenny asked as he, Stan, Cartman, and Kyle all glanced over at Jessie expectantly as he blinked slowly and cupped his hands together as he took a deep breath.

"Screw you guys, I'm going home," Jessie says while pointing over at the direction of his home as he then turned around to leave, and everyone watched him go in stunned shock.

"...Wow, what a dick," Cartman says with the others giving him a disbelieving look as Jessie walks out of Stark's Pond and was able to arrive back at his home after a lot of walking as he was surprised to see a Fatdactyl Chinpokomon at the porch of his house and went over to bend down and grab it just as Jessie heard his phone's notification sound rang out and reached into his pocket to pull out his phone to see that the Chinpokomon Toy Corporation had sent him a Friend Request as well as a message saying, 'Congratulations, Jessie-Chan. You a-first to collect all Chinpokomon! You have a big American penis. Japanese penis very small' and the blue-haired boy shrugged a bit before putting away his phone as he then opened the door to his house and went inside it while noticing that his Parents were missing as Jessie shrugged and made his way up to his room as he opened the door and was surprised to see a smirking Heidi sitting on his bed.

"Heidi, what are you doing? I figured that you want to go to your house and sleep all day after everything that has happened, and how did you get here so fast?"

"Oh, I used Aria's Superspeed to get here. Anyway, I am tired and I so desperately want to sleep, but that I made a promise to you, remember? And I'm here to complete my end of the deal." Heidi says as Jessie perked up and blushed as he went over to sit down on the bed while his girlfriend stood up from the bed and winked at him sensually as she reached down to grab her pants and panties as the shoulder-length light ash-brown haired girl then pulled them down and we cue over to Jessie's point of view as a golden light emitted from Heidi's body and the sound of fanfare rang out as the blue-haired boy blushed heavily and smiled goofily while gaining hearty eyes as he raised his hands and made grabbing noises.

"I fucking LOVE South Park!"

~[Post Credit Scene]~

"..." We then cue over to a random room in the city of South Park as he was watching video surveillance of everything that Jessie did to the city of South Park and turned off all of the cameras as he narrowed his eyes stoically. "Hmmm, Dovahkiin the Dragonborn is a rather powerful individual...too powerful for my liking. He can destroy everything that I worked so hard for, and yet Dovahkiin gave me the key part in order to have my plans come to fruition because, back then, my power only relied on this idiot fatass, but now? My power will soon grow far beyond this pathetic mortal's body. It's time for Dovahkiin's Brothers and Sisters to wake up." The Mysterious Voice says with an evil grin while pressing a few buttons on his computer to show live footage of a bunch of kids of all shapes and ages standing in a football stadium-sized building that was filled with darkness. "Rise my Genetic Engineered Superhuman Army! Rise! RISEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The Mysterious Voice screamed while letting out a loud maniacal laugh as all of Jessie's Brothers and Sisters began waking up one by one with their eyes glowing a multi-colored energy as their new master's evil laughter rang out in their heads telepathically.

---

And done. I hope you guys enjoyed the final chapter of, 'South Park: The Journey of Jessie Gladstone in The Stick of Truth!', and I can't wait to write the 'South Park: The Fractured But Whole' Game soon.

Anyway, with that out of the way, I bid you all a farewell.