Chapter 7
Starrypaw stretched out her front paws and opened her jaws in a yawn. It was a couple days later. After quite a bit of down time from resting from her injury, she was ready to be active again. The rest of the apprentices were getting up, stretching and cleaning themselves. Spiderpaw was gone, so it was easy to assume he'd gone on the dawn patrol.
"I hope Dustpelt will show me a new skill today," Squirrelpaw said.
Whitepaw licked her paw and dragged it over her ear. "I've been training with Brackenfur so much lately. I hope I get to hunt a lot, or at least do a mock fight for training instead."
"We definitely need a lot of hunters," Shrewpaw said as he stretched each back leg in turn. "The food is a lot less. We were getting used to being well fed until the forest grew dry."
Starrypaw nodded in agreement.
"I could mock fight with you, Whitepaw," Squirrelpaw said, "just for fun."
Whitepaw's tail thrashed in excitement. "Sure!"
"Now?" Starrypaw countered. "I have a feeling you'll be called out by your mentors before you get a chance."
Squirrelpaw cast a glare at her. "No not now." She turned back to Whitepaw. "We can meet up later when we're both here. I'll win over you anytime," she teased in a much kinder way than when she'd spoken to Starrypaw. With a friendly flick of her tail towards Whitepaw, she disappeared out of the den.
Starrypaw sighed. She understood a lot better now why Squirrelpaw had always treated her in a rude way, but Squirrelpaw's own father had been a kittypet as well, and Starrypaw had never seen anything other than slight direspectfulness towards him. She twisted her head to lick the scrape along her flank to finish off her cleaning.
"Sorry about what Squirrelpaw says, Starrypaw," Whitepaw said as she shook her fur down.
Starrypaw paused in her licking. "It's not your fault. Squirrelpaw's just...stubborn."
Whitepaw brushed her tail against Starrypaw as she passed by. "You are right about that. It's dangerous to ruffle her fur!"
Starrypaw turned to Shrewpaw after she'd finished. They were the only ones left in the den. She rubbed her head against his cheek with a purr.
"I'm glad you're always there for me," she muttered.
Shrewpaw looked at her with love in his amber eyes. "Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"
"Well, you never had to."
Shrewpaw's eyes flashed with worry quite quickly. "What do you mean?"
Starrypaw felt a pang of regret, hoping she hadn't said the wrong thing. "What I mean is, no one is as kind to me as you. Besides my parents of course, or...my not real parents.
You never needed to be so nice to me, but you did."
Shrewpaw relaxed, and Starrypaw felt her anxieties go away. "Trust me Starrypaw, I will always love you, no matter where you came from or how you got here."
Starrypaw's eyes widened. It was obvious all along, but it was the first time his love for her had been confessed aloud. "Me too," she finally added. They leaned into eachother until their mentors called their names.
When they slipped out of the den, Starrypaw streaked over to Graystripe, who was waiting by the gorse tunnel.
"You're on my hunting patrol," he said to her. "Brackenfur, I want you to lead a patrol of two warriors of your choice. Thornclaw, Ashfur, you're with me."
Starrypaw felt a shiver of excitement. If Thornclaw was coming, then Shrewpaw was bound to be coming as well. It had been forever since she'd gotten to hunt alongside him!
"Graystripe!" Cinderpelt said loudly, breaking Starrypaw's thoughts.
Graystripe turned expectantly, but he looked calm and kind. "What do you need, Cinderpelt?"
"Can I borrow Starrypaw for a second? I want to check her wound to ensure she's healing all the way."
Graystripe hesitated, but after he watched Brackenfur slip out of the warrior's den with his patrol he nodded. "That's fine, we can wait."
"I promise you, it won't take long. If she needs more rest I'll let you know. Come on, Starrypaw."
Starrypaw trotted lightly after her, relieved Graystripe was deciding to wait and not telling her to rest here while Shrewpaw went off hunting without her.
Starrypaw entered the den, following behind Cinderpelt. "Starrypaw, law down for a minute," she said.
After Starrypaw splayed out, Cinderpelt parted the fur on her flank. "It looks great! No infection it seems. You're good to go. I might send Leafpaw over before bed to check again before we all go to sleep. Be careful not to overdo it!"
Starrypaw stood and nodded. "Thanks!"
Not a minute later, Starrypaw was trotting beside Shrewpaw at the back of the hunting patrol. She occasionally cast him an excited glance, but she focused on the forest around her, straining to pick up sounds and scents of prey. Now that she was back in the swing of things, her lack of food had caught up with her, and the thought of fresh kill was great. It was crazy to her that only a few days before she could barely walk, and now she was hunting comfortably. She sent a silent thanks to StarClan that she'd regained strength so quickly.
A rustle nearby caught her attention. She crouched down and crept forwards until she could see a vole munching on some plants. Her belly fur brushed the ground as she crept closer and closer. Finally, she pounced and took it down successfully.
"Nice catch!" Shrewpaw said, trotting up as Starrypaw buried the vole.
Starrypaw nodded her thanks, and they continued on hunting until it was time to head back.
As Starrypaw placed her kills onto the pile, she sighed. The pile was still shrinking as prey continued to diminish along with the water. She brought the biggest mouse she'd caught to the elder's den and slipped inside.
"What do you have there, Starrypaw?" Frostfur asked.
Starrypaw set her prey down. "A mouse. As big as you can get right now."
Frostfur swiped her tongue over her lips. "The others have already been fed, so I can take it."
Starrypaw carried the mouse to Frostfur and set it in front of her paws. Not a second later, Frostfur was eating it quickly.
"Everyone good?" Starrypaw asked as she headed for the exit.
"Not yet," Speckletail said.
Starrypaw turned expectantly.
"You haven't heard a story yet. How about I tell you one about your father?"
Starrypaw felt a pang of sadness. She decided right then and there to tell the elders what she knew. Besides, she didn't see them often, and they deserved to know, really the whole Clan did.
She took a deep breath. "I already know," she said.
Speckletail turned her head in confusion. "Know what?"
Starrypaw looked down at her paws. "I know that Firestar is not my father, and that I'm not from ThunderClan. I was a kittypet, but I was too young to remember."
She looked up when she heard no reply and saw the elders exchanging sympathetic glances. Longtail kept his gaze on the floor, but Starrypaw could still see sympathy in his sightless eyes. Finally, Speckletail turned to Starrypaw.
"Well then, perhaps you can settle down and hear the story of how you were found."
Starrypaw's eyes widened, and to her surprise, she felt a spark of excitement. "Okay."
Starrypaw stretched out across the empty space in the den, excited to hear about herself. She hardly noticed the dull pain of her healing wound although she turned to lick it once or twice.
"One night, when it neared moonhigh, the warrior posted as a guard, Graystripe I believe, heard a kit's cries coming from somewhere near the camp. He went out and found an extremely young kit placed carefully in a bush on some pinestraw and leaves. It's eyes were not even yet open. A kittypet scent was everywhere nearby, and it was obvious the kit had been left on purpose.
"Graystripe took the freezing bundle into the camp, and after telling Firestar, brought her to the freshest queen with kits practically the same age. Sandstorm nursed her and cared for her, raising her alongside her own daughters. Graystripe even requested to mentor her because of how much he respected her strength as such a young kit able to survive the freezing forest. Now, she shows promise as a strong warrior to protect and defend her Clan like no other."
When Speckletail had finished, Starrypaw stared at the ground, emotions flowing out of her like a river.
"Thankyou, Speckletail," she said as she stretched and slipped out of the den quickly.
Starrypaw headed to the fresh kill pile with her head down low. She'd known that she'd been found in the forest, but she'd never known that Graystripe had even requested to mentor her. Suddenly, Starrypaw had a renewed respect for him.
"Starrypaw," a voice said.
Starrypaw looked up to see Shrewpaw trotting over to her. Her heart warmed.
"Everything okay?" he asked.
Starrypaw nodded and padded over until she could touch noses with him.
"I'm going to eat," she said.
"Alright well I'll..."
"Shrewpaw!"
They both turned their heads to see Thornclaw trotting over. He seemed to be attempting to hide his frustration.
"I told you we're going to train remember?" he said with a quick flick of his tail.
"Oh right! Sorry, Thornclaw. See you later, Starrypaw." He entwined his tail with her's, and it slipped out as he walked away.
As Starrypaw picked a starling from the pile and settled down to eat, she felt a wave of disappointment. Instead of leaning against Shrewpaw, now she was completely alone. However, she shrugged it off. If she was going to be a formidable warrior, she needed to keep feelings from getting in her way sometimes. She'd learned the hard way what happens when you dwell too long on something that upsets you. As if on cue, Starrypaw felt a twinge in the scratch along her flank. She ignored it and continued to eat fairly fast.
While she was finishing up, she watched Squirrelpaw and Whitepaw mock fight by the apprentice's den. They were both very good, but Whitepaw had a bit of an upperhand because she was bigger and older as well.
"Watching them fight?"
Starrypaw turned to see Leafpaw padding over. She looked tired, and her paws dragged a bit.
"Yep. Are you alright? You look sleepy," Starrypaw replied.
Leafpaw nodded. "Last night was a halfmoon. I had the medicine cat gathering remember?"
Starrypaw's eyes widened. "Oh right! How was it?"
"Pretty great. I'm not allowed to tell you about it though, remember?" Leafpaw said as she settled onto the ground beside Starrypaw.
Starrypaw nodded and began running her tongue in rythmic strokes over Leafpaw's ear. She could feel Leafpaw relax and purr softly, and her eyes were closed comfortably. Regardless of whether or not they were real sisters by blood, their bond was closer than normal cats in the Clan.
When Starrypaw looked back in the direction of the mock fight, all she saw was Squirrelpaw giving her a deep glare. Behind her green eyes were anger and hatred, but Starrypaw was sure she could see some envy and sadness. What was the true reason Squirrelpaw hated her so much?
"Starrypaw!" Graystripe called.
"Got to go, Leafpaw. See you." Starrypaw gave her one last lick and bounded away to Graystripe sitting near the highrock.
"We're going to train. I think Squirrelpaw will join us."
Starrypaw felt a sinking feeling as Dustpelt and Squirrelpaw trotted up to them. She didn't look at Squirrelpaw, but she could feel her piercing gaze on her the whole way to the training hollow.
"Go!" Dustpelt called out.
Squirrelpaw was first to make a move, and she rushed forwards, paws outstretched. Starrypaw leapt up to counter her, but without warning, Squirrelpaw ducked down, barrelling her head into Starrypaw's underbelly. They rolled and Starrypaw struggled to remain on top. Finally, they stopped, and Squirrelpaw was pinned underneath her.
"Good job, Starrypaw!" Graystripe praised.
Squirrelpaw struggled but Starrypaw kept her weight firmly down.
"Get off of me!" Squirrelpaw grunted.
Starrypaw felt a start of surprise. Instead of only acting like her normal frustrated self, hot anger flowed off of Squirrelpaw.
"Squirrelpaw, use your skills!" Dustpelt called out behind them.
It was as if Squirrelpaw hadn't heard him. "You think you're so strong don't you?" she growled.
Starrypaw suddenly felt angry herself. "Why do you hate me? Just because I'm a kittypet?! What did I ever do? You have kittypet blood too!"
Squirrelpaw looked surprised at her outlash, but she shook her head, and her anger returned. "You act like you're really my sister!"
As she spoke, she thrusted her hind legs hard into Starrypaw's stomach. Starrypaw flew off and landed with a hard thud, knocking the wind out of her. Squirrelpaw stalked up to her in anger as she stood slowly.
"Squirrelpaw! That was a bit too harsh! Starrypaw's still recovering! This is just practice," Dustpelt said, padding towards them.
Squirrelpaw ignored him. "Firestar is not your father, Sandstorm is not your mother, and Leafpaw is my sister! You're treated better than me, and you weren't even born here!"
Starrypaw suddenly remembered the time when they were kits and Squirrelpaw had told her she wasn't her sister. She'd been hinting at the truth, Starrypaw realized.
Squirrelpaw stopped nose to nose with Starrypaw, and while her wound stung, Starrypaw forced herself to stand her ground.
"Are you saying I don't belong here? That I shouldn't be in ThunderClan?" Starrypaw said calmly, despite her nerves.
Squirrelpaw unsheathed her claws and dug them into the ground. It seemed she was fighting the urge to swipe Starrypaw.
"I'm saying that you don't belong in my family!"
Suddenly, Squirrelpaw leaped at Starrypaw. She didn't know what to do as she felt her claws scrape her sides. Starrypaw twisted to try and fight back without hurting anyone, and she managed to push Squirrelpaw's head down without unsheathing her own claws.
In a second, Graystripe and Dustpelt had pulled them apart. Squirrelpaw stood beside Dustpelt, glaring at Starrypaw.
"Squirrelpaw!" Dustpelt whirled on her. "What do you think you're doing?"
"Starrypaw," Graystripe muttered, drawing Starrypaw's attention away. "Are you alright?"
Starrypaw nodded and turned to lick her coat down. She was grateful to see no scratches had broken through her skin although her fox scratch was burning.
"What happened? Why did she attack you?"
Starrypaw shook and faced him. "She's angry at me."
His golden yellow eyes showed sympathy, and his neck fur bristled uncertaintly. Starrypaw didn't want him to think something was horribly wrong.
"It's alright," Starrypaw said to Graystripe. "I'll be fine."
She turned to see Squirrelpaw give her one last hard stare before being pushed on by Dustpelt back towards the camp.
"Why don't you hunt?" Graystripe suggested softly. "I'll head back and help Dustpelt sort this out."
"Sure," Starrypaw replied gratefully.
Graystripe gave her a reassuring brush with his tail before he trotted off after Dustpelt and Squirrelpaw. Starrypaw turned the other way and trotted towards Sunningrocks, hoping to find some prey near one of the few water sources. Overcome by thoughts and emotion, Starrypaw broke into a run, and streaked the rest of the way.
When she reached the river between the borders of RiverClan and ThunderClan, she started at how much it had diminished. Any fish left were clearly visible in the thin trickle of the stream.
Starrypaw's attention changed to the forest around her when she heard rustling. Pricking her ears, she drew in the air and picked up the scent of a mouse. Dropping into a crouch, she slid forwards with her belly brushing the ground towards her prey. The mouse nibbled on a seed obliviously. Just as she bunched up her legs to pounce, a loud yell startled her.
"Hey!"
Starrypaw stopped mid thrust. The mouse scampered off quickly. She whirled around to see who had lost her such easy prey.
On the other side of the border stood a dark brown tabby tom with a snow white underbelly. His eyes were a piercing ice blue, and he lashed his tail angrily. He looked quite young, Starrypaw noted, and no other cat seemed to be with him.
"What?" Starrypaw asked.
"That was our mouse! You were stealing our prey!" he accused harshly.
"How? It was on ThunderClan territory."
"I tracked it here, so it was originally on RiverClan!"
Starrypaw stared in bewilderment. Either this cat didn't know the warrior code, or he was trying to stir up trouble purposefully.
"If you'd followed it onto our territory, that would've been trespassing, so technically it was fair game at that point." She paused and watched the river trickle on for a moment. "Who are you anyway?" she finally ventured.
The anger in the RiverClan cat's eyes faded to be replaced by a smug, bold expression. "I'm Hawkpaw, but my name won't be that for much longer. I'm going to be a warrior soon."
Starrypaw scanned the apprentice a moment longer. There was something eerily familiar about his broad shoulders and proud stature. She was so intent on remembering where she'd seen the form before that she didn't notice him speak to her.
"Hello? I asked you something," Hawkpaw demanded.
Starrypaw snapped back to his icy blue gaze.
"I sa-aid, 'Who are you then, if you're so quick to question me?'" His tail twitched impatiently.
Starrypaw stood tall and strong. "I'm Starrypaw."
"Ah so you're an apprentice," Hawkpaw said as if he wasn't one himself, "and a new one at that."
Starrypaw bit back a remark on his rank compared to hers. However headstrong he might've been, she wasn't about to start a fight with a random cat from another Clan.
"Anyway, be careful not to hunt anymore mice from RiverClan. We don't need apprentices stealing our prey," Hawkpaw added.
Starrypaw narrowed her eyes angrily. As if he didn't just loose me prey for my own Clan! I did nothing wrong! Starrypaw thought but didn't say out loud. She wasn't about to admit that it had cost them to loose the mouse and reveal a weakness in her Clan, though she was sure the RiverClan cats were struggling the same, seeing how low the river was. To that point it made sense on why he was so hostile, but the mouse had been completely fair game to her.
Mumbling something about ThunderClan, Hawkpaw bounded away, once again reminding Starrypaw how familiar his appearance was. She hadn't even met this cat in her life! Starrypaw shook off her feelings and turned back towards the camp.
As she scanned the forest floor for prey to bring back she thought back to her fight with Squirrelpaw. The real reason Squirrelpaw didn't like her wasn't because she was a kittypet. Squirrelpaw felt angry that Starrypaw fit in so well with her family when she wasn't from her family. Squirrelpaw was...
...jealous.
Is it really my relationship with Leafpaw? Starrypaw thought, or with Sandstorm or Firestar?
Her thoughts were troubling, and before long Starrypaw noticed she was headed the wrong way. Instead of heading back to camp she'd veered right and was headed towards Snakerocks, which was quite dangerous for an apprentice to go by themselves due to adders that lived in the crevices of the rocks.
Snakerocks..
Starrypaw slid to a halt, and her eyes widened. "Snakes!" she muttered to herself.
In an instant her dream from two nights before came rushing back to her. Bluestar's message had seemed so important, yet Starrypaw had completely forgotten about it. Now the blue-gray she-cat's words echoed in her ears as if she were standing there saying it in front of her.
"Beware of what lurks where you don't expect. There is danger beyond the forest."
Starrypaw headed back the right way, bringing down a pitiful thrush for the Clan. By the time she reached the tunnel, she was parched, and water in the camp was extremely scarce.
After depositing her single catch on the kill pile and getting a drink, Starrypaw headed to Cinderpelt's den, hoping to get some answers about her dream. If it was an important message from StarClan, then perhaps they thought Starrypaw a worthy warrior of ThunderClan, despite her lack of warrior blood.
"Hey, Starrypaw," a voice called out from behind.
Starrypaw turned from her straight shot to the medicine cat's den to see Brambleclaw padding quickly up to her. With a start she realized the similar broad shoulders she'd seen in Hawkpaw were now standing hastily in front of her.
"Did you hear what I said, Starrypaw?"
Starrypaw shook her head to clear everything from her mind. "No sorry."
Brambleclaw twitched his ears impatiently. "Firestar wants to see you in his den. He says it's urgent."
Starrypaw nodded her thanks and headed for the den under the highrock. She had a strong hunch that she knew what the urgent matter was.
As she crouched to enter the den, she tried to push every other whirling thought to the back of her mind. This was about Squirrelpaw and their fight, not her dream with Bluestar or Hawkpaw's scary similarity to Brambleclaw.
"Starrypaw," Firestar's voice rang out, "you're here."
Starrypaw shook and sat politely after entering. To her surprise, Cinderpelt sat towards the back beside Firestar, Sandstorm, and Graystripe. Sandstorm trotted up to her and rubbed her head against Starrypaw's head. When she stepped back, Starrypaw saw sorrow reflected in her eyes.
"You know?" she asked quietly.
Starrypaw nodded slowly. She knew exactly what her mother was asking.
"Now it makes sense why you were so exhausted that day," Graystripe said, sitting beside Sandstorm.
Starrypaw licked her chest in embarrassment. If only she'd listened to Cinderpelt the first time and believed in herself.
"Let her come in," Firestar said.
Sandstorm and Graystripe stepped aside, and Starrypaw padded up to Firestar and Cinderpelt. She bowed her head respectively. Firestar wasn't a father to her anymore, or at least not in the same way. A pang of sadness hit her like a sharp claw, and she lifted her head slowly.
"Starrypaw," Firestar began, sorrow beginning to brim his eyes, "why did Squirrelpaw attack you?"
Starrypaw breathed out a long sigh and stared at the ground. There was a mixture of feelings leaving her and racing into her. "She's angry with me." There was a long moment's silence. "She hates me," Starrypaw finally said.
Cinderpelt made a scoffing sound that caused Starrypaw to glance up. "She doesn't hate you."
"Well then how come ever since I've opened my eyes, she's glared at me or..or said rude things to me or acted like she wished I never lived!?" Starrypaw breathed hard at the anger that suddenly coursed through her.
With a jolt of embarrassment, Starrypaw realized they were all staring at her with surprise and sympathy. She lowered her head in shame. "Sorry," she muttered.
Suddenly, Firestar slid the tip of his tail under her chin. Starrypaw looked up abruptly.
"Starrypaw, have you ever felt jealous?" he asked. "Not like wishing you had power or a title, but jealous of love. I guess what I mean is, have you ever been jealous of the love someone else is recieving?"
Starrypaw rushed back to two weeks before when she'd entered the gorse tunnel and seen Shrewpaw sharing tongues with Whitepaw. The frustration and hurt she'd felt then, even before she'd had the same connection with Shrewpaw that she had now, had been so strong. Suddenly, it made sense.
"Yes," Starrypaw said finally. "Yes I have. I understand why Squirrelpaw is upset with me."
Cinderpelt exchanged a surprised glance with Firestar for a brief moment before he turned and cleared his throat. "We've already spoken to Squirrelpaw, and she's been punished, but don't be rude to her. She needs time to think. I want her to know that she's loved, just as I want the same for you."
Firestar curled his tail around Starrypaw's shoulders and licked her between her ears. "You may not be my true daughter, Starrypaw, but you're one to me. No matter what."
"Now get some rest!" Cinderpelt demanded, nudging her towards the den entrance. "You've done too much on that injury today!"
After saying goodnight to everyone in the den, Starrypaw slipped out. The sun was now below the trees, and the sky was scattered with color and dotted with the first appearing stars. She jumped when she saw Shrewpaw dosing by the entrance.
"Shrewpaw!" she exclaimed.
He jumped up quickly. "Oh uh...hey, Starrypaw."
"What were you doing?"
"I was uh...waiting for you," he gave her cheek a quick swipe.
"And listening I suppose?" Starrypaw guessed.
Shrewpaw flattened his ears. "Yes, and listening. You're not mad are you?"
"Of course not, mousebrain! You're the first cat I'd tell anything new to, and now I don't have to tell you anything 'cause you already know. Saves me the trouble." She chuckled lightly and entwined her tail with his. "Let's eat, I'm starving."
As Starrypaw picked a vole from the small pile she suddenly remembered that she'd planned to talk to Cinderpelt about the dream. She decided it could wait until another day. She wanted to enjoy her evening with Shrewpaw.
After they finished eating, Starrypaw and Shrewpaw shared tongues as the second just over halfmoon rose into the darkening sky.
"I met someone really strange today," Starrypaw began at one point.
Suddenly, Leafpaw trotted over. Starrypaw knew why she was here, so she turned over onto her side accordingly.
"Yep," Leafpaw said drowsily, "I'm here to check your wound."
"Thanks, Leafpaw," Starrypaw said as she parted the fur on her flank.
"It looks great!" Leafpaw exclaimed. "It might be sore if you use it hard for a couple more days, but it'll be fine."
Starrypaw gave her a thankful lick before she dragged her weary paws back to Cinderpelt's den. "Thanks again!" Starrypaw called after her. "Get a good night's rest!"
When she turned back to Shrewpaw, he was headed towards the apprentice's den. "Come on, Starrypaw," he said kindly. "We need a good night's rest too!"
In the den, Starrypaw ran her tongue down Shrewpaw's side as he drifted to sleep. The strong feeling of affection she had for him flowed through her like a river. Let tomorrow be a good day, she thought. Finally, she drifted into an undisturbed slumber.